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This is an important video! Grooming can also happen to adults, the way it happens is a bit different, but it’s important to remember it’s not exclusive to minors
This is a real serious sh*t for everybody to watch. It seems that not many people are preparing their young kids and teens to be fully aware of the shady world we live in.
It baffles me how schools don't have "keeping yourself safe" lessons. It should be a mandatory requirement like once a week Edit: "keeping yourself safe" is the objective of the lessons, it obviously isn't/wouldn't be called that 🙄
Keeping yourself safe the amount of sexual abuse on your street should not surprise you people always make excuses.... why do you think everyone keeps talking about Epstien, Ellen and P Diddy it's rife In America and Britain just like racism!
@@pleasebekind7056 They don't care if a drag queen can walk in your school when it clearly the drag queen normalising their behaviour if that's really important do you think the school cares if a stranger or family member molested or raped teachers and head teachers don't care!
Then how does Bullies grow in a school Eco System.. Bullys are essential for weaker kids to grow..believe me I was bullied in Middle School and High School.. it made me feel weak. So I went to learn self defense after in community College even then I did get mugged in college too out of 40$ on knife point...it's a scary world we live in...
When I was in middle school I met a friend's sister at my friend's birthday party. I was standoffish because of abuse that was happening at home? but her sister said I was "Cool" and started meeting me every single day at the bus stop. In the beginning we talked about TV-shows - but after a while she started by asking questions about my body and its maturity, then moved onto kissing and touching. My parents ignored it as "Friends" or "Friends sister", but this woman said she loved me and wanted to protect me from the family situation I was in. She joined the military and started buying me gaming consoles, clothes, games, weapons etc. It was a huge topic for years not to tell anyone, because she could get arrested. She would choke me, cut me with knives, and used to have me wear a collar for her? but she would also play it off as something normal (My parents thought it was a stylistic choice). Eventually she convinced me to move into her barracks with her. She would tell her coworkers I was family, or that I was her friend - then she would hook up with them behind the scenes while actively telling me she was dating me. Years later, I had people tell me they would get messages from her saying to leave me alone, or that she would hover when other people tried to get near me? I remember once at a BBQ party, one of her superiors was put off by the age gap and tried to ask if I was ok? but I was heavily manipulated into thinking things were normal, and that I was in love. I remember everyone else at the BBQ played it off as "He's a boy who likes older girls/he's lucky", but this guy went out of his way to track me down when I wandered away from the group to ask more questions and I respect him for that now even if he never did anything to get me away from that situation (He still recognized it was wrong). TLDR: A person being groomed isn't going to tell you "Hey I'm in danger", they might say "This is my friend" or "This is my partner" they might know not everything is normal, but see it as "A form of love specific to the person who cares for me". The kid might be going through other forms of abuse in their life? or be a survivor of extreme circumstances and see their situation as the better option. Don't take things at face value, even if a kid gets mad about you trying to help them they will be grateful years later.
that is horrific, and what she did is so disgusting and so disgraceful to the military. but most importantly, it was disgraceful to you. i hope you're healing and having a better life now ☹️
Thats severely fucked. What is it with mfs in power and "trustworthy" positions being creeps? Ive been s/aed nd groomed by MULTIPLE (yes, MULTIPLE) fucking cops in my lifetime
happened to me when i had discord in secret without my parents. Guy eventually went offline one day after saying he was gonna commit suicide but i still think it's fake. The last known username of him was b1gb1rd.
I was a target but thankfully not a victim. My intuition has always been one of my strongest traits, so I pulled away whenever things felt off, thankfully. Less than a year later, the guy was found to be texting multiple teenage girls and lost his job. I haven’t told anyone not out of shame, but just because I’ve already processed it so it doesn’t really feel relevant. And because my parents wouldn’t leave pieces big enough to find.
While this video is mainly directed at children who are especially vulnerable to grooming, adults can be manipulated and groomed too. I’ve had people try to groom me despite being in my 20s, trying to exploit my autism and how desperate I am for a stable relationship with someone I like.
I'm so sorry man! That sounds so incredibly awful! I hope you can find someone in your life that loves you for who you are, because you deserve that. I wish you nothing but the best for the future. Sincerely: An Internet Stranger.
True I'm also scared and worried after I've struggle lonely issues, yet I'm still scared (at my own same age of 20, I'm just not ready to use the word 'trust other's' specifically)
I disagree since adults typically have more control of what happens to them compared to minors. Because it kills me how I’ve seen this word be misused as a means of dodging accountability over any bad decisions made. At the end of the day, there will always be terrible people in the world while it’s up to you through proper discernment to know who they are. Therefore, I don’t say this to invalidate your experience or anything, but looking at this from a different angle.
When I was younger, I got groomed online and I didn’t know at all. They weren’t even an adult but they made it so obvious that they were grooming me and that same person is still roaming to this day. I’m still recovering and when I tried to expose them for what they did no one listened :(
@@SarahtheAutisticCartoongeek this dude from the splatoon fandom who (I believe) changed his name to “Sleepy Squid” to get away but he was known as Sleepybean when he did it
@@Im_Just_A_Silly_Goober Not really weird. "All slaves should be free" "All slaves should be free" Or read OP out of context simultaneously with two different perspectives, it's similar to logic of reading one sentence with different meanings. The two different perspectives refers to: Perspective 1: Read OP normally just like the vid's context Perspective 2: Read OP out of context, this implies OP's every statements/claims are what most adults do-which will resulted reading one sentence with different meanings, hence making a joke. Edit: O_O Lots of people don't get my joke.
Can confirm - first met my groomer at 13, then reunited at 16 - and he haunted me until I was 21 when we cut ties. Grooming can happen to literally anyone.
Yeah it happens especially to adults who are vulnerable (for example due to mental disability) or when theres a strong power dynamic (like college teacher and their student). But kids are targeted more because theyre easier targets than most adults. We can definitely still acknowledge that there are adult victims
Unfortunately, I fell victim to it when I was a child. A few years have now passed and I've hardly spoken to anyone about it and every time someone says to me, "You're so grown up for your age," I feel sick and feel sick cold down my spine and it has done a lot of damage to me mentally and physically which is why I struggle with it every single day. In any case, what I want to say is to the adults, watch your children and what they do on their cell phones, iPads etc. and to the people who have the desire to do something like that, please get professional help. It's a crime to do that to someone and not cool.
Im so sorry you went through that as well. It is never too late to speak up or out, even if just to loved ones or a therapist. Part of leaving their control can be recovery and growth and not feeling guilty or ashamed because it was never your fault.
As a kid, I got groomed and thankful nothing happened but my god as an adult now I realise what happened it's quite scary. These types of warning sign videos are important to share. It could help someone.
Me too! Several times. I just recently unlocked a memory when I was 12/13 my mom wanting me to date my stepdads "young" coworker. My aunt and I were talking about it. She said my mom said "who cares how old he is if he buys her things" wtf. Thank goodness that young man was not comfortable with it. I remember just feeling confused but just standing there. I have zero contact with my mother. She hasn't even met my 2nd baby. Only met my first once.
@@jenivettebigham7060I'm so sorry this happened to you, it weird how a memory can be triggered by something like a video. This is why these types of videos are so important and people should share experiences to make others aware so history doesn't repeat itself.
Same, luckily nothing happened because the caught it this year and he got investigated. He was a teacher at middle school and this year my mom found a text on my phone and reported it to the police. There were so many sighns from 11-14, I just turned 15 and the investigation ended like 3 months ago so it’s still on my mind a lot.
I'm a minor who had terrible past, watching this vid It triggered me so much that I remember my unwanted memories with my groomer when I was around 5-10 yrs until it happened again with another groomer who was my own father when I got 12-14, glad I told my mom the truth about his behavior or it would gotten worse if hadn't to, and they got divorced+ filed an case against that man...
I hope it can help them come out to get help if they are in the situation. It's not to shame anyone's in the experience but rather recognizing the situation and get the appropriate help
As someone that has been groomed before, I wish I had this knowledge back then. Now the damage has been done and all I can do is try to prevent it from happening to others. It does so much more damage than anyone may realize without having gone through it themselves. No amount of counseling or medication can undo it. Its up to the victim to be strong. If you too have been groomed or touched inappropriately and are reading this, then the fact you are reading this proves you are strong because you are still here as I am. You are not alone, so don't hesitate to speak out about what's going on, whether it be that you feel you are being groomed or already have been and are just trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered childhood. I know how you feel and even if those you go to may not know how it feels, they will understand you need help. Enjoy your childhood and innocents please. I never had the chance to
Hey my friend is getting groomed by our teacher, he even has a wife but she says that it's fine with her but I slowly see her being obsessed with him. And he still hadn't even give a name to their relationship like he had sexual relationship with her but hadn't ever asked he to be his girlfriend or anything what should I do?
@@user-xe3uw8tf3m there's hotlines you can call and child protective services (they don't just deal with abuse within the family) I just googled pedophile hotlines and results came up
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that. You never deserved any of that, no one deserves that, and I'm proud of you for staying strong and are still living 🫂
@@leonkuwata6954"trusted person" that's going to take longer than blackbelthitoshis' interpretation on the word "In a moment" you might say "ooh get a therapist" but the problem is that for one, I am not going to spend my time complaining about all my problems to a person who doesn't even know who I am and probably doesn't care either, as a matter of a fact, all it would do is feed it's ego. And second of all I don't really, play among us anymore because it's just bots.
@@-originalLemon- 1) venting isn't complaining. It's different. People who vent seek support and solutions from others. People who complain don't. 2) very mature of you to make a joke, under a video about grooming. 3) your opinion IS valid. I won't tell you what to do. But the way you said "Maybe don't vent anymore" sounds like you're blaming the victim.
@@lylyssy the thing is, it kept happening back to back to a point where I just dissociated. I can't feel anything anymore. No emotions, no hatred, no love, nothing I often fake my emotion to fit in but deep down inside I feel nothing for nobody. Not myself or anyone I love or care about. So it's not really much coping, it's that I don't care about anything anymore
What's really sad is this happened at the golden age of Hollywood and child actors and actresses especially the 1930s-2000s. Their autobiography and documentary about this saids it all.
Thank you so much. I have a friend who is under 15 and talks to people over the age of 20 explicitly. I've been doing my best to get them to block these people and not talk to them. It's a bit of a fight because they're so desperate for attention and they're hypersexual. Being over 18 myself, I refuse to address that with a 100 foot pole- but I just try to be there and check in with them and filter who they let into their life so they don't get hurt. They don't believe they're being groomed even though I've given them some signs and thinks its their fault for it and I want them to know it's not their fault and for them to get help for this. It's not easy and I'm sure a lot of kids are targets of grooming (I was at some point, but my parents forced me to give up my phone for a long time and I was scared of getting in trouble, so I didn't do it again-) Thanks again. I'm gonna send them this video and I really hope this helps..
