Yes. Discrimination I experience for being autistic is captured by what’s called the “Uncanny Valley” hypothesis: I don’t resemble the majority’s experience of how a human emotes, and so they project their discomfort onto my character and aptitude.
Yep, I have social quirks and society will definitely put you in a certain box of sorts. Then I just improved my social skills to such a degree that I just “mask” in social situations . It does the trick and doesn’t allow for strangeness to enter . It’s pretty exhausting though as I have to put in so much effort into asking questions and pretending to be interested etc etc .
I experienced this at around 12 years of age, so it's pretty much spot on. No one ever explained to me how this would fck my life up so much. I've felt like a failure but after hearing this it sounds like it was totally out of my control.
I was born to fail it seems like I hate how my mother tries to glamorize autism like it's some special gift that makes you special when in reality it truly is a debilitating condition to live with I feel like an alien inside my own body what is wrong with me my mom and other NT family members just doesn't get it.
Yeah if you have autism, Asperger’s or social phobia - your life will be drastically reduced in many ways. There are times when I try to think of just how impairing my life is due to this social problem but that tends to put me in a dark headspace so I try not to. But yeah, when someone looks normal and actually looks above average in terms of health but has some type of socuss as l disorder - it’s harder because people can’t see it. They just know something is off
@@sadieadler4383 in all fairness, I don’t think we can expect NTs to understand what it is to be like us. I don’t understand what it’s like to have cancer or be paralyzed ey etc .. I’ve honestly just stopped being around most people these days as it’s easier - less frustration
@@gothitbyatrainagree. I’m finding more people online simply just watch channels like this endlessly all the while not trying to actually change their life . They really need to get offline more as it’s warping their minds
Sat in a bar once, laughing, joking all night. Thought I was having a good time. Then a woman says to me 'Do you ever smile?' That set me off. I walked out. Dramatic but I didn't know how to deal with it and I was a younger man. Has happened a few times. Normally some fat, gobby wifey. Be different if I said to them 'Do you ever think about going to the gym? Losing a bit of weight?' Then there's the 'You're so serious' , 'Cheer up it might never happen' , 'You're so miserable' , This is normally from complete strangers. Have learnt as I've gotten older to shrug it off, it's just normie language but damn it sure used to hurt. It's their sht banter I guess, and with women I think it's their 'sht testing' like the way a woman tests a man. Have learnt to be less annoyed, not take it personally (although it is personal I guess) and generally respond something like 'That's just my face' as I've gotten older. Does catch me off guard sometimes. Got me the other week in a charity shop when I asked 'How much is this?' She responded something like '£1 if you give me a smile' ... I just walked out, didn't buy it. Yeah...then last year I had this thing, was walking round forcing smiles, like trying to bring something out of myself. Long story short it was pretty stressful and inauthentic, and I felt like a goofball. Also embarrassed myself pretty bad once or twice trying to be 'normal and pleasant'. I decided to cut that out. Realised I was literally trying to impress people. 40 year old male trying to impress people, acting something I'm not, like someone trying to be more popular in high-school. I said to myself seriously just cut that out. Being myself, coming to terms with it all actually. Been a long trip to full circle to realise this. Feeling more relaxed, like quite a bit more okay with it these days. People don't like me they don't like me /shrug.
I remember sitting on the bus looking out the window after school one day when I was maybe 8 or 9 years old. An older girl from my neighbor suddenly said my name and, "Are you OK!? You look like you're about to cry!" ..it startled me. I had no idea I looked like that and I felt fine. I sometimes see my face reflected in a mirror or window when I feel fine or when photos are taken and I look completely blank or upset and it's upsetting to me to see it because that's not what I feel on the inside. I've tried to joke that I have "resting B face"...if I force the look of "happiness" that people project in photographs I look weird and deranged. Having pictures taken is one of the most uncomfortable experiences for me. Can anyone else relate to this?
Yeah my Dr said it's very common for autistic people to end up not married. Which 99% looks like it'll be me as well. That's why I'm focusing on ethical hacking as a life's work/passion. Without that (and my family/dog) there's a high risk of coming face-to-face with the darkness. Also I want to focus on contributing to the growth of my nephews/nieces, and hopefully leave them money when I pass (as getting a house these days pretty much depends on that sort of thing).
Comorbid anxiety and depression sounds about right you always feel like the black sheep in a lot of ways it's really hard to maintain relationships or even form connections when everyone else seems turned off by you because of how you present yourself.
