I think that, from all the psych2go videos that I've watched, this is the one that I needed the most. Glad I found it. I've been ignoring the sexual abuse that I suffered in childhood for years, and now I'm finally doing the work to unpack the feelings and understand how it impacts my life.
You are such a strong person🩵🫂 It takes a lot of strength to take that on and open those memories we all tried so hard to forget. Sending all my love your way, and I pray you can find your peace❣️
I've been struggling with the effects of being SA'd by my ex brother in law when I was about 14. . I'm so depressed and angry about how this damaged me and my life. What bothers me most is that it effed me up so much that it inadvertantly and negatively affects my two teens. I still am full of self hatred and shame. I thought I'd put this all away but I was triggered about three years ago. I found out that my mom ( who I was super close and enmeshed with) new all along what had happened to me so many years ago and did nothing about it. Never once asked me if I was ok. Never told my dad ( my hero) I didn't know she knew all along and when I found out it broke me and brought it all back. I felt betrayed and so hurt and shocked. It changed my relationship with my mom. She's almost 92 now. There was nothing I could do or say. I couldn't hold her accountable she's too old and I know she didn't intend to hurt me. I think about it every day and try to figure out why I'm so dysfunctional still. I'm 58 and it's killing me on the inside. No one ever acknowledged what happened to me and that hurts as much or more than the actual SA. I absolutely cannot manage my emotions . Im silently full of anger. Thanks for letting me vent.
@@nancyayotte2297I hear you. I'm dealing with my own issues and I seem to be surrounded by people dealing with their own SA. It is very hard to talk about. When people get triggered they tend to just drift away in shame. 💜
Sexual assault is so hard to talk about, it’s caused me to be hyper sexual at a very very young age. It also caused me to still be hesitant to anyone and everyone. Anytime I would have any sexual intimacy I would have a breakdown, I would have uncontrollable anxiety attacks and shut down. It’s easier now, but I’m in therapy and I am doing my best to get help. It’s hard but it’s possible, I believe in everyone to be able to find closure and peace, whether it happens now or later.
I became hyper aroused at an unnaturally young age as well. Thank you for sharing, I thought I was a pedo or something. No, I never assaulted anyone, but knowing I was sexual when I shouldn't even have noticed my intimate parts yet, yes that made me feel like a weirdo and a pedo. So, thank you for sharing.
I also became hyper aroused at an early age and break down during sexual activity. I think the worst part of being a victim in this situation is if you tell the wrong person about what happened, they’ll do it all over again. My ex did that to me and I haven’t dated anyone since. I’m keeping my eye out for a real man.
As a male who got SAed by my two female cousins who are sisters when I was a kid, I couldn't even remember how old I was when that happened cuz I just realized that I've been trying to forget about it and hide it deep down in my mind but no matter how hard I tried to forget, the flashbacks still haunts me. The first time that it happened is when the older cousin babysitted me along with my grandma. I couldn't remember where my parents and my sister are that time but I remember it was the three of us; me, my cousin, and my grandma. So the three of us are sleeping together in one bed and my cousin gave me a candy and SAed me while grandma is sleeping and told me to be quiet. The second time that it happened is when she was giving me a shower. I don't want to talk about it in full detail but yeah I still remember how it happened. The third SAed I experienced is with my cousin's younger sister who babysitted me as well. She took me in our guest room and it all happened there. For years that went by I felt alone and I didn't talk about it to anyone even with my parents nor my sister cuz I didn't know if they would believe me if I told them. Until we got to leave our country and live abroad when I was 17 and when I turned 18 that's when I told my mom everything that happened. All she did was cry while she listened to my stories. Now I'm 23 years old and I'm doing much better now but I'm still healing slowly day by day. It is not an easy thing to go through especially in childhood years. I wouldn't even expect to even share this online like even now I'm fighting my tears to type this story. I may forgive and heal but I can never forget that ugly and disgusting experience. It is just like a wound that heals but leaves you with an ugly scar. Edited: Thank you for the nice and uplifting comments❤️
I have no idea who you are but your story brought me to tears. You should have never experienced that and man I hope you heal and just flourish dude. You will get through this, I believe in you!
I understand and I'm so sorry you've suffered these wounds too. I send virtual feelings of support and solidarity from afar. I'm F 29, and have dealt with a number of instances from 5 to 26, the recent patches from the first partner I trusted to begin the process of physical intimacy. I stated clearly having trauma in those areas and needing to take things slowly, I blocked out for a year that he ignored me but didn't know why I was ever able to say no or enforce a line again until my memories came back. Once I remembered and talked through it he was really shocked that what he'd done was assualt and ended up sobbing because he realised he'd done that at some point in basically every relationship he'd had. I hope he got his head right and takes consent seriously, but I know I can't hold myself responsible for teaching people what consent is, they should care enough and understand the prevalence enough to self educate and communicate. If you have any issues with partners in the future, I want you to know that's fully on them. You deserve people who see your safety as sacred. I strongly recommend following some sex therapists on social media (the expansive group on insta has really helped me). You always deserved better and I'm very glad you're away from these people now. This is always serious and should never happen to any children or anyone.
I’m a gay guy that went through this at the hands of my 3 year relationship with a guy I thought was my world, he destroyed me in so many ways and left me to pick up the pieces Your suffering should never have been silenced and I’m so sorry you had to go through something like this-it breaks something and no matter what you do you always feel that crack deep down that you can’t fix, but you are a trooper, your still here alive and fighting, don’t repress these memories out of fear of judgement, sharing a problem halves it, trusted friends or family members or even strangers on the internet like you’ve done now-you’ve managed to come a long way and not let it define you it doesn’t define any of us. There are sadly just some terrible people in the world and they take advantage of weakness,kindness, trust and loyalty hold your head up high knowing you lived to tell your story and that your experience didn’t completely consume you. Keep hanging in there bud we got this shit
I don't remember my sexual assault, but I experienced it. I forgot it at a self-defense mechanism. I still have trauma, and I physically cannot bring myself to feel sexual desire for another person. Even if you don't remember, you are valid.
@@Ms.Delirious that's right! when you are around 2 to 3 years old (wil vary from person to person) everything before that age, you don't remember. Scientist still don't know why we don't have memories before that age... Plus it is indeed a psychological response to protect yourself from the hard feelings accompanied by the memories. I'am so happy to hear that you know that your experience is valid, even if you don't remember. It must be really frustrating to experience those problems. Strong that you share your experience here @ psy2go
@@tribenidas2252 It's called repression. That is a psychological concept from Anna Freud. People repress the memory to a place where we are no longer aware of it's existence or a little bit aware of it, but it still causes problems from that place that bother us. That's what the theory says, but know that every experience is an individual story that is different for everyone...
⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠Same here until I had a dream 6 years ago and everything clicked...i was at school pre-school I've been trying to find someone to blame...once the dream happened I realized there was no-one alive to blame those ppl aren't even alive anymore... I remember having lots of nightmares wetting and always wanting to touch myself... Awful world we live in
“Was it my fault?” Asked the short skirt. “No, it happened to me too” replied the burka. The diaper in the corner couldn’t even speak. -Darshan Mondkar My favorite quote on this topic. Hearing some of your stories makes me wonder about what we’re teaching people (or not teaching) to make anyone think non consensual interactions are okay. It’s not about men or women at this point. This is about humanity. And it’s a terrifying world to live in.
It doesn't even have to be non-consensual to mess you up, being too young, impaired, toxic behaviors, and many other things will also impact you. This topic needs much more awareness spreading, thanks for doing the good work.
Those are all forms of non-consent. Minors can’t give legal consent. NO ONE impaired can give legal consent. Depending on what you mean by toxic behaviors, if they’re behaviors to get sex out of someone who doesn’t want to consent… then it’s not consent.
Ty for saying this I'm someone who has been taken advantage of and lured into doing sexual activities even though i didn't want to...i experienced toxicity as well
Completely agree! I have for a long time been blaming myself, and felt so ashamed of it. Even though it was never my fault, because I was too young to understand. They are the ones that are taking advantage of you, they are the adult and the one's that manipulating you into it... I want you to be aware though that even if it kinda "feels" like it was "consensual", it never was..! Because a child CAN'T EVER give consent! they're too young to do that. So the blame is ONLY on the perpetrator, and NEVER the victim. Sending you love
yea, for me, it was communication issues. I was focusing too much on a clear yes or no I ignored every other way ny ex tried to signal to stop. I was devastated when I realized what I had done. we talked it out and came to the conclusion it was a communication error, months go by and everything was alright. then beginning of this year, I found out they told one of their friends during the time it happened (I'm not mad, nor do I blame them, they don't have the best mental health), and that friend of theirs blurted it out to a group of people I'm not well acquainted with, for lack of better words. and after that I just broke it off because it was too much weight for me. please do be careful with bodily signals and don't completely focus on a clear yes or no, be aware of everything, especially if they suffer from mental issues and can't communicate clearly.
Someone i know (Gf) was in a toxic relationship with her ex before she met me. It hurts me to know that her ex not only abused her, but SA'ed her as well. It burns me to the core that she had to go through that and carry that burden for a year. I was even surprised that she trusted me enough to confess to me. We're already 10 months in and i can say its not easy to handle someone with this type of trauma, but i still love her for who she is. I already committed to carrying this weight with her, and i will not stop until she is finally healed
I almost cried seeing this, i was victim of SA and got Hypersexuality, at a young age. I never told anyone about this but my Boyfriend. My abuser was my cousin, so i always see him in family reunions. My bf always take care of me and help me with anxiety attacks, he always told me that it was not my fault and is helping me to overcome with the Hypersexuality and all of this trauma.
@Daisydrool I try to distract myself or my boyfriend does, having thoughs that you don't want is horrible, so my boyfriend watch something with me or distracts me by having a conversation, or playing together, things that keep your mind ocupied on something else. The last time we read a book and we talked about it until I was better, that really helps a lot. He is my hero.
Hello, an incest survivor here! I had to suffer in silence because I can't open up to people about my SA experience, my mom did this when I was 5 months old, and then again at 12, I didn't tell anyone because I know that they will downplay my trauma or joke about it saying "Mother-Daughter incest doesn't exist" or something like that, I'm 13 and I still have to live with mom, I am trying to protect my little sister from SA and I am also trying to heal from my trauma despite my abuser being here
I was sexually assaulted when I was a young boy, by my brother and it still hurts me to this day. I have never told anyone about this or the problems its caused me the main problem its caused is I developed problems with people touching me. A lot of people don't know that sexual assault can happen to man and not many people know it can happen to young boys. Its not just woman of young girls it happens to everyone and it happens without warning. if you've been sexually assaulted when you were young know that your not alone.
@@AroAceGaming2116 Thank you for sharing your experience. It can be encouraging to many sufferers who have been afraid to tell their story. You have a purpose.
It can happen to anyone at anytime I was sexually assaulted when I was 10 by my “brother” I don’t think he’s is now after the possibility of me being pregnant with his kid
Spirituality is creating your own reality by learning from your stepping stones and raising your vibration to be your best self and achieve your mission goals in this lifetime.
actually this makes alot sense to me... i kind of live like that whithout even being aware of the tradition. it just feels natural to me... i mean most religions are more about power and control then anything else ... they lost the essence ... think those 4 core principles are the essence and also the reason why its just healthy to choose to live by thees "values". ... ...being spiritual not religeous... doing the right thing for the greater good not just for personal gain... no need to live on your knees as long you dont put those close to you down. dont be so greedy. there would be enough for all of us... but yo i guess every herd got its black sheep but the european mind is more down whith the devil, the EGO ... false light blindet by there beauty lol. ..who are the real Savages? not everything that shines is gold... the devil is a liar. no matter which shade of brown or whatever... positiv giving or Negative taking... balance just some thoughts and thnx for providing these infos. PEACE out & greetings from Germany
This is a very important topic. Many would call it taboo, but it should NOT be seen this way. Every victim of SA of any form , any gender , any age is valid.
I can't believe I've been grieving my younger self all these years and i didn't notice it. When i became an artist and i used a ton of my childhood shows as my inspiration. I didn't know i was subconsciously soothing myself, i was just using them to get better
I have persistent depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, ptsd, adhd, and autism. I am a victim of childhood SA. It wasn't r*pe but only because I escaped by a miracle. This video hit hard and is so true. I have sexual avoidance and pain if I try.
