One habit that's a lot more difficult but super helpful to me whenever I can stick to it is to wash the dishes in the evening. It's a nice quiet end to my day (mindfulness :)), it makes me feel like I've accomplished something and it makes it a million times easier to eat breakfast in the morning. Also, the habit makes it easier to do the next day as well because I only ever have to wash the few dishes of this one day.
Picking up all the cat toys off the floor. Cause there's so many lol it makes a difference in how clean the house looks. And watching motivational vids like this one. Nothing shaming or harsh with high expectations that feel like a quantum leap from where I currently am. Just looking for smaller actions that are within my reach atm
@@imaginareality It's a great habit to have and one I really dislike doing myself. But what helps is I either rewatch episodes of my fav TV shows while I wash dishes or I watch a fun TH-cam video.
I have Major Depressive Disorder and have been lying in bed every day till about 3:00pm. Today I cleaned out my kitty's litter box & put in fresh litter & swept the bathroom floor. I take better care of her than myself. After watching this wonderful video, I'm going to force myself to take a shower.😊
The Sun and walking is important. Before you get depressed, get some sunshine and Vitamin D, then a walk or dance or stretch but you have to get the endorphins. Then read or listen to music and see if it helps. Medication may be adjusted or changed or needed
Aw I wanna give u a hug… get u outta ur house and take a walk in the park. Dont rely on others. Do it yourself and I’ll feel better. Get urself outta bed. Be ur own best friend
I struggle to get out of bed every single day...and most days I lose the battle. It's now 5 pm and I'm still in bed. Everything is black. The pain is unbearable. I no longer know where to turn. I don't have money for treatment and I struggle every day with thoughts of suicide, even though I am familiar with the devastation it leaves in its wake. I've struggled with depression for 53 years now and I feel soooooo alone and broken and damaged from it all. This has helped me to write it down.
I am sending a message out to the universe to help ease your pain. noone deserves to feel this way. i hope you keep looking for solutions here on youtube. they are good resources for free. I hope you find peace and inner happiness some day soon
Not when you live in a bad neighbourhood. I really have to pick time slots and even then Im sometimes too anxious and/or too tired to go outside in those timeframes. Im fine having my windows open for fresh air but no need to go outside that much. Its a luxury to me to be able to stay inside and have everything delivered anyway 😂
where do you live. I was on 7 mile in detroit last week. Only white guy within miles and guess what. Everyone I ran into were cool. I wouldn't do that at night.
Something that has helped me is calling the depression out for what it is. In my support network, if I'm around them, I will say "I've dipped" and that is understood by those close to me, to mean "I am feeling hopeless/ out of it/ down/ unmotivated etc". And that's when we will start do some healthy habits (many mentioned in this video). Another thing, a tough pill to swallow was accepting motivation would only come from action and not vise versa. So I've been working for years to change the way my mindset when it comes to my depressive episodes. A therapist once told me "depression is the overwhelming feeling of hopelessness". Take that with a pinch of salt, but it's helped me reframe in those "dips". It's sitting with those negative thoughts and countering them. For everytime the thought pops into my head (here's some examples) "this is never going to end" to "it did last time" or "what's the point in anything" to "I don't need to know the answer right now, but we can find it later" etc. It's about being kind to myself and accepting my brain, body etc sometimes has an unvoluntary off switch. And finding these things, habits, people who can remind me there is still a switch and it'll turn back on eventually. Last thing that has really helped me get out of the guilt spiral which often happens during or after a depressive episode- generally, we are alot kinder to loved ones than we are ourselves. For every thought or feeling you have about your situation/ depression, imagine it's coming from a loved one. How would you respond to what they're saying? What comfort or advice would you give? Now, say that to yourself because you deserve to love yourself as much as you love those around you. Obviously, I'm not a professional and I'm just sharing some lil things I've picked up along the way. I've struggled with mental health issues for the best part of ten years. It's only in recent years I've been able to start implementing healthy habits along the way. It was really tough at first. But the more practice I put into it, the easier it got. I hope this helps someone to know mental health isn't something you "get over" or "win the battle of"- it's something you can learn to live with and still be successful in things you want (family relations, career, school, being happy etc). Enough essay writing😂 hope you're all okay!
There is one thing that really worked for me - workout. Lifting weights helps me a lot. And the mere fact that I can physically change myself had a huge impact on my life. Try it. The best way to fight weakness is strength!
What you describe is a mild depression not a severe one. Trust me a severe one is not about bad mood, it’s about wanting to disappear 😢 Having said that all good advice. I think cold showers, hardcore exercises , talking to people, hyperventilating work too
I feel like the intensity is about the same. The problem is when it happens more often than not. Eventually the depression with cause such disruption in your life that you now have stuff to be really depressed about.
No, what he is giving is science based information that alleviates ALL kinds of dépression. Which is on a sliding scale. No one is special for suffering more. Some people embrace suffering, suggesting that it means that they are more sensitive, but refuse to do Anything to help themselves. Everything that he suggested is science based. Exercise has the équivalent value to prosac. Simply getting up Can make a difference. Failure to do basic hygiene diminishes you. Rewatch. Sounds like you need to.
I’ve been blindsided by depression and I feel I’m falling deeper and deeper. I will not admit to anyone I’m struggling and I will not ever ask for help. I can look at myself from a third person perspective and think, “what is wrong with you, you need help”…. Ugh, I just have to fix this myself !!! I know these very things you mention help as I’ve had a few days I could do one or two but making myself do them is like pulling teeth and yet I don’t know why…..this is NOT me !!! I never have skimped on hygiene, it was a priority, now if I shower, wash my hair, brush my teeth and get dressed I feel I’ve done a days work……what, how can I feel like this ??? I have no desire to do anything, even things I love to do. I’m hoping it’s just menopause and it will pass because I want me back but can’t find her !!!!
I feel almost the same as you described, though it is not related to menopausal thing. But at the age 65 onwards you are back to square one taking care of loved ones all by yourself managing each and every task needed to care for your husband for years and years and it seems no end to getting "cancer is gone and you are cured" news, one feels so dejected that when I can enjoy my days after my retirement with my husband and visit my sons families? I am tied up to home only unless going out for medical appointments, getting medical prescriptions and/or groceries. No social life of our Indian community whatsoever in this small town! Not complaining about taking care of my ill husband, I do it with total devotion, but certainly never expected that we will have to go through such harsh and hard time!
I had been seriously depressed for months and couldn't get out of it. I saw this video and said to myself, What the heck, why not? I picked one tiny task that even didn't take a minute. (I watered a wilting plant). The next day I did that twice. I broke the overwhelming sink full of dishes into "wash one cup". I did it each day. I kept doing little things, like not taking a shower, just washing my face. until one sunny day I had enough energy to do two tiny things. The more I kept doing little things, the more I felt like I must be getting a little better. And I did. And I didn't even blame myself for not doing everything. It wasn't fast, but slowly each day was a little better instead of the same depression. Slowly I did more and more little things until I was acting and feeling almost normal. I'm not quite back to normal, but I'm enough normal to go to bed feeling like I did some good things. Thanks much more than one word.
Thank you Dr. Ali! I LITERALLY achieved my PhD One minute at a time! with many of the same techniques. There is a terrible Adam Ant vampire movie that is clearly about addiction, but my favorite part is that it turns out the cure for vampirism... is to just start being a human again... just start eating good food and sleeping like a human... Everytime I feel myself slipping into the pit, I remind myself to just go through the motions until it happens, just start acting like a human and I will turn it around.
I'm not kidding you! During the last few months of writing my dissertation, my todo list was Monday:take book off shelf, Tuesday: put book on desk, Wednesday: open book, Thursday: find topic, Friday: Read one page... It really is just doing one thing until action triggers motivation
I agree with you, I suffered with this and social anxiety ,undiagnosed for more than two decades while self medicating with alcohol and fighting depression,I fixed myself in the end by going for a walk,Just being among people stopped me from feeling so alone and I found that I would have moments of clarity,My mum asked me to build her a table so I reoccupied my mind and planned the build of this table down to the last detail,I obsessed about every detail,bought the tools and materials needed and just built it because the blueprint was in my head,find something you used to enjoy be it cooking or being creative and make it happen,The walking and better choices will help you lose weight and improve your self image.Find a purpose learn a skill and get up and move forward.
When you have depression like I do your house is probably really dirty and cluttered, it's so cluttered that you don't even know where to begin cleaning? Set a timer for 10 minutes and clean until that timer goes off. Do that everyday and before you know it your house will be clean.
Try fish oil, vitamin D, vitamin B12, and sunshine. For anxiety try a supplement called Less Stress or Buh-Bye Stress. Chamomile tea or Passionflower tea helps my anxiety. Wishing you all the luck and prayers for your recovery. Try talking to God sometimes if you believe in that sort of thing. Helps me feel better. Hopefully I didn't offend you. I just want you to feel better.💛🕊️ Peace.
Same i have both depression n anxiety n it’s so hard to pretend to be okay coz nobody understands you n your problem. Instead of support people think that i m exaggerating, overthinking n worrying too much however this is not at all the case with being depressed n anxious.
@@rifsanahusain6116same with me no one can understand you better than you, people even friends think you're exaggerating & that's make me feeling worse trying to explain n defend myself.