I can relate to the extra anxiety and depression and sense of strangeness that results from autism . I did manage to learn good social skills when I was younger but I still find the entire act of socializing as just tedious and downright exhausting. Btw I did learn to make myself more presentable and attractive to others but again it just zaps me of all energy
@@mcchickenmuhchicken If only you knew me in person you would know that I was a mistake from the moment I was conceived I can't save myself and neither can you or anybody else for that matter I can't change who I am as a person even if I'm a terrible person.
@@sadieadler4383well you need to see a therapist so he can help you with those negative thoughts. You will never get better if you watch videos like this and not put effort in to improving yourself
Imagine being a female with autism. You're rejected by females, rejected by males or worse taken advantage of. Being alone is the most comfortable so I can get out all the wiggles and singing privately. Causes problems on job, in relationship, in friendships. The best encounters are those who have autism, except I also have a personality disorder so I'm extra level "crazy" and misunderstood. OH well. Life is short and the small beautiful things like dogs and children's laughter and genuine kindness and sunshine on water and mountains made this worth it. But hell is likely here, and the sleep at that good night sounds peaceful. I only wish to be of more use until my final breath. I am fighting abuse against my level 3 sister with autism in her group home but I slipped through the cracks, our mother has mental illness and her and my guardians hated me and kept me from getting help. My lucky break is...I am smart. It's served me well, although I've seen too much. True innocence is what few people have but often those with autism are easy for me to talk to because they still maintain a level of this. True heaven within.
My ex would randomly hum/sing. I’m quite sure she was what’s known as quiet bpd. I actually mostly enjoyed my time with her because she wouldn’t rare at me like my ex wife would. I kind of liked her quirks. Best of luck to you it can be hard being “different” but I pray we all can find people that love and support us. I’m currently in social withdrawal and working through loneliness as he mentioned in the video.
@Dr. Von’s Life Investing I think its interesting you are working 'through" but not trying to 'fix' it. We are who we are and sometimes working with what we have may make our days that much bearable at least for me because the isolation and inability to interact is isolating. Best.
I've been pinballing back and forth between massive amounts of anxiety and soul crushing depression. Really sucks. I don't have anything else to add besides this and the thanks for reading thru this article.
Yeah I don’t see how any kid growing up w/autism doesn’t suffer from depression and anxiety . Plus for some of us - we weren’t even aware of autism until our 20s so that didn’t help . What’s worse is fixing these two issues is not easy and medication just adds additional side effects. Daily exercise is a must
I cured my depression, and I can say that depression is not caused by autism, it's caused by being less successful than the average person in society. When you work your ass off for a few years and get a girlfriend and a very high paying job, it's impossible to feel depressed with Asperger's syndrome. Living with Aspergers is like playing life on Ultra Hard mode, but once you beat it and reach the top, it's the most rewarding feeling ever, trust me. And it also results in you being more disciplined than 99% of the population, because 99% of the population doesn't have any big weights to train their discipline muscle.
Aaron, if you're really serious about finding love & a partner in life; seek out someone who is also autistic. There must be online groups that could assist with this. Best of wishes to you and your endeavors with finding love! 💗
@スノー I actually find it's the opposite. Neurodivergent people and especially people on the spectrum generally have a natural attraction to one another because we have similarities. People with ASD relate to one another on a level that neurotypicals don't.
Ive noticed there are quite a number of autistic couples out there.. Struggling with different issues but able to come together and understand each other and work out each others day to day problems and anxieties.
Really enjoyed your Livestream today. I'm on a break from loading trucks, but putting this in my history to watch after work. I feel like the reason I've failed to have normal connections as an adult greatly stems from my disconnect from other children as a child.
Growing up i always thought I was normal but just really shy. That's what my mom would say, "oh he's just shy" when i wouldn't want to talk or interact socially. I've never had any really close friendships or relationships. It wasn't until my late 20's that I realized I have aspergers. It's helped me understand myself better and has given answers to why my life experience have been what they are. However I don't want the diagnosis of autism to become a crutch or an excuse. That's an easy trap to fall into. We can't let it define who we are as a person.
Hi Aaron! Thank you for your channel ! Can I ask if you had any therapies as a child (after diagnosis)? (Your channel is amazing; you’ll see faster traction if you upload more long form videos at least twice a week! )
Loved hearing you share this article! I could listen to you read articles like this all day and I’m bot joking. You’ve got such a calming voice, definitely goes well with this type of content!
