Well yes. But I also would say it depends on the therapist and the used methode. Trauma, -art,-or Bodytrauma-therapies are good. But there are not so many out there or not payed by injurances. Even sometimes not from private ones. Strange though. Because all therapies where the body is involved and creativity etc., helps more than the only Blabla-therapy.
I got a better apartment, better paycheck, a little better clothes. My equivalent to staying in bad jobs, is a messy house. I have started decluttering and got a tremendous back pain. I understand that this pain is related to me starting to declutter. Because if I get rid of the clutter, then my excuse for not inviting friends home is gone, and I have to take accountability for my social life 😳 I am afraid, but I am sooo sick and tired of being sick and tired, I have to do this
relate. hard. also, find that when i begin to make headway and connection and small forays into interpersonal intimacy (not dating), i get nervous, uncertain, shut down after ... difficult to maintain friendships in current state.
I've done a lot of therapy over the years, tried antidepressants and even medically monitored ketamine (which pulled me out of a near catatonic depression). But I'm still much the same. Listening to you, I felt a light of hope turn. I'm in. Thank you! ❤
Honestly nothing worked for me just low contact and a very very slow boring life, writing, and surrounding myself with people I wish my parents had been
#1 00:49 Learn what CPTSD is. #2 1:22 Be willing to look at yourself and notice some of the issues that may have nothing to do with trauma. "Normal person problems" can be easier to solve. IE they are the low hanging fruit. #3 2:30 Prepare to move your stories about your trauma out of your looping-mind and into the "memory bucket." You will remember them but they won't trigger a physiological or neurological response. To do this, start to write about them, even just a little bit at a time. #4 3:52 Stop trying to make other people not trigger you. It's probably not possible anyway and the empowered approach is to learn to calm your own triggers. Then you become more perceptive and you develop "discernment:" IE is it just me or is this person a jerk?" When you can calm triggers and have more discernment you have more flexibility about where you can spend time. You will have better boundaries. #5 7:26 Stop trash talking the people you choose to have in your life. If you really want to heal stop using labels, and focus more on how you react/get troubled/get disregulated. Example: calling someone a narcissist. You don't have to keep them in your life, but focusing on yourself is your superpower. #6 9:04 Stop clinging to bad relationships that make you miserable. This doesn't mean you don't still attend to those relationships with obligations, duties, and financial complications. She means more like boyfriends and girlfriends who don't treat you well. #7 10:19 Don't stay in work that makes you miserable unless your life depends on it. If the paycheck is not the problem right now, ask yourself: "is being miserable at work the way I avoid facing responsibility for my life?" #8 12:20 Detatch from the belief that you passively or magically just attract bad people. Acknowledge that the issue is who *YOU* tolerate, date, sleep with... Work on your red flag detector. You are the gate keeper. IE "I attract mosquitoes but I don't marry them." #9 12:42 If you have addictive behaviors, make recovery your first priority. Alcohol, drugs, food, porn, spending etc. It's tempting to try to control or run away or seek oblivion. If you are using anything to escape life's ups and downs, you cannot recover from trauma. The path towards healing always involves facing what's going on. You need a means to handle what may come. That is true freedom. #10 15:41 Thought exercise: ask yourself "if I had to solve this problem what are 10 things I could do [in this case- to heal from cptsd]?
I’m so lucky that I have a psychologist that specialises in Trauma and mainly CPTSD. We are starting EMDR therapy. I always leave my session feeling validated and understood. She has vowed to help me overcome all of this and has even offered me a few free sessions. My birthday was in and May and she got me a small cake with a candle because she knows I have no one in my life. I got so lucky
52:30 CPTSD throws off brain chemistry, attention, hormones, immune system... every system in your body. And I'm here, telling my doctor's there HAS TO BE some kind of root of all of my problems. But they gaslight me and said: You're just unlucky. I was unlucky alright. But in a different way than they think.
As a health care practitioner it is so frustrating to see my clients going to drs psychologist psychiatrist all ignoring the fact that the trauma from childhood has impacted the biochemistry in the body leading to drug addiction leading to more biochemical imbalances Without any hope of recovery !! I CAN NOT ACCEPT THAT !! It’s why I’m on my mission of love to combine what I know to heal body mind soul ALL HAS to be addressed !! Including epigenetics from our previous generations ! It can be done there are safe effective fast techniques to help dissolve the core of cptsd without reliving the pain of the trauma like most therapies ! No wonder they don’t work .. long term.. they keep you in the problem of pain! Renewing the subconscious! How about changing our subconscious ., from our own wisdom not some therapist telling us what snd how we should think?!? Real ability to develop subconscious emotional intelligence !! ❤ through the ups downs! Never being STUCK again!! But healing from the heart!!
I also listen to her every night, I also love her soft voice. She is a soft speaker, and never raises her voice. Not only great material, but soothing to listen to. ❤
@@raiontheone we're all here with you, remind yourself every day you're not the only one going through this even if you can't see it in the people around you
I was told by a mental health nurse 3 years ago that there was no such thing as cptsd, even though it was recognised by the NHS. It's going to take years for health care systems to recognise this fully. You describe my life to a T and for the 1st time ever I feel understood. I am quite a way into my own recovery, following various paths, but it's dysregulation and discernment I have been stuck with which is was brought me to you. I've been doing the daily reflections. They've been really helpful and I'm sleeping properly again 🙏 I also realise that my mother projected this onto me, and I feel more compassion for her than I ever did before. But with a weary distance, I'm not falling for that again! Thank you for everything you have done so far 🙏
She is the most thorough, in depth, and on point psychologist I have ever seen online. Therapy has never worked for me as none of them were ever onto all the stuff she is onto. Very intelligent.