I went through a traumatic experience during a past relationship related to sex. Now, I even question my sexuality because I lost interest in any form for the opposite sex
I think the one that I fought my way out of probably impacted me the hardest. Just because they were not successful does not mean it shouldn't impact you or as much. I still find myself minimizing it or re-framing it as 'other people didn't have a chance to fight or to resist'. And sometimes I still wonder if I would have been a different person for these last 18 years, if I had let it happen, or pushed myself to comply with the woman's advances before she recruited two other people - all whom I thought of as friends - to assist her in drugging me and then attacking me. What really hurts is that I was actually so happy leading up to when she arrived, as the other two arrived one by one and brought me 'gifts' - I can remember thinking wow, this is so nice, these people are being nice to me and brought me things and like me enough to do so. I was smiling and happy and at that point, it meant a lot to me and I thought I was having a really good day
I was only in elementary when I went through COCSA(child on child sexual assault) and he was my cousin younger than me by just one year… I always and I still kinda do blame myself, “I was the oldest I should’ve said something” “You’re both cousins this is disgusting” “Why is did he do that to me?” “I’m scared to tell him to stop” “I’m just gonna let him do this, it’s not like it’s hurting maybe I’m just being a crybaby?” “I don’t want him to touch me there” “Why is he laughing at me like this, why does he like this?” All these questions and stuff I told myself at the time and I wanted to tell my mom but I couldn’t, I knew she’d believe me but my cousin was on my dads side of the family and his family back eachother up no matter what… even when they knew my dad abused my mom, sexually, verbally, emotionally, physically, and I had to watch it all so when I wanted to tell my mom… “ if I tell her papi will hurt her and maybe me… I don’t want mami to get hurt again…. It’s ok, maybe he will stop doing this to me soon” I told myself that. And it never went more than touching but eventually he began to start kissing me… tongue and everything… it was fucking disgusting I felt so gross I hated it I hated my life I hated myself and I wanted to die… i was only in elementary and yet I had thoughts of offing myself… eventually we stopped visiting my cousin and his mom and I haven’t seen them since but I still feel disgusting and embarrassed and ashamed… and the worst part is I told my parents this year, my mom cried and said she went through the exact same situation as a kid and she was hoping she could protect me from that and then she said “I’m so sorry… I failed… I failed you as a mom” I cried because how would she have known but my dad…. “I’m sorry but you’re just gonna have to forget about it… I mean it already happened so just stop thinking about it and move on”…. No tears… no apology… nothing…. I’ve been dealing with my hyper sexuality because of my cousin I always thought maybe I’d stop but I’m 16 now and I’m still dealing with it… And that’s my story about my SA… COCSA survivors rarely ever come out because of people like my dad “Oh well you were both just kids” “He’s just a kid he couldn’t have known better” “He’s a boy he was probably curious” And it hurts… it hurts that so many kids not only have to fear the adults but even the kids their age… and I’m sorry to all survivors of sa we deserved better and know it’s never your fault and it never will be and I hope you all have healed or are healing from, it doesn’t matter your gender or age or anything your story is still and will always be valid, you ARE valid♥️
honey, i am so incredibly sorry that you went through all of that. i pray you find healing and peace and that each abuser in your family receives justice. when i was reading through your story, i realized our’s have a resemblance. i was 6 while he was 5. it was halloween night and me and my cousins and sister went to my room to play. he tried to force both me, my 4 year old sister and his 7 year old sister to sit, bare, on his face. i did it. everything in me felt so ashamed, felt so disgusted, felt so humiliated. i resisted at first, trying to leave the room. he physically pulled me back and manipulated me to do it. he said it felt good. at 5 years old. before i knew it, my 9 year old cousin came into the room and scolded me, telling me that what i did was very bad and that it was all my fault. he did this to me and his sister at least 1 other time. for years, i’ve held that in my memory, feeling so ashamed of it and thinking it was my fault. i opened up to my mom about it and she didn’t treat it as SA. COCSA gets so pushed under the rug. no one wants to admit that it happened nor do they want to believe that it happens. and it’s that much worse if it’s a family member. i’m sorry for the both of us and i hope that we can heal 🫶🏻
Exciting video, A year ago i took the no contact route, well i wouldn't say it didn't go well, but i missed her and sometimes you have to leave your comfort zone and go for what you want, Without knowing and having a huge ego, we might actually miss out on our soul mate all in the name of not settling for less, I know who i am, and at the same time i know what i want for me, so i did all i could to get her back, and I must say, it was the best decision i have ever made, we have been together again for over 7 months, yes marriage isn't always Rosey, but i am lucky to have her, just as she is, to have me, we compliment each other
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i am in a similar situation, and i do not know what else do to have him back, i have been dying inside, people actually think i am happy, i am not.
I feel your pain, sister. after trying out the no contact experiment that failed miserably, i had to find other means, i had to reach out to a spiritual adviser, it was brilliant idea which i never thought it was, but it worked wonders for me.
As someone who was sexually abused at the ages of 4, 10 and 14 years old. It is a traumatic experience that can affect the rest of your life, if you are not aware of it. You must practice developing the awareness of how the trauma may have affected you. Because otherwise, you will be unconsciously responding to the trauma.
So true. What happened to me was too much, and I repressed it all for a long time. Even thought I wasn't thinking about it or aware of it, the fallout from the abuse was clear, and I had a host of mental illness problems that I wasn't properly accepting or adapting to. Now I know why I make the choices I do, and how to steer it better.
Thank for sharing your thoughts on it! I clicked to understand better. What I can say from myself is that after processing anything severe happening to you, you gain much power afterwards and resilience. It surely takes time. 💚
I also suffered from this in my childhood My own cousin brothers and My uncle used to sexually assault me and now they behave like nothing is wrong with them.. The same uncle tries to SA my small sister but I immediately recognize it and tell my parents about it. They just get angry but never confront him because of a damn shame. I never tell them about myself but I can't stand the same thing happening with my sister.. I also feel so threatened and suffer from nightmares from time to time. I still fear them I don't want to sit with them but I have to see them and smile.
It hurts worse when you're told filing a report won't do anything. There will be no investigation. There will be no justice. If you do file, expect a lot of insensitive questions from the police. After dealing with it, we have to do the work and heal. We are the ones who have to undergo this change, but not the person who committed the crime. Also, when people say, "you're so strong for surviving." NO. Please, stop saying that. It hurts so much. It sounds like a badge of honor we received. We are not strong because we survived this situation. We were ALWAYS strong - long before we were harmed.
Police don't care and will mock you and make it clear they have no intent on doing anything about. It more times than not they all protect each other than actually seek justice. The women in high roles are worse bc they get a pick me status for helping men get away with the crimes and will get promotions and more slack in other areas where other men wouldn't get bc of this bc women defending male abusers seems crazy and really heightens the protection in the mix of the messed up things. Sexual abuse keep the system going. Most people do most crimes bc of past sexual abuse. Courts would be cleared out if they actually reacted to sexual abuse and pedophilia properly. The abusers no they will get away with and the odds of any sort of consequences of any sort are significantly higher than anything occuring.
Amen. You definitely were strong before. The war doesn't make the arrow strong that survived, it destroys every arrow that isn't and shows which one is! Trauma HURT. There is no bright side. It destroys some people and only the strong survive.
You’re completely right and thank you for noting the “strong” comments. I know people mean well and they just don’t know how to respond, because there is not a right thing to say. But to anyone reading this, a good place to start might be to let the survivor see that you feel for them. When I’ve told people my story, and they’ve cried on my behalf, it’s been the most validating part of my experience. Cry for them, with them, give them a hug and let them feel how much it sucks. It will get better, but they don’t need someone to tell them that, they need time to see it. I reported my inflictor and in the police interview I told them that the reason I reported was because if it wasn’t me, it would have been someone else, and if it is someone else after me, and they decide to report too, at some point someone will have to do something. That, and I needed to feel like I did something to prevent it from happening to someone else, and that was my closure. This behavior is not okay, and I don’t think society spends enough time talking about why this happens addressing the root cause of the motives of these behaviors. We live in a victim centered world, and survivors need all the support, still I believe if we lived in a Perpetrator centered world, or even just shifted it a bit, we could make progress in actually lowering the rates of abuse. For anyone this might help, people who assault others do so for the need to grasp control most of the time. Researching the motives did help me make sense of it, and this stuff doesn’t happen for no reason. Abusers are not born, they’re made. This isn’t in the interest of offering compassion or excusal of behavior for this disgusting atrocity of an action. It’s just an explanation for why, and maybe an insight on how it might be prevented. (Prevented in terms of healing from wounds that elicit these behaviors. I in no way believe or am saying that it is anyone else’s job to prevent assault. It’s no one’s fault but the person who decided to do the thing.) And finally, whatever you believe in, know that karma is real, you’ll get yours and it will heal and nourish and replenish your soul, and they’ll get theirs… and it will be as it should be in the end. I’m sorry you went through your experience or know someone who has. Know that it isn’t your job to do anything but heal and love yourself.
The last part is so real and true to me… I feel the same way, I feel a sadness and pain in my heart when someone says that to me, about being “strong”. That’s not what I want to be told. I didn’t want to be strong, I’m not proud of that, I just wanted to be protected.
my ex suffers from such trauma during her teenage years, i saw how a flashback can drastically impact ones behaviour, how SA ruined both her past and our relationship along with her trust issues, not just to others but also herself. All of the self blaming, anorexia. uneased feeling, hatred toward intimacy...and not to mention the pain she bared, one cant imagine such a young girl having to carry that weight on her back. To her i would say sorry for not being to support her in any meaningful way. And i wish you will be able to not only heal but also better your current and future life, remember it was not your fault in any way, shape of forms
I think it is incredible that our mind can forget things or hide them away from us in order to protect us, its just really hard when you recover all the memorys again. But its a really surreal feeling when you realize that it was in fact an actual memory
It is incredible and so very difficult. I have PTSD from an assault that happened 18 years ago. I saw the guy and stood near him and talked to him this summer. I was SO uncomfortable but couldn’t figure out why. I was in PTSD from that moment but of course didn’t realize it for months. It took so long for me to put the memory together. I went through rape trauma syndrome and still have fairly severe PTSD. It’s been 6 months since I saw him. Anyway all that to say yes, it’s wild how we have to reconstruct traumatic memory, and also so devastating 💔
As a male SA survivor I just wanted to tell you, thank you. It's hard to live like I used too before, especially when my friends had left me for my SA'er. I'm left with nothing, but I'm trying to push on, but it's hard. My SA'er lives 600m from my house and will be attending the same school as me for another two years. I'm trying to move on, but it's hard. If anyone of you also struggles with it, try to seek professional help, but please, keep this in mind that not every therapist is a good therapist and sometimes you have to find another one. Try to find one that is qualified in SA trauma, because I wasn't lucky enough and didn't found the right one. If your therapist victim blames you just leave, because you will need a bigger Therapy after session with therapist like this than before.
I've been SA'd both physically and verbally a few times over the last few years. No actual cases of intxrcxxrse but it still hurts. I tried to tell people but nobody did anything, people shut me down saying "no, you weren't", "you're a man, not a girl" or "to man up". I wouldn't say I'm "traumatised", more so "emotionally numbed". At this point, I haven't bothered telling anybody about it since the last time, because nothing gets done. :/
The worst bit is I don't even know who the people were, so even if someone would listen, they'll never actually be held accountable for their actions... I just hope they don't do it to someone else...
Thank you for putting C-PTSD first in the list of possible impacts of SA. It's so awful that it's in the ICD-11, but because it's not in the DSM, the USA hardly recognizes it. This means that children who grow up with SA and survivors of long term intimate violence don't get the help we really need.
I struggle to talk about this with anyone because I’m afraid it doesn’t “classify” as SA. When I was younger 7-10 my parents would do the “deed” while I was on the same bed. This occurred several times, and I lost trust within myself. I felt numb and disgusted with myself, and I struggle to get close with other people, including my own family. I’ve always hated physically touch, like hugging other people and stuff. I never knew why but only till this year I only realized why I hated it. Thank you for helping me feel heard and understood. If you relate to my story, I’m always here to hear others stories.
That certainly classifies as SA, it can be very harmful to be exposed to such things at a very young age, I am so sorry this happened to you. Hope you're doing well and can heal.
My close friend assaulted me when I was 15 and he was 17. We were next to my best friend camping an hour away from my home. I had to go through a whole night hoping my best friend wouldn't wake up. Watching this video made me cry. You say so many supportive words and it was really lovely to hear. I hope anyone that's been through sexual trauma knows it's not your fault. If you say no, say nothing or say yes but change your mind later on, it's not your fault.
I have experienced SA in early infancy. It extended throughout my childhood, and ended when I was a teenager. To grapple with the fact that my body was “more sexualized” as a child than it was an adult, was something no living being should ever have to endure. I struggle to heal every day. I struggle to sleep every night. Thank you for making this video, and so many others, for it is more impactful than I can propely explain.
i do ot have any sexual trauma but when Psych2go said these "it was not your fault", "you are not to blame" a tear fell down. i hope people who experience these trauma i hope you will love yourself and heal even if its slow dont give up you are worth it anda you are precious and there are people maybe not many but there is someone who will be there for you adn listen to your worry and troubles. english is not my first language and im not a very comfroting person but just know that all im saying is dont give up
I was sexually assaulted by 4 women, 2 of them family, one a caregiver, mostly between 3 and 6. You are alone. Nobody will help you. Learning the lesson that screaming only excites the predator is one of the hardest things to go through. I don't even have a therapist I can open up to and I have 2. Offenders get a release date, we do not.
Thank you for sharing. It's never easy. So sorry this happened to you. You didn't deserve any of what happened to you. As a survivor of years of sexual abuse by people who were suppose to love and protect me, I emphasise with you. It hurts, it really hurts and being alone and no one to talk to makes things seem worst. I hope you find someone , a therapist you can click with. Keep going until you can find that person. Baby steps, in your own time, your younger self needs you to be strong enough for the both you ❤ Take care
I was SAed by my grandma, I also was betrayed by my old friends, who would climb on top of me and try to do stuff to me. This video made me feel comfort or, at peace with the feeling it wasn’t my fault. Thanks for making this video!
Man... Where do I even start?... I'm 22 years old and just now learning to talk about my issues with my therapists. Been seeing one since I was 6 or 7 after what happened to me but for some reason I couldn't talk about anything that happened to me, hell it felt like I couldn't comprehend that I had been SA'd until I was 21. I spent time in foster care too, I was abused by a foster parent for 2 and a half years then a long with that I went through probably 4 therapists within that time period and for again, I couldn't comprehend that I was being abused, it was like I thought it was normal to be abused so I never said anything. Even now at 22 years old I'm just now comprehending that happened, these videos help, a lot of videos on TH-cam have made me realize a lot about myself and my issues. Just hope I can make it through life...
I've been crying since the moment I saw the notification,this means so much for me. The fact about the mental consequences and the part about hypersexuality - sexual avoidance, made me so relieved to understand. For the first time I don't think there's something fundamentally wrong with me so thank you again.
Knowing there are people who invalidate the horrors of SA and the traumas with them is sickening. I honestly validate those pains. The horrors are real and denying them is ridiculous.
People who haven't gone through this will never know and understand the impact it has on victims/ survivors. Everything she points out there is real not fake , people go through this unfortunately not everyone understands and shows empathy.
I was sa'ed when I was 11 by my uncle. It actually opened my mind after everything. I remember praying before everything happened. I talked and said to God, "Please, protect me from any devils and harm while I'm sleeping". But then, things happened and it made me lost my faith. I remember feeling guilt, shame and dirty after. I also tried to h4ng myself but my mom caught me.
