That baby experiment is how my mom was my whole life! I’m now 75 and have never had anyone show me genuine love. As an unconscious codependent, I have always felt that to be my responsibility. I certainly know better now, but I have no desire to even attempt another relationship. Just spending my remaining years as my authentic self will be comfort enough!
@@taylorpresley4604 My grandparents were not loving either, which probably explains my parents. But I thank God he gave me a good inner spirit which ultimately helped me survive and now thrive. Prayers for you on your journey!
@@wiser1254 It is interesting that I wrote that statement one day ago and I became real honest with myself and I think perhaps my grandmother may have been a narc too. I just have a few clues that she was possibly but I really think she probably was. As much as truth hurts it is still much better than living in denial. Jesus said the truth sets us free and that is so true.
@@taylorpresley4604 you are NEVER alone. The love and protection of Christ is always with you. I would never marry again (if I get out of my current situation) the apostle Paul had it right......
Empath/codependent here. I used to walk into my Zumba class and feel almost immediately who was upset, in distress or having problems. I used to ask myself, why do I have to feel all this, and why do I feel it is my business/responsibility? It was a short time later I discovered the man I was married to was showing behaviors that frightened me. I subsequently went into therapy, discovered that I was married to a covert narcissist, and divorced him. Thanks to your videos, I have been able to heal on a much deeper level.
@@darlene3747 Don’t process their feelings-only yours! Hear what they’re saying, acknowledge it, breathe, and then feel what you’re feeling and respond in terms of what you want and need-not what they want and need.
@@wiser1254 thanks im doing this now as I've been trying save others pain instead of my pain not any more. I'm infj and its so hard but its a blessing too. God bless u all.
My parents were neither alcoholics nor drug addicts. They were lovely people who were not capable of connecting emotionally with me. However, that was enough to do the "work". I forgive them for this was the best they could do with the consciousness they had and now I take the responsibility to work on me and create the best version of myself!
After watching one of your many wonderful videos a truth was presented to me. I asked myself when will my depression and anxiety would go away. My inner self said, "when I can accept things as they are and not the way I want them to be." Truth. Thank you so much Lisa for all your videos and truth. You are truly a Godsend and maybe I am being selfish in saying this but I am glad you becoming a nurse didn't work out because God has used you in a powerful way to spread healing and truth. Mankind needs emotional healing just as much as physical healing.
Amen. Taylor, well praising of Lisa’s God sent teachings. I have read books regarding codependency, but they have never reached me like Lisa has… In fact, I have listened this video 3 times, just so it can stick better in my brain and each time I listen to it, I get something more out of it.
This is exactly how I feel !.....my parents only accepted this sentence " everything's okay" and I married a verbally and emotionally abusive person when I was 18 years old, and as I started to become so unhappy I would tell my parents about it and they listened and cared, but then said "well will go back to it you know you'll be okay" so I learned to minimize and disregard because I'm supposed to just keep "everything okay" I basically lived my life my whole life I'm 62 years old !! lived making sure my mother thought that "everything was fine with me" when it never was
Lots of people do. It hurts A LOT...like A WHOLE LOT to know you've wasted YEARS with someone that didn't love you, they just loved what you did for them. Whatever need they had. I was a one stop shop myself. Whether it was comforting, a sex toy, a punching bag, a sounding board for rage, a scapegoat, or an indentured servant, I was the IPPS(Intimate Partner Primary Source) and nothing more. Of course I had an alcoholic father and a codependent mother, so I got all kinds of personality disorders from them and her. Being both an empath AND codependent is like a unicorn steak for a narcissist. I couldn't ever leave because I loved her and would feel guilty. I spent YEARS thinking if maybe I just did or said(insert any of a million things here) she wouldn't be so unhappy and angry. It'll take YEARS of therapy before I can recover.
Thank you for this. I had great parents and a great childhood but got involved in a relationship with an actual psychopath who almost killed me 3 times he completely destroyed my soul and I do believe it rewired my brain because it was from the ages of 18 to 26 and your brain isn’t even done developing until you are 25. The effects of his abuse are affecting me to this day.
I was in a relationship with a narcissist from ages 16 to 24. My brain developed within and under that abuse, didn't physically try to kill me but I wasn't allowed to live, and I needed to be willing to give my life for him. He was very happy I was willing to let him hit me and would say " Praise God, anyone else would hit you/leave you." I wasn't good enough for his abuse. I deserved far worse. (Acording to him) I don't know how to have a relationship with the divine now.
I understand this, I was in a relationship with a man I believe was a psychopath for 8 years, from 16-24 years old still affects my relationships today😭😓I still want someone to take care of me, but with these videos I have been working on changing to healthier behavior.
A life of servitude. Got me in the feels. I’m the fixer. I’m the rescuer, the indentured servant. I’m exhausted. Yet I never feel I have the right to set a boundary if others have needs! I cannot tell you how relieved I am that you were the same. My mother is the child of an alcoholic father and a codependent. She’s the fixer with almost zero boundaries. A huge weight has been lifted off me knowing I can say what I need, I can set a boundary, and that it’s not my fault I’ve never known how to do this. You’re working miracles…50 yrs old and I’m pulled in so many directions on a daily basis that I function strictly for everyone I work with, live with, have relationships with and I’m drained.
I’m 53 this May, and I have always felt responsible for keeping everyone I know happy! I try to take care of everyone. Now I’m getting out of a narcissistic relationship and learning so much! 🙏
@Lisa👍👍 my ex-wife used to shame me about being a empathetic and that confused me great deal but since I started listening to Lisa's advices I found out that there is nothing wrong with me nowadays I am proud of my feelings and won't change them for anything I love being a good human being. Namaste 🙏
I must acknowledge you for providing so much free information to help guide us in this very difficult journey. Coming into the realization of the deep effect of codependency also correlates to financial struggle for many of us and to know that a lifeline is available that is not going to drain my survival resources is a gift and miracle. Thank you and I appreciate it with my life.
I am still People pleasing! Where the Narcs caught my main fears is that I am deeply scared to be homeless on the streets, with a cruel man, without money, etc! That’s what they play with!
I remember when my nephew was 3 years old and his mother was trying to get him to do a dance he started crying because he didn't want to fell in her arms and told her she was embarrassing him, I remember being amazed that he express that. If I had done that when his age, I would be ignored, spanked, or reprimanded and told to do it anyway. AND my nephew's parents are both narcissistic. Twists the mind.
How wonderful to finally meet someone who knows what it is like to feel nothing, simply because you were not allowed to feel what you felt. I finally feel understood !! Thank you so so much!
Lisa, when you say the words “dear ones”, somehow the mere words touch me to my core. Whatever it is, I feel loved, treasured, cherished, comforted, and sort of “held” in that moment. Thank you for the work you do. Finding your videos has been a Godsend. May God continue to richly bless you.
This video is so very true, ive been fixing for years supporting my.kids emotionally and financially, was married for27,years to covert, narcisst, then on the rebound met an overt narccist but I finished after 3,and half years, I thought it was the real thing, but it crumbled.
You are a true inspiration in every way and because of your videos I discovered that I was a co-dependant my whole life without knowing that I was. And I am an empath too. This is truly a revelation for sure. And discovering self love at 50 plus is the best thing that ever happened to me. Knowing self is truly the key to freedom and happiness within. I can say that now I know how to heal thyself in its entirety true LOVE for SELF is a matter of course. Thank you Lisa and One Love.
