I am an educated professional. Hired 2 coaches on separate occasions. One had a professional degree!! Both lacked integrity and were only accountable to the money and not me as an individual. It was a huge disappointment. "Renting a friend" is an accurate description. The friendship only lasts as long as you pay!
I felt that way about counselors too. My longest relationship with a counselor was 15 years, and even with his PHD he was a sham and high on the Narcissism spectrum. Some counselors are worth it, and some coaches are too.
A lot of doctors who don’t neither. You can be anyone and not have your life or finances together including billionaires. Life Coaching is much more about helping people overcome their limited thinking and align themselves with their core values.
Some if not most of them I believe are. Otherwise how can you be so over-confident, at least on the surface, as of to take responsibility for sb's life.
Have a look at dr grande's post about mental health professionals who have mental health issues. He states that a huge number have narcissist tendencies and these are trained professionals. I think that you need to check a lot of things, qualifications, recommendations and how you feel about your counsellor yourself. Even if there's no issues with the counsellor, you just may not gel. It's about yourself, making choices, being proactive in your wellbeing and who you're comfortable with.
I dealt with a life coach that was a complete narcissist. He thought he had all the answers and was never wrong. As long as everyone agreed with him he was nice. As soon as you saw through his con and pointed out anything he would turn on you and turn others against you. And by you I mean me. He was a false preacher that believed in Prosperity Gospel and Law of Attraction. For a pastor, these things are incompatible. So glad to be out of his control. Beware of life coaches that think they have all the answers, for nobody can know everything.
I believe in the law of attraction and practice every day but I can tell you after trying to connect with others, 99% don't understand how it works. They think- oh If I just sit here and envision the BMW, it'll appear in my driveway magically. That's not how it works. The law of attraction does 2 things: First of all it helps you focus only on the good things in your life so that the bad stuff isn't a big deal. For example, when I had a car accident, I wasn't mad at all. I focused on the positives- that nobody was hurt- and it wasn't a stressful situation at all, and I was able to happily go about my life, rather than dwelling on the inconvenience and trauma of it. Second- it gives you motivation to keep going and keep working to be able to get the BMW in your driveway. I really wanted to be self employed and debt free. So I lived my life in abundance. I had the attitude that I was debt free. I enjoyed simple luxuries- I pretended that basic things were luxurious. And I am now debt free. But it takes work, not wishing and magic. Pretending I was living in luxury gave me the motivation every day to get up and triple my sales and my income. So while I pretended I was super rich for drinking coffee and eating bagels, I was paying off my bills. How did I make coffee feel luxurious? No, I did not buy $4 Starbucks every day. All I did was set the timer on my coffee pot so that it was ready for me when I woke up. It made me feel like it was being served to me. So very simple things can put you in the right mindset to achieve those bigger goals. And I'm rambling because it's covid and I never talk to anyone and all my friends are cats. :)
I am a coach, I have a psyche degree and I am a trained counsellor. But I have chosen to be a coach. If I have a client with mental health issues, I stand aside and advise my client to approach their GP or I will refer the client to mental health services myself. I find it immoral and unethical to work with a vulnerable person who is in desperate need of a mental health professional.
Ann P Tully : Exactly. There is a legitimate place for well educated life coaches. Many of us hold other degrees in helping professions. There are some incredibly ignorant responses to Grande's original post. I decided to stop frustrating myself after reading a few. Anyway, yes, refer to mental health those who need a doctor. I agree. And let intelligent adults choose practirioners who produce RESULTS. Marriage counseling has failed miserably.
@@raymorrow1491 If I may draw an analogy, why might someone work as a sports coach or personal trainer if they had an MD? Although the more regulated work requiring the higher degree of education and license may be more respected and well-paid, it may not be the preference of the individual to do that sort of work, to work with that particular population, to work for an institution, and/or to comply with the ongoing requirements of the more highly regulated industry
My experience of life coaches is that they encourage you to make bold decisions by building up your sense of invincibility. The actions are all entirely at your own risk, with absolutely no risk to themselves either financially or emotionally. I do believe in being in harmony with the Universe, but I wouldn't pay someone to tell me to jump off a cliff in order to see how harmonious we are.
I had 2 free sessions with a life coach through my work and it was a positive experience as it was tailored to professionalism & growing in my career. But this video did talk about distinctions that I wasn’t aware of!
It's extremely scary when a "life coach" goes around claiming that their "client " tells them that they saved their life in order to promote themselves. Sounds grandiose, self serving, controlling, manipulative and very narcissistic! Look how many are floating around You Tube looking for vulnerable people and donations. It's really disturbing in my book.
If feeds a person’s ego for others to look up to them and listen to what they have to say. So for those with self-esteem issues (like my cousin), it feeds her need for validation and to feel important.
My sister in law was a life coach for awhile. She had been unable to get a real job because she is a completely self absorbed little narcissist, so life coaching was a perfect fit. Now she’s a financial advisor😂
God it’s like a plague at the moment these life coaches, i just watch from a distance with my popcorn as to how stupid humans are buying into this scam. It does annoy me the coaches actually making good money though
Big scam in my opinion. The coaches I've met were intellectually underwhelming. I think those who want tp help people can study psychology, social work or even yoga. But something completely unregulated, no. And evenen someone with a degree may suck at the job.
A lot of coaches I have met cannot prove excellence in anything they coach. They fall short in all aspects of their coaching. So I just don't understand, how can you coach if you aren't a living proof of what you are coaching? I don't mind getting coached by a real estate Billionaire of how to make real estate deals, or by a doctor of how to take care of my body. Even that, some will not be accurate, but at least the chances are better if they have mastered something!
@@Dareen.K Right? They'll "help you build a successful business / build your dream life", when they're broke and struggling themselves / their life is a dumpster fire. Make it make sense!
This video is gold! It’s a pleasure seeing your humor come through. I’m literally laughing out loud. I’m studying art therapy & my dearest friend is a licensed clinical psychologist. We have had this conversation countless times. I really enjoyed listening to your perspective on this topic. Keep up the good work!