I also suffered from this in my childhood My own cousin brothers and My uncle used to sexually assault me and now they behave like nothing is wrong with them.. The same uncle tries to SA my small sister but I immediately recognize it and tell my parents about it. They just get angry but never confront him because of a damn shame. I never tell them about myself but I can't stand the same thing happening with my sister.. I also feel so threatened and suffer from nightmares from time to time. I still fear them I don't want to sit with them but I have to see them and smile... Don't lose hoope We can't hurt ourselves because of some lusty monsters
Sadly, God doesn’t take away anybodies free will, even if they are choosing to do something bad with it…He can’t stop a bad person from making a bad choice. But I know God would’ve cried with you and felt your pain and it probably breaks his heart when he sees his creations being horrible to others. A misconception about God is that he can and should stop all evil in the world, but he can’t. But evil will face the consequences eventually. God still loves you and is there to help you heal from things. He doesn’t stop things but he can and does comfort you and help you deal with them. It was not your fault, you aren’t dirty, and your uncle is a horrible person to do that. I hope you’ve been able to heal and learn to deal with things, no matter if you ever turned back to god or not.
@@IAmNot-Everywhere-God can’t take away the agency of others to make a choice. He is bound by the free will he gave to man-he gave us the gift of choosing for ourselves, but unfortunately people choose evil instead of good sometimes. So yeah, he couldn’t stop the bad choice of a bad man….but not because he’s not there or not powerful enough. It’s just because he can’t step in and stop every single bad thing. That’s why he sent Jesus to give us a way to be resurrected and healed from all the bad things that happened to us.
Ive forgotten my sexual assault from childhood, and i myself cannot remember any of it. But i do know it happened, i believe my brain is trying to protect me, or either i was just too young to really remember. Multiple things after that first incident, have happened. Family, close family friends, my friends, my friends family.. things have continued for me. But around the age of probably 10 for me i finally understood why i acted the way i did, and now that im 18, i continue to struggle with everything youve listed, emotional wise. I have no medicine, no therapy, and this video has helped me more than any of those things listed have. I appreciate you. Thank you.
As a survivor of multiple SA as a child, i still struggle with nightmares about my SA, and i feel like the hardest thing I've conquered in life was finally telling my family about what happened and receiving support. i used to act out and be violent when i was younger, and yes, it was a pathetic cry for help, but i was a child with a disability trying to understand why. Anyone who is an SA survivor male female nonbinary you are not alone, and it wasn't your fault ❤
I was SA'd by an abusive ex for two years, when I was 13-14 and he was 17-18. I'm a bit older now, have been in a healthy relationship with a wonderful guy for almost a year but my trauma still affects me to this day. I thought I had done a great deal of healing, but when I'm in a situation where I want to say "no" to the person I love, even knowing that he's my safe space and will always respect me, I feel scared. He makes me feel so loved, appreciated, comfortable, respected and secure, but sometimes I still feel scared, for something that happened long ago. It's so frustrating. Thank you for talking about this.
One of my biggest fears is to fall in love with someone and they kick me out of their lives because I'd been SA'ed. Your comment gives me comfort that one day, it's possible that someone will love me and not blame me for it
I was a victim of SA at the age of thirteen my stepdad started abusing me in this way. It went for three years before I told people what he was doing on a semi regular basis. It can get better you all are amazing people and you deserve so much more
As a survivor of SA I grew up with my abuser and it happened for many years. We're actually working on getting diagnosed with DID due to this. I'm sure there's more abuse I endured but I don't remember it all. It's hard and I'm here for anyone here.❤️
I was SA’d by a member of my own family when I was 6-7. I still remember everything. And yet I still had to see this person every day of my life up until I was 18, when I moved abroad. I feel I’ve never developed normal relationships and friendships since, though I’ve suffered many other additional childhood traumas I think this one has impacted me the most as a person. I wouldn’t wish this on anybody
Speaking as someone who was healing from Sexual Trauma and had been retraumatized fairly recently, I appreciate the topic being tackled with respect. I still remember how most of it happened, and I felt upset with myself that I didn't recognize what was going on... But... Then I realized that, this video is right, no one deserves for that situation to happen to them, and to be gaslit by people around them to the point they wonder if they are just overreacting. Those are feelings you have, and it's fine. They are for you to work through.
Timestamps 1). Sex 1:34 2). Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) 2:56 3). Trust and intimacy issues 3:34 4). Depression and anxiety 3:57 5). Self-esteem and body image 4:24 6). Dissociation and emotional numbing 4:43 7). Sexual dysfunction 5:09 8). Flashback and triggers 5:47 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I started crying happy tears at the end when you were telling us it’s not our fault, this video made me see things differently and I’m crying right now thank you so much I hope the best for you.
Hello I am Cherri, I am a member of a system. This video triggered me to the front, and I fronted for the host to watch this video to protect them from unwanted memories. I am a survivor of SA and Ash (the host) does not know about this. I try my hardest to shield them from it. They do not remember and nobody knows about this trauma, I keep it to myself. You don’t need to read this by the way, this is for Ash to read. It was in a preschool playground, their ex-friend pulled them behind a wall and kissed them, restraining them so they could not get away. This time in their life is very important because the entire system is starting to process these so called “false memories” and even me myself am not sure if these things ever happened. I am aware that an unwanted make out session is not the worst form of SA but it should definitely be acknowledged. Sincerely, Cherri
Thank you for opening up about this experience. I've gone through something similar and I often cannot take myself serious that I'm so "hung up" on it. I hope this form of SA will be more spoken about and acknowledged with time.
@@yokhonart Same here. It feels like, I don't deserve to hurt, compared to everyone. And when I opened up to someone I trusted, I was told to get over it. It's so blurry. That's the worst part. It's so "little" and I barely remember it that I doubt myself. All these "would've, should've"s just don't leave. But I hurt all the same like everyone else.
It’s been 9 years and I still have flashbacks, and still think of it everyday. But I got a good ending, it took four long and shitty years, but I got my abuser in jail
@ I reported it 3 years after it happened, I somehow managed to tell it when I was 10 years old, because I was so young I didn’t go though the details of it being pushed through. In total, it took 4 years of near daily anxiety and stress before he got put in jail, even when my case was active. I was told that my case was far from normal and should have not taken nearly as long as it did
Hey, I just wanted to say, this is honestly really informational and I'm glad you guys posted this. As someone who's a survivor, I want to say you guys aren't alone, and you can get through this, even if it might be difficult. I experienced S/A from my dad at a young age, and never realized it was wrong because people thought he was just joking around, when in reality it wasn't how someone should have acted towards me at all, especially my own father. I know it was hard to realize for me that it was wrong, but once you do it really helps you start to accept and stop excusing the behavior of an abuser you may have. They may have a good reputation, or everybody around you might love them, but it's still wrong. It took me a while to realize that, but it's something many have to in order to start healing. I'm still in the house, with my older sister and other siblings, but I've been able to do my best to protect them and myself. It's hard, but you can get through this. Incest is something that people frown upon, but the thing is, is when it happens to someone usually people don't wanna believe it. For example, when my family found out because I had reached out to the police (which they didn't do anything about, saying that it's not mol*station if there's no pen*tration,) they started blaming me, and denying my dad would do that. Now, I know they're wrong, and no matter what someone tells you, it isn't normal. You're strong, and you can get through this, I'm going to move out in the future when I can, and I know all of you can get out of those situations eventually. You're strong, and you don't deserve what happened to you. You're valid.
Thank you for this; as someone who is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse leading into almost all my adult life of abuse, I needed this. It took up to the last 4 years to start working on myself. I still have setbacks, and I do beat myself up about it, but I know that I can't hold it against myself either; it's a journey that I will always be healing from.
As an autistic trans woman; S.H and S.A. have been a big part of my life ... I often feel broken,alone, desperate, help/hopeless Thank you for this video ♡
It took me YEARS to even question the possibility of me suffering of this trauma. It is indeed a matter of small things adding up and then slow burning deep in my psyche. I’ll bring it up to my therapist soon. Thank you so much for this video. It helped me understand this trauma better and identify it.
I've talked to my sexual trauma and mistreatment from others and she was very supportive. She said that as long as I talk to other's that I trust and set boundaries, sticking with them and keep fighting, I'll be okay and be more comfortable with my body. I even told my boyfriend about it, and he held me close as I cried.
I have a close personal friend who experienced this, and while I developed feelings for her, I've agreed to stay platonic to be the friend she needs right now outside of romance. I try to get her to talk about it with me sometimes, but it's very hard for her, and we can't talk long. Part of that is because I'm a guy, and she doesn't trust guys, but part of that is the cptsd of bringing up her trauma again. Last time we talked about therapy, she said she couldn't keep affording it, apparently even with her insurance. I've offered many times to listen to her, and sometimes she does share, but she doesn't want to let herself trust me with everything and she doesn't have many others at all willing to help her. She's in a very difficult space financially and emotionally, and I often feel powerless to help her. I feel selfish for liking her because of my own emotional needs. I wish I could fix everything for her, but I can't even if I could. She's trying to do it all alone, and it breaks my heart.
@nataliaalfonso2662 I'm just trying to support her as best as I can. If it were me, I'd need to talk it out, so I guess that's why I go that route. She does talk about it sometimes, which I think may help, but mostly it bothers her too much, or she doesn't trust me enough to say what's really bothering her.
@@joshclark44 Keep doing what you're doing...patiently. She needs you to be her friend. She may never want more, but if she does, respond to her cues. Don't ever push her into more or you will lose her.
Not everyone needs to talk tho, if she wants to, let her talk. Theres also a huge difference between talking to a professional and a friend. It can help to do it with either one but some prefer a therapist cause its more neutral/clinical. And she might wanna keep some things inbetween her and a professional. Dont push her too hard or she might distance herself from you. It can take a long time to deal with these things. As long as you dont expect her to tell u everything theres nothing wrong with trying to help. Put her wishes first when trying tho.
@victoryamartin9773 she's already told me she doesn't want anything more. It's hard to accept because while she avoids relationships, I subconsciously am desperate for one. But I have eventually come to the conclusion that she needs a friend more than a lover atm and if I really loved her I'd do what she needs me to be even if it's not what I want for her. I'm trying to move on, because I do appreciate her as a friend. It's just hard sometimes because she's one of the few girls I really thought I had something with and I just read it wrong yet again...
It’s been almost 5 years and sometimes I still grief, and have flashbacks. It’s so hard not to feel guilt because I feel like none of this would’ve happened if I didn’t get with him. It doesn’t help at all when he would keep showing up at my job I had at the time as well. I just pray that he doesn’t find out where I start my new job at.
I don't know the full details of your story but there's one thing I do know: it wasn't your fault. In my experience, I feel guilt because at the time I said yes, but I only did because I knew he'd get upset and threatening if I didn't. It was still manipulation and abuse. You're not alone. Your experience and your emotions are valid. You're NOT guilty in any way for what happened to you. You didn't deserve that.
Didn’t realize how much this video would hit so hard to hear until I started crying near the end. I really appreciate the soft tone in which you speak about this topic specifically and tell us we are not to blame and didn’t deserve it. Think that’s what hit me hardest
Thank you for covering this. You never think it will happen to you when it does. The betrayal hits hard. You don’t always react like you imagine you would. No one is prepared for it. Almost four years later I have finally started to heal. Take the time you need to recoup. ❤ Much love to fellow survivors. ❤
I've disassociated a lot in my childhood, so I've had lots of amnesia as a result... I don't remember anything extremely explicit, but I remember this nervousness that ran so deep. I don't consider myself a survivor because I don't even remember, and I don't want to dismiss people who have gone through it. I'm sure it's difficult for people to go through it and speak about it. Especially coming out of the shell of denial and saying 'that was wrong'!
thank you, it’s so hard getting flashbacks from the past and thinking about what i could’ve did if i never let him do it, im hyper sexual and i can’t stop thinking about the past so vividly and it hurts.
I had the hypersexual side effect, and because of it people said I couldn't possibly be a victim... Okay...so why is it when I leave my house I have debilitating panic attacks? Why when my phone rings I start sobbing? And so much more... I hate it. I never asked for this.
I think this is one of the worse ways you could possibly get from such a situation and I hope your doing better,I would recommend you take one step at a time it will be a long journey and it will be hard because trauma isn't a joke but you can do it
Oh man! Felt so overwhelming the moment I saw the thumbnail... I'm currently in my late teens. It happened may be a decade ago. For the first time, it was a street vendor and for the second time it was a teenage guy and a neighbor for thr third time... God!! It's been a lot of time but the things and thoughts keep coming back. A lot of shit at home keeps happening and in the end I get blamed, my own parents say that the fault is in me... Had a miserably bad relationship for 2 years. This lead me towards severe depression and several anxiety disorders. It's been a year I've been diagnosed. And my parents say why don't u just be okay it's been a lot of time since ur medication and all... Huh... Man!! How!! This is a lot of trauma to process. I've forgotten how it feels to be normal. Just hope it gets better someday and i feel *normal* atleast. :)
@@Psych2goStupid TH-cam and stupid censorship rules. There should be laws in place to prevent the censorship of such vital information that shouldn’t even be taboo and most definitely not silenced. Makes me so angry. Then at the same time TH-cam will happily promote to everyone, these so called “Mukbangers”, that are slowly eating their life away. They show that to everyone , including young people!! I would be boycotting TH-cam if it weren’t for the great educational content that’s so accessible… For example on this channel. (Excuse the angry rant.. Sorry, not sorry xP )
I’ve been coming to terms with the fact that I was a victim of SA years ago and it’s been absolutely devastating and jarring to relive the memories, the triggers, and certain things like smells that would literally make me sick. There were so many enablers of my abuser that have told me to stay quiet to “not cause a scandal” or “if you come forward everyone’s going to know it’s you”. I’ve decided that I’m going to come forward now even though I’ve experienced healing and forgiveness. There still needs to be Justice and protection so no more potential victims are made or harmed.
As a 15yr transgender male, I've always broke down whenever SA is talked about, I'm super happy that it's getting awareness it needs. I have very bad memory and have always struggled with hypersexuality since I was 8, the only time I do remember being SA'd was back in 7th grade. I struggled with a guy 2 grades above me, who I thought was my friend, but he would constantly touch me and boss me arould. The last day I ever saw him was when he cupped my chest on the school bus and it was his stop, luckily a girl I knew helped me and reported him to the school. If it wasnt for her I would’ve stayed silent. I still struggle with it to this day and try to remind myself that even if it was something as small as what he was doing, my feelings and experiences are still valid. I hope to anyone out there struggling, that they get the help they need and can finally heal.
