Weekend Update: Trump Selling $60 Bibles, Francis Scott Key Bridge Collapses - SNL
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 มี.ค. 2024
- Weekend Update anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che tackle the week's biggest news, like former Presidents Bill Clinton and Barack Obama attending a fundraiser for President Joe Biden in New York City.
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#SNL #RamyYoussef #SNL49 #TravisScott - ตลก
The translator joke was underrated
Structurally perfect.
@@dannywilliams2358 Naw, the timing was off.
Yes..lmao
@@imdawolfman2698 that's the delivery. The joke is structurally perfect. Not debatable
Flawless
“I have many” ….sure you do, it’s called inventory.
I wonder if he read "thou shall not commit adultery", something he can relate to.
@@marysmith8638 😂😂😂😂🫡🫡🫡
This comment needs more upvotes
@@daleal7250 Why? What would that accomplish? It’s only just barely a joke
It's called "No one is buying that crap!!!!!"
Those of us who served during the Gulf War hated that the song "God Bless the USA" was the song associated with us because he was a draft dodger during Vietnam.
Chickenhawks be like
you're mistaken anyone gives a 💩 about your opinion
We played that at every air show and he came to sing it live in our hangar, I left.
Bone spurs?
I knew that guy had bad vibes! I can't blame someone for wanting to run from a war, and I am in awe of family members who served. But don't act like you're some super patriot afterwards and monetize the lie.
Someone made a joke saying he's selling shoes and bibles now because he ran out of classified documents.
That's what Biden did
@@Conservadouche93 What did the Saudis give Jared 2 billion for?
@@Conservadouche93no he didn't trump did
@@trumpy9223 that's what they want you to think
Biden, trump, and pence all had classified documents.
Biden found them, reported them, and was let off due to nothing criminal happening. It was his own notes from the obama administration.
Pence found classified documents, reported it to the government, and was let off, cause he was honest and no crime was commited.
Trump took hundreds of boxes of classified information, shared it with billionaires and world leaders, got caught by the fbi, refused to give the boxes back, etc.
Thats why trump is facing jail time, and biden or pence isn't.@@Conservadouche93
That Boeing CEO stepping down joke was absolutely beautiful!
Before Hootie, there was Charley Pride.
CoughLilNasXcoughcough
@@Bombadil-ez9ns Hootie and Pride have been around long before Lil Nas X was even born.
Charley Pride was awesome beyond category.
I know Charlie, but hootie who?
Before Lil Nas X there was Lil Nas I - IX
Don the Con selling Bible is like a Serial Killer selling Life Insurance.
Hannibal Lecter selling steak knives.
Hannibal Lector selling salads.@@xelasomar4614
How else are you going to find your markd?
Or like a cereal killer selling Cheerios.
I'm DEAD ☠️ LIMBO ‼️😂😅🤣❤️
Before BeYonce and before Hootie charting the Country music charts, the FIRST successful Black WOMAN Country Singer was Linda Martell. The first black MALE country singer was DeFord Bailey, followed by Charlie Pride, later Darius Rucker. BTW: THE FIRST SUCCESSFUL BLACK FEMALE TELEVISION STAR WHO HAD HER OWN TV SHOW was Diahne Carroll who played a nurse in "JULIA"
Nobody cares.......................
So far, 51 people care.
@@sdhartley74 LOL.
@marblox9300 91 at this point, and in particular, I appreciate the mention of DeFord Bailey, who is often forgotten but essential.
@@sdhartley74 More care...we just haven't had a chance to blow this post up yet. Give us a moment.
Anyone check The Hilton? I hear they’re short a few hundred bibles.
Hahaha!
and the Four Seasons (the hotel, not the landscaping company)
The Gideons. Jahovah's Witnesses are planing to sue Trump for Breach of Contract.
Oh good one, SNL should hire you!!
Honestly I can’t get enough of SNL Weekend Update. My favorite part of SNL
Because you join sheep cheers 🎉❤❤
@@steveconn Is DOnnie your favorite rapist?
