I keep reading about how families get destroyed by money when someone passes away. When my mother passed away, we divided everything, then my 8 brothers and sisters each gave me some of their money to help me out. More than the money, I am so blessed to come from a wonderful, caring family. We have so much fun when we get together.
I am truly blessed that I have a great family. I was the executor and my family was so patience and supportive. It took me 9 months to get everything settled and not one of my 5 siblings stressed me out. I have so much fun with my family also and love them so much. It amazes me how people fall out after death over something that doesn't belong to them. Greed is a powerful emotion.
Divorce and re-marriage is another case where updating beneficiaries is important. A friend and her hubby were married for 10 years before either one of them thought to check that out on his work-sponsored life insurance - the ex was still the beneficiary.
I wonder about gift taxes since it wasn't willed to them. If she gives them "their shares" then wouldn't that fall under a gift from her rather than an inheritance?
@@papasquat355 The money belong to the children. Don’t think about man’s court; you will stand before ALMIGHTY GOD. It would stealing. People forget, I forgot I had a saving bank account that I put money in for years. I just found it!!!!
No, Dave is completely wrong here. The kids got other assets but not the insurance policy. You don’t know what the intentions were. Also you can’t just sign over the money without tax implications.
I think he could be wrong though on the legal aspect. From her comment it sounds very much as though that policy money was NEVER meant for her. And I think they could prove that in court even if she wasn't already admitting it. I mean, they got the policy while the kids were minors and named the person who would be the obvious guardian of those kids if the parents died. That seems pretty straight forward to me unless she has evidence showing the intent changed.
@@slonikvasa it’s just my HR department’s policy that everyone resets all of their benefit info (not just health insurance) every single year. My husband doesn’t. Usually, anyone can reset their benefit allocations but people tend not to actually do it.
That's great! And people don't realize that having someone as a beneficiary on your pension plan can supersede the will. If you're divorced, do you want your ex to get your pension instead of your current husband getting it? I sat down with a estate lawyer and he brought up so many things that I wasn't aware of. He told me not to leave my jewelry to anyone in my will. In my state, all of it would have to be appraised and written detailed appraisals by a graduate gemologist is not inexpensive. I took a photo of each piece with alll the information about it and who I wanted it to go to . He suggested that I write a list of where I want those types of things to go in a letter, and have my executor put it in her safe deposit box. I also wrote my obituary which I update occasionally. I have the picture that I want used. I've told her where I want all my furniture to be donated after all my friends and neighbors to come in and take what they want. One of my friends wants all my books, one once all my photographs that I've taken in my career. All my railroad items go to a friend and she has a list of the charities that I want my money distributed to. She also has a list of all my passwords and all the important contacts in my phone have an Asterix behind them so she knows who to call. You can tell I like being prepared!
Right the answer is NO. It’s not an oversight. The kids got other assets including an IRA. Also you can’t just give it back. The assets must be distributed to the beneficiaries. That’s this man and his son. If he gives anyone the money it’s now a gift subject to gift tax. He would be reducing his lifetime unified gift tax credit which effects the taxability of his own estate.
@@ericeandcolol. They said in their question that they think it may have been an oversight. And, that makes the most sense based on the info given. She is not going to be at risk of hitting the lifetime gift tax cap in gifts to her nieces and nephews. No gift tax will be owed. They CAN "just give it" once they receive it from the insurance company. And then file a simple gift tax form documenting it. Greed.
Give the kids the money. The parents forgot to update the beneficiaries which could happen during a grieving period (his wife died). That said, check to make sure there are no tax implications for you and your son before giving it to them. If there are, you need to withhold that amount prior to dispensing it.
doesn't make sense why the guy didn't set up a trust for his kids makes no sense even while his wife was living ... it is his fault ... is SIL his mistress and the nephew in law his son ???? why on 🌎 would he have set his policy this way
@@KS-cl8brI won't pretend to know everything for certain. But I can only judge/assume the following from the info the sister-in-law/letter writer provided: 1. The policy was obtained when her deceased brother-in-law's children were minors. So this was probably years or decades ago. 2. The sister-in-law herself states that she believes that she and her son were made beneficiaries specifically because the children were minors. This makes sense and indicates that deep down she has strong doubts that the money is really meant for her. 3. Since her sister (the children's mother) who would have been the primary beneficiary is deceased, it is logical to assume that her brother-in-law may have put his sister-in-law and her son as secondary beneficiaries back then. Just in case BOTH the brother-in-law and his wife were to pass away, he assumed the sister-in-law and her older son would be responsible enough to use the money to help raise his children. The summary of my position is this. There is no legal requirement to give the children the money in this case. But there is a strong moral argument to do so in the spirit of good family relations. This is different from if the sister-in-law was given the money in a will. If that was the case, there would be no argument whatsoever to give the children a dime, as the deceased intentions would have been crystal clear!
You don’t know the parents forgot to update the policy. Your assuming. And you can’t just give them the money. There’s tax consequences. It would be considered a gift.
@@KS-cl8br I agree they should have used a trust. I'd put my money on there being a combination of ignorance (not knowing how to do it or wanting to learn), pushing it off until later (procrastinating it because 'there will be time later'), and not wanting to pay the cost to set up a trust. Some people (myself included) know they need to set up a trust and have not made the time for it yet. In that case they often will list family members as beneficiaries so they can act as a sort of informal executor until they get around to forming the trust. It's unfortunate the deceased parents apparently didn't communicate at all with OP what their wishes were. That would have helped a lot.
@@homesteadrevivalsSometimes it is an oversight. My uncle didn’t take his ex wife off of his life insurance policies for years after he remarried because he is lazy and absent minded.
The insurance company was not supposed to tell them who the beneficiaries are. As someone who works with estates we can only give people information they are supposed to know. Go back to the company and file a formal complaint. I would be curious to know how long ago they listed you as the beneficiary you can find that out with the insurance company.
My mom did a living trust and will. I was the trustee and executor. There was a clause in the will that basically said that if you contest the will, you will be cut out. I made copies of the will and highlighted that part for each family member. It stopped a lot of discussions. I was so happy she had that i there.
Give the kids the money. It was intended for their upkeep while minors, so the intent was for the kids. It's amazing how inheritance all of a sudden changes people to ask "am I right to do . . . " Well, if you have to ask that question, then you know the answer. Greed seems to take over "yeah, give it to the kids who lost their parents".
@@Faesharlyn As was noted, legally you're right. Still doesn't mean that the right thing to do, is give it to the kids. Not everything has to be driven by the law or courts, or a document. If the person who called in, has to ask what the "right" thing to do is, they already know but are trying to find a reason to defend keeping it.
@dwaynemauk566 but we don't know what's happened between then and now, how much OP was involved with sister's family (for example, did they all live together and a family unit or pool their resources? ) I don't have enough information from the family to make the call, but my takeaway from the letter is that the "children" are adults who should bring on a mediator since they feel they have a valid claim. Morally? Sure. With the information we have, split evenly among the kids seems fair unless their wills specifically exclude anyone but even if they do, what's the difference? It's just money at the end of the day.
Mistake-Oversite - you guys are right. I'm going through paperwork getting set to retire. I just reviewed my insurance and found that the beneficiary was my husbands brother and wife. They were to be the guardians of our kids if both of us died. Don't think that applies any longer since the kids are 36 and 32 yo. Changed that right away. But would have been a weird situation since that was not my intent.
Give the children their parents’ money. What they do with it is up to them. They have lost both parents the last thing they need is to battle with their aunt.
@lifesabeach746 Says who, you? It wasn’t YOUR money, and the people whose money is was said the OPPOSITE of what you’re demanding. Who the hell are you to demand that? That’s obscene and laughable.
@@TheSecondWitnesssays the person who was left the money. She said she thinks it’s an oversight because the children were minors when they got the policy. Your take is what’s obscene and laughable.
I was willed all my aunt owned. I called her kids to come get the gold and diamond rings, the boat, guns, nick nacks then i sold the house and shared it with them. I had sold or given all my stuff away when she called and said she was lonely. Would i come stay with her. She only lived 3 months before getting a bad case of pneumonia and I had pneumonia also but didn’t have to be hospitalized. She never came out. The cousins were in shock after the funeral but knew all I’d given up to come care for her in her one bedroom little house.
I could be completely wrong, but I think they were left the money to take care of the children while they were children. Then, as they became adults the policy just never got changed for whatever reason this is just my opinion I think the kids should now get the money I don’t care what their financial situation is. I don’t care if they would blow every penny of it, in my opinion it should be their money
Policy must have been drawn up by an idiot. All of these policies should be future proofed so that if the kids are adults when the parents die they are automatically the beneficiaries.
@@Weakeyedominantwell not if for some reason they wanted exactly what they indicated on the paperwork...that she and her son inherit the benefits from the life insurance. It's not like the kids were not named to get everything else...there was other money and assets that they left to the children. If they wanted the kids to have all of it then why would they have left everything else to the kids except for this?
I guarantee you she will keep it. She would have already given it to them if she felt the least bit uncomfortable about it. She’s looking for validation
but didn't she say that a lot of other things were left to the children in the Will? It sounds to me like it was done intentionally, perhaps to thank the recipients for everything they've done for her. A lawyer would have asked her why she didn't name them in the will.
@@brookelondon8029 Why would you leave a major life insurance policy to your brother/sister in law? You wouldn't. This was clearly a temporary situation while the kids were minors.
When my mom dies I am going to personally make sure my nephew/ her grandson gets something. This lad has nothing and she has asked me to take care of the money when she has gone…..he is my priority …no question!
A long time employee (30+ years) suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. His widow contacted benefits concerning his life insurance benefit. The beneficiary was his old girlfriend from decades earlier. I don’t know how it eventually worked out, but the beneficiary designation is ironclad.
This happens a lot in the military, when young and dumb people get married and divorced like changing underwear. I have known of an ex wife from ages ago coming in and scooping up everything, leaving the wife and kids of 30 years penniless.
I seriously doubt the man took out a life insurance policy to make sure his wife’s sister is taken care. He wasn’t your brother. You shared no blood with him. Give those kids that money which was clearly intended for them.
You forget that the policy also includes her son, who is, in fact, BIL's actual NEPHEW, which does in fact make him an actual relative. The fact that he named her son, and not his offspring on it, makes it very clear it's to go to her son if it doesn't go to her. His kids were never named on the policy because they were never meant to inherit it. One or more of them would have been named on the policy, if it was intended for them. He probably intended that it would help with his Nephew's education if it wasn't needed to care for his kids (which it ended up not being needed). SO if anything, she "should" use it for her son's benefit, but his offsprings were never intended to receive it, they have never had any legitimate claim to it, and basically they're just being greedy and disgusting.