My male friend divulged that he was abused by a cousin when he was a child...I gave him your info and told him how amazing this past month has been for me learning about cptsd.
I’m a psychology major and I’ve been the therapist nine honestly tell you what you do for yourself in your own drive to get better is going to help you more than anything!!!! this is very good information
Learning about the other person actually one of the thing that helps me most in gaining understanding of what’s happening.. although it’s not more important than understanding what going on inside of me. Both builds the story.
I'm a Trucker, so I have no choice but to be alone 98% of the time. I've always had social anxiety, but 18yrs of trucking has given me a bad case of it. How do I improve connections with people?
You may want to check out my Connection Bootcamp. It's just for people who are working on forming better relationships all around: bit.ly/CCF_Connection
my goodness! ive been in therapy for 8 years and the way you explain all this is sooooo accuarte. I wish i had of been exposed to this ages ago in stead of going in circles! Thank you! Very insightful and it makes perfect sense
On YT platform, your videos are the most useful for me until i die. I've got your channel today luckily and I'm gonna keep you subscribed for the rest of my life.
As I looked through the comments, I was wondering how to live with the fact that both of my parents were abusers, Mother was the narcacist and my father appeared to have Stokholm Syndrome. I never had any other adult take an interest in me. Those mitigating forces just weren't there. I feel worse than ever at 58 and have become a recluse. I'm constantly triggered. Tough cases like mine don't seem to have solutions.
Thank you so much for your excellent videos. They are helping me. I am grateful. Your videos help me more than therapy ever did. You get it. Thank you for choosing and having the courage to stay alive. You're making a difference for so many people. Blessings 💕
I've gone back and forth for decades now. With a recent retirement it all came back in it's sneaky way - like, WTH am I supposed to do now? No ideas, so just retreat into myself. Your videos, and Patrick's, are helping remind me. Thanks
I thought I had done the work and I was healed and regulated. Then I had some set backs and more trauma and some how feel like I did no healing and only was repressing it and it came back with a vengeance and some. I am struggling to not slip into self isolation and withdrawing from family and friends . I know I can dig myself out but it’s like I am stuck in quick sand
What do you do if you really don’t desire being around people? What concerns me is my lack of motivation to be around anyone....EVER. I’m just so tired of having to put forth the effort to socialize. It’s exhausting. I honestly don’t miss interactions at all and I am much happier and relieved being alone.
In my mind your concept of "breaking the wheel" was essential to make the click, to see clear and break the chains with my trauma and noticed that the power is in my rational mind and soul to start and work in my healing.. thank you so much ❤
Wow. The statement your making about the 2nd group at around 1:03:21 is SO profound for me. I’m definitely this group but am growing weary of being at this stage and hopeful to move into the group focused on my own AGENCY❤
So happy I found you! I am so glad you discussed therapy! I would drive there fairly happy and come out a disaster! In retrospect, I think she was more challenged than me. I knew all her issues by first month. But since our psychiatrist recommended her, who she was seeing for her problems, told us to go there, my daughter and I went.
Thank you so much Anna for your work and efforts to help people. There aren't enough words to express how grateful I am. I now truly have hope for a better life. Please don't ever believe people who are against you. Nobody talks about stuff you mention, although they are so true (like e.g. how hurrying is a trigger too - a main one for me). Not even at the therapist chair it is talked about. Finally I feel heard and seen. And the tools offered are tremendously helpful. It doesn't matter you are not a qualified therapist. Your experience and coping skills do matter and offer great help to others, which is not written in psychology textbooks. I cannot thank you enough Anna. You are a gift from God.
Yeah honestly watching her videos have helped sooo much as someone who suffers from severe anxiety and just learning about cptsd. Her videos actually help.
I tried to have relationships. I really did. Then some nice church lady would tell my partner that we were living in sin, and he should get the hell away from me. In my teens, if my dad thought I was getting too close to a friend, he would cuss them out and kick my ass. I relate PAIN to relationships, and the only safe place for me is to not be in one. The more I learn, the more I realize how broken I am.
I need help with one of those situations which was put to the side. How do you deal with taking care of toxic, dysfunctional aging parents when they are still behaving badly and triggering all the old childhood wounds of shame, anxiety, abandonment, guilt, dependency and helplessness. This really sucks, they stole my childhood and potential to have a happy life and now when I'm trying to heal, I'm expected to give that up and jump right back into the fire which burned me in the first place. There is no one else who is going to take care of them. The irony is, they abandoned their own aging parents by moving across the world and yet they expect their own children to stay around for them, which we are in spite of it being harmful to our own health.
I will pass your question along to Anna, but if you want her feedback on your particular situation I would encourage you to write in a letter to her. Here is a link if you're interested: bit.ly/CCF_Letters -Calista@TeamFairy
Thank you so much. The hint with the neurological damage in brain with cptsd is so helpful and in stressful situations it can influence my behaviour very strong.