I’ve seen many vids from trained professionals giving advice but I’d say yours is the most helpful. Depression often goes hand in hand with overwhelm and sometimes, one minute is all you can accomplish without, yet again, feeling like a failure. 👍
I'm 60 (retired) and in a dark hole for 4 years now (realized it started as deep sadness, so I'll see your other video after this 😁), just starting to come out, getting more balanced emotionally using a lot of these things you've mentioned. It's a struggle every single day and it's been hard and a long haul (my dr suggested it might also be from aging and/or menopause, but that's been 10 yrs now) but it IS getting slightly easier and more "good" moments happening (phew!). I appreciate this video, thank you; you really do have to feel the lows and then work on it as often as possible - it does get easier. I now set an alarm in the morning so i don't sleep too long (which makes me feel like I'm wallowing or wasting my time), get out of bed and do my personal cleaning, do makeup and hair and get out of my pajamas into "ready for the day" or "ready to go out" clothes (i plan the next day - a very simple easy one - just b4 bed). Makes a big difference, it is 99% of the time, so it's starting to become a habit. Just sharing. Thanks!
@@klanderkal Hm. Hard to say. I retired just before the-virus-that-must-not-be-named hit us in March. Maybe. We had planned to travel etc but got a whole other bunch of problems and issues instead, and too much thinking as we both research everything. 😆I am trying to balance my research, knowledge, and live a good life despite it all now. 🙂
Many of the things you have described (examples sitting in your pajamas, not taking a shower) convince me that you know exactly what you were talking about. I believe most of your advice in this video would be beneficial. So now I am wondering, why do I feel overwhelmed by these things that could help, and why do I feel more depressed, but I am not able to easily do these things when I once could. it was harder to watch this video than I expected instead of feeling motivated I feel more of a failure. These things may not actually be enough to make a difference anymore. I still want to say thank you. I hope I can watch this again when my mind is ready. 👍👏👏👏
For me getting out in nature is the best. Going down to the river in winter and taking my shoes off and walking in the river up to my knees. Or showing my dog affection and taking her down to the park for a walk.
This is great! I clicked on the video half-expecting a list of habits that feel overwhelming and impossible to implement and to then start crying in despair. You know, the usual advice we tend to get: excercise for 30 minutes every day, get up every day at around the same time in the morning, stick to a balanced diet etc.. (Only yesterday I read an article on how to make decisions when depressed - something I struggle with a lot - and one of the tips was to meal prep for the entire week. Sure, it feels almost impossible to take a can of soup, dump it into a pot and eat it but let me just plan ten meals real quick.) Instead, this advice is actually helpful and there are a few things that I already try to do. Like going outside, even just walking to the mailbox and back.
Boy you are spot on! I just saw a video where the guy said exercise for 30 days 5 days a week. Ain't gonna happen! They tell you exercise rejuvenates you. WRONG. It tires you out, makes your body sore and sweat. If does nothing positive for me. And just look at the person recommending this - he's always slim and probably is into fitness. The average person in NOT!
So true. Lately I leave gum near my bed for days I can't be asked to brush my teeth. When bad..to even get a cup tea feels like climbing Mt Everest. Sometimes extreme hunger is only thing that forces me out to the shops. Then it lifts ..just on its own like a cloud. I've found sometimes I just have to submit and sit it out...
You can also try fish oil supplements and vitamin D, vitamin B1,and magnesium for anxiety and depression. Studies show that they worked for some people. 💛. Wishing and hoping you'll feel better soon! Hugs.
I cleaned my entire home and made my bed, got everything spotless last week, felt like something I never do. I was so comfortable and happy with it I didn't want to go to work for an entire week. I couldn't handle it, hard to understand.
I was 56 at the time. Was never prone to depression and never had a problem with the menopause, but i started feeling strange. My attitude was What's the point, all the time. It lasted 6 months. I prayed about it and asked the Lord for healing. I had some Estrogen gel, just in case i needed it once i went into menopause. Never used it, since i didn't need it. It had already expired by then by a few years. I was prompted to put some of it on my forearm soft skin. Went to bed and when i got up in the morning i felt great. I understood that was an answer to my prayer. My estrogen was too low, 6 years into menopause. A few months later i recognised the What's the point symptome and applied it again. It worked and never came back again.
Menopause effects many women so different. I wasn't prepared for all the pre years and follow up. It was over 10 years.. My mom didn't know or always stated she didn't have it.?? But in her family line there is overwhelming mental illness issues in women that started at the same age.. She even shared 2 more generations. We both swore we wouldn't be that way.. It still happened .. It does with education and more knowledge on medications and different life effects became more treatable with every generation. But I'm blessed to get this info
People can try them for a week, one each day and see. If they get some relief, they can extend time outside, exercise, or cleaning etc. They can also see a counselor, get evaluated for meds, talk to a priest, change diet and maybe supplement professional help with this DIY anti-depression kit.
@@paulmccarthy7461 I mean sure but like I said when u wake up with the level of depression I experience I promise you they can't do any of these. An achievement is getting out of bed to use the bathroom or speaking. I hope others get something from this tho 🙏
@@nicholaslogan5185I am truly sorry for your struggle with severe depression. Maybe a low dose of Suboxone would help you. It did for me. Also fish oil supplements and vitamin D and B1! At this point ,you need to take some kind of action to fight back against it so you can have a better quality of life. Wishing you happiness and speedy recovery. Really hope that you know that these are science backed remedies. X
@@nicholaslogan5185 I agree with you. Some people have real depression and they are not gonna be able to drag themselves out of the pit of darkness and pain to go for a walk. I thank God for Prozac every day and over the years I have learned the right dosage. But I am still very vigilant to avoid triggers as much as possible.
The first thing I do in the morning, I make my bed, that helps me feel less depressed. I got two anti-depressents, Seroquel and a tabby cat I named Margie, after my mom.
Thank you so much, really. Struggling with depression right now, I love that your advices are quite low-threshold and realistic. Sometimes you feel even more like a 'failure' when someone expect you to do 'big' activities which you can't, so it's great to see that it's really not about that big activities at all.
I agree. Both my son and daughter-in-law went through it after the birth of my grandson. They'd both been looking forward to becoming parents, but she had a dreadful pregnancy, followed by a harrowing birth, and then 2 years of surgeries and health scares, before my grandsons health stabilised and they knew he was going to be OK. For my daughter in law, it took another year for her to get the help she needed, but it was refused to my son, as it wasn't considered a male problem. Fortunately, his wife was able to help him through the help she was getting, and they both feel fine and are enjoying life with each other, but it makes me wonder, how many men just get beaten down without getting the help they need. And how many marriages break up because of it. It is about time that it is understood that men's emotions and mental health can be damaged too!
One household trick which really helped me, using the tactic of breaking tasks down, has been taking the dread out of refrigerator blues by cleaning just one shelf or drawer at a time. I don't need so much counter space to put yhings. It does'nt even matter if I don't do another shelf the next day. It's better than it was. Also, vacuuming just part of the house. I have a small house, so I do either the upstairs or downstais. I used to think I had to complete every task. I'm over that now, and it really helped
Before black hole Action leads to motivation 1 minutes achivement Develope habit Notice thoughts Clean in a minute Reward yourself in a minute Interact with a living one in a minute Go outside or walk for a minute Check off one thing..one minute achivement/ completion
I have the EXACT same thing. Clockwork. It took me a few years to see the pattern. If you, by any chance, know of an online support group for SAD, please post a reply comment. By the way, I often get off my anti-depressants (successfully) for the summer, and get back on them again in enough time before the time changes. That has helped me alot.
You're amazing! I'm having a hard time with depression, and I'm so happy that your suggestions are manageable and do-able. It's so easy to feel like a failure when you need to be doing massive amounts of stuff. It's quite freeing to realize that it's the little things that can make the most impact ♥
Thank you, Dr. Ali! Excellent video. I suffer from depression and anxiety. I will try your 5 points. I struggle often times to get off my couch and get going. At times, I feel great, and other times, I struggle to do little things.
When I get in a bad state, there are two kind of silly things I do before I even actually *do* anything about it. I sing “Put One Foot In Front of the Other” from the old Santa Claus claymation movie where the Warlock is learning how to walk and it melts his frozen exterior. It’s upbeat, catchy, and is quite literally about how a single physical step can lead more positive things. The second thing is I say “inch by inch” to myself. My throwing coach used to say that because I would get reeaallly upset that I wasn’t making big progress (like the crying breakdown kind of upset, it was an issue lol). It’s easy to get frustrated and demotivated when you’re in the black hole with tasks piled all around you, but I just hear his voice in my head reminding me that any progress is progress and it stops the doom spiral in my brain so I can focus on what the next step is.
I find it useful to watch videos on You Tube about depression especially people’s personal accounts. I begin to feel less isolated and also empathy towards the person. Also on my computer mindlessly eliminating documents n photos I don’t need. Good luck everyone 🚀
It's a relief to hear someone like you who is shaming people who need medication because they have REAL chronic depression, and not temporary sadness. Oh wait, no, relief is not the right word at all.
@@iExploder Most people don't actually need meds. The pharmaceutical industry has fooled society and medical professionals into thinking they need it in order to turn a huge profit. It's a trillion dollar industry.