"The happiness in your life is determined by the quality of your thoughts" if you were present with your thoughts you'd realise really quickly how much your past is dictating your present and future. Learning proper mindless meditation would do you alot of good sir, focus and find new ways to have the life you want instead of expressing why you think you don't. The difference in mindset alone will attract the right people in your life. Don't chase and you will find is the key.
Hi Aaron! I keep missing your live streams, not happy about that at all. Oh well, it's nice to see you again on your channel. Been reading these comments here, it always amazes me how people want to give advice on something they haven't experienced themselves. I've never been autistic, but I know people who are...if people would just take the time to get to know someone before labeling them as this or that, it would be a much better world for sure. I have very few "friends" and can relate to how you feel at times...most people can't understand someone that doesn't "fit their pattern" of what people should be...each person is an individual, not good or bad, just an individual with their own personality. I find that I stay home, when I know most people will be out...and go out when most people will be in, if that makes any sense. It's hard to explain, I just find it more peaceful NOT to be around most people. I enjoy your videos and can relate to a lot of what you say on those videos too. Keep making the videos Aaron, and know there are people out there that want to know what you have to say, I'm one of those people who want to know what you have to say...have a good week ahead, one day at a time. Was able to catch the last 5-10 minutes of your live stream after all! 🤗
So good to see im not a lone Alien ^^ Just recent i discoverd the stoic principals for life, which are really helpful to live my life happier. I recommend :)
I suspect it is harder for autistic men than autistic women in the realm of finding a romantic partner. But I am an autistic woman and I struggle in the same way. Men always say it’s because women have “too high” standards, but my standards are not unrealistic (I actually like short men, for example). Men just aren’t interested in me because at first glance I seem like a robot. I don’t know how to seem open or express interest in men I do like. I’m 24 and never had any romantic experience, never held anyone’s hand. Only two boys have expressed interest in me. One had a girlfriend and was mentally disabled, the other gave me a drawing of himself committing suicide. I do have some standards! I did go on one date from online dating, and we seemed to hit it off online, but once the guy met me in person he ghosted me.
All this stuff about autistic people having it worse than anyone including people with other types of developmental issues... I've always known it. I've learned to deal with it so long ago I don't even bother talking about it anymore.
Im autistic, and truck driver as well. I have no close friends and I live alone, only ever had short romantic relationships with women. They quickly find I am autistic and lose all interest. 38 yrs old
I’m not on the spectrum but due to extreme crappy childhood I struggle At starting and maintaining relationships because of abuse and girls bullying me in school. Add insult to injury I’m average at best looking
Have you thought about switching to a career that doesn't involve any face-to-face interaction? I'm a research scientist but I taught myself to day trade by taking classes online and I'm considering doing it full-time. I like research but I can't take the interactions anymore. You're too smart to be driving a truck anyway. I used to do jobs like that and I was miserable. I've found I can't really change myself, but I CAN change my environment.
reducing personal interaction doesn't sound like solution but more like a way to accerbate a difficult situation. those of us on the spectrum need to learn ways to be more at ease with who we are and try to maintain contact with real world people and not hide away. it may not always be comfortable, but that's life in a nutshell.
@@redshoesgirl It's not hiding. It's just removing the part of your life where you're interacting with people you don't want to, in situations you don't want to be in, where you're not free to be yourself, because it's part of your job. I'm all about social interactions that I choose, as in friends, hobbies, family, etc.
@@redshoesgirl agree. There have been times in my life where I reduced the social interaction greatly thinking it would help improve my life. Welll it didn’t and I found myself deteriorating . I wish just reducing social Interaction fixed this problem but it doesn’t
@@mcchickenmuhchickenyep, I get the vibe from him and many others in his situation. They reduce most face to face social interaction and are left to talking to people online casually. This does not help things . I see younger people with social issues and I cringe when they explain how they spend almost all of their time online. Young people with social issues need to socialize and how to read people and improve social skills
I've seen several articles mention that autistic men do awful in the dating market (while women seem to do okay). Not that you'd need such articles, because it feels like common sense to me.