I discovered your videos few days ago, and very much possible I have complex ptsd trauma from childhood. Somehow I knew I need to reregulate myself in some way and in last 1 year my best way to reregulate myself is through painting and drawing. Even after 30 minutes of it I can be reregulated for next few hours. That is why I started my youtube channel about art. But I will try your advices as well. Thanks. Sonja
If you are an Arabic Speaker Anna, I would mistake you with Fayrouz the famous Legend in Lebanon you know! One point here: The two column stuff you have listed is actually: Praise the Lord for the turn out of your agonies into blessings; Trust Allah.
Tonight I discovered silence again. A time of quiet. Stick some ear plugs in, turn on the heating pad after a good shower and lay flat on my back with NO stimulation. This is the beginning of healing for me I believe. That and journaling will do wonders to breaking through the chaos. Thanks for your videos. You’re truly helping so many of us out here. 🤍🕊️🙏🏼
Thank you so much for your work!!! Your empathy for the desaster outcome in reactions help to heal faster and easier. After so many work on myself and my behavior I finally can let go of the past through having the trust of being understood. I listen to your videos to reorganize and looking forward for more.
I don't know what loving relationships are. I know what dysfunctional ones are. Right now I still feel like I got nothing to give. No energy etc. Thanks for your channel!
“Low hanging fruit problems “ and “0ld memories bucket” are excellent visual tools immediately available for use in healing!! 🙏✌🏾 it’s been so bad I don’t wanna talk to anybody in my family anymore ever. Projection of my flaws as a disguise for their narcissism and ego.
Thank you Anna, I agree therapy dies not help. Thank you fir your teaching. I thought it was my feelings my stuck place according to who I am but you make me realized it is all who experienced trauma in their childhood.
Hi Anna it's been awhile I could have used this a couple of days ago I got dysregulated and took apart every relationship I had built this video helped me in that I recognize I need to put away the things I go to to relieve my pain and I've grown comfortable there
I only realized that my life was traumatic 2 yrs ago in a therapy group for trauma survivors that was led by my therapist at a mental health service for adults only. I had been reluctant to attend the group at 1st, but decided to try it. I was overwhelmed when the coleader started listing all the types of trauma there is. I realized that i had experienced all those types except for childhood sexual abuse. In fact at that time i was stil going thru trauma as a homeless person. I have only just been aware of how dysregulated ive been and get since i found your videos just 2 months ago.
So glad I found your channel 💕 I’ve never heard of Limerence before. It explained so much. I usually feel lost and angry after listening to something useful but that doesn’t really help my specific situation. That’s what I found in your channel, it is useful but also specifically addresses my issues. Can’t thank you enough.
This woman has so much hard-earned wisdom. And the proof is definitely in the pudding. A degree, letters behind someone’s name, these do not mean a therapist is an expert, or the right person to help you in ways that will make your life better. There is very much a limit to the benefit of talk therapy alone. Approaches that teach skills for coping and arresting the unhelpful beliefs and maladaptive coping methods that may have helped us survive our childhoods but do not serve us now, these are EVIDENCE BASED approaches that have been shown to result in positive and lasting change.
Some people never have another relationship and stay reading books and owning cats no doubt. Not everyone can move on from trauma and it depends on the severity. I encourage everyone to move forward after healing but not everyone will and your right! You will get hurt again because people always leave. Nothing is forever as people die. We just get use to losing people! Growing old sucks
Thank you for your good work. I stumbled across you a few weeks ago and have learned so much and things are making sense. I’ve made a lot of progress since finding you. You are wonderful!
I too was tickle tortured to the point I’d be in tears afterwards and still he continued to do it, my father…. Who was more often not even a fun person, this however, was apparently “fun” for him. 🤦♀️ yep! Crappy childhood memory
Thank you so much for sharing all this with us. Love your videos ❤ Started with the daily practice. Struggling with it, but at the same time.... I can see positive results already. It's like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Thank you 🌺🌺🌺
How do I sign up for the daily zoom calls, Anna? I'm a 29 year old woman who just learned I have CPTSD in the past few months and am facing the possibility of a divorce from my husband who I highly suspect has Asperger's syndrome. All the 11 years I've been with him I took him not reacting in a way I consider to be emotionally normal as a personal rejection and my abandonment fears were triggered a lot. To say I have fear and resentment right now is the understatement of the century. I am terrified. Please let me know how to sign up, thank you so much.
Living with someone who has Asperger ( not available emotionally and extremely preoccupied with his own needs, anxious and angry ) is very difficult. Please be gentle with yourself. I know what is like… ❤
Start with the Daily Practice free course, that will get you invited calls that Anna hosts. bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice For daily Daily Practice calls, consider membership :) -Cara@TeamFairy
Somatic Experiencing and EMDR are very effective for C-PTSD. SE regulates the nervous system, increases vagal tone, and teaches how to get trauma out of the body. Somatic Experiencing is a distinctly body-centered approach to healing. EMDR is a 3-pronged approach. It involves processing details of the past events that set the groundwork for the disturbance, processing the current situations that trigger distress, and processing and installing in the brain what is needed for the future (future template / future rehearsal).