@@dianeamaral8151 True. Thanks. And I left a reply to the previous person about how most people don't need the meds but the meds are just a way for greedy big pharmaceutical companies to turn a buck. Seems TH-cam deleted my reply. Go figure.
This depression started a few years ago. Nothing seemed to work since my ex husband cheated and left me. I didn’t trust my own judgement as he seemed so different than who he turned out to be. I made new friends but could never trust another man again. Things have gone from sad to worst and I’ve made so many efforts … but now especially since the pandemic. I feel hopeless and stuck in a pleasures-less life where nothing gives me 5:33 joy. I’m tired now.
I like the black hole and rocket analogy. I was doing all of this and then some, but sometimes you just wake up into depression, like it doesn't even have a triggering event, and the habits just all go out the window because you're already in the black hole, there's no powering a rocket in there it's just crushed already.
I find it more validating to acknowledge what you said: that you can't even see a trigger (but there probably is one even though you aren't aware of it) than to say "wash the dishes and you'll feel better". Yes, washing the dishes WILL make you feel better. The problem is that you are too depressed to summon the rational person inside of you. If someone validates my pain by UNDERSTANDING that I am IN PAIN, that will likely often be the catalyst by which I can start feeling better and do these great suggestions.
@@fathbalbar I am so sorry that you thought you were the only one. If you find a website forum for people suffering from depression, you might feel more validated (and better as a result). I am not in a forum for depression, however, I am in a forum for HSP (highly sensitive people) who often suffer from depression due to their sensitivity to triggers and it helps a lot when there is someone who understands what you are going through. It is especially good for you if YOU can offer some comfort to another suffering person.
I love the 5..go outside so right. It helps to naturally look outward and not inward exclusively. My teen can stay in a room (box) all day horizontal and screen staring. When i say you need to go outside he says ..why? Scary..
For me the key to ease depressive phases is to be a little productive. Write an idea (just five sentences); or play the base guitar; continue a thing that you (by your own reasons) should do. It doesn't really matter how much time I invest in those things (five minutes (or one minute, however I wasn't wet so deep in depression) or two hours), afterwards I always feel a tiny bit better, in the way of: at least I have done somthing purposeful.
Thank you for this video... I am just now starting to get over depression and anxiety which caused me to be unable to fall asleep, leading me to more horrible thoughts and the vicous cycle raged on.. I especially love number 5.. there are so many things you can do to treat yourself and I plan on doing all of them you mentioned.. Again, thank you so much for this most amazing video...
My depression was so much worse than most of this. I felt sick and nauseous all the time. Incapable of feeling ANY happiness. Could not eat, or barely sleep. Finally I got the right medicine, it was the only thing that worked.
Such good tips that do help me. The hardest is going outside cause anxiety about other people but it really turns things around for a bit to place yourself in a different environment. So appreciated your vulnerability about your own struggles, too. I feel slightly less silly about rage crying over small things now lol
Glad the video resonated with your experience. Something I remind myself is we are all human. We have similar software. So if I am experiencing something, every other human also has the capacity for feeling the same thing. It’s just a matter of our unique biology, environment, and experience that lead to more or less of these thoughts and emotions.
Thanks for this. Really appreciate your openness and sincerity. You have clearly "been there". I was such a mess at the beginning of the year that I didn't get around to buying a diary/planner for work until February. Having missed the boat, there was limited choice. In fact, there was only one. So I bought it and started adding stuff, and one of the features of this particular planner was that it had a section on each page with the heading "Habit tracker". So I started by writing a few habits I've let slip that I know help me; Yoga, Guitar, Duolingo, Walking, Getting out in the garden, playing a little footie, and doing something chakra related. I'm kind to myself, and will tick the box for two minutes of yoga in the shower, one Duo lesson, playing one song, walking 100 metres for the view at the top of the street, picking some fresh herbs for dinner, passing a ball with my son or playing some hacky with the kids I work with, or just holding some crystals. I don't do each thing every day, but try to do some things most days, and some things I like to be able to tick even just once a week, I'm on a 175 day Duo streak today, I do a little yoga each day - maybe just two or three minutes, and my guitar playing is getting back to where it was before I got really unwell; even written a few cathartic new songs. I get a buzz from ticking the boxes, and it has made me much more habit conscious, which you obviously know makes a big difference. Don't normally leave comments on TH-cam, but I was moved by your genuineness, and just started typing. Hope this helps to further validate your generous work, and in turn helps someone else out there. Also, hope you're keeping well and being that great Dad - it's the best thing in the world, right? On days when everything feels too much, I keep it simple and ask myself three questions; is my son happy? Is my son safe? Does my son know how much he's loved? The answers are always yes, and the time taken to think about it refocuses my silly brain and pushes all the clutter aside, refocusing on the only thing that really matters. I told him I've started doing this - he's 11 but a wise old soul, and I just know he's going to actively prompt me to check my three questions next time I'm on the downward spiral. And hopefully it's good modelling for him - he's a sensitive boy, a lot like me, and I know I need to keep an eye on him there, so there's a further practical reason to check in on his wellbeing. Anyway, this has turned into quite the ramble, but will finish by saying that next year, when I get my new planner, the first thing I'll do is dedicate a space on each page for my habit tracker. All the best from Aotearoa/New Zealand.
Making other's smile/happier is one of my go to's. I have been dealing with really bad depression and suicidal ideations for quite some time now but I am all about homeopathic healing. I have many ways of helping myself through it even though I struggle beyond sometimes too🙏 I love to lift other's up even if it's just making fun of myself and them smiling out loud😁🤪 I don't have any kind of personal life at all no family or friends but I when I'm around other's even if just at the grocery store I end up feeling so much better afterwards most of the time because bringing Sunshine into other people's lives especially when I'm feeling my worst vicariously helps me feel better if not just for that moment😌🙏💐✌️
Doc, I just found your channel and you have hit “depression” by definition for me perfectly! These techniques are all very true! Not complicated…exactly what a depressed person needs. I’m depressed however hovering up and down, (guilt for no reason, small panic attacks etc.) these are great tools that I can use in my tool box. All of these skills will create that small light in the dark void that allows you understand there is hope to eventually get out of this depressed state. Thank you Dr.
At 56 I raised 3 sons and there dad did much better once we were divorced.. I think it is inspiring how this dad is so much into hos children's life. Many men have depression but in my experience in my younger days many women always felt we had 3 HUGE jobs.. It was just society. I do know 2 of my sons are very much part of their baby daughters life.. VERY involved and I love it.thanjs
Your description of depression and how to deal with it in terms of your habits is so accurate and spot on! I deal with major depressive disorder and your advice on this video is extremely helpful.
You keep talking about going outside going outside going outside well it’s not that easy first you gotta get up then you gotta get dressed the heck with it I’m going back to bed. This guy seems to want to help the depression but you got a really understand it to help us get over depression, and so far you’re one idea out of five or six were pretty good and it’s up to any of you guys to pick up one that I picked. Have yourself a good day.
Try some fish oil supplements and vitamins D and B1. They are proven to ease symptoms of depression. You could also consider low dose Suboxone for treatment resistant depression. It really helps me. I hope you're able to feel better soon. A big hug to you friend. Wishing you all the luck and happiness.
I don't find some of these replies to be validating at all which will probably mean they make you feel worse rather than better. What you might need is someone who understands the type of pain you are in and the feeling of being understood often helps lift the veil of pain. I hope you feel better.
I need to watch you more. Haven’t showered in a month, don’t care. I do use soap clothes that to don’t require rinse and body wipes. I have chronic pain from back issues and so out of shape, if I shower, it wears me out for the day. I don’t know what a routine is anymore.
This is an excellent tool. Sometimes you must rack your brain to come up with three things a day for which you are grateful. Don't forget about clean water and having the willpower to get up today. Don't take things for granted and after a while this will have a positive affect on your brain.
Thank you for you being so honest about your own challenges after the birth of your child. Not many men speak about this as the focus is mostly on women. Love these amazing times. Small and manageable ❤
You should try fish oil supplements,they are proven to help with anxiety and depression. Also vitamin D and B1 and magnesium. I had such severe depression that I went on Suboxone for treatment resistant depression. It helps me some. I hope you find some of my suggestions helpful.💛🕊️. Wishing you peace and happiness.
I so appreciate how you integrate your own personal sharing into your relevant tips. Your channel has been an inspiration to me in so many ways, and your authenticity as a therapist is a big one. Congrats on your littles! I'm in a similar phase of life. The struggle to shower is real!
Action leads to motivation. So true. Often I start the week with a big ugggh! Questioning what Im doing with my life then by Friday Im grateful for sticking it out, I have plenty of money for all necessities & I feel healthy & much more well emotionally. Its he stillness that creeps up & becomes malignant. I often just listen to ppl when I get into a funk. There are LOTS of problems & lots of suffering out there. Its not just me in fact its just about everyone. Sometimes after taking in all of my coworkers problems I just say to myself I really have no problems & Im grateful. Not many can say this. A relationship would be welcome though.😊
Good advice considering I’m depressed and have always tried to tackle things all or nothing when I’m normal. It’s good to concede and just realize/approach tasks in terms of baby steps vs not getting out of bed. Enough horrible days will pass.