From the perspective of someone who isnt autistic: Its AWKWARD. When someone is awkward in an interaction, it makes the situation weird and the non autistic person has to know why you're acting weird. We take it as if you have a problem with us or the situation and its natural to want to know why someone is acting "off". Being socially awkward can come off this way to someone who isnt socially awkward. Im not autistic, but I hate prolonged eye contact, so I kind of get some of that.
being Austistic is far easier when you are Gay, BUT it's still not idea... i myself (autistic gay male) get bashed & judged a lot by other men because of my strange sense of style & my interests & boundaries. but still... im VERY GLAD i don't have to try to impress women at all, however, a lot of girls i met always want to be friends with me but i think that's just because they know im a fruit but i appreciate it :)
And it’s all a massive mess when you’re like me: LGBTQ, autism spectrum, ADHD, hypothyroid disease, small intestinal bacterial overgrowth, numerous chemical absorption and digestion issues. Bad health is certainly a cross to bear, with none of them standing out above the others.
Still watch your Vlogs and podcasts and I really feel for you in that a lot of what is happened to you happened to me as well. It just feels like you’re the target for everything. Growing up, where are you pretty much the target for everything? Like, did a lot of kids want to shoot you with spit wads or throw things at you? And did you ever get volunteered to sit in a dunking machine for a fundraiser? that one can be humiliating.
That is a great question that I’ve wondered about . Looking back I wish my parents were more aware of the social issues I was having . I tried to blend in as best I could and was good at sports so this helped me hide my issues a bit better. That said, even if you seek help early - what treatment Options are there aside from just learning social skills and how to cope with this disorder?
@@brianmeen2158 Yeah I don't know. I was thinking something like an after school group with other kids with autism. Maybe some genuine connections could have formed through something like that.
I wish they would've taken my severe anxiety seriously and had me mentally checked out for my complete lack of social skills instead of pushing this "god" sht over and over
Is there anyway you can up your energy levels? Even faking it. Will help you with relationships. I mean that with nothing but love for you and a sincere desire for you to be happy.
The link to the article wouldn't post.. but basically as women delay childbirth later and later the chances of having an autistic child increase, ironically increasing the future problem
I can't help but feel like a lot of these issues are... normal? I would say a lot of ppl could relate to all this autistic or not. I certainly can. I hope im not autistic 😳
I made it to the end and I feel I should share that I also have depression and anxiety. But wait there’s more 😂 a little ocd plus RA and fibromyalgia 🙃🫠 I sound far worse than I am but I struggle like everyone. I just use humor to lighten everyone up. I’m always embarrassed no matter where I go and people have openly asked me if I’m playing stupid. Let’s not go into all the names I was called. I just try and remember I’m here today and I deserve to be here like anyone else. Please remember you do too! Well wishes and you just let me go with you with you and I’ll talk to this man in the warehouse! Let him try then!
Yes. Discrimination I experience for being autistic is captured by what’s called the “Uncanny Valley” hypothesis: I don’t resemble the majority’s experience of how a human emotes, and so they project their discomfort onto my character and aptitude.
You sir, are my childhood!
Wow the REAL Tay Zonday, a living meme legend.
Heh I've seen you here and on Louis Rosmans channels
Yep, I have social quirks and society will definitely put you in a certain box of sorts. Then I just improved my social skills to such a degree that I just “mask” in social situations . It does the trick and doesn’t allow for strangeness to enter . It’s pretty exhausting though as I have to put in so much effort into asking questions and pretending to be interested etc etc .
Thank you for sharing, Tay!
You are not playing the cards you've been dealt, you are the cards.
who is the dealer
I experienced this at around 12 years of age, so it's pretty much spot on. No one ever explained to me how this would fck my life up so much. I've felt like a failure but after hearing this it sounds like it was totally out of my control.
I was born to fail it seems like I hate how my mother tries to glamorize autism like it's some special gift that makes you special when in reality it truly is a debilitating condition to live with I feel like an alien inside my own body what is wrong with me my mom and other NT family members just doesn't get it.
Yeah if you have autism, Asperger’s or social phobia - your life will be drastically reduced in many ways. There are times when I try to think of just how impairing my life is due to this social problem but that tends to put me in a dark headspace so I try not to. But yeah, when someone looks normal and actually looks above average in terms of health but has some type of socuss as l disorder - it’s harder because people can’t see it. They just know something is off
@@sadieadler4383 in all fairness, I don’t think we can expect NTs to understand what it is to be like us. I don’t understand what it’s like to have cancer or be paralyzed ey etc .. I’ve honestly just stopped being around most people these days as it’s easier - less frustration
Im simply waiting for the end at this point. I dont click with other people no matter what
I hear you, man. I hear you.
