3 UPDATES: When I Was 14, My Parents Dumped Me At My Grandma's House Due To My Special Needs...
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 ก.ย. 2024
- 3 UPDATES: When I Was 14, My Parents Dumped Me At My Grandma's House Due To My Special Needs & Wanted To Focus On My Brother Bcuz He Wasn't A "Freak" Like Me...10 Yrs Later, They Show Up At Grandma's Funeral, Asking Me To Share The Inheritance To Help Clean Up My Brother's Mess & I Say Yes, But With One Condition…
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So for context, when I was younger, I had been diagnosed with epilepsy pretty young. It was quite unfortunate because my parents were not really well equipped to deal with that sort of thing, emotionally, or mentally, and they started treating me like some sort of diseased child whom they could not deal with. I think I must have been around six years old when I first noticed how differently they treated my brother and me. My brother was three years older than me and my parents treated him far better than they treated me presumably because he was much easier to deal with, as compared to me.
OP, the only reason your brother got into the mess he got himself into is because they SPOILED HIM ROTTEN and he KNEW he could do whatever and they would have his back! Now that he has messed up royally, they want to place the responsibility on YOU! YOUR PARENTS ARE MONSTERS!
Being dumped was the best thing for OP. It was incentive to do better!!!
The irony, right??
He was much kinder than I would’ve been under of the circumstances
I have said on many other threads that in cases of extreme favoritism neither child is loved. They ultimately harmed her brother by creating a toxic environment for him to grow up in and their actions deprived him of being able to have a healthy and loving relationship with his sister.
And ultimately his health took a back seat to their pride. If they had truly loved him they would have lost face for him if need be.
People like OP's parents will never realize, let alone acknowledge, that they have done anything wrong. People like that are invariably right. I've known perfect people like that, you see. I don't blame OP for cutting contact and refusing to help them. They called him a freak and enabled their perfect son to make a mess of his own life. Parents of the year! Sure, it's easy for us to say OP shouldn't have acted out, but smoking in class and flipping off a teacher after years of being mistreated do not deserve being disowned. They dumped him out like garbage when he was 14. Let the garbage sit in the dump.
These are the parents that end up in 1-Star nursing homes and never get visits from their kids.
OP. I am so proud of you and your shiny gleaming spine. I stand in awe of you with your challenges having the courage and determination to not let your entitled, toxic parents define who you are as a person. Your grandma was a rock star, and she really did do right by you for taking you in, and also giving you a safe space to finally deal with your medical issues and the emotional abuse your parents were responsible for. You owe these people nothing. Your parents threw you out like garbage at 14 although they were obviously already emotionally abusing you long before that. I feel for your brother a tiny bit, although your parents never really kept him from seeing exactly who they were. He saw that they abandoned you almost from birth for medical conditions you had no control over. He saw your parents kicked you to the curb and even called you a freak at 14 years old. Good God, you brother was already 17 at that time, so he should have actually known long before he got involved with drugs that if he had any issues or problems, he was going to be hung out to dry.
OP, I hope you realize there are a certain group of trolls on these sites that will tell you that you are terrible for not helping out family. But in the end you only real family was your grandma. It is also pretty telling that within a year of you being kicked out of the house your brother was an adult. Your brother didn't seem to care enough about his grandma or you to reach out to you and form a relationship. YOur brother didn't consider you family any more than you mom and dad did, so why should you feel any obligation to him. A big thing to look at is that your brother made a decision as an adult to abuse drugs. Abusing drugs is something that everyone knows has consequence, the information about drug addition, what causes it, and how to spot the signs are everywhere. So everything your brother is suffering from is a result of an informed decision your brother made as a legal adult. Meanwhile you were ultimately kicked out because you were born with Epilepsy, ADHD and dyslexia. You had no control over any of these issues as a baby and child. Yet as soon as your parents were aware of you issues you became a burden, and they didn't love you or nourish you. Honey, these people are the worst of the worst, and you are better off just not having a thing to do with them. Use that money you have to build you a nice life. I hope you can surround yourself with caring friends to become your family.
OP, your parents have BIG NERVE after mistreating you ALL YOUR LIFE! Your brother, sorry, he's been the Golden Child, therefore, they better do what they can with what they have! Please go NC with them again FOR LIFE!
OP: ENJOY YOUR INHERITANCE!
If that was my brother I would have to help him, but I would deal only with him, not the parents
If it was cancer or something then yes, but with a drug addict if they can't help themselves then I have my doubts about any rehab working either. I know that sounds judgemental but my brother was an addict who died of an overdose and he and I had many friends on that path too, so it's what I believe to be generally true.
Stick to your guns brother. Be strong!
It's always the terminally selfish who accuse everyone else of being so.
Your wicked parents have had months to do what's right. They have refused. Therefore there will never be a single dollar given to them ever! Keep your money OP. Your Grandma wanted it this way.
So NTA, they passed some monumental red lines.
😊
Here is the line anyone should use on the shameless wastes of air who abused them and then genuflect and dither around trying to weasel out of admitting fault and owning up to their bad decisions in exchange for aid for themselves or a golden child. This like using the same kind of manipulation people like that use but more effective:
*_"If the situation is so serious, it should be an easy choice to swallow your pride and own up publicly. After all isn't helping [golden child] worth swallowing your pride over? Are you saying they aren't worth bowing the head and offering up a sincere apology?"_*
Questions are the best weapons to use on people. Even if they don't give you an answer they probably already have an answer in their head. Using questions can often even get them to cut through the bullshit faster because you may open up an avenue they haven't thought of. Never underestimate the power of questions.