Thank you for your tips. They really help. I’ve been struggling with depression recently and it can be overwhelming. Your ideas are simple and effective. Best wishes to everyone dealing with this.
I can’t go out thanks to irresponsible dog owners who’s dogs are aggressive where I live. It’s making me profoundly depressed. My local council aren’t helping. I spend my days creating. I so agree with everything you’ve said
Thank you for this Dr. Ali! One habit that I've recently started that has been helping is to attend at least one mental health peer support group a week. A therapist recommended DBSA to me, and it's been very encouraging so far.
❤ Dear Doctor Mattu, if you hoped to make at least a small difference with your video, I'd like you to know that it did! Your brave and generous way of sharing first hand experience AND applicable advice speaks a lot to me! It inspired me to get up and brush my teeth now. 🙈 Later I'll get a work related thing done, that is also only in my best interest! 🌻👍 I'm already looking forward to the feeling of accomplishment! I wish you, your family and friends the best! Thank you 🌻
I live in 500 Unit High Rise and I'm a pretty happy person, but I notice if I get in a little bit of a funk the minute I walk outside through my Park and interact with people I feel better. Plus the Gym is my drug. A nice work-out with various machines gets my juices flowing and a trip to Steam Room helps.
Loved all his recommendations. I think keeping busy definitely helps. Didn't realize I do most of these things already. Could probably work on going outside more. He seemed like a real person. Didn't realize guys could also get postpartum. Interesting stuff
Cuddle with a stuffie is my favorite. Finally a doctor I feel I can trust because you are sharing what your experience has been and what has worked for you. And these are action based solutions to use, not medicine to take every day with side effects to deal with which only adds to my anxiety and depression. But don't get me wrong. Sometimes for some people medication may be a solution that you may need and could work. Thank you for this video. Very useful. Like, subscribed and bell.❤
I like your reply because you acknowledge that while cuddling helps you, there are others with severe depression who may need meds. Bless you for your understanding.
John 14:27 Peace 🌈 I leave with you; my peace I give you😀. I do not give to you as the world 🌍 gives. Do not let your hearts face-red-heart-shape be troubled and do not be afraid.
Dear sir.. Could you please make a video on how to manage mood swings caused by periods. It sometimes make me take things personally and make me feel even more sad
Anhedonia is not wanting to do things , its inability to get satisfaction out of things you do or listen or watch. So behavioural activation is only really good for avolition. That is what not wanting to do things. It even actually feels worse to force yourself to do things when you are seriously feeling bad and have anhedonia.
Man I’m to the point where I almost wish I remembered how it felt to actually cry. I’ve been in this hole so long I don’t even cry about it anymore. Feels sometimes like my life is just completely void of any genuine emotion anymore.
Move your body. The energy in your body can't flow when you don't move your body. That stagnant energy needs to get going. Hence the tip to jump up and down. Try to shower every day. Visualise that every drop of water that lamds on your body is a mini energy injection. Also visualise that the soapy water you rinse of is your depressed state. See it leaving down the drain. Visualise yourself in a feel good state. Visualisation is a powerful tool. You can get of the that black hole. I've been there myself. Life isn't pointless. We've all lived many lives prior to this one. Robert Schwartz book Your soul's plan might be a game changer if you can read with your heart instead of your mind. Suerte friends. Much love to you ❤
I understand that I'm saposed to go for a walk and maybe set up my drums today or pick up my guitar. Consistency and discipline are what i want most of all.
Thank you doctor. This made a lot of sense. I have struggled with habits for years....and I always thought it was because of my depression. But, habits can actually motivate me to get back on track ' emotionally '........I really really hope.
The world has closed in on me. I have had several years of pain and immobility, lost both my parents, my support dog, and my eldest son (42) has terminal cancer. he will leave an eleven year old grandson. My partner has become distant, unco-operative, obstructive, sleeps on the sofa in the lounge, having worked until the early hours so I spend 95% of my time coping, or trying to, with being cold, not getting a decent sleep due to discomfort, pain and worry. I've treid to do my hobbies but drugs they've put me on mean poor concentration. I love things constantly. I can't garden any more (was my go to) and am only keeping going to support my sons. I can't see a way out of my situation or my circumstances. I've been battling with this new home for a year, and can't afford to move out. what's left to try?
My son is an alcoholic. Has Stage 4 liver failure. He lives in NZ. I live in row UK My other son has declared he never wants to speak to me again. I’m pretty low. Thanks for your advice. Mary from England
I have to say....showering is one of the first things I stop doing when life becomes overwhelming and depressing. Cleaning my house is the next, and I fall into clutter. TMS has helped me at least want to deal with things. Self soothing has become a debt problem for me, and wasting a lot of time on TH-cam has become a mental distrubance too, I believe
So sorry. I hope you can do one nice thing for yourself while you are waiting to feel better. I hope you are not isolated. Sometimes when we're depressed we want to be isolated even though it is a sad feeling to think we're alone.
That you referenced Star Trek “Trouble with Tribbles”, made your thoughts and ideas more meaningful for me!! I’m suffering all you are talking about and I’m grateful for your insight.
Life is hard, I haven’t seen my daughter since covid . Ex has taken my child and overseas law doesn’t support to see my kid. Luckily I have great job/career, working long hours, hitting gym everyday, lifting weights and thinking good for my daughter so she can be proud when we meet helps me stay away from negative thoughts.
• It’s surprisingly easily to blindly fall into depression and it soon it feels “normal”. • Write a gratitude list. • Do something kind to help someone else. • When I’m overwhelmed w household chores, so I invite a friend to sit w me and chat as I work. • Eat a healthy hearty breakfast which is positive fuel for the brain. • Set a regular time w a friend(s) for a power walk and chat. • In one sitting eat a quart of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Kidding! Ha • Shower with scented soaps.
What habits help you deal with depression?
One habit that's a lot more difficult but super helpful to me whenever I can stick to it is to wash the dishes in the evening. It's a nice quiet end to my day (mindfulness :)), it makes me feel like I've accomplished something and it makes it a million times easier to eat breakfast in the morning. Also, the habit makes it easier to do the next day as well because I only ever have to wash the few dishes of this one day.
Picking up all the cat toys off the floor. Cause there's so many lol it makes a difference in how clean the house looks. And watching motivational vids like this one. Nothing shaming or harsh with high expectations that feel like a quantum leap from where I currently am. Just looking for smaller actions that are within my reach atm
My main go to is painting. It keeps me out of my head.
@@imaginareality It's a great habit to have and one I really dislike doing myself. But what helps is I either rewatch episodes of my fav TV shows while I wash dishes or I watch a fun TH-cam video.
@@j40389 Love it and happy to be part of your healthy habit!
I have Major Depressive Disorder and have been lying in bed every day till about 3:00pm. Today I cleaned out my kitty's litter box & put in fresh litter & swept the bathroom floor. I take better care of her than myself. After watching this wonderful video, I'm going to force myself to take a shower.😊
I'll join you-so to speak.
The Sun and walking is important. Before you get depressed, get some sunshine and Vitamin D, then a walk or dance or stretch but you have to get the endorphins. Then read or listen to music and see if it helps. Medication may be adjusted or changed or needed
I've been in bed for 5 days. Quit my job due to bullying. This is hard.
Would you like the only true cure?
Aw I wanna give u a hug… get u outta ur house and take a walk in the park. Dont rely on others. Do it yourself and I’ll feel better. Get urself outta bed. Be ur own best friend
I struggle to get out of bed every single day...and most days I lose the battle. It's now 5 pm and I'm still in bed. Everything is black. The pain is unbearable. I no longer know where to turn. I don't have money for treatment and I struggle every day with thoughts of suicide, even though I am familiar with the devastation it leaves in its wake. I've struggled with depression for 53 years now and I feel soooooo alone and broken and damaged from it all. This has helped me to write it down.
🪴
Jesus is close to the broken- hearted. Let those words sink in , ask Him to help you understand, reach out to him even if just a small reach out.
@@Pecan27304 thank you
@@urzsulaz2604 thank you
I am sending a message out to the universe to help ease your pain. noone deserves to feel this way. i hope you keep looking for solutions here on youtube. they are good resources for free. I hope you find peace and inner happiness some day soon
1. Clean
2. Go outside
3. Interact with a living being( people, pets, nature)
4. Complete one tiny task
5. Treat yourself- shower, sing, buy flowers, draw, etc
Buy flowers? 🤡
@@DingDong-lh4ixfor the wife. Happy wife = happy life😂
@@rafdegreve 🤣
Easier said than done when alot of people feel like death every day
But what's the point ? I guess you don't understand what depression is
Going outside at least once a day truly makes a world of difference, especially if you work at home
Not when you live in a bad neighbourhood. I really have to pick time slots and even then Im sometimes too anxious and/or too tired to go outside in those timeframes. Im fine having my windows open for fresh air but no need to go outside that much. Its a luxury to me to be able to stay inside and have everything delivered anyway 😂
where do you live. I was on 7 mile in detroit last week. Only white guy within miles and guess what. Everyone I ran into were cool. I wouldn't do that at night.
@@ARS-fn6px you can always find an excuse if you want one.
It is absolutely necessary.