Bog - try to see a doctor about your issues. There are medications that can help reduce the hopelessness. Daily exercise also helps
@@brianmeen2158 I already did that and i need a social life not pills. thanks tho
@@bog6106 I hear you so are you trying to build social skills and social life? How often do you go out socially?
@@gothitbyatrainagree. I’m finding more people online simply just watch channels like this endlessly all the while not trying to actually change their life . They really need to get offline more as it’s warping their minds
Sat in a bar once, laughing, joking all night. Thought I was having a good time. Then a woman says to me 'Do you ever smile?' That set me off. I walked out. Dramatic but I didn't know how to deal with it and I was a younger man. Has happened a few times. Normally some fat, gobby wifey. Be different if I said to them 'Do you ever think about going to the gym? Losing a bit of weight?' Then there's the 'You're so serious' , 'Cheer up it might never happen' , 'You're so miserable' , This is normally from complete strangers. Have learnt as I've gotten older to shrug it off, it's just normie language but damn it sure used to hurt. It's their sht banter I guess, and with women I think it's their 'sht testing' like the way a woman tests a man. Have learnt to be less annoyed, not take it personally (although it is personal I guess) and generally respond something like 'That's just my face' as I've gotten older. Does catch me off guard sometimes. Got me the other week in a charity shop when I asked 'How much is this?' She responded something like '£1 if you give me a smile' ... I just walked out, didn't buy it. Yeah...then last year I had this thing, was walking round forcing smiles, like trying to bring something out of myself. Long story short it was pretty stressful and inauthentic, and I felt like a goofball. Also embarrassed myself pretty bad once or twice trying to be 'normal and pleasant'. I decided to cut that out. Realised I was literally trying to impress people. 40 year old male trying to impress people, acting something I'm not, like someone trying to be more popular in high-school. I said to myself seriously just cut that out. Being myself, coming to terms with it all actually. Been a long trip to full circle to realise this. Feeling more relaxed, like quite a bit more okay with it these days. People don't like me they don't like me /shrug.
It's horrible when they call you quiet as well.
@@mcchickenmuhchicken Probably yes
Trust me, women get this all the time. Every person working in service is basically required to be happy for the job
The dont smile thing happened to me before too
I remember sitting on the bus looking out the window after school one day when I was maybe 8 or 9 years old. An older girl from my neighbor suddenly said my name and, "Are you OK!? You look like you're about to cry!" ..it startled me. I had no idea I looked like that and I felt fine. I sometimes see my face reflected in a mirror or window when I feel fine or when photos are taken and I look completely blank or upset and it's upsetting to me to see it because that's not what I feel on the inside. I've tried to joke that I have "resting B face"...if I force the look of "happiness" that people project in photographs I look weird and deranged. Having pictures taken is one of the most uncomfortable experiences for me. Can anyone else relate to this?
Yeah my Dr said it's very common for autistic people to end up not married. Which 99% looks like it'll be me as well. That's why I'm focusing on ethical hacking as a life's work/passion. Without that (and my family/dog) there's a high risk of coming face-to-face with the darkness. Also I want to focus on contributing to the growth of my nephews/nieces, and hopefully leave them money when I pass (as getting a house these days pretty much depends on that sort of thing).
How do you cope when the copes stop being copes?
Comorbid anxiety and depression sounds about right you always feel like the black sheep in a lot of ways it's really hard to maintain relationships or even form connections when everyone else seems turned off by you because of how you present yourself.
I can relate to the extra anxiety and depression and sense of strangeness that results from autism . I did manage to learn good social skills when I was younger but I still find the entire act of socializing as just tedious and downright exhausting. Btw I did learn to make myself more presentable and attractive to others but again it just zaps me of all energy
@@injectthemtdew6698 I think it's too late for me to get better I'm a lost cause at this point.
@@mcchickenmuhchicken If only you knew me in person you would know that I was a mistake from the moment I was conceived I can't save myself and neither can you or anybody else for that matter I can't change who I am as a person even if I'm a terrible person.