This is literally the only part of the show I watch. Colin and Michael should have their own show!
It's my favorite part of ANYTHING!!
It’s everyone’s favorite part of SNL. Sometimes the skits are just lame. The only time I ever find them funny is when Justin Timberlake is a guest. I don’t know if he brings his own writers with him or what but the skits are always always always funnier when he’s a guest or a host.
"God's letter of resignation" Amen!!
Sanctified by 🔥
I figured he'd dedicate the book to tramp in the foreword.
I accept his resignation.
That was 2024 years ago.
Trump was attending a wake for a fallen police officer. The other presidents were collecting millions. This isn’t funny anymore
older FL teens need a place to post their sonograms. That one had me crying. Best joke of the night
Please ask NASA to use the James Webb Telescope to find my sides after that one!
Woke joke
I thought they were going to do a creepy Matt Gaetz joke there.
@@hugoafonso2102😂😂😂 would have been on point
@@walterwhite1 Awww, poor baby.
There's the prediction of Carlin's...the Bible draped in a flag
Isn't that Sinclair Lewis?
@KingoftheJuice18 All I know is it's true
When Fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.
It's Sinclair Lewis originally. @@kp0121
Carlin would be no fan of the war mongering Democrats either.
The sonogram joke was top notch
That crucifixion joke killed me 😂😂😂
Yeah, that one killed me too.
It also killed someone else.
Agree, Colbert had a pretty good line for this story too.
Recently on my way home from work I drove behind a pickup truck with "TRUMP WON" on the tail gate. On the back window they had stickers that said "Joe and Hoe" and "Gavin Newsom pees sitting down." There was also a really big dent in the driver side door... almost like someone kicked the shit out of it
People like that are so embarrassing. If I were Trump and knew folks like him supported me and behaved like that I would be completely embarrassed. No one would be more embarrassed, believe me.
Trump did win. The election was rigged because the deep state wanted him out
He did win. It was rigged
@@Conservadouche93trump is literally the leader of the deepstate they do anything he tells them to
@@Conservadouche933.5 yrs still not a shred of evidence 😂 do you need a few more weeks
Im glad che give hootie some love the guy is a legend
nicholasgarrick8855.
The only reason hoodie is singing country music is because hootie and the blowfish went from large stadiums to small bars in one year. He moved on to his next grift. He is nothing but a glorified pop singer. Beyonce on the other hand is a superstar.
@@howardzdenek98 😐 what's _your_ "grift?"
Darius Rucker!
@@howardzdenek98 get a job
Stop saying Hootie. You guys never saw the Key & Peele episode.🤷🏽♂ 🤣🤣🤣
With America's separation of church and state, thankfully most Bibles sold in the USA still don't include copies of the U.S. Constitution, Pledge of Allegiance, and the Bill of Rights--those documents are best found elsewhere.
Though I think God's resignation is a legitimate addition
All these documents are free to read.
"letter of resignation" 😂😂😂 exactly
I'm always shocked a bible doesn't burst into flames in his tiny orange hands.
I'm wondering if Buden is even aware of the fact that they even exist
"Each cover is made with the finest asbestos..." 🤗
@@Conservadouche93 Joe Biden is a practicing Catholic, and goes to Church every Sunday. Trump never attends Church and doesn't know anything about the Bible other than grifting people like you with buying them.
@@Conservadouche93Biden is very religious. Probably the only thing I like more about Trump than Biden is that Trump is not religious.
@jaredf6205 he said Buden. Who heck is that
Next week: trump sells his videotape with stormy daniels!!!
Hell, I'd pay to see that! But only if Stormy got the $
Week after next: trump will be selling his family's used underwear at a flea market auction!💙
😂😂😂
That will be classified as a short film.
What a scary thought
THE ULTIMATE GRIFT 😂😂😂
Yeah, Biden's pretty good at it after being a politician for over half a century
🤣😭😂
@@Conservadouche93 this comment of yours makes no sense.