How do you get a job working from home? I'm envious of the people who have one.
Something that has helped me is calling the depression out for what it is. In my support network, if I'm around them, I will say "I've dipped" and that is understood by those close to me, to mean "I am feeling hopeless/ out of it/ down/ unmotivated etc". And that's when we will start do some healthy habits (many mentioned in this video).
Another thing, a tough pill to swallow was accepting motivation would only come from action and not vise versa. So I've been working for years to change the way my mindset when it comes to my depressive episodes. A therapist once told me "depression is the overwhelming feeling of hopelessness". Take that with a pinch of salt, but it's helped me reframe in those "dips". It's sitting with those negative thoughts and countering them. For everytime the thought pops into my head (here's some examples) "this is never going to end" to "it did last time" or "what's the point in anything" to "I don't need to know the answer right now, but we can find it later" etc. It's about being kind to myself and accepting my brain, body etc sometimes has an unvoluntary off switch. And finding these things, habits, people who can remind me there is still a switch and it'll turn back on eventually.
Last thing that has really helped me get out of the guilt spiral which often happens during or after a depressive episode- generally, we are alot kinder to loved ones than we are ourselves. For every thought or feeling you have about your situation/ depression, imagine it's coming from a loved one. How would you respond to what they're saying? What comfort or advice would you give? Now, say that to yourself because you deserve to love yourself as much as you love those around you.
Obviously, I'm not a professional and I'm just sharing some lil things I've picked up along the way. I've struggled with mental health issues for the best part of ten years. It's only in recent years I've been able to start implementing healthy habits along the way. It was really tough at first. But the more practice I put into it, the easier it got. I hope this helps someone to know mental health isn't something you "get over" or "win the battle of"- it's something you can learn to live with and still be successful in things you want (family relations, career, school, being happy etc). Enough essay writing😂 hope you're all okay!
Thank you so much for sharing your experience and advice!!!
Thankyou for your content😊
thank you for sharing this. really helpful❤️
Great post. Peace and love
Extremely helpful; thank you
So refreshing to hear a therapist talk about their depression so openly. Thank you for being brave
There is one thing that really worked for me - workout. Lifting weights helps me a lot. And the mere fact that I can physically change myself had a huge impact on my life. Try it. The best way to fight weakness is strength!
What you describe is a mild depression not a severe one. Trust me a severe one is not about bad mood, it’s about wanting to disappear 😢
Having said that all good advice. I think cold showers, hardcore exercises , talking to people, hyperventilating work too
Yup the struggle is real! Good tips
I feel like the intensity is about the same. The problem is when it happens more often than not.
Eventually the depression with cause such disruption in your life that you now have stuff to be really depressed about.
No, what he is giving is science based information that alleviates ALL kinds of dépression. Which is on a sliding scale. No one is special for suffering more.
Some people embrace suffering, suggesting that it means that they are more sensitive, but refuse to do Anything to help themselves.
Everything that he suggested is science based. Exercise has the équivalent value to prosac. Simply getting up Can make a difference. Failure to do basic hygiene diminishes you.
Rewatch. Sounds like you need to.
Yeah..I hve MDD+SEVERE ANXIETY and I know what you mean..I empathize
I hv MDD+SEVERE ANXIETY..and I know wht you mean..I empathize..smh
I’ve been blindsided by depression and I feel I’m falling deeper and deeper. I will not admit to anyone I’m struggling and I will not ever ask for help. I can look at myself from a third person perspective and think, “what is wrong with you, you need help”…. Ugh, I just have to fix this myself !!!
I know these very things you mention help as I’ve had a few days I could do one or two but making myself do them is like pulling teeth and yet I don’t know why…..this is NOT me !!! I never have skimped on hygiene, it was a priority, now if I shower, wash my hair, brush my teeth and get dressed I feel I’ve done a days work……what, how can I feel like this ??? I have no desire to do anything, even things I love to do. I’m hoping it’s just menopause and it will pass because I want me back but can’t find her !!!!
Update?🩷
How are you feeling today. I hope you are feeling much better ❤
I feel almost the same as you described, though it is not related to menopausal thing. But at the age 65 onwards you are back to square one taking care of loved ones all by yourself managing each and every task needed to care for your husband for years and years and it seems no end to getting "cancer is gone and you are cured" news, one feels so dejected that when I can enjoy my days after my retirement with my husband and visit my sons families? I am tied up to home only unless going out for medical appointments, getting medical prescriptions and/or groceries. No social life of our Indian community whatsoever in this small town! Not complaining about taking care of my ill husband, I do it with total devotion, but certainly never expected that we will have to go through such harsh and hard time!
Hope you are managing to get help if that's what you need.
I hear you. I just want my life back.
Best video on depression I’ve ever seen - succinct, honest and easy to achieve tactics. Can’t thank you enough.
I had been seriously depressed for months and couldn't get out of it. I saw this video and said to myself, What the heck, why not? I picked one tiny task that even didn't take a minute. (I watered a wilting plant). The next day I did that twice. I broke the overwhelming sink full of dishes into "wash one cup". I did it each day. I kept doing little things, like not taking a shower, just washing my face. until one sunny day I had enough energy to do two tiny things. The more I kept doing little things, the more I felt like I must be getting a little better. And I did. And I didn't even blame myself for not doing everything. It wasn't fast, but slowly each day was a little better instead of the same depression. Slowly I did more and more little things until I was acting and feeling almost normal. I'm not quite back to normal, but I'm enough normal to go to bed feeling like I did some good things. Thanks much more than one word.
Try a sad lamp if weather effects your mood
not gonna lie, i read that as "watered a willing plant" and my idiot self was like "do plants want consent now?" LOL
Thank you Dr. Ali! I LITERALLY achieved my PhD One minute at a time! with many of the same techniques. There is a terrible Adam Ant vampire movie that is clearly about addiction, but my favorite part is that it turns out the cure for vampirism... is to just start being a human again... just start eating good food and sleeping like a human... Everytime I feel myself slipping into the pit, I remind myself to just go through the motions until it happens, just start acting like a human and I will turn it around.
I'm not kidding you! During the last few months of writing my dissertation, my todo list was Monday:take book off shelf, Tuesday: put book on desk, Wednesday: open book, Thursday: find topic, Friday: Read one page... It really is just doing one thing until action triggers motivation
Omg I want to see that movie! Love that explanation and as someone who really struggled to finish my dissertation I totally get it. Congratulations!!!
And I am reading this during writing my PhD dissertation and thinking to quit after 8 years from struggling 😅
I agree with you, I suffered with this and social anxiety ,undiagnosed for more than two decades while self medicating with alcohol and fighting depression,I fixed myself in the end by going for a walk,Just being among people stopped me from feeling so alone and I found that I would have moments of clarity,My mum asked me to build her a table so I reoccupied my mind and planned the build of this table down to the last detail,I obsessed about every detail,bought the tools and materials needed and just built it because the blueprint was in my head,find something you used to enjoy be it cooking or being creative and make it happen,The walking and better choices will help you lose weight and improve your self image.Find a purpose learn a skill and get up and move forward.
This is excellent advice. I only wish I had the money for a hobby. But good job. What's your next project?
When you have depression like I do your house is probably really dirty and cluttered, it's so cluttered that you don't even know where to begin cleaning? Set a timer for 10 minutes and clean until that timer goes off. Do that everyday and before you know it your house will be clean.
When you have anxiety along with depression, it becomes much worse to overcome it. Hopefully this helps.
How did you go?
Update ?
Try fish oil, vitamin D, vitamin B12, and sunshine. For anxiety try a supplement called Less Stress or Buh-Bye Stress. Chamomile tea or Passionflower tea helps my anxiety. Wishing you all the luck and prayers for your recovery. Try talking to God sometimes if you believe in that sort of thing. Helps me feel better. Hopefully I didn't offend you. I just want you to feel better.💛🕊️ Peace.
Same i have both depression n anxiety n it’s so hard to pretend to be okay coz nobody understands you n your problem. Instead of support people think that i m exaggerating, overthinking n worrying too much however this is not at all the case with being depressed n anxious.
@@rifsanahusain6116same with me no one can understand you better than you, people even friends think you're exaggerating & that's make me feeling worse trying to explain n defend myself.
I’ve seen many vids from trained professionals giving advice but I’d say yours is the most helpful.
Depression often goes hand in hand with overwhelm and sometimes, one minute is all you can accomplish without, yet again, feeling like a failure. 👍
I'm 60 (retired) and in a dark hole for 4 years now (realized it started as deep sadness, so I'll see your other video after this 😁), just starting to come out, getting more balanced emotionally using a lot of these things you've mentioned. It's a struggle every single day and it's been hard and a long haul (my dr suggested it might also be from aging and/or menopause, but that's been 10 yrs now) but it IS getting slightly easier and more "good" moments happening (phew!). I appreciate this video, thank you; you really do have to feel the lows and then work on it as often as possible - it does get easier. I now set an alarm in the morning so i don't sleep too long (which makes me feel like I'm wallowing or wasting my time), get out of bed and do my personal cleaning, do makeup and hair and get out of my pajamas into "ready for the day" or "ready to go out" clothes (i plan the next day - a very simple easy one - just b4 bed). Makes a big difference, it is 99% of the time, so it's starting to become a habit. Just sharing. Thanks!