WOW ! This video is a treasure trove of awesome extremely helpful information ! I am a very super super ultra sensitive empath & my mom is an extremely damaging narcissistic phycological warfare game expert who stops at Absolutely Nothing ! I have about 30 of your best videos under my belt, watched multiple times, your meditation is awesome, still makes me cry, I shall keep moving forward, keep picking different videos & keep learning & perhaps some day I will be able to save up the money to take the 12 week course I really so want to accomplish ❤️ ! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH LISA ❤️ !
Oh my, I am so thankful I’ve found you and your videos RE codependency. I’m in counseling now, but I think you just took 3 months off of the work that needed to be done. Thank you for sharing your God given gift. I appreciate you beyond what words can communicate. God bless you. 🕊🙏🏼🌹
Thank you so much. You, Dr Carter & Dr Laura have led me on a life changing path in which I am feeling stronger in myself than ever before. Thank you❣️🙏💪🙌
Lisa, you sure are our breakthrough and awesome teacher and coach! As a senior now, thanks to you, I’m finally going to connect to and prioritize loving care for my Inner Child. instead of directing myself to continue adding to her pain by choosing to focus on the suffering and injustice of the abused in this world, I will finally tend to her and honor my own body and inner feelings and all the fear and anxiety in me. I anticipate Healing and deeper Recovery and Blossoming- for all of us! More Consciousness as we practice alignment with with our Divine Being…. Deep thanks.
Lisa Romano has lived through all of this and came out the other end with diligent self work on releasing inner child wounding that resulted in reprogramming her belief system that ultimately made her an outstanding teacher to help others recover 👏 Thank you for helping all souls return back to themselves ❤
Same thing is true for adult children of fundamental radical religion upbringing. The programming coming from that causes a lifetime of guilt, bad choices and complete sacrifice of the self!
i was so hurt by the shunning i got from the flying monkeys of the naricissist in a poor yet toxic so-called "community" that i started going to Church. At church i let people know that I am a "recovering Catholic" so that they were not sure how to deal with me. While there were some genuinely charitable people at that small church; i had to let go of the guy who thought he knew more than i do about myself. I'm beginning to perceive narcissism personalities everywhere so that i protect my solitude & proceed with much more caution when trying to get to know some people better.
@@dianedeclare8541 I also tried going back to church as a recovering Baptist (similar dogma as Catholics). I only found that I was re-triggered by many of the personalities in that environment. I now connect with my spirituality through my own reading and prayers.
@@wiser1254 As a young teen, trail riding thru the woods on a borrowed pony was my escape and spiritual place. Church was a negative trigger for me. I just didn't fit anywhere. Isolation kept me from learning much needed communication skills. Thanks to Lisa and others in this community, t seems like a safe place to learn. Peace🌠
I have a scary messy cellar in my heart where for many many years I d hear scary noises that would make me physically sick and yet I woud be fearful to open the door to see what s up there.Thanks for holding my hand and coming to there with me.I like when u touch every single damn item and show me what it is and what is not.I am not fearfull anymore to accept the reality of the cellar of my heart.I am ready to clean it up and make it stay spectacular.I am divorcing my sadnees my fears and heart breaks,to be able to embrace my new self.
After go no contact with NPD parents, I get to know a stanger who just sit there and listen to me. Now that stranger become my only friend and family like to me. I still have codependentcy but it not that hard anymore.
Dr Lisa Romano, Thank You so much for finally giving me the clarity I have been craving all these years! and explaining in clear terms what has happened to Me and why I am the way i am... i have spent thousands on counsellors and Psychologists, trying to get answers and help, and at first I did hold back 'out of shame, and the shame is not on me it is on them, my parents and my whole messed up family dynamic of abuses and dysfunction ! in this one video, i learned more than in all those hours of wasted sessions .Thank you,
Thank you for putting this compilation together. Great summary and reminder after watching other videos and taking the course. Staying on the path. Best wishes to you Lisa.
Being a recovering addict I've been fortunate enough to be introduced to your videos. All I can say is wow! Everything you talk about just hits home. I've become aware of my empathic abilities. The hardest thing for me has been dealing with my own codependency issues and the feeling of being afraid to be alone. This all started after the passing of my wife nearly 4 yrs ago. While I believed I was codependent I still thought that u just had too much love to give to the right person but unfortunately they just never turned out to be that. The expectations that I would find someone who could love me as much as I love has caused nothing but resentments for me. Listening to you has helped clear this up. I need to love myself before I can love anyone else.
Re: Empathy for inner child. I am an off the chart empath, only learned this recently, super super codependent, also only recently learned what that truly means, thanks in large part to your videos. I'm also super super Pisces lol. I can't watch TV, news, movies, cartoons, hear others talk about stories even. I have always been that way. Since childhood, so my inner child would have that same issue right? So would having empathy for my inner child if I were to be watching the news for instance, go something like this? Instead of connecting with the victim I see on the news, and feeling what they feel and all that goes along with that, I should focus on my inner child the same as I would if I had a young empathic real child in the room. Turn it off because it's not appropriate for them at their age to see such traumatic situations. Then try and calm and soothe my inner child's feelings in regards to seeing it. I'm not sure what that would look like 100%, but am I getting the concept?
Wow! So helpful! All my life I thought it my duty to take in the pain and suffering of the victims of abuse and injustice! Unknowingly and beneath the veil of consciousness, I was restimulating and probably adding to the suffering and pain of my Inner Child. So she still truly needs my recognition and love and loving care! Deep thanks to Lisa and all of us…
@Gwyddion Flint I'm glad you felt comfortable expressing your opinion. I would have agreed with you probably at one point in my life, and everyone around me that made me feel that way. Not that I knew what an empath was. I would have dutifully carried on with life repressing and ignoring everything that was happening in my life. I would have continued on being as normal and useful as possible. Continued on thinking I was crazy and dramatic and fighting against everything I felt, everything I knew. Regards of if it was always right, regardless of everything at all. Life didn't allow that for me. Magic, yes, that's the perfect word for me, my thinking and everything else. Simply magic.
These are soo valuable....teachings to have empathy for my inner child first by living a healthy mindset, rewriting my narrative...now i have tools to DO.
