How to Stop Depending on Others for Your Happiness (Part 1)
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ค. 2020
- Are you depending on others for your happiness? Ready to create it for yourself? - Watch this video RIGHT NOW to FREE YOURSELF*****
Are you exhausted being at the mercy of someone else's happiness? Is codependency unstable and not providing you with peace? In this video Dr Marina Oster from www.carryjoyinside.com/ will show you effective tools to liberate yourself and start sourcing happiness from within.
What else is working for you? Post in the comments below 👇
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Disclaimer:
All video information is advice only and meant to help you identify the areas in your life that may need focused attention. However, coaching is not professional mental health care or medical care. Marina Oster is not a medical doctor. If you feel psychologically stressed to the point that it is interfering with your ability to function, please have the courage to seek the help you need in the form of a medical professional. The advice, guidance, and principles outlined in all content produced by Dr Marina Oster, carryjoyinside, and other encompassed entities are not guaranteed to be appropriate for your unique situation or business.
As per and unless otherwise permitted under the United States Copyright Act, no part of the content of this video or any video published under Dr Marina Oster, Carryjoyinside and other encompassed entities, shall be stored, copied, recreated, republished, or transported. Prior express written permission by Dr Marina Oster is required for any use of this video not permitted under the United States Copyright Act.
I'm at the crying stage lol. Trying to convince myself, the way you try to convince a friend they deserve love, that they deserve better, when they've been told their whole life that love was only meant for others. Thank you for this video!
I'm surprised this doesn't have many likes and comments- this is exactly what I needed right now, thank you so much. I will be doing these!
I am so happy to hear that Molk. With the world changed so much, our relationship with ourselves and others have been tested and a reassessment and recalibration is necessary. This really is a time for inner work. May your path be full of light.
Not a lot of people are ready to except something about them isn’t right. I was one of those people. Today marks the journey of working on myself
until a few days ago I was completely dependent on a girl. than she started to be distant and put me aside. i felt really bad but that made me realize that I mustn't base my happiness on other people. i started take more care of myself and love myself more. i am enough. thank you Marina for reminding me
Well are you happy now?
@@MCrystalMaidenn I almost am. my life is going better and better
@@mattiamanzetti4419 I'm happy to hear that ^^
@@mattiamanzetti4419 what did you do to improve yourself and forget her
@@developermindset2871 i stopped trying to constantly get her attention (it hasn't been easy because i was used to that) and i began to live my own life. also, i started doing mindfulness meditation and devoting more time to myself
I jump from one relationship to another to find happiness. Guess what i found? Pain lol. I don't wanna blame myself for all the horrible stuff i've been going through but I need to change this behavior. One step at a time.
Video starts at 06:29
1. Write ''I am enough'' and tape it on a wall
2. Start a journal where you write what things you do that make you happy aka your hobbies
3. Look in a mirror and say ''I love you, you are beautiful/powerful/strong/lovable''
took me almost 50 years, but I'm gettin' there. thanks!
Yes echopathy, isn’t it amazing? Bravo for shifting and evolving. Our world reflects back to us the agreements we have made... The beauty is that these are simply agreements but not actual truths. The truth is that you are worthy and magnificent. And therefore you have the sovereignty to revoke old agreements and create new ones to which you are now aligned.
I was feeling overwhelmed.. this video calmed me down. I will practice this. Thank you so much.
I've learnt that you must never rely or depends on others for help or happiness its a selfish world we live in and most people only think of their own needs.
It's so hard, because I suffer with borderline personality disorder. I think this actually helps more than anything I have looked up to help with that.
I am only a child yet i am severly depressed, I have no one to talk to and rely on my friends more then my family. My family used to tell me to shut up over the death of my dog which led to me bottling up my tears and I started crying silently, my family also have favoritism and I am at the bottom of the barrel. If I know no one would commit over me commiting I would have commited already. This video helps alot
Wow, just wow. This video is my first step into growing myself as a person who was so used to being dependent and repressive and this is helping to remind myself that I am enough. Thank you
ONE of the best comments on TH-cam
I know my worth but I still want a connection with someone. I’ve been single for 10 years.