It's so true. I always think of this quote from Supernatural "demons I get, people are crazy." It's sad to think that people are the real monsters in this world.
i was groomed throighout the ages 7-12 and it was so bad that i literally thought i loved them. theyre really manipulative.. :(( tysm for spreading awareness
sending lots of hugs and energy to you kae, i went through similar situation..except with family members, i do hope you able to be safe now and heal from it slowly
I'm so sorry you had to go through such a traumatic experience. It's heartbreaking how manipulative people can be, especially when targeting vulnerable young individuals. :(
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.porassss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
I hate the world. I hate that this is a thing that even can happen. I was accused of even a *hint* of grooming activity while I was volunteering at a church. And once I realized that was what they were concerned about, I felt so betrayed and upset. ...then later in life, the Smash Bros shit happened, and a few years after that, I found out one of my cousins *was* being groomed by a priest in his community. I hate it all. I hate this world.
Just to make sure to cut off anyone wondering, even though my comments don't normally get answered; I used to volunteer at a church. Didn't even match my faith, but it was the first place I stumbled into after a panic attack, and they welcomed me into their College Age program, and then as a mentor for the Youth. I used to help set up drinks, then started bringing my WiiU and letting the kids do 8 player Smash before the service started, and I'd help the pastors and stuff. One girl, who mighta been a freshmen at her oldest, expressed upset at going on a field trip without being with her friends, some grouping related thing. I told her it'd be good for her to make new friends and give it a shot; new experiences and all that. When she was still upset, I gave her my phone number and said to text me if she ever wanted to vent or give someone an ear, and I'd see it and try to reply even though I work/do school as well. I then warned her group leader about her seeming upset about being lonely, and then I got talked *at* by like 4 different other adults that what I did was questionable at best, and potentially grooming. Ignoring none of these signs at all being on the table, or how open I was about just trying to do the right thing, I couldn't have been any more hurt once the pieces got into place. As if I would prey on someone young enough to be my baby sister, particularly when I already had folks in my age bracket that I was trying to date. ..... and then in later years, I'd learn just how serious the community need be to keep any sort of adult-kid reaction to an absolute minimum, and how frailly small that line is. Let alone my Aunt telling us that my special-needs nephew had been getting inappropriate messages sent to him by his own minister, and being told to keep quiet about it by the bastard. As hurt as I felt that the possibility of me doing such a horrifyingly wrong thing could EVER come up in anyone's mind, the realization that there are folk who DO commit such atrocities felt even worse. I hate this world.
Your right bad people live in this world, you shouldn’t hate the world, hate the crocked individuals. But just as I have free will to like this world, you too have the free will to hate this world too. We are all beings which have dark and light with in ourselves the true test in life is which side you choose follow and no path is easy. Never let others dictate how you should live your life, being friends with a child isn’t wrong, being supportive isn’t wrong either. People who manipulate good traits are evil. Ditch that church or become spiritual, there are good people amongst the dark world.
The church is a really common grooming spot, given how much leaders and authority figures are glorified there. People also bring their children there frequently, and unfortunately wherever kids are is usually where the creeps will be too. That being said though, monsters lurk everywhere, it’s impossible to escape them. It’s sad but true.
All these signs happened with the “abducted in plain sight” girl. The neighbor who took her groomed her for years. He’d send her flowers after a play. He’d told her parents it was okay for him to spend time alone with her. He convinced them to let him sleep in her bed for “therapy” because he claimed he was told he had a problem liking young girls so he needed to sleep there to learn not to do anything to them. He got everyone in that family to trust him and then kidnapped her basically with the parents permission. She was supposed to go horseback riding with him, but they never came back and he tied her up in a trailer and convinced her aliens had kidnapped them both and she had to marry and have kids with him to help save their planet. Real messed up stuff. He even had an affair with the mom because he had convinced her to trust him and that her husband didn’t love him like he did. The girl was only a kid and teen at this time so she didn’t know better, and the parents were very naive because back then we didn’t know this stuff because there was no internet we easily could access info. This day and age I hope they wouldn’t known better, but back then this was a member of their church and they thought they could trust him.
I didn't know about this movie before, but I looked it up after reading your comment and apparently, it's a documentary based on something true? I was shocked and somewhat appalled. Just how can someone be so deviously manipulative?
@@arpanarastogi8756 yes it is definitely a true story. He really was super manipulative to the whole family so he could get everyone to trust him so he could get away with his sick desires.
I'm so sorry but the parents were super dumb like he literally told them he liked children but they still let their daughter spend time with him is crazy💀💀💀
Thank you for making a video covering this topic, especially now when poor, younger individuals are becoming more and more victimised to grooming. I have friends who weren’t as lucky to avoid such awful things happening to them from overpowering adults in their childhoods, so hopefully this will help the children of today stay safe. Take care out there, youngens. ❤
I may have heard too many stories about these types of things, and I especially hesitant to trust adults I haven’t trusted before, particularly men for some reason, but at least I know all the warnings and red flags. Thank you for making this video so more people can be educated
I’m happy this video is here. As someone who was groomed, it truly is hard to tell if you’re being groomed without being taught what grooming is. I hope this video helps save many lives from this type of trauma. It truly is a difficult thing to go through and recover from.
You're welcome. It's deeply concerning how prevalent these issues are. If you ever need to talk or have questions about staying safe online, feel free to reach out. We might make more videos about it
I've noticed 7/7 of these signs in my father, I'm glad this video was shared, he has been overstepping my boundaries so much, and insists on keeping our interactions private. I hate to think this, but I'm realizing it's not normal. He constantly makes me uncomfortable and after my mother divorced him, it has gotten so much worse. Again, thank you for making this video, and I understand this is not something to throw around lightly.
I'm so glad that you noticed these signs. As best as you can, try to avoid him and stay with your mother if possible. Make her aware of the actions he has been doing. Remember, he is wrong and don't feel embarrassed about it because you are the victim. I really hope that it stops because people like that are truly disgusting. I hope you can heal from the damage he's already caused.
Im so sorry this is happening. Please tell trusted adults about this, your mother or other family, a teacher or school counsellor. If possible, write down what happens, or record and take screenshots of things that make you uncomfortable. You deserve to be safe and protected and i hope adults intervene to keep you safe. It is not your fault
As a person who got groomed online more than once, I'm glad people put awareness to this...This is a serious issue that people sadly overlooked and blame the victims for this, heck, this subject is mocked at! Thank you so much for this video, and I hope people who are experiencing the same thing are doing well. Remember, none of this is your fault, you're a minor. Innocent and pure❤. The one who should be ashamed is the groomer herself/himself!
Let's not forget that while applicable, between an adult and minor. These same manipulative tactics can be used in age gap relationships, where one party is significantly younger. Just because they're 18 doesn't mean they can't be a victim.
Thank you for pointing this out, I don't think enough attention is given to this issue when it's two adults. I was in an age gap relationship like this for 7 years.
This is very true. I was in my very early 20s and met a man in his late 40s. We ended up "dating" but I have always had a terrible, sinking feeling when I look back on that time. Even though I was an adult, I was in an extremely vulnerable space and that man took advantage of it. It makes me mad and sad all in one.
@@ashleyrandall2160 thank you. After seeing your comment it got me thinking and realized that I too was groomed by 40 year old "friend" and former coworker while I was in my 20's. Looking back I remember all the times he bought and did things for me. He even went out of his way to take to meet my favorite celebrity, but obviously now it was so I can gain his trust. I had hit rock bottom that year. I was abused by my mom(back when I still lived with her) and mistreated at work to the point I fell down the rabbit hole of depression. I self harmed and it was visible. This is how he scoped me out because victims of abuse are easier to manipulate. It was when he started to get physical that I broke off the friendship. He used the "you threw me out like garbage" as a guilt tactic, but I was at least able to be strong enough to ignore that. I now know he was never a friend and he used me. Thank God I was never raped, but had I stayed with him longer it could have happened. Terrible people out there.
Yes and I hate how so many people romanticize it in books, mangas, doujins, yaoi, fan fictions, etc. It's not cute. While there are age gap relationships that are legit, they aren't common. The other age gap "relationships" are just grooming
I have a friend who says he groomed someone. That’s because the other person said he did. My friend believed it to be true because it was his best friend who said such a thing. He sent me an unbelievable amount of screenshots, and I don’t believe he groomed the other person. This friend has never lied to me, that’s why I questioned him. Watching this video, I noticed: my friend did not do a single one of these. Him and his friend didn’t even talk all day, at most maybe 5 minutes at a time, 4-5 times a day (it was over discord, and she never wanted to call him). The only time they had hour long talks was when she was mad at him. He always told her to tell him if he did anything wrong, and she always said no. Even if it was something small, he’d apologize. Years into their friendship, she said he groomed her, and he just accepted it. Again, this guy’s never lied to me. Rereading everything he sent and spoke (we must have called for… maybe 4 hours just talking that one night), the only thing I noticed was he had a hard time picking up when she wanted to stop talking, so he’d keep going on about x subject. One day, she said it was so draining to be with him. It’s been… almost 2 years? He’s in alot better of a mindset, and has turned his life around, but I don’t believe he groomed her because he did ask for her approval for many things. I’m not trying to be vague, I just dont want this comment to be super absurdly long. I personally believe he was accused and just accepted it (until me and a couple of his other friends) told him he didn’t groom. The other person, I can only imagine her friends were on her side, but I was never friends with her to begin with, so I dont know her thoughts. On one hand, I am only getting one side of the story. On the other, again there was an absurd amount of screenshots, and I’m a slow reader, but it means I did see the talks they both had
I relate to this so much it makes me think you're talking about me when I'm reading this except I'm not he im a she, its hard bc u cant relly vent about being falsely accused for grooming bc of the hate from other ppl being suspicious of what you're saying, therefor i would like for no one to @ me on this pls.
I think I understand. I was accused of being verbally abusive for refusing to loan someone $20. I said no at normal tone, but she said I yelled at her because she interpreted as yelling. She then demanded I tell her why (she was bad to borrow money and and not pay it back and it was a tight week for me) and that I give her the $20 to compensate emotional damage. She didn't get the money.
People like this restore my faith in humanity :3 I have a girlfriend thtabis a lot younger than me and we are e-dating but I am not grooming her, we truly love eachother
HOW OLD WERE THEY? Just the fact of them talking and texting each other is a BIG red flag. Not to mention them not agreeing on what happened beween them.
What’s sad is I always knew I had been groomed as a teenager but it took til I was 30 for my brain to really accept it. It’s like I told myself what had happened but my brain wouldn’t listen. It’s sad what the body does to protect itself. You feel so special and loved, then you age out and get tossed aside. It really fucks with your head and the idea of love, they also have you convinced it was your idea to initiate these things. Btw I am in a much healthier place now as an adult and therapy helps. Videos like this are triggering as hell but it’s also comforting in a weird way. Thank you for making this and sharing the info
I think these types of lessons should be taught to kids, to keep them safe. Sometimes, ignorance isn't bliss. More children knowing these signs, knowing how to tell someone, and feeling safe doing so, is a perfect way to help kids avoid these types of things. This isn't talked about enough. Schools, parents, etc, treat it as a hush-hush topic. When doing so, you're making the kids not feel safe to talk about if something is going on. It breaks my heart knowing there's kids out here as I say this who think it's better to stay quiet because the environments they've been in have taught them that.