I am just so thankful to have found you. I found your video on limerance at the perfect time. I had an experience with someone it was a good one but i became so disregulated. I had to ground myself out and think this is a pattern I have and your video popped up on my page. Wow this is what I'm experiencing. I am in awe of your articulation and presentation for your videos this is similar to what I have tried to do with my channel. I really love what you are doing, it's inspiring, genuis, and holds so much value. Beautiful Job!!!❤
Thank you for you work. I’m just wondering about “I was neglected as a child” - “My stepfather took a good care of me”. How can it be possible at the same time?
@Kye Case yeah I base my theory on "normal" aka healthy parents Love their kids and want the best for them. Sadly that doesnt hold in a toxic hateful violence filled families. Some ppl are indeed evil.
Thanks for everything Anna 🖤 you are a light in the dark place of healing and I notice HUGE changes in myself since starting your videos you always bring me down the earth, I also really love Tim fletcher do you watch him too ?
Wow. How can you be so eloquent and organized with this information , your thoughts. Did you write everything down over the years ? I'd like to have my stuff so clear. What 's the one thing I could do ?
Wow good to hear from you about this study about the worthlesness of the psychiatric understanding of ,illnesses,. I had to learn them and thought always, it's nit really helpful. Because they are often trauma responses. And in addition to that, everyone is born with a own character.
Ever since I discovered Anna, I cannot go to sleep without spending at least 5-10 minutes watching her videos. And I truly mean every single night.
So soothing
Meeee tooo, soothing, insightful and funny, thank you Anna
Me too!!
ME TOO! every day I have to ground myself with her.
❤same❤
I don’t need to pay 500 a month for therapy anymore. She has made more sense in this one video than all the talking with the therepist
@michellebucci3748 Wow! That’s rather amazing!
Well yes. But I also would say it depends on the therapist and the used methode.
Trauma, -art,-or Bodytrauma-therapies are good. But there are not so many out there or not payed by injurances. Even sometimes not from private ones. Strange though. Because all therapies where the body is involved and creativity etc., helps more than the only Blabla-therapy.
wild. i have cptsd and i know what it is and i don't understand any of her suggestions. none of this seems to apply at all.
I feel the same. I am so grateful 🙏🏻 for Anna 🫂👼💕
I got a better apartment, better paycheck, a little better clothes. My equivalent to staying in bad jobs, is a messy house. I have started decluttering and got a tremendous back pain. I understand that this pain is related to me starting to declutter. Because if I get rid of the clutter, then my excuse for not inviting friends home is gone, and I have to take accountability for my social life 😳 I am afraid, but I am sooo sick and tired of being sick and tired, I have to do this
relate. hard. also, find that when i begin to make headway and connection and small forays into interpersonal intimacy (not dating), i get nervous, uncertain, shut down after ... difficult to maintain friendships in current state.
I've done a lot of therapy over the years, tried antidepressants and even medically monitored ketamine (which pulled me out of a near catatonic depression). But I'm still much the same. Listening to you, I felt a light of hope turn. I'm in. Thank you! ❤
I'm so glad the video was helpful! You're in the right place and we're all rooting for you :) -Calista@TeamFairy
Have you heard of Dr Joe Dispenza's work? It might help change your state of being. Blessings ✨
🤗🤗
Honestly nothing worked for me just low contact and a very very slow boring life, writing, and surrounding myself with people I wish my parents had been
@@rociomartinez8666hope you are doing better now 🤗🤗🤗
Because of your daily practice I ve converted to God after 20 years.
Thank you God
#1 00:49 Learn what CPTSD is.
#2 1:22 Be willing to look at yourself and notice some of the issues that may have nothing to do with trauma. "Normal person problems" can be easier to solve. IE they are the low hanging fruit.
#3 2:30 Prepare to move your stories about your trauma out of your looping-mind and into the "memory bucket." You will remember them but they won't trigger a physiological or neurological response. To do this, start to write about them, even just a little bit at a time.
#4 3:52 Stop trying to make other people not trigger you. It's probably not possible anyway and the empowered approach is to learn to calm your own triggers. Then you become more perceptive and you develop "discernment:" IE is it just me or is this person a jerk?" When you can calm triggers and have more discernment you have more flexibility about where you can spend time. You will have better boundaries.
#5 7:26 Stop trash talking the people you choose to have in your life. If you really want to heal stop using labels, and focus more on how you react/get troubled/get disregulated. Example: calling someone a narcissist. You don't have to keep them in your life, but focusing on yourself is your superpower.
#6 9:04 Stop clinging to bad relationships that make you miserable. This doesn't mean you don't still attend to those relationships with obligations, duties, and financial complications. She means more like boyfriends and girlfriends who don't treat you well.
#7 10:19 Don't stay in work that makes you miserable unless your life depends on it. If the paycheck is not the problem right now, ask yourself: "is being miserable at work the way I avoid facing responsibility for my life?"
#8 12:20 Detatch from the belief that you passively or magically just attract bad people. Acknowledge that the issue is who *YOU* tolerate, date, sleep with... Work on your red flag detector. You are the gate keeper. IE "I attract mosquitoes but I don't marry them."
#9 12:42 If you have addictive behaviors, make recovery your first priority. Alcohol, drugs, food, porn, spending etc. It's tempting to try to control or run away or seek oblivion. If you are using anything to escape life's ups and downs, you cannot recover from trauma. The path towards healing always involves facing what's going on. You need a means to handle what may come. That is true freedom.