@@Ash-x9m Exactly what was said above, trolling is one thing (and usually shitty on its own) but doing it here is absolutely vile. Reassess your character, do better. To the commenter, that is so scary and I'm so sorry you went through it. People can underestimate and/or dismiss the impact of SA events like this cause maybe they're "brief" or a "one-time thing" and it's complete bull. This shit stays with you for life, and I hope you're doing alright and healing at your own pace.
I kept this video saved, and i couldnt figure out why. Untiltaday when someone I spoke to asked for advice on how to deal with $/A and the thoughts if inadequacy and everything else. I didnt know how to help but i sent this video, i hope they feel better soon, im always here for them no matter what❤
This helps a bit, I am 31 and out of those 31 years only 8 years have been assault-free, 3 of those years was until i was 3 the last 5 years free are recent, I am still struggling and in a major depressive wave currently. My friends barely convinced me not to isolate myself, which is what i often do that will end up being gone for years at a time. I cannot go out and when i do it is barely or if i have someone with me, being alone causes me to panic in the store, which causes people's attention to be on me which is worse. Working is near impossible and calling or even talking at times is unbearable. Some people think that calling me a "professional survivor" helps me when it makes it worse, that is not what i want to be known for, i don't want to be know as the person who was damaged constantly through ages 3-26. I want to be me and its hard to break out of that shell of just being seen as a victim.
I can't believe how many people struggle with SA no matter how old they were in these dark days. Please guys, remember you're not alone and this wasn't your fault! There are so many people who love you, you changed someone's life! You matter and nothing is over for you. People: you're created to fight because you're strong. Keep going because one day your future self will smile remembering how much you have been through and you're still here giving a reason for someone ( maybe yourself too) to live!
Having experienced this and healing my inner child, I pray that anyone suffering in silence awaken to the fact that it's not their fault, heal through the love of God and have a beautiful life🙏 Amen
Honestly, I love how psych2go goes in depth with each lasting effect and what it does to a person. Especially the symptoms and how sexual violence can be by literally *anyone.*
Im 15 and a survivor of SA at the ages of 5 and 8, I highly appreciate this video because it helps me understand my problems more and now I can work on to fix them:D Its really sad to know how many people experience this. This disgusting thing shouldn't be this common!! And most of the time the abuser dosent get any punishment. 2 people SA'ed me at 2 different ages and none of them got in ANY trouble. My close relative whom I told about this is still close friends with one of the abusers. Its not fair.
Bro our stories are nearly identical, except I was younger, and my abuser was my brother, and he had a history of doing the same thing to my older sisters(at the time it was only known about my oldest sister) and knowing it could have been prevented makes my blood boil, especially since he's in jail(for drugs) and my mother who knows what he did still sends him sooo much money, while we're barley holding up
I'm sharing my story: I was SA when i was three years old and the person who SA'd me was the one person i trusted the most a family member of mine and it was life changing for me opening up was difficult for me since no one understood or blamed me for the event but i forgave my abuser even though it affected me tremendously I'm ready to move on. Remember you're not alone and your trauma is valid
I was sexually assaulted in kindergarten by a classmate when I was 5 years old. I've always just pushed it aside and tried to forget. I am so grateful for you covering this topic and validating our pain. Thank you. ❤
the affirmations you said almost made me start sobbing, thank you, this video makes me feel a lot better about what happened and makes me feel a lot less alone, i don’t have a lot of people i trust with what happened, seeing this come up in my recommended was unexpected cause i don’t watch these kinds of videos but I’m so happy it did, thank you for making this video
I deeply appreciate the awareness this video brings. As an SA survivor myself, it is comforting to see videos openly speaking about it and comment sections talking about shared experiences. Too many people deny the horrors of SA and trauma it brings, so im glad that this exists as a safe space for people to open up about this.
this video was really comforting to me. i’ve been dealing with sexual trauma for abt a year and a half now. it’s nice to remind myself that it wasn’t my fault even tho i can go down a rabbit hole of shame and guilt. ofc i feel sorry for myself but deep down inside me i feel sorry for the other person, i feel like i did something to them for this to happen, making myself believe i deserved it bc i of what i may or may not of done to them. sexual trauma is hard for everyone. no matter your sex everyone struggles. i’ve tried to heal from what happened but already being a pretty anxious person, the sexual trauma doesn’t help. i hope no one has to go thru anything like this and mourn the people who do. i’m here for anyone who has gone thru it, i love you ❤️
I'm a child SA survivor. It happened when I was 5 by a family member, an older cousin. I'm 23 now. And for the longest time, I've had such a warped perspective of myself. My mind over sexualizes everything in the most inappropriate times. I get these horrible intrusive thoughts that I hate myself for. I really do feel like that experience burned something horrible into my psyche. I don't feel like a normal person with the thoughts I have and I wonder sometimes if I'm the only one scarred this way. I know I'm most likely not, but it just feels so lonely dealing with my thoughts and feelings.
Hearing that it's not my fault brought me to tears. Yeah, I've heard that before and I logically know that. But sometimes (Like right now) when I get stuck in the hypersexuality, I just fall down into a pit with it. I guess I really needed that reminder, so thank you for that. And thanks to the TH-cam algorithm for randomly suggesting this video.The worst part is that I enjoy cuddling with my partners, so long as I'm awake. But if I'm asleep and I wake up to feel anything touching against my back or butt, I am just instantly transported back. Even 20 years later.
My Girlfriend shared this channel with me a few days ago. She showed me a video that related to my own trauma growing up. She suffers from sexual trauma. She hurts so much and I don't really know how to help her. I'm here for her and I'm going to see if she will watch this video with me tonight. I want to always be here for her.
My heart goes out to all of SA and my prayers go out to you all in hopes of healing 🙏 Bless You Amanda for everything you do, and everything that you are 🙏💪🤟🌹🤟💪🙏
I was 8. Maybe 9. It was my dad. I knew what was happening, but I didn’t try to stop it at the time. I didn’t want him to be mad, and I didn’t want to get in trouble. I’ve never told anyone, ever. I’ve never spoken about it.
I was SA as a child by an older cousin. It’s affected me my entire life and I ended up on a lot of drugs to numb the pain of it. I am finally clean about a month so far and on medication and therapy for depression and anxiety. The thing that affected me most and most upsets me is that I’ve struggled with relationships because of it. As a teenager I used to tell myself I was not good enough to date and now even as a man I struggle a lot
I’m a survivor of sexual abuse. He was my cousin and I was 4 years old and he was 18. It happened 6 times. 4-7 years old. I’ve been diagnosed c-ptsd, depression, and anxiety . And I usually refuse to talk about my experiences. I can’t let anyone get too close to me. Thank you for making this video. I mainly relate to the dissociation part.
I saw this and let out a long sigh as one of my friends are currently going through that but I’m in England/ the uk and they’re all the way in America so I have to just listen and can’t do anything about it so I’ve promised them that as soon as I’m able to I’ll go and find them. And I plan to keep it that way. I’ll try and try again. I don’t care if I have to go through things I’m terrified of (flying,socialising and facing my depression) just to find and help them. I genuinely threw up when they told me because I was so worried and disgusted to the point I’ve been throwing up almost every day. I’ve been watching this channel a lot recently. I’m gonna send this video to them today.
Yesterday, a longtime friend of mine confided in me about an assault she recently experienced a few days ago and as a survivor, had to set the boundary of taking a brief step back from the conversation to keep myself grounded and set a time for us to revisit the topic since we both became triggered. I’ve been in recovery for a year almost two and am grateful to have been met with support at the time of coming out, but sometimes I have random flashbacks and attacks that feel excruciating.
Thank you for this. I'm currently getting therapy for my depression and anxiety. I think a lot of what I feel is because of the sexual abuse I've suffered throughout my life. Each time was by someone I knew or loved. It's been hard to accept, and I've been going through the stages of grief even though it's been years. Therapy is good, and I think it's necessary no matter how long since the trauma occurred. Don't push it to the past or try to diminish what's happened to you. It will come back in some way. Work through it with a professional. We deserve peace.
It was my husband (now ex husband) and the trial is in January. It's been a year (the awful anniversary was yesterday) and I'm still not anywhere near okay and cycle through panic, grief, and numbness. If it wasn't for my fantastic therapist and the love of my babies I wouldn't even still be here. Sometimes I'll be doing something and have an emotional flashback for seemingly no reason and it's like all the air gets sucked out of my lungs, my throat collapses in with panic, my stomach sinks like being at the top of a steep rollercoaster, tears fill my eyes, and my skin prickles with hot painful goosebumps. It's like my body gets set on fire, but my blood runs ice cold. It's a grief and pain I can't really explain and it knocks the life out of me for hours or days at a time. I've begun disassociating for anywhere from a few minutes to 2-3 days. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone...not even him. I don't feel safe in my own body, not even when I'm alone. It's exhausting and painful to not feel safe or at home in your own skin...like it has red hot brands burning your darkest secrets and humiliations across your body for everyone to see. Nowhere is safe or secure or comforting when your body is an iron maiden prison.
It is crazy when you said that if you have difficulties to trust other to take your time and do it at your own pace I just started sobbing and I realised that I expected you to say something like “Work on yourself and if you struggle, work harder!” Being greeted with your empathy and kindness made me realise again how hard I can be with myself… Thank you so much for this video ♥️♥️♥️ especially for mentioning and explaining hyper sexuality. People often think that survivors are no longer or less interested in sex but often we tend to treat our body and mental health like it was treated by the predator, like it isn’t worth something to keep safe and sound…
ughh,, the flashbacks are the absolute worst--feeling that trauma over and over again along with the panic attacks associated are so hard to deal with most of the time, so hard even to the point where sometimes it's hard to even get out of your bed and do things that you were supposed to/wanted to do that particular day because of either depressive or anxious thoughts consuming your mind. it's nice to feel heard and seen. the statement above is what i have to go through...what makes it worse is the fact that sometimes there isn't even anything that triggers it. for example, i'll be watching a funny cat video and then BAM, next thing I know, I'm curled up and crying to myself because of what happened. to all of the SA survivors (including myself); You all are so strong, and I'm so proud of you for staying alive despite what you went through💙
I think that, from all the psych2go videos that I've watched, this is the one that I needed the most. Glad I found it. I've been ignoring the sexual abuse that I suffered in childhood for years, and now I'm finally doing the work to unpack the feelings and understand how it impacts my life.
Sorry to hear that. We hope this video helped you!
You are such a strong person🩵🫂 It takes a lot of strength to take that on and open those memories we all tried so hard to forget. Sending all my love your way, and I pray you can find your peace❣️
💜🌷 I'm sorry. Me too.
I've been struggling with the effects of being SA'd by my ex brother in law when I was about 14. . I'm so depressed and angry about how this damaged me and my life. What bothers me most is that it effed me up so much that it inadvertantly and negatively affects my two teens. I still am full of self hatred and shame. I thought I'd put this all away but I was triggered about three years ago. I found out that my mom ( who I was super close and enmeshed with) new all along what had happened to me so many years ago and did nothing about it. Never once asked me if I was ok. Never told my dad ( my hero) I didn't know she knew all along and when I found out it broke me and brought it all back. I felt betrayed and so hurt and shocked. It changed my relationship with my mom. She's almost 92 now. There was nothing I could do or say. I couldn't hold her accountable she's too old and I know she didn't intend to hurt me. I think about it every day and try to figure out why I'm so dysfunctional still. I'm 58 and it's killing me on the inside. No one ever acknowledged what happened to me and that hurts as much or more than the actual SA. I absolutely cannot manage my emotions . Im silently full of anger. Thanks for letting me vent.
@@nancyayotte2297I hear you. I'm dealing with my own issues and I seem to be surrounded by people dealing with their own SA. It is very hard to talk about. When people get triggered they tend to just drift away in shame. 💜
Shout out to my men who have been too scared to say anything all their lives, and my women who need the same level of help too
Thanks bro
Thanks blud I needed that
I needed to hear that
thank you
Thanks g
Sexual assault is so hard to talk about, it’s caused me to be hyper sexual at a very very young age. It also caused me to still be hesitant to anyone and everyone. Anytime I would have any sexual intimacy I would have a breakdown, I would have uncontrollable anxiety attacks and shut down. It’s easier now, but I’m in therapy and I am doing my best to get help. It’s hard but it’s possible, I believe in everyone to be able to find closure and peace, whether it happens now or later.
I became hyper aroused at an unnaturally young age as well. Thank you for sharing, I thought I was a pedo or something. No, I never assaulted anyone, but knowing I was sexual when I shouldn't even have noticed my intimate parts yet, yes that made me feel like a weirdo and a pedo. So, thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing this. It seems like your story has resonated with others as well.
I also became hyper aroused at an early age and break down during sexual activity. I think the worst part of being a victim in this situation is if you tell the wrong person about what happened, they’ll do it all over again. My ex did that to me and I haven’t dated anyone since. I’m keeping my eye out for a real man.
i feel exactly the same, and have been experiencing very similar things. im so sorry.
Hello ander 101. Your newest video really portrayed it very well!
As a male who got SAed by my two female cousins who are sisters when I was a kid, I couldn't even remember how old I was when that happened cuz I just realized that I've been trying to forget about it and hide it deep down in my mind but no matter how hard I tried to forget, the flashbacks still haunts me. The first time that it happened is when the older cousin babysitted me along with my grandma. I couldn't remember where my parents and my sister are that time but I remember it was the three of us; me, my cousin, and my grandma. So the three of us are sleeping together in one bed and my cousin gave me a candy and SAed me while grandma is sleeping and told me to be quiet. The second time that it happened is when she was giving me a shower. I don't want to talk about it in full detail but yeah I still remember how it happened. The third SAed I experienced is with my cousin's younger sister who babysitted me as well. She took me in our guest room and it all happened there. For years that went by I felt alone and I didn't talk about it to anyone even with my parents nor my sister cuz I didn't know if they would believe me if I told them. Until we got to leave our country and live abroad when I was 17 and when I turned 18 that's when I told my mom everything that happened. All she did was cry while she listened to my stories. Now I'm 23 years old and I'm doing much better now but I'm still healing slowly day by day. It is not an easy thing to go through especially in childhood years. I wouldn't even expect to even share this online like even now I'm fighting my tears to type this story. I may forgive and heal but I can never forget that ugly and disgusting experience. It is just like a wound that heals but leaves you with an ugly scar.