OH MY THIS ENDED UP BEING QUITE LONG...hope it goes through or at least you read it Lisa. Lisa, you are my go to person to listen to narcissistic videos. Why? Because you are fiery, you share your passion in your voice, you speak loud and clear. You have been there, you have done that,, you are authentic and your personal stories are the best way for us out here to resonate have trust in you you are us. I am now separated from a narcissistic husband [3rd] and I had a narcissistic grandfather that made me his favorite. And I am and was the fiery girl too, Lisa, and had to spend decades putting up with not just men but women criticizing me, telling me to calm down [which of course the narcissists say: I am also a first mother [birthmother to some people] that lost a child to adoption when in trauma, no support to keep her; at that point I was almost comatose with suicidal tendencies, so I live with disenfranchised grief, severe sexual trauma [3 rapes and molestation at home]. I AM A THRIVER, yes my fire has kept my spirit burning, but why should any of us HAVE to do this? It's time to stop this and so your work and others IS so important: REVEALING and not covering up this now worldwide illness; [I am a professional astrologer now for 4 decades working with people to accept their energies, their amazing beautiful I am not a victim, but I was victimized. And astrology found me and saved me like so many people and healing modalities did because I've always searched to stay in recovery; I already have had decades of codependency recovery and still I want to share with others [and I'm sure you have] this is one day at a time and can be a lifetime of recovery., not a fix. Okay I want to keep sharing and sharing and sharing, but I want to get to the actual point of why I came on here to comment. Today I am listening to one of your videos about codependency and for the first time I was disappointed because you brought up god and religion, your beliefs about how we are all children of god or born in his likeness? Not verbatim. And I understand this IS your belief. When I am seeking support about my grief and trauma and then a 'support' person, a therapist or a counselor or a guide -whoever- brings up their personal beliefs about religion and adds it to the mix of healing to encourage a sense of love for ourselves, a sense of goodness, it makes NO sense to me and it feels like propaganda, a selling point. Religion is a deeply personal thing. I am not atheist, I do believe that LOVE is the higher power and I believe that the infant is pure born into a sick world. And I think that religion has been at the foundation of many wars and violence. And we see this now more than ever. I'm wondering if you can hear this and perhaps reconsider sharing in that way when so many people who are not raised with the religious language, the rituals at church, etc.are not remotely connected to this. And I think anyone born into religion without a choice, cannot undo necessarily that deeply rooted belief; it is 'taught' from birth if you are in a very religious family, there is baptism and so forth. And I am highly triggered by the fact that the churches are heavily responsible for child rape. I am highly triggered by people telling me 'it's gods will' 'god loves you' 'you are in the hands of god' 'have a blessed day god is with us'......I want to be accepting and respectful about someone's beliefs and need for religion in their lives. In your private life you have every right of course to practice your beliefs, but I really hope you will consider keeping them out of our healing work because I do not believe I am a child of a god. I believe I am a child conceived by two emotionally immature people craving to get away from their own dysfunctional families and found one another, had 4 children in a row by age 23 and while brilliant beautiful people, their wounds translated to us and we basically raised each other. Dysfunctional families continue on from one generation until another as you well know and SO THAT'S why this work is even more important to bring OUT and not deny. Still, I see in my own 4 children [my adopted daughter found me at age 25 and finally I knew she was alive] their inherited codependence and struggles. It's unreal this worldwide wounding of the soul and spirit. THANK YOU SO MUCH LISA FOR BEING my guide and ongoing reminder of my reality and that I absolutely must continue in recovery.
This is so sad. Everyone has a choice. If u choose to Listen to Lisa then take what u need and leave the rest. Your post is actually a trigger for me. Aren't you doing the very thing that u and all of us hate? Instead of praising God for leading us to her and 100% can agree Wow! This is diff than others...and accept her as a whole...good,bad,etc. Why do u think we are all having to heal? Bc somebody in our life didnt just accept us and always trying to change us to conform to what they like, or what makes them comfortable etc. She is adorable and has been through so much. Can we just take a moment and Love her as a whole and not try to call her out and let her know what I feel she needs to do or be? Come on...if we choose to watch her dedicated, long hours, committed, to help us wounded people, then please dont do the very thing that she is teaching us to stop allowing. We love her as a whole! She is a child of God called and anointed in helping to bring healing to the broken hearted! I pray that you accept the Lord Jesus b4 it's to late. I get it, u have been through alot! But come on, let's do this together no criticism on changing others to make u feel comfortable. The reason she speaks of the Lord and her beliefs is bc nobody and I mean nobody can make her change her thoughts about our Lord after what he has personally helped her and her children to escape. Much love...just consider. .if still no understanding her belief or view, their is many programs of self help that will leave the Lord out of it, and may help u to feel comfortable but definitely will not help you to feel free. It's time to make a choice, and be proud of ur decision, that's why our soldiers have fought for our freedoms of free speech!😘
Thank you a thousand times for your advice. I need to have empathy for my inner child instead of being affected by the sad news happening around the world. I need to practice that daily. Be blessed!
Thank you SO much for you educating us. This psychology must be a mandatory subject in ALL high schools. We would have less mass shootings and less mentally sick young people.
I love your Ten Commandament for Codependants! Absolutely great and to be implemented from now on. Codependency is basically putting false gods before the God who is our creator and that is basically living a life of a zombie - a hellish kind of experience. Thank you for your incredibly helpful assistence and support on my healing journey Lisa.
Its made me broken 💔 😢 but I am going to feel the feelings and acknowledge them . Accept that I feel it don't get angry for feeling the pain. I've been getting coucilling once we but wen she gone im in bits. My minds thoughts are coming g against me if I feel hurt or triggered By what I see. My awareness is so high since 19yrs old I went to a treatment place to learn about behaviours in addition and it showed me everything my mother was doing me. She groomed me since a child. My twin sister would be allowed do as she pls but me I was like a prisoner. I got 58,000euro at 18yrs old my family used me the money was gone 7months and then my mother didn't want me there cause I could see the damage she done to me .
👍🏽👍🏽 WONDERFUL TEACHING! I learn from every class! Oh, I AM one of those people who frets about the birds an squirrel nests when branches are coming off, an codependent..I'm you 48 year newbie 🙏 I thank God for sending me to you. Bless you and all in recovery, yes Facebook friends. You🤝 💖
OMG and you are a Pisces too! No freakin wonder so much you say resonates with me! So many things you talk about are so similar to what I think about but I have a hard time putting my thoughts into words (developing my throat chakra) then you say it and I am like YES that is what is in my brain! LOL
these are great videos, I need to watch more. I just went out with a narcissist with BPD. I've been out with one before for 6 years. Getting out of those games was near impossible - the lovebombing, gaslighting, the push pull games etc.. devaluation, control/power, enmeshing, baiting/guilt etc... For the 6 year her mom beat her, dad left then and mom abandoned her. I was her emotional punching bag. She loved calling the cops for power/control. Mess in the basement, call the police - sir you have to leave. Then she would call me back a few days later. Of course I'd be crawling back thinking it was all my fault appologizing. It was all a control/power game. Then this 6 month, she enticed me in with fantasy island - lets get a place together, where are we going on the honeymoon, etc... just a month in. Cirus act sex like 0 boundaries with odd stuff like candles etc... a form of self destruction really. Addictions really showed their face (alcohol, drugs, sex etc...) and she said "come meet my friends at the local bar". Then her kids in huge debt, she spending foolishly (who spends 6k on a bedframe and doesn't really have a stable house). Her previous husband she married when she was 28 he was 50 (some high flying car dealership guy), they went bankrupt twice! it was a complete circus show. I get there after her saying, come live with me only to find her young adult kids living with her and a nasty dog that would bite everyone. Then the dog attacked me, conflict brewed out of that end of fantasy island. Who gets blamed/shamed - me! she even called the cops (a narcissist will destroy someone financially, legally (cop calling as a means of control/power), emotionally and or physically - she even sicked her friends on me!). It was an odd relationship. It took weeks to get over - didn't eat, didn't sleep, headaches, stomach pains, sciatica, in the fog etc... like a recovering herion addict I was (serotin, dopamine, etc..). RUN IF YOU ENCOUNTER THESE PEOPLE!!! JUST RUN!!! not worth the pain and turmoil. (for her, her dad was shot by an uncle at age 3 then mom left to come to canada abondoned them then she was sexually assualted etc...) All that pain she had, she tore a piece off of me with her baggage. JUST RUN!!!
Thank you for your explanation....this helped me alot..i am most definitely codependent and empathic.both and my mother and grandmother were like this as well and i realized i patterned their behavior. I am working to heal myself but thank you soo much for sharing this knowledge 🙏 i will use it to take some steps forward
I used to love going to Mass as a boy...it was the only place I believed I could be heard by God. Then puberty hit...and that was the end of it being a survivor of co-dependant behaviour and narcissistic imposed rules I could no longer be subjected to by my father. Lisa Romano is like going to church...in that I hear a person who is walking the path...very much what a religious is deemed to do...as their journey through life...and when you hear truth being spoken...it is so different from rehashed theories and ideas. Thats how I'm describing what I understand spiritual guidance is like as crudely as I'm trying to explain it here!