It should be noted that grooming can also be done for non-sexual purposes (grooming a child to be like a parent's therapist or 'friend'- a shoulder to lean on and put their adult burdens on- for example), and the manipulation used in grooming can match up with other types of abuse and manipulation (I.e. special attention, random gift giving both match up with signs of love bombing).
@@ashsa07 not in the traditional sense, but the idea of introducing adult topics to a child who isn't old enough to fully understand or navigate them consensually, there's an undeniable overlap. Even if it's not sexual, it's still inappropriate, right? Like if one parent is venting about their problems with your other parent, or talking about issues with their personal life and friends, or (for example) offering you alcohol because you're "so mature, you're the only friend I can talk to about this, so what's the harm in a drink between friends? Oh, but don't tell your teachers I did this. It's a secret between us, okay?" You can't deny that these are all the characteristics of grooming.
Seeing videos like these and knowing there’s a need for videos like these is absolutely heartbreaking. I was lucky as a child because for some reason I was veryyyyy aware of stranger danger and stayed the hell away from from older people especially men.
@@Psych2go TH-cam skipped giving a notification from you for some reason, pardon me. But thank you nonetheless! I find comfort in your videos, so please keep making them!
Dear lord, all of these match. I made many adult friends, and many took advantage of me. The trying to spend alone time, trying to talk about topics related to s** and telling me that he was only trying to educate me, trying to build trust with me, the excessive touching which he tried to justify saying "people do this in many cultures as a sign of affection", then trying to make me think I should keep my involvement with him secret, as his wife and my parents everyone will misunderstand, everyone is too " judgemental", the constant gift giving to make me feel indebted and make me let my guard down, even though I didn’t want to most of the time, and always telling me I should go to him whenever I have issues I need advice on, And most importantly When I noticed how excessive he was being as he harassed me, he was saying that he thought I was mature. Basically, trying to make me think that since I'm more mature compared to everyone my age, I should do things he wants to make me do. Everyone reading this, please stay safe. I only came to the chilling realization when he was actively trying to do s**** harassment, and even then I doubted and blamed myself for days. I am so traumatised I struggle to live normally as I used to. I'm completely shattered mentally. Everyone please be safe, and if you are a parent, be a trustable adult to your child. Otherwise they'll hide things from you and eventually end up in serious situations.
@@OtterSkull Thank you, and if you could, please read the comment now as I had to edit it since I couldn’t finish writing everything due to keyboard issues.
@@TR_wsr1 Thanks, I read your edit, just know that none of it was your fault and feel free to talk to someone that is close to you and that you trust. Please consider going to therapy, it will help. Stay safe and have a nice day!
Thank you for covering this. I’ve seen people throw this around simply because they weren’t happy in a relationship. Accusations of such matter are very serious and can ruin an individuals life whether they are innocent or not.
I think this topic should be talked about more to increase awareness. I have went through this early in my life and I'm glad that there is validation here. Keep up the great videos 💟
There’s one misrepresentation in this video. According to psychiatrist, including Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a lead expert on narcissism, and law enforcement, grooming can also be done to adults. This video is really important because it focuses on grooming on children as an issue but it should say that grooming could be done on anyone, but the focus today would be on what grooming looks like with children. The incomplete definition set up adults who are victims of grooming to be invalidated. That being said, it would also be cool if you guys could do a video on what it looks like for adult victims.
Before anyone replies, I just want to emphasize that this video is very important and should not be muddied with including adult grooming It just should make sure the definition at the beginning is complete so there isn’t a misunderstanding.
@@raheemahnitoto3099 adults cannot never be groomed because that's already consensual. only 18 yrs and below fits the definition of being groomed or minors.
@@juanpaologalua5869 thats not funny. it frequently happens. grooming is manipulation. you being an adult doesnt mean you wont feel pride or pressure when another adult love bombs you. it doesnt mean you wont break rules (typically laws) when another adult tells you to. it doesnt mean you wont be told to keep a toxic relationship a secret because an adult tells you to. it doesnt mean you wont have issues saying no when another adult pressures you. these things happen all the time. alot of adults have reported being pressured into activities by these groomers. whats crappy is, unlike with children, they cant do much anything about it in the ways of law.
@@juanpaologalua5869 this is a misunderstanding that I’m talking about. Adults can be coerced my grooming. It happens a lot in cults. If you look at the strict definition of grooming, it states that. I am quoting information from psychology and law enforcement. Not taking them into consideration, causes more harm.
Yea that term is getting more commonly known these days. It's also not too uncommon, that big content creators (especially those that make children related content) abuse their position and do this to their own fans, privately. I think around 3-5 (max) content creators I used to watch in my childhood, are p€dos, which can come to light even after many years, sometimes.
@@pearltem5826it’s true. Although it’s the same for me. Of course, I tried to make a “but actually” but everything sounded creepy, especially in the context of this video.
This video is so important and especially to bring awareness to those who are currently unaware and are struggling, my heart goes out to people are are currently struggling because this is such a hard thing to go through
coming from someone who was falsely accused of grooming, this hits hard to say the least, the person who did so gaslit me to the point where I accepted that I was a paedophile, when i wasnt, these are sensitive topics so I will not give my opinion. that is all.
I also had this kind of situation. Someone who was always saying different age forced me to write some things with them, saying like they are depressed but maybe writing something I'm scared of can help. Also saying that friends always say they love each other so I must say I love them and things like saying they are worried when I don't talk so I must talk even if they don't reply. And of course sending lots of adult drawings while knowing I'm scared of adult things and then also sending drawings of my fave characters. Soon people started saying that I'm bad that I'm evil and, well, you can guess what. I was told that person sent them the screenshots of something like me saying "I love you" but without their whole forcing me to say it. Or said that I asked them to draw scary things. I didn't know they really did that, I asked them and they kept saying people are just jealous, then suddenly blocked me and I was scared because I thought they may die as they always mentioned it, like saying they may, well, end their life if I won't do what they tell me to do. They always told me they are just a bit younger than me but always used the phrase "I'm a baby". Something like "I don't understand anything, I'm just a baby". When I got worried after they blocked me people just kept saying it's good for them that they blocked me. Few years later some people helped me realise that I was probably gaslit. But there were people who said they know that person was the abuser but still I'm bad for doing what they told me to do. Then this person suddenly messaged me again saying they may forgive me but I must write scary things with them. When I told them I must know they are adult before talking with them just for safety they blocked me again and lots of random people messaged me saying I'm a groomer, people started to block me, I got banned from few servers. Soon later I joined one server and just normally talked with many people, one person was saying they are a child but when I asked if I can help with homework they always refused and often started talking about things not suitable for children. When I was worried about it people just brushed it off and then suddenly I got banned. And again, lots of "groomer" messages. But this person kept saying that others are jealous of our friendship and things like "You can admire me in secret" that was creepy. And suddenly someone who said they are 17 started writing really adult things to me and almost demanding to reply in the same way. When I explained I'm scared they said that they were told to do it to get proofs that I'm a, well, you know. But when they realised that I'm scared and tried to instead explain people I'm not evil, they lost contact with people who send them. Of course, the person who send them was the "admire in secret" person. Later this sent person said they have 14th birthday. So, someone sent them to an adult, telling them to write adult things and lie about their age to pretend to be "legal" so an adult may take a bite and write something scary while they were like 13 and it was all to find "proofs" to frame someone to be worse than a murderer. It scares me to think someone really used a child to do it, either really thinking I'm evil and sending a child while thinking I may do something worse than death to them or knowing I would never do anything like it and making a huge plot using a child only to fabricate "proofs" to accuse me for the worst thing in the world. Even up until today I sometimes get messages like "Groomer", "I know what you did to X" (X being the first person mentioned) and now when I want to tell a friend I like them I always say "I like you in a safe, friendly way, without any bad intentions" to just make sure it won't be misunderstood or used against me. For many years I wanted to erase myself because I believed I may accidentally hurt someone without realising it. I don't think about adult things and I know I sometimes accidentally may joke about something normal and people may find a different meaning. Or I say something normal for me and people laugh and I just need someone to explain me that it can have a different meaning. So I'm always scared I may say something like "I like you, you are great" and someone may think I'm trying to court them. Once one older than me person was saying they are so bad, so ugly and so on and after I told they "You are great" I was accused for love bombing. I also always deeply look into anything I watch or read before recommending it to anyone because I'm scared that maybe, just maybe, there is even one nanoscond not good for kids and people would think I'm sending it with bad intentions. Even if the person is older than me. So in the end I'm scared of everyone, myself included, the whole world itself. I'm also feeling guilty when I talk about the historical person I admire and someone jokes I may like him too much because I think it would be disrespectful and I also feel really scared since my current age is higher than the age he died at, even if he was like two years younger than I am now when he died. Even if someone is a lot older I'm still scared I may say something bad without realising it. Even after many people explained I was the victim in the mentioned case I just keep thinking about people shifting the blame on the younger victims and I just feel like that even my existence is wrong and people who support me are just kind to me but maybe they are wrong. I feel like it's wrong for me to even exist.
@@Meanness_Scarplease consider therapy to have a proffessional help you unpack how this impacted you. TH-cam comment section cannot provide the level of support and knowledge that could help you
I think it's perfectly fine to have adults for friends if you're a kid, especially if they're helpful and supportive. But if there's one that starts acting like this, and you're either the parent or one of the more responsible adult friends seeing these behaviors, know what to say and who to call. Prioritize the safety of that child, even if they get mad at you for taking away their creepy "friend."
Having an adult as a "friend"?! Children and adults can not be friends.(As defined a mutual, equal respect and exchange within a relationship) Adults play roles in children's lives, especially if they aren't their parent, like teacher, coach, pastor, youth group leader, aunt, uncle, etc. A friend signifies a mutual respect and bond for the other person. A role is a part that is played for a specific purpose; to teach, to coach, to guide, etc. Children under the age of 18 are unaware of these nuanced definitions. (Especially, teenagers that are wanting independence and connection to their family, while being hormonal) Children learn about friendships from engaging with other children that are equal in age, interest, and are learning how to relate to people outside of their family unit. Through these experiences, children are learning how to relate to people their own age, with a few adults guiding them along the way. This is why children and adults can't be friends. Adults hold too much power over the child, and it's an imbalance of power.
@@alexisgarcia1344"This is why adults and children can't be friends, Adults hold too much power over the children" ok so even an "adult" just passed 18th birthday can't be friends with older teens(16-17)? a person who is just in adulthood can't have friendship with teens that are 16-17? I don't think an 18 year old who is new to adulthood will hold too much power over the teens.
@CoffeeRobin-cs1nf No one is saying 18 year olds know all about relationships. They are still learning to navigate life. An adult doesn't take an 18 year old very seriously. Their inexperience is evident to a healthy adult.