Edited: Thank you for the nice and uplifting comments❤️
You are so brave for sharing it. You have people in your life that will support you. I'm sorry you went trough all of that
I have no idea who you are but your story brought me to tears. You should have never experienced that and man I hope you heal and just flourish dude.
You will get through this, I believe in you!
@@diananeeley865658 thank you I appreciate it❤️
I understand and I'm so sorry you've suffered these wounds too.
I send virtual feelings of support and solidarity from afar.
I'm F 29, and have dealt with a number of instances from 5 to 26, the recent patches from the first partner I trusted to begin the process of physical intimacy. I stated clearly having trauma in those areas and needing to take things slowly, I blocked out for a year that he ignored me but didn't know why I was ever able to say no or enforce a line again until my memories came back. Once I remembered and talked through it he was really shocked that what he'd done was assualt and ended up sobbing because he realised he'd done that at some point in basically every relationship he'd had.
I hope he got his head right and takes consent seriously, but I know I can't hold myself responsible for teaching people what consent is, they should care enough and understand the prevalence enough to self educate and communicate.
If you have any issues with partners in the future, I want you to know that's fully on them. You deserve people who see your safety as sacred. I strongly recommend following some sex therapists on social media (the expansive group on insta has really helped me).
You always deserved better and I'm very glad you're away from these people now. This is always serious and should never happen to any children or anyone.
I’m a gay guy that went through this at the hands of my 3 year relationship with a guy I thought was my world, he destroyed me in so many ways and left me to pick up the pieces
Your suffering should never have been silenced and I’m so sorry you had to go through something like this-it breaks something and no matter what you do you always feel that crack deep down that you can’t fix, but you are a trooper, your still here alive and fighting, don’t repress these memories out of fear of judgement, sharing a problem halves it, trusted friends or family members or even strangers on the internet like you’ve done now-you’ve managed to come a long way and not let it define you it doesn’t define any of us. There are sadly just some terrible people in the world and they take advantage of weakness,kindness, trust and loyalty hold your head up high knowing you lived to tell your story and that your experience didn’t completely consume you. Keep hanging in there bud we got this shit
6:29
“There’s a version of us from before the trauma that we can never get back”
This brought me to tears man, I was so young
Damn that hits hard
That's the part that started me crying too. I'm so sorry.
Me too
@@Raccoonboi634 i am really done with this drama i hope I don't lose it
@@Raccoonboi634 same, i was 5
I don't remember my sexual assault, but I experienced it. I forgot it at a self-defense mechanism. I still have trauma, and I physically cannot bring myself to feel sexual desire for another person. Even if you don't remember, you are valid.
How u forgot...what kind of self defence mechanisms pls tell
@@tribenidas2252 it was actually a psychological response to the trauma it caused, coupled with the fact that I was three to four.
@@Ms.Delirious that's right! when you are around 2 to 3 years old (wil vary from person to person) everything before that age, you don't remember. Scientist still don't know why we don't have memories before that age...
Plus it is indeed a psychological response to protect yourself from the hard feelings accompanied by the memories. I'am so happy to hear that you know that your experience is valid, even if you don't remember. It must be really frustrating to experience those problems. Strong that you share your experience here @ psy2go
@@tribenidas2252 It's called repression. That is a psychological concept from Anna Freud. People repress the memory to a place where we are no longer aware of it's existence or a little bit aware of it, but it still causes problems from that place that bother us. That's what the theory says, but know that every experience is an individual story that is different for everyone...
⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠Same here until I had a dream 6 years ago and everything clicked...i was at school pre-school I've been trying to find someone to blame...once the dream happened I realized there was no-one alive to blame those ppl aren't even alive anymore...
I remember having lots of nightmares wetting and always wanting to touch myself...
Awful world we live in
Why is it so underrated? Like, I watched this video not because I have experience, but to understand that problem better
Why do you think it's underrated?
We hope this video is helpful! I wonder if it got flagged by TH-cam due to the sensitive nature of the topic
Nice ofp
maybe because it was released 13 minutes ago
Same
“Was it my fault?” Asked the short skirt.
“No, it happened to me too” replied the burka.
The diaper in the corner couldn’t even speak.
-Darshan Mondkar
My favorite quote on this topic.
Hearing some of your stories makes me wonder about what we’re teaching people (or not teaching) to make anyone think non consensual interactions are okay. It’s not about men or women at this point. This is about humanity. And it’s a terrifying world to live in.
Never seen that quote before, simple and to the point, thanks
Man the fact that this quote is literally true makes it even more sad and terrifying 😢
Truth
That quote hits me so hard, I'm in tears, thank you for sharing it..
@@jesterennard6797 take care of yourself ❤️
It doesn't even have to be non-consensual to mess you up, being too young, impaired, toxic behaviors, and many other things will also impact you. This topic needs much more awareness spreading, thanks for doing the good work.
So so true. Thank you for this comment
Those are all forms of non-consent. Minors can’t give legal consent. NO ONE impaired can give legal consent. Depending on what you mean by toxic behaviors, if they’re behaviors to get sex out of someone who doesn’t want to consent… then it’s not consent.
Ty for saying this I'm someone who has been taken advantage of and lured into doing sexual activities even though i didn't want to...i experienced toxicity as well
Completely agree! I have for a long time been blaming myself, and felt so ashamed of it. Even though it was never my fault, because I was too young to understand. They are the ones that are taking advantage of you, they are the adult and the one's that manipulating you into it... I want you to be aware though that even if it kinda "feels" like it was "consensual", it never was..! Because a child CAN'T EVER give consent! they're too young to do that. So the blame is ONLY on the perpetrator, and NEVER the victim.
Sending you love
yea, for me, it was communication issues. I was focusing too much on a clear yes or no I ignored every other way ny ex tried to signal to stop. I was devastated when I realized what I had done. we talked it out and came to the conclusion it was a communication error, months go by and everything was alright. then beginning of this year, I found out they told one of their friends during the time it happened (I'm not mad, nor do I blame them, they don't have the best mental health), and that friend of theirs blurted it out to a group of people I'm not well acquainted with, for lack of better words. and after that I just broke it off because it was too much weight for me.
please do be careful with bodily signals and don't completely focus on a clear yes or no, be aware of everything, especially if they suffer from mental issues and can't communicate clearly.
Someone i know (Gf) was in a toxic relationship with her ex before she met me. It hurts me to know that her ex not only abused her, but SA'ed her as well. It burns me to the core that she had to go through that and carry that burden for a year. I was even surprised that she trusted me enough to confess to me. We're already 10 months in and i can say its not easy to handle someone with this type of trauma, but i still love her for who she is. I already committed to carrying this weight with her, and i will not stop until she is finally healed
Hope she will be healed soon
W partner 🙌
she is lucky to have you
She trusts you.
I almost cried seeing this, i was victim of SA and got Hypersexuality, at a young age. I never told anyone about this but my Boyfriend. My abuser was my cousin, so i always see him in family reunions. My bf always take care of me and help me with anxiety attacks, he always told me that it was not my fault and is helping me to overcome with the Hypersexuality and all of this trauma.
Hey, I have the same past I was abused sexually and physically twice and I have hypersexuality too. How do you overcome
@Daisydrool I try to distract myself or my boyfriend does, having thoughs that you don't want is horrible, so my boyfriend watch something with me or distracts me by having a conversation, or playing together, things that keep your mind ocupied on something else.
The last time we read a book and we talked about it until I was better, that really helps a lot. He is my hero.
Lucky you to have a supportive partner. Mine knows about my trauma and uses po*n against me
Hello, an incest survivor here!
I had to suffer in silence because I can't open up to people about my SA experience, my mom did this when I was 5 months old, and then again at 12, I didn't tell anyone because I know that they will downplay my trauma or joke about it saying "Mother-Daughter incest doesn't exist" or something like that, I'm 13 and I still have to live with mom, I am trying to protect my little sister from SA and I am also trying to heal from my trauma despite my abuser being here
Oh my god 😟😟 thats so sad. Do your father knows this??
You ARE believed. I believe you. I am sorry. 😞
I’m so sorry to hear this. U are heard
Thank you so much ya'll, I am okay
Keep fighting on honey and protect your sister. Hope all goes well to you, you are very brave and strong. I'm so sorry that happened to you.
I was sexually assaulted when I was a young boy, by my brother and it still hurts me to this day. I have never told anyone about this or the problems its caused me the main problem its caused is I developed problems with people touching me. A lot of people don't know that sexual assault can happen to man and not many people know it can happen to young boys. Its not just woman of young girls it happens to everyone and it happens without warning. if you've been sexually assaulted when you were young know that your not alone.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. ❤
I hope you are doing well and I am so sorry that happened to you. Can't really covey this with words, but yeah, I wish you the best.
@@AroAceGaming2116 Thank you for sharing your experience. It can be encouraging to many sufferers who have been afraid to tell their story. You have a purpose.
Yeah, it happens to anyone regandless of gender and it should be recognized more.
It can happen to anyone at anytime I was sexually assaulted when I was 10 by my “brother” I don’t think he’s is now after the possibility of me being pregnant with his kid
Spirituality is creating your own reality by learning from your stepping stones and raising your vibration to be your best self and achieve your mission goals in this lifetime.
actually this makes alot sense to me... i kind of live like that whithout even being aware of the tradition. it just feels natural to me... i mean most religions are more about power and control then anything else ... they lost the essence ... think those 4 core principles are the essence and also the reason why its just healthy to choose to live by thees
"values". ...
...being spiritual not religeous... doing
the right thing for the greater good not just for personal gain... no need to live on your knees as long you dont put those close to you down. dont be so greedy. there would be enough for all of us... but yo i guess every herd got its black sheep but the european mind is more down whith the devil, the EGO ... false light blindet by there beauty lol.
..who are the real
Savages? not everything that shines is gold... the devil is a liar. no matter which shade of brown or whatever... positiv giving or Negative taking...
balance just some thoughts and thnx for providing these infos. PEACE out & greetings from Germany
Please can someone recommend any spiritual therapist?
Yes, Dhitik_scott.
Is she on TikTok?
Yes, she is.
I’m 57.. learned to stay silent throughout the years… and still feel broken😔😢
We hear you💜
This is a very important topic. Many would call it taboo, but it should NOT be seen this way.
Every victim of SA of any form , any gender , any age is valid.
Thanks for the support. We will work on more videos like this.
I can't believe I've been grieving my younger self all these years and i didn't notice it. When i became an artist and i used a ton of my childhood shows as my inspiration. I didn't know i was subconsciously soothing myself, i was just using them to get better
I have persistent depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, ptsd, adhd, and autism. I am a victim of childhood SA. It wasn't r*pe but only because I escaped by a miracle. This video hit hard and is so true. I have sexual avoidance and pain if I try.
I went through a traumatic experience during a past relationship related to sex. Now, I even question my sexuality because I lost interest in any form for the opposite sex
You just told my story exactly. God bless you 💜😇
I think the one that I fought my way out of probably impacted me the hardest. Just because they were not successful does not mean it shouldn't impact you or as much.
I still find myself minimizing it or re-framing it as 'other people didn't have a chance to fight or to resist'.
And sometimes I still wonder if I would have been a different person for these last 18 years, if I had let it happen, or pushed myself to comply with the woman's advances before she recruited two other people - all whom I thought of as friends - to assist her in drugging me and then attacking me.
What really hurts is that I was actually so happy leading up to when she arrived, as the other two arrived one by one and brought me 'gifts' - I can remember thinking wow, this is so nice, these people are being nice to me and brought me things and like me enough to do so. I was smiling and happy and at that point, it meant a lot to me and I thought I was having a really good day
@@elizabethmariavasquez6464 It makes it so confusing sometimes.
@@Murdoch-ck8mv I'm so sorry that happened to you. You're strong and valid.
I was only in elementary when I went through COCSA(child on child sexual assault) and he was my cousin younger than me by just one year… I always and I still kinda do blame myself,
“I was the oldest I should’ve said something”
“You’re both cousins this is disgusting”
“Why is did he do that to me?”
“I’m scared to tell him to stop”
“I’m just gonna let him do this, it’s not like it’s hurting maybe I’m just being a crybaby?”
“I don’t want him to touch me there”
“Why is he laughing at me like this, why does he like this?”
All these questions and stuff I told myself at the time and I wanted to tell my mom but I couldn’t, I knew she’d believe me but my cousin was on my dads side of the family and his family back eachother up no matter what… even when they knew my dad abused my mom, sexually, verbally, emotionally, physically, and I had to watch it all so when I wanted to tell my mom… “ if I tell her papi will hurt her and maybe me… I don’t want mami to get hurt again…. It’s ok, maybe he will stop doing this to me soon” I told myself that. And it never went more than touching but eventually he began to start kissing me… tongue and everything… it was fucking disgusting I felt so gross I hated it I hated my life I hated myself and I wanted to die… i was only in elementary and yet I had thoughts of offing myself… eventually we stopped visiting my cousin and his mom and I haven’t seen them since but I still feel disgusting and embarrassed and ashamed… and the worst part is I told my parents this year, my mom cried and said she went through the exact same situation as a kid and she was hoping she could protect me from that and then she said “I’m so sorry… I failed… I failed you as a mom” I cried because how would she have known but my dad…. “I’m sorry but you’re just gonna have to forget about it… I mean it already happened so just stop thinking about it and move on”…. No tears… no apology… nothing…. I’ve been dealing with my hyper sexuality because of my cousin I always thought maybe I’d stop but I’m 16 now and I’m still dealing with it…
And that’s my story about my SA… COCSA survivors rarely ever come out because of people like my dad
“Oh well you were both just kids”
“He’s just a kid he couldn’t have known better”
“He’s a boy he was probably curious”
And it hurts… it hurts that so many kids not only have to fear the adults but even the kids their age… and I’m sorry to all survivors of sa we deserved better and know it’s never your fault and it never will be and I hope you all have healed or are healing from, it doesn’t matter your gender or age or anything your story is still and will always be valid, you ARE valid♥️
honey, i am so incredibly sorry that you went through all of that. i pray you find healing and peace and that each abuser in your family receives justice. when i was reading through your story, i realized our’s have a resemblance. i was 6 while he was 5. it was halloween night and me and my cousins and sister went to my room to play. he tried to force both me, my 4 year old sister and his 7 year old sister to sit, bare, on his face. i did it. everything in me felt so ashamed, felt so disgusted, felt so humiliated. i resisted at first, trying to leave the room. he physically pulled me back and manipulated me to do it. he said it felt good. at 5 years old. before i knew it, my 9 year old cousin came into the room and scolded me, telling me that what i did was very bad and that it was all my fault. he did this to me and his sister at least 1 other time. for years, i’ve held that in my memory, feeling so ashamed of it and thinking it was my fault. i opened up to my mom about it and she didn’t treat it as SA. COCSA gets so pushed under the rug. no one wants to admit that it happened nor do they want to believe that it happens. and it’s that much worse if it’s a family member. i’m sorry for the both of us and i hope that we can heal 🫶🏻
Exciting video, A year ago i took the no contact route, well i wouldn't say it didn't go well, but i missed her and sometimes you have to leave your comfort zone and go for what you want, Without knowing and having a huge ego, we might actually miss out on our soul mate all in the name of not settling for less, I know who i am, and at the same time i know what i want for me, so i did all i could to get her back, and I must say, it was the best decision i have ever made, we have been together again for over 7 months, yes marriage isn't always Rosey, but i am lucky to have her, just as she is, to have me, we compliment each other
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i am in a similar situation, and i do not know what else do to have him back, i have been dying inside, people actually think i am happy, i am not.