Another great video Lisa. Yes I'm still here working through my healing. Don't think I can do it without you. I therefore keep in touch with your videos to reinforce what I have to do to continue my healing journey! Thank you❤
❤️ thank you Lisa ❤️ for creating this wonderful video ❤️ and ❤️giving me some tools to use to change my life ❤️. This is ❤️a powerful message ❤️. ❤️I really need this ❤️video today ❤️. I wish that I knew how to let go of negativity and abusive.
Thank you for putting this into words. It is easier for me to figure things out and make changes when I know what is there. When there is chaos, it is like a mental and emotional tornado or blender. Not knowing the items in that storm. You are slowing this swirling mess for me. Slowly sorting through and learning what is in there and which pile each belongs in. So much needs to be pulled out and shredded! I have had some serious concussion injuries. The last one was the most terrifying and still affects me - super emotional/cry a lot, anger out of the blue, vision going blurry, hard time organizing things etc. If there is frontal lobe damage, is there hope for me in making the changes?
I’ve done the inner child work and I’m in a CODA group. It’s so slow going. I’m losing hope of ever finding real love from the male species or even if I’m capable of an honest relationship when it comes to men, I’ve always been happier alone ( isolating ) Change is not easy ( but I didn’t know it was going to be so hard.
I absolutely LOVE all your work! An when I FINALLY found out I was an have been codependent an also an empath my whole life, but u have taught me how to let go of the feeling of needing to save my soon to be ex husband (who is a covert Narcissist) I now own my own feelings an now an slowly healing! ❤️ Thank you again! An btw….. I LOVE UR HAIR COLOUR! 😘
I am an adult survivor of child abuse. Raised in the madness of biker club houses. Watchin every evil thing even the unimaginable evil. I am moving to a higher vibrational state and can feel the change inside me. I am co-dependant and have many character defects. The spiritual evolvement inside me is happening so fast. I don't know what to say it feels like I am becoming triumphant, but also heartbreaking at the same time. Does that make sense?
My mom was a co dependant to 2 narcissist partners one of them my father thust he was only around for the first 6 months of my life...my stepfather was so abusive she lost herself. the children stumbled through 20 yrs of abuse and than.. she died of every diseeas known to man i believe caused by those chemicals produced by the constant anxiety in her body for years...Now i carry the stigma of an Empath both good and bad iam stuck in this cycle...i stopped dating for 6 years knowing as much as i do about narcissist and than i got snared again!!!! Iam now planning my escape and hope i heal or never date again.....
Is it common to see narcissistic characteristics in several people in my life…including myself? I realize that being able to see it in myself an knowing that I need to make changes is a good sign that I’m not a full on narcissist, because I also have codependent qualities too. It’s a bit overwhelming to take a good hard look at myself, my life, and the people in it. I tend to attract needy people and then resent those needy people…it’s a nasty cycle that I must change! I have a lot of work to do but I feel more empowered to do so while watching your videos.
Thank you Lisa for this video & others. I somehow became a co-dependent, probably have been throughout my life; that & being too nice, polite, friendly. I admit I have had my times of rage & anger mainly as a reaction from being stuck in this co-dependent cycle & needing honesty. My enthusiasm for life was ruined because of co-dependency. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, is it too much to want to be loved back & spend time time with the man that says he loves me but never wants me around. Yet he won't tell me why my presence (as with others) disgusts him so much.
Sorry Riri Star, so sorry that he sounds like a narcissist, an energy vampire, perhaps. Please do take care and believe in your hard earned recovery work to liberate you from codependency. You’re truly worth it!
Thank you for taking time to respond@@Joyous765. I hope you are well & never have to deal with such-yes we go through all sorts but I hope it is less than you can handle. I appreciate you.
I'm loving your videos. I'm also a pisces 😍 I left an abusive relationship with my narc of an ex after 12+ years together. It's been 3 years, and he is still doing everything in his power to make my life a living hell. We have 4children together. My question is, how, or can you, successfully co-parent with somebody like this? And how do you 'reprogram' or reparent children after years of living in a toxic household. Sadly, this is all my children have ever known. I want the cycle to stop here. I am especially worried about our oldest son (11yrs). I see so many toxic traits popping up from him. He reminds me of his father, and it scares me! As much as I need healing, so do my children. I don't know where to start😩
That baby experiment is how my mom was my whole life! I’m now 75 and have never had anyone show me genuine love. As an unconscious codependent, I have always felt that to be my responsibility. I certainly know better now, but I have no desire to even attempt another relationship. Just spending my remaining years as my authentic self will be comfort enough!
I am sorry. The only love that I have ever known was from my grandmother. You have an inspiring spirit.
@@taylorpresley4604 My grandparents were not loving either, which probably explains my parents. But I thank God he gave me a good inner spirit which ultimately helped me survive and now thrive. Prayers for you on your journey!
@@wiser1254 It is interesting that I wrote that statement one day ago and I became real honest with myself and I think perhaps my grandmother may have been a narc too. I just have a few clues that she was possibly but I really think she probably was. As much as truth hurts it is still much better than living in denial. Jesus said the truth sets us free and that is so true.
@@wiser1254 Prayers for your journey too!
@@taylorpresley4604 you are NEVER alone. The love and protection of Christ is always with you. I would never marry again (if I get out of my current situation) the apostle Paul had it right......
I like that. We have the DNA of God. Never thought of it that way. That is very empowering..
Empath/codependent here. I used to walk into my Zumba class and feel almost immediately who was upset, in distress or having problems. I used to ask myself, why do I have to feel all this, and why do I feel it is my business/responsibility? It was a short time later I discovered the man I was married to was showing behaviors that frightened me. I subsequently went into therapy, discovered that I was married to a covert narcissist, and divorced him. Thanks to your videos, I have been able to heal on a much deeper level.
@@darlene3747 Don’t process their feelings-only yours! Hear what they’re saying, acknowledge it, breathe, and then feel what you’re feeling and respond in terms of what you want and need-not what they want and need.
Great to hear a success story! TY for giving us the impetus to keep going. Peace🌠🌄
Oh this happens to me too.
Since I'm a child.🤔
@@wiser1254 thanks im doing this now as I've been trying save others pain instead of my pain not any more.
I'm infj and its so hard but its a blessing too.
God bless u all.
My parents were neither alcoholics nor drug addicts. They were lovely people who were not capable of connecting emotionally with me. However, that was enough to do the "work". I forgive them for this was the best they could do with the consciousness they had and now I take the responsibility to work on me and create the best version of myself!
After watching one of your many wonderful videos a truth was presented to me. I asked myself when will my depression and anxiety would go away. My inner self said, "when I can accept things as they are and not the way I want them to be." Truth. Thank you so much Lisa for all your videos and truth. You are truly a Godsend and maybe I am being selfish in saying this but I am glad you becoming a nurse didn't work out because God has used you in a powerful way to spread healing and truth. Mankind needs emotional healing just as much as physical healing.
How did you heal depression?
@@SA-px3ln I pray, work on my belief system, exercise, eat healthy, and get enough rest/
Amen. Taylor, well praising of Lisa’s God sent teachings.
I have read books regarding codependency, but they have never reached me like Lisa has…
In fact, I have listened this video 3 times, just so it can stick better in my brain and each time I listen to it, I get something more out of it.