I’m glad this channel spreads light about these things and make people be seen, as a victim of grooming it’s hard to tell the signs when you don’t know what they are, but this makes it easier to know what they are and to be aware of them Thank you❤
Important to note: grooming could also reffer to more wholesome stuff in the animal kingdom. Also i have heared of grooming as in "grooming a son to take over the family business" The grooming mentioned in this video reffers specifically to child predators, may their souls perish from this world
not just child predators! while this video is more focused on child predation, alot of the topics are applicable to COCSA (Child-on-Child SA) and also relationships between adults. children (i mean children as in, those below 18) can groom eachother, and so can adults groom eachother.
when i was sa'd/groomed by my eldest sisters ex fiancée when i was 12 i looked for a vid that could validate my suspicions, didnt really find any but thankfully i didnt let it go on for more than a day. there needs to be more vids like this from more people. no one should shy away from these types of videos when it could help someone in the long run. kudos for making this, it can really help someone speak up before its too late.
This is all good information, but I think it's worth pointing out that in cases where a young person has seriously oppressive parents, and any person trying to be helpful might hit a few of those checkmarks incidentally.
Indeed, I think they said something of that extent at the start But indeed, strict, restrictive parents can drive the child away and creates the perfect opportunity for 'safe heaven' older people/adults
You may want to be mindful about how “oppressive parents” is defined. That term gets thrown around a lot, and like you said, does lead to situations where others can justify these types of behaviors.
@@HawkeyeVoid True, but I think it comes down to a you-know-it-when-you-see-it kind of situation. Like someone from CPS pulling children away from an abusive home, for example, could technically be considered "not respecting the parents boundaries."
Thank you for making this video!! It is so important to bring awareness to young people so they can be aware of the signs. Also it’s important for them to know what to do about it if it’s happening.
I’m really glad you made this video and shared it with everyone. This is definitely something that needs to be spoken more openly about. I appreciate all you do on this channel. Sending you lots of love today.❤❤
Timestamps 1). Excessive secrecy 1:32 2). Unexplained gifts 2:07 3). Special treatment or attention 2:30 4). Spending time alone 2:55 5). Allowing forbidden things 3:23 6). Excessive physical touching 4:03 7). Minimizing concerns 4:42 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Thank you for providing an informative and educational tool for children and parents. I used this video to explain to my child the importance of identifying these characteristics. We had a good discussion. 👍🏽
I love this example in the beginning where she's basically talking about when you're accusing someone of being a groomer without context, you're being an extreme disservice to the actual victims out there who have been actually groomed. I used to be friends with a kid whom I used to look up to until he made a video of him calling a guy out for being a predator with no evidence nor context, so that kid's casually a clout chaser and being the absolute worst disservice of all the victims who have been sexually hurt and groomed, and that's when I lost respect for the kid for making that terrible video (and the video is still up, unfortunately). And nowadays, on social media people are just now posting videos that everything is grooming, everything is this or that. I love Psych2Go's video for mentioning this in the video.
Especially considering how even within different nerd/geek communities and fandoms this frequently occurs in, it's definitely an important topic and glad Psych2Go finally made a video on this topic.
"You act more mature compare to kids your age." It's sad for the fact that alot of people are being groomed without noticing it... Mostly minors, because they want to shale their young minds, litle by little...
This video really helped. My dad displays all these signs but i was a kid. Im away from him now but i feel so genuinely sick that i relate to what is being said.
The worst thing is when parents allow grooming to happen. Believe it or not, many people don't believe their children. I told my mum that my uncle (her brother) was behaving very pedophilic and when I told her she got all angry and denied it just because it was her brother and it was awful.
When I turned 13, I got into a relationship with a 15-16 year old. I don’t know if my experience counts as grooming (it was online btw) but he was a compulsive liar, manipulating me to feel empathy for him, making up stories about his life that would get him empathy from others especially little children. Eventually, down the line, I don’t know if he also lied about this but he pretend to fake su1c1de and on an online app, I could only ping him and hope he’d respond. That’s how I started dating him, I felt so bad for him. Our relationship was a lie, a week later, he broke up with me then I developed feelings. Then he threatened to doxx my friends and me. I was so scared, so fucking scared. I was so scared he’d come hurt me, kill me, doxx me, or hunt me. Then I learned, he wanted to become my boyfriend so he could use me for his personal gain. I think he wanted me to kms. He’s 18 now. I’m still recovering. I’m so glad my situation didn’t get worse.
I was groomed online when i was 12 by a 29 year old man and it was quite disgusting so those kind of videos are really important!!! Thank you also i always loved the cute different art styles
I hate the fact that we need a video for this, the fact that it happened too many times that people now need to be alert at all times online is sad. The Internet should be safe.
Thank you for discussing this topic! 🥺 I’ve been a victim of grooming. I got groomed by a famous TH-camr who threatened to sue me if I ever come out about anything so naturally, I haven’t but I still talk about it to friends & family. It’s hard for victims to come out when there’s pressure if they do.
Honestly, grooming signs should be known by everyone. The fact that we need a channel like this is heartbreaking, because everyone should know about these topics.. but well, keep educating us, Psych2Go! 🧡
Same, buddy. I wish my paranoia was irrational in a "aliens Will Kidnap me" not the "i can be easily manipulated" way. Because last one holds some truth
@FaunaFae-kz6zg, I'm sorry for whatever you have just experienced then. If that's what you're trying to say. I hope you get the professional help you need.
This is an important topic that doesn't get discussed enough. Let us know what other topics you'd like us to cover. We would really appreciate it if you could help us by engaging with this content by leaving your thoughts here and sharing this video!
I've been doubting about someone who treated me like this and maybe i should take this video as a sign😭
Agreed.
This is an important video!
Grooming can also happen to adults, the way it happens is a bit different, but it’s important to remember it’s not exclusive to minors
This is a real serious sh*t for everybody to watch. It seems that not many people are preparing their young kids and teens to be fully aware of the shady world we live in.
Can u do grooming warning signs happening to adults and vulnerable adults?
The fact that there’s a need for this video is heartbreaking
This Video Could Literally Save Lives. 🙌🏻 🙏🏻 🤍
@lillyfahey1921 True, better to be aware than unaware.
But it’s been prevalent for the past fee decades. True, it’s sad.
It is but it’s also very important because many could benefit from it.
Or the fact that parents feel that children shouldn't be educated at all on anything sexual so they refuse to show this video to them.
The biggest red flag is definitely "You seem so mature for your age."
I don’t think half of all adults I know are groomers
i have 2 yr diff with my gf but she is like literally more mature, logical, and emotionally stronger than me 😭
My mother said that about me all the time when i was a kid so did others lol
That said I was speaking in full sentences at 7 months 😅
How is that a red flag? That is a praise... People see too much into small compliments like that :D
@@ThalonRamacorn I think it all comes down to HOW it's said.
It baffles me how schools don't have "keeping yourself safe" lessons. It should be a mandatory requirement like once a week
Edit: "keeping yourself safe" is the objective of the lessons, it obviously isn't/wouldn't be called that 🙄
Keeping yourself safe the amount of sexual abuse on your street should not surprise you people always make excuses.... why do you think everyone keeps talking about Epstien, Ellen and P Diddy it's rife In America and Britain just like racism!
@@user-ix5gf2on1w I'm not surprised by the amount of it all, that's why I said I'm baffled schools don't have the lessons?
@@pleasebekind7056 They don't care if a drag queen can walk in your school when it clearly the drag queen normalising their behaviour if that's really important do you think the school cares if a stranger or family member molested or raped teachers and head teachers don't care!
Then how does Bullies grow in a school Eco System.. Bullys are essential for weaker kids to grow..believe me I was bullied in Middle School and High School.. it made me feel weak. So I went to learn self defense after in community College even then I did get mugged in college too out of 40$ on knife point...it's a scary world we live in...
@@TheChainTV I'm literally talking about keeping kids safe from grooming. Why's kids bullying kids now been brought up?
When I was in middle school I met a friend's sister at my friend's birthday party. I was standoffish because of abuse that was happening at home? but her sister said I was "Cool" and started meeting me every single day at the bus stop. In the beginning we talked about TV-shows - but after a while she started by asking questions about my body and its maturity, then moved onto kissing and touching. My parents ignored it as "Friends" or "Friends sister", but this woman said she loved me and wanted to protect me from the family situation I was in. She joined the military and started buying me gaming consoles, clothes, games, weapons etc. It was a huge topic for years not to tell anyone, because she could get arrested. She would choke me, cut me with knives, and used to have me wear a collar for her? but she would also play it off as something normal (My parents thought it was a stylistic choice). Eventually she convinced me to move into her barracks with her. She would tell her coworkers I was family, or that I was her friend - then she would hook up with them behind the scenes while actively telling me she was dating me.
Years later, I had people tell me they would get messages from her saying to leave me alone, or that she would hover when other people tried to get near me? I remember once at a BBQ party, one of her superiors was put off by the age gap and tried to ask if I was ok? but I was heavily manipulated into thinking things were normal, and that I was in love. I remember everyone else at the BBQ played it off as "He's a boy who likes older girls/he's lucky", but this guy went out of his way to track me down when I wandered away from the group to ask more questions and I respect him for that now even if he never did anything to get me away from that situation (He still recognized it was wrong).
TLDR: A person being groomed isn't going to tell you "Hey I'm in danger", they might say "This is my friend" or "This is my partner" they might know not everything is normal, but see it as "A form of love specific to the person who cares for me". The kid might be going through other forms of abuse in their life? or be a survivor of extreme circumstances and see their situation as the better option. Don't take things at face value, even if a kid gets mad about you trying to help them they will be grateful years later.
that is horrible, i hope you're okay now
that is horrific, and what she did is so disgusting and so disgraceful to the military. but most importantly, it was disgraceful to you. i hope you're healing and having a better life now ☹️
Thats severely fucked. What is it with mfs in power and "trustworthy" positions being creeps? Ive been s/aed nd groomed by MULTIPLE (yes, MULTIPLE) fucking cops in my lifetime
I hope that you are in a safe place and on your way to physical and mental recovery ❤️🩹
I hope u all right but its kinda dumb for not calling for help or anything
"Special treatment or attention" yeah, it seems my childhood was safe
Bro got the middle child treatment 😭 🙏
Yikes
😭
Honestly same
Youch 😭
True, lol
My heart goes out to anyone who has been, or could've been a potential victim of grooming. It's a dark world we live in.
Thank you, it's mind damaging. But I'm currently healing every day!
happened to me a year ago, thanks!
happened to me when i had discord in secret without my parents. Guy eventually went offline one day after saying he was gonna commit suicide but i still think it's fake. The last known username of him was b1gb1rd.
I was a target but thankfully not a victim. My intuition has always been one of my strongest traits, so I pulled away whenever things felt off, thankfully. Less than a year later, the guy was found to be texting multiple teenage girls and lost his job. I haven’t told anyone not out of shame, but just because I’ve already processed it so it doesn’t really feel relevant. And because my parents wouldn’t leave pieces big enough to find.
Thank you, I’ve been a target but thankfully never a victim.