I feel your pain, sister. after trying out the no contact experiment that failed miserably, i had to find other means, i had to reach out to a spiritual adviser, it was brilliant idea which i never thought it was, but it worked wonders for me.
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach him/ her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
As someone who was sexually abused at the ages of 4, 10 and 14 years old. It is a traumatic experience that can affect the rest of your life, if you are not aware of it. You must practice developing the awareness of how the trauma may have affected you. Because otherwise, you will be unconsciously responding to the trauma.
So true. What happened to me was too much, and I repressed it all for a long time. Even thought I wasn't thinking about it or aware of it, the fallout from the abuse was clear, and I had a host of mental illness problems that I wasn't properly accepting or adapting to. Now I know why I make the choices I do, and how to steer it better.
❤😢
@@fen4554❤😢
Thank for sharing your thoughts on it! I clicked to understand better. What I can say from myself is that after processing anything severe happening to you, you gain much power afterwards and resilience. It surely takes time. 💚
I also suffered from this in my childhood My own cousin brothers and My uncle used to sexually assault me and now they behave like nothing is wrong with them.. The same uncle tries to SA my small sister but I immediately recognize it and tell my parents about it. They just get angry but never confront him because of a damn shame. I never tell them about myself but I can't stand the same thing happening with my sister.. I also feel so threatened and suffer from nightmares from time to time. I still fear them I don't want to sit with them but I have to see them and smile.
It hurts worse when you're told filing a report won't do anything. There will be no investigation. There will be no justice. If you do file, expect a lot of insensitive questions from the police.
After dealing with it, we have to do the work and heal. We are the ones who have to undergo this change, but not the person who committed the crime.
Also, when people say, "you're so strong for surviving." NO. Please, stop saying that. It hurts so much. It sounds like a badge of honor we received. We are not strong because we survived this situation. We were ALWAYS strong - long before we were harmed.
I can relate. I’m sorry it went down that way for you too. It’s a nightmare and it’s all unfair. ❤
Police don't care and will mock you and make it clear they have no intent on doing anything about. It more times than not they all protect each other than actually seek justice. The women in high roles are worse bc they get a pick me status for helping men get away with the crimes and will get promotions and more slack in other areas where other men wouldn't get bc of this bc women defending male abusers seems crazy and really heightens the protection in the mix of the messed up things.
Sexual abuse keep the system going. Most people do most crimes bc of past sexual abuse. Courts would be cleared out if they actually reacted to sexual abuse and pedophilia properly. The abusers no they will get away with and the odds of any sort of consequences of any sort are significantly higher than anything occuring.
Amen. You definitely were strong before. The war doesn't make the arrow strong that survived, it destroys every arrow that isn't and shows which one is! Trauma HURT. There is no bright side. It destroys some people and only the strong survive.
You’re completely right and thank you for noting the “strong” comments. I know people mean well and they just don’t know how to respond, because there is not a right thing to say.
But to anyone reading this, a good place to start might be to let the survivor see that you feel for them. When I’ve told people my story, and they’ve cried on my behalf, it’s been the most validating part of my experience. Cry for them, with them, give them a hug and let them feel how much it sucks. It will get better, but they don’t need someone to tell them that, they need time to see it.
I reported my inflictor and in the police interview I told them that the reason I reported was because if it wasn’t me, it would have been someone else, and if it is someone else after me, and they decide to report too, at some point someone will have to do something. That, and I needed to feel like I did something to prevent it from happening to someone else, and that was my closure.
This behavior is not okay, and I don’t think society spends enough time talking about why this happens addressing the root cause of the motives of these behaviors. We live in a victim centered world, and survivors need all the support, still I believe if we lived in a Perpetrator centered world, or even just shifted it a bit, we could make progress in actually lowering the rates of abuse.
For anyone this might help, people who assault others do so for the need to grasp control most of the time. Researching the motives did help me make sense of it, and this stuff doesn’t happen for no reason. Abusers are not born, they’re made.
This isn’t in the interest of offering compassion or excusal of behavior for this disgusting atrocity of an action. It’s just an explanation for why, and maybe an insight on how it might be prevented. (Prevented in terms of healing from wounds that elicit these behaviors. I in no way believe or am saying that it is anyone else’s job to prevent assault. It’s no one’s fault but the person who decided to do the thing.)
And finally, whatever you believe in, know that karma is real, you’ll get yours and it will heal and nourish and replenish your soul, and they’ll get theirs… and it will be as it should be in the end. I’m sorry you went through your experience or know someone who has. Know that it isn’t your job to do anything but heal and love yourself.
The last part is so real and true to me… I feel the same way, I feel a sadness and pain in my heart when someone says that to me, about being “strong”. That’s not what I want to be told. I didn’t want to be strong, I’m not proud of that, I just wanted to be protected.
my ex suffers from such trauma during her teenage years, i saw how a flashback can drastically impact ones behaviour, how SA ruined both her past and our relationship along with her trust issues, not just to others but also herself. All of the self blaming, anorexia. uneased feeling, hatred toward intimacy...and not to mention the pain she bared, one cant imagine such a young girl having to carry that weight on her back. To her i would say sorry for not being to support her in any meaningful way. And i wish you will be able to not only heal but also better your current and future life, remember it was not your fault in any way, shape of forms
❤ You maybe her ex, but a kind and caring one.
I think it is incredible that our mind can forget things or hide them away from us in order to protect us, its just really hard when you recover all the memorys again. But its a really surreal feeling when you realize that it was in fact an actual memory
It is incredible and so very difficult. I have PTSD from an assault that happened 18 years ago. I saw the guy and stood near him and talked to him this summer. I was SO uncomfortable but couldn’t figure out why. I was in PTSD from that moment but of course didn’t realize it for months. It took so long for me to put the memory together. I went through rape trauma syndrome and still have fairly severe PTSD. It’s been 6 months since I saw him. Anyway all that to say yes, it’s wild how we have to reconstruct traumatic memory, and also so devastating 💔
" The tree remembers, but the AX forgets"
As a male SA survivor I just wanted to tell you, thank you. It's hard to live like I used too before, especially when my friends had left me for my SA'er. I'm left with nothing, but I'm trying to push on, but it's hard. My SA'er lives 600m from my house and will be attending the same school as me for another two years. I'm trying to move on, but it's hard. If anyone of you also struggles with it, try to seek professional help, but please, keep this in mind that not every therapist is a good therapist and sometimes you have to find another one. Try to find one that is qualified in SA trauma, because I wasn't lucky enough and didn't found the right one. If your therapist victim blames you just leave, because you will need a bigger Therapy after session with therapist like this than before.
I've been SA'd both physically and verbally a few times over the last few years. No actual cases of intxrcxxrse but it still hurts. I tried to tell people but nobody did anything, people shut me down saying "no, you weren't", "you're a man, not a girl" or "to man up". I wouldn't say I'm "traumatised", more so "emotionally numbed". At this point, I haven't bothered telling anybody about it since the last time, because nothing gets done. :/
The worst bit is I don't even know who the people were, so even if someone would listen, they'll never actually be held accountable for their actions... I just hope they don't do it to someone else...
The only real "common sign" I have is just an aversion to touch in general
That’s so fucking disgusting,they seriously think girls can only get SA‘ed?
I wish you luck on healing❤
Btw,You have such a cute PFP:D
What animal is that in your PFP?
Thank you for putting C-PTSD first in the list of possible impacts of SA. It's so awful that it's in the ICD-11, but because it's not in the DSM, the USA hardly recognizes it. This means that children who grow up with SA and survivors of long term intimate violence don't get the help we really need.
I struggle to talk about this with anyone because I’m afraid it doesn’t “classify” as SA. When I was younger 7-10 my parents would do the “deed” while I was on the same bed. This occurred several times, and I lost trust within myself. I felt numb and disgusted with myself, and I struggle to get close with other people, including my own family. I’ve always hated physically touch, like hugging other people and stuff. I never knew why but only till this year I only realized why I hated it. Thank you for helping me feel heard and understood. If you relate to my story, I’m always here to hear others stories.
That certainly classifies as SA, it can be very harmful to be exposed to such things at a very young age, I am so sorry this happened to you. Hope you're doing well and can heal.
@@334...4 thank you sm for the support, and yes Im healing in the process .
@lw9515 thank you for the response, this helps me understand why I’ve always felt like this. Thanks again.
That's terrible, your parents shouldn't be exposing you to that, that definitely counts as some type of sexual abuse in my opinion
If it made you feel uncomfortable, that's a form of SA.
My close friend assaulted me when I was 15 and he was 17. We were next to my best friend camping an hour away from my home. I had to go through a whole night hoping my best friend wouldn't wake up. Watching this video made me cry. You say so many supportive words and it was really lovely to hear. I hope anyone that's been through sexual trauma knows it's not your fault. If you say no, say nothing or say yes but change your mind later on, it's not your fault.
I have experienced SA in early infancy. It extended throughout my childhood, and ended when I was a teenager. To grapple with the fact that my body was “more sexualized” as a child than it was an adult, was something no living being should ever have to endure. I struggle to heal every day. I struggle to sleep every night. Thank you for making this video, and so many others, for it is more impactful than I can propely explain.
i do ot have any sexual trauma but when Psych2go said these "it was not your fault", "you are not to blame" a tear fell down. i hope people who experience these trauma i hope you will love yourself and heal even if its slow dont give up you are worth it anda you are precious and there are people maybe not many but there is someone who will be there for you adn listen to your worry and troubles. english is not my first language and im not a very comfroting person but just know that all im saying is dont give up
Thank you so much ❤
I was sexually assaulted by 4 women, 2 of them family, one a caregiver, mostly between 3 and 6.
You are alone. Nobody will help you. Learning the lesson that screaming only excites the predator is one of the hardest things to go through. I don't even have a therapist I can open up to and I have 2. Offenders get a release date, we do not.
i’m so sorry. its not much but im sending u love and healing energy💗
@@hicknopunk That is intensely painful. I hope you will find a safe person to open up to. I know it isn't easy. But going it alone is not the way out.
@@victoryamartin9773 i do have 5 online friends. 2 I can talk to about what happened, but they are as damaged as I am
Thank you for sharing. It's never easy. So sorry this happened to you. You didn't deserve any of what happened to you. As a survivor of years of sexual abuse by people who were suppose to love and protect me, I emphasise with you.
It hurts, it really hurts and being alone and no one to talk to makes things seem worst.
I hope you find someone , a therapist you can click with. Keep going until you can find that person. Baby steps, in your own time, your younger self needs you to be strong enough for the both you ❤ Take care
you are not alone
Thank you for not excluding men. We have no place to turn when it happens to us. Being seen means the world.
❤❤ you are seen.
❤
Exactly as said above. You are seen, and your experiences and trauma are completely valid. Never let anyone tell you otherwise ❤️🫂
I was SAed by my grandma, I also was betrayed by my old friends, who would climb on top of me and try to do stuff to me. This video made me feel comfort or, at peace with the feeling it wasn’t my fault. Thanks for making this video!
Man... Where do I even start?...
I'm 22 years old and just now learning to talk about my issues with my therapists.
Been seeing one since I was 6 or 7 after what happened to me but for some reason I couldn't talk about anything that happened to me, hell it felt like I couldn't comprehend that I had been SA'd until I was 21.
I spent time in foster care too, I was abused by a foster parent for 2 and a half years then a long with that I went through probably 4 therapists within that time period and for again, I couldn't comprehend that I was being abused, it was like I thought it was normal to be abused so I never said anything.
Even now at 22 years old I'm just now comprehending that happened, these videos help, a lot of videos on TH-cam have made me realize a lot about myself and my issues.
Just hope I can make it through life...
I've been crying since the moment I saw the notification,this means so much for me. The fact about the mental consequences and the part about hypersexuality - sexual avoidance, made me so relieved to understand. For the first time I don't think there's something fundamentally wrong with me so thank you again.
Please ignore this, I'm already very greatful for this, but does this also apply to victims of long-term sexual harassment/assault victims as well?
Knowing there are people who invalidate the horrors of SA and the traumas with them is sickening. I honestly validate those pains. The horrors are real and denying them is ridiculous.
do u count porn as sexual trauam
@yungdemonslayer888 Yeah, it can depending on the situation.
my own therapist did that when I was 12
People who haven't gone through this will never know and understand the impact it has on victims/ survivors. Everything she points out there is real not fake , people go through this unfortunately not everyone understands and shows empathy.