Your hair is beautiful but more importantly God has blessed you. I appreciate your straightforward no bs explanations you helped me so much
I Agreeee,Tiffany.....She's "Definitely A God Send" !!! Narc Survivor Mr. Derrick l. Dukes 🎏🦍🎏↗️↗️↗️
The concept of me not being my thoughts or feelings was a revelation to me. I want to learn more on that. Thank you!
Still confusing to me but I want to learn so I will get it
She's nailed it for me
I highly recommend Lisa's program, I'm on week 4 and I feel great from the knowledge and empowerment.
@@CarolineLamarche to
@@Jans-critiques47 a
This is exactly how I feel !.....my parents only accepted this sentence " everything's okay" and I married a verbally and emotionally abusive person when I was 18 years old, and as I started to become so unhappy I would tell my parents about it and they listened and cared, but then said "well will go back to it you know you'll be okay" so I learned to minimize and disregard because I'm supposed to just keep "everything okay" I basically lived my life my whole life I'm 62 years old !! lived making sure my mother thought that "everything was fine with me" when it never was
Lots of people do. It hurts A LOT...like A WHOLE LOT to know you've wasted YEARS with someone that didn't love you, they just loved what you did for them. Whatever need they had. I was a one stop shop myself. Whether it was comforting, a sex toy, a punching bag, a sounding board for rage, a scapegoat, or an indentured servant, I was the IPPS(Intimate Partner Primary Source) and nothing more. Of course I had an alcoholic father and a codependent mother, so I got all kinds of personality disorders from them and her. Being both an empath AND codependent is like a unicorn steak for a narcissist. I couldn't ever leave because I loved her and would feel guilty. I spent YEARS thinking if maybe I just did or said(insert any of a million things here) she wouldn't be so unhappy and angry. It'll take YEARS of therapy before I can recover.
Thank you for this. I had great parents and a great childhood but got involved in a relationship with an actual psychopath who almost killed me 3 times he completely destroyed my soul and I do believe it rewired my brain because it was from the ages of 18 to 26 and your brain isn’t even done developing until you are 25. The effects of his abuse are affecting me to this day.
I married a psychopath too. He almost killed me twice. I still struggle 31 years later.
I was in a relationship with a narcissist from ages 16 to 24. My brain developed within and under that abuse, didn't physically try to kill me but I wasn't allowed to live, and I needed to be willing to give my life for him. He was very happy I was willing to let him hit me and would say " Praise God, anyone else would hit you/leave you." I wasn't good enough for his abuse. I deserved far worse. (Acording to him) I don't know how to have a relationship with the divine now.
@@teenychristinee Thank you for your kind words. :) Stay strong 💕
I understand this, I was in a relationship with a man I believe was a psychopath for 8 years, from 16-24 years old still affects my relationships today😭😓I still want someone to take care of me, but with these videos I have been working on changing to healthier behavior.
I’m so sorry for what you had to endure. I hope you heal and find happiness again
A life of servitude. Got me in the feels. I’m the fixer. I’m the rescuer, the indentured servant. I’m exhausted. Yet I never feel I have the right to set a boundary if others have needs! I cannot tell you how relieved I am that you were the same. My mother is the child of an alcoholic father and a codependent. She’s the fixer with almost zero boundaries. A huge weight has been lifted off me knowing I can say what I need, I can set a boundary, and that it’s not my fault I’ve never known how to do this. You’re working miracles…50 yrs old and I’m pulled in so many directions on a daily basis that I function strictly for everyone I work with, live with, have relationships with and I’m drained.
I’m 53 this May, and I have always felt responsible for keeping everyone I know happy! I try to take care of everyone. Now I’m getting out of a narcissistic relationship and learning so much! 🙏
@Lisa👍👍 my ex-wife used to shame me about being a empathetic and that confused me great deal but since I started listening to Lisa's advices I found out that there is nothing wrong with me nowadays I am proud of my feelings and won't change them for anything I love being a good human being. Namaste 🙏
You are the BEST ON TH-cam on this topic. Lisa you are chosen! A true angel 🤩🤩🤩
I must acknowledge you for providing so much free information to help guide us in this very difficult journey. Coming into the realization of the deep effect of codependency also correlates to financial struggle for many of us and to know that a lifeline is available that is not going to drain my survival resources is a gift and miracle. Thank you and I appreciate it with my life.
I am still People pleasing! Where the Narcs caught my main fears is that I am deeply scared to be homeless on the streets, with a cruel man, without money, etc! That’s what they play with!
I remember when my nephew was 3 years old and his mother was trying to get him to do a dance he started crying because he didn't want to fell in her arms and told her she was embarrassing him, I remember being amazed that he express that. If I had done that when his age, I would be ignored, spanked, or reprimanded and told to do it anyway. AND my nephew's parents are both narcissistic. Twists the mind.
How wonderful to finally meet someone who knows what it is like to feel nothing, simply because you were not allowed to feel what you felt. I finally feel understood !! Thank you so so much!
Lisa, when you say the words “dear ones”, somehow the mere words touch me to my core. Whatever it is, I feel loved, treasured, cherished, comforted, and sort of “held” in that moment. Thank you for the work you do. Finding your videos has been a Godsend. May God continue to richly bless you.
This video is so very true, ive been fixing for years supporting my.kids emotionally and financially, was married for27,years to covert, narcisst, then on the rebound met an overt narccist but I finished after 3,and half years, I thought it was the real thing, but it crumbled.
You are a true inspiration in every way and because of your videos I discovered that I was a co-dependant my whole life without knowing that I was.
And I am an empath too. This is truly a revelation for sure. And discovering self love at 50 plus is the best thing that ever happened to me.
Knowing self is truly the key to freedom and happiness within. I can say that now I know how to heal thyself in its entirety true LOVE for SELF is a matter of course. Thank you Lisa and One Love.
WOW ! This video is a treasure trove of awesome extremely helpful information ! I am a very super super ultra sensitive empath & my mom is an extremely damaging narcissistic phycological warfare game expert who stops at Absolutely Nothing !
I have about 30 of your best videos under my belt, watched multiple times, your meditation is awesome, still makes me cry, I shall keep moving forward, keep picking different videos & keep learning & perhaps some day I will be able to save up the money to take the 12 week course I really so want to accomplish ❤️ !
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH LISA ❤️ !
I am a Pisces also! My birthday was St. Patrick's Day! I watch your videos daily---and they are helping me to heal! Oh, and I am an empath!
Pisces here too
@Who Dat Yes, We Pisces are a very feeling group of people!
Your content is life and sanity saving. I'm so grateful for you! ❤🙏
Oh my, I am so thankful I’ve found you and your videos RE codependency. I’m in counseling now, but I think you just took 3 months off of the work that needed to be done. Thank you for sharing your God given gift. I appreciate you beyond what words can communicate. God bless you. 🕊🙏🏼🌹
Thank you so much. You, Dr Carter & Dr Laura have led me on a life changing path in which I am feeling stronger in myself than ever before. Thank you❣️🙏💪🙌
Lisa, you sure are our breakthrough and awesome teacher and coach! As a senior now, thanks to you, I’m finally going to connect to and prioritize loving care for my Inner Child. instead of directing myself to continue adding to her pain by choosing to focus on the suffering and injustice of the abused in this world, I will finally tend to her and honor my own body and inner feelings and all the fear and anxiety in me. I anticipate Healing and deeper Recovery and Blossoming- for all of us! More Consciousness as we practice alignment with with our Divine Being…. Deep thanks.