#10 15:41 Thought exercise: ask yourself "if I had to solve this problem what are 10 things I could do [in this case- to heal from cptsd]?
Thank you for your work and efforts in producing this list @MR
Real MVP
Good solid stuff to DO with your own life! Thank you.
@@akosth2275 I'm intrigued by this comment because one refrain I hear in my head (from my critic) is "I don't DO anything."
Thanks for the list, great job too
I’m so lucky that I have a psychologist that specialises in Trauma and mainly CPTSD. We are starting EMDR therapy. I always leave my session feeling validated and understood. She has vowed to help me overcome all of this and has even offered me a few free sessions. My birthday was in and May and she got me a small cake with a candle because she knows I have no one in my life. I got so lucky
love this. thank you
❤❤❤
52:30 CPTSD throws off brain chemistry, attention, hormones, immune system... every system in your body.
And I'm here, telling my doctor's there HAS TO BE some kind of root of all of my problems. But they gaslight me and said: You're just unlucky.
I was unlucky alright. But in a different way than they think.
As a health care practitioner it is so frustrating to see my clients going to drs psychologist psychiatrist all ignoring the fact that the trauma from childhood has impacted the biochemistry in the body leading to drug addiction leading to more biochemical imbalances Without any hope of recovery !! I CAN NOT ACCEPT THAT !! It’s why I’m on my mission of love to combine what I know to heal body mind soul ALL HAS to be addressed !! Including epigenetics from our previous generations !
It can be done there are safe effective fast techniques to help dissolve the core of cptsd without reliving the pain of the trauma like most therapies ! No wonder they don’t work .. long term.. they keep you in the problem of pain! Renewing the subconscious! How about changing our subconscious ., from our own wisdom not some therapist telling us what snd how we should think?!? Real ability to develop subconscious emotional intelligence !! ❤ through the ups downs! Never being STUCK again!! But healing from the heart!!
@@alysonhorne9156How does one do this, "renew the subconscious" mind?
I also listen to her every night, I also love her soft voice. She is a soft speaker, and never raises her voice. Not only great material, but soothing to listen to. ❤
Thanks for the daily practice! I am 73, survivor of abuse. I have been doing the daily practice for two days! Sincerely grateful! Thanks!
That's so wonderful, I'm glad it's helping you!
-Cara@TeamFairy
So glad for you! I’m 72, good to know it’s not too late!
Anna offers the most practical guidance out there. I'm endlessly grateful for her videos.
Thank you for the work that you do ❤ I'm 26 years old and have struggled for years with CPTSD. It has impacted all areas of my life.
Wishing the best for you. CPTSD has been a total life stopper for me, I'm a few years older than you. Let's turn this around.
@@emilyc4351 thank you so much dear. Wishing you healing as well. We are all in the same boat ❤❤❤❤
@@Kaykay-jh1zu I truly believe we can do it, if we stay focused and are brave. Take care 🙂
Me too,26...now re parenting my self, building my life from scratch.
@@raiontheone we're all here with you, remind yourself every day you're not the only one going through this even if you can't see it in the people around you
You have helped me more than medical professionals. It feels so good to be believed and understood. Thanks Fairy.
I was told by a mental health nurse 3 years ago that there was no such thing as cptsd, even though it was recognised by the NHS. It's going to take years for health care systems to recognise this fully. You describe my life to a T and for the 1st time ever I feel understood. I am quite a way into my own recovery, following various paths, but it's dysregulation and discernment I have been stuck with which is was brought me to you. I've been doing the daily reflections. They've been really helpful and I'm sleeping properly again 🙏 I also realise that my mother projected this onto me, and I feel more compassion for her than I ever did before. But with a weary distance, I'm not falling for that again! Thank you for everything you have done so far 🙏
Thanks for all the work you do . 52 years old and still trying to figure out what works for me...
❤
Same here. I am 71. So age is not an issue dear. Courage 💪 is. ❤
This woman is healing us en mass. Thank you Anna.
She is the most thorough, in depth, and on point psychologist I have ever seen online. Therapy has never worked for me as none of them were ever onto all the stuff she is onto. Very intelligent.
This is why I’m weary about therapy. Her videos are super helpful for so many who are suffering
She's not a psychologist nor a trained therapist but imo she's helped more ppl than most schooled professionals because she lived it.
You speak with such compassion---you're like the kind but effective mum I needed growing up.
My male friend divulged that he was abused by a cousin when he was a child...I gave him your info and told him how amazing this past month has been for me learning about cptsd.
I am so glad I found your channel. I am 42 years old and you have just given me the most hope I have had in years
I’m a psychology major and I’ve been the therapist nine honestly tell you what you do for yourself in your own drive to get better is going to help you more than anything!!!! this is very good information
Learning about the other person actually one of the thing that helps me most in gaining understanding of what’s happening.. although it’s not more important than understanding what going on inside of me. Both builds the story.
Once you understand the storeybuou can also let it go
I'm a Trucker, so I have no choice but to be alone 98% of the time. I've always had social anxiety, but 18yrs of trucking has given me a bad case of it. How do I improve connections with people?
You may want to check out my Connection Bootcamp. It's just for people who are working on forming better relationships all around: bit.ly/CCF_Connection
I'm really grateful I found this channel. She has a real handle on all of this. I'm learning a lot from these videos.
I'm so glad you found us!