@@vidmasterK1 They're trolling just ignore them
😂😂
Missed the fact that $59.99 upside down is 666s
Oh Word
Wait, what does 666 mean?
@@MillerCrimesit’s the number of the beast/antichrist..
@@MillerCrimes Mark of the Devil
holy cow! you are right!
That nuts & bolts line literally made me laugh out loud! Genius!!
Che ,and jost are cooking tonight great weekend update.
Just Jost. Che doesn't understand "less is more".
How is Trump’s Bible not sacrilegious?
I mean this is the absolute definition of sacrilegious.
C’mon Trump supporters… Wake up!
You need to wake up. Have you noticed Joe napping his way toward the nursing home? Or do you choose to ignore his behaviors?
@Conservadouche93 we can't afford trumps high taxes and inflation and his wide open border
@trumpy9223 that's Biden you maroon
@Conservadouche93 well you're clearly unable to take a joke about Trump. Snowflake alert!
@@vidmasterK1 you need to learn how to read American
*While CEO of Boeing was stepping down, part of the airstair broke apart.
CEO: "Ain't my problem anymore!"
And going to get a big FAT check to boot!! 😶
@@James-vl1xd literally n figuratively the golden parachute
@@MrWascally real Talk, Have a Happy and SAFE EASTER,😎✌️
I'm surprised that Trump wasn't still at the TX border to recruit more cleaning staff.
Trump and the Bible go hand in hand like Trump and him honoring his marriage vows! 😂
You sound like a peach. 😂
Sleeping with sex workers while his 3rd wife is recovering from childbirth. Classy 😅
@@Ilovedogsmorethanpeoplewell the truth hurts.
I suspect there's no cross on the front of that bible because Donnie always demanded they 'capitalize the 'T'.
It might be more abstract (as 💩 is inept with grammar, spelling, and literacy in general) and more ego-driven.
The cross was how they executed Jesus. 💩’s Bible would have an electric chair on the cover.
He's got sneakers with the big T for trader.
@@matthewstearns289 So close.
"I Quit" 🤣
Happy Easter, SNL families
- the Son of God
I wish religion itself would quit.
Amen! Can I get a hallelujah? 😂
easter is actually a pagan holiday/ritual look it up in a dictionary the word easter mentioned in the Bible in Acts 12: is a mis translation of the greek word pascha which means passover more to it of course but that's the short version of the truth which i only found out a few years ago
Combining the very two things the founding fathers said must be kept separate🙄🤦♂️
Its a dangerous game
@@bovinityleak2066 it’s not only that it anti American
Holy crap this weekend update was 🔥
Yeah man
Three Ds for: DesperateDon, DelusionalDon, and DisfunctionalDon 😂
Delusional Dems...DEI Dems...Dangerous Dems
I was expecting a Matt Gaetz joke with that Social Media ban 😅
Me Too ! 🤣
Same lol
Sometimes you just got to write your own material!
I guess technically it could've been about Gaetz as it was
One upside of this crazy world is that these two will never be short on material 🤣
That sonogram joke was top tier.
Please explain that joke.
@@ursulawanza8674Ron DeSantis signed a 6-Week Abortion Ban so they’re saying that since teenagers will be forced to carry a baby to full term, they need a place to post their ultrasound/sonogram photos. Basically they’re saying that Ron DeSantis cares enough about kids to ban them from TikTok and Instagram, but not enough to allow a teenager to get an abortion if they wanted or needed to.
ohtani joke got biggest laugh from me
Poor Darius Rucker… *Imagine having to **#constantly** tell people **_who love you and your music:_*
*🗣️ MY NAME **_IS NOT_** HOOTIE❗️*
Seriously.
That’s called Job Security.
At least people remember him for SOMETHING….
And it has gotten him filthy rich. For his net worth my name can be Hootie
Key & Peele did a skit about that. 😢
I have to imagine that decades of the world calling Darius “Hootie” carries into the joke. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
He is selling Bibles? Bibles should be given to people..