Lisa Romano has lived through all of this and came out the other end with diligent self work on releasing inner child wounding that resulted in reprogramming her belief system that ultimately made her an outstanding teacher to help others recover 👏
Thank you for helping all souls return back to themselves ❤
You r a very good teacher!!! And I appreciate that you share your experience, strength and hope!!! You r REAL!!!!
You’re gifting myself and your viewers with such a beautiful combo of spirituality and practicality.
✨Thank you✨
Same thing is true for adult children of fundamental radical religion upbringing. The programming coming from that causes a lifetime of guilt, bad choices and complete sacrifice of the self!
i was so hurt by the shunning i got from the flying monkeys of the naricissist in a poor yet toxic so-called "community" that i started going to Church. At church i let people know that I am a "recovering Catholic" so that they were not sure how to deal with me. While there were some genuinely charitable people at that small church; i had to let go of the guy who thought he knew more than i do about myself. I'm beginning to perceive narcissism personalities everywhere so that i protect my solitude & proceed with much more caution when trying to get to know some people better.
@@dianedeclare8541 I also tried going back to church as a recovering Baptist (similar dogma as Catholics). I only found that I was re-triggered by many of the personalities in that environment. I now connect with my spirituality through my own reading and prayers.
@@wiser1254 As a young teen, trail riding thru the woods on a borrowed pony was my escape and spiritual place. Church was a negative trigger for me. I just didn't fit anywhere. Isolation kept me from learning much needed communication skills. Thanks to Lisa and others in this community, t seems like a safe place to learn. Peace🌠
Omgosh yes!
#narcissistic #narcissist #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissism #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #gaslighting #sociopath #emotionalabuse #toxicrelationships #narcissisticmother #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissists #toxicpeople #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticparent #narcissistsurvivor #abuse #psychologicalabuse #covertnarcissist #toxicrelationship #healing #psychopath #narcissisticandemotionalabuse #empath #npd #narcissisticrelationship #mentalhealth #narcissistrecovery #lisaaromano #codependencyrecovery #stoplivingforothers
I have a scary messy cellar in my heart where for many many years I d hear scary noises that would make me physically sick and yet I woud be fearful to open the door to see what s up there.Thanks for holding my hand and coming to there with me.I like when u touch every single damn item and show me what it is and what is not.I am not fearfull anymore to accept the reality of the cellar of my heart.I am ready to clean it up and make it stay spectacular.I am divorcing my sadnees my fears and heart breaks,to be able to embrace my new self.
Blessings and more power to you! One love…
If I try to defend myself I'm in for it. I'm in for anger, the cold shoulder and emotional insecurity. It won't end anything.
After go no contact with NPD parents, I get to know a stanger who just sit there and listen to me. Now that stranger become my only friend and family like to me. I still have codependentcy but it not that hard anymore.
Dr Lisa Romano, Thank You so much for finally giving me the clarity I have been craving all these years! and explaining in clear terms what has happened to Me and why I am the way i am... i have spent thousands on counsellors and Psychologists, trying to get answers and help, and at first I did hold back 'out of shame, and the shame is not on me it is on them, my parents and my whole messed up family dynamic of abuses and dysfunction ! in this one video, i learned more than in all those hours of wasted sessions .Thank you,
Thank You Lisa ✨💜✨
this is why al-lanon is so healing
Thank you for putting this compilation together. Great summary and reminder after watching other videos and taking the course. Staying on the path. Best wishes to you Lisa.
Being a recovering addict I've been fortunate enough to be introduced to your videos. All I can say is wow! Everything you talk about just hits home. I've become aware of my empathic abilities. The hardest thing for me has been dealing with my own codependency issues and the feeling of being afraid to be alone. This all started after the passing of my wife nearly 4 yrs ago. While I believed I was codependent I still thought that u just had too much love to give to the right person but unfortunately they just never turned out to be that. The expectations that I would find someone who could love me as much as I love has caused nothing but resentments for me. Listening to you has helped clear this up. I need to love myself before I can love anyone else.
We need to choose our battles. Not every word directed to us deserves our attention. 🌈 yes we need to keep our peace.
Re: Empathy for inner child. I am an off the chart empath, only learned this recently, super super codependent, also only recently learned what that truly means, thanks in large part to your videos. I'm also super super Pisces lol. I can't watch TV, news, movies, cartoons, hear others talk about stories even. I have always been that way. Since childhood, so my inner child would have that same issue right? So would having empathy for my inner child if I were to be watching the news for instance, go something like this? Instead of connecting with the victim I see on the news, and feeling what they feel and all that goes along with that, I should focus on my inner child the same as I would if I had a young empathic real child in the room. Turn it off because it's not appropriate for them at their age to see such traumatic situations. Then try and calm and soothe my inner child's feelings in regards to seeing it. I'm not sure what that would look like 100%, but am I getting the concept?
Thanks so much for this very inspiring discussion. I truly appreciate this
Wow! So helpful! All my life I thought it my duty to take in the pain and suffering of the victims of abuse and injustice!
Unknowingly and beneath the veil of consciousness, I was restimulating and probably adding to the suffering and pain of my Inner Child. So she still truly needs my recognition and love and loving care! Deep thanks to Lisa and all of us…
@Gwyddion Flint I'm glad you felt comfortable expressing your opinion. I would have agreed with you probably at one point in my life, and everyone around me that made me feel that way. Not that I knew what an empath was. I would have dutifully carried on with life repressing and ignoring everything that was happening in my life. I would have continued on being as normal and useful as possible. Continued on thinking I was crazy and dramatic and fighting against everything I felt, everything I knew. Regards of if it was always right, regardless of everything at all. Life didn't allow that for me. Magic, yes, that's the perfect word for me, my thinking and everything else. Simply magic.
@@justglitter k
I thank Jesus for lisa
These are soo valuable....teachings to have empathy for my inner child first by living a healthy mindset, rewriting my narrative...now i have tools to DO.
OH MY THIS ENDED UP BEING QUITE LONG...hope it goes through or at least you read it Lisa.