I'm pleased to say that I've created my own happiness and financial stability and I haven't got to thank anyone,would hate for someone to say if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be where I'm at.
I love your ornaments on the fireplace mantle. Also you're earrings, you obviously have an eye for design, need an apartment / house tour! Thank you for this video, I got rid of my circle of friends, so I am now lonely. I was on my smart phone all day so I got rid of that, so now I don't have the all day distractions of podcasts, reels and instagram. The silence is now deafening. I hope I can find ways to feel fulfilled and meaningful connections. People seem dis interested, take ages to reply or simply don't bother. I think the whole world just wants to stay homes on their phones.
Happy you are clearing space for your dreams to come to you. Practice listening to Nature. Get a hammock or simply a chair on your balcony, go outside and listen... insight and beauty is seen and heard in the silence among the manifested thoughts of God
Thank you for your lovely reply : ) I do feel better when I am outside. I live one minute from the beach and I do need to sit by the water more. Since getting rid of my phone I am getting outside more. I was praying but stopped, will start conversing with God again @@DrMarinaOster 🙏
@@katcampbell9213wishing you the best ❤ I’m also trying to fix the problem this video talks about and deleted social media like you. Haven’t cut off my friends but I am distancing myself a lot so I can learn how to make myself happy
Well said mam believe that ur part of Ocean not a drop
I want to study psychology when I get older so I can be my own therapist and help others
Thank you so much ❤ I'm gng to do all these things starting tomorrow. No more waiting for happiness from others
Intentionally search for something like this cos I have become so miserable trying to seek happiness and validation from people who's only selfish and greedy 🤧. Yes, people change 😶,I gotta focus on myself. I gotta regain self-worth 🤧
Thankyou ❤️
Wow this is fantastic and something I definitely struggle with. I suspect that the root of these issues come from the death of my lovely father when I was just 15. A lot of losses followed (our family home, moving areas) and lots of change throughout my late teens and 20’s.
Even though I now I have a lovely family of my own I’ve been hurt a few times by friends over the years and have changed groups of friends a few times. I feel the lack of those ‘best friends’ to prop me up and provide support and at times feel like a child who needs someone to nurture me (when I have my own young children!!) I think I really need to learn to rely on myself more and trust myself more rather than always looking to others to make me feel better ❤
It’s not that I am not enough. It’s that I’ve been told I am too much..
Thank you! 🙏🏽 Did the mirror thing and cried aswell! Will try doing this excercises a couple times a week from now on!
Hey Marina, thank you so much for this video. Your channel is so warm and welcoming. The methods you provide are simple yet they do so much wonder for the soul.
Much needed video
Hey Marina! Glad to see another video from you. Your last one was 3 weeks ago, hope everything is okay in your life :)
This is such a strong message! People believe that we need more money, more fame, more stuff, more validation to be happy. But everything above our basic needs is just not viable and healthy, unless we have the right mental state.
I always believed that we are already perfect circles. Not half circle looking for someone to make us whole. But perfect and making each other even more perfect :D
I loved what you said that you are your own universe. Sitting down and searching for that strength within should be taught in schools :) Along with self empowerment
Its not ridiculous. It is amazing!
Sorry for this vent but I need to write it out somewhere
I hate that I don’t love myself enough and look for people to love me instead. And when that person doesn’t love me anymore, or worse hates me, i feel like a big part of me is gone. The one that made me love myself, the one that made me happy. I always focus on making myself likeable to others and I strive for being liked by everyone.
Insightful & helpful! Thank you Ma'am
Thank you for this!🙏🏼
Thank you very much for those powerful words !
I think this is the one i rialize even before watching this vedio..SELF LOVE..
i needed this. thank you so much.
Thank you so much Marina, for making this video. I almost cried when you were teaching the mirror technique..