I am a licensed social worker and have a life coach. She went through a long term certification, I think 2 years. She is very helpful with accountability and goal setting. It’s not therapy but it’s helpful. She is very transparent as to her role... I think we all need to be careful who we go to for whatever it may be.
Let's bump this comment to the top! Life coaches are valuable. If properly trained, they can be a reflection of our subconscious beliefs that we don't normally have access to. Plus, many coaches are trained in techniques such as NLP, hypnotherapy, EFT, etc. which are all extremely helpful for our wellbeing.
"Renting a friend" did make me laugh because I was anticipating that response to come out at some point in the video due to the route it was moving towards. I have heard of life coaching, but I never would have compared it to counseling in the sense that if I need professional help that I'd go to a life coach. I can see where a life coach would be beneficial for some, but if someone is truly struggling with mental illness, it is best to seek a counselor. Thank you for the video!
There is a real distinction between coaching and counseling: A counselor works with the unhealthy part of a person and the coach works with the healthy part of the person, whenever I interview a new potential client, I asked them after they explained what they are trying to cope with, is this preventing you from functioning on a daily basis? If they say say, mostly yes, then I refer them to seek counseling, if they reply with, no, I can function, just wished that there was a better way to move forward, then have dive deeper into what kind of coaching they would benefit from. To say that executive coaching is the same as business coaching or life coaching is wrong on all levels. The fact that it's an unregulated sector gives it flexibility, and freedom of discovery. Often clients have commented on how much farther and deeper I was able to bring them to find their own solutions than any counseling that they took before. Many say that counseling actually prevented them to move forward, as they were tired of rehashing the same old each year. Regulatory body is important, however, it has to be an integrated system. Counseling, therapy & coaching & workshops have to work together with the client. Can't keep buying the client it's weekly fish, give him a rod to borrow, teach him or her to fish, clean it, cook it and experience living life again. In the last I was part of the pilot project of dual diagnosis as the life coach, nowadays its known as Concurrent Disorders. I have supported inmates to integrate into their community who were diagnosed with Concurrent Disorders, I have supported people with disabilities and Concurrent Disorders in my home as well as a day program provider. I have been part of Forensic Psychiatric team in the Forensic Psychiatric Hospital in BC. Because of my coaching training, I can work with all walks of life, however, just like a counselor, one must choose their niches and master them and keep learning, just because I know how to coach, doesn't mean I can stop learning how to coach better
You know the life coach is bogus when they give advice. The whole point is to pull the inner resources out and allow them to work techniques and processes in order to make more efficient choices in their lives.
You clearly don't understand coaching if you think giving advice is a bad thing. The majority of modern therapy is sadly majorly flawed and of little use.
@@melymichu6731 As a therapist, I have to disagree. Therapists do two things: they bring out traumatic events for healing, and they teach new, healthier coping skills. The latter does involve “giving advice.” We may be cautious in how we present the advice (e.g. what if you tried this instead of that), but rest assured, it’s still advice.
@@Longtack55 If the client had the "answers/solutions", they would not be paying someone upwards of $100, to go there. Most people only go to someone else, when they cannot solve their own problem.
I really wish there was some outside sociological research or studies on the industry so that evaluations on Life Coaching (positive, negative, and nuanced) would be less anecdotal than they are currently.
We are talking about an industry that is completely self certified, there are no regulating bodies establishing standards and practices or accountability. It's like New Age practitioners operating with licenses from various schools
I’m applying to grad school for counseling and you took the words right out of my mouth. Excellent video with well put information. Keep up the videos, they are very informative and explanatory.
I've used both. I found my life coach to be extremely helpful. I had basically no expectations, but they really helped me reach my goals. Part of what I like about a life coach is that they're not afraid to get into helping you make life decisions, something that a counselor won't do. I've also been to therapy and that's very helpful but in a totally different way.
If they’re really making decisions for you, you’re simply codependent upon them. As a vulnerable teenager I befriended a guy online that was a life coach, and all he did was live vicariously through me. At the time everything felt right, but I was simply taking too much risk and ignoring intuition. I let him possess me in a way, but I enjoyed the ride. I’m happy that you’ve found someone who helps you but don’t ever be afraid to question what they stand for. Know yourself and what you stand for or someone’s traumatized inner child may decide who you are for you.
@@dancegod1691 "ignoring intuition". The way you phrased this was very helpful to me! When I read that, I realized that this has been a huge part of my problem for a very long time. In wanting to give people the "benefit of the doubt" like I've been taught my whole life, I've often ignored my own intuition, which was trying to help me avoid bad situations, relationships, and a lot of pain. Thanks for commenting and sharing your views. This was helpful to me.
THAT is scary, because I bet you they aren't better than you in what they are coaching. You just needed a listening ear, but then you got someone that thinks they have the power to make life decisions for you. What an ego stroke for them!
I see many people are finding this alarming. I found it to be quite helpful. I used a life coach for a few weeks to help me stay motivated, and I landed my dream job, and then that was it, job done.
The problem wiith you saying your life coach helped you reach your goals is that its anecdotal, so even if your opinion of your life coach was accurate (another issue in itself since humans lie to themselves frequently) its probably not typical or valuable as an example
"renting a friend that can be supportive" LOL it is SO validating to hear you say all of this. I USED to be friends with someone who is now a life coach. She RIPS people off & me & her ex husband have been wondering if she is a narcissist & definitely feel like she is. But she believes her own shit! Exactly how she can be unscrupulous. She thinks she is awesome at life but she lies and she lost a best friend and her husband, which apparently she wanted to anyhow. She sucked. Thanks for doing this.
@@thecarlitosshow7687 There’s inadequacies the other way too. And because of insurance companies, a practitioner can charge higher rates than they’d be able to otherwise.
This video touches on some great points about the difference between life coaching and counseling. I wondered myself especially with the influx of tv shows and programs for a fee. Dr. Grande touched on what I feel to be the most significant point which is regulation. Without the techniques and practices being regulated someone could slap the label on anything and call it “help”. Counseling being a profession that requires school and training makes the two completely different.
Couldn’t agree more. Boundaries and clarity are a real issue. I wonder if life coaches are able to reflect upon their own process and recognise when they are hooked into someone’s material when it mirrors their own.