Lisa, you are my go to person to listen to narcissistic videos. Why? Because you are fiery, you share your passion in your voice, you speak loud and clear. You have been there, you have done that,, you are authentic and your personal stories are the best way for us out here to resonate have trust in you you are us. I am now separated from a narcissistic husband [3rd] and I had a narcissistic grandfather that made me his favorite. And I am and was the fiery girl too, Lisa, and had to spend decades putting up with not just men but women criticizing me, telling me to calm down [which of course the narcissists say: I am also a first mother [birthmother to some people] that lost a child to adoption when in trauma, no support to keep her; at that point I was almost comatose with suicidal tendencies, so I live with disenfranchised grief, severe sexual trauma [3 rapes and molestation at home]. I AM A THRIVER, yes my fire has kept my spirit burning, but why should any of us HAVE to do this? It's time to stop this and so your work and others IS so important: REVEALING and not covering up this now worldwide illness; [I am a professional astrologer now for 4 decades working with people to accept their energies, their amazing beautiful I am not a victim, but I was victimized. And astrology found me and saved me like so many people and healing modalities did because I've always searched to stay in recovery; I already have had decades of codependency recovery and still I want to share with others [and I'm sure you have] this is one day at a time and can be a lifetime of recovery., not a fix. Okay I want to keep sharing and sharing and sharing, but I want to get to the actual point of why I came on here to comment. Today I am listening to one of your videos about codependency and for the first time I was disappointed because you brought up god and religion, your beliefs about how we are all children of god or born in his likeness? Not verbatim. And I understand this IS your belief. When I am seeking support about my grief and trauma and then a 'support' person, a therapist or a counselor or a guide -whoever- brings up their personal beliefs about religion and adds it to the mix of healing to encourage a sense of love for ourselves, a sense of goodness, it makes NO sense to me and it feels like propaganda, a selling point. Religion is a deeply personal thing. I am not atheist, I do believe that LOVE is the higher power and I believe that the infant is pure born into a sick world. And I think that religion has been at the foundation of many wars and violence. And we see this now more than ever. I'm wondering if you can hear this and perhaps reconsider sharing in that way when so many people who are not raised with the religious language, the rituals at church, etc.are not remotely connected to this. And I think anyone born into religion without a choice, cannot undo necessarily that deeply rooted belief; it is 'taught' from birth if you are in a very religious family, there is baptism and so forth. And I am highly triggered by the fact that the churches are heavily responsible for child rape. I am highly triggered by people telling me 'it's gods will' 'god loves you' 'you are in the hands of god' 'have a blessed day god is with us'......I want to be accepting and respectful about someone's beliefs and need for religion in their lives. In your private life you have every right of course to practice your beliefs, but I really hope you will consider keeping them out of our healing work because I do not believe I am a child of a god. I believe I am a child conceived by two emotionally immature people craving to get away from their own dysfunctional families and found one another, had 4 children in a row by age 23 and while brilliant beautiful people, their wounds translated to us and we basically raised each other. Dysfunctional families continue on from one generation until another as you well know and SO THAT'S why this work is even more important to bring OUT and not deny. Still, I see in my own 4 children [my adopted daughter found me at age 25 and finally I knew she was alive] their inherited codependence and struggles. It's unreal this worldwide wounding of the soul and spirit. THANK YOU SO MUCH LISA FOR BEING my guide and ongoing reminder of my reality and that I absolutely must continue in recovery.
This is so sad. Everyone has a choice. If u choose to Listen to Lisa then take what u need and leave the rest. Your post is actually a trigger for me. Aren't you doing the very thing that u and all of us hate? Instead of praising God for leading us to her and 100% can agree Wow! This is diff than others...and accept her as a whole...good,bad,etc. Why do u think we are all having to heal? Bc somebody in our life didnt just accept us and always trying to change us to conform to what they like, or what makes them comfortable etc.
She is adorable and has been through so much. Can we just take a moment and Love her as a whole and not try to call her out and let her know what I feel she needs to do or be? Come on...if we choose to watch her dedicated, long hours, committed, to help us wounded people, then please dont do the very thing that she is teaching us to stop allowing. We love her as a whole! She is a child of God called and anointed in helping to bring healing to the broken hearted!
I pray that you accept the Lord Jesus b4 it's to late. I get it, u have been through alot! But come on, let's do this together no criticism on changing others to make u feel comfortable. The reason she speaks of the Lord and her beliefs is bc nobody and I mean nobody can make her change her thoughts about our Lord after what he has personally helped her and her children to escape. Much love...just consider. .if still no understanding her belief or view, their is many programs of self help that will leave the Lord out of it, and may help u to feel comfortable but definitely will not help you to feel free. It's time to make a choice, and be proud of ur decision, that's why our soldiers have fought for our freedoms of free speech!😘
Thank you a thousand times for your advice. I need to have empathy for my inner child instead of being affected by the sad news happening around the world. I need to practice that daily. Be blessed!
Dear Lisa Romano, you're so wise and fully aware. Thanks a lot from me. Rome, Italy
I’m so glad I found your videos I’m a work in progress. Thank-you so much. I’m a Aries sensitive extrovert.
Thank you SO much for you educating us. This psychology must be a mandatory subject in ALL high schools. We would have less mass shootings and less mentally sick young people.
As always, I needed this
My wife is a huge help to everyone, as long as she can have it to hold over peoples heads and to tell everyone.
Yes Lisa, we are all G-d's children. He loves us. Going through tests and troubles can bring us the gift of being able to help others.
In all my years 64....I have felt that I shouldn't express how I feel to people who don't care about how I feel. Childhood and adult life.
I love your Ten Commandament for Codependants! Absolutely great and to be implemented from now on. Codependency is basically putting false gods before the God who is our creator and that is basically living a life of a zombie - a hellish kind of experience. Thank you for your incredibly helpful assistence and support on my healing journey Lisa.
Thank you, Lisa....your videos and books have opened my eyes, heart and soul....life changing.❤❤❤
Its made me broken 💔 😢 but I am going to feel the feelings and acknowledge them .
Accept that I feel it don't get angry for feeling the pain.
I've been getting coucilling once we but wen she gone im in bits.
My minds thoughts are coming g against me if I feel hurt or triggered
By what I see. My awareness is so high since 19yrs old I went to a treatment place to learn about behaviours in addition and it showed me everything my mother was doing me.
She groomed me since a child.
My twin sister would be allowed do as she pls but me I was like a prisoner.
I got 58,000euro at 18yrs old my family used me the money was gone 7months and then my mother didn't want me there cause I could see the damage she done to me .
Thanks very much Lisa, the help and support, and.encouragement is spot ❤ok
I'm often taken advantage of because I'm not sure if my feelings and thoughts are legit or a result of my life and upbringing?
This has been truly been groundbreaking for me. I cannot thank you enough for this important and vital information
👍🏽👍🏽 WONDERFUL TEACHING! I learn from every class! Oh, I AM one of those people who frets about the birds an squirrel nests when branches are coming off, an codependent..I'm you 48 year newbie 🙏 I thank God for sending me to you. Bless you and all in recovery, yes Facebook friends. You🤝 💖
OMG and you are a Pisces too! No freakin wonder so much you say resonates with me! So many things you talk about are so similar to what I think about but I have a hard time putting my thoughts into words (developing my throat chakra) then you say it and I am like YES that is what is in my brain! LOL
Morning lisa. I love your chats, some times I listen over and over. Love this particular one you have done.
I vigorously avoid malls, big box stores, large Costco bargain stores, large movie theaters - too many overwhelming intense energies.
Thank you. God bless you and all of you 🌎🙏❤️
these are great videos, I need to watch more. I just went out with a narcissist with BPD. I've been out with one before for 6 years. Getting out of those games was near impossible - the lovebombing, gaslighting, the push pull games etc.. devaluation, control/power, enmeshing, baiting/guilt etc... For the 6 year her mom beat her, dad left then and mom abandoned her. I was her emotional punching bag. She loved calling the cops for power/control. Mess in the basement, call the police - sir you have to leave. Then she would call me back a few days later. Of course I'd be crawling back thinking it was all my fault appologizing. It was all a control/power game. Then this 6 month, she enticed me in with fantasy island - lets get a place together, where are we going on the honeymoon, etc... just a month in. Cirus act sex like 0 boundaries with odd stuff like candles etc... a form of self destruction really. Addictions really showed their face (alcohol, drugs, sex etc...) and she said "come meet my friends at the local bar". Then her kids in huge debt, she spending foolishly (who spends 6k on a bedframe and doesn't really have a stable house). Her previous husband she married when she was 28 he was 50 (some high flying car dealership guy), they went bankrupt twice! it was a complete circus show. I get there after her saying, come live with me only to find her young adult kids living with her and a nasty dog that would bite everyone. Then the dog attacked me, conflict brewed out of that end of fantasy island. Who gets blamed/shamed - me! she even called the cops (a narcissist will destroy someone financially, legally (cop calling as a means of control/power), emotionally and or physically - she even sicked her friends on me!). It was an odd relationship. It took weeks to get over - didn't eat, didn't sleep, headaches, stomach pains, sciatica, in the fog etc... like a recovering herion addict I was (serotin, dopamine, etc..). RUN IF YOU ENCOUNTER THESE PEOPLE!!! JUST RUN!!! not worth the pain and turmoil. (for her, her dad was shot by an uncle at age 3 then mom left to come to canada abondoned them then she was sexually assualted etc...) All that pain she had, she tore a piece off of me with her baggage. JUST RUN!!!