In the beginning of this video i realized so many things in my life. Thank you
Thank you Dr. for this Video.
Bursting in tears right now.
I will do your tips starting today.
Hello! So,i did the mirror thing and i started crying lol....I finally realise how bad i have been feeling recently...and it kinda help me to feel a lil better.thank you so much for the tip💗i
Thank you for this video! :)
Thank you, Dr. This has helped me a lot.
Hi Doctor, today I will start to watch all your videos. I'm trying to survive on my own depression. Thanks for the videos. Keep helping people like me. God bless
I love to learn to play the piano. I don't know how to start so I started learning it alone my way. I am enough as you said and voila it is more satisfying and more fun to learn it alone. I am not kidding.
I really needed this thank you.
You are wonderful,calm and likeable.Your suggestions are simple but highly rewarding .Besides,you are strikingly beautiful.My greetings from Morocco.
I’m sick of it, I’m letting people control in ways I can’t understand
They take advantage of me and on my free time, I spend it helping others, I never even get time to myself without others asking my for their BS please help:( it’s getting out of hand and I want to stop but I feel like I cant
Thanks🥰 I really appreciate you and this video🥰
Life changing video!! Thank you do much
Thank you for making this video keep going
Love this
You are such a loveable human being and very relaxing. I did have this problem then I decided to watch something about it and you came the first. I do agree with you but in case of team work we need others to join us and help us throughout our work. For instance, for setting up a company or an English academy you need some people. But I got this idea from you that you are trying to instill self-confident and self-love in us which I love. By the way, I am really proactive person and every single moment of my life I want to do sth non stop and that is making my life really hard and I am constantly looking for people to talk with to fill my time
This video is extremely good and I look this content because I needed, but this video is literally changing my life right now. It made me aware of emotions or patrons that I didn’t even know the names. THANK YOU❤
Thank you! You have helped me very much i will share this video with my friends.
Thank You Becks s, Health & Happiness are often tied to being your own hero - becoming aware of our patterns and triggers and having the courage to change our behavior. I salute you and honor your commitment to yourself. Bravo!
Thanks a lot!
Thanks you so much for this 🥰
Wow. That was a great video!
First of all i want to thanks u a lot, i didn't try the exercices yet omw n ngl the mirror part even tho i tried it makes me cry. This is so beautiful coz back then all i can see n say to myself bc of my depression was horrible things. Anyways, wish u all of u guys to find ur true self n be happy by ur own.👐
Thank you Doctor Oster for taking the time to make this video. I have recently got dumped from a 5 years relationship, and I realize I never cared about myself and never did amything for my own satisfaction. Your words and advice really help me. Greetings from South America!
Dear Kenny, this change in your life was a blessing in disguise- it means that you are ready to honor your worthiness. And then the external world will match your new evolved state of being.
@@DrMarinaOster thank you for your response and support. We really don't know each other, but you really helped me and should feel proud of yourself. Wish the best for you
Vibrant health & profound happiness to you Kenny. Thank you.
Thank you so much
Thank you so much 🙏🏽♥️
Thank you ❤
Excellent message tnq👌
Thank you❤❤❤
God never gives us more than we can handle 🙏 I hope we all find peace with ourselves. Good luck ❤️
i was emotionally dependent on this one person because of how they understood me and my emotions better than i did myself which was crazy if u think about it but like i started to think that if this one person gave me comfort, attention, validation etc i would immediately be happy. i just really didn’t know how to take care of my emotional well-being so i relied on this individual to make me happy. big mistake ngl, ‘cause people don’t really give u that emotional fulfilment that u need when you’re so empty and deprived from self-love. even when i got their approval, i was happy for a while until all those negative emotions came back to me. it was a never ending toxic cycle.started to realise the problem was within me, only i was capable of loving myself and understanding my emotions so i let go
Progress is in motion thank you
wonderful to hear 🙏
I need this!
Excellent message Dr. Oster. I’m currently working with a life coach, which has been very helpful.