"Harness the power of the universe. Well, that's a lot of energy. What would you do with all that energy?" Omg, that delivery! XD Dr Grande is so unintentionally hilarious sometimes. So f***ing cute! 😍
I was once inspired by a life coach who motivated me to be positive with everyone. With that positive attitude I approached a malignant narcissist, and then I managed to survive. Trust me, it was a bad idea!!! And now I'm negative with everyone!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I went to a life coach for my anxiety and depression. Felt better in five sessions and felt almost healed in ten. I got tired of the traditional talk therapy. After twenty sessions of venting and "how does that make you feel?" I got annoyed and knew I needed something different.
The challenge with mental health professionals is that, since they are human, they each have a different style. I have had 3 or 4 that I only had 2 or 3 sessions with and then switched to someone else. It is hard when your counselor retires or moves and then you have to look for someone new. All that just to say, they're not all the same.
Great topic and insight. Life coaching seems to be the show business off-shoot of mental health. That aspect perhaps couldn't stop you from using dry humour in your usually austere delivery. Really interesting Dr Grande
Dr. Grande, I have enjoyed your videos. You have a nice style that appears very grounded in science and research, which in my opinion a professional should always be. Your analysis of life coaching was excellent. Here is the issue I see with life coaches... they invariably seem at one time or another to cross the line over to "therapy or counseling" and into the realm of professional counselors or psychologists without that training or licensure. This in my opinion can be dangerous. Now, that is not to say that some of the things life coaches say or suggest does not necessarily parallel what we do as professional doctors, or even help people as you point out, however, being unregulated there seems a greater potential for harm. I especially like your take on developmental maturity. Our licensing boards, at least in my opinion, and i am being general here, need to take a stronger look at regulation simply because given the type and minimal number of hours needed to be a coach, there is always the danger of venturing into uncharted or untrained professional waters, if you take my meaning. Again, thank you for your videos, please keep doing them. My deepest respects sir.
It can be very true. However, there can be licensed or educated professionals who act unscrupulously and ineffectively as well. While they might be in possession of a license or within the boundaries of regulations, they can still act inappropriately, scam people, and the like.
Yesss! It’s down right dangerous. There is a life coach on TH-cam that specializes in adult children who grew up being narcissistically abused. She runs a 12 week program. She asks you to unlock your childhood trauma, along with another 100 to 200 members, and once you have achieved this you are pretty much screwed, open wounds and no one to help you deal with the infection of pain it creates. She keeps repeating if people don’t like what you say then it’s their problem, not yours, in this way she creates really self absorbed members who feel entitled to say what they want without taking accountability for their hurtful words. It really screwed with my head. I so wanted to belong that I went along with it all and was swept away by the cult like hype of this lady (who has threatened to sue members who speak out about her) I’ve reviewed her on google maps wand so have a few other brave ex members but she is incredibly narcissistic and denies and deflects. This year one of her members set themselves on fire and died, this has to stop! She charges $1000 to do her 12 week, then another $$$$ for master class then $$$ for her warrior membership sight per month, then $$$ cruises and she doesn’t stop. She gloats of her fabulous life and beautiful new kitchen on video while some of her members are not sure where their next meal will come from, or where their next beating will hit. She claims to teach you how to manifest these things like she has. How do we stop this? It’s criminal for sure.
@@irispect6565 thank you for your opinion, in my opinion you opinion is were informative and my opinions have evolved and changed due your opinion. Thanks
@@irispect6565 I have to disagree. I've watched many TH-cam videos from different people covering Narcissism, and I've found that Romano knows her stuff. She has definitely been abused and knows the behaviors and patterns of people with Narcissism higher on the spectrum. Many do not, and actually cause more damage. That being said, there are many licensed professionals that cause more damage because they themselves are not versed in the behavior patterns of Narcissism, nor are they even aware of the various types. When in school to become a psychologist, the only information on cluster B personality disorders comes from the criteria of the DSM-5, which is in dire need of being updated. It only describes the garden variety Narcissist, and only one type. To learn of the more nefarious types, the psychologist in school needs to be going for criminal psychology. That's why the majority of licensed psychologists are useless in helping victims and survivors of Narcissistic abuse. So, there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone calling themselves a coach that specializes in helping from Narcissistic abuse. And there's no reason a coach with experience, such as Romano has, can't be effective in that realm. I get that you feel like she rips people off and charges too much money , and that she's getting wealthy doing so. That also doesn't make her a charlatan. The gloating, or what appears to be Narcissistic when she shows off her new kitchen, etc, is something that many survivors do when we have schadenfreude towards our abusers ( Also natural) and we want them to see we are having a great life. Its actually quite normal, as having a great life post Narcissist is the best revenge. As a survior myself, I know what kind of brain fog you have to get through to be able to ascertain what happened to you and then be able to articulate in such a way that it makes sense. It's not easy. It's alot of work to get there emotionally. She's obviously done the work. And she SHOULD charge for her more personalized services. I give her credit that she has taken what was the darkness in her life ( abuse and abusive people ) and turned it into a way to sustain her life and to become successful with it. And really, why shound she spend years and be in financial debt for who know how long from laying tuition to a college where she wont even get the necessary curriculum to treat survivors of Narcissistic abuse anyway? Really, only those that have experienced the abuse can understand it, so getting a degree in this case is fruitless. Anyway, all of us surviors should be so lucky to make a career out of what our abuserstried to destroy us with. So, in my opinion, she is one of the most informed non psychologists on TH-cam that definitely knows what she is talking about and I listen to her, along with Dr. Ramani.
