Top posts from r/Cursedcomments on Reddit. Join the community subreddit at / emkay ! Video credits below. Editor ► (uncredited) Narrator ► / devotedly_jack
@@boing614 Nothing a bit of magic couldn't help with... After all, they do have the Polyjuice potions. Although there are restrictions on that, but magic is magic, there's sure to be a method. Hmm Harry, could drink Polyjuice potions for days on end, transforming into some girl, get pregnant from Dobby, birth a child, and revert back to regular Harry after breastfeeding and such was over. OR they could just be gay instead, it's a lot less complicated and no child will come from it, which to be honest makes it less of a hassle.
*Skins furry* *Finds that the animal had full anatomy* *The creature bleeds out slowly* *Realise it’s a pig* *Remembers I’m not a vegan* *Minecraft eating noise*
Japan Panda to pronounce dominance you must gather the skins of your greatest threats skinning furries and covering myself in the blood of vegans makes my the ultimate predator
According to the extremely accurate google translate, he said “Nice to meet you I opened my house”. Can someone who speaks Japanese confirm or deny this, with the real translation.
I can only guess, but maybe it was a Japanese phrase that meant "welcome at my home" or something. This needs more attention from somebody who REALLY understands Japanese. Being a comment with a reply, it might actually get it; people on the internet love to correct others even more than replying to questions. ;)
I’m pretty sure he just said his normal intro since I heard him say “Jack” Honestly I barely understood him and I’m learning Japanese....so I can’t really help sorry
No it's "はじめまして、僕はジャクです。" (Hajimemashite, Boku wa jaku desu) It means, "Nice to meet you, I am Jack" はじめまして = Nice to meet you 僕(pronounced ぼく) = I は（pronounced わ）= particle for subjects ジャク or maybe ジャック (jaku or jakku) = Jack です (pronounced desu) = is/am/are
5:00 as someone who plays in an orchestra, you could probably replace the regular conductor with this guy and most of us wouldn't know until like halfway through the song
@@lewisbaitup6352 *Three easy steps:* 1) Assume their belief systems 2) Formulate their argument. 3) Argue against that argument. *It's been working on the internet for over two decades. Let's keep that ball rolling.*
6:29 quick , make a hole through the roof next to the nails, _wait for someone to be under the chandelier and then cut the nails so the whole thing falls on the person -_ damn that got *_dark-_*
If I saw screws coming through my floor and I was in an apartment/hotel, I would find a way to unscrew them so the chandelier would just fall down and nobody would know what happened
9:30 Man has a stroke and permanently loses the ability to feel sad. "I'm sure there are some repercussions to this". My dude is literally at a funeral in the bottom 2 pics...
7:52, I can relate to that, But I call my mom in for the wasps, bees, or other stinging insects that get in my room. I can take care of the moths. And the spiders.
“Humans are not meant to be eaten”
Wellllll. . .
I like where you're going...
uh-
Oh, they're not?
Ah Crap
I swallow skin cells from my mouth!
so no one is talking about the fact that he use japanese for his introduction there at the beginning?
*_bruh_*
あの瞬間
Didn't realize that until i saw this
Well no one is mentioning him mentioning futanari.... But I don't think anyone wants to go down that road.
weeb
didnt even notice
"Humans are not suppose to be eaten"
Some prehistoric cat: *say sike right now*
_Humans are supposed to be eaten...._
_..by other humans._
If you know what I mean ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
The Dooter King, unfortunately it isn’t just prehistoric cats that eat humans... House cats will eat their owner if their owner dies at home.
Your welcome for this line by the way
Also Haast's Eagles.
K Fox what do you mean unfortunately
“Kit-Kats are meant to be eaten, Humans are not”
Not with that attitude they aren’t
Exactly!
Also, your welcome for that lmao
@@alwaystired2452 I see nothing wrong with your ideology there buddy.
@@iwenttoohio5045
Wait hold up. How and why are you here? It's impossible to avoid you
@@alwaystired2452 im inevitable child HEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHE
@@iwenttoohio5045 you might be inevitable but you're not inedible
Imagine if your bones were like glowsticks and every time you cracked your knuckles you would just start glowing.
Late night thoughts are weird.
dont.
Why
Ok Sand Undertale
Bone trooper 2.0
Hmmmmm.........
"Grandpa stop using my phone" sounds so harmless when taken out of context...
Thank you!!!!
Unless you're in the cemetery.
@@foofoo3344 ...That gives it context.
@@lanceminecraftzplazutub2604 Ah yes, you're right.
@@foofoo3344bro you are so underrated I can’t describe
Master had given dobby a sock to put on his master's co-
Me: NO!
But then Dobby might get pregnant, if they skip that particular step in the instructions for _How To Not Get Pregnant As House-Elf_ book.
( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
@@NamFlowEN If Dobby got pregnant Harry Potter would have been so much cooler. Oh man imagine Dobby Jr. going goo goo ga ga and stuff. Oh man
both of them are male
@@boing614 Nothing a bit of magic couldn't help with... After all, they do have the Polyjuice potions. Although there are restrictions on that, but magic is magic, there's sure to be a method. Hmm Harry, could drink Polyjuice potions for days on end, transforming into some girl, get pregnant from Dobby, birth a child, and revert back to regular Harry after breastfeeding and such was over.
OR they could just be gay instead, it's a lot less complicated and no child will come from it, which to be honest makes it less of a hassle.
@@EmKay What in the flying hell did I just read?
Blessed images: i will make your day better
Made me smile: pfft i can do better
Eye bleach: hold my chonky shiba
Cursedcomments: I EAT Dogs!!! The SLAVES in my BASEMENT are SCREAMING!!! INCEST JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh man this subreddit is Funny
Ummmmm sure
@@EmKay Your sense of humor is unique.
@@EmKay and a few times some actually funny comments
eyeblech: *uh.*
The guy who thought the eggs from shrek was the best animed food
Me: *Laughs in ghibli movies*
Me: *Screams daijobu*
lolk
FOOD WARS
Laughs in shougeki no soma
@@c-lao I would have said that one but I was thinking of movies
"OwO what's this Mr. Potter? Master has given Dobby a sock, to put on his master's co-"
AAAAAAA
Cursed comment right here
This comment right here officer
Literally Dobby tho
AAAAAAAAAA
Yep, no thanks.
Jack: "Slash eternity in Hell"
Me: Finally, he realises they like it too.
Satan said it himself: Either a 1bad sin or 1000 bad sins you're coming down here, but go for 100.000.000 and come down here a legend.
"Man dies after tring to beat a cartoon's record for being frozen."
Me: Mmm, i enjoy the taste of stupidity.
They taste better when they're fresh
@@kingofdeath9012 yup :>
R/whoosh moment for me....... bc i just realized, it could be, a joke or sarcasm...
They taste better young
*I hate weaklings*
Investigation found that he died of oxygen deprivation rather than freezing.
Headlines be like:
_Avatar: The last Airblunder_
*Skins furry*
*Finds that the animal had full anatomy*
*The creature bleeds out slowly*
*Realise it’s a pig*
*Remembers I’m not a vegan*
*Minecraft eating noise*
Relatable lol.
Please don't skin furries. Even if they don't bleed out, those suits take a long time to make...
Wha- 😨
Japan Panda to pronounce dominance you must gather the skins of your greatest threats skinning furries and covering myself in the blood of vegans makes my the ultimate predator
aminoapps.com/p/iyk9h5
In case you wanted the original post ~
(I'm the one who posted it originally)
"Uuuh, humans are not mate to be eaten..."
Me: say sike right now
More like
Cannibals: _excuse me???!_
Cannibals: _so you are telling me that I'm not allowed to eat your mom??_
@@NamFlowEN Cannibal gang rise up
Sorry, cannibal gang can’t rise up. Due to the cannibals eating each other, cannibal gang is slowly crumbling down.
Don't worry, I already disproved that
@CEO of Cheese can I get some cheese
Robin: humans are not meant to be eaten
Me: visible confusion
I too was confused, just like when I got arrested for snapping 513 people's necks.
@@alwaystired2452 Are you also known as SCP-173?
All hail the holy peanut
I named my dog 300 crunches, so I can tell people I do 300 crunches everyday
Just...dont...say...that...again
5un5hine *Did I stutter?*
@@5un5hinex the point of it is to be r/cursedcomments
@@5un5hinex R/whoosh
@@5un5hinex i ran over 10 miles yesterday :)
Was watching youngpeopleonmedia
This might fix my iq
Yes and no
Kayasit P. Yesnt
Just Some Guy with Glasses Well yes, but actually no
Eric Lee Yayn’t
Eric Lee
Yes, but no, but yes, but it’s a no that’s a yes. No.
I am genuinely disappointed that he doesn’t know the “every 60 in africa a minute passes” meme
Edit: or recognize
Me too. It seems like the voice actor doesn't visit subreddits for memes and don't read comments there.
WTF JACK........ Strike one, buddy. Two more misunderstood memes and something Very Bad Will Happen.....
Hell yeah emkay commented on my comment. Life accomplishment.
This will be jacks last
Time, or I will bring over one of Florida’s alligators, we call it “help there’s an alligator at my door”
No I think he just thought it doesn't fit, I didn't think it fit tbh
According to the extremely accurate google translate, he said “Nice to meet you I opened my house”. Can someone who speaks Japanese confirm or deny this, with the real translation.
I can only guess, but maybe it was a Japanese phrase that meant "welcome at my home" or something.