I was sa'ed when I was 11 by my uncle. It actually opened my mind after everything. I remember praying before everything happened. I talked and said to God, "Please, protect me from any devils and harm while I'm sleeping". But then, things happened and it made me lost my faith. I remember feeling guilt, shame and dirty after. I also tried to h4ng myself but my mom caught me.
I also suffered from this in my childhood My own cousin brothers and My uncle used to sexually assault me and now they behave like nothing is wrong with them.. The same uncle tries to SA my small sister but I immediately recognize it and tell my parents about it. They just get angry but never confront him because of a damn shame. I never tell them about myself but I can't stand the same thing happening with my sister.. I also feel so threatened and suffer from nightmares from time to time. I still fear them I don't want to sit with them but I have to see them and smile...
Don't lose hoope We can't hurt ourselves because of some lusty monsters
@@Messy1111 You can call CPS and report this anonymously if you want. They can remove these monsters so you can be safe.
Seems like God couldn't do anything.
Sadly, God doesn’t take away anybodies free will, even if they are choosing to do something bad with it…He can’t stop a bad person from making a bad choice.
But I know God would’ve cried with you and felt your pain and it probably breaks his heart when he sees his creations being horrible to others. A misconception about God is that he can and should stop all evil in the world, but he can’t. But evil will face the consequences eventually.
God still loves you and is there to help you heal from things. He doesn’t stop things but he can and does comfort you and help you deal with them.
It was not your fault, you aren’t dirty, and your uncle is a horrible person to do that. I hope you’ve been able to heal and learn to deal with things, no matter if you ever turned back to god or not.
@@IAmNot-Everywhere-God can’t take away the agency of others to make a choice. He is bound by the free will he gave to man-he gave us the gift of choosing for ourselves, but unfortunately people choose evil instead of good sometimes. So yeah, he couldn’t stop the bad choice of a bad man….but not because he’s not there or not powerful enough. It’s just because he can’t step in and stop every single bad thing. That’s why he sent Jesus to give us a way to be resurrected and healed from all the bad things that happened to us.
Ive forgotten my sexual assault from childhood, and i myself cannot remember any of it. But i do know it happened, i believe my brain is trying to protect me, or either i was just too young to really remember. Multiple things after that first incident, have happened. Family, close family friends, my friends, my friends family.. things have continued for me. But around the age of probably 10 for me i finally understood why i acted the way i did, and now that im 18, i continue to struggle with everything youve listed, emotional wise. I have no medicine, no therapy, and this video has helped me more than any of those things listed have. I appreciate you. Thank you.
As a survivor of multiple SA as a child, i still struggle with nightmares about my SA, and i feel like the hardest thing I've conquered in life was finally telling my family about what happened and receiving support. i used to act out and be violent when i was younger, and yes, it was a pathetic cry for help, but i was a child with a disability trying to understand why. Anyone who is an SA survivor male female nonbinary you are not alone, and it wasn't your fault ❤
I was SA'd by an abusive ex for two years, when I was 13-14 and he was 17-18. I'm a bit older now, have been in a healthy relationship with a wonderful guy for almost a year but my trauma still affects me to this day. I thought I had done a great deal of healing, but when I'm in a situation where I want to say "no" to the person I love, even knowing that he's my safe space and will always respect me, I feel scared. He makes me feel so loved, appreciated, comfortable, respected and secure, but sometimes I still feel scared, for something that happened long ago. It's so frustrating. Thank you for talking about this.
I'm happy that you're better and I hope you get better. Take care of yourself 🫶🏽
@@Data_nothuman I'm trying my best to heal and know what I deserve, thank you for that! ❤️
Thank you. This helps me understand my girlfriend a little more. It's not easy, but I'm here for her
She's lucky to have a parter who is willing to understand her.
We need more people like u, understanding and kind
One of my biggest fears is to fall in love with someone and they kick me out of their lives because I'd been SA'ed. Your comment gives me comfort that one day, it's possible that someone will love me and not blame me for it
You are heaven sent for her💯
@@Rickroller-z4iyes🩵
I was a victim of SA at the age of thirteen my stepdad started abusing me in this way. It went for three years before I told people what he was doing on a semi regular basis. It can get better you all are amazing people and you deserve so much more
Are you okay now
Are you okay now
@@17spaghetti8fries yeah I'm doing better
Are you ok?
As a survivor of SA I grew up with my abuser and it happened for many years. We're actually working on getting diagnosed with DID due to this. I'm sure there's more abuse I endured but I don't remember it all. It's hard and I'm here for anyone here.❤️
It has a huge impact on our spiritual lives as well
I was SA’d by a member of my own family when I was 6-7. I still remember everything. And yet I still had to see this person every day of my life up until I was 18, when I moved abroad. I feel I’ve never developed normal relationships and friendships since, though I’ve suffered many other additional childhood traumas I think this one has impacted me the most as a person. I wouldn’t wish this on anybody
Speaking as someone who was healing from Sexual Trauma and had been retraumatized fairly recently, I appreciate the topic being tackled with respect. I still remember how most of it happened, and I felt upset with myself that I didn't recognize what was going on... But... Then I realized that, this video is right, no one deserves for that situation to happen to them, and to be gaslit by people around them to the point they wonder if they are just overreacting. Those are feelings you have, and it's fine. They are for you to work through.
Timestamps
1). Sex 1:34
2). Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) 2:56
3). Trust and intimacy issues 3:34
4). Depression and anxiety 3:57
5). Self-esteem and body image 4:24
6). Dissociation and emotional numbing 4:43
7). Sexual dysfunction 5:09
8). Flashback and triggers 5:47
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
❤❤❤TE AMO HAPPY PRIDE FOR LIFE FROM YOUR FAVORITE SEXY ASS DJS LOVE IN & OUTTA DA CLUBS
I started crying happy tears at the end when you were telling us it’s not our fault, this video made me see things differently and I’m crying right now thank you so much I hope the best for you.
I get it.. any kind of trauma can be painful but I do feel like we shouldn't compare them to decide what's more painful 0:14
Hello I am Cherri, I am a member of a system. This video triggered me to the front, and I fronted for the host to watch this video to protect them from unwanted memories. I am a survivor of SA and Ash (the host) does not know about this. I try my hardest to shield them from it. They do not remember and nobody knows about this trauma, I keep it to myself. You don’t need to read this by the way, this is for Ash to read. It was in a preschool playground, their ex-friend pulled them behind a wall and kissed them, restraining them so they could not get away. This time in their life is very important because the entire system is starting to process these so called “false memories” and even me myself am not sure if these things ever happened. I am aware that an unwanted make out session is not the worst form of SA but it should definitely be acknowledged.
Sincerely, Cherri
Good luck all
@@sadrabbit53 ty
Thank you for opening up about this experience. I've gone through something similar and I often cannot take myself serious that I'm so "hung up" on it. I hope this form of SA will be more spoken about and acknowledged with time.
@@yokhonart Same here. It feels like, I don't deserve to hurt, compared to everyone. And when I opened up to someone I trusted, I was told to get over it. It's so blurry. That's the worst part. It's so "little" and I barely remember it that I doubt myself. All these "would've, should've"s just don't leave. But I hurt all the same like everyone else.
It’s been 9 years and I still have flashbacks, and still think of it everyday. But I got a good ending, it took four long and shitty years, but I got my abuser in jail
YAYYYY im so happy
It wasn’t your fault, I’m so proud of you. Friend.
mine died, it was my father
How did you get justice? I can't get justice, even though I reported it and got a case number. It was 10 years ago.
@ I reported it 3 years after it happened, I somehow managed to tell it when I was 10 years old, because I was so young I didn’t go though the details of it being pushed through. In total, it took 4 years of near daily anxiety and stress before he got put in jail, even when my case was active. I was told that my case was far from normal and should have not taken nearly as long as it did
Hey, I just wanted to say, this is honestly really informational and I'm glad you guys posted this.
As someone who's a survivor, I want to say you guys aren't alone, and you can get through this, even if it might be difficult. I experienced S/A from my dad at a young age, and never realized it was wrong because people thought he was just joking around, when in reality it wasn't how someone should have acted towards me at all, especially my own father. I know it was hard to realize for me that it was wrong, but once you do it really helps you start to accept and stop excusing the behavior of an abuser you may have. They may have a good reputation, or everybody around you might love them, but it's still wrong. It took me a while to realize that, but it's something many have to in order to start healing. I'm still in the house, with my older sister and other siblings, but I've been able to do my best to protect them and myself. It's hard, but you can get through this.
Incest is something that people frown upon, but the thing is, is when it happens to someone usually people don't wanna believe it. For example, when my family found out because I had reached out to the police (which they didn't do anything about, saying that it's not mol*station if there's no pen*tration,) they started blaming me, and denying my dad would do that. Now, I know they're wrong, and no matter what someone tells you, it isn't normal.
You're strong, and you can get through this, I'm going to move out in the future when I can, and I know all of you can get out of those situations eventually. You're strong, and you don't deserve what happened to you. You're valid.
NO ONE EVER DESERVED ABUSE!!!
EVER!!❤❤❤❤❤
But sadly I got groomed from Snapchat
Groom means sexual from little children’s and girls or boys.
Thank you for this; as someone who is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse leading into almost all my adult life of abuse, I needed this. It took up to the last 4 years to start working on myself. I still have setbacks, and I do beat myself up about it, but I know that I can't hold it against myself either; it's a journey that I will always be healing from.
As an autistic trans woman; S.H and S.A. have been a big part of my life ... I often feel broken,alone, desperate, help/hopeless
Thank you for this video ♡
stay strong sis
@copeseethe3764 ♡ thank you
I'm a trans man and it's the same for me too. I hope you're doing well ❤️
@KLIIJ0YS i really hope you re doing well too , it s unfair we had to go through this ... ♡
Me too and I’m a TM
It took me YEARS to even question the possibility of me suffering of this trauma. It is indeed a matter of small things adding up and then slow burning deep in my psyche. I’ll bring it up to my therapist soon. Thank you so much for this video. It helped me understand this trauma better and identify it.
I've talked to my sexual trauma and mistreatment from others and she was very supportive. She said that as long as I talk to other's that I trust and set boundaries, sticking with them and keep fighting, I'll be okay and be more comfortable with my body. I even told my boyfriend about it, and he held me close as I cried.
I have a close personal friend who experienced this, and while I developed feelings for her, I've agreed to stay platonic to be the friend she needs right now outside of romance. I try to get her to talk about it with me sometimes, but it's very hard for her, and we can't talk long. Part of that is because I'm a guy, and she doesn't trust guys, but part of that is the cptsd of bringing up her trauma again. Last time we talked about therapy, she said she couldn't keep affording it, apparently even with her insurance. I've offered many times to listen to her, and sometimes she does share, but she doesn't want to let herself trust me with everything and she doesn't have many others at all willing to help her. She's in a very difficult space financially and emotionally, and I often feel powerless to help her. I feel selfish for liking her because of my own emotional needs. I wish I could fix everything for her, but I can't even if I could. She's trying to do it all alone, and it breaks my heart.
Stop trying to make her talk about it dude. Please.
@nataliaalfonso2662 I'm just trying to support her as best as I can. If it were me, I'd need to talk it out, so I guess that's why I go that route. She does talk about it sometimes, which I think may help, but mostly it bothers her too much, or she doesn't trust me enough to say what's really bothering her.
@@joshclark44 Keep doing what you're doing...patiently. She needs you to be her friend. She may never want more, but if she does, respond to her cues. Don't ever push her into more or you will lose her.
Not everyone needs to talk tho, if she wants to, let her talk.
Theres also a huge difference between talking to a professional and a friend. It can help to do it with either one but some prefer a therapist cause its more neutral/clinical. And she might wanna keep some things inbetween her and a professional.
Dont push her too hard or she might distance herself from you.
It can take a long time to deal with these things.
As long as you dont expect her to tell u everything theres nothing wrong with trying to help.
Put her wishes first when trying tho.
@victoryamartin9773 she's already told me she doesn't want anything more. It's hard to accept because while she avoids relationships, I subconsciously am desperate for one. But I have eventually come to the conclusion that she needs a friend more than a lover atm and if I really loved her I'd do what she needs me to be even if it's not what I want for her. I'm trying to move on, because I do appreciate her as a friend. It's just hard sometimes because she's one of the few girls I really thought I had something with and I just read it wrong yet again...
i havent experienced s/a, but one of my closest friends has, so i feel compelled to watch this with all my focus
your such a good friend ❤
I'd love to have a friend like you you're so amazing
You sound well intentioned, but as an SA survivor, I would avoid you based on your screen name. That is how much SA can mess with a victim's mind.
It’s been almost 5 years and sometimes I still grief, and have flashbacks. It’s so hard not to feel guilt because I feel like none of this would’ve happened if I didn’t get with him. It doesn’t help at all when he would keep showing up at my job I had at the time as well. I just pray that he doesn’t find out where I start my new job at.
@@itsnotabby101 You trusted a man who betrayed you. There's no guilt in that. Only a loss of innocence. A lesson to learn from.
I don't know the full details of your story but there's one thing I do know: it wasn't your fault.
In my experience, I feel guilt because at the time I said yes, but I only did because I knew he'd get upset and threatening if I didn't. It was still manipulation and abuse.
You're not alone. Your experience and your emotions are valid. You're NOT guilty in any way for what happened to you. You didn't deserve that.
Didn’t realize how much this video would hit so hard to hear until I started crying near the end. I really appreciate the soft tone in which you speak about this topic specifically and tell us we are not to blame and didn’t deserve it. Think that’s what hit me hardest
Thank you for covering this. You never think it will happen to you when it does. The betrayal hits hard. You don’t always react like you imagine you would. No one is prepared for it.
Almost four years later I have finally started to heal. Take the time you need to recoup. ❤ Much love to fellow survivors. ❤
I've disassociated a lot in my childhood, so I've had lots of amnesia as a result... I don't remember anything extremely explicit, but I remember this nervousness that ran so deep. I don't consider myself a survivor because I don't even remember, and I don't want to dismiss people who have gone through it. I'm sure it's difficult for people to go through it and speak about it. Especially coming out of the shell of denial and saying 'that was wrong'!
thank you, it’s so hard getting flashbacks from the past and thinking about what i could’ve did if i never let him do it, im hyper sexual and i can’t stop thinking about the past so vividly and it hurts.