-Cara@TeamFairy
my goodness! ive been in therapy for 8 years and the way you explain all this is sooooo accuarte. I wish i had of been exposed to this ages ago in stead of going in circles! Thank you! Very insightful and it makes perfect sense
On YT platform, your videos are the most useful for me until i die. I've got your channel today luckily and I'm gonna keep you subscribed for the rest of my life.
Truly this is helping change the world right now. I see so many people trying to heal from narcissistic abuse and trauma.
Not everyone has a positive side. You had a lot of positive
As I looked through the comments, I was wondering how to live with the fact that both of my parents were abusers, Mother was the narcacist and my father appeared to have Stokholm Syndrome. I never had any other adult take an interest in me. Those mitigating forces just weren't there. I feel worse than ever at 58 and have become a recluse. I'm constantly triggered. Tough cases like mine don't seem to have solutions.
@@laurashehadi7614Have you tried Jesus Christ?? 🙏🏾✝️ 🕊️🔥
13:01, I think there is something to explore because tolerance is a virtue but when harm happens it becomes something else.
1:07:12 hard to believe it's possible. Your vids are so informational, thank you so much. Crazy how spot on everything is.
Thank you Anna for videos that change lives. CPTSD is such a giant in our lives. You break it down in small ways that help daily. You are AWESOME❤️
You are a savior I wish my son could have listened to you. He unfortunately became a victim
I have ADHD and autism. Being on time and cleaning the kitchen are NOT low-hanging fruit for me!! They’re at the top of the tree. Ha. 🤦🏻♀️
Thank you so much for your excellent videos. They are helping me. I am grateful. Your videos help me more than therapy ever did. You get it. Thank you for choosing and having the courage to stay alive. You're making a difference for so many people. Blessings 💕
I've gone back and forth for decades now. With a recent retirement it all came back in it's sneaky way - like, WTH am I supposed to do now? No ideas, so just retreat into myself. Your videos, and Patrick's, are helping remind me. Thanks
Thank you sooooo much! Your compassion and kindness in teaching all of this is wonderful!! The MOST helpful thing I've EVER HEARD OR READ!!
I thought I had done the work and I was healed and regulated. Then I had some set backs and more trauma and some how feel like I did no healing and only was repressing it and it came back with a vengeance and some. I am struggling to not slip into self isolation and withdrawing from family and friends . I know I can dig myself out but it’s like I am stuck in quick sand
What do you do if you really don’t desire being around people? What concerns me is my lack of motivation to be around anyone....EVER. I’m just so tired of having to put forth the effort to socialize. It’s exhausting. I honestly don’t miss interactions at all and I am much happier and relieved being alone.
Underneath all the brokenness, there is wholeness
ABSOLUTELY OUTSTANDING VIDEO..THANK YOU 🙏🤗
Glad you enjoyed it!
-Cara@TeamFairy
In my mind your concept of "breaking the wheel" was essential to make the click, to see clear and break the chains with my trauma and noticed that the power is in my rational mind and soul to start and work in my healing.. thank you so much ❤
Wow. The statement your making about the 2nd group at around 1:03:21 is SO profound for me. I’m definitely this group but am growing weary of being at this stage and hopeful to move into the group focused on my own AGENCY❤
You can do it! Start here: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
-Cara@TeamFairy
So happy I found you! I am so glad you discussed therapy! I would drive there fairly happy and come out a disaster! In retrospect, I think she was more challenged than me. I knew all her issues by first month. But since our psychiatrist recommended her, who she was seeing for her problems, told us to go there, my daughter and I went.
Thank you so much Anna for your work and efforts to help people. There aren't enough words to express how grateful I am. I now truly have hope for a better life. Please don't ever believe people who are against you. Nobody talks about stuff you mention, although they are so true (like e.g. how hurrying is a trigger too - a main one for me). Not even at the therapist chair it is talked about. Finally I feel heard and seen. And the tools offered are tremendously helpful. It doesn't matter you are not a qualified therapist. Your experience and coping skills do matter and offer great help to others, which is not written in psychology textbooks. I cannot thank you enough Anna. You are a gift from God.
Yeah honestly watching her videos have helped sooo much as someone who suffers from severe anxiety and just learning about cptsd. Her videos actually help.
So grateful for your work and your healing. I feel encouraged and excited about this new way to look at trauma. Thank you for your work.
I tried to have relationships. I really did. Then some nice church lady would tell my partner that we were living in sin, and he should get the hell away from me. In my teens, if my dad thought I was getting too close to a friend, he would cuss them out and kick my ass. I relate PAIN to relationships, and the only safe place for me is to not be in one. The more I learn, the more I realize how broken I am.
Ugh, so helpful. Thank you for doing what you do. It saves a lot of wasting time with useless therapists who never even mention your past😢
Yeah, that has happened with me..
It's so wonderful to hear somebody who really understands what I've lived!
I need help with one of those situations which was put to the side. How do you deal with taking care of toxic, dysfunctional aging parents when they are still behaving badly and triggering all the old childhood wounds of shame, anxiety, abandonment, guilt, dependency and helplessness. This really sucks, they stole my childhood and potential to have a happy life and now when I'm trying to heal, I'm expected to give that up and jump right back into the fire which burned me in the first place. There is no one else who is going to take care of them. The irony is, they abandoned their own aging parents by moving across the world and yet they expect their own children to stay around for them, which we are in spite of it being harmful to our own health.
