The Bitter-Sweetness Of Being A Single Parent │ Chubeka Nongwana

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ความคิดเห็น • 60

  • @siphokaziluzipho4197
    @siphokaziluzipho4197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    I am a single mom, children always longs for the dad, absent or present. It can be irritating for the mom, but we need to be compassionate towards the kids.

  • @LadyLebza
    @LadyLebza ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Ursula has been shocked the entire episode and Chubeka was comfortably moving at 10 sgaxas per minute😂😂

    • @LadyLebza
      @LadyLebza ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Chubeka provided the duality of not wanting to be a parent sometimes but seeing the value in parenthood and the current situation. I wish more women could vocalise that and that there would be less judgement.

    • @zammyzee8073
      @zammyzee8073 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes!!!!

    • @bongabotha8211
      @bongabotha8211 ปีที่แล้ว

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @miss.n6582
      @miss.n6582 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Sigh! These are some of the many reasons that instill so much fear for me to NOT desire to be a parent.
      Growing up with both loving parents. Now for one to have the possibility of being a single parent because some might decide not to be involved💔 haike. It would shatter me into pieces.
      Sending love, strength in abundance and God's grace to every single parent.
      It is easy for an outside to assume that it is easy, or it was a choice, pride etc... No child deserves this I have seen how it also continues to affect the same child into adulthood. Yhuu! Kuningi.
      Let's extend grace to each other bakithi. We do not need to know the full story. Be Kind.

    • @zee484
      @zee484 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂😂😂😂😂

  • @leratomakwela1077
    @leratomakwela1077 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I love your content and I think you’d make a great host on Kaya FM. You fit their conversational style and etiquette ❤️

  • @esthermotsepe5472
    @esthermotsepe5472 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I was never ready from the second she said 2 months pregnant 😢 we go through the most, but Chubeka, you're a star

  • @zammyzee8073
    @zammyzee8073 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    The self sabotaging baby daddy is the pits 😫🤞🏾 people would say that I’m being too nice and understanding because I have never sued for maintenance but my peace of mind comes first. At times I would be sad because I felt responsible for not choosing the right father but I didn’t choose motherhood either, I was just not strong enough to abort. Overall though, my son keeps me going because nna personally I have 0 grit bandla😂.

    • @siphokaziluzipho4197
      @siphokaziluzipho4197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I love my child, and he has a big role to play in our family. His dad was there throughout the pregnancy. He left when we both started working. I do feel guilty for my child, I didn't choose the best dad for my child. You could never understand the guilt.

  • @sammysiphoBoo
    @sammysiphoBoo ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Great guest! I love how she shares the reality of the matter, the highs and the lows. Very honest. Love her.

  • @katlehosello1192
    @katlehosello1192 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The facial expression from 14:18 sent me!! I love these conversation! Obsessed with this channel.

  • @MmakgoshiLM
    @MmakgoshiLM 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Being the parent that stayed/stays is a level of difficulty that gives me chest pains every now and again...I can't believe a heart is capable of breaking like this, so many times.😔

    • @karenmabasa6200
      @karenmabasa6200 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yoh! Tell me about it

  • @QaqambaStenge
    @QaqambaStenge ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Chubeka, you are so inspirational. I chopped onions, I laughed, I went through the emotions with you. The love you have for your daughter surpasses all understanding

  • @sibongilentshangase4398
    @sibongilentshangase4398 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Yep. That deadbeat dad's leaving their jobs just to avoid maintenance is very true.
    I know a few.... one of them is my uncle, he hasn't worked in +/- 18 years and he A L. O.T of kids.

  • @tategaps1407
    @tategaps1407 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Love and light to her would be nice to have her back. As a single mom with no help this gave me hope. 🔥🔥🔥

  • @foodworld8540
    @foodworld8540 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    That happens as well here in the UK...man stop working because they don't want to pay maintenance...its crazy

  • @Dimakatsomonaheng
    @Dimakatsomonaheng ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This was beautiful to watch, sending love and strength to the mom. A lot of us share a similar story.

  • @siphokaziluzipho4197
    @siphokaziluzipho4197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Ursula is so beautiful, looks like Zandie Ntlapo.

  • @leratolenyehelo2132
    @leratolenyehelo2132 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for this beautiful offering. Chubeka your honesty is liberating...big ups to you❤

  • @khwezimatu6768
    @khwezimatu6768 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You have the power of a goddess. Big ups CK. Sakthandi ❤️

  • @chumajola2511
    @chumajola2511 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Chubeka ❤ I am in awe of her soul and her spirit. May God bless her abundantly.