@@justinmileman7863So this father decided when his kids were young, to CUT THEM OUT OF ANY INHERITANCE. Guess he must have known his kids would grow up to be jerks!!! Seriously, this will or whatever was made when the kids were minors. You can't leave money to minors only. You have to designate an adult. I agree that this man did not intend to cut out HIS KIDS so that he could take care of his sister-in-law and her son. What kind of father would do that?
One other thing, the son may have already been an adult when the beneficiary designation was made. It is likely the man named the son to receive money in case the aunt had died. You usually name two people to cover this situation. The fact that he named the son may simply be for this reason. Again, I ask you... this determination was made when his children were minors. In what universe would a man decide he wants to support his sister-in-law's son instead of his own?
Don't forget that, if it's legally YOUR money, usually life insurance isn't taxed, but GIFTS can be. And, as one poster pointed out, refusing the proceeds may trigger a contingent beneficiary issue. So, understand the issues before you act. If you want to GIVE the money, you may want to do it over several years to avoid gift taxes - something YOU pay. Also, don't too quickly determine you know someone else's intent. You right now are facing an unsolicited management issue. You may need the advice of a lawyer and maybe an accountant to get it right. The fact you're being pressured is the best reason in the world to move deliberately. And, since you may incur expense, and you didn't ask for this, it's fair for expenses to come out of the proceeds instead of your existing funds, regardless of what you decide.
Emailer didn't express any of this concern in the letter. Didn't even mention any wishes of the parents. I believe this person knows they inherited the money on accident and only wants to know, "Will I be an asshole if I kept this money for myself?"
Giving it slowly over several years to avoid paying gift tax is considered structuring and is illegal. Will you get cought? Probably not if you do it right and under the table, but it is criminal never the less.
My parents have sat me down and told me what me and my brother r getting when they pass. I told my parents to spend all their money have all the fun they can. They r in their 70s and worked so stinkin hard they need to have all the fun they still can. They don’t need to worry about me I can take care of myself as an adult. I appreciate them trying to help me out but I think that’s an old mentality. They have the responsibility to take care of me till I’m 18 and then be there for me afterwards but that’s all I need is their love.
As much as that is admirable, being the benficiary of parents whp are organized and know what they are doing. Even if theres not a penny in cash left there might be properties, trust, stocks whatever.
Sometimes, it gives parents more enjoyment when the next generation takes the gift. To see their kids and grandchildren enjoying it is the best enjoyment they can have. I feel the same for my sons and daughter.
A godly man leave inheritance for his children’s children. To spend all your money unnecessarily is immoral. Look at when people were godly they saved and built. Now they run up the debt and go to Europe.
Estates are not always as cut and dry and they make it sound. My in-laws had their estate and everyone agreed which brother would be the executor. Parents both passed and the brother didn't do what he was supposed to do. Took forever for my husband to finally get his portion because the brother would not be transparent in what he was doing to get all the assets straightened out. My husband finally had to hire his own lawyer to communicate with the estate lawyer to get things moving. Unfortunately he and his brother and sister have not spoken in a couple of years and they are all in their 60's and 70's. The estate lawyer agreed things were not right but sure wasn't in a hurry to put a stop to it. The longer it drug on the more money she got!
He's not kidding about things being different from state to state. I know that in North Carolina, without a will, everything goes to the surviving spouse, then kids, then parents, then siblings. Without a will in Texas, it's 50% to the spouse and 50% to the kids. Leaves the surviving spouse a big problem for a place to live when the kids want to sell the house that is partly theirs and the spouse can't afford to buy their portion.
No one has mentioned the ages of the "kids" who want the aunt and cousin to give them the money. Because the aunt and her son are the beneficiaries, I'd be more likely to think that they were made the beneficiaries on purpose. If it was just the aunt, I'd question if it was an oversight.
His letter said it was an over sight, so the kids was young, when it was taken out. The money was for the kids, so now they are adults the money should go to the kids hands.
I am so glad I saw this clip because this year I opened Roth IRA's and 529 accounts for my kids in addition to their regular savings accounts. I truly want to do my best to put any little bit I can away for their future. I will be looking at private life insurance next and certainly naming them as my beneficiaries. Finally, I need to create a living will. I will take care of all of it this year. Dave Ramsey is my financial guide at this time.
@@godfathaofyo best thing you can do is contribute to a 529 plan for your kids so they don't have student loans debt like most people calling Dave these days.
The letter writer knows this was an error. The deceased trusted her to help the bereaved children with the money when they were too young to handle it. So why would the deceased leave an insurance policy to the letter writer now that the children are older? Please do the honorable thing and give the children their money!
There us absolutely no way you could possibly know that. You don't know their lives or what circumstances were going on. If he left everything else, the other money, the house, the vehicles to the kids then maybe there was a reason he wished for his sister and nephew to have this money. We have no idea how much this money was, it might have only been $30,000 and maybe he wished for them to have it since the kids received everything else. There is just no way to know despite what you insist that _you know_ and that the _sister knows_ 😏
@gunnerarshavin2009 Who are you to override the stated wishes of those people’s money? Love how you believe you know everything and can read minds. You have NO CLUE what they intended. We only know what was written.
@mogamethanu I am wrong that there is no way she could know that for sure? You disagree with my statement that we have no idea what their life was or how much money the life insurance payout was? If that's what you think then you are also delusional! Because we have no way if knowing any if these things we cannot possibly say that we know what this person's intentions were and that one scenario can be just as likely as any other...and that was my whole point. I swear people don't use their brains.
Dave is right, that is what rich people do, but they also have the money to pay someone to fully manage that estate planning and take care of everything but the discussion and the signature
Don't leave a chaotic disaster for family to sort out and fix because a will and estate plan is "too expensive". Make it a priority and then keep up with it through life's changes. This is everyone's personal responsibility.
You just can’t “sign over” the money. If the aunt disclaims the policy, it goes to the contingent beneficiary if one exists. If no contingent, it goes into the estate and gets probated per the will. It probably would be better if the aunt takes the insurance payout and gifts it to nieces and nephews using annual gift exemptions or puts it into an irrevocable trust with the nieces and nephews as beneficiaries. The beneficiary aunt does NOT control the payout if she disclaims.
@marianne16897 he's saying she can gift it to them but she would either have to give it in tax exempt increments yearly or put it in a trust for them. if she just writes them a check they willl be taxed to hell on it.
@marianne16897 I mentioned that possibility and also to set up,a trust with it. It is her money, tax free. The problem is if her nieces and nephews don’t want her to have any control except to have the payout sent to them . That can’t happen unless they want to wait for probate.
@marianne16897lol...thats exactly what the OP just said...that rather than say she doesn't want the money go ahead and take it and then turn around and gift it to the kids if that's what she wishes to do. Did you not read what they said?😊
That’s a lot of trouble, expense, and tax implications for the aunt. Maybe she doesn’t want to be embroiled in all that drama in the coming years, arbiting requests from grown nieces and nephews and having to tiptoe around the tax code. Much easier to just disclaim the policy and let the chips for where they may.
I had a very close friend growing up who sadly passed away about ten years ago. We were nearly inseparable growing up and were close with each other's families. On her death a couple of years ago, his mother left his portion of the estate to me "in his honor." It wasn't giant, but neither family is particularly wealthy so it meant a bit more than might be expected. His brother and sister were not happy. Demanded that I just give the whole thing to them. The lesson here isn't the story. It's what Dave is talking about. It's not only necessary to have the paperwork but to make sure everyone understands what is coming.
I would follow the will as it is written. A lawyer should review it prior to any changes made as whatever is done will make some relative mad. I have seen a post distribution renegotiation of a will personally and it cost me in several ways - not worth what was left and lost.
She knows it’s not her money. She just wants a reason to keep it. It’s not your money and the kids aren’t being greedy for expecting you to do the right thing.
I own a property with my sister and share a bank account with her. I would never keep that money or her assets from her grown children or her young son.
I can think of some reasons why I would. Ask your sister now, does she think her children would benefit more from a lump sum of cash that they would use wisely or would they benefit more from you making those financial decisions on their behalf.
@cathy7824 That’s you. These other people obviously can make their own mind up and decided to give it to the people they chose. Its their money, not yours, and they can make their own decisions.
@@suen5006 Possibly - joint bank accounts and jointly owned property generally go directly to the other owner listed on the deed/account and isn't part of the willed property. It often depends on the laws where they live.
As long as everything is spelled out in each of your wills, you will becOK. Sit down with a lawyer and ask him what you need to do, if you haven't already. If you don't, you could be taken to court based on what they said they were promised.
I disowned most of my relatives due to the numerous times they stole money from my grandmother, yet if I got a million tomarrow my dirtbag aunt and her kids would expect me to divide it with them.
thats kinda the pain about estate planning and wills. each and everything thing must be updated.... SEPERATELY 1) the succession of the home 2) the cars 3) high value items 4) seperate buckets of cash like 401k, IRAs, saving accounts, 529s and so on 5) the life insurance policy 6) and so on each and every single account must be kept up to date. I've heard its a major pain in the butt for remarried folks, cuz what you establish (say in your 20s and 30s) but forgot about in your 40s to 60s or death would ALL BE WILLED TO THE FIRST WIFE and I guess that lineage. I'm not a lawyer so do your own reading and get professional advice on it. but I will say this. keep your docs up to date. for me, I'm planning on updating that mess at age 45, cuz thats when I'd be within 30 years of a term life policy to actually be useful. i mean, 45 plus 30 is 75, sooo i could be statically be dead by then. any sooner and I'll just use the money to pay off debts more aggressively like loans, credit cards, auto financing or my mortgage. owning a home in full is a better will to my lineage than some cash (okay not really but its better for ME)
Are you telling me that you believe your dearly departed sister and B.I.L didn't want their money to go to their kids. Your a mother as well what would you want if the shoe was on the other foot. These poor kids.😢
If that's what he wanted then why did he indicate that everything else, the other money, the house, the vehicles but yet not say this particular money should go to them as well? Why wouldn't he have just went ahead and left everything to them? Maybe he for some reason wished for her and her son to have that money. We don't know their lives or what all has occurred.
Maybe the brother just wanted to help his sister out for whatever reason. She did that he left it to and her son. We don't know how old her son is or if he has special needs. He probably thought his kids are grown up and don't need the money. He left them the savings and everything else.
Bottom line is the money belongs to this man and his son. He needs professional advice from an attorney and CPA before he transfers that money to anyone else anyway. Huge tax and possible legal implications.
As an estate planning attorney, I can tell you that Dave is 100% right. I end up generating more fees in remedial work than I do for preventive work. Keep up with your estate planning. Visit your attorney every 5 to 10 years at the very least.
John, they inherited a bunch of other assets, so your scenario of them wanting you to "protect" their adult children doesn't add up. If that was truly the case, they would have set up "protection" for the kids with all the other assets.