While this video is mainly directed at children who are especially vulnerable to grooming, adults can be manipulated and groomed too. I’ve had people try to groom me despite being in my 20s, trying to exploit my autism and how desperate I am for a stable relationship with someone I like.
This! 👆
I'm so sorry man! That sounds so incredibly awful! I hope you can find someone in your life that loves you for who you are, because you deserve that. I wish you nothing but the best for the future.
Sincerely: An Internet Stranger.
Bro. Same I had the same issue a couple times.
True I'm also scared and worried after I've struggle lonely issues, yet I'm still scared (at my own same age of 20, I'm just not ready to use the word 'trust other's' specifically)
I disagree since adults typically have more control of what happens to them compared to minors. Because it kills me how I’ve seen this word be misused as a means of dodging accountability over any bad decisions made. At the end of the day, there will always be terrible people in the world while it’s up to you through proper discernment to know who they are. Therefore, I don’t say this to invalidate your experience or anything, but looking at this from a different angle.
When I was younger, I got groomed online and I didn’t know at all. They weren’t even an adult but they made it so obvious that they were grooming me and that same person is still roaming to this day. I’m still recovering and when I tried to expose them for what they did no one listened :(
Who was it ? 🤔
@@SarahtheAutisticCartoongeek this dude from the splatoon fandom who (I believe) changed his name to “Sleepy Squid” to get away but he was known as Sleepybean when he did it
What do you mean by groomed online?
@@Lunarheartspokemon Oh hell no 😭💔 I'm so sorry 😔
@@jccuchvjvj like when an adult or an older person talks inappropriately or seggual to minors or kids 🤔
1:33 Excessive Secrecy
2:08 Unexplained Gifts
2:31 Special Treatment or Attention
2:56 Spending Time Alone
3:24 Allowing Forbidden Things
4:04 Excessive Physical Touching
4:43 Minimizing Concerns
@@davidarvingumazon5024 This isn't funny, you're weird...
@@Im_Just_A_Silly_Goober Not really weird.
"All slaves should be free"
"All slaves should be free"
Or read OP out of context simultaneously with two different perspectives, it's similar to logic of reading one sentence with different meanings.
The two different perspectives refers to:
Perspective 1: Read OP normally just like the vid's context
Perspective 2: Read OP out of context, this implies OP's every statements/claims are what most adults do-which will resulted reading one sentence with different meanings, hence making a joke.
Edit: O_O
Lots of people don't get my joke.
@@davidarvingumazon5024 What does that even mean...? Bro, not every adult is a pedo-
@@davidarvingumazon5024 are you confessing?
@@DinosaurNick That's moving the goalpost and poisoning the well, nice try but it won't work on me.
=_=
This channel makes me question my childhood, more often than not.
I'm so sorry
same
Damn I am sorry
sending lots of hugs and energy to you, i hope you know that it is okay to question your childhood and takes time to figure it all out
Sorry to hear :( How many signs did you relate to?
it doesnt just happen to kids, adults can groom other adults too. and it's not always sexual either.
Can confirm - first met my groomer at 13, then reunited at 16 - and he haunted me until I was 21 when we cut ties.
Grooming can happen to literally anyone.
Yeah it happens especially to adults who are vulnerable (for example due to mental disability) or when theres a strong power dynamic (like college teacher and their student). But kids are targeted more because theyre easier targets than most adults. We can definitely still acknowledge that there are adult victims
@@MirrorOruneREUNITED? now that's a worse fate
@@ghostthelizard😢 I have a mental disability and adult men are creepy af, I can confirm
And kids can groom adults too. My friend's sister groomed me at the party once and she was like 13, 14 max back then.
Unfortunately, I fell victim to it when I was a child. A few years have now passed and I've hardly spoken to anyone about it and every time someone says to me, "You're so grown up for your age," I feel sick and feel sick cold down my spine and it has done a lot of damage to me mentally and physically which is why I struggle with it every single day. In any case, what I want to say is to the adults, watch your children and what they do on their cell phones, iPads etc. and to the people who have the desire to do something like that, please get professional help. It's a crime to do that to someone and not cool.
Im so sorry you went through that as well. It is never too late to speak up or out, even if just to loved ones or a therapist. Part of leaving their control can be recovery and growth and not feeling guilty or ashamed because it was never your fault.
As a kid, I got groomed and thankful nothing happened but my god as an adult now I realise what happened it's quite scary. These types of warning sign videos are important to share. It could help someone.
We're hoping we can save lives before it's too late. Awareness is the key
Me too! Several times. I just recently unlocked a memory when I was 12/13 my mom wanting me to date my stepdads "young" coworker. My aunt and I were talking about it. She said my mom said "who cares how old he is if he buys her things" wtf. Thank goodness that young man was not comfortable with it. I remember just feeling confused but just standing there.
I have zero contact with my mother. She hasn't even met my 2nd baby. Only met my first once.
@@jenivettebigham7060I'm so sorry this happened to you, it weird how a memory can be triggered by something like a video. This is why these types of videos are so important and people should share experiences to make others aware so history doesn't repeat itself.
Same, luckily nothing happened because the caught it this year and he got investigated. He was a teacher at middle school and this year my mom found a text on my phone and reported it to the police. There were so many sighns from 11-14, I just turned 15 and the investigation ended like 3 months ago so it’s still on my mind a lot.
I'm a minor who had terrible past, watching this vid It triggered me so much that I remember my unwanted memories with my groomer when I was around 5-10 yrs until it happened again with another groomer who was my own father when I got 12-14, glad I told my mom the truth about his behavior or it would gotten worse if hadn't to, and they got divorced+ filed an case against that man...
It’s so sad that people will watch this and relate to it
I hope it can help them come out to get help if they are in the situation. It's not to shame anyone's in the experience but rather recognizing the situation and get the appropriate help
On both sides!
it scares me how my ex bf acted like this. Hes actually a future pedo-
@@IzzyBoo-ye1sf
How old are you?
@@Freakazoid12345 i wish to not say, but i am a minor
As someone that has been groomed before, I wish I had this knowledge back then. Now the damage has been done and all I can do is try to prevent it from happening to others. It does so much more damage than anyone may realize without having gone through it themselves. No amount of counseling or medication can undo it. Its up to the victim to be strong. If you too have been groomed or touched inappropriately and are reading this, then the fact you are reading this proves you are strong because you are still here as I am. You are not alone, so don't hesitate to speak out about what's going on, whether it be that you feel you are being groomed or already have been and are just trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered childhood. I know how you feel and even if those you go to may not know how it feels, they will understand you need help. Enjoy your childhood and innocents please. I never had the chance to
I’m the same as you ♥
Hey my friend is getting groomed by our teacher, he even has a wife but she says that it's fine with her but I slowly see her being obsessed with him.
And he still hadn't even give a name to their relationship like he had sexual relationship with her but hadn't ever asked he to be his girlfriend or anything what should I do?
@@user-xe3uw8tf3m You should report it to the authorities. If you are afraid, you can report it to the anonymous tip line
@@user-xe3uw8tf3m there's hotlines you can call and child protective services (they don't just deal with abuse within the family) I just googled pedophile hotlines and results came up
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that. You never deserved any of that, no one deserves that, and I'm proud of you for staying strong and are still living 🫂
show this vid to drakes girlfriends
NAH BRO NAH😭💀
NAWWWW
Under rated btw
Lol
STOP
NOOOO YOUR SO BAD FOR THISSSSSSSSSS
I was 14 and vented way too hard to someone, wish I knew what I was getting into before it went down hill. I just pray no one gets hurt like this!
Maybe don't vent anymore.
@@-originalLemon- Venting is normal. You just need find a trusted person
@@-originalLemon-That is also not healthy
@@leonkuwata6954"trusted person" that's going to take longer than blackbelthitoshis' interpretation on the word "In a moment" you might say "ooh get a therapist" but the problem is that for one, I am not going to spend my time complaining about all my problems to a person who doesn't even know who I am and probably doesn't care either, as a matter of a fact, all it would do is feed it's ego. And second of all I don't really, play among us anymore because it's just bots.
@@-originalLemon- 1) venting isn't complaining. It's different. People who vent seek support and solutions from others. People who complain don't.
2) very mature of you to make a joke, under a video about grooming.
3) your opinion IS valid. I won't tell you what to do. But the way you said "Maybe don't vent anymore" sounds like you're blaming the victim.
Yikes. I feel SO bad for minors who go through that.
Happened when I was 14-17 & I’m 22 now. The side effects are still strong.
Same @@lylyssy
@@naomilauzut92 😮😮 how are you coping after all of that happened? Does it bother you every day?
@@lylyssy the thing is, it kept happening back to back to a point where I just dissociated. I can't feel anything anymore. No emotions, no hatred, no love, nothing
I often fake my emotion to fit in but deep down inside I feel nothing for nobody. Not myself or anyone I love or care about.
So it's not really much coping, it's that I don't care about anything anymore
@@naomilauzut92Shi tragic
What's really sad is this happened at the golden age of Hollywood and child actors and actresses especially the 1930s-2000s.
Their autobiography and documentary about this saids it all.
Thank you so much. I have a friend who is under 15 and talks to people over the age of 20 explicitly. I've been doing my best to get them to block these people and not talk to them. It's a bit of a fight because they're so desperate for attention and they're hypersexual. Being over 18 myself, I refuse to address that with a 100 foot pole- but I just try to be there and check in with them and filter who they let into their life so they don't get hurt. They don't believe they're being groomed even though I've given them some signs and thinks its their fault for it and I want them to know it's not their fault and for them to get help for this. It's not easy and I'm sure a lot of kids are targets of grooming (I was at some point, but my parents forced me to give up my phone for a long time and I was scared of getting in trouble, so I didn't do it again-) Thanks again. I'm gonna send them this video and I really hope this helps..
There are monsters in this world, they are just disguised as people
This heartbreaking thing is how true this is. It's devastating how dark a place the world have become
It's so true. I always think of this quote from Supernatural "demons I get, people are crazy." It's sad to think that people are the real monsters in this world.
not disguised, humans are monsters, or not, every place, every group has some
i was groomed throighout the ages 7-12 and it was so bad that i literally thought i loved them. theyre really manipulative.. :(( tysm for spreading awareness
I'm sorry that happened ❤️ Hope you're feeling better now, stay safe)
sending lots of hugs and energy to you kae, i went through similar situation..except with family members, i do hope you able to be safe now and heal from it slowly
@@jing3rYu Thankyou ❤️❤️‼️
@@cherryuu24 Thank you i really appreciate it, im so sorry that happened to you also :(( i hope you feel better now /get better soon!
I'm so sorry you had to go through such a traumatic experience. It's heartbreaking how manipulative people can be, especially when targeting vulnerable young individuals. :(
Tripping is not really bad but find a good mycologist Who will teach you the right things you need to know
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Yes, dr.porassss. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
I wish they were readily available in my place.
Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac.
He's constantly talking about killing someone.
He's violent. Anyone reading this
Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
Is he on instagram?
Yes he is dr.porassss.
I hate the world. I hate that this is a thing that even can happen.