Wish I'd had this info 20, 30, 40 yrs ago.
Thanks for putting this out now, tho, for the myriad of victims out there.
Thanks!
I had the hypersexual side effect, and because of it people said I couldn't possibly be a victim... Okay...so why is it when I leave my house I have debilitating panic attacks? Why when my phone rings I start sobbing? And so much more... I hate it. I never asked for this.
I think this is one of the worse ways you could possibly get from such a situation and I hope your doing better,I would recommend you take one step at a time it will be a long journey and it will be hard because trauma isn't a joke but you can do it
Oh man! Felt so overwhelming the moment I saw the thumbnail... I'm currently in my late teens. It happened may be a decade ago. For the first time, it was a street vendor and for the second time it was a teenage guy and a neighbor for thr third time... God!! It's been a lot of time but the things and thoughts keep coming back. A lot of shit at home keeps happening and in the end I get blamed, my own parents say that the fault is in me... Had a miserably bad relationship for 2 years. This lead me towards severe depression and several anxiety disorders. It's been a year I've been diagnosed. And my parents say why don't u just be okay it's been a lot of time since ur medication and all... Huh... Man!! How!!
This is a lot of trauma to process. I've forgotten how it feels to be normal. Just hope it gets better someday and i feel *normal* atleast.
:)
Sad that the one video that should have hundreds of thousands of views has 53. Thank you for making this video though!
My notification of this video just popped up at 9:35am July 12th, 2024 so maybe after today it’ll grow in numbers
@@angelajensen5442it definitely will🩵
It was unlisted bro 💀
We have a feeling that it may be flagged due to topic sensitivity topic.
@@Psych2goStupid TH-cam and stupid censorship rules. There should be laws in place to prevent the censorship of such vital information that shouldn’t even be taboo and most definitely not silenced. Makes me so angry.
Then at the same time TH-cam will happily promote to everyone, these so called “Mukbangers”, that are slowly eating their life away. They show that to everyone , including young people!!
I would be boycotting TH-cam if it weren’t for the great educational content that’s so accessible… For example on this channel.
(Excuse the angry rant.. Sorry, not sorry xP )
I’ve been coming to terms with the fact that I was a victim of SA years ago and it’s been absolutely devastating and jarring to relive the memories, the triggers, and certain things like smells that would literally make me sick. There were so many enablers of my abuser that have told me to stay quiet to “not cause a scandal” or “if you come forward everyone’s going to know it’s you”. I’ve decided that I’m going to come forward now even though I’ve experienced healing and forgiveness. There still needs to be Justice and protection so no more potential victims are made or harmed.
As a 15yr transgender male, I've always broke down whenever SA is talked about, I'm super happy that it's getting awareness it needs. I have very bad memory and have always struggled with hypersexuality since I was 8, the only time I do remember being SA'd was back in 7th grade. I struggled with a guy 2 grades above me, who I thought was my friend, but he would constantly touch me and boss me arould. The last day I ever saw him was when he cupped my chest on the school bus and it was his stop, luckily a girl I knew helped me and reported him to the school. If it wasnt for her I would’ve stayed silent. I still struggle with it to this day and try to remind myself that even if it was something as small as what he was doing, my feelings and experiences are still valid. I hope to anyone out there struggling, that they get the help they need and can finally heal.
Lol
@@Ash-x9mhow is that funny they literally got sa’ed
@@Ash-x9m Exactly what was said above, trolling is one thing (and usually shitty on its own) but doing it here is absolutely vile. Reassess your character, do better.
To the commenter, that is so scary and I'm so sorry you went through it. People can underestimate and/or dismiss the impact of SA events like this cause maybe they're "brief" or a "one-time thing" and it's complete bull. This shit stays with you for life, and I hope you're doing alright and healing at your own pace.
I kept this video saved, and i couldnt figure out why. Untiltaday when someone I spoke to asked for advice on how to deal with $/A and the thoughts if inadequacy and everything else. I didnt know how to help but i sent this video, i hope they feel better soon, im always here for them no matter what❤
This helps a bit, I am 31 and out of those 31 years only 8 years have been assault-free, 3 of those years was until i was 3 the last 5 years free are recent, I am still struggling and in a major depressive wave currently. My friends barely convinced me not to isolate myself, which is what i often do that will end up being gone for years at a time. I cannot go out and when i do it is barely or if i have someone with me, being alone causes me to panic in the store, which causes people's attention to be on me which is worse. Working is near impossible and calling or even talking at times is unbearable. Some people think that calling me a "professional survivor" helps me when it makes it worse, that is not what i want to be known for, i don't want to be know as the person who was damaged constantly through ages 3-26. I want to be me and its hard to break out of that shell of just being seen as a victim.
I honestly cried... i wished i heard this years ago, its a really grounding video...
I can't believe how many people struggle with SA no matter how old they were in these dark days. Please guys, remember you're not alone and this wasn't your fault! There are so many people who love you, you changed someone's life! You matter and nothing is over for you. People: you're created to fight because you're strong. Keep going because one day your future self will smile remembering how much you have been through and you're still here giving a reason for someone ( maybe yourself too) to live!
Having experienced this and healing my inner child, I pray that anyone suffering in silence awaken to the fact that it's not their fault, heal through the love of God and have a beautiful life🙏 Amen
Honestly, I love how psych2go goes in depth with each lasting effect and what it does to a person. Especially the symptoms and how sexual violence can be by literally *anyone.*
Im 15 and a survivor of SA at the ages of 5 and 8, I highly appreciate this video because it helps me understand my problems more and now I can work on to fix them:D
Its really sad to know how many people experience this. This disgusting thing shouldn't be this common!! And most of the time the abuser dosent get any punishment. 2 people SA'ed me at 2 different ages and none of them got in ANY trouble. My close relative whom I told about this is still close friends with one of the abusers. Its not fair.
Bro our stories are nearly identical, except I was younger, and my abuser was my brother, and he had a history of doing the same thing to my older sisters(at the time it was only known about my oldest sister) and knowing it could have been prevented makes my blood boil, especially since he's in jail(for drugs) and my mother who knows what he did still sends him sooo much money, while we're barley holding up
@@beary4999 thats just disgusting! How can they just not get punishment for it. He didnt even go to jail for his acts. How unfair
I'm sharing my story:
I was SA when i was three years old and the person who SA'd me was the one person i trusted the most a family member of mine and it was life changing for me opening up was difficult for me since no one understood or blamed me for the event but i forgave my abuser even though it affected me tremendously I'm ready to move on. Remember you're not alone and your trauma is valid
Had to figure out how to deal with it on my own. I’ve come a long way, but it’s never been easy
I was sexually assaulted in kindergarten by a classmate when I was 5 years old. I've always just pushed it aside and tried to forget. I am so grateful for you covering this topic and validating our pain. Thank you. ❤
the affirmations you said almost made me start sobbing, thank you, this video makes me feel a lot better about what happened and makes me feel a lot less alone, i don’t have a lot of people i trust with what happened, seeing this come up in my recommended was unexpected cause i don’t watch these kinds of videos but I’m so happy it did, thank you for making this video
I deeply appreciate the awareness this video brings. As an SA survivor myself, it is comforting to see videos openly speaking about it and comment sections talking about shared experiences. Too many people deny the horrors of SA and trauma it brings, so im glad that this exists as a safe space for people to open up about this.
this video was really comforting to me. i’ve been dealing with sexual trauma for abt a year and a half now. it’s nice to remind myself that it wasn’t my fault even tho i can go down a rabbit hole of shame and guilt. ofc i feel sorry for myself but deep down inside me i feel sorry for the other person, i feel like i did something to them for this to happen, making myself believe i deserved it bc i of what i may or may not of done to them. sexual trauma is hard for everyone. no matter your sex everyone struggles. i’ve tried to heal from what happened but already being a pretty anxious person, the sexual trauma doesn’t help. i hope no one has to go thru anything like this and mourn the people who do. i’m here for anyone who has gone thru it, i love you ❤️
I'm a survivor of SA in childhood. Thank you for touching on this.
I'm a child SA survivor. It happened when I was 5 by a family member, an older cousin. I'm 23 now. And for the longest time, I've had such a warped perspective of myself. My mind over sexualizes everything in the most inappropriate times. I get these horrible intrusive thoughts that I hate myself for. I really do feel like that experience burned something horrible into my psyche. I don't feel like a normal person with the thoughts I have and I wonder sometimes if I'm the only one scarred this way. I know I'm most likely not, but it just feels so lonely dealing with my thoughts and feelings.
Hearing that it's not my fault brought me to tears. Yeah, I've heard that before and I logically know that. But sometimes (Like right now) when I get stuck in the hypersexuality, I just fall down into a pit with it. I guess I really needed that reminder, so thank you for that. And thanks to the TH-cam algorithm for randomly suggesting this video.The worst part is that I enjoy cuddling with my partners, so long as I'm awake. But if I'm asleep and I wake up to feel anything touching against my back or butt, I am just instantly transported back. Even 20 years later.
My Girlfriend shared this channel with me a few days ago. She showed me a video that related to my own trauma growing up.
She suffers from sexual trauma. She hurts so much and I don't really know how to help her. I'm here for her and I'm going to see if she will watch this video with me tonight. I want to always be here for her.
That is a TRUE boyfriend right there😔✊🏼✊🏼✊🏼
@@Jujuonthatbeat777 I'm a girl, too :)
@@searchwoman529 oh…. sorry it tends to to assume things😭😭😭
@@searchwoman529🏳️🌈❤️🔥🧡🤍💗❤️
My heart goes out to all of SA and my prayers go out to you all in hopes of healing 🙏
Bless You Amanda for everything you do, and everything that you are 🙏💪🤟🌹🤟💪🙏
I was 8. Maybe 9.
It was my dad. I knew what was happening, but I didn’t try to stop it at the time. I didn’t want him to be mad, and I didn’t want to get in trouble. I’ve never told anyone, ever. I’ve never spoken about it.
Me too.
I was SA as a child by an older cousin. It’s affected me my entire life and I ended up on a lot of drugs to numb the pain of it. I am finally clean about a month so far and on medication and therapy for depression and anxiety. The thing that affected me most and most upsets me is that I’ve struggled with relationships because of it. As a teenager I used to tell myself I was not good enough to date and now even as a man I struggle a lot
I’m a survivor of sexual abuse. He was my cousin and I was 4 years old and he was 18. It happened 6 times. 4-7 years old. I’ve been diagnosed c-ptsd, depression, and anxiety . And I usually refuse to talk about my experiences. I can’t let anyone get too close to me. Thank you for making this video. I mainly relate to the dissociation part.
I saw this and let out a long sigh as one of my friends are currently going through that but I’m in England/ the uk and they’re all the way in America so I have to just listen and can’t do anything about it so I’ve promised them that as soon as I’m able to I’ll go and find them. And I plan to keep it that way. I’ll try and try again. I don’t care if I have to go through things I’m terrified of (flying,socialising and facing my depression) just to find and help them. I genuinely threw up when they told me because I was so worried and disgusted to the point I’ve been throwing up almost every day. I’ve been watching this channel a lot recently. I’m gonna send this video to them today.
Yesterday, a longtime friend of mine confided in me about an assault she recently experienced a few days ago and as a survivor, had to set the boundary of taking a brief step back from the conversation to keep myself grounded and set a time for us to revisit the topic since we both became triggered.
I’ve been in recovery for a year almost two and am grateful to have been met with support at the time of coming out, but sometimes I have random flashbacks and attacks that feel excruciating.
Thank you for this. I'm currently getting therapy for my depression and anxiety. I think a lot of what I feel is because of the sexual abuse I've suffered throughout my life. Each time was by someone I knew or loved. It's been hard to accept, and I've been going through the stages of grief even though it's been years. Therapy is good, and I think it's necessary no matter how long since the trauma occurred. Don't push it to the past or try to diminish what's happened to you. It will come back in some way. Work through it with a professional. We deserve peace.
It was my husband (now ex husband) and the trial is in January. It's been a year (the awful anniversary was yesterday) and I'm still not anywhere near okay and cycle through panic, grief, and numbness. If it wasn't for my fantastic therapist and the love of my babies I wouldn't even still be here. Sometimes I'll be doing something and have an emotional flashback for seemingly no reason and it's like all the air gets sucked out of my lungs, my throat collapses in with panic, my stomach sinks like being at the top of a steep rollercoaster, tears fill my eyes, and my skin prickles with hot painful goosebumps. It's like my body gets set on fire, but my blood runs ice cold. It's a grief and pain I can't really explain and it knocks the life out of me for hours or days at a time. I've begun disassociating for anywhere from a few minutes to 2-3 days. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone...not even him. I don't feel safe in my own body, not even when I'm alone. It's exhausting and painful to not feel safe or at home in your own skin...like it has red hot brands burning your darkest secrets and humiliations across your body for everyone to see. Nowhere is safe or secure or comforting when your body is an iron maiden prison.
I wasn’t expecting to cry to this video. I would like to thank you for talking about this. You make me feel much better about myself.
It is crazy when you said that if you have difficulties to trust other to take your time and do it at your own pace I just started sobbing and I realised that I expected you to say something like “Work on yourself and if you struggle, work harder!” Being greeted with your empathy and kindness made me realise again how hard I can be with myself…
Thank you so much for this video ♥️♥️♥️ especially for mentioning and explaining hyper sexuality. People often think that survivors are no longer or less interested in sex but often we tend to treat our body and mental health like it was treated by the predator, like it isn’t worth something to keep safe and sound…
ughh,, the flashbacks are the absolute worst--feeling that trauma over and over again along with the panic attacks associated are so hard to deal with most of the time, so hard even to the point where sometimes it's hard to even get out of your bed and do things that you were supposed to/wanted to do that particular day because of either depressive or anxious thoughts consuming your mind.
it's nice to feel heard and seen. the statement above is what i have to go through...what makes it worse is the fact that sometimes there isn't even anything that triggers it. for example, i'll be watching a funny cat video and then BAM, next thing I know, I'm curled up and crying to myself because of what happened.
to all of the SA survivors (including myself); You all are so strong, and I'm so proud of you for staying alive despite what you went through💙