This needs more attention from somebody who REALLY understands Japanese. Being a comment with a reply, it might actually get it; people on the internet love to correct others even more than replying to questions. ;)
I’m pretty sure he just said his normal intro since I heard him say “Jack”
Honestly I barely understood him and I’m learning Japanese....so I can’t really help sorry
@DIO (case sensitive) Thank you
No it's "はじめまして、僕はジャクです。" (Hajimemashite, Boku wa jaku desu)
It means, "Nice to meet you, I am Jack"
はじめまして = Nice to meet you
僕(pronounced ぼく) = I
は（pronounced わ）= particle for subjects
ジャク or maybe ジャック (jaku or jakku) = Jack
です (pronounced desu) = is/am/are
@@achtsekundenfurz7876 damn you got a point there
"Master has given Dobby a sock, to put on master's co-"
_"put in"_ now that would be painful, perhaps you meant put on?
Unless Dobby wants to make his master suffer a lot.
I imagined dobby saying this and literally laughed out loud
Master has given Dobby a glock!
"master, this sock is full of a white liquid"
“Hello there”
- Obi-Wan
„General Kenobi“
-General Grievious
"We've been waiting for you."
-General Greivous
1:18 my body once forgot what breathing is
6:05
idk if anyone else has said this yet, but good on you for putting this in there, really important stuff.
Jack: "i guess that explains it, my dad is into futa, wait what"
Me: "ah, i see you're a man of culture as well"
3:15 I never knew that humans weren't supposed to be eaten
It's better to snap their necks like a Kit Kat Bar
@@alwaystired2452 I should try that
Wow, it's actually is pretty satisfying
My brother isn't moving help
Jack: speaks Japanese.
Every man of culture liked that.
2:36 he went to *THE CLICK* levels of wrong and not okay, with that song
Yee
Levels of wrong, more like levels of right
That’s fine, click knows what is good
Long ago, the four crafts lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Firecraft attacked 7:12
"Master has given Dobby a sock...
To put on his masters co-"
That killed me🤣
4:50
Take off like a helicopter.
5:00 as someone who plays in an orchestra, you could probably replace the regular conductor with this guy and most of us wouldn't know until like halfway through the song
2:36 That solo tho, that was amazing. Broadway quality right there
“Funny Comment”
Ok now you guys are supposed to laugh
**laugh**
im surprised this has 10 likes this terrible joke has 10 likes, I only expected like 2.3789 likes
Im supposed to laugh but i wont
"it's been 19 years we can joke about that"
Yeah, say that to jews and you will regret it a livetime
Noone:
When a girl turns 18: 0:34
Wait, I have to wait until she's 18?
@@kingofdeath9012 Well yes but actually no
0:27
allow me to introduce myself
(sans 'befriended your mom' the skeleton using speedwagon meme format from phantom blood)
Yeah what does this mean
I know the template, but what
Lee The Rat i said quote that i said in deltarune 'i befriended your mom'
The lady on the far right is holding her prop like a ragdoll.
Ok how am i supposed to tell their political beleifs
@@lewisbaitup6352
*Three easy steps:*
1) Assume their belief systems
2) Formulate their argument.
3) Argue against that argument.
*It's been working on the internet for over two decades. Let's keep that ball rolling.*
Also, the 5 other women are holding their props like puppies, so I assume their beliefs align with mine.
4:00 It would be nice to have a living girlfriend instead of an imaginary one.
it would be nice having a living girlfriend instead of the corpse in my basement
It would be nice to have a living girl instead of my mom in the basement
*ehhhh...*
@@sirbriskets *oh woah there m8-*
1:44 yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes YES.
Downtown pound town
6:29
quick , make a hole through the roof next to the nails, _wait for someone to be under the chandelier and then cut the nails so the whole thing falls on the person -_
damn that got *_dark-_*
I would actually do this. Why? Because I hate people.
@@-firathelightpheonix-3117 ah hell ya ,wELCOME To thE AnTisOciAl clUb
*owo mister potter, Master has given dobby a sock to put on his masters co-*
that got me
2:42 no don't stop? I was about to finish
You're alright
R/CURSEDCOMMENTS R/CURSEDCOMMENTS!
🤨
5:37 I have that ice tray, except it’s hard plastic and has a lid
Btw as soon as you put the ice in water it just shatters for some reason
2:14 eyy old Lara Croft
Emkay: uploads
Me: *time to look at the comments whilst watching the video*
3:10 no, the difference is that the kit kat is brown
So there is no difference?