I was accused of even a *hint* of grooming activity while I was volunteering at a church. And once I realized that was what they were concerned about, I felt so betrayed and upset.
...then later in life, the Smash Bros shit happened, and a few years after that, I found out one of my cousins *was* being groomed by a priest in his community.
I hate it all. I hate this world.
Just to make sure to cut off anyone wondering, even though my comments don't normally get answered;
I used to volunteer at a church. Didn't even match my faith, but it was the first place I stumbled into after a panic attack, and they welcomed me into their College Age program, and then as a mentor for the Youth. I used to help set up drinks, then started bringing my WiiU and letting the kids do 8 player Smash before the service started, and I'd help the pastors and stuff.
One girl, who mighta been a freshmen at her oldest, expressed upset at going on a field trip without being with her friends, some grouping related thing. I told her it'd be good for her to make new friends and give it a shot; new experiences and all that. When she was still upset, I gave her my phone number and said to text me if she ever wanted to vent or give someone an ear, and I'd see it and try to reply even though I work/do school as well.
I then warned her group leader about her seeming upset about being lonely, and then I got talked *at* by like 4 different other adults that what I did was questionable at best, and potentially grooming.
Ignoring none of these signs at all being on the table, or how open I was about just trying to do the right thing, I couldn't have been any more hurt once the pieces got into place. As if I would prey on someone young enough to be my baby sister, particularly when I already had folks in my age bracket that I was trying to date.
..... and then in later years, I'd learn just how serious the community need be to keep any sort of adult-kid reaction to an absolute minimum, and how frailly small that line is. Let alone my Aunt telling us that my special-needs nephew had been getting inappropriate messages sent to him by his own minister, and being told to keep quiet about it by the bastard.
As hurt as I felt that the possibility of me doing such a horrifyingly wrong thing could EVER come up in anyone's mind, the realization that there are folk who DO commit such atrocities felt even worse.
I hate this world.
Did the KKK hillbilly community blame a drag queen and protect the pedophile priest?
Your right bad people live in this world, you shouldn’t hate the world, hate the crocked individuals. But just as I have free will to like this world, you too have the free will to hate this world too.
We are all beings which have dark and light with in ourselves the true test in life is which side you choose follow and no path is easy.
Never let others dictate how you should live your life, being friends with a child isn’t wrong, being supportive isn’t wrong either. People who manipulate good traits are evil.
Ditch that church or become spiritual, there are good people amongst the dark world.
The church is a really common grooming spot, given how much leaders and authority figures are glorified there. People also bring their children there frequently, and unfortunately wherever kids are is usually where the creeps will be too. That being said though, monsters lurk everywhere, it’s impossible to escape them. It’s sad but true.
All these signs happened with the “abducted in plain sight” girl. The neighbor who took her groomed her for years. He’d send her flowers after a play. He’d told her parents it was okay for him to spend time alone with her. He convinced them to let him sleep in her bed for “therapy” because he claimed he was told he had a problem liking young girls so he needed to sleep there to learn not to do anything to them. He got everyone in that family to trust him and then kidnapped her basically with the parents permission. She was supposed to go horseback riding with him, but they never came back and he tied her up in a trailer and convinced her aliens had kidnapped them both and she had to marry and have kids with him to help save their planet.
Real messed up stuff. He even had an affair with the mom because he had convinced her to trust him and that her husband didn’t love him like he did.
The girl was only a kid and teen at this time so she didn’t know better, and the parents were very naive because back then we didn’t know this stuff because there was no internet we easily could access info. This day and age I hope they wouldn’t known better, but back then this was a member of their church and they thought they could trust him.
Wow😳🥺 people can be really horrible and manipulative it’s crazy what you can convince someone of doing
I didn't know about this movie before, but I looked it up after reading your comment and apparently, it's a documentary based on something true? I was shocked and somewhat appalled. Just how can someone be so deviously manipulative?
@@arpanarastogi8756 yea I think I’ve seen it before
@@arpanarastogi8756 yes it is definitely a true story. He really was super manipulative to the whole family so he could get everyone to trust him so he could get away with his sick desires.
I'm so sorry but the parents were super dumb like he literally told them he liked children but they still let their daughter spend time with him is crazy💀💀💀
Thank you for making a video covering this topic, especially now when poor, younger individuals are becoming more and more victimised to grooming. I have friends who weren’t as lucky to avoid such awful things happening to them from overpowering adults in their childhoods, so hopefully this will help the children of today stay safe. Take care out there, youngens. ❤
Thank you so much! It's a truly important topic that doesn't get talked enough.
Thank you (*☻-☻*)
I may have heard too many stories about these types of things, and I especially hesitant to trust adults I haven’t trusted before, particularly men for some reason, but at least I know all the warnings and red flags. Thank you for making this video so more people can be educated
The groomer character is easily the most terrifying character design you have ever made guys.
I’m happy this video is here. As someone who was groomed, it truly is hard to tell if you’re being groomed without being taught what grooming is. I hope this video helps save many lives from this type of trauma. It truly is a difficult thing to go through and recover from.
thank you so much for making this. i hate how common it is that people are getting exposed for grooming, its sickening.
It piss me off some people try to normalize it. Like some weirdo try to say it ok.
@@litepaw7 yea like creeps like andrew tate and that.
You're welcome. It's deeply concerning how prevalent these issues are. If you ever need to talk or have questions about staying safe online, feel free to reach out. We might make more videos about it
I've noticed 7/7 of these signs in my father, I'm glad this video was shared, he has been overstepping my boundaries so much, and insists on keeping our interactions private. I hate to think this, but I'm realizing it's not normal. He constantly makes me uncomfortable and after my mother divorced him, it has gotten so much worse. Again, thank you for making this video, and I understand this is not something to throw around lightly.
i hope you get out of that situation. that sounds horrifying
I'm so glad that you noticed these signs. As best as you can, try to avoid him and stay with your mother if possible. Make her aware of the actions he has been doing. Remember, he is wrong and don't feel embarrassed about it because you are the victim. I really hope that it stops because people like that are truly disgusting. I hope you can heal from the damage he's already caused.
Im so sorry this is happening. Please tell trusted adults about this, your mother or other family, a teacher or school counsellor. If possible, write down what happens, or record and take screenshots of things that make you uncomfortable. You deserve to be safe and protected and i hope adults intervene to keep you safe. It is not your fault
As a person who got groomed online more than once, I'm glad people put awareness to this...This is a serious issue that people sadly overlooked and blame the victims for this, heck, this subject is mocked at! Thank you so much for this video, and I hope people who are experiencing the same thing are doing well. Remember, none of this is your fault, you're a minor. Innocent and pure❤. The one who should be ashamed is the groomer herself/himself!
Let's not forget that while applicable, between an adult and minor.
These same manipulative tactics can be used in age gap relationships, where one party is significantly younger. Just because they're 18 doesn't mean they can't be a victim.
Thank you for pointing this out, I don't think enough attention is given to this issue when it's two adults. I was in an age gap relationship like this for 7 years.
This is very true. I was in my very early 20s and met a man in his late 40s. We ended up "dating" but I have always had a terrible, sinking feeling when I look back on that time. Even though I was an adult, I was in an extremely vulnerable space and that man took advantage of it. It makes me mad and sad all in one.
@@ashleyrandall2160 thank you. After seeing your comment it got me thinking and realized that I too was groomed by 40 year old "friend" and former coworker while I was in my 20's. Looking back I remember all the times he bought and did things for me. He even went out of his way to take to meet my favorite celebrity, but obviously now it was so I can gain his trust. I had hit rock bottom that year. I was abused by my mom(back when I still lived with her) and mistreated at work to the point I fell down the rabbit hole of depression. I self harmed and it was visible. This is how he scoped me out because victims of abuse are easier to manipulate. It was when he started to get physical that I broke off the friendship. He used the "you threw me out like garbage" as a guilt tactic, but I was at least able to be strong enough to ignore that. I now know he was never a friend and he used me. Thank God I was never raped, but had I stayed with him longer it could have happened. Terrible people out there.
Yes and I hate how so many people romanticize it in books, mangas, doujins, yaoi, fan fictions, etc. It's not cute. While there are age gap relationships that are legit, they aren't common. The other age gap "relationships" are just grooming
@@ashleyrandall2160 then people think you are immune to grooming once you hit your 18th birthday
I have a friend who says he groomed someone. That’s because the other person said he did. My friend believed it to be true because it was his best friend who said such a thing. He sent me an unbelievable amount of screenshots, and I don’t believe he groomed the other person. This friend has never lied to me, that’s why I questioned him. Watching this video, I noticed: my friend did not do a single one of these. Him and his friend didn’t even talk all day, at most maybe 5 minutes at a time, 4-5 times a day (it was over discord, and she never wanted to call him). The only time they had hour long talks was when she was mad at him. He always told her to tell him if he did anything wrong, and she always said no. Even if it was something small, he’d apologize. Years into their friendship, she said he groomed her, and he just accepted it. Again, this guy’s never lied to me. Rereading everything he sent and spoke (we must have called for… maybe 4 hours just talking that one night), the only thing I noticed was he had a hard time picking up when she wanted to stop talking, so he’d keep going on about x subject. One day, she said it was so draining to be with him. It’s been… almost 2 years? He’s in alot better of a mindset, and has turned his life around, but I don’t believe he groomed her because he did ask for her approval for many things. I’m not trying to be vague, I just dont want this comment to be super absurdly long. I personally believe he was accused and just accepted it (until me and a couple of his other friends) told him he didn’t groom. The other person, I can only imagine her friends were on her side, but I was never friends with her to begin with, so I dont know her thoughts. On one hand, I am only getting one side of the story. On the other, again there was an absurd amount of screenshots, and I’m a slow reader, but it means I did see the talks they both had
I relate to this so much it makes me think you're talking about me when I'm reading this except I'm not he im a she, its hard bc u cant relly vent about being falsely accused for grooming bc of the hate from other ppl being suspicious of what you're saying, therefor i would like for no one to @ me on this pls.
I think I understand. I was accused of being verbally abusive for refusing to loan someone $20. I said no at normal tone, but she said I yelled at her because she interpreted as yelling. She then demanded I tell her why (she was bad to borrow money and and not pay it back and it was a tight week for me) and that I give her the $20 to compensate emotional damage. She didn't get the money.
I do wanna know how old they both were and if they ever talked about their dating life
People like this restore my faith in humanity :3 I have a girlfriend thtabis a lot younger than me and we are e-dating but I am not grooming her, we truly love eachother
HOW OLD WERE THEY?
Just the fact of them talking and texting each other is a BIG red flag. Not to mention them not agreeing on what happened beween them.
What’s sad is I always knew I had been groomed as a teenager but it took til I was 30 for my brain to really accept it. It’s like I told myself what had happened but my brain wouldn’t listen. It’s sad what the body does to protect itself.