Because that's about how much they're worth? OK, please consider this an SNL joke. You KNOW they would have done it.
That's what they do around here. Local grocery store got a table with free Bibles as soon as you walk in the door. But things are different in the big city.
Not the Prosperity Gospel edition.
(Charley Pride.)
I always wanted to be a backup dancer for Charlie Pride.😊
People seem to be quick to forget that The Pointer Sisters won a Grammy for Best Country Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group in 1974 for their song Fairytale.
Trump will definitely have a ton of Bibles in his home when his entire inventory remains unsold.
Lets be real... it probably already sold out.
Collin, I'm a born and raised Floridian and you nailed Ron Desantis and that 🤣 🤙🏼💚🏵️
The weekend update is still so good.
Hilarious! "Christians" might reread the Bible to discover what's in it. Like having no other Gods before Me...the orange idol..
The Bible also says homosexuality is a crime
I bet they would be a real fire hazard if Emporer Cheeto ever touched a real bible
How many Gideons bibles comeout of his hotels?
Every single joke hit hard 😅
All the people coming to defend Hootie learning his name is actually Darius Rucker .😮
th-cam.com/video/FE9PUexeUv0/w-d-xo.html
I love that they called him 'Hootie.' Half of America doesn't know Darius Rucker's actual name.
Was this based on a poll that was taken?? LOL!
Awful lot of these, "half of America, most of America" proclamations being thrown around...
Is there a list we can access?
Yeah and the other half doesn’t know who hootie is
That Ohtani translator joke was hilarious.
Charley Pride, Linda Martell...🤦♀️
Keefus MacGee, DooLittle Dumpkins, Shadrack Johnston III, Lil' Cuntry, MC Pickup, CHACHA, Skillbilly Jenkins, Mr. Donald, Philacious Trevante Gooch, Lady D'Elicious, Samantha Hotentot, Zuwalli, Phillip Tuffmore, Pig Latin Pete,
....the list goes on.
People died on that bridge... Too soon.
100k people die on this planet, every day, in every way...
Toughen up...
Upvoted wish I could have done it more than once
The Biden and Trump jokes hit the most
But the Key Bridge joke hit so hard the bridge collapsed
especially trump! The Biden jokes are 99% unoriginal and boring by now.
@@chrisrj9871 Biden is the joke!
@@chrisrj9871 i agree most of the Biden jokes tend to be just an easy "he soo old", it is overused now....this one was okay-ish basically "all these other people, everyone is more excited to see than Biden"....and the Trump jokes, I mean that orange clown has done and continues to do sooooo many things to laugh at.....selling bibles now😂🤣
@@chrisrj9871they have run the same jokes with trump for nearly 8 years now?
When he said I have many. He meant houses. Not Bibles
probably from ones donated for his rentals/ hotel rooms from religious organizations
Pontious Pilate has been reincarnated as Donald Trump.
That bridge jokes was hilarious 😂.
Unless you're related to the missing bridge workers, plus it wasn't in NY so yeah, hilarious!!
Great great writing tonight ❤❤❤
Where’s the Fani Willis skit???
Che is so hilarious when he tells a bad joke. The look on his face is priceless 🤣
That BOEING “nuts and bolts” joke was hilarious 😂
His name is Darius Rucker, not Hootie
I think he knows...it was a joke NOT History!
We're just gonna have to agree to disagree on this one
@@jackiechristian-di6sy it’s part of a Key and Peele bit
Lies. He is only Hootie.
I think these two are single-handedly saving SNL.
Along with the guy who plays Trump. He sounds just like him. I will never vote for him but I enjoy a good impression of him.
"I thought Rhonda McDaniel was a drag version of Ronald McDonald" lmao 😂
Greenwood isn't a country music star anymore, now he's just another grifter.
Banning social media for kids under 14 is actually a very good idea.
Can't believe I agree with that shell of a human being, DeSantis.
Tasteless when it comes to bridge jokes!