I don’t understand parents like this. Our third child was diagnosed with a congenital heart condition before he was born. He underwent three open-heart surgeries before he was four years old and then later when he was around the third grade we discovered that he was dyslexic. We were in and out of doctors offices and had constant appointments for various things for him for years. But my husband and I were focused on one thing- treating our son like a regular kid so that he didn’t grow up thinking he was fragile or weak. We did everything we could to make sure all of our kids were treated the same regardless of whatever medical issues they needed and I’d like to think this paid off years later since now that he’s an adult he and his siblings don’t look at each other with disdain as if we’ve singled one out as the golden child. They were all expected to do chores and work hard in school no exceptions. They are all now well adjusted hard working adults because of this.
I love how they’re sending all the pathetic pictures to OP. Hello! He offered to help! But there’re too proud to except it!?!?
Op should have said why are you coming to me for help? We aren't family. Lol would have ended it right there.
How much you wanna bet that the most emotional support the brother ever got from their parents was when they would out OP down and wishing OP could be normal like their perfect son.
These people sound like the kind of "parents" that live to brsg about their children to others, but are only ever happy as long as the kid is achieving something new for them to brag about.
Sounds like brother also felt unloved by their parents, and similarly started acting out to vent frustration and to get their attention. And now they want to "fix him" not help him so he can go back to giving them things to brag about.
The parents are selfish because they don't want to admit their wrongdoings.
Op do'se your brother want help as if he doesn't then going in to rehabilitation won help. He has to reach the bottom a want help. If anyone tries to make him as soon as he comes out he will go straight back to the drugs. I'm glad you're finally free of your family. Take care of yourself and be happy
My question to OP, when they came begging to share you inheritance, a simple and stern NO would have ended all this unwanted drama, instead of stirring up the pot, asking them to apologize in public in return to share the inheritance. Why provoke and stir a stinking $hitpot, when you can live a peaceful life by cutting them out of your life once and forever.
Asking them apologize publicly to share your inheritance is idiocy and stupidity. They didn't exist in your life for the last 10 years, and why do you want to associate with such lowlives who threw you like a used tissue paper.
It's actually a good tactic, because if OP says no they just ask again, and again, and again. But this way, every time they ask, you bring up the condition and they have to face up to the reality of what they did, so either OP gets to keep reminding them of what they did and why his answer is no, or they fuck off. Win win.
On seeing the picture: that’s not my brother, you’re not my parents. That ended the day they dropped OP off at grandmas.
It is sad when there are children who do bad things or whatever to get the attention from their parents who are not giving them any. And I mean like this. But these "parents" absolutely did nothing. Not even a reprimanded to OP during the time growing up
All OP was, just empty
Rehab can only work if the addict wants to quit his addiction. And if the brother really wanted to get help he would have been fine with a local hospital/ rehab institution. He wouldn’t have needed a fancy one.
Those brats should have been locked up for abuse and child abandonment.
Op was looking for trouble with her parents.
I so sorry you where not treated well by your parents they didn't offer you the help you needed they had their golden child without problems your problems was medical and they could have assisted you but in the end they picked the wrong child
I sure you will go far thanks to your grandmother, your parents can take no credit for your success
They want the inheritance because your brother a failure I would refuse point blank they reared him so they screwed up I say go to hades ,they could be lying to you
Ever thought of taking your brother ans sending him to a rehab in the desert and force him to shun them because they destroyed your brother I say they put pressure on him to excess
They lost two children due to their self-centredness! Tsk, tsk.
My brother pisses on our parents' graves. I chose to just move thousands of miles away.
Tell parents you can’t help them They are the ones responsible for your brother’s situation They abandoned you and are now trying to intimidate you into taking care of their son Not your problem Stat strong and don’t give into their harassment You are not selfish and they are the AH’s not you or your grandmother
Why do you care what other people think? A public apology for money means nothing. Keep your money
and cut contact. They'll just come back for more.
I would help my brother. My brother died of an overdose. An inpatient lockdown program would've saved his life.
Maybe. Maybe not. I know you wish with all your heart that your brother could have been saved. However, he had to want to be saved. Being in lock down might have actually damaged his mental health which was probably not good anyways due to the drug addiction.
I had a grandfather who was an alcoholic and a mean one too. Addicted to alcohol. He literally drank himself to death. He literally died in a gutter on the street. You cannot help someone who resists being helped. They will go back to their addiction time and time again.
I wouldn’t deal with the parents. 20:43
For some reason the song FREAK ON A LEASH started playing in my head after i heard this story?
When the dad did that op should HD I YALL SHOULD KNOW! Didnt they like op in the room . SO LOCK THE BROTHER IN HIS ROOM AND HOPE HE GET BETTER
Another story where the OP is kicked out of family by parents. OP should have told his/her parents:
Not my circus. Not my monkeys.
Go kick rocks!
Grandma did not want my brother nor you (parents) to have any of her inheritance. I am following Grandma's wishes.
Being 60 is not old. The way this story talks about 60, it seems like they mean 80.
Actually, my mother was a very spry old lady in her 80s. She is still alive and now 96. Not spry physically but not senile.
Do you think they are staging the pictures?
OP is TA but she earned the right to be ... Some people deserve to get the AH treatment and OP's parents are those kind of people . THey treated OP like dirt and eventually the same towards OP's grand mother (father's mom) and in the end only recconected with OP to get some of the money OP's grandmother left OP in order to help their golden child .
So yes OP is the AH but rightfully deserves to be one.
🤗👍
5:34 ahh when being locked in a room was a punishment. Now there’s video games, cell phones, and thousands of shows on streaming services. Being locked in your room these days is a luxury vacation
Do you think he had any entertaining items in her room. I mean he was neglected entreated is unwanted. I'm not exactly sure what he would have in her room that could keep her entertained for a week if he didn't buy it herself at 14.
Some people enjoy being outside.
Op should have said why are you coming to me for help? We aren't family. Lol would have ended it right there.