@@sadieadler4383well you need to see a therapist so he can help you with those negative thoughts. You will never get better if you watch videos like this and not put effort in to improving yourself
I don’t know how to act anymore. Every time in a public space my mind is racing
Imagine being a female with autism. You're rejected by females, rejected by males or worse taken advantage of. Being alone is the most comfortable so I can get out all the wiggles and singing privately. Causes problems on job, in relationship, in friendships. The best encounters are those who have autism, except I also have a personality disorder so I'm extra level "crazy" and misunderstood. OH well. Life is short and the small beautiful things like dogs and children's laughter and genuine kindness and sunshine on water and mountains made this worth it. But hell is likely here, and the sleep at that good night sounds peaceful. I only wish to be of more use until my final breath. I am fighting abuse against my level 3 sister with autism in her group home but I slipped through the cracks, our mother has mental illness and her and my guardians hated me and kept me from getting help. My lucky break is...I am smart. It's served me well, although I've seen too much. True innocence is what few people have but often those with autism are easy for me to talk to because they still maintain a level of this. True heaven within.
"imagine being a female with autism"? it sounds like bliss.
So true. Idk how I'm going to make it through this life
My ex would randomly hum/sing. I’m quite sure she was what’s known as quiet bpd. I actually mostly enjoyed my time with her because she wouldn’t rare at me like my ex wife would. I kind of liked her quirks. Best of luck to you it can be hard being “different” but I pray we all can find people that love and support us. I’m currently in social withdrawal and working through loneliness as he mentioned in the video.
@Dr. Von’s Life Investing I think its interesting you are working 'through" but not trying to 'fix' it. We are who we are and sometimes working with what we have may make our days that much bearable at least for me because the isolation and inability to interact is isolating. Best.
@@snowcloudshinobi it’s not trust me, any one with autism suffers some way
I've been pinballing back and forth between massive amounts of anxiety and soul crushing depression. Really sucks.
I don't have anything else to add besides this and the thanks for reading thru this article.
**hugs** I'm with you. Definitely not fun.
I highly recommend exercise. It usually always gets me out of
My depressive slump
If only schools actually educated those without autism about autism.... 😞
Thank you for the information. All four of my kids are on the spectrum, and it was exciting and enlightening. Many blessings, sir.
Yeah I don’t see how any kid growing up w/autism doesn’t suffer from depression and anxiety . Plus for some of us - we weren’t even aware of autism until our 20s so that didn’t help . What’s worse is fixing these two issues is not easy and medication just adds additional side effects. Daily exercise is a must
I cured my depression, and I can say that depression is not caused by autism, it's caused by being less successful than the average person in society.
When you work your ass off for a few years and get a girlfriend and a very high paying job, it's impossible to feel depressed with Asperger's syndrome.
Living with Aspergers is like playing life on Ultra Hard mode, but once you beat it and reach the top, it's the most rewarding feeling ever, trust me.
And it also results in you being more disciplined than 99% of the population, because 99% of the population doesn't have any big weights to train their discipline muscle.
Aaron, if you're really serious about finding love & a partner in life; seek out someone who is also autistic. There must be online groups that could assist with this. Best of wishes to you and your endeavors with finding love! 💗
there aren't groups for that and women on the spectrum tend to want to date neurotypical men.
I imagine it’s pretty difficult to find autistic women . It would help to have someone that is aware of your disorder though
@@snowcloudshinobi My bad, I wasn't aware.
@スノー I actually find it's the opposite. Neurodivergent people and especially people on the spectrum generally have a natural attraction to one another because we have similarities. People with ASD relate to one another on a level that neurotypicals don't.
@@snowcloudshinobi Wrong. Why on earth would we want to date a man that doesn't understand?
I wish you all the best Aaron, James from Canada 🇨🇦
Ive noticed there are quite a number of autistic couples out there.. Struggling with different issues but able to come together and understand each other and work out each others day to day problems and anxieties.
Thank you so much for sharing the article Aaron! Continue taking care of yourself and be well!
Really enjoyed your Livestream today. I'm on a break from loading trucks, but putting this in my history to watch after work. I feel like the reason I've failed to have normal connections as an adult greatly stems from my disconnect from other children as a child.
Growing up i always thought I was normal but just really shy. That's what my mom would say, "oh he's just shy" when i wouldn't want to talk or interact socially. I've never had any really close friendships or relationships. It wasn't until my late 20's that I realized I have aspergers. It's helped me understand myself better and has given answers to why my life experience have been what they are. However I don't want the diagnosis of autism to become a crutch or an excuse. That's an easy trap to fall into. We can't let it define who we are as a person.