I will pass your question along to Anna, but if you want her feedback on your particular situation I would encourage you to write in a letter to her. Here is a link if you're interested: bit.ly/CCF_Letters -Calista@TeamFairy
The Bible says to “ honor our mother and father “, But, it does not say to become a “ whipping post, or a door mat”
Just sayin.
Thank you for yet another fantastic video.
Thank you so much. The hint with the neurological damage in brain with cptsd is so helpful and in stressful situations it can influence my behaviour very strong.
I discovered your videos few days ago, and very much possible I have complex ptsd trauma from childhood. Somehow I knew I need to reregulate myself in some way and in last 1 year my best way to reregulate myself is through painting and drawing. Even after 30 minutes of it I can be reregulated for next few hours. That is why I started my youtube channel about art. But I will try your advices as well. Thanks. Sonja
If you are an Arabic Speaker Anna, I would mistake you with Fayrouz the famous Legend in Lebanon you know!
One point here: The two column stuff you have listed is actually: Praise the Lord for the turn out of your agonies into blessings; Trust Allah.
I HAVE TO DO THIS MY HEALING DEPENDS ON IT...ANNA I HIGHLY RESPECT YOU AND GIVE THANKS YOU'RE HERE FOR US 🙏💛💜
A good doctor is open to learn! Yes as science is always changing and learning more!!!!
this could not have come at a better time. thank you Anna
Can't thank you enough for putting these out for free
Tonight I discovered silence again. A time of quiet. Stick some ear plugs in, turn on the heating pad after a good shower and lay flat on my back with NO stimulation. This is the beginning of healing for me I believe. That and journaling will do wonders to breaking through the chaos. Thanks for your videos. You’re truly helping so many of us out here. 🤍🕊️🙏🏼
heat has been so therapeutic for me over the past decade ,,, when i am well enough, yoga, dance, meditation ,,,, groups are very hard
Thank you so much for your work!!! Your empathy for the desaster outcome in reactions help to heal faster and easier. After so many work on myself and my behavior I finally can let go of the past through having the trust of being understood. I listen to your videos to reorganize and looking forward for more.
I'm only halfway through this and quite new to the channel but this is epic thank you❤
I don't know what loving relationships are. I know what dysfunctional ones are. Right now I still feel like I got nothing to give. No energy etc. Thanks for your channel!
“Low hanging fruit problems “ and “0ld memories bucket” are excellent visual tools immediately available for use in healing!! 🙏✌🏾 it’s been so bad I don’t wanna talk to anybody in my family anymore ever. Projection of my flaws as a disguise for their narcissism and ego.
We understand as few others can, you're in the right place. -Calista@TeamFairy
Thank you Anna, I agree therapy dies not help. Thank you fir your teaching. I thought it was my feelings my stuck place according to who I am but you make me realized it is all who experienced trauma in their childhood.
Hi Anna it's been awhile I could have used this a couple of days ago I got dysregulated and took apart every relationship I had built this video helped me in that I recognize I need to put away the things I go to to relieve my pain and I've grown comfortable there
If you haven't tried this free course yet, now is the time :) bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
-Cara@TeamFairy
I had to stop therapy and all I got past for the last 30...60 days and reliving the trauma...thx glad I found you...B-Lynn
Glad you're here!
-Cara@TeamFairy
I only realized that my life was traumatic 2 yrs ago in a therapy group for trauma survivors that was led by my therapist at a mental health service for adults only. I had been reluctant to attend the group at 1st, but decided to try it. I was overwhelmed when the coleader started listing all the types of trauma there is. I realized that i had experienced all those types except for childhood sexual abuse. In fact at that time i was stil going thru trauma as a homeless person. I have only just been aware of how dysregulated ive been and get since i found your videos just 2 months ago.
4:14, joey does this. I can not sing nor whistle for a moment. But joey has no problem when Scott whistles.
OMG this is opening my eyes SO much ! 🙏. Thank you for this !
Glad you're here! -Frida@TeamFairy
Thanks Anna, this is very valuable and lots of suggestions and information.
So glad I found your channel 💕 I’ve never heard of Limerence before. It explained so much. I usually feel lost and angry after listening to something useful but that doesn’t really help my specific situation. That’s what I found in your channel, it is useful but also specifically addresses my issues. Can’t thank you enough.
1:56:18, is there much difference between feeling triggered and needing to defend one's self?
This woman has so much hard-earned wisdom. And the proof is definitely in the pudding. A degree, letters behind someone’s name, these do not mean a therapist is an expert, or the right person to help you in ways that will make your life better. There is very much a limit to the benefit of talk therapy alone. Approaches that teach skills for coping and arresting the unhelpful beliefs and maladaptive coping methods that may have helped us survive our childhoods but do not serve us now, these are EVIDENCE BASED approaches that have been shown to result in positive and lasting change.
This video is unbelievable. So helpful!! I was just diagnosed with cPTSD and I can’t believe how SO much of this directly speaks to me!!
I'm so glad the video was helpful! -Calista@TeamFairy
Me too .... love this "Crappy Childhood Fairy Godmother" ❤
Some people never have another relationship and stay reading books and owning cats no doubt. Not everyone can move on from trauma and it depends on the severity. I encourage everyone to move forward after healing but not everyone will and your right! You will get hurt again because people always leave. Nothing is forever as people die. We just get use to losing people! Growing old sucks
Thank you for your good work. I stumbled across you a few weeks ago and have learned so much and things are making sense. I’ve made a lot of progress since finding you. You are wonderful!