Thank you for this video. If I scroll by another video on facebook by a self proclaimed "life coach" that tells us that we'll all die of cancer if we don't forgive the perpetrators of our past trauma, my eyes might finally roll so hard that they pop out. They never even tell us HOW to forgive, just that we need to. And that if we don't, we're toxic people. But if we pay $200 for a 1 hour webcam session with them, they'll tell us the secret to forgiveness. $200 is 3 times the amount I pay my actual licensed therapist to spend an hour with me helping to actually process my trauma. I've seen a pattern of "life coaches" regurgitating rhetoric that has no basis in actual psychology or psychiatric research. I'm done with hearing "life coaches" claim that the natural emotion of anger as a reaction to a traumatic event is something the suffering individual should feel guilty about. I'm done with victim blaming phrases like "If you can't love yourself, you can't love anyone else. And if you can't love others, they can't truly love you". I'm done with victim blaming ideologies like "You've been abused because you allowed yourself to be abused". As if it's not a deeply more insidious issue rooted in childhood trauma. I'm astounded that "life coaching" still remains unregulated. I'm sure it helps some, but the majority of what i've observed has been their favorite word to use: toxic. I was reading a book recently that said something that made me think of exactly how dangerous "life coaches" can be: This is a quote from The Narcissistic Family: Diagnosis and Treatment by Stephanie Donaldson-Pressman and Robert Pressman, both clinical psychologists. "In our experience, the pressure to forgive the perpetrator often gets in the way of genuine recovery. As it can act to shut off the patient's neccessary expression of anger and self validation of feelings." In other words, focus more on your healing first. Forgiveness may come naturally after that, or it might not. They do not feel as though forgiveness is necessary for the healing process. But yet, it is so common among "life coaches" that that's the first thing they want you to do. They want you to get to the top of the mountain before climbing it, and for you to pay them $200+ an hour for it. Can you imagine standing in front of a mountain, being told not to climb it, but the person standing next to you saying "you can do it!" takes $200 for every hour passed that you haven't reached the top of the mountain yet?
Geekella If you truly listen to what they say, they don’t say anything. I once asked, “but what does that mean?” And I got a narcissistic stare that creeped me out.
I agree. I used to be in a number of facebook support groups for mental health disorders, but they became overwhelmed by life coaches trying to drum up business by exploiting people who were obviously in a vulnerable state. The fact that these coaches go to groups specifically for mental disorders shows that they have no moral compass or ethical standards. They are not qualified mental health professionals and offered advice such as "get outside in nature and exercise" or "change your diet, change your mental health" as cures for depression/anxiety. they are bottom dwelling scum looking to profit off of people's trauma.
Geekella I see a psychiatrist regularly. He’s really funny( not that this is a requirement of a good therapist!) and when I express my anger about how I was treated/past events etc he really encourages me. I get very frustrated with this idea of forgiveness . My diet fil was a total bastard. He’s dead now and I still hate that fucker. There has never been the merest hint that I should be forgiving him and that’s just how I like it
@@griffox actually that's very correct advice, BUT I would highly doubt ever enough. ;-) (and I'm saying this as a trained counsellor who has also been a part of a program that focus on helping people with depression and anxiety specifically.) I think that's another danger with some life coaches; they mix truth with error and then people lose faith in the truth because it doesn't work!
I’ve known two people who became life coaches. Two people I kept at arms length as they are dangerously fucked up individuals. Life coaches fit perfectly in the dietitian/nutritionalist confusion. I am relieved to see in the comments that a lot of people have sussed it out as mainly a scam. This doesn’t take away the fact that many do it with good intentions but the risks are too high for some people.
Really agree with your opinion. The entry level really is too low. Though I think harnessing is not about power over others just power over your mind and yourself. A honest life coach would not take a client if they have to deal with mental illness if they are not educated treating it. A good life coach should focus on encouraging clients to focus on their dreams that connect with their soul and help them get closer to it with real life action plans. But as you mentioned, it’s vulnerable to scam. Therefore a potential client should not believe in high promise but in their own feelings about the coach. :)
Michael Smallwood I’ve read a lot of Carl Jung, and I think Peterson exploitsJung’s ideas and bends then to shape Peterson’s schist worldview. I’ve meaning to watch Dr. Todd’s video. Now there is a scholar who is making a difference!
Great video! Thanks Dr. Grande. It's the first video in which you show you're also having a great sense of humour. "Learning how to unharness my inner narcissist" for 1000 USA dollars an hour by someone who isn't a licensed counselor and did a 3 hour Life Couching training? No, thank you very much 😂😂😂 I rather prefer to listen for free to the videos of Dr. Grande in which we learn a lot we can use in our personal battles with mental health issues and in discovering the 'harness narcissists" we unfortunately have to deal with nowadays in this society so often. A Happy Christmas to everyone who is a big fan of this TH-cam channel 🎅🌲☃
oh my gosh this is so great, especially about the ambiguous buzz words. please please do a video on self help books! the most popular ones say that “the universe will provide all your needs” and weird stuff like that that just confuses people and make them feel like failures for not being able to live up to all the promises those books make. causing more problems that didn’t previously exist for the reader. so damaging but the industry keeps growing and growing and unqualified people keep making best seller lists and misleading people.
I think life coaching may be helpful for people who have immediate problems they want to solve or goals they want to set and they need that extra push or guidance from someone who can help them navigate through that process. Whereas I view the counseling process as dealing with deeper issues and gaining coping mechanisms. I also think as counselors we have to be careful in not being condescending towards other practices outside of our own so that we don't shame others or even potential clients they may want to participate in counseling and life coaching.
I think I would tend to agree with you on this point Elysha. There definitely is a place for both specializations. THe only concern is the chance of misrepresentation as to what that may entail for the client who assumes this is the same thing as counseling.
I don't think life coaching is a scam, I believe in some ways it can be helpful. It can be used to motivate people or assist them in their careers perhaps. It's not on the same level or scale as professional counseling as this takes years of education and training. For me the problem is when life coaches cross the line into counseling without proper credentialing. They could do a lot of harm to an individual that needs specialized care. I've never heard of it said like "renting a friend" but it does now fit that description! Thanks for the video.
Thank you for pointing out that the benefits associated with life coaching should not be discounted. Full disclosure of the service descriptions both what life coaching is and what it is not would be ideal.
This video was a great way to look at life coaching versus the mental health profession and how to discern between the two. I appreciated Dr. Grande's disclosure of his bias toward counseling. His argument was quite compelling. I enjoyed the poking of fun regarding summoning the inner narcissist and renting a friend. However, he did point out the fact that training for life coaching can be as simple as a 3-hour seminar whereas counseling requires years of education, testing, and licensure. He also pointed out that some life coaches have the tendency to spill over into the field of counseling with no real knowledge of how to refer or deliver treatment. I do believe that life coaching can come in the form of motivational speaking but it is important to know where and what in which to invest time, money, and energy.