Thank you for your explanation....this helped me alot..i am most definitely codependent and empathic.both and my mother and grandmother were like this as well and i realized i patterned their behavior. I am working to heal myself but thank you soo much for sharing this knowledge 🙏 i will use it to take some steps forward
You have helped me identify and put into words my experiences, my life! And why l feel the way l do! Thanks
I used to love going to Mass as a boy...it was the only place I believed I could be heard by God. Then puberty hit...and that was the end of it being a survivor of co-dependant behaviour and narcissistic imposed rules I could no longer be subjected to by my father. Lisa Romano is like going to church...in that I hear a person who is walking the path...very much what a religious is deemed to do...as their journey through life...and when you hear truth being spoken...it is so different from rehashed theories and ideas. Thats how I'm describing what I understand spiritual guidance is like as crudely as I'm trying to explain it here!
Thinking is not feeling. Wow that hurt......just wow. Hopefully I'm learning. Thank you! ❣
Working my way through this now. God bless you Lisa.
Im Codependent . 50 years old and only just figured out why Im burnt out.
God bless Lisa
Another great video Lisa. Yes I'm still here working through my healing. Don't think I can do it without you. I therefore keep in touch with your videos to reinforce what I have to do to continue my healing journey! Thank you❤
❤️ thank you Lisa ❤️ for creating this wonderful video ❤️ and ❤️giving me some tools to use to change my life ❤️. This is ❤️a powerful message ❤️. ❤️I really need this ❤️video today ❤️. I wish that I knew how to let go of negativity and abusive.
Thank you for your teaching. I feel better and stronger already 😘
This video is the most awsum oustanding replica of healing I have seen anywhere for codependency. Thank you Lisa.
Thank you for putting this into words. It is easier for me to figure things out and make changes when I know what is there. When there is chaos, it is like a mental and emotional tornado or blender. Not knowing the items in that storm. You are slowing this swirling mess for me. Slowly sorting through and learning what is in there and which pile each belongs in. So much needs to be pulled out and shredded! I have had some serious concussion injuries. The last one was the most terrifying and still affects me - super emotional/cry a lot, anger out of the blue, vision going blurry, hard time organizing things etc. If there is frontal lobe damage, is there hope for me in making the changes?
Try some cranial sacral work from a trained massage therapist. 🙏
Lisa! Yiu are empath and so so beautyfull woman! U are angel!!! ❤❤❤
I am so grateful I found Lisa! You say so many things that resonates with me. Thank you!❤
You are so welcome
I need this SO much right now....thank you LISA!!!!!🙏🏽❤️
Its amazing to just know that there are options. You've made my marriage much more tolerable and understood. Ty.
Crying over nests in trees! Yaaas! Im so glad I'm not alone
Lisa. We are not Gods. We are human and that is great!
No...you are right...we are not God's however, we are made in the image of God.
@@sandicampbell8626 absolutely.
So helpful! I’m also having all the physical symptoms: acne, belly troubles, hair loss, bumpy skin all over my body….and the list goes on.
Wow I’ve been watching for awhile and I’m also a Pisces and been through many things that you also have been through. Stay blessed and thank you ❤️
Pisces here too
Pisces here too
I’ve done the inner child work and I’m in a CODA group.
It’s so slow going. I’m losing hope of ever finding real love from the male species or even if I’m capable of an honest relationship when it comes to men,
I’ve always been happier alone ( isolating )
Change is not easy ( but I didn’t know it was going to be so hard.
I absolutely LOVE all your work! An when I FINALLY found out I was an have been codependent an also an empath my whole life, but u have taught me how to let go of the feeling of needing to save my soon to be ex husband (who is a covert Narcissist)
I now own my own feelings an now an slowly healing! ❤️
Thank you again! An btw….. I LOVE UR HAIR COLOUR! 😘
Love and appreciate you Lisa. You saved me.
I listened to the 10 commandments several times…really powerful! Thank you!!!
I am an adult survivor of child abuse. Raised in the madness of biker club houses. Watchin every evil thing even the unimaginable evil. I am moving to a higher vibrational state and can feel the change inside me. I am co-dependant and have many character defects. The spiritual evolvement inside me is happening so fast. I don't know what to say it feels like I am becoming triumphant, but also heartbreaking at the same time. Does that make sense?
Simply amazing thank you 🙏🏾
My mom was a co dependant to 2 narcissist partners one of them my father thust he was only around for the first 6 months of my life...my stepfather was so abusive she lost herself. the children stumbled through 20 yrs of abuse and than.. she died of every diseeas known to man i believe caused by those chemicals produced by the constant anxiety in her body for years...Now i carry the stigma of an Empath both good and bad iam stuck in this cycle...i stopped dating for 6 years knowing as much as i do about narcissist and than i got snared again!!!! Iam now planning my escape and hope i heal or never date again.....
This women has really helped me. (Lots of ads but all good ;)
Best Advice EVER 🙌💕
I love your channel thank u so much from my soul to yours! ❤❤
You are literally a lifesaver, Lisa ❤️
Yep needed this today 😊 💖
You're great, Lisa. Such an important voice. ♥️😀👍
You are wonderful Lisa 👍
I think we are All Sons & Daughters of God whether we acknowledge it or not
So sad from a upbringing of not there parents for there kids because of there own issues this is all so true. Ty for sharing very helpful information.
Super interesting point I’d never thought of... Adam & Atom...
Is it common to see narcissistic characteristics in several people in my life…including myself? I realize that being able to see it in myself an knowing that I need to make changes is a good sign that I’m not a full on narcissist, because I also have codependent qualities too. It’s a bit overwhelming to take a good hard look at myself, my life, and the people in it. I tend to attract needy people and then resent those needy people…it’s a nasty cycle that I must change! I have a lot of work to do but I feel more empowered to do so while watching your videos.
Thank you Lisa for this video & others. I somehow became a co-dependent, probably have been throughout my life; that & being too nice, polite, friendly. I admit I have had my times of rage & anger mainly as a reaction from being stuck in this co-dependent cycle & needing honesty.
My enthusiasm for life was ruined because of co-dependency. I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, is it too much to want to be loved back & spend time time with the man that says he loves me but never wants me around. Yet he won't tell me why my presence (as with others) disgusts him so much.
Sorry Riri Star, so sorry that he sounds like a narcissist, an energy vampire, perhaps. Please do take care and believe in your hard earned recovery work to liberate you from codependency. You’re truly worth it!
Thank you for taking time to respond@@Joyous765. I hope you are well & never have to deal with such-yes we go through all sorts but I hope it is less than you can handle. I appreciate you.
I'm loving your videos. I'm also a pisces 😍
I left an abusive relationship with my narc of an ex after 12+ years together. It's been 3 years, and he is still doing everything in his power to make my life a living hell. We have 4children together.
My question is, how, or can you, successfully co-parent with somebody like this? And how do you 'reprogram' or reparent children after years of living in a toxic household. Sadly, this is all my children have ever known. I want the cycle to stop here. I am especially worried about our oldest son (11yrs). I see so many toxic traits popping up from him. He reminds me of his father, and it scares me!
As much as I need healing, so do my children. I don't know where to start😩