Hi... did depression come after retirement?...
@@klanderkal Hm. Hard to say. I retired just before the-virus-that-must-not-be-named hit us in March. Maybe. We had planned to travel etc but got a whole other bunch of problems and issues instead, and too much thinking as we both research everything. 😆I am trying to balance my research, knowledge, and live a good life despite it all now. 🙂
This is so good to read. Bravo. 👍Day by day, step by step. ❤️
Many of the things you have described (examples sitting in your pajamas, not taking a shower) convince me that you know exactly what you were talking about. I believe most of your advice in this video would be beneficial. So now I am wondering, why do I feel overwhelmed by these things that could help, and why do I feel more depressed, but I am not able to easily do these things when I once could. it was harder to watch this video than I expected instead of feeling motivated I feel more of a failure. These things may not actually be enough to make a difference anymore. I still want to say thank you. I hope I can watch this again when my mind is ready. 👍👏👏👏
For me getting out in nature is the best. Going down to the river in winter and taking my shoes off and walking in the river up to my knees.
Or showing my dog affection and taking her down to the park for a walk.
This is great! I clicked on the video half-expecting a list of habits that feel overwhelming and impossible to implement and to then start crying in despair. You know, the usual advice we tend to get: excercise for 30 minutes every day, get up every day at around the same time in the morning, stick to a balanced diet etc.. (Only yesterday I read an article on how to make decisions when depressed - something I struggle with a lot - and one of the tips was to meal prep for the entire week. Sure, it feels almost impossible to take a can of soup, dump it into a pot and eat it but let me just plan ten meals real quick.) Instead, this advice is actually helpful and there are a few things that I already try to do. Like going outside, even just walking to the mailbox and back.
So happy to hear you found this validating. Even when I am at my 1000% best, I still can't do meal prep for the entire week! 🤣
Boy you are spot on! I just saw a video where the guy said exercise for 30 days 5 days a week. Ain't gonna happen! They tell you exercise rejuvenates you. WRONG. It tires you out, makes your body sore and sweat. If does nothing positive for me. And just look at the person recommending this - he's always slim and probably is into fitness. The average person in NOT!
So true. Lately I leave gum near my bed for days I can't be asked to brush my teeth. When bad..to even get a cup tea feels like climbing Mt Everest. Sometimes extreme hunger is only thing that forces me out to the shops. Then it lifts ..just on its own like a cloud. I've found sometimes I just have to submit and sit it out...
You can also try fish oil supplements and vitamin D, vitamin B1,and magnesium for anxiety and depression. Studies show that they worked for some people. 💛. Wishing and hoping you'll feel better soon! Hugs.
I cleaned my entire home and made my bed, got everything spotless last week, felt like something I never do. I was so comfortable and happy with it I didn't want to go to work for an entire week. I couldn't handle it, hard to understand.
I was 56 at the time. Was never prone to depression and never had a problem with the menopause, but i started feeling strange. My attitude was What's the point, all the time. It lasted 6 months.
I prayed about it and asked the Lord for healing. I had some Estrogen gel, just in case i needed it once i went into menopause. Never used it, since i didn't need it. It had already expired by then by a few years.
I was prompted to put some of it on my forearm soft skin. Went to bed and when i got up in the morning i felt great. I understood that was an answer to my prayer.
My estrogen was too low, 6 years into menopause. A few months later i recognised the What's the point symptome and applied it again. It worked and never came back again.
If you don’t mind me asking what cream or brand did you use?
Menopause effects many women so different. I wasn't prepared for all the pre years and follow up. It was over 10 years.. My mom didn't know or always stated she didn't have it.?? But in her family line there is overwhelming mental illness issues in women that started at the same age.. She even shared 2 more generations. We both swore we wouldn't be that way.. It still happened .. It does with education and more knowledge on medications and different life effects became more treatable with every generation. But I'm blessed to get this info
I feel like these are great for people who feel occasionally depressed. But when u wake up in this state i dont know how u could ever do this.
People can try them for a week, one each day and see. If they get some relief, they can extend time outside, exercise, or cleaning etc. They can also see a counselor, get evaluated for meds, talk to a priest, change diet and maybe supplement professional help with this DIY anti-depression kit.
@@paulmccarthy7461 I mean sure but like I said when u wake up with the level of depression I experience I promise you they can't do any of these. An achievement is getting out of bed to use the bathroom or speaking. I hope others get something from this tho 🙏
@@nicholaslogan5185I am truly sorry for your struggle with severe depression. Maybe a low dose of Suboxone would help you. It did for me. Also fish oil supplements and vitamin D and B1! At this point ,you need to take some kind of action to fight back against it so you can have a better quality of life. Wishing you happiness and speedy recovery. Really hope that you know that these are science backed remedies. X
@@nicholaslogan5185 I agree with you. Some people have real depression and they are not gonna be able to drag themselves out of the pit of darkness and pain to go for a walk. I thank God for Prozac every day and over the years I have learned the right dosage. But I am still very vigilant to avoid triggers as much as possible.
Action leads to motivation, counter-intuitive but it's the truth and beyond important to grasp. Thanks for sharing Dr. Ali!
The first thing I do in the morning, I make my bed, that helps me feel less depressed. I got two anti-depressents, Seroquel and a tabby cat I named Margie, after my mom.
Thank you so much, really. Struggling with depression right now, I love that your advices are quite low-threshold and realistic.
Sometimes you feel even more like a 'failure' when someone expect you to do 'big' activities which you can't, so it's great to see that it's really not about that big activities at all.
I’m all about making some SMALL changes that can have a BIG impact over time.
I love the fact you raised male postpartum depression. It is a real thing and no one talks about it.
I agree. Both my son and daughter-in-law went through it after the birth of my grandson. They'd both been looking forward to becoming parents, but she had a dreadful pregnancy, followed by a harrowing birth, and then 2 years of surgeries and health scares, before my grandsons health stabilised and they knew he was going to be OK. For my daughter in law, it took another year for her to get the help she needed, but it was refused to my son, as it wasn't considered a male problem. Fortunately, his wife was able to help him through the help she was getting, and they both feel fine and are enjoying life with each other, but it makes me wonder, how many men just get beaten down without getting the help they need. And how many marriages break up because of it. It is about time that it is understood that men's emotions and mental health can be damaged too!
One household trick which really helped me, using the tactic of breaking tasks down, has been taking the dread out of refrigerator blues by cleaning just one shelf or drawer at a time. I don't need so much counter space to put yhings. It does'nt even matter if I don't do another shelf the next day. It's better than it was. Also, vacuuming just part of the house. I have a small house, so I do either the upstairs or downstais. I used to think I had to complete every task. I'm over that now, and it really helped
Before black hole
Action leads to motivation
1 minutes achivement
Develope habit
Notice thoughts
Clean in a minute
Reward yourself in a minute
Interact with a living one in a minute
Go outside or walk for a minute
Check off one thing..one minute achivement/ completion
Depression hits me in winter. SAD, & I have full spectrum light. Every year, like clockwork. Thx tips!
Do you take vitamin D?
I have the EXACT same thing. Clockwork. It took me a few years to see the pattern. If you, by any chance, know of an online support group for SAD, please post a reply comment. By the way, I often get off my anti-depressants (successfully) for the summer, and get back on them again in enough time before the time changes. That has helped me alot.
Starts at 4:18:
1) Clean
2) Go outside
3) Interact with one living thing
4) Complete one task
5) Treat yourself
You're amazing! I'm having a hard time with depression, and I'm so happy that your suggestions are manageable and do-able. It's so easy to feel like a failure when you need to be doing massive amounts of stuff. It's quite freeing to realize that it's the little things that can make the most impact ♥
Thank you, Dr. Ali! Excellent video. I suffer from depression and anxiety. I will try your 5 points. I struggle often times to get off my couch and get going. At times, I feel great, and other times, I struggle to do little things.
When I get in a bad state, there are two kind of silly things I do before I even actually *do* anything about it. I sing “Put One Foot In Front of the Other” from the old Santa Claus claymation movie where the Warlock is learning how to walk and it melts his frozen exterior. It’s upbeat, catchy, and is quite literally about how a single physical step can lead more positive things. The second thing is I say “inch by inch” to myself. My throwing coach used to say that because I would get reeaallly upset that I wasn’t making big progress (like the crying breakdown kind of upset, it was an issue lol). It’s easy to get frustrated and demotivated when you’re in the black hole with tasks piled all around you, but I just hear his voice in my head reminding me that any progress is progress and it stops the doom spiral in my brain so I can focus on what the next step is.
That's so weird*! I* play that song* in my head too*, from the Christmas* Claymation* film*!*!*!* 💫😇🙌❤️✨☄️✨👞✨❄️☃️🌲
This is great. So useful... and funny. Thank you. ❤️
I find it useful to watch videos on You Tube about depression especially people’s personal accounts. I begin to feel less isolated and also empathy towards the person.
Also on my computer mindlessly eliminating documents n photos I don’t need.
Good luck everyone 🚀
It's a relief to hear someone who isn't pushing medication and drugs for depression like 99% of American doctors and therapists do.