I am so happy to hear that! Thank you for taking the time to comment, I'm sure Anna will appreciate this :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I'm so happy I came across this video...thank you so much for sharing!!! God bless you ❤️
I have learned to be joyful living through others lives. Seeing them happy and healtby, makes me happy. 🎉🎉🎉
I too was tickle tortured to the point I’d be in tears afterwards and still he continued to do it, my father…. Who was more often not even a fun person, this however, was apparently “fun” for him. 🤦♀️ yep! Crappy childhood memory
Thank you so much for sharing all this with us. Love your videos ❤ Started with the daily practice. Struggling with it, but at the same time.... I can see positive results already. It's like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. Thank you 🌺🌺🌺
This is so good and helpful shared with my community
You are literally my life saver. Thank you !
How do I sign up for the daily zoom calls, Anna? I'm a 29 year old woman who just learned I have CPTSD in the past few months and am facing the possibility of a divorce from my husband who I highly suspect has Asperger's syndrome. All the 11 years I've been with him I took him not reacting in a way I consider to be emotionally normal as a personal rejection and my abandonment fears were triggered a lot. To say I have fear and resentment right now is the understatement of the century. I am terrified. Please let me know how to sign up, thank you so much.
She's provided several links to her website in the description. Wishing you well and strength on your new journey to healing 💪🏼💝
@@aannwwsalam thank you ♥️
Living with someone who has Asperger ( not available emotionally and extremely preoccupied with his own needs, anxious and angry ) is very difficult. Please be gentle with yourself. I know what is like… ❤
@@gorunsko31 thank you so much for your note. It comforted me right now. I'm sorry you've been through similar, I wouldn't wish it on anyone
Start with the Daily Practice free course, that will get you invited calls that Anna hosts. bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
For daily Daily Practice calls, consider membership :)
-Cara@TeamFairy
Thanks I need this information, can't find it in any better time
Fantasic . I love your way of thinking .
Not only is your insight and advice brilliant and beyond affective and helpful❤..your voice is so soothing to listen to. I love your accent. Thankyou
You’re very kind. I’ll make sure Anna reads your note.
-Cara@TeamFairy
Somatic Experiencing and EMDR are very effective for C-PTSD. SE regulates the nervous system, increases vagal tone, and teaches how to get trauma out of the body. Somatic Experiencing is a distinctly body-centered approach to healing. EMDR is a 3-pronged approach. It involves processing details of the past events that set the groundwork for the disturbance, processing the current situations that trigger distress, and processing and installing in the brain what is needed for the future (future template / future rehearsal).
Thank you so much for all the videos you are making for us,you are God's love and gift.
Such wonderful, healing words. I am so thankful for you sharing them 🙏❤️
I'm so happy to hear that! Thank you for sharing these kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy
these vidoes along with the complex ptsd workbook by arielle swartz has helped me a lot with organizing my thoughts
Thx for mentioning the workbook. I'm going to check it out.
I am just so thankful to have found you. I found your video on limerance at the perfect time. I had an experience with someone it was a good one but i became so disregulated. I had to ground myself out and think this is a pattern I have and your video popped up on my page. Wow this is what I'm experiencing. I am in awe of your articulation and presentation for your videos this is similar to what I have tried to do with my channel. I really love what you are doing, it's inspiring, genuis, and holds so much value. Beautiful Job!!!❤
I am finally getting the paperwork organized and throw away unnecessary garbage or outdated on my desk. It will feel so good when it is clean.
You got this! -Calista@TeamFairy
God the you tube comercials are so annoying to me...they cut you off right in the middle of a thought. Love your help though!😉💖
Thank you so much ❤
Thank you for you work. I’m just wondering about “I was neglected as a child” - “My stepfather took a good care of me”. How can it be possible at the same time?
As much as your family COULD...they did. Was it as much as you needed? No... but it was their absolute best...sooo how mad can you be with them?
@@leahweinberger583 This isn't the case for everyone though
@Kye Case yeah I base my theory on "normal" aka healthy parents Love their kids and want the best for them.
Sadly that doesnt hold in a toxic hateful violence filled families. Some ppl are indeed evil.
Thanks for everything Anna 🖤 you are a light in the dark place of healing and I notice HUGE changes in myself since starting your videos you always bring me down the earth, I also really love Tim fletcher do you watch him too ?
I called to meet with my mental health doctor same day appointment
Wow. How can you be so eloquent and organized with this information , your thoughts. Did you write everything down over the years ? I'd like to have my stuff so clear. What 's the one thing I could do ?
Try my free course, the Daily Practice. It's linked in the description section under all my videos.
Though given my history and have good awareness of some of this already..It's woke me to awareness of others..Excellent .Thankyou
28:24, what other choice than isolation is there in a society of narcissists?
Thank you s0 very much!!❤❤ I'm feeling awakened!❤
Wow good to hear from you about this study about the worthlesness of the psychiatric understanding of ,illnesses,.
I had to learn them and thought always, it's nit really helpful. Because they are often trauma responses. And in addition to that, everyone is born with a own character.