This helped me a lot! Thanks
You very welcome Kiki. Wishing you profound happiness and ever growing love towards yourself and wonder at all of the beauty that you truly are.
I luv ❤ you. You look so genuine
This is the answer to alot
Thank you so very much x👩❤️💋👩x
This is useful.
Thank you.
I don’t rely on others to be the light because I don’t rely on others for my happiness. The more self-reliant I am, the better i feel about myself.
After my partner of 9 years ended things, partly because of the pressure of me always relying on him I have got myself in a situation where I'm trying to find a home for that reliance. Someone from my past has come back into my life and allowed me to put all of that into him and it's so incredibly unhealthy. This is the first step on my journey of breaking out of this horrible cycle. It's scary but needs to be done.
I am not saying you are wrong I know you are telling is absolutely true and scientific but no matter how many times I tell myself that in front of the mirror it never gets through me I never actually feel it's like they are empty words and there is always someone better than me somewhere. I cannot even impress the person that I work really hard to impress
Marko you have to give yourself permission to be vulnerable. You have to look yourself in the eye when you say those sacred words. Forget about others, the noise will always be there to distract us.
thank you
❤️😍🥰 fabulous 🥰😍❤️
Tbf these tips, while amazing, are more for self love and less for how to make yourself happy.
Literally felt a break through at 11:00
This video is extremely helpful. Can you do more videos on this topic?
Hi Bianca, I just finished filming part II of this video. Out very soon - subscribe to be the first to get notified 🚀
I really liked this video and agree with you 100%. My only question is then, is why do so many psychologists tell people that they need friendships and other close relationships with people in order to be happy?
Desert ghost, choose to be the center of your own universe. When we realize our magnificence and therefore worthiness, we feel complete from within and enter into any relationship from a place of power and choice to enrich our life.
thanks mam
your very welcome
My wife left me & all think about her & obsessed on her coming back.. I’m going crazy! Literally I’m mentally fatigued.
Dr. Marina,
I’m curious. After watching this video I realize I have not been giving myself love enough. My own parents would call me awful names and guilt trip me growing up (they would do a lot more than just this). I may not be perfect but I know deep down that the offensive names they call me even today are not true. They use this as an excuse to not introduce me to people I know I would work well with. Like everything, my relationship with my parents (or anyone in general) is separate from my relationship with everyone else.
When faced with parents who keep making me feel bad about myself and being bothered about the negative and untrue things they think and label of me to be, what is your advice for this? Thank you. You are a shining light for all of humanity.
Sincerely,
Thomas McGuigan
it’s hard saying no to suicide
Right but applying it is really really hard seems impossible specially in relationship love
I hope youre doing okay ❤️
toxic relationships + this video= me
❤❤
Dear dr marina,
I'm in this problem.. I depend on one of my bestfriends attention and care.. and i get frustrated when i feel that im not treated equally .. and that is mentally damaging me i get angry and i keep overreacting and overthinking about small stuff that kind of dont matter but to me they do.. like seeing her less often or walking by my house and not checking up on me although we didnt see each other for a while.. although the person that I'm talking about does love me and i don't know..
Hope you reply..
I am the same but with my family. I need to learn not to depend my happiness onto others
I really need help 😔
Im going to listen to you, will you come back to youtube 💕✨🔥
I am here because I just found out that I'm an Enneagram 2, which relies entirely on outside sources for happiness. This isn't good, so I'm here.
I pity myself that I have to watch this
You want us to create our very own reality?
Do you know how crazy that sounds?
Isn't that why they invented straight-jackets?
if you are here to tell me still its not sustainable lel
youtube is becoming dangerous. im getting therapy online :)
Feel like she is lying but ok
Sorry but this is not enough. Affirmations is good but it is not enough. You need to give more constructive directions in hell for someone who doesn’t believe in themselves, to start believing in themselves.
This video was much needed. Thank you 🩷 please if you can, continue videos like this and more
thank you
it’s hard saying no to suicide
Fr