It's a relief to hear someone like you who is shaming people who need medication because they have REAL chronic depression, and not temporary sadness. Oh wait, no, relief is not the right word at all.
@@iExploder Most people don't actually need meds. The pharmaceutical industry has fooled society and medical professionals into thinking they need it in order to turn a huge profit. It's a trillion dollar industry.
Yes I know and somtimes meds don't even work all I have to say is real happiness comes from within ❤ from Diane God bless you 💓🙏
@@dianeamaral8151 True. Thanks.
And I left a reply to the previous person about how most people don't need the meds but the meds are just a way for greedy big pharmaceutical companies to turn a buck.
Seems TH-cam deleted my reply. Go figure.
he is not shaming anybody, he is saying that drugs aren't always the answer@@iExploder
This depression started a few years ago. Nothing seemed to work since my ex husband cheated and left me. I didn’t trust my own judgement as he seemed so different than who he turned out to be. I made new friends but could never trust another man again. Things have gone from sad to worst and I’ve made so many efforts … but now especially since the pandemic. I feel hopeless and stuck in a pleasures-less life where nothing gives me 5:33 joy. I’m tired now.
I like the black hole and rocket analogy. I was doing all of this and then some, but sometimes you just wake up into depression, like it doesn't even have a triggering event, and the habits just all go out the window because you're already in the black hole, there's no powering a rocket in there it's just crushed already.
I find it more validating to acknowledge what you said: that you can't even see a trigger (but there probably is one even though you aren't aware of it) than to say "wash the dishes and you'll feel better". Yes, washing the dishes WILL make you feel better. The problem is that you are too depressed to summon the rational person inside of you. If someone validates my pain by UNDERSTANDING that I am IN PAIN, that will likely often be the catalyst by which I can start feeling better and do these great suggestions.
Finally am not the only one going through this
I thought it was only me😢
Me too...
@@fathbalbar I am so sorry that you thought you were the only one. If you find a website forum for people suffering from depression, you might feel more validated (and better as a result). I am not in a forum for depression, however, I am in a forum for HSP (highly sensitive people) who often suffer from depression due to their sensitivity to triggers and it helps a lot when there is someone who understands what you are going through. It is especially good for you if YOU can offer some comfort to another suffering person.
Me too......
I love the 5..go outside so right. It helps to naturally look outward and not inward exclusively. My teen can stay in a room (box) all day horizontal and screen staring. When i say you need to go outside he says ..why? Scary..
For me the key to ease depressive phases is to be a little productive. Write an idea (just five sentences); or play the base guitar; continue a thing that you (by your own reasons) should do. It doesn't really matter how much time I invest in those things (five minutes (or one minute, however I wasn't wet so deep in depression) or two hours), afterwards I always feel a tiny bit better, in the way of: at least I have done somthing purposeful.
Thank you for this video... I am just now starting to get over depression and anxiety which caused me to be unable to fall asleep, leading me to more horrible thoughts and the vicous cycle raged on.. I especially love number 5.. there are so many things you can do to treat yourself and I plan on doing all of them you mentioned.. Again, thank you so much for this most amazing video...
My depression was so much worse than most of this. I felt sick and nauseous all the time. Incapable of feeling ANY happiness. Could not eat, or barely sleep. Finally I got the right medicine, it was the only thing that worked.
Such good tips that do help me. The hardest is going outside cause anxiety about other people but it really turns things around for a bit to place yourself in a different environment. So appreciated your vulnerability about your own struggles, too. I feel slightly less silly about rage crying over small things now lol
Glad the video resonated with your experience. Something I remind myself is we are all human. We have similar software. So if I am experiencing something, every other human also has the capacity for feeling the same thing. It’s just a matter of our unique biology, environment, and experience that lead to more or less of these thoughts and emotions.
reminds me of the saying 'the more personal, the more universal' thanks for your humility brother ❤
Thank you so much! Very nicely done. Quick and actionable. I’m active duty military and plan to share this video via social media with my soldiers.
This is the most helpful and hopeful thing I've ever heard. There's no doubt i was meant to come across this channel. ❤
So happy it helped in some way!
Thanks for this.
Really appreciate your openness and sincerity. You have clearly "been there".
I was such a mess at the beginning of the year that I didn't get around to buying a diary/planner for work until February. Having missed the boat, there was limited choice. In fact, there was only one. So I bought it and started adding stuff, and one of the features of this particular planner was that it had a section on each page with the heading "Habit tracker". So I started by writing a few habits I've let slip that I know help me; Yoga, Guitar, Duolingo, Walking, Getting out in the garden, playing a little footie, and doing something chakra related. I'm kind to myself, and will tick the box for two minutes of yoga in the shower, one Duo lesson, playing one song, walking 100 metres for the view at the top of the street, picking some fresh herbs for dinner, passing a ball with my son or playing some hacky with the kids I work with, or just holding some crystals.
I don't do each thing every day, but try to do some things most days, and some things I like to be able to tick even just once a week,
I'm on a 175 day Duo streak today, I do a little yoga each day - maybe just two or three minutes, and my guitar playing is getting back to where it was before I got really unwell; even written a few cathartic new songs. I get a buzz from ticking the boxes, and it has made me much more habit conscious, which you obviously know makes a big difference.
Don't normally leave comments on TH-cam, but I was moved by your genuineness, and just started typing.
Hope this helps to further validate your generous work, and in turn helps someone else out there. Also, hope you're keeping well and being that great Dad - it's the best thing in the world, right? On days when everything feels too much, I keep it simple and ask myself three questions; is my son happy? Is my son safe? Does my son know how much he's loved? The answers are always yes, and the time taken to think about it refocuses my silly brain and pushes all the clutter aside, refocusing on the only thing that really matters. I told him I've started doing this - he's 11 but a wise old soul, and I just know he's going to actively prompt me to check my three questions next time I'm on the downward spiral. And hopefully it's good modelling for him - he's a sensitive boy, a lot like me, and I know I need to keep an eye on him there, so there's a further practical reason to check in on his wellbeing.
Anyway, this has turned into quite the ramble, but will finish by saying that next year, when I get my new planner, the first thing I'll do is dedicate a space on each page for my habit tracker.
All the best from Aotearoa/New Zealand.
So true! If I wake up, sit on the sofa & turn on TH-cam, I'm done for!! I need to get in the habit of doing ANYTHING but that!!
This is good ❤ depression all life ,I am 62 now and still in the game of life peace out .have faith 💟😊. I like making faces 😮😢😊😊😊😊❤
🥰
Making other's smile/happier is one of my go to's.
I have been dealing with really bad depression and suicidal ideations for quite some time now but I am all about homeopathic healing. I have many ways of helping myself through it even though I struggle beyond sometimes too🙏 I love to lift other's up even if it's just making fun of myself and them smiling out loud😁🤪 I don't have any kind of personal life at all no family or friends but I when I'm around other's even if just at the grocery store I end up feeling so much better afterwards most of the time because bringing Sunshine into other people's lives especially when I'm feeling my worst vicariously helps me feel better if not just for that moment😌🙏💐✌️
Doc, I just found your channel and you have hit “depression” by definition for me perfectly! These techniques are all very true! Not complicated…exactly what a depressed person needs.
I’m depressed however hovering up and down, (guilt for no reason, small panic attacks etc.) these are great tools that I can use in my tool box. All of these skills will create that small light in the dark void that allows you understand there is hope to eventually get out of this depressed state. Thank you Dr.
At 56 I raised 3 sons and there dad did much better once we were divorced.. I think it is inspiring how this dad is so much into hos children's life. Many men have depression but in my experience in my younger days many women always felt we had 3 HUGE jobs.. It was just society. I do know 2 of my sons are very much part of their baby daughters life.. VERY involved and I love it.thanjs
Cleaning your house/space does help alot. Get up, shower, do some laundry, clean up... It will help
1. Go for long walks
2. Get morning sunlight and take vitamin d
3. Sleep early
4. Watch a lot of comedy
Scary movies too. They make you feel!
Your description of depression and how to deal with it in terms of your habits is so accurate and spot on! I deal with major depressive disorder and your advice on this video is extremely helpful.
You keep talking about going outside going outside going outside well it’s not that easy first you gotta get up then you gotta get dressed the heck with it I’m going back to bed. This guy seems to want to help the depression but you got a really understand it to help us get over depression, and so far you’re one idea out of five or six were pretty good and it’s up to any of you guys to pick up one that I picked. Have yourself a good day.
Try some fish oil supplements and vitamins D and B1. They are proven to ease symptoms of depression. You could also consider low dose Suboxone for treatment resistant depression. It really helps me. I hope you're able to feel better soon. A big hug to you friend. Wishing you all the luck and happiness.
Dude you have several things going on … Anger and negativity which feed your depression. All can be fixed, if interested how just ask.
I don't find some of these replies to be validating at all which will probably mean they make you feel worse rather than better. What you might need is someone who understands the type of pain you are in and the feeling of being understood often helps lift the veil of pain. I hope you feel better.
this is one of the most honest vidieos i have ever seen your advice holds much merit. thank you...
A good diet and exercising is always a good start; listening to feel good music works as well.
I need to watch you more. Haven’t showered in a month, don’t care. I do use soap clothes that to don’t require rinse and body wipes. I have chronic pain from back issues and so out of shape, if I shower, it wears me out for the day. I don’t know what a routine is anymore.