You feel so special and loved, then you age out and get tossed aside. It really fucks with your head and the idea of love, they also have you convinced it was your idea to initiate these things. Btw I am in a much healthier place now as an adult and therapy helps. Videos like this are triggering as hell but it’s also comforting in a weird way. Thank you for making this and sharing the info
I think these types of lessons should be taught to kids, to keep them safe. Sometimes, ignorance isn't bliss. More children knowing these signs, knowing how to tell someone, and feeling safe doing so, is a perfect way to help kids avoid these types of things. This isn't talked about enough. Schools, parents, etc, treat it as a hush-hush topic. When doing so, you're making the kids not feel safe to talk about if something is going on. It breaks my heart knowing there's kids out here as I say this who think it's better to stay quiet because the environments they've been in have taught them that.
Babes this was a year too late but thanks 🥰
damn this is funny but i’m still real sorry for u ❤❤ u got this
I am so sorry that happened to you. I hope you get the justice you deserve.❤❤ Keep going babes 🫂
FR same for me
3 years for me
@@arpanarastogi8756 I stopped it before it got too far, it still bothers me but now I can help others.
Idk why but some of those seems familiar
stay safe, don't let harm get to you AND don't harm anyone either
It should be noted that grooming can also be done for non-sexual purposes (grooming a child to be like a parent's therapist or 'friend'- a shoulder to lean on and put their adult burdens on- for example), and the manipulation used in grooming can match up with other types of abuse and manipulation (I.e. special attention, random gift giving both match up with signs of love bombing).
@@Someone-or8tp woah.. that's also grooming?
@@ashsa07 not in the traditional sense, but the idea of introducing adult topics to a child who isn't old enough to fully understand or navigate them consensually, there's an undeniable overlap. Even if it's not sexual, it's still inappropriate, right?
Like if one parent is venting about their problems with your other parent, or talking about issues with their personal life and friends, or (for example) offering you alcohol because you're "so mature, you're the only friend I can talk to about this, so what's the harm in a drink between friends? Oh, but don't tell your teachers I did this. It's a secret between us, okay?" You can't deny that these are all the characteristics of grooming.
@@Someone-or8tp I really appreciate the time you took to explain everything so clearly, I understand it a lot better now. Thank you so much!!
Seeing videos like these and knowing there’s a need for videos like these is absolutely heartbreaking. I was lucky as a child because for some reason I was veryyyyy aware of stranger danger and stayed the hell away from from older people especially men.
It’s so sad that people have downgraded in such a manner that videos like these need to be made. Thank you for spreading this information
Seeing this video while having legal issues with family is honestly wild 🙏
Sending lots of love on your way!
sending lots of hugs and energy to your way, i pray that you able to get the justice that you deserve
@@cherryuu24 Thank you! I really needed that honestly, I wish you the best as well!
@@Psych2go TH-cam skipped giving a notification from you for some reason, pardon me.
But thank you nonetheless! I find comfort in your videos, so please keep making them!
Dear lord, all of these match.
I made many adult friends, and many took advantage of me. The trying to spend alone time, trying to talk about topics related to s** and telling me that he was only trying to educate me, trying to build trust with me, the excessive touching which he tried to justify saying "people do this in many cultures as a sign of affection", then trying to make me think I should keep my involvement with him secret, as his wife and my parents everyone will misunderstand, everyone is too " judgemental", the constant gift giving to make me feel indebted and make me let my guard down, even though I didn’t want to most of the time, and always telling me I should go to him whenever I have issues I need advice on,
And most importantly
When I noticed how excessive he was being as he harassed me, he was saying that he thought I was mature. Basically, trying to make me think that since I'm more mature compared to everyone my age, I should do things he wants to make me do.
Everyone reading this, please stay safe. I only came to the chilling realization when he was actively trying to do s**** harassment, and even then I doubted and blamed myself for days. I am so traumatised I struggle to live normally as I used to. I'm completely shattered mentally. Everyone please be safe, and if you are a parent, be a trustable adult to your child. Otherwise they'll hide things from you and eventually end up in serious situations.
Sorry you had to go through this, hope you're doing better now :)
@@OtterSkull Thank you, and if you could, please read the comment now as I had to edit it since I couldn’t finish writing everything due to keyboard issues.
I am so sorry that you went through that.
@@TR_wsr1 Thanks, I read your edit, just know that none of it was your fault and feel free to talk to someone that is close to you and that you trust.
Please consider going to therapy, it will help.
Stay safe and have a nice day!
@@OtterSkull thanks for your kind words!
Thank you for covering this. I’ve seen people throw this around simply because they weren’t happy in a relationship. Accusations of such matter are very serious and can ruin an individuals life whether they are innocent or not.
I think this topic should be talked about more to increase awareness. I have went through this early in my life and I'm glad that there is validation here. Keep up the great videos 💟
There’s one misrepresentation in this video. According to psychiatrist, including Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a lead expert on narcissism, and law enforcement, grooming can also be done to adults. This video is really important because it focuses on grooming on children as an issue but it should say that grooming could be done on anyone, but the focus today would be on what grooming looks like with children. The incomplete definition set up adults who are victims of grooming to be invalidated.
That being said, it would also be cool if you guys could do a video on what it looks like for adult victims.
adults groomed by adults? lol
Before anyone replies, I just want to emphasize that this video is very important and should not be muddied with including adult grooming It just should make sure the definition at the beginning is complete so there isn’t a misunderstanding.
@@raheemahnitoto3099 adults cannot never be groomed because that's already consensual. only 18 yrs and below fits the definition of being groomed or minors.
@@juanpaologalua5869 thats not funny. it frequently happens. grooming is manipulation. you being an adult doesnt mean you wont feel pride or pressure when another adult love bombs you. it doesnt mean you wont break rules (typically laws) when another adult tells you to. it doesnt mean you wont be told to keep a toxic relationship a secret because an adult tells you to. it doesnt mean you wont have issues saying no when another adult pressures you.
these things happen all the time. alot of adults have reported being pressured into activities by these groomers. whats crappy is, unlike with children, they cant do much anything about it in the ways of law.
@@juanpaologalua5869 this is a misunderstanding that I’m talking about. Adults can be coerced my grooming. It happens a lot in cults. If you look at the strict definition of grooming, it states that. I am quoting information from psychology and law enforcement.
Not taking them into consideration, causes more harm.
Wow I'm 11 and I didn't know what grooming was thank you for the info!
Yea that term is getting more commonly known these days. It's also not too uncommon, that big content creators (especially those that make children related content) abuse their position and do this to their own fans, privately. I think around 3-5 (max) content creators I used to watch in my childhood, are p€dos, which can come to light even after many years, sometimes.
Why are you 11 and on the internet, please don't let out your age like that
@@pearltem5826 yes, but well at least it helped
Very important topic to know! I'm glad this video can help you.
@@pearltem5826it’s true. Although it’s the same for me. Of course, I tried to make a “but actually” but everything sounded creepy, especially in the context of this video.
Ty for this!!!!! We all need to educate ourselves and our children. You guys are the best
You’re welcome.
This video is so important and especially to bring awareness to those who are currently unaware and are struggling, my heart goes out to people are are currently struggling because this is such a hard thing to go through
coming from someone who was falsely accused of grooming, this hits hard to say the least, the person who did so gaslit me to the point where I accepted that I was a paedophile, when i wasnt, these are sensitive topics so I will not give my opinion. that is all.
I also had this kind of situation. Someone who was always saying different age forced me to write some things with them, saying like they are depressed but maybe writing something I'm scared of can help. Also saying that friends always say they love each other so I must say I love them and things like saying they are worried when I don't talk so I must talk even if they don't reply. And of course sending lots of adult drawings while knowing I'm scared of adult things and then also sending drawings of my fave characters. Soon people started saying that I'm bad that I'm evil and, well, you can guess what. I was told that person sent them the screenshots of something like me saying "I love you" but without their whole forcing me to say it. Or said that I asked them to draw scary things. I didn't know they really did that, I asked them and they kept saying people are just jealous, then suddenly blocked me and I was scared because I thought they may die as they always mentioned it, like saying they may, well, end their life if I won't do what they tell me to do. They always told me they are just a bit younger than me but always used the phrase "I'm a baby". Something like "I don't understand anything, I'm just a baby". When I got worried after they blocked me people just kept saying it's good for them that they blocked me. Few years later some people helped me realise that I was probably gaslit. But there were people who said they know that person was the abuser but still I'm bad for doing what they told me to do. Then this person suddenly messaged me again saying they may forgive me but I must write scary things with them. When I told them I must know they are adult before talking with them just for safety they blocked me again and lots of random people messaged me saying I'm a groomer, people started to block me, I got banned from few servers. Soon later I joined one server and just normally talked with many people, one person was saying they are a child but when I asked if I can help with homework they always refused and often started talking about things not suitable for children. When I was worried about it people just brushed it off and then suddenly I got banned. And again, lots of "groomer" messages. But this person kept saying that others are jealous of our friendship and things like "You can admire me in secret" that was creepy. And suddenly someone who said they are 17 started writing really adult things to me and almost demanding to reply in the same way. When I explained I'm scared they said that they were told to do it to get proofs that I'm a, well, you know. But when they realised that I'm scared and tried to instead explain people I'm not evil, they lost contact with people who send them. Of course, the person who send them was the "admire in secret" person. Later this sent person said they have 14th birthday. So, someone sent them to an adult, telling them to write adult things and lie about their age to pretend to be "legal" so an adult may take a bite and write something scary while they were like 13 and it was all to find "proofs" to frame someone to be worse than a murderer. It scares me to think someone really used a child to do it, either really thinking I'm evil and sending a child while thinking I may do something worse than death to them or knowing I would never do anything like it and making a huge plot using a child only to fabricate "proofs" to accuse me for the worst thing in the world. Even up until today I sometimes get messages like "Groomer", "I know what you did to X" (X being the first person mentioned) and now when I want to tell a friend I like them I always say "I like you in a safe, friendly way, without any bad intentions" to just make sure it won't be misunderstood or used against me. For many years I wanted to erase myself because I believed I may accidentally hurt someone without realising it. I don't think about adult things and I know I sometimes accidentally may joke about something normal and people may find a different meaning. Or I say something normal for me and people laugh and I just need someone to explain me that it can have a different meaning. So I'm always scared I may say something like "I like you, you are great" and someone may think I'm trying to court them. Once one older than me person was saying they are so bad, so ugly and so on and after I told they "You are great" I was accused for love bombing. I also always deeply look into anything I watch or read before recommending it to anyone because I'm scared that maybe, just maybe, there is even one nanoscond not good for kids and people would think I'm sending it with bad intentions. Even if the person is older than me. So in the end I'm scared of everyone, myself included, the whole world itself. I'm also feeling guilty when I talk about the historical person I admire and someone jokes I may like him too much because I think it would be disrespectful and I also feel really scared since my current age is higher than the age he died at, even if he was like two years younger than I am now when he died. Even if someone is a lot older I'm still scared I may say something bad without realising it. Even after many people explained I was the victim in the mentioned case I just keep thinking about people shifting the blame on the younger victims and I just feel like that even my existence is wrong and people who support me are just kind to me but maybe they are wrong. I feel like it's wrong for me to even exist.