You can only "gift" a certain amount of money per year, per the IRS. You may want to "gift" the money each year (the max) until the funds are exhausted. Consult a estate attorney before any funds are distrubuted.
Our mother passed in 2022, found out her husband took her to his nephew, a financial advisor, and betrayed her. In her mind us kids would get the money in her investments. He also told us he wanted to buy her house, but bought a different house, didn't tell us, and stripped her house of everything valuable in secret. He then continued to go back to mom's house and steal more stuff. Mom had a will too, the first item was that she wasn't leaving him anything. He stoled her jewelry too. Jerk stood in front of us kids saying he didn't want anything from Mom's estate, not one penny was his words. He had already laid his plans, his daughter wore Mom's emerald earrings and ring to moms funeral knowing full well Mom wanted her jewlery to go to my niece. What a POS
Yeah...I always figure that if someone remarries, the kids gotta just waive bye bye to any expectation of an inheritance. There are so many stories of the 1st family getting screwed over.
@@divekatdreaming No people get screwed over because we act like children when it comes to money as a society. It's your responsibility to go talk to Mom or Dad and find out what you will inherit then act like an adult spend the money and get the inheritance put in trust just like rich people do. That way you WILL INDEED get the money when the parent dies. You go get a cheap or free lawyer and get it done. Long before ANY illness pops up. Make them put in it writing what you the child will get and what the new spouse will get and make sure it's separate!!! I have found that most of the time kids get screwed by step parents cause you kids insist on treating them like shit then they get you back when your parent dies. Kissing a little bit of ass goes a long way to making things easier on yourself in the stressful even if losing a parent. You never see this stuff happen when the kids decide to be friends with or even just tolerate the step-parent.
@@DiligoBarba I look at it differently. Inheritance is 100% the parents' responsibility. Sure, the kids should have open and productive conversations with their parents, but at the end of the day it is on the parents to actually fulfill their responsibilities. That includes using wills and trusts. I think we agree on the solution, more or less, but not on where the 'blame' lies.
Legally not. But from a moral perspective, if she believes it was in her name in case the kids were orphaned while minors (which she says she does) then keeping it would be wrong.
@Kivlor legally not what? _Legally_ it DOES belong to the sister and her son, the nephew. How can anyone attempt to argue against that when they are the ones listed as the beneficiaries on the policy?
My nephew screwed up the same way. His will named his wife BY NAME. After they divorced he never changed it, so now his ex got the inheritance and his daughter got left out in the cold.
If she was legitimate, he'd have been on the birth certificate, and her inheritance rights would have been legally ensured. So, he got divorced because he had an affair and produced the kid. Sucks to be her, but it is no sorrow that his affair bastard, who never should have been created in the first place, did not get what she did not deserve.
@@justinmileman7863I don't think so. What is on the will is what is legal. If the man left ALL of his worldly goods to his ex-wife, she gets everything. His daughter is out on the cold, but it has nothing to do with her being illegitimate. You can cut out legitimate relatives in a will. The court will do what you list on that will.
Their money? The mere fact that they think it's theirs is concerning. Do they need the money? Isn't the house car etc enough? Do you know it's an oversight? What did they tell you ?
Come on. Why would it be more likely to be for their aunt and cousin than for them? Especially if this dates back to them being minors. They're not entitled to anything, but this seems unlikely.
I think it's much more concerning that the caller "thinks it may have been an oversight" and is still questioning (along with you) if she should give it to them. Crazy.
Dave IS right DO NOT be lazy or a coward regarding estate planning. Note, he didn't say what you should or shouldn't do with your estate that is up to you. But he did say, ADDRESS IT before you die. And if you don't you are either lazy or a coward or both! [and of course change it as your circumstances change i.e. kids get older, etc.) And for those who do not like Dave I don't know how you could disagree with that, but I am sure you will find a way.
@@TheSecondWitness why are you being sarcastic? They offered a reasonable idea. If the insurance policy was modified after the kids became adults, it's clear the money was intended for the aunt. If it was never updated, it signals that it was for the kids. Why are you mad about a reasonable suggestion that provides clarity?
@CreamIceMs Don’t be ridiculous. She put “THEIR money” in bold. Wow, glad the 2 of you can read minds, and know where other peoples money should go - even AFTER that person put in writing where their money was to go 😂
@tonycrabtree3416 You’re the clown, along with anyone who tries to dictate other peoples money. Imagine the absolute gall you have to have to tell someone their money needs to be given to someone else. “THEIR” money? Haha try again. That’s pathetic.
The money should go to the kids, either directly or in a trust. No way I would keep the money, it would be like stealing from my nephews/nieces. This guy knows that money wasn't meant for him.
My grandmother lost one of her sons. He had 6 kids and a wife. Never updated his life insurance policy leaving it to his mother. She kept the money, bought her a new home and left his wife and kids to fend for themselves. The lesson here is GET A WILL and review it and beneficiaries ANNUALLY .
@@cyoohoosThat’s awful of your granny. Although I don’t think having a will give his wife the insurance money. That’s separate. Sounds like he forgot to update and didn’t anticipate his mother would be so cruel when he initially took out the policy.
@@cyoohoosthis is your uncle and his wife's fault for not ensuring this was corrected the moment they decided to try to make baby #1, let alone the 6th kid
Wow sounds like you you know exactly what someone (who you never met), wants to do with their money (that was never yours). Maybe they really meant to give the money to YOU! Hurry, call Dave and give him your routing and account numbers so he can tell those people where to send your money 😂
It’s your money! You and your oldest son are the legal beneficiaries. You can’t just sign it over without big tax implications. You should see an experienced estate attorney that is well versed in tax. Some attorneys are also CPA’s. Just make sure you stay informed and in control. Maybe I’d set up trusts for all the kids and remain executor. Hire professionals as needed and keep on top if results.
Shocking. In Norway You are guranteed a part of Your inheritance no matter what. However, Your relative is free to give anything and all away to whomever while they are alive.
Doesn’t it speak equal volumes that the children think they are entitled to money that was left to someone else? She’s asking Dave what his thoughts on it which means she is intent on doing it as the parents saw fit.
That's not what she is saying. She's saying that they have an inheritance coming later. And that she thinks that what was left to her son and her was an over sight. That's not the same thing as their only being one inheritance and it went to the non children. If that was the case I'm woth you. But that's not what she said.
@@ThrifterGuyshe thinks it’s an oversight because the parent should’ve changed the beneficiary when the kids were grown so they would’ve received the insurance money, but failed to do so as it is legally the Aunt doesn’t have to give them money and I can’t believe the kids are demanding she do so..them demanding the money would make me not want to give them a penny since they did receive a 401k and other things
@Shopgirl1 I agree other things including a house I believe. So they are already ungrateful. There's a reason why wealth doesn't normally last more than 3 generations.
Went through something like this with my sister regarding my father’s wishes for the dividing of his farm estate, my sister had left the farm at 18 and I stayed and worked alongside my father while starting and building my own farming business separate of my father.. when he passed unexpectedly it was revealed that his entire estate go to myself except for half of the value of his estate at the time my sister left the farm at 18 and that was a stated value on the will.. my sister tried arguing that my father hadn’t anticipated the growth in value his estate might gain and had he known he was dying he would have rewritten the will to reflect that.. Being the named executive of his estate I simply followed his instructions and told he she could blame him for not being more diligent in his thinking when she met up with him in the after life… Heirs & beneficiaries are not responsible for interpreting their parents writings or making moral judgments about them.. Sorry not sorry but death is just another business and sometimes isn’t fair..
My single godfather uncle died and left his money to me. I was 6. His brothers and sisters made such a stink that my dad divided the money and gave it to them. They rarely talked to us after that. I am sure because they were embarrassed and didn’t like seeing me.
I don’t think your father should have done that. If rather than being your father, he were a guardian ad litem appointed by the court to protect your interests, he would have no authority to give your gift away.
Make sure you leave a crystal clear will! My husband's aunts tried to take the amount from his grandparents that was meant for him and his disabled sister, ended up threatening to sue them, but didnt have to go that far since the will was clear and they were in the wrong.
That is so true some families hate each other because of money, the first time i told my eldest sister no because i realized she was taking my kindness for granted , i am now living to regret it because she stopped talking to me, our mom intervene but she still hardly speak to me only if its absolutely necessary
yep, grandfather passed half a decade ago and my aunt and grandma took everything and moved 4 states away. its sad what happens when money changes people but you cant let it control how you respond to selfish people
Don’t regret it. If your sister stopped talking to you because you said no to giving money, she is in the wrong, not you. She is too entitled to think she had right to your money. I would say good riddance. Wait until you have a spouse and she would still continue to beg, and then it would’ve become a huge problem for you.
I think it depends on the amount. If the aunt were to have tax consequences from gifting a lump sum, it may have to be distributed over several years, if at all.
This seems like the worst period. Even the market are now very unpredictable. Started investing recently when the market prices were a bit high,today I am more than 60% down!..
Don’t be confuse buying the dip in a bear market, with guaranteed future returns. Just because that company is down 60%+ from ATH does NOT make it a sound long-term investment. Make sure you’re investing in great companies. kudos to harriet alice
She's recognized as 'Mrs alice harriet. One of the finest portfolio managers in the field. She's widely recognized; you should take a look at her work.
This is why everyone needs to actually discuss their estate plan with family. Just waiting until you die for family to learn your wishes is beyond ridiculous.
As an insurance agent, this is 100% an oversight. People put reliable family members as beneficiaries and FULLY expect them to split it with the family evenly.
Then they should have allocated it accordingly in the policy via contingents. When my dad died, my mom made the necessary changes to policies within a month of his passing. My policies have my husband as primary and my kids as contingents. It’s up to the policy owner to handle their business. The idea of mind reading being a requirement is ridiculous
@@murderofcrows7738 and what is the right thing? Ignoring the instructions of he deceased and giving it to the kids because their having a fit? The parents made sure to leave everything else to the kids and had beneficiaries in order for retirement funds etc. This doesn’t seem like an error. They paid the policy every month so the probability they just forgot about it is next to zero
@@whosaidthat9265 The reason he didn't put the children as contingents is that the children were under 18 at the time. Many insurance carriers will not accept any beneficiaries under 18 (some carriers do). Unfortunately, the only time people remember to update beneficiaries is when someone passes away.
We made it very clear in our trust that anyone who challenges it gets nothing. We’ve talked to the kids so they know what we want to do. We have a corporate trustee to ensure it’s carried out as we intend. Our attorney has power to fire the trustee if there are problems. Our kids know all this and we’ll remind them every few years. 😊
My opinion is to honor the deceased brothers will and keep the money. If that bothers you then give it to charity. Relatives received ample share of estate.
Please also remember, the will does not change who the beneficiary is. After you divorce or the death of a spouse, change your will and your beneficiary with the life insurance company.