I see a lot of bias in this video. I also see lack of understanding how the coaching is working and what it really is. You are mixing motivational speakers or some really 'interesting' specialists after three hours of training with real, solid coaching practice . My advice would be to understand first thing which you are going to speak about instead of talking about it from one particular point of view. I belive that this relation between coaching and therapy is a spectrum and in my mind it boils down to the question - what is health? Is it only lack of illness as therapist are looking at this or it's something more? There is whole part of psychology full of people who are talking about potential of human being like carl Rogers, Abraham Maslow, Alfred Adler from whom coaching practice is taking a lot from. Coaching has theoretical support in many areas of psychology, not only psychology but also neurobiology. To understand it better there is a great book - 'Coaching with the Brain in Mind: Foundations for Practice' I highly reccommend it to really go deep in this topic instead of just gloss over it.
Hey Doc. I like the video. I think you did touch on some key points. I think there is some bias in your statement (understandably) but in any case I feel it is all based on what a person needs. There are people out there that do not need therapy as they are not going through any trauma or diagnosed for PTSD or drug or alcoholic abuse. At this point life coaches can be beneficial to help people who simply want to overcome obstacles and limiting beliefs in order to have a better overall quality of life. It’s not a “ rent a friend” service. If that were the case, every friend I’ve had would still be in my life which ain’t the case. And yes there are plenty of negative influences in people’s lives. How do I know? Being a trainer and former bouncer.
Great topic!!! theres alot of people out there that im sure have no idea what their doing and act like they do and scam and can also mentally hurt other vulnerable people.
Thank you so much one more time, Dr Grande. I'd been thinking about that topic for some time. In the end, I agree with you 100% and I feel validated after watching one more of your incredibly helpful videos. I'm pretty much in the end of my recovery from narcissist abuse, I suppose, and like some people I would like to help other targets. I thought about taking a coaching course but gave up for the reasons you mentioned: I came to notice it might be full of opportunistic narcissists, which I can live without lol. After months of continuous research, and support from friends and other victims, I'm seriously considering doing that, specially after so many failed attempts to find a qualified professional in the area. The way I see it, with little to no empathy and knowledge, most of them retraumatize the targets in CPTSD. That's simply ridiculous and cruel. However, I know about my limitations,, i know I need to dedicate and study much more psychology and treatments. I really feel like helping, at least informing, people about it, but I'm aware I'm not gonna change the world, of course. Thank you so very much for all your videos. They're priceless and a lifesaver. I hope you never stop.❣😎🍀 Thank you one more time, Dr Grande.
Bless you Todd. I love your you tube channel, and I think you're a star. But I just feel I need to add that in the UK I know of so, so many truly genuine, heart centred, authentic life coaches who hope to support their clients reach their goals. For non academic lay people, the language of the life coach may be just what the client / person need to try. And whilst many life coaches do charge quite high amounts, which they explain to their clients is an 'investment' towards the future 'growth' of the client, please remember that life coaches themselves normally partake in long term life coaching themselves. There's a potentially huge feel good factor to connecting with the right life coach who maybe doesn't have the academic medical model style graduate qualifications, but have a heart centre personality that many ordinary people need in today's day and age. Most life coaches won't survive in the uk unless they have a credible track record. And for the person / client, paying for a life coach or two or three its surely no different from say spending money on a new outfit, holiday or car....its the client's risk and choice, and if say a life coach can help a person think about how to stop self-sabotaging their life, and walk a more positive, productive, goal directed path, then what harm is that. Yes their will always be narcissistic con artists out their, but certainly in the UK, some highly intelligent, non academic life coaches exist to fill the gaps where their personality skills can be put to good use as a life coach specialising in whatever areas they feel competent enough to life coach in. For me counselling and therapy work (which feels more clinical mental health medical model) is a very different thing from the range of creative methods that life coaches can utilise. Sorry to waffle on. I do absolutely love your you tube channel, and think you are a star - a reasonable guy, beautifully intelligent and scientifically informed x ( but yes, there are a lot of egotistic, narcissistic, know-it-alls out there to be avoided and not manipulated by...and doubtless some may have invented themselves as life coaches, so people beware! ) x
This video kind reminds me of the movie The King’s Speech. Sometimes it requires less convention methods, or someone who thinks outside the AMA box to help others. I would be interested in how much damage is actually done by the use of life coaches as opposed to trained counselors/psychologists/psychiatrists. I would imagine that truly disturbed individuals do not seek the help of life coaches and if they do, I would hope that those life coaches would send them on to the appropriate medical treatment. I have a loved one who was in the care of a licensed counselor and she ended up sending him to a psychiatrist. She knew she was in over her head. I’m sure there are a handful that wouldn’t do so, but I have to believe that most people that choose the field of helping others will and do recognize when a client/patient is in need of help that they are not prepared to provide.
I am not a life coach but as I was listening to your concerns and observations I did appreciate why this would be important to look at,as my first interest in finding out what I was going through came through researching on the internet the different clues that I had and trying to come to an conclusion,This platform has been very helpful because it seemed to me others whom I talked to did not understand what I, and many many others were going through, I appreciated that finally I have found something that makes sense and match’s up with what I was going through and I think it is a Grownup form of Bullying and the Advice that I heard (not from any one person) is some form of discipline DBT ? may work or at least help ;we needed help, and for this I am thankful.❤️💐🌈🤗🙏🏼
Good stuff! My ex roommate was a "life coach" who is 30+ years old and still parties it up like they are 18, and brought home random girls from the bar on occasion that he said were "high quality", proceeded to date for a couple months then move on, then get back with them randomly. He was also a pathological liar who did it to your face, and someone who if you didn't agree with them you would feel the wrath for days. Finally he tried giving me advice and I just couldn't help but laugh a little bit because it is true, ANYONE can become a "life coach". Even a dishonest, immature spoiled brat with low self-esteem. Interestingly enough, he would copy and immitate me quite often as well and then pretend like it wasn't happening. Yep, he was certainly releasing his inner narcissist on a daily basis. Spot on, Dr. Grande!