Im sorry that happened to you. Have you considered therapy to unpack how that impacted you and what happened in the situation?
@@Meanness_Scarplease consider therapy to have a proffessional help you unpack how this impacted you. TH-cam comment section cannot provide the level of support and knowledge that could help you
@@littleann8138 I'm sorry
can you tell me the age gap between you and the accuser?
im just curious
I think it's perfectly fine to have adults for friends if you're a kid, especially if they're helpful and supportive. But if there's one that starts acting like this, and you're either the parent or one of the more responsible adult friends seeing these behaviors, know what to say and who to call. Prioritize the safety of that child, even if they get mad at you for taking away their creepy "friend."
Yeah I agree! Children may not understand but they will in the future. It's about explaining it to them.
Having an adult as a "friend"?! Children and adults can not be friends.(As defined a mutual, equal respect and exchange within a relationship) Adults play roles in children's lives, especially if they aren't their parent, like teacher, coach, pastor, youth group leader, aunt, uncle, etc. A friend signifies a mutual respect and bond for the other person. A role is a part that is played for a specific purpose; to teach, to coach, to guide, etc. Children under the age of 18 are unaware of these nuanced definitions. (Especially, teenagers that are wanting independence and connection to their family, while being hormonal) Children learn about friendships from engaging with other children that are equal in age, interest, and are learning how to relate to people outside of their family unit. Through these experiences, children are learning how to relate to people their own age, with a few adults guiding them along the way. This is why children and adults can't be friends. Adults hold too much power over the child, and it's an imbalance of power.
@@alexisgarcia1344"This is why adults and children can't be friends, Adults hold too much power over the children"
ok so even an "adult" just passed 18th birthday can't be friends with older teens(16-17)? a person who is just in adulthood can't have friendship with teens that are 16-17? I don't think an 18 year old who is new to adulthood will hold too much power over the teens.
@@alexisgarcia1344 Oh yes because obviosuly when it's your 18th birthday you suddenly gain a bunch of knowledge about relationships
@CoffeeRobin-cs1nf No one is saying 18 year olds know all about relationships. They are still learning to navigate life. An adult doesn't take an 18 year old very seriously. Their inexperience is evident to a healthy adult.
Please educate the children!!! I almost fell victim. Protect kids at all cost.
HOW AM I NOW JUST SEEING THIS, I NEEDED THIS SO MUCH, THANK YOU 😭🙏🏽
Yay the female voice is back
Amanda is always here! :) Thanks for the love for her!
this female voice makes me feel a little uncomfortable tbh. it feels like it's taken from some se##al ASMR. (without offense)
@@fyran6453maybe you should stop watching that kinda asmr so much
@@fyran6453hop off your device p.rn addict
@@user-s0m30n3he watching mommy asmr 7/24 ig
This is scary, but I'm glad that they made this video
Thank you for the love and support!
On internet those cases are daily to happen, this video helps alot others to understand it
I’m glad this channel spreads light about these things and make people be seen, as a victim of grooming it’s hard to tell the signs when you don’t know what they are, but this makes it easier to know what they are and to be aware of them
Thank you❤
I wish my younger self would've known this.. This is so important to learn the warning signs!! Trust your gut!
Important to note: grooming could also reffer to more wholesome stuff in the animal kingdom.
Also i have heared of grooming as in "grooming a son to take over the family business"
The grooming mentioned in this video reffers specifically to child predators, may their souls perish from this world
not just child predators! while this video is more focused on child predation, alot of the topics are applicable to COCSA (Child-on-Child SA) and also relationships between adults. children (i mean children as in, those below 18) can groom eachother, and so can adults groom eachother.
@@chaoticcow4357 The adult version is called dating.
The word “predator” can be used at any age
@@abdoulm.sorofino2642 and also as its original meaning as in a creature that hunts other creatures for food. Like wolves, owls, cats, and many more!
@@BenLWolfYou couldn't be further from correct.
when i was sa'd/groomed by my eldest sisters ex fiancée when i was 12 i looked for a vid that could validate my suspicions, didnt really find any but thankfully i didnt let it go on for more than a day. there needs to be more vids like this from more people.
no one should shy away from these types of videos when it could help someone in the long run. kudos for making this, it can really help someone speak up before its too late.
This video needs to be spread across youtube.
This is all good information, but I think it's worth pointing out that in cases where a young person has seriously oppressive parents, and any person trying to be helpful might hit a few of those checkmarks incidentally.
Indeed, I think they said something of that extent at the start
But indeed, strict, restrictive parents can drive the child away and creates the perfect opportunity for 'safe heaven' older people/adults
You may want to be mindful about how “oppressive parents” is defined. That term gets thrown around a lot, and like you said, does lead to situations where others can justify these types of behaviors.
“Your parents are oppressive” is exactly what a groomer would say
@@HawkeyeVoid True, but I think it comes down to a you-know-it-when-you-see-it kind of situation. Like someone from CPS pulling children away from an abusive home, for example, could technically be considered "not respecting the parents boundaries."
I read this as 7 warning signs of gooning. No regrets.
NAUUR 💀
thank you for using your platform to spread awareness about such things! my heart goes out to all victims of grooming
Thank you for making this video!! It is so important to bring awareness to young people so they can be aware of the signs. Also it’s important for them to know what to do about it if it’s happening.
I’m really glad you made this video and shared it with everyone. This is definitely something that needs to be spoken more openly about. I appreciate all you do on this channel. Sending you lots of love today.❤❤
Glad this helps!! :) We hope more people will benefit from this video and this information keeps more people safe.
Thanks for talking about these difficult subjects. It's definitely helpful. ❤
Glad this helps!! :) We hope more people will benefit from this video and this information keeps more people safe.
Thank you for this video! It is so important 🙏🙏🙏
Timestamps
1). Excessive secrecy 1:32
2). Unexplained gifts 2:07
3). Special treatment or attention 2:30
4). Spending time alone 2:55
5). Allowing forbidden things 3:23
6). Excessive physical touching 4:03
7). Minimizing concerns 4:42
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Yay her voice is back I love her sm thanks for the video guys!💕
Thank you so much for this.
You explain it in ways that is very understandable and a big thing is to not go near strangers that touch you a lot
Thank you for providing an informative and educational tool for children and parents. I used this video to explain to my child the importance of identifying these characteristics. We had a good discussion. 👍🏽
I love this example in the beginning where she's basically talking about when you're accusing someone of being a groomer without context, you're being an extreme disservice to the actual victims out there who have been actually groomed. I used to be friends with a kid whom I used to look up to until he made a video of him calling a guy out for being a predator with no evidence nor context, so that kid's casually a clout chaser and being the absolute worst disservice of all the victims who have been sexually hurt and groomed, and that's when I lost respect for the kid for making that terrible video (and the video is still up, unfortunately). And nowadays, on social media people are just now posting videos that everything is grooming, everything is this or that. I love Psych2Go's video for mentioning this in the video.
Especially considering how even within different nerd/geek communities and fandoms this frequently occurs in, it's definitely an important topic and glad Psych2Go finally made a video on this topic.
Thank you for making this.
This channel teaches me more about important things that my primary and secondary school has done combined
"You act more mature compare to kids your age."
It's sad for the fact that alot of people are being groomed without noticing it... Mostly minors, because they want to shale their young minds, litle by little...
Thank you for posting this video, these have educated me a lot.
Glad this helps!! :) We hope more people will benefit from this video and this information keeps more people safe.
@@Psych2go Yes:) I know lots of people at my school have hard home lives and I’m trying to help:)
This video really helped. My dad displays all these signs but i was a kid. Im away from him now but i feel so genuinely sick that i relate to what is being said.
this broke my heart, I don't want anyone to go through such a horrendous thing.
The worst thing is when parents allow grooming to happen. Believe it or not, many people don't believe their children. I told my mum that my uncle (her brother) was behaving very pedophilic and when I told her she got all angry and denied it just because it was her brother and it was awful.
When I turned 13, I got into a relationship with a 15-16 year old. I don’t know if my experience counts as grooming (it was online btw) but he was a compulsive liar, manipulating me to feel empathy for him, making up stories about his life that would get him empathy from others especially little children. Eventually, down the line, I don’t know if he also lied about this but he pretend to fake su1c1de and on an online app, I could only ping him and hope he’d respond. That’s how I started dating him, I felt so bad for him. Our relationship was a lie, a week later, he broke up with me then I developed feelings. Then he threatened to doxx my friends and me.
I was so scared, so fucking scared. I was so scared he’d come hurt me, kill me, doxx me, or hunt me.
Then I learned, he wanted to become my boyfriend so he could use me for his personal gain. I think he wanted me to kms. He’s 18 now. I’m still recovering. I’m so glad my situation didn’t get worse.
I don't know if that does count or not but he definitely wasn't in the right place at all
@@tthfhhgheeee he groomed (to a more accurate definition of it) my friend too so DARN HIM!
Unfortunately, this happened to me as a teenager.
Thank you so much for this video.
It's a great thing to make people aware of.
Sorry to hear that. I hope you get the help to heal
maybe its not related to the video but amanda you're baaack i miss your voice so much 😭❤❤
I was groomed online when i was 12 by a 29 year old man and it was quite disgusting so those kind of videos are really important!!! Thank you also i always loved the cute different art styles
I didn't knew about it 😮 Thankyou 😊❤
omg I didn't even realize that this happened to me when I was 9 years old and this year!! thank you so much for making this informational video 😭😭
Thanks for teaching me!
All your video are Awesome.
I hate the fact that we need a video for this, the fact that it happened too many times that people now need to be alert at all times online is sad. The Internet should be safe.
Not a nice topic to learn about but has to be taught, so thanks for sharing!
Thank you for discussing this topic! 🥺 I’ve been a victim of grooming. I got groomed by a famous TH-camr who threatened to sue me if I ever come out about anything so naturally, I haven’t but I still talk about it to friends & family. It’s hard for victims to come out when there’s pressure if they do.
Honestly, grooming signs should be known by everyone. The fact that we need a channel like this is heartbreaking, because everyone should know about these topics.. but well, keep educating us, Psych2Go! 🧡
This is why I like being alone, I have major trust issues with people.
It makes sense because people are so f&cked these days.. Keep your sanity and dignity
I agree unfortunately
same dude (unless I can just trust my friends only)
I prefer to be alone too, but not because of any grooming - people just bore me
Same, buddy. I wish my paranoia was irrational in a "aliens Will Kidnap me" not the "i can be easily manipulated" way. Because last one holds some truth
Thank you for this I’ve been groomed before and this made me realize all of the signs that I saw but didn’t realize❤
Thank you so much I will try watch out for these Signs on my Discord
Well this was a few years late but thank you
the timing of this.... is horrifying
What happened a groomer was exposed?
@FaunaFae-kz6zg, I'm sorry for whatever you have just experienced then. If that's what you're trying to say. I hope you get the professional help you need.
Who was exposed?
hope ur good
I remember my groomer 😭 he was 17\18 and i was 12. Im very happy that more awareness is being spread.
Thank you for making this video i rly needed it