Hey...everbody taking sides here!!!!!! The writer never said if they were the sole beneficiaries. Just that they were named as beneficiaries in the insurance terms. Are the kids named at all? Or are they all named and they are pressuring this person to hive up theirs and their son's portion. We don't know this part.
From personal experience, inheriting while ur still alive and sane seems to be BEST!. Also, if no will, then everyone will be fighting each other. If u love your kids, leave it in writing.
As one of my old Pastors used to say, "Let Go, and Let GOD!" There's no way that I'd hold anyone else's inheritance. Money makes family members do strange things, definitely when they are not a true follower of faith. One thing is for sure, when the grubby meerkats get the money - they usually blow it within 3 months because they have no clue how to invest and gift money.
In their Will the letter writer would have been named as the legal guardian of the minor kids. If there's no mention of that, then the money was intended for the letter writer.
I mean if there’s a will, but using context clues we can deduct that writer was the main in case they die and the eldest son was the one in case the writer died. Dad should have updated it, but they likely had the convo about guardianship so assumed it would have been fine. If it was meant for the writer or their family it would have been to the writer or include the rest of the kids. The fact only those likely to be able to care for the kids is pretty damning. Mother died at 2019, so either that’s why the writer was picked (trusted by mother) or they didn’t have anyone else and the dad got the policy 2019-2023. Most likely case as grandparents would have been a more likely case. In the end the writer is leaving a lot of things out, probably on purpose. Like the age of eldest, the assets vs payout (likely the assets are nothing compared to the payout), etc. The fact they are pretty sure it was meant for the kids screams the parents told them something they didn’t disclose. In the end we don’t know the full story, but the one the writer is painting to favor their side sucks.
Also a house and car are likely not paid off. Man was around 40s, that’s not exactly the age when homes are paid in full. Also same for the ira. Especially when divided among themselves, best case they have a house they have to sell and payoff the mortgage. The car maybe paid for as they typically 5-6 years (but they tend to be worthless in value by comparison) The IRA won’t have been much raising kids alone
Give it to them when they are competent enough to not lose it all, they will thank you when they are competent, I’m 19 years old and I’m a pretty smart kid but I would not want to be controlling my dads money or his companies
I would look at the whole picture. If the kids were old enough and responsible, I would sign it over to them. If they were not, I would put it in a trust or whatever worked best so it would support them as long as possible.
Checking to see when the parents last changed their Wills might provide another clue. If the Wills were changed after the children were grown, then it's hard to believe it was an oversight, although that's still possible.
My parents had a "survivors will", meaning that their children had to wait until both of them had passed away. When our mother died, our father said, "Now you can take half of our savings and divide it amongst yourselves." At that time we were taking care of his finances, saw to it that he had cash for groceries and his bills paid, doing his tax returns, etc. "We're doing no such thing," we replied. We followed the stipulations of their will. They did not have that will because they did not trust their children, but to prevent any unwanted intervention from potentially greedy children-in-law.
When my children were young the Will provided them inheritance at age thirty. Why? Because most - the geat majority - of young adults will go and blow it all on frivolus things. Most 30 year olds and up have hopefully matured enough, have a family, or are starting a family, and therefore, the natural incentives for them change. Also, GREAT Will / Estate wisdom especially from 6:50 to 7:10! Do you have the guts to do that, or are you going to wimp out and let someone else - the Executor - take the blame? I did that representing my wife after she went Home to be with the Lord and, yes, me. Up until we had our Will updated, we had a notarized document conveying leaving one of our children out of the Will. Once the Will was updated, I had my attorney send each one of the children a copy of the Will & Trusts along with a letter that explained why the one child was left out at this point in the hope that they would wake up and make changes in their lives so that they could get a part of the inheritance. It's not easy, but as Dave Ramsey essentially states, it's the right thing to do!
Unless there is context not given in this question that would be convincing, they're even saying that they think this was an oversight. If that's true then they know deep down it's wrong to keep it
I never got any money from family. However I now realize I could have had a leg up with one. I may have done better. Give them the money. If they fail, their fault but no excuses.
Look, their intent was to care for them as minors UNLESS they had a convo with you about manages the money when they are adults. Absolutely no one would expect this when someone’s kids are adults without a conversation. This person is pretty sick for trying to keep it - these children LOST both of their parents. The money is not for her!! Either way - NONE of this money is for this woman!
You don't know the intent because the caller never mentioned previous conversations. I don't know the intent either, but unless the aunt was going to be the guardian of the minor children, why would the deceased parents never have had a conversation with the aunt about the intent of the insurance proceeds unless the aunt was intended to be the final recipient? Also, why would the nephew of the deceased parents be a recipient if sister of the deceased mom was a recipient? Finally, there is no information about the amount of the overall estate verses the amount of insurance. If the insurance was the largest portion of the estate, I would tend to think the intent was to get it to the kids. If the insurance was small portion of the estate, I would expect the deceased parents wanted to provide something to their sister and nephew.
In the absence of direct communication, you do what is best for others mentioned in the will. That is act as the executor. The kids were small so the kids were known. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t outline in their will who takes care of the kids while administering the money left. Once the kids reach a certain age, usually specified in the will, the kids get the money and full control of it.
I keep reading about how families get destroyed by money when someone passes away. When my mother passed away, we divided everything, then my 8 brothers and sisters each gave me some of their money to help me out. More than the money, I am so blessed to come from a wonderful, caring family. We have so much fun when we get together.
God bless your family.
❤
You're lucky. I had 3 family members steal from me.
I am truly blessed that I have a great family. I was the executor and my family was so patience and supportive. It took me 9 months to get everything settled and not one of my 5 siblings stressed me out. I have so much fun with my family also and love them so much. It amazes me how people fall out after death over something that doesn't belong to them. Greed is a powerful emotion.
@@vagabondabbie same bro not even lying
Money will always bring out someone’s true character.
Precisely …
I learned this from experience. Twice.
Really sad and scary when it’s your own family or spouse
One hundred percent because people are Greedy and money is the root of all evil
I have a family member who is a living example of this!
@@littleone7404 Love of money is the root of all evil
@@littleone7404 Actually it's "the love of money is the root of all evil". Money itself is just a tool. It's the greed that brings out the evil.
Excellent reminder to all of us. What we planned when our children were young probably no longer applies.
Divorce and re-marriage is another case where updating beneficiaries is important. A friend and her hubby were married for 10 years before either one of them thought to check that out on his work-sponsored life insurance - the ex was still the beneficiary.
The lady knows the money belongs to the kids. Do the right thing
I wonder about gift taxes since it wasn't willed to them. If she gives them "their shares" then wouldn't that fall under a gift from her rather than an inheritance?
@@papasquat355 The money belong to the children. Don’t think about man’s court; you will stand before ALMIGHTY GOD.
It would stealing.
People forget, I forgot I had a saving bank account that I put money in for years. I just found it!!!!
Be the better person. If they are responsible kids, give them the money. Dave is right here.
No, Dave is completely wrong here. The kids got other assets but not the insurance policy. You don’t know what the intentions were. Also you can’t just sign over the money without tax implications.
I think he could be wrong though on the legal aspect. From her comment it sounds very much as though that policy money was NEVER meant for her. And I think they could prove that in court even if she wasn't already admitting it. I mean, they got the policy while the kids were minors and named the person who would be the obvious guardian of those kids if the parents died. That seems pretty straight forward to me unless she has evidence showing the intent changed.
Dave is 100% wrong.
@@TheSecondWitness You have 0 integrity.
@@ericeandco Not true Insurance policies have no tax it can be cashed and given to the kids.
I am so glad my work makes me reset my beneficiaries every single year.
I really need to do this.
@@slonikvasa it’s just my HR department’s policy that everyone resets all of their benefit info (not just health insurance) every single year. My husband doesn’t. Usually, anyone can reset their benefit allocations but people tend not to actually do it.
That's great! And people don't realize that having someone as a beneficiary on your pension plan can supersede the will. If you're divorced, do you want your ex to get your pension instead of your current husband getting it?
I sat down with a estate lawyer and he brought up so many things that I wasn't aware of. He told me not to leave my jewelry to anyone in my will. In my state, all of it would have to be appraised and written detailed appraisals by a graduate gemologist is not inexpensive. I took a photo of each piece with alll the information about it and who I wanted it to go to . He suggested that I write a list of where I want those types of things to go in a letter, and have my executor put it in her safe deposit box. I also wrote my obituary which I update occasionally. I have the picture that I want used. I've told her where I want all my furniture to be donated after all my friends and neighbors to come in and take what they want. One of my friends wants all my books, one once all my photographs that I've taken in my career. All my railroad items go to a friend and she has a list of the charities that I want my money distributed to. She also has a list of all my passwords and all the important contacts in my phone have an Asterix behind them so she knows who to call.
You can tell I like being prepared!
@@heideknight9122hopefully you have now done it.
That’s how my benefits work too. Reset annually. Thankful because I’ve actually take the opportunity to change mine once
Ahh the greed kicks in. She said I think its an oversight, should I give it back. WTF? You just answered your damn question.
Right the answer is NO. It’s not an oversight. The kids got other assets including an IRA. Also you can’t just give it back. The assets must be distributed to the beneficiaries. That’s this man and his son. If he gives anyone the money it’s now a gift subject to gift tax. He would be reducing his lifetime unified gift tax credit which effects the taxability of his own estate.
Don't think she was actually asking "should I", she was actually asking "do I legally have to?"
Give it back….
@@ericeandcolol. They said in their question that they think it may have been an oversight.
And, that makes the most sense based on the info given.
She is not going to be at risk of hitting the lifetime gift tax cap in gifts to her nieces and nephews. No gift tax will be owed.
They CAN "just give it" once they receive it from the insurance company. And then file a simple gift tax form documenting it.
Greed.
You’re dumb huh
Where there’s a will, there’s a relative! Been thru this 5 times personally. It’s amazing who comes out of the woodwork.
Give the kids the money. The parents forgot to update the beneficiaries which could happen during a grieving period (his wife died). That said, check to make sure there are no tax implications for you and your son before giving it to them. If there are, you need to withhold that amount prior to dispensing it.
doesn't make sense why the guy didn't set up a trust for his kids makes no sense even while his wife was living ... it is his fault ... is SIL his mistress and the nephew in law his son ???? why on 🌎 would he have set his policy this way
@@KS-cl8brI won't pretend to know everything for certain. But I can only judge/assume the following from the info the sister-in-law/letter writer provided:
1. The policy was obtained when her deceased brother-in-law's children were minors. So this was probably years or decades ago.
2. The sister-in-law herself states that she believes that she and her son were made beneficiaries specifically because the children were minors. This makes sense and indicates that deep down she has strong doubts that the money is really meant for her.