Life coaches do have training and certification, it's just there are no laws connected, so theoretically, someone can simply call themselves a "Life Coach" and set up shop. However, it has to be up to the public to make sure to seek out someone with certification and training, until there is some sort of legal requirement for licensure.
I have to agree. Many life coaches have no knowledge of psychology, having no ‘formal ‘ learning. I have been taking a degree in computer science, and after studying AI, I switched to study some psychology modules (I’ve read a lot about psychology and watched many documentaries and listened to many lectures, but, I have come to realise, when one is in control of their own trajectory in learning, much, essential learning, can be missed). and it’s really opened my eyes to the ‘inaccuracies ‘ out there. Inaccuracies that on the surface, make perfect sense, well they did to me. Now I’m starting to question everything. I’ve always been turned off by practices with no scientific value but it goes beyond that... I’m starting to see how nuanced the mind can be, and the ‘other’ explanations for the phenomena observed. Along side my degree, Ive been taking an EQ course and have started to look at NLP and CBT, I can see you have some videos on CBT, I’ll take a look. I’ve always been very attracted to intelligent and educated people with the attitude ‘I know nothing ‘ but it’s possible that.... ( Socrates?) I’m glad people like you are around to add another perspective into the mix Maybe you could cover some raw psychology, such as cognitive bias, implicit biases, conflict, self-esteem, projection, projective identification, attachment, trauma... I’ll think of a load more 😁 to move the conversation over to a more, responsible understanding. ( Responsible as in to take responsibility.) Question everything is my new mantra. Thanks for the videos Dr G 👍🏻😊
Im a homemaker made and design to be with parents, friends and children.its been a hectic day to start for this indepence day in my country , a friend of my suggesting of cooking special meals for today.the food is great and we are happy about it.the voice of the prime minister still can be heard in my ears, the vision are clear and well presented.if looking ahead its the next generation is very important and cant take for granted.everything is done special to help the needs of the old and young people. It is always to hope for the best leaders for the next few years to making the country great again.
I think on the maturation side of things your concerns might be conflating the role of a counselor and a life coach. On the problematic end of things this is certainly true... but only if a life couch is trying to be a counselor. Hypothetical example: Let's say you have a retiree who spent his life in efficiency and business improvement careers. He has industry certifications like Six Sigma and other trainings that combine with his MBA to constitute more than 8 years of traditional schooling. In his retirement years, he opens a life coaching business that focuses exclusively on time management and on site physical home/work organisation using internationally-recognized efficiency programs. One could argue that his professional life experience is better suited to providing that specific life skill than going to a therapist and that getting a counselor degree would not help make him a better life-organizer.
I think this kind of cross-discipline coaching where a coach with experience in a very specific life skill specialization (time management, organization, etiquette, personal style, home economics, etc) is probably the best scenario that this industry provides.
@@DrGrande I don't think that minimizes the cases covered in your original concern... it just provides for plausable alternate cases that are not so problematic. Your point is still valid in many cases: there is a definite danger of people confusing their passion for something with expertise. There is no substitute for experience. Along those lines, a criticism that you could have levied in this video is one of continuing education. In most cases in most places, regulated certification-based service industries require regular ongoing training to remain current and sharp in the profession. Unregulated services like life coaching do not have this requirement so it is much easier to be "rusty" or "out of the loop" regarding advances when it comes to unregulated fields.
@@DrGrandeGreat content! There are a lot of scam courses out there but i want to become a coach helping ppl who are suffering with stress. i have spent thousands on courses including studying online with a world class therapist who has now crossed over into coaching. I've spent years in training but i don't want to cross over into mental health. Were would you say the line should be for me to recognise the difference between some1 suffering with stress and some1 with mental health problems?
@@lagerandapacketcrisp stress is a mental health problem. I'd be very careful about the way you offer your service and the sorts of advice that you give regarding stress.
Thanks a lot, I am right now doing a life coach course and thought of training others, but thanks to you, I will not do it right now. I have to settle myself first and become something worthy.. I must have right credentials to coach others... Thanks a lot..
I find is strange that you do not differentiate between counselling and coaching. Coaching is education and guidance, positive psychology if you will. Counselling assumes mental health challenges. Completely disparate topics. By the way there are plenty of highly qualified counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists that are extremely poor at their job. Just as there is the potential for an outstanding life coach to have minimal formal qualifications. A piece of paper guarantees nothing.
I am a life coach and I approve this message. Life coaching is coaching, not counseling. There are some coaches out there who have a goal of SALES before results, that is true too. BE SELECTIVE! But there is maturity that comes from living, learning, and applying lessons. And there is the desire to help others avoid the mistakes that you made. I coach people who need and seek help in dating and relationships, I do not attempt to solve mental health issues. I have read a lot, and studied a lot, (and lived A LOT) and I have noticed one common theme: Men who are virgins (monks/spiritualists) or have only been with 1 or 2 partners (some counselors) giving advice on dating and relationships. While "life coaches" may lack certain types of training, these types mentioned above lack real world experience. I learned a long time ago not to take dating advice from people like that. YET i still respect and consume the scientific research, with a grain of salt.
Someone like yourself KNOWS what they are talking about. Yes education and going through all the hard hard work youve been through. I know your not just spewing whatever just to sound good, i really know already you are absolutely credible.