How did u realize you have aspergere
Hi Aaron! Thank you for your channel ! Can I ask if you had any therapies as a child (after diagnosis)?
(Your channel is amazing; you’ll see faster traction if you upload more long form videos at least twice a week! )
Loved hearing you share this article! I could listen to you read articles like this all day and I’m bot joking. You’ve got such a calming voice, definitely goes well with this type of content!
Keep the videos coming Aaron 🤙
"The happiness in your life is determined by the quality of your thoughts" if you were present with your thoughts you'd realise really quickly how much your past is dictating your present and future. Learning proper mindless meditation would do you alot of good sir, focus and find new ways to have the life you want instead of expressing why you think you don't. The difference in mindset alone will attract the right people in your life. Don't chase and you will find is the key.
tldr: just have positive thoughts bro
Great video. This kind of content is why I am here. Great work Aaron
Hi Aaron! I keep missing your live streams, not happy about that at all. Oh well, it's nice to see you again on your channel. Been reading these comments here, it always amazes me how people want to give advice on something they haven't experienced themselves. I've never been autistic, but I know people who are...if people would just take the time to get to know someone before labeling them as this or that, it would be a much better world for sure. I have very few "friends" and can relate to how you feel at times...most people can't understand someone that doesn't "fit their pattern" of what people should be...each person is an individual, not good or bad, just an individual with their own personality. I find that I stay home, when I know most people will be out...and go out when most people will be in, if that makes any sense. It's hard to explain, I just find it more peaceful NOT to be around most people. I enjoy your videos and can relate to a lot of what you say on those videos too. Keep making the videos Aaron, and know there are people out there that want to know what you have to say, I'm one of those people who want to know what you have to say...have a good week ahead, one day at a time. Was able to catch the last 5-10 minutes of your live stream after all! 🤗
So good to see im not a lone Alien ^^ Just recent i discoverd the stoic principals for life, which are really helpful to live my life happier. I recommend :)
nice to see you have a profile pic for thw channel, looks dope!
Yeah, finally got around to that, lol. Thanks!
I suspect it is harder for autistic men than autistic women in the realm of finding a romantic partner. But I am an autistic woman and I struggle in the same way. Men always say it’s because women have “too high” standards, but my standards are not unrealistic (I actually like short men, for example). Men just aren’t interested in me because at first glance I seem like a robot. I don’t know how to seem open or express interest in men I do like. I’m 24 and never had any romantic experience, never held anyone’s hand. Only two boys have expressed interest in me. One had a girlfriend and was mentally disabled, the other gave me a drawing of himself committing suicide. I do have some standards! I did go on one date from online dating, and we seemed to hit it off online, but once the guy met me in person he ghosted me.
All this stuff about autistic people having it worse than anyone including people with other types of developmental issues... I've always known it. I've learned to deal with it so long ago I don't even bother talking about it anymore.
Hey Aaron, thanks for uploading. Enjoy your Sunday!
Im autistic, and truck driver as well. I have no close friends and I live alone, only ever had short romantic relationships with women. They quickly find I am autistic and lose all interest. 38 yrs old
Was waiting to hear from you again!
Understanding why will help you cope.
Light and love ❤️
Can you describe the women you are looking for.
What traits would she have to make you happy?
I’m not on the spectrum but due to extreme crappy childhood I struggle At starting and maintaining relationships because of abuse and girls bullying me in school. Add insult to injury I’m average at best looking
Yep been there myself. I am autistic.
Hey man how are you growing your channel so fast ive been trying to get 1,000 for 5 years!
We can learn anything man. We have to stop worrying about them finding us out.
Have you thought about switching to a career that doesn't involve any face-to-face interaction? I'm a research scientist but I taught myself to day trade by taking classes online and I'm considering doing it full-time. I like research but I can't take the interactions anymore. You're too smart to be driving a truck anyway. I used to do jobs like that and I was miserable. I've found I can't really change myself, but I CAN change my environment.
reducing personal interaction doesn't sound like solution but more like a way to accerbate a difficult situation. those of us on the spectrum need to learn ways to be more at ease with who we are and try to maintain contact with real world people and not hide away. it may not always be comfortable, but that's life in a nutshell.