3. Since her sister (the children's mother) who would have been the primary beneficiary is deceased, it is logical to assume that her brother-in-law may have put his sister-in-law and her son as secondary beneficiaries back then. Just in case BOTH the brother-in-law and his wife were to pass away, he assumed the sister-in-law and her older son would be responsible enough to use the money to help raise his children.
The summary of my position is this. There is no legal requirement to give the children the money in this case. But there is a strong moral argument to do so in the spirit of good family relations. This is different from if the sister-in-law was given the money in a will. If that was the case, there would be no argument whatsoever to give the children a dime, as the deceased intentions would have been crystal clear!
You don’t know the parents forgot to update the policy. Your assuming. And you can’t just give them the money. There’s tax consequences. It would be considered a gift.
@@ericeandco all one can do is assume as the person is deceased. Read note regarding withholding taxes
@@KS-cl8br I agree they should have used a trust.
I'd put my money on there being a combination of ignorance (not knowing how to do it or wanting to learn), pushing it off until later (procrastinating it because 'there will be time later'), and not wanting to pay the cost to set up a trust.
Some people (myself included) know they need to set up a trust and have not made the time for it yet. In that case they often will list family members as beneficiaries so they can act as a sort of informal executor until they get around to forming the trust.
It's unfortunate the deceased parents apparently didn't communicate at all with OP what their wishes were. That would have helped a lot.
I used to work in life insurance claims. Can't tell you how many times people forgot to change their beneficiary when they remarried, etc.
That is exactly right. So often an ex-wife gets the life insurance money simply because her ex husband forgot to change the beneficiary.
The IRA goes to the ex-wife - HaHa
@@rolandhansen812I'm pretty sure the "ex" who receives the insurance money, was the one keeping up the payments for the insurance.
@@rolandhansen812 If she's the mother of his children, it probably wasn't an "oversight."
@@homesteadrevivalsSometimes it is an oversight. My uncle didn’t take his ex wife off of his life insurance policies for years after he remarried because he is lazy and absent minded.
The insurance company was not supposed to tell them who the beneficiaries are. As someone who works with estates we can only give people information they are supposed to know. Go back to the company and file a formal complaint. I would be curious to know how long ago they listed you as the beneficiary you can find that out with the insurance company.
Exactly. The kids would not of received that info.
Might have been mentioned in the will.
"Oh and by the way kids we took out an insurance policy out check with [insert name here] for more details!"
It’s family so they might have heard it through other relatives or the beneficiaries themselves.
Might be some paperwork laying around
It literally says in the first 25 seconds of the video when they met with the insurance company they found out who the named beneficiaries are.
My mom did a living trust and will. I was the trustee and executor. There was a clause in the will that basically said that if you contest the will, you will be cut out. I made copies of the will and highlighted that part for each family member. It stopped a lot of discussions. I was so happy she had that i there.
My mother did that. I didn't want anything and I'd never contest it. It just showed me that she doesn't trust me.
Give the kids the money. It was intended for their upkeep while minors, so the intent was for the kids. It's amazing how inheritance all of a sudden changes people to ask "am I right to do . . . "
Well, if you have to ask that question, then you know the answer. Greed seems to take over "yeah, give it to the kids who lost their parents".
They're not minors any more and have no claim to the inheritance
@@Faesharlyn As was noted, legally you're right. Still doesn't mean that the right thing to do, is give it to the kids. Not everything has to be driven by the law or courts, or a document. If the person who called in, has to ask what the "right" thing to do is, they already know but are trying to find a reason to defend keeping it.
@dwaynemauk566 but we don't know what's happened between then and now, how much OP was involved with sister's family (for example, did they all live together and a family unit or pool their resources? )
I don't have enough information from the family to make the call, but my takeaway from the letter is that the "children" are adults who should bring on a mediator since they feel they have a valid claim.
Morally? Sure. With the information we have, split evenly among the kids seems fair unless their wills specifically exclude anyone but even if they do, what's the difference? It's just money at the end of the day.
@@Faesharlyn Agreed. "its just money at the end of the day" also applies to the adults.
@@FaesharlynThe love of money is the root of all evil.
Apparently money brings out the worst in people.
Mistake-Oversite - you guys are right. I'm going through paperwork getting set to retire. I just reviewed my insurance and found that the beneficiary was my husbands brother and wife. They were to be the guardians of our kids if both of us died. Don't think that applies any longer since the kids are 36 and 32 yo. Changed that right away. But would have been a weird situation since that was not my intent.
Give the children their parents’ money. What they do with it is up to them. They have lost both parents the last thing they need is to battle with their aunt.
@lifesabeach746
Says who, you? It wasn’t YOUR money, and the people whose money is was said the OPPOSITE of what you’re demanding. Who the hell are you to demand that? That’s obscene and laughable.
@@TheSecondWitnesssays the person who was left the money. She said she thinks it’s an oversight because the children were minors when they got the policy. Your take is what’s obscene and laughable.
Lost both parents as minors and the Aunt wants to keep the insurance money, what kind of human being is that?
I was willed all my aunt owned. I called her kids to come get the gold and diamond rings, the boat, guns, nick nacks then i sold the house and shared it with them. I had sold or given all my stuff away when she called and said she was lonely. Would i come stay with her. She only lived 3 months before getting a bad case of pneumonia and I had pneumonia also but didn’t have to be hospitalized. She never came out. The cousins were in shock after the funeral but knew all I’d given up to come care for her in her one bedroom little house.
@@alicemattsen2208 exactly this. These people have no idea what has been happening in the lives of this person who wrote the letter and her family's.
I could be completely wrong, but I think they were left the money to take care of the children while they were children. Then, as they became adults the policy just never got changed for whatever reason this is just my opinion I think the kids should now get the money I don’t care what their financial situation is. I don’t care if they would blow every penny of it, in my opinion it should be their money
My thoughts too. As an aunt, i can only guide/remind them but i wouldn't take their parents money.
Why would her son be on the policy as well in that case?
Policy must have been drawn up by an idiot. All of these policies should be future proofed so that if the kids are adults when the parents die they are automatically the beneficiaries.
@@nikfish1exactly
@@Weakeyedominantwell not if for some reason they wanted exactly what they indicated on the paperwork...that she and her son inherit the benefits from the life insurance. It's not like the kids were not named to get everything else...there was other money and assets that they left to the children. If they wanted the kids to have all of it then why would they have left everything else to the kids except for this?
I guarantee you she will keep it. She would have already given it to them if she felt the least bit uncomfortable about it. She’s looking for validation
Mind reader alert.
Her question was not actially ""should I", it's "do I legally have to?"
but didn't she say that a lot of other things were left to the children in the Will? It sounds to me like it was done intentionally, perhaps to thank the recipients for everything they've done for her. A lawyer would have asked her why she didn't name them in the will.
@@brookelondon8029 It would be odd to have a life insurance policy with a sibling as the beneficiary
@@brookelondon8029 Why would you leave a major life insurance policy to your brother/sister in law? You wouldn't. This was clearly a temporary situation while the kids were minors.
When my mom dies I am going to personally make sure my nephew/ her grandson gets something. This lad has nothing and she has asked me to take care of the money when she has gone…..he is my priority …no question!
A long time employee (30+ years) suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. His widow contacted benefits concerning his life insurance benefit. The beneficiary was his old girlfriend from decades earlier. I don’t know how it eventually worked out, but the beneficiary designation is ironclad.
In South Africa if they were married in community of property the law overrides the beneficiary and even the will sometimes.
This happens a lot in the military, when young and dumb people get married and divorced like changing underwear. I have known of an ex wife from ages ago coming in and scooping up everything, leaving the wife and kids of 30 years penniless.
A wil is suerceded by banks beneficiary.
🤢
HAHA so messed up to never make sure what you have .. A Person could make Millions but these Millions go to Past Partners
I seriously doubt the man took out a life insurance policy to make sure his wife’s sister is taken care. He wasn’t your brother. You shared no blood with him. Give those kids that money which was clearly intended for them.
You forget that the policy also includes her son, who is, in fact, BIL's actual NEPHEW, which does in fact make him an actual relative. The fact that he named her son, and not his offspring on it, makes it very clear it's to go to her son if it doesn't go to her. His kids were never named on the policy because they were never meant to inherit it. One or more of them would have been named on the policy, if it was intended for them. He probably intended that it would help with his Nephew's education if it wasn't needed to care for his kids (which it ended up not being needed). SO if anything, she "should" use it for her son's benefit, but his offsprings were never intended to receive it, they have never had any legitimate claim to it, and basically they're just being greedy and disgusting.
@@justinmileman7863So this father decided when his kids were young, to CUT THEM OUT OF ANY INHERITANCE. Guess he must have known his kids would grow up to be jerks!!!
Seriously, this will or whatever was made when the kids were minors. You can't leave money to minors only. You have to designate an adult.
I agree that this man did not intend to cut out HIS KIDS so that he could take care of his sister-in-law and her son.
What kind of father would do that?
One other thing, the son may have already been an adult when the beneficiary designation was made. It is likely the man named the son to receive money in case the aunt had died. You usually name two people to cover this situation.
The fact that he named the son may simply be for this reason.
Again, I ask you... this determination was made when his children were minors. In what universe would a man decide he wants to support his sister-in-law's son instead of his own?
@@cherfromtn8225 They inherited the house and various other monies.
Don't forget that, if it's legally YOUR money, usually life insurance isn't taxed, but GIFTS can be. And, as one poster pointed out, refusing the proceeds may trigger a contingent beneficiary issue. So, understand the issues before you act. If you want to GIVE the money, you may want to do it over several years to avoid gift taxes - something YOU pay. Also, don't too quickly determine you know someone else's intent. You right now are facing an unsolicited management issue. You may need the advice of a lawyer and maybe an accountant to get it right. The fact you're being pressured is the best reason in the world to move deliberately. And, since you may incur expense, and you didn't ask for this, it's fair for expenses to come out of the proceeds instead of your existing funds, regardless of what you decide.
Emailer didn't express any of this concern in the letter. Didn't even mention any wishes of the parents. I believe this person knows they inherited the money on accident and only wants to know, "Will I be an asshole if I kept this money for myself?"
Excellent advice
You can give 13 million with no taxes.
Giving it slowly over several years to avoid paying gift tax is considered structuring and is illegal. Will you get cought? Probably not if you do it right and under the table, but it is criminal never the less.
@@LegDayLas you have 13 million dollar lee way for no taxes on gifts.
The will has. No control of life insurance. The life insurance will be given to the person on the policy.
Yes...they didn't say otherwise
Beneficiary trumps the Will.
My parents have sat me down and told me what me and my brother r getting when they pass. I told my parents to spend all their money have all the fun they can. They r in their 70s and worked so stinkin hard they need to have all the fun they still can. They don’t need to worry about me I can take care of myself as an adult. I appreciate them trying to help me out but I think that’s an old mentality. They have the responsibility to take care of me till I’m 18 and then be there for me afterwards but that’s all I need is their love.