Coaching job is like holding a hand of someone who has decided to become somebody in life, such as profession, or striving a business goals, personal achievement. And, in my opinion, that is absolutely fine. As long as a Coach doesn’t enter the area of profession of a Mental Doctor, psychology or any other specialist of this industry, than it is perfectly fine. Coach in my opinion, it is a bit like a Priest vs School Teacher. Both are important for the society, but one holds a degree, the other, not. However, there is space for everyone in this world. I think, they compliment each other. Anyone of them, keep people, out of failures, disappointments, crime and try to fit some people who doesn’t know that they are valuable for them selves and their loved ones. If you have a passion, love and patience, good communication skills, and you are CRB checked by the authorities. You are mentally fit, have no record of crime, than you have clean integrity, you should practice coaching by all means. At the end of the day, it is just a service, and if you are not good at it, people will find out straight away, therefore you will be out of business. But, I do agree of some of the points and concerns, the honourable Dr is talking about
I have heard of Life Coaching before but never thought that people would use a Life Coach rather than a counselor. I think that the biggest concern, as Dr. Grande pointed out, would be someone going to see a Life Coach who has not had any training when they really need to see a counselor. If someone is really in distress and the Life Coach has no formal training, the harm that could come to the individual could be detrimental.
Jackie De Leonardis-Thompson I agree that there is a high potential for harm to be done but I don’t think people are seeking out life coaches to deal with every mental distress. I see people using life coaches more as hired friends or cheerleaders - someone who is going to agree with you and help you achieve a goal regardless of its healthy or not. I agree there is a chance of people taking advantage of vulnerable people because of the lack of regulation and training. But I really only ever here if the ‘elite’ or executives using this route of care
Watching videos like your channel and other channels have really helped me sort out lots of issues in my life. I appreciate all you do Dr. G! Hope you have a great holiday!
I always listen to people on TH-cam who are a good prospect to make sense, and consistency in what they say. As soon as I detect a discrepancy I never go to their channel again. There is one life coach I will listen to, three counselors, you one of them, and about ten narcissist subject speakers whatever they are called. Each one of them say the same information in a different way that is consistent while I learn about narcissm. They are along the same information lines you give out as well as the other counselors. I think they are doing a great job for those of us who can't see a counselor for whatever reason.
The problem with most life coaches is that most think they can just give advice and that's coaching. No, a good coach will help the individual to identify their very specific goal, help this individual excavate best possible solution from their current skill and to help develop on new ones, and execute this plan.
To be a life coach, you need to represent what you preach, you need to be successful prior to your life coaching business but most are just people that had no business ideas and they are really good at public speaking and motivating.
I do agree that the field can be sketchy, but I also think there are some gems out there that are doing a lot of good. I’m familiar with some life coaches who basically do CBT type stuff-analyzing your thoughts and how they relate to to your feelings and such. So I think life coaching can be good if you’re careful about who you work with.
Thanks for the video. I’m not in need of a life coach, thankfully, but I know some affected by/drawn to that field. There seems to be a set of hackneyed buzzwords and phrases that should be red flags to anyone looking for a coach. You touched on some of them. Others might be the highly suspicious “making six figures,” usually calculated with at least one decimal point, or “leave the 9-5 grind/work for yourself” which indicate an MLM agenda as well, ie the coach wants you to be a coach under their umbrella
I have been a registered psychologist for several decades. I have watched the development of ‘life coaching’ with interest and I have been particularly interested to observe colleagues enter this field. In every case I believe the career change was purely marketing, pandering to potential clients who are seeking help for their troubled lives. Yes, it’s a scam, and potentially a dangerous one.
This is really informative, thank you dr :) And also the comments here. Sometimes it's worth to wait a day watching these videos, because I also get a lot of information from people's comments :)
It sounds to me like these Life Coaches are nothing more than motivational speakers. Hey, I'm all for watching a business motivation video before my job in sales. But I am trying to find a secret MLM company, because the videos I see, all the Life Coaches talk about is how they used a Life Coach... to become a Life Coach, and they help others... be a Life Coach. If you're not actually helping someone do better in business or school, then that's a pyramid scheme.
Great, salient points. There are some good coaches out there, but many of them are stretching services into therapy, 'working on trauma' with clients, etc. In both counseling and coaching, I find most certifications are meaningless. There are exceptions I am aware of in the counseling field, certifications that are reflective of many hours of advanced training, ongoing supervision, and sustained supervised practice. The three-hour online training certification isn't worth the paper it's printed on. The training might be good, but the certificate doesn't mean much.
The last part of your video about a mature LMHC developing over time has me thinking about law enforcement. I think this could/should apply to police officers. I think the law enforcement community receives a bad wrap and rightfully so. I don't think all law enforcement officers are bad but I also don't think it is "only a few bad apples." I think law enforcement in general has a primary culture of toxic masculinity, aggression, and narcissism. I think all law enforcement officers should attend the police academy for a minimum of two years. Half of the academy could be dedicated to training for the harsher aspects of police work (e.g. violent gang encounters, car chases, etc.) and the other half of academy training could be dedicated to social work skills for use in police matters related to helping a mentally ill unhoused person, school truancy, missing people, etc. If something does not change with law enforcement current way of operating, its bad reputation and inability to win over the trust of the communities that need it most will continue to degrade.
Very important topic to cover. The whole time I was wondering where life coaches be at anyway ? Like where do u find one ? Lol google and social media ? The most unprofessional platforms, not even in person or through referrals right ? On the other side of the elephant yes there should be an in between person that stays between clinical counseling and life skills coach, because sometimes a person does not necessarily need a diagnosis but a life coach or a friend. But maybe that’s what our family, siblings and friends roles are already and life coaches take that opportunity away. At the same time, there are people w no one, no family, no friend to talk to, and I wish there would be more regulations in this department of life coaching which the name itself sounds like a cult. AND even when a person thinks they have no one, they should know that’s not the case and seek clinical counseling immediately since it is a mental health issue. Life coaching could be helpful for someone who is stagnant, stuck and or could be afraid of going to a professional counselor or medical doctor, however, I think this is our families job to protect and take care of one another. I know I was blessed to have my sister be like my “life coach” when she nailed it hard on me and for this I am forever grateful. Thank you sis, I love you.
Life coaching is the Walmart of talk therapy. Be very careful what you share with these people. I got burned by a popular TH-cam life coach. Spent months and months talking to them and sharing my feelings and pretty much entire life story. This person turned out to be super weird and left me an angry voicemail when I missed an appointment. Literally told me to "go fuck myself" and said they are sick of my "Feeling sorry for myself bullshit". Don't mistake a clown for a professional. These people can be very dangerous to your mental health and more.