@@redshoesgirl It's not hiding. It's just removing the part of your life where you're interacting with people you don't want to, in situations you don't want to be in, where you're not free to be yourself, because it's part of your job. I'm all about social interactions that I choose, as in friends, hobbies, family, etc.
if you learned how to trade by taking a course good luck staying consistent for long-term. and if you don't backtest your own models, forget about it
@@redshoesgirl agree. There have been times in my life where I reduced the social interaction greatly thinking it would help improve my life. Welll it didn’t and I found myself deteriorating . I wish just reducing social Interaction fixed this problem but it doesn’t
@@mcchickenmuhchickenyep, I get the vibe from him and many others in his situation. They reduce most face to face social interaction and are left to talking to people online casually. This does not help things . I see younger people with social issues and I cringe when they explain how they spend almost all of their time online. Young people with social issues need to socialize and how to read people and improve social skills
I've seen several articles mention that autistic men do awful in the dating market (while women seem to do okay). Not that you'd need such articles, because it feels like common sense to me.
From the perspective of someone who isnt autistic:
Its AWKWARD. When someone is awkward in an interaction, it makes the situation weird and the non autistic person has to know why you're acting weird. We take it as if you have a problem with us or the situation and its natural to want to know why someone is acting "off". Being socially awkward can come off this way to someone who isnt socially awkward. Im not autistic, but I hate prolonged eye contact, so I kind of get some of that.
being Austistic is far easier when you are Gay, BUT it's still not idea... i myself (autistic gay male) get bashed & judged a lot by other men because of my strange sense of style & my interests & boundaries. but still... im VERY GLAD i don't have to try to impress women at all, however, a lot of girls i met always want to be friends with me but i think that's just because they know im a fruit but i appreciate it :)
And it’s all a massive mess when you’re like me: LGBTQ, autism spectrum, ADHD, hypothyroid disease, small intestinal bacterial overgrowth, numerous chemical absorption and digestion issues. Bad health is certainly a cross to bear, with none of them standing out above the others.
Are you familiar with the writings and videos of Temple Grandin? Worth looking into.
I met her in person in 2007!
@@aaronsjournal139 What was she like in person?
I've only ever found it easy to form relationships with women who are also on the spectrum. There is a common understanding there
Still watch your Vlogs and podcasts and I really feel for you in that a lot of what is happened to you happened to me as well. It just feels like you’re the target for everything.
Growing up, where are you pretty much the target for everything? Like, did a lot of kids want to shoot you with spit wads or throw things at you?
And did you ever get volunteered to sit in a dunking machine for a fundraiser? that one can be humiliating.
If you could roll back the clock to 9 years old, is there anything you would have done different or wished your parents had done?
That is a great question that I’ve wondered about . Looking back I wish my parents were more aware of the social issues I was having . I tried to blend in as best I could and was good at sports so this helped me hide my issues a bit better. That said, even if you seek help early - what treatment
Options are there aside from just learning social skills and how to cope with this disorder?
@@brianmeen2158 Yeah I don't know. I was thinking something like an after school group with other kids with autism. Maybe some genuine connections could have formed through something like that.
Not meeting my stepdad is what I would pick.
I wish they would've taken my severe anxiety seriously and had me mentally checked out for my complete lack of social skills instead of pushing this "god" sht over and over
Is there anyway you can up your energy levels? Even faking it. Will help you with relationships. I mean that with nothing but love for you and a sincere desire for you to be happy.
Feels like so much effort just to end up with most people you meet not caring about you or being important to your life at all
The link to the article wouldn't post.. but basically as women delay childbirth later and later the chances of having an autistic child increase, ironically increasing the future problem
Ahhh I don’t know anyone that has any high quality Friends past school, so that seems like a lie to me.
It’s definitely not a lie. Most people I know have at least 1 good friend .
I can't help but feel like a lot of these issues are... normal? I would say a lot of ppl could relate to all this autistic or not. I certainly can. I hope im not autistic 😳
I made it to the end and I feel I should share that I also have depression and anxiety. But wait there’s more 😂 a little ocd plus RA and fibromyalgia 🙃🫠
I sound far worse than I am but I struggle like everyone. I just use humor to lighten everyone up. I’m always embarrassed no matter where I go and people have openly asked me if I’m playing stupid. Let’s not go into all the names I was called.
I just try and remember I’m here today and I deserve to be here like anyone else. Please remember you do too! Well wishes and you just let me go with you with you and I’ll talk to this man in the warehouse! Let him try then!