Its not an old mentality. It's a mentality of desire to perpetuate generational wealth. Both your mentality and theirs are as old as time.
As much as that is admirable, being the benficiary of parents whp are organized and know what they are doing. Even if theres not a penny in cash left there might be properties, trust, stocks whatever.
@@jameskirkpatrick5569 Uh yeah, of course.
Sometimes, it gives parents more enjoyment when the next generation takes the gift. To see their kids and grandchildren enjoying it is the best enjoyment they can have.
I feel the same for my sons and daughter.
A godly man leave inheritance for his children’s children. To spend all your money unnecessarily is immoral. Look at when people were godly they saved and built. Now they run up the debt and go to Europe.
Estates are not always as cut and dry and they make it sound. My in-laws had their estate and everyone agreed which brother would be the executor. Parents both passed and the brother didn't do what he was supposed to do. Took forever for my husband to finally get his portion because the brother would not be transparent in what he was doing to get all the assets straightened out. My husband finally had to hire his own lawyer to communicate with the estate lawyer to get things moving. Unfortunately he and his brother and sister have not spoken in a couple of years and they are all in their 60's and 70's. The estate lawyer agreed things were not right but sure wasn't in a hurry to put a stop to it. The longer it drug on the more money she got!
He's not kidding about things being different from state to state. I know that in North Carolina, without a will, everything goes to the surviving spouse, then kids, then parents, then siblings. Without a will in Texas, it's 50% to the spouse and 50% to the kids. Leaves the surviving spouse a big problem for a place to live when the kids want to sell the house that is partly theirs and the spouse can't afford to buy their portion.
No one has mentioned the ages of the "kids" who want the aunt and cousin to give them the money. Because the aunt and her son are the beneficiaries, I'd be more likely to think that they were made the beneficiaries on purpose. If it was just the aunt, I'd question if it was an oversight.
His letter said it was an over sight, so the kids was young, when it was taken out. The money was for the kids, so now they are adults the money should go to the kids hands.
Should have left more details like a trust till they are of age
I am so glad I saw this clip because this year I opened Roth IRA's and 529 accounts for my kids in addition to their regular savings accounts. I truly want to do my best to put any little bit I can away for their future. I will be looking at private life insurance next and certainly naming them as my beneficiaries. Finally, I need to create a living will. I will take care of all of it this year. Dave Ramsey is my financial guide at this time.
How did you open a Roth IRA for a minor?
@@godfathaofyoI mean you could open, just can't put any money in it
@@Generali087 Okay, was just making sure i wasn't missing something i can be doing to help my kids
@@godfathaofyo best thing you can do is contribute to a 529 plan for your kids so they don't have student loans debt like most people calling Dave these days.
A trust is way easier on tax's and no lawyer fee for probate
The letter writer knows this was an error. The deceased trusted her to help the bereaved children with the money when they were too young to handle it. So why would the deceased leave an insurance policy to the letter writer now that the children are older? Please do the honorable thing and give the children their money!
There us absolutely no way you could possibly know that. You don't know their lives or what circumstances were going on. If he left everything else, the other money, the house, the vehicles to the kids then maybe there was a reason he wished for his sister and nephew to have this money. We have no idea how much this money was, it might have only been $30,000 and maybe he wished for them to have it since the kids received everything else. There is just no way to know despite what you insist that _you know_ and that the _sister knows_
😏
I agree with you and the person replying is probably wrong.
@gunnerarshavin2009
Who are you to override the stated wishes of those people’s money? Love how you believe you know everything and can read minds. You have NO CLUE what they intended. We only know what was written.
@mogamethanu I am wrong that there is no way she could know that for sure? You disagree with my statement that we have no idea what their life was or how much money the life insurance payout was?
If that's what you think then you are also delusional!
Because we have no way if knowing any if these things we cannot possibly say that we know what this person's intentions were and that one scenario can be just as likely as any other...and that was my whole point. I swear people don't use their brains.
@@TheSecondWitness exactly this!!
Thanks Uncle Dave for teaching us how to think about money and especially your horse sense!
Dave is right, that is what rich people do, but they also have the money to pay someone to fully manage that estate planning and take care of everything but the discussion and the signature
Don't leave a chaotic disaster for family to sort out and fix because a will and estate plan is "too expensive". Make it a priority and then keep up with it through life's changes. This is everyone's personal responsibility.
You just can’t “sign over” the money. If the aunt disclaims the policy, it goes to the contingent beneficiary if one exists. If no contingent, it goes into the estate and gets probated per the will. It probably would be better if the aunt takes the insurance payout and gifts it to nieces and nephews using annual gift exemptions or puts it into an irrevocable trust with the nieces and nephews as beneficiaries.
The beneficiary aunt does NOT control the payout if she disclaims.
@marianne16897 he's saying she can gift it to them but she would either have to give it in tax exempt increments yearly or put it in a trust for them. if she just writes them a check they willl be taxed to hell on it.
@marianne16897 I mentioned that possibility and also to set up,a trust with it. It is her money, tax free. The problem is if her nieces and nephews don’t want her to have any control except to have the payout sent to them . That can’t happen unless they want to wait for probate.
@marianne16897lol...thats exactly what the OP just said...that rather than say she doesn't want the money go ahead and take it and then turn around and gift it to the kids if that's what she wishes to do. Did you not read what they said?😊
@marianne16897 no worries....my apologies if I sounded rude...it wasn't my intention but upon rereading it I kinda came off that way a bit
That’s a lot of trouble, expense, and tax implications for the aunt. Maybe she doesn’t want to be embroiled in all that drama in the coming years, arbiting requests from grown nieces and nephews and having to tiptoe around the tax code. Much easier to just disclaim the policy and let the chips for where they may.
I had a very close friend growing up who sadly passed away about ten years ago.
We were nearly inseparable growing up and were close with each other's families.
On her death a couple of years ago, his mother left his portion of the estate to me "in his honor." It wasn't giant, but neither family is particularly wealthy so it meant a bit more than might be expected.
His brother and sister were not happy. Demanded that I just give the whole thing to them.
The lesson here isn't the story. It's what Dave is talking about. It's not only necessary to have the paperwork but to make sure everyone understands what is coming.
I hope to everything holy you said “NO” and walked away.
Mee too!
The brother and sister are trash. They have more lust for their mother's money than they do respect for their mother's wishes.
Did you give it to them?
@@XsilifOf course not.
I would follow the will as it is written. A lawyer should review it prior to any changes made as whatever is done will make some relative mad. I have seen a post distribution renegotiation of a will personally and it cost me in several ways - not worth what was left and lost.
Of course you would, but the parents clearly wanted to leave the money to the children
She knows it’s not her money. She just wants a reason to keep it. It’s not your money and the kids aren’t being greedy for expecting you to do the right thing.
I'm expecting this woman to be fairly old, too. Generally, you want to be on good terms with your nieces and nephews at such a stage in your life.
I own a property with my sister and share a bank account with her. I would never keep that money or her assets from her grown children or her young son.
I can think of some reasons why I would. Ask your sister now, does she think her children would benefit more from a lump sum of cash that they would use wisely or would they benefit more from you making those financial decisions on their behalf.
@cathy7824
That’s you. These other people obviously can make their own mind up and decided to give it to the people they chose. Its their money, not yours, and they can make their own decisions.
Yes, but if she dies her kids can demand you sell the property or pay them their share if her estate says her assets go to her kids.
@@suen5006 Possibly - joint bank accounts and jointly owned property generally go directly to the other owner listed on the deed/account and isn't part of the willed property. It often depends on the laws where they live.
As long as everything is spelled out in each of your wills, you will becOK. Sit down with a lawyer and ask him what you need to do, if you haven't already. If you don't, you could be taken to court based on what they said they were promised.
Might be one of the first time ive seen Dave shifting his eyes to check in with John when giving his answer.
I disowned most of my relatives due to the numerous times they stole money from my grandmother, yet if I got a million tomarrow my dirtbag aunt and her kids would expect me to divide it with them.
I would ask the ‘when was the last beneficiary change’.
thats kinda the pain about estate planning and wills.
each and everything thing must be updated.... SEPERATELY
1) the succession of the home
2) the cars
3) high value items
4) seperate buckets of cash like
401k, IRAs, saving accounts, 529s and so on
5) the life insurance policy
6) and so on
each and every single account must be kept up to date.
I've heard its a major pain in the butt for remarried folks, cuz what you establish (say in your 20s and 30s) but forgot about in your 40s to 60s or death would ALL BE WILLED TO THE FIRST WIFE and I guess that lineage.
I'm not a lawyer so do your own reading and get professional advice on it. but I will say this. keep your docs up to date.
for me, I'm planning on updating that mess at age 45, cuz thats when I'd be within 30 years of a term life policy to actually be useful.
i mean, 45 plus 30 is 75, sooo i could be statically be dead by then.
any sooner and I'll just use the money to pay off debts more aggressively like loans, credit cards, auto financing or my mortgage. owning a home in full is a better will to my lineage than some cash (okay not really but its better for ME)
Good point.
Yep that might shed more light on it!😊
If you decide to give them the money, be sure to do so consistently.
Don't treat any child different than any other one.
Are you telling me that you believe your dearly departed sister and B.I.L didn't want their money to go to their kids. Your a mother as well what would you want if the shoe was on the other foot. These poor kids.😢
If that's what he wanted then why did he indicate that everything else, the other money, the house, the vehicles but yet not say this particular money should go to them as well? Why wouldn't he have just went ahead and left everything to them? Maybe he for some reason wished for her and her son to have that money. We don't know their lives or what all has occurred.
@iknow9894
Yeah, sure, these “poor kids” demanding that someone else’s money is theirs 😂
Maybe the brother just wanted to help his sister out for whatever reason. She did that he left it to and her son. We don't know how old her son is or if he has special needs. He probably thought his kids are grown up and don't need the money. He left them the savings and everything else.
@@PrimateProductionshe probably updated the will but forgot to update the life insurance policy.
Bottom line is the money belongs to this man and his son. He needs professional advice from an attorney and CPA before he transfers that money to anyone else anyway. Huge tax and possible legal implications.
As an estate planning attorney, I can tell you that Dave is 100% right. I end up generating more fees in remedial work than I do for preventive work. Keep up with your estate planning. Visit your attorney every 5 to 10 years at the very least.
John, they inherited a bunch of other assets, so your scenario of them wanting you to "protect" their adult children doesn't add up. If that was truly the case, they would have set up "protection" for the kids with all the other assets.
Not even close. That does not happen all the time.
John Delony is a moron.
Facts I just set up one of these for my son🙏🏾
The beneficiaries of the assets may have been designated much later in life when the children were older. It’s very easy to overlook old policies.