It was about Biden not connecting with Africa Americans, which is true.
This was Gold!! Thanks for the laughs! Honestly, if a fiction writer created a former President character selling gold gym shoes, 1" pieces of his sedition suit and bibles w/ all sorts of secular stuff incl pizza coupons + amendments, it would be dismissed as mere drivel. Absolutely amazing grift - in plain sight!
The Boeing joke😂😂😂
That bridge joke was brutal my guy
But true.
Why do I always have to guess which part of Weekend Update goes where? I don't mind that you cut the segment up in multiple pieces, but just at a number or something at the end so I know which video to pick first etc... damn.
No love for HOOTIE? How about no love for CHARLEY PRIDE!
1962-- Ray Charles --I Can't Stop loving You --Number one on BLACK COUNTRY MUSIC CHARTS😢
Those 4 minutes passed FLYING!
Charley Pride says hello.
The US is the only country that is obsessed with personal freedom, while clamoring for authoritarian rule.
The only #$%#s here in America voting for autocrats are the Commie-red cap cultists; who got duped by a clown!
Have to say. Female Ronald McDonald is an improvement over the clown show Ronna recently presided over.
It's nice for Donald to put all the documents Republicans don't believe in into one book.
I love how Michael is now just trying to piss off the audience.
No love for Hootie? How about no love for Charlie Pride?!!!
I’m shocked that the Bible didn’t burst into flames in his hand😂😂
You misunderstood him. He didn't say, "Everyone should have a bible in their home, and I have many [bibles]" but what he said was, "Everyone should have a bible in their home, and I have many [homes]."
It doesn't make him any less of a blasphemous son of a bitch? What's your point?
No he meant bibles because right after that awkward pause following "many..." he says that The Bible is his favorite book.
The Daily Show covered this grift earlier last week and had that full complete quote from the video Trump posted.
@@vidmasterK1your wrong
@@Conservadouche93 wrong about what exactly
Selling God’s book is the most corrupt thing i ever heard of..
Preachers scam all the time.
What did people expect, Trump is a grifter.
Religion was created by corrupt, so not surprising
@@JanetBeebe-nh9re*gifter
A guy like Trump would put Jesus in a table flippin' mood, for sure.
Absolutely showing some love for Darius. And what about Charlie Pride?
Texas Hold'em is not great.
She is just making money off her followers.
@@craigbritton1089Gee! She’s not the first. Bible?
I’ve been waiting for this all week. Lol
I always called them Hootie and the owls. If I was ever on a game show I would lose.
Selling them for $60, when true followers have a rough time giving the orange ones out for free?
Wow, it took someone with quite the nerve to do jokes about the Francis Scott Key bridge collapse. Good luck processing all the complaint letters.
Letters? These days, I think they get about as many actual letters as cuneiform tablets.
Great writing! Thank you!! Intelligent, snarky, and full of acerbic wit and parody aimed at all-now that’s our SNL!!! ❤
Was waiting for this😂😂😂😂
I only watch SNL for the news
I'm sure the families of the dead workers found the Baltimore bridge jokes bloody hilarious!
They weren't disrespectful to the dead.
This year will suck for most of us no matter what but at least you guys are only putting out gold. Thank you ❤
This and Last Week Tonight are how I get my news 🤣
Why no jokes about Diddy?
P Diddle
"At Boeing, when one door blows open...another one closes behind me"
Trump the former president has become that vendor at every Fourth of July event pushing a shopping carriage full of flashing crap that attracts childish minds and fails to work after 48 hours.
Tragedy + time (at least 4 days) = Comedy!
Hootie! No love for Hootie?!🤣
Also..the drag version of Ronald McDonald is Marjorie Taylor
'Never getting pulled over by a cop' is right
"sarcasm" is what Colin OBVIOUSLY meant...
I met Darius Rucker when he performed in AZ some years ago. He was courteous and thanked each of us stagehands for the job we were doing.
The translator joke crushed me. 😂😂😂