  • @jeansophia2092
    @jeansophia2092 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Ursula's face when she was counting number of kids the guy had 😂🤣😂🤣

    • @Lee_Nolo
      @Lee_Nolo 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @tinytomas3773
    @tinytomas3773 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love love it always make sure you raise someone who will never have to recover from child trauma because of you as a single mom...that's my goal...to have a functional human being who will be able to make informed decisions not only for herself but for the society we live in❤

  • @hubalefelicia1313
    @hubalefelicia1313 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Great conversation… I’m a single parent, lately I’ve been feeling so down, overwhelmed with the responsibilities… I do love my child but yes if I could do things differently I would have waited to have a child. Love your podcast ❤️❤️❤️

  • @tinytomas3773
    @tinytomas3773 ปีที่แล้ว

    Ursu 😂😂😂 u are so shocked with how much woman can handle😂❤❤❤

  • @happym3585
    @happym3585 ปีที่แล้ว

    May God bless Chubeka 🙏🏻

  • @neotrinitymoalusi1823
    @neotrinitymoalusi1823 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The hardest ❤ I'm not a parent yet I was raised by a single parent (divorced). like my dad lived in a different township but we saw him after years that's when we go to family events on his side of the family. Yes I do think of the possibility of being a single parent I sometimes feel maybe I'm being negative but it's the reality of life and no one hopes to be a single parent

  • @nozizwenuku8905
    @nozizwenuku8905 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have so many issues and so much anger from the rejection I experienced from my father worse yet comparing my relationship with him to the one he had with my siblings I have tons of unanswered questions and I'm never getting answers he has been late for 10 years. I'm well adjusted but definitely😭😭😭😭 not healed.

    • @naledimay7503
      @naledimay7503 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sending hugs to you sorry

  • @siphokaziluzipho4197
    @siphokaziluzipho4197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Someone needs to give Ursula water, she is so shocked and disturbed.

  • @dee5523
    @dee5523 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great advice 😍😍

  • @nondumisondhlovu9181
    @nondumisondhlovu9181 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great episode!

  • @lonwabosityebi412
    @lonwabosityebi412 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    For me, it's the single moms that protect these deadbeats. Why tell your child she IS loved by her dad when she clearly isn't 🤷🏾‍♀️. Moms need to speak their truth without the fear of being shamed as a bitter baby mama.
    Ps: The daughter of a deadbeat

    • @mphomotaung448
      @mphomotaung448 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It becomes tricky when the baby is young to the that brutal truth. I believe her telling her daughter is just trying to protect her from the fear of what rejection might do to her development. 😢😢😢

    • @Leboko80
      @Leboko80 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I feel the same way too.Why not tell tge truth from word go.i jate it when Moms are expected to let 5heir kids go to deadbeats so that they can see for themselves.Mmna ii allieanated nje.Andikjo bitter ndi wise.

    • @madikubudolo2082
      @madikubudolo2082 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I agree wholeheartedly. I'm an advocate of being direct and honest with the child about the reality of the situation. Of course in a sensitive manner. My mother was estranged from my father since my early childhood, and I found it more damaging that she withheld her experience of him from me bc she didn't want to be perceived or be a "bitter bad mouthing" single-mother. The impact of that is that it left me without guidance, and context. And I felt alone to inevitably discover my father's irresponsibility for myself. I would've felt much more protected by my mother had she let me in on the reality of her situation. It also would've given me standards much earlier on and an understanding that my father's irresponsibility was not okay.

  • @Project_Black_By_Zizi
    @Project_Black_By_Zizi ปีที่แล้ว +2

    These are the conversations we read need to have. Great topic choice ❤. Love the guest of choice. Thank you for sharing your story with us. All the best with the job hunting.

  • @miss.n6582
    @miss.n6582 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    😂😂 YAZI Ursula I am still waiting for you to confess gore you are Relo from Skwatta Kamp., as for Marianne wa Metro fm... Le yena let's add her there.
    Argh, I just love you ladies❤

  • @Uayandaaa
    @Uayandaaa 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Anticipation card was not the right way though. 😢

  • @bridgettemakgareetsa1248
    @bridgettemakgareetsa1248 ปีที่แล้ว

    The "father" conversation is the worst. It never stops, is continuous and it will always pop up from time to time.

  • @flowerlindz
    @flowerlindz 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Your boyfriend vanishing when you announce your pregnancy is disappointing but not surprising.

  • @NtombizonkeMehlomakulu
    @NtombizonkeMehlomakulu ปีที่แล้ว

    I think that is totally wrong, you can't lie to your child for the sake. I think we need to be realists and just state that, "your father is not in our lives, hopefully when he comes to his senses, then he'll see you".

  • @ruru6435
    @ruru6435 ปีที่แล้ว

    Wow

  • @flowerlindz
    @flowerlindz 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The boyfriend had how many babies?? oh MY GOSH😭

  • @annahshongwe
    @annahshongwe 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I know its a year after. Bonga is right about men resigning so they don't pay maintenance

  • @mamoketetsotetsi3306
    @mamoketetsotetsi3306 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Please also show the faces of other participants...Not cool to hear voices and not see their faces or reactions. Thanks