You can only "gift" a certain amount of money per year, per the IRS. You may want to "gift" the money each year (the max) until the funds are exhausted. Consult a estate attorney before any funds are distrubuted.
Our mother passed in 2022, found out her husband took her to his nephew, a financial advisor, and betrayed her. In her mind us kids would get the money in her investments. He also told us he wanted to buy her house, but bought a different house, didn't tell us, and stripped her house of everything valuable in secret. He then continued to go back to mom's house and steal more stuff. Mom had a will too, the first item was that she wasn't leaving him anything. He stoled her jewelry too. Jerk stood in front of us kids saying he didn't want anything from Mom's estate, not one penny was his words. He had already laid his plans, his daughter wore Mom's emerald earrings and ring to moms funeral knowing full well Mom wanted her jewlery to go to my niece. What a POS
Yeah...I always figure that if someone remarries, the kids gotta just waive bye bye to any expectation of an inheritance. There are so many stories of the 1st family getting screwed over.
If she had a will get the stuff back in court. Pay to publish the story in news articles and on online blogs. Law and shame are powerful tools.
@@divekatdreaming No people get screwed over because we act like children when it comes to money as a
society. It's your responsibility to go talk to Mom or Dad and find out what you will inherit then act like an adult spend the money and get the inheritance put in trust just like rich people do. That way you WILL INDEED get the money when the parent dies.
You go get a cheap or free lawyer and get it done. Long before ANY illness pops up.
Make them put in it writing what you the child will get and what the new spouse will get and make sure it's separate!!!
I have found that most of the time kids get screwed by step
parents cause you kids insist on treating them like shit then they get you back when your parent dies. Kissing a little bit of ass goes a long way to making things easier on yourself in the stressful even if losing a parent. You never see this stuff happen when the kids decide to be friends with or even just tolerate the step-parent.
@@DiligoBarba Definitely. There wouldn't be an issue if people used trusts.
@@DiligoBarba I look at it differently. Inheritance is 100% the parents' responsibility. Sure, the kids should have open and productive conversations with their parents, but at the end of the day it is on the parents to actually fulfill their responsibilities.
That includes using wills and trusts.
I think we agree on the solution, more or less, but not on where the 'blame' lies.
It’s theirs. At the end of the day, it IS theirs.
Yep
Legally its not so sit down and be wrong.
@MyAirMyles legally it belongs to the sister and the nephew. If you are arguing against that then it is YOU that is wrong.
Legally not. But from a moral perspective, if she believes it was in her name in case the kids were orphaned while minors (which she says she does) then keeping it would be wrong.
@Kivlor legally not what? _Legally_ it DOES belong to the sister and her son, the nephew. How can anyone attempt to argue against that when they are the ones listed as the beneficiaries on the policy?
My nephew screwed up the same way.
His will named his wife BY NAME.
After they divorced he never changed it, so now his ex got the inheritance and his daughter got left out in the cold.
If she was legitimate, he'd have been on the birth certificate, and her inheritance rights would have been legally ensured. So, he got divorced because he had an affair and produced the kid. Sucks to be her, but it is no sorrow that his affair bastard, who never should have been created in the first place, did not get what she did not deserve.
@@justinmileman7863I don't think so. What is on the will is what is legal. If the man left ALL of his worldly goods to his ex-wife, she gets everything. His daughter is out on the cold, but it has nothing to do with her being illegitimate. You can cut out legitimate relatives in a will. The court will do what you list on that will.
@@justinmileman7863What??
More like the wife was a cheater or drug addict, had an affair and left the marriage and abandoned her husband and child.
Their money? The mere fact that they think it's theirs is concerning. Do they need the money? Isn't the house car etc enough? Do you know it's an oversight? What did they tell you ?
Come on. Why would it be more likely to be for their aunt and cousin than for them? Especially if this dates back to them being minors. They're not entitled to anything, but this seems unlikely.
I think it's much more concerning that the caller "thinks it may have been an oversight" and is still questioning (along with you) if she should give it to them.
Crazy.
Greed. Until you've experienced it, you'll never understand
When I was five, I asked my dad what I might inherit, and he said I will get nothing, when he died I got nothing. 😂❤
Dave IS right DO NOT be lazy or a coward regarding estate planning. Note, he didn't say what you should or shouldn't do with your estate that is up to you. But he did say, ADDRESS IT before you die. And if you don't you are either lazy or a coward or both! [and of course change it as your circumstances change i.e. kids get older, etc.)
And for those who do not like Dave I don't know how you could disagree with that, but I am sure you will find a way.
Why are you so angry? Lol
Ask the insurance company when was the last time the policy beneficiary was updated. If it never was, I say give those kids THEIR money.
@anndeecosita3586
Funny how you’re dictating whose money it is, when YOU had nothing to do with this.
@@TheSecondWitness why are you being sarcastic? They offered a reasonable idea. If the insurance policy was modified after the kids became adults, it's clear the money was intended for the aunt. If it was never updated, it signals that it was for the kids. Why are you mad about a reasonable suggestion that provides clarity?
@CreamIceMs
Don’t be ridiculous. She put “THEIR money” in bold. Wow, glad the 2 of you can read minds, and know where other peoples money should go - even AFTER that person put in writing where their money was to go 😂
@@TheSecondWitnessStop being a clown. It’s a discussion people are having.
@tonycrabtree3416
You’re the clown, along with anyone who tries to dictate other peoples money. Imagine the absolute gall you have to have to tell someone their money needs to be given to someone else. “THEIR” money? Haha try again. That’s pathetic.
The money should go to the kids, either directly or in a trust. No way I would keep the money, it would be like stealing from my nephews/nieces. This guy knows that money wasn't meant for him.
I dont know how she sleeps at night
My grandmother lost one of her sons. He had 6 kids and a wife. Never updated his life insurance policy leaving it to his mother. She kept the money, bought her a new home and left his wife and kids to fend for themselves. The lesson here is GET A WILL and review it and beneficiaries ANNUALLY .
@@cyoohoosThat’s awful of your granny. Although I don’t think having a will give his wife the insurance money. That’s separate. Sounds like he forgot to update and didn’t anticipate his mother would be so cruel when he initially took out the policy.
@@cyoohoosthis is your uncle and his wife's fault for not ensuring this was corrected the moment they decided to try to make baby #1, let alone the 6th kid
Wow sounds like you you know exactly what someone (who you never met), wants to do with their money (that was never yours). Maybe they really meant to give the money to YOU! Hurry, call Dave and give him your routing and account numbers so he can tell those people where to send your money 😂
It’s your money! You and your oldest son are the legal beneficiaries. You can’t just sign it over without big tax implications. You should see an experienced estate attorney that is well versed in tax. Some attorneys are also CPA’s. Just make sure you stay informed and in control. Maybe I’d set up trusts for all the kids and remain executor. Hire professionals as needed and keep on top if results.
"You're not entitled to anything because you're kin"
Shocking. In Norway You are guranteed a part of Your inheritance no matter what. However, Your relative is free to give anything and all away to whomever while they are alive.
The fact that she is hesitating to give the children their inheritance speaks volumes to her integrity.
That could be taken as positive and negative.
Doesn’t it speak equal volumes that the children think they are entitled to money that was left to someone else? She’s asking Dave what his thoughts on it which means she is intent on doing it as the parents saw fit.
That's not what she is saying. She's saying that they have an inheritance coming later. And that she thinks that what was left to her son and her was an over sight. That's not the same thing as their only being one inheritance and it went to the non children. If that was the case I'm woth you. But that's not what she said.
@@ThrifterGuyshe thinks it’s an oversight because the parent should’ve changed the beneficiary when the kids were grown so they would’ve received the insurance money, but failed to do so as it is legally the Aunt doesn’t have to give them money and I can’t believe the kids are demanding she do so..them demanding the money would make me not want to give them a penny since they did receive a 401k and other things
@Shopgirl1 I agree other things including a house I believe. So they are already ungrateful. There's a reason why wealth doesn't normally last more than 3 generations.
She knows what the truth is - she even admits she thinks it was an oversight.
Legally, she's correct. Morally she needs to hand over the money.
I would give it to them when they are matured enough to handle the money properly.
Went through something like this with my sister regarding my father’s wishes for the dividing of his farm estate, my sister had left the farm at 18 and I stayed and worked alongside my father while starting and building my own farming business separate of my father.. when he passed unexpectedly it was revealed that his entire estate go to myself except for half of the value of his estate at the time my sister left the farm at 18 and that was a stated value on the will.. my sister tried arguing that my father hadn’t anticipated the growth in value his estate might gain and had he known he was dying he would have rewritten the will to reflect that.. Being the named executive of his estate I simply followed his instructions and told he she could blame him for not being more diligent in his thinking when she met up with him in the after life… Heirs & beneficiaries are not responsible for interpreting their parents writings or making moral judgments about them.. Sorry not sorry but death is just another business and sometimes isn’t fair..
Joel Salatin writes about the kids who stay and work the farm are probably the right ones to inherit the whole farm.
My single godfather uncle died and left his money to me. I was 6. His brothers and sisters made such a stink that my dad divided the money and gave it to them. They rarely talked to us after that. I am sure because they were embarrassed and didn’t like seeing me.
I don’t think your father should have done that. If rather than being your father, he were a guardian ad litem appointed by the court to protect your interests, he would have no authority to give your gift away.
Make sure you leave a crystal clear will!
My husband's aunts tried to take the amount from his grandparents that was meant for him and his disabled sister, ended up threatening to sue them, but didnt have to go that far since the will was clear and they were in the wrong.
My guess is it was an oversight and the "kids" should get the $$$.
Unfortunately minus gift tax
You don't get a vote.
You don't get a vote
@@greggpurviance7252 man the government really sucks.
Ok but that's just your "guess". It is just as likely that he intended for his sister and nephew to have it
Great reminder to get a will so my adult children do not have to deal with a mess!
That is so true some families hate each other because of money, the first time i told my eldest sister no because i realized she was taking my kindness for granted , i am now living to regret it because she stopped talking to me, our mom intervene but she still hardly speak to me only if its absolutely necessary
yep, grandfather passed half a decade ago and my aunt and grandma took everything and moved 4 states away.
its sad what happens when money changes people but you cant let it control how you respond to selfish people
❤
Don’t regret it. If your sister stopped talking to you because you said no to giving money, she is in the wrong, not you. She is too entitled to think she had right to your money. I would say good riddance. Wait until you have a spouse and she would still continue to beg, and then it would’ve become a huge problem for you.
Sounds like your sister stopped talking to you because you stopped paying her to talk to you.
Don’t regret it.
You made the right choice.
@@tyronejackson832 it would appear so. I never thought of it like that , i was buying a relationship
I think it depends on the amount. If the aunt were to have tax consequences from gifting a lump sum, it may have to be distributed over several years, if at all.