If I saw screws coming through my floor and I was in an apartment/hotel, I would find a way to unscrew them so the chandelier would just fall down and nobody would know what happened
3:05 kit Kats are a delicious snack, humans are not... They are a meal
Hello there i was sad discovering jotaro die, now make me lose all Faith in humanity
Don't be sad
More will die later
Ocean man dies before he could reach the land
Ikr, but don't put anything else bc of the anime only fans
I wont tell you what part
No spoilers
Ahh my favourite subreddit
Okay I saw the second post and I REGRET TO BE ALIVE
I saw the video and I am dead inside.
Visit a shooting range
@@kingofdeath9012
Apparently they don't shoot dead people
@@jayitamutsuddi1442 You can
@@kingofdeath9012 Shoot myself or dead people?
I’m glad you’re back emkay it’s good to watch you videos again💕✨
4:43
*Subtitles*
3:27 was like a flash-bang
0:37
Trans mtf moms: alow me to interduse myself
9:30 Man has a stroke and permanently loses the ability to feel sad.
"I'm sure there are some repercussions to this".
My dude is literally at a funeral in the bottom 2 pics...
3:15
But why wouldn't they be meant to be eaten when they're made out of tasty food?
EXACTLY!!!
Roses are red
I love watching EmKay
I hope that all of you will have a great day
lol u too
Max Weber you’re first congrats
İt didn't work
Roses are red
That much is true
But, you guys,
Violets are not blue
@@thelambsauce7152 stole my comment
“Happy Day or Night or eternity in hell”
William Afton:😁
So I need to stop saying “I wish I can kill my sister” to “I will kill my sister”
1:56 I love who framed Roger Rabbit! Jessica is actually a human.
6:58 the word with is Censored.
1:25 I feel insulted
When you’re so late that the amount of views and likes actually make sense...
7:22 that falls under the third category.
“Pasty posterior pistachios”
7:52, I can relate to that, But I call my mom in for the wasps, bees, or other stinging insects that get in my room.
I can take care of the moths. And the spiders.
Satan.
Now this is a cursed comment.
girlfriend question has a 4th option: "willing" they are much quieter and less aggressive that way, or at least, so i heard.
2:55 Attention and curiosity is one and the same - in principle.
The phrase "mouth massage" is deeply upsetting to me.
0:54 I've killed billion's of people over videos
That's really cool 👍
Yo why are you watching TH-cam kid--OH GOD
4:25 I guess my family is weird ad starts playing "es gibt etwas was nicht al den Tod zur Ruhe kommen lässt XD
6:22
Saw that post today but it had different captions. It said:
"Hook a car battery into it"
That's more cursed, and i love it
Fun fact: you can’t say good eye might without sounding Australian
I can because I already have a strong accent
Bruh I why’d you do that?
Say it like Arnold Schwarzenegger
You can say that without sounding Australian, add punctuation. Good, eye might.
But saying it outloud your obviously not saying eye, your saying i
Omg I automatically did it with an Australian accent help
He called us white butt nuts at the end and I'm not sure how to feel about it.
Giggle Cake 👁👄👁
9:38 Well, you can't spell funeral without fun, he's got the spirit.
2:22, that's No0b3.
Why is Steve lookin at those villagers like that...
You should know
Hmmmmmmmmmmm let me think
3:54 Yeah its so annoying when your girlfriend turns into the moon
That's rough buddy
That's rough buddy
LETS START A CHAIN BOYS
That’s rough buddy
"Humans are not meant to be eaten."
Me biting a chunk of a kid's arm: Oh.
When your so early you can see the bottom of the comment
Yes
I cant
yeah it’s right here
v
*you're ^v^
Dokisaimu grammar nazi alert
I hyperextended my knee doing a front punch on the rod floor
As someone who actually has autism I found 5:26 surprisingly funny
5:45 i think you know where this about to go
He protecc
His name is jacc
But most importantly he loves us bacc
1:36 I love the name of this guy
3:00 I hear that that happens everywhere else too!
My worst nightmare,is that I sit on a toilet and run out of toilet paper
5:08 i will i hadn't killed that man 5 years ago
6:15 I love F-777!
hey there fellow gd fan
@@SamuraiVertHD greetings
Fingerdash
Last time I was this early slazo was still the narrator
Whos slazo?
I watch slazo and emkay and never knew this... I am ashamed
@@nobody7817 ohhhhhhh
Im sorry im kinda new. The first time i watched emkay the host was damien
Robin: "It's been 19 years"
Calculator: "My time has come."
My friend: I hate all mammals
Me: but humans are mammals
Friend: that’s the point
5:50 someone's into Elsa pegging.
1:30
So only gays are not vegetarians, right?
'Humans are not meant to be eaten'
Zombies be like:
8:45
-bouquet-
Borquet
Ehem. The fourth horsemen of gaming apocalypse is *_RNG_*
Correction: RNGesus
8:27 No, I'm pretty sure humans are 70% water
"My lips forgot what a kiss feels like"
My face forgot what a smile feels like
2:30 ono the click got him too
I can see him say that