Journal positive accomplishments and things r grateful for
This is an excellent tool. Sometimes you must rack your brain to come up with three things a day for which you are grateful. Don't forget about clean water and having the willpower to get up today. Don't take things for granted and after a while this will have a positive affect on your brain.
That really helped . I did not know in the first place I I was feeling so shitty today for no reason . Thank you so much dr Ali . ❤
Thank you, trying to climb out from this black hole and having 5 things to do will help me make a start
Thank you for you being so honest about your own challenges after the birth of your child. Not many men speak about this as the focus is mostly on women. Love these amazing times. Small and manageable ❤
You healed mild depression. For us suffering hard depression....
Bravo!
Excellent. I completely relate. These tips seem so obvious but when you are depressed all it feels so so difficult.
You should try fish oil supplements,they are proven to help with anxiety and depression. Also vitamin D and B1 and magnesium. I had such severe depression that I went on Suboxone for treatment resistant depression. It helps me some. I hope you find some of my suggestions helpful.💛🕊️. Wishing you peace and happiness.
I so appreciate how you integrate your own personal sharing into your relevant tips. Your channel has been an inspiration to me in so many ways, and your authenticity as a therapist is a big one. Congrats on your littles! I'm in a similar phase of life. The struggle to shower is real!
Action leads to motivation. So true. Often I start the week with a big ugggh! Questioning what Im doing with my life then by Friday Im grateful for sticking it out, I have plenty of money for all necessities & I feel healthy & much more well emotionally. Its he stillness that creeps up & becomes malignant. I often just listen to ppl when I get into a funk. There are LOTS of problems & lots of suffering out there. Its not just me in fact its just about everyone. Sometimes after taking in all of my coworkers problems I just say to myself I really have no problems & Im grateful. Not many can say this. A relationship would be welcome though.😊
Good advice considering I’m depressed and have always tried to tackle things all or nothing when I’m normal.
It’s good to concede and just realize/approach tasks in terms of baby steps vs not getting out of bed.
Enough horrible days will pass.
Thank you for your tips. They really help. I’ve been struggling with depression recently and it can be overwhelming. Your ideas are simple and effective. Best wishes to everyone dealing with this.
Hope you're feeling better!
I can’t go out thanks to irresponsible dog owners who’s dogs are aggressive where I live. It’s making me profoundly depressed. My local council aren’t helping. I spend my days creating. I so agree with everything you’ve said
Thank you for this video, Dr. Ali. Really good tips. Having these be 1-min things is so much easier and makes it less overwhelming. Thank you. 💗
Glad it was helpful!
Thank you for this Dr. Ali! One habit that I've recently started that has been helping is to attend at least one mental health peer support group a week. A therapist recommended DBSA to me, and it's been very encouraging so far.
So appreciate this video, especially this time of year! I will definitely be sharing this information with my patients ☺️
Thank YOU for your kind comment!
❤ Dear Doctor Mattu,
if you hoped to make at least a small difference with your video, I'd like you to know that it did!
Your brave and generous way of sharing first hand experience AND applicable advice speaks a lot to me! It inspired me to get up and brush my teeth now. 🙈 Later I'll get a work related thing done, that is also only in my best interest! 🌻👍 I'm already looking forward to the feeling of accomplishment!
I wish you, your family and friends the best! Thank you 🌻
I live in 500 Unit High Rise and I'm a pretty happy person, but I notice if I get in a little bit of a funk the minute I walk outside through my Park and interact with people I feel better. Plus the Gym is my drug. A nice work-out with various machines gets my juices flowing and a trip to Steam Room helps.
The gym and healthy eating (nutriologist) I can say cured my depression and anxiety
Loved all his recommendations. I think keeping busy definitely helps. Didn't realize I do most of these things already. Could probably work on going outside more. He seemed like a real person. Didn't realize guys could also get postpartum. Interesting stuff
Cuddle with a stuffie is my favorite. Finally a doctor I feel I can trust because you are sharing what your experience has been and what has worked for you. And these are action based solutions to use, not medicine to take every day with side effects to deal with which only adds to my anxiety and depression. But don't get me wrong. Sometimes for some people medication may be a solution that you may need and could work. Thank you for this video. Very useful. Like, subscribed and bell.❤
I like your reply because you acknowledge that while cuddling helps you, there are others with severe depression who may need meds. Bless you for your understanding.
John 14:27 Peace 🌈 I leave with you; my peace I give you😀. I do not give to you as the world 🌍 gives. Do not let your hearts face-red-heart-shape be troubled and do not be afraid.
❤ Thanks a lot, Dr. Ali! This really helps! I immediately started, feel much better! Will do more and more of it. Warm greetings from germany! ❤
Dear sir.. Could you please make a video on how to manage mood swings caused by periods.
It sometimes make me take things personally and make me feel even more sad
Anhedonia is not wanting to do things , its inability to get satisfaction out of things you do or listen or watch.
So behavioural activation is only really good for avolition. That is what not wanting to do things.
It even actually feels worse to force yourself to do things when you are seriously feeling bad and have anhedonia.
Man I’m to the point where I almost wish I remembered how it felt to actually cry. I’ve been in this hole so long I don’t even cry about it anymore. Feels sometimes like my life is just completely void of any genuine emotion anymore.
Same. I need a hug.
Try to shift into anger.
@@normal5389🫂
Move your body. The energy in your body can't flow when you don't move your body. That stagnant energy needs to get going. Hence the tip to jump up and down.
Try to shower every day. Visualise that every drop of water that lamds on your body is a mini energy injection.
Also visualise that the soapy water you rinse of is your depressed state. See it leaving down the drain.
Visualise yourself in a feel good state. Visualisation is a powerful tool.
You can get of the that black hole. I've been there myself.
Life isn't pointless.
We've all lived many lives prior to this one. Robert Schwartz book Your soul's plan might be a game changer if you can read with your heart instead of your mind.
Suerte friends.
Much love to you ❤
Ive watched quite a few vids on fighting depression. THIS vid helped me. I could relate to it. Thank you.
I understand that I'm saposed to go for a walk and maybe set up my drums today or pick up my guitar. Consistency and discipline are what i want most of all.
Need a three minute version of this.
Why is #1 at minute 4?
Sunlight, especially in the early morning.
Thank you doctor. This made a lot of sense. I have struggled with habits for years....and I always thought it was because of my depression. But, habits can actually motivate me to get back on track ' emotionally '........I really really hope.
The world has closed in on me. I have had several years of pain and immobility, lost both my parents, my support dog, and my eldest son (42) has terminal cancer. he will leave an eleven year old grandson. My partner has become distant, unco-operative, obstructive, sleeps on the sofa in the lounge, having worked until the early hours so I spend 95% of my time coping, or trying to, with being cold, not getting a decent sleep due to discomfort, pain and worry. I've treid to do my hobbies but drugs they've put me on mean poor concentration. I love things constantly. I can't garden any more (was my go to) and am only keeping going to support my sons. I can't see a way out of my situation or my circumstances. I've been battling with this new home for a year, and can't afford to move out. what's left to try?
My son is an alcoholic. Has Stage 4 liver failure. He lives in NZ. I live in row UK My other son has declared he never wants to speak to me again. I’m pretty low. Thanks for your advice. Mary from England
I have to say....showering is one of the first things I stop doing when life becomes overwhelming and depressing. Cleaning my house is the next, and I fall into clutter. TMS has helped me at least want to deal with things. Self soothing has become a debt problem for me, and wasting a lot of time on TH-cam has become a mental distrubance too, I believe
So sorry. I hope you can do one nice thing for yourself while you are waiting to feel better. I hope you are not isolated. Sometimes when we're depressed we want to be isolated even though it is a sad feeling to think we're alone.
Hello, how many of these one minute activities should I force myself to do each day in order to help the depression? Thank you.
So true… I exercise before I do any compulsive eating. It helps me now wait until I’m actually hungry to eat
That you referenced Star Trek “Trouble with Tribbles”, made your thoughts and ideas more meaningful for me!! I’m suffering all you are talking about and I’m grateful for your insight.
Telling people who have a hard time doing things to just do things? Genius dude 🤯
Have another listen to his video
Life is hard, I haven’t seen my daughter since covid . Ex has taken my child and overseas law doesn’t support to see my kid. Luckily I have great job/career, working long hours, hitting gym everyday, lifting weights and thinking good for my daughter so she can be proud when we meet helps me stay away from negative thoughts.
stay positive, my friend! There will be a time, when you will reunite with your daughter.
Cleaning is definitely therapeutic. Even if you just accomplish clearing out one small space. It is a positive act and a step forward.
Face , Accept, Float , and let time pass by. , it worked for me !
• It’s surprisingly easily to blindly fall into depression and it soon it feels “normal”.
• Write a gratitude list.
• Do something kind to help someone else.
• When I’m overwhelmed w household chores, so I invite a friend to sit w me and chat as I work.
• Eat a healthy hearty breakfast which is positive fuel for the brain.
• Set a regular time w a friend(s) for a power walk and chat.
• In one sitting eat a quart of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Kidding! Ha
• Shower with scented soaps.
So true. Good list. Thank you.
Good..advices 🙏