This seems like the worst period.
Even the market are now very unpredictable. Started investing recently when the market prices were a bit high,today I am more than 60% down!..
Don’t be confuse buying the dip in a bear market, with guaranteed future returns. Just because that company is down 60%+ from ATH does NOT make it a sound long-term investment. Make sure you’re investing in great companies. kudos to harriet alice
I agree just reached my goal of $500k yearly trade earnings. Setting realistic goals is an essential part of trading
Please educate me, i'm willing to make consultations to improve my situation,
She's recognized as 'Mrs alice harriet. One of the finest portfolio managers in the field. She's widely recognized; you should take a look at her work.
Yeah, 123k from alice harriet. , looking up to acquire a new House, blessings
This is why everyone needs to actually discuss their estate plan with family. Just waiting until you die for family to learn your wishes is beyond ridiculous.
He should buy a viper and say " dang thats too bad" and rip a fat burnout.
No .There sounds like there's more than enough money to go around.Maybe you'll be lucky and never see them ever again.
As an insurance agent, this is 100% an oversight.
People put reliable family members as beneficiaries and FULLY expect them to split it with the family evenly.
Then they should have allocated it accordingly in the policy via contingents. When my dad died, my mom made the necessary changes to policies within a month of his passing. My policies have my husband as primary and my kids as contingents. It’s up to the policy owner to handle their business. The idea of mind reading being a requirement is ridiculous
@@whosaidthat9265The fact that they should have doesn’t mean that there isn’t a moral responsibility for people to do the right thing.
@@murderofcrows7738 and what is the right thing? Ignoring the instructions of he deceased and giving it to the kids because their having a fit? The parents made sure to leave everything else to the kids and had beneficiaries in order for retirement funds etc. This doesn’t seem like an error. They paid the policy every month so the probability they just forgot about it is next to zero
@@whosaidthat9265 its actually close to 100% that they forgot to change it. most people set it and forget it.
@@whosaidthat9265 The reason he didn't put the children as contingents is that the children were under 18 at the time. Many insurance carriers will not accept any beneficiaries under 18 (some carriers do). Unfortunately, the only time people remember to update beneficiaries is when someone passes away.
You can call the insurance company for notes from the rep on the conversation at the time
We made it very clear in our trust that anyone who challenges it gets nothing. We’ve talked to the kids so they know what we want to do. We have a corporate trustee to ensure it’s carried out as we intend. Our attorney has power to fire the trustee if there are problems. Our kids know all this and we’ll remind them every few years. 😊
Disappointed that this did not warn about the tax consequences.
Life insurance doesn’t cause a taxable event, so what tax?
My opinion is to honor the deceased brothers will and keep the money. If that bothers you then give it to charity. Relatives received ample share of estate.
Assuming this is all the information available, give it to the kids. No matter how they act, its the right thing to do most likely.
I’ll admit it. I have a weak spot for inheritance drama 😂
SAME
Same. I especially enjoy it when an obvious money-grubber gets absolutely nothing.
@@gannicusfinch7068yeah but in this case the kids didn’t get it because they were minors at the time. So greedy aunt wants to keep it.
Yes at the time of the policy being taken out
Me too😫🙊
Mr. Ramsey, you are spot on, you are not entitled, and you are not entitled to decide a beneficiary a beneficiary does not deserve that money!
I say put it in a trust fund so they don't use it all up all in 6 months.
so spend $2k to babysit adults
Please also remember, the will does not change who the beneficiary is. After you divorce or the death of a spouse, change your will and your beneficiary with the life insurance company.
Hey...everbody taking sides here!!!!!! The writer never said if they were the sole beneficiaries. Just that they were named as beneficiaries in the insurance terms. Are the kids named at all? Or are they all named and they are pressuring this person to hive up theirs and their son's portion. We don't know this part.
I believe they must be … they’re getting an IRA, House, vehicles, etc …
Well yes we do know. It was very clearly stated that the kids were left everything else, the other money, the house, the vehicles, etc.
From personal experience, inheriting while ur still alive and sane seems to be BEST!. Also, if no will, then everyone will be fighting each other. If u love your kids, leave it in writing.
I would recommend a trust fund. A lot more secure than a will.
Not more "secure" only bypasses probate.
@@greggpurviance7252and becomes untaxable in perpetuity. So. Much more secure from
Uncle Sam.
As one of my old Pastors used to say, "Let Go, and Let GOD!" There's no way that I'd hold anyone else's inheritance. Money makes family members do strange things, definitely when they are not a true follower of faith. One thing is for sure, when the grubby meerkats get the money - they usually blow it within 3 months because they have no clue how to invest and gift money.
In their Will the letter writer would have been named as the legal guardian of the minor kids. If there's no mention of that, then the money was intended for the letter writer.
I mean if there’s a will, but using context clues we can deduct that writer was the main in case they die and the eldest son was the one in case the writer died. Dad should have updated it, but they likely had the convo about guardianship so assumed it would have been fine. If it was meant for the writer or their family it would have been to the writer or include the rest of the kids. The fact only those likely to be able to care for the kids is pretty damning.
Mother died at 2019, so either that’s why the writer was picked (trusted by mother) or they didn’t have anyone else and the dad got the policy 2019-2023. Most likely case as grandparents would have been a more likely case.
In the end the writer is leaving a lot of things out, probably on purpose.
Like the age of eldest, the assets vs payout (likely the assets are nothing compared to the payout), etc.
The fact they are pretty sure it was meant for the kids screams the parents told them something they didn’t disclose.
In the end we don’t know the full story, but the one the writer is painting to favor their side sucks.
Also a house and car are likely not paid off. Man was around 40s, that’s not exactly the age when homes are paid in full. Also same for the ira. Especially when divided among themselves, best case they have a house they have to sell and payoff the mortgage. The car maybe paid for as they typically 5-6 years (but they tend to be worthless in value by comparison)
The IRA won’t have been much raising kids alone
Give it to them when they are competent enough to not lose it all, they will thank you when they are competent, I’m 19 years old and I’m a pretty smart kid but I would not want to be controlling my dads money or his companies
You're not entitled anything just because we're kin.
I would look at the whole picture. If the kids were old enough and responsible, I would sign it over to them. If they were not, I would put it in a trust or whatever worked best so it would support them as long as possible.
What if the late sister was intending for the policy to bless her sister & the inheritance is as it was meant to be?
Even though she herself doesn't believe that.
Checking to see when the parents last changed their Wills might provide another clue. If the Wills were changed after the children were grown, then it's hard to believe it was an oversight, although that's still possible.
She knows that $$ was meant for their kids. I guarantee she will keep it
But why would she bother to ask if she was planning on keeping it. At least give up 50%
My parents had a "survivors will", meaning that their children had to wait until both of them had passed away. When our mother died, our father said, "Now you can take half of our savings and divide it amongst yourselves." At that time we were taking care of his finances, saw to it that he had cash for groceries and his bills paid, doing his tax returns, etc.
"We're doing no such thing," we replied. We followed the stipulations of their will.
They did not have that will because they did not trust their children, but to prevent any unwanted intervention from potentially greedy children-in-law.
"I think we're supposed to give money to their kids"
John: "are you safe?"
^😂 💯 Delony will never cease to do everything in his power to justify a woman's deplorable behavior.
LOL
@@BillDaBurgerEater Of course, a majority of his audience and callers are women.
😂😂
@@BillDaBurgerEater. It's a valid question, even if she's an a**hole.
When my children were young the Will provided them inheritance at age thirty. Why? Because most - the geat majority - of young adults will go and blow it all on frivolus things.
Most 30 year olds and up have hopefully matured enough, have a family, or are starting a family, and therefore, the natural incentives for them change.
Also, GREAT Will / Estate wisdom especially from 6:50 to 7:10!
Do you have the guts to do that, or are you going to wimp out and let someone else - the Executor - take the blame?
I did that representing my wife after she went Home to be with the Lord and, yes, me. Up until we had our Will updated, we had a notarized document conveying leaving one of our children out of the Will. Once the Will was updated, I had my attorney send each one of the children a copy of the Will & Trusts along with a letter that explained why the one child was left out at this point in the hope that they would wake up and make changes in their lives so that they could get a part of the inheritance.
It's not easy, but as Dave Ramsey essentially states, it's the right thing to do!
She’s saying what they were left to justify keeping the rest. She knows she’s in the wrong and can’t believe this is even a question
Yes. Evil.
God has severe warnings in the Bible for those who take advantage of orphans.
Forget the original intentions or any oversight, I’d take the money and run, and the kids are on their own.
Sign it over ma’am. This is greed looking for justification.
I tend to agree. She wants to hear someone say, “Keep it,” so that she can do this without having a nagging conscience.
Greed? Wouldn’t greed be already having inherited property, retirement funds etc but having a fit over a policy payout? Tf?
She 100% knows it is for the kids. Just looking for an excuse to take it. If she thought it was for her she would already be spending it. Terrible.
Unless there is context not given in this question that would be convincing, they're even saying that they think this was an oversight. If that's true then they know deep down it's wrong to keep it
@@whosaidthat9265not greedy to expect your inheritance, then someone else that’s supposed to give it to you is like “well I don’t legally have to”
I never got any money from family. However I now realize I could have had a leg up with one. I may have done better. Give them the money. If they fail, their fault but no excuses.
Look, their intent was to care for them as minors UNLESS they had a convo with you about manages the money when they are adults. Absolutely no one would expect this when someone’s kids are adults without a conversation. This person is pretty sick for trying to keep it - these children LOST both of their parents. The money is not for her!! Either way - NONE of this money is for this woman!
moral highground much. you don't know the family dyanmic.
You don't know the intent because the caller never mentioned previous conversations. I don't know the intent either, but unless the aunt was going to be the guardian of the minor children, why would the deceased parents never have had a conversation with the aunt about the intent of the insurance proceeds unless the aunt was intended to be the final recipient? Also, why would the nephew of the deceased parents be a recipient if sister of the deceased mom was a recipient? Finally, there is no information about the amount of the overall estate verses the amount of insurance. If the insurance was the largest portion of the estate, I would tend to think the intent was to get it to the kids. If the insurance was small portion of the estate, I would expect the deceased parents wanted to provide something to their sister and nephew.
Probate courts don't make decisions based on what the intent was. You cannot speculate as to intent.
You just made that up lol nobody knows their internet because the policy owners didn’t handle their business
We don't have enough facts to be making such statements. They wouldn't expect their nephew to care for his cousins of about the same age, would they.
In the absence of direct communication, you do what is best for others mentioned in the will. That is act as the executor.
The kids were small so the kids were known. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t outline in their will who takes care of the kids while administering the money left. Once the kids reach a certain age, usually specified in the will, the kids get the money and full control of it.