Depending on intentions. Power of intention can be applied by all people. People in the most so called qualified stations can and will direct interpretations in the way that best suite them. That is because, just like Lego Blocks, things can be built around. A Life Coach or a Counselor, or what Not. Are people that have lived a life of experiences. Rather Formal, or informal. That will take the time to talk with you and give their best input. Only You are the best judge of what you need to do in life. Science always changes. People need to learn to own themselves.
Coaches instruct and train, counselors advise . One sees a personal trainer or coach for fitness .... one seeks counsel from an attorney ... isn’t this a duh kind of thing? The truth is that we seek counsel and training unofficially from all sorts of personal and professional connections throughout our lives ... dr.grande has a great point in discussing the lack of necessary formal training and licensure needed to professionally life coach ... these professional coaches are setting forth a personally believed best way to successfully live a fulfilling life ... it could t be less scientific and more biased ... I speculate that most people know this going in, though.
I feel like life coaches can be a positive and negative. If a person is trained and have the skills and knowledge to successfully help others I think that a life coach could be very beneficial. A lot of people shy away from counselors or therapist because of the name and feeling like they are diagnosing them or the stigmas but life coach makes it seem more informal.
I never really put much stock into the concept of "life coaching"... and for good reason. I appreciate that Dr. Grande mentioned the financial aspect and individuals paying hundreds of dollars for unregulated, unspecified, "services" to an individual with little to no training. I completely agree that the process, training, and education to be a counselor/work in the human services is transformative in that it changes who you are and how you relate to others which would be hard - if not impossible to try and relay in the life coaching process.
Prior to this video, I had little knowledge regarding life coaching. However, I agree the process one must undergo to work within the human services profession is imperative in assisting one in developing their skills so they are competent individuals.
You are right using the word 'murky'. And I guess it is what you want it to be, be it good or not so good. Excellent description of what is out there. Thankyou Dr.
Thank you for another great video! You made some very interesting points. Maturity was the one that stood out to me the most because it is so true! Anyone can go in to receive their life coaching certificate and come out hours or months later and be very immature, incompetent, unskilled, and unknowledgeable. But the time it takes to become a counselor naturally matures a person. Veggie Queen makes a very valid point from her perspective and experience with a life coach though, too. She may have just gotten lucky though or spent a boatload of money. Speaking of, $100-1000 an hour is outrageous! Wow. Great info, thanks so much!
When I was married we worked with a life coach and I’m not going into the whole story but the results were devastating. I went to try to form a lawsuit but I couldn’t because they weren’t licensed. If somebody is not licensed they have nothing to lose and there’s nothing really you can do to them. That’s a real problem as far as responsibility and liability. I’m certain they’re a good people out there doing something nice but it’s still irresponsible. I have a friend who’s the psychiatrist that was working as a life coach and I respect that because he’s a trained professional.Ironically he could not give psychiatric advice because he wasn’t working as a doctor under that designated profession. Anyway I say no to it.
I know a few people that identify themselves as life coaches and can see where the differences lie in these two professions. I found the comment of some of these quick messages that you discussed as developing narcissism. That gave me something to think about Dr. Grande. I found this to be an interesting video. Thank you
Half these guys don’t even live by what they preach I just do it for free cause I love helping people I run landscaping company full time you should never do this for money people who do it for that just copy other life coaches ideas I do it because I been through so much hurt and I got through and helping people through what I went through and watching them get better is so rewarding to me
I think this is an important video for people to see because there is a fine line between life coaching and licensed counseling. I like how Dr. Grande discussed the differences between the two.
Life coaches are often Cluster B disordered individuals who were abused as a child and genuinely want to help others overcome their pain. However, through life coaching they acquire innocent fuel from damaged people who need therapy through their word salad manipulation especially through social media. It should be regulated once you charge for services.
I notice that too. maybe they focus on helping others because they don't want to look at themselves and they get adoration and supply from their clients.
i've been looking into coaching because they seem more willing to disagree with you, tell you what you're doing is wrong and how to change it. the industry is ripe for scammers, but therapy has just been wildly ineffective, if i were a narcissist my experiences in therapy would have only made me worse because all they do is agree! how is it useful if they can't tell the client that what they're doing is fucked up? sure, i already knew, i knew before i even started, but the therapists' implicit agreement makes me think everything must be justified or else they'd SAY SOMETHING....right?
I agree with all your points. I believe life-coaching is treated on the same level as fitness-coaching with little pressure for regulation because bad coaching doesn't generally cause unacceptable widespread harm. At the very least they get to interact with someone, pay for their service and gain a memory of this experience on their life's journey. In the majority of negative experiences they can report them to trading standards or in more serious cases the legal system.
After watching licensed professionals in my state throw a temper tantrum about it in order to demonize 'coaches' (lead by a licensed therapist legislator of state congress), the controversy is pure politics. In my state, licensed therapists got upset because 'coaches' called themselves 'counselors' and successfully competed with them. Not all personal problems come from poor emotional health. In actuality, a 'coach' is a cognitive counselor and does not give mental health diagnosis. Improved performance is the measure of success rather than improved emotional experience. Any improved emotional health gained by coaching is a side affect of correctly perceiving a situation and learning how to deal with it. I recognize that there is overlap, but the focus of coaching is appropriate 'thinking' where the focus of counseling is appropriate 'emotions.' Clients might seek coaching first, before assuming there is something wrong with them requiring them to go on record with therapy. A coach should know what the difference is and should advise therapy when warranted.
"Rent a friend" is probably a good description. Some scoff at renting a friend, but many who want to make a change don't have family or friends or mentors at work to talk to. That being said, it also seems to be a field ripe with charlatans. If you're in the market for a life coach, you need to be doubly inquisitive and doubly skeptical.
I am an educated professional. Hired 2 coaches on separate occasions. One had a professional degree!! Both lacked integrity and were only accountable to the money and not me as an individual. It was a huge disappointment. "Renting a friend" is an accurate description. The friendship only lasts as long as you pay!
Sorry to hear that, like any other business or industry, perhaps you have been unlucky with the non competent ones.
I felt that way about counselors too. My longest relationship with a counselor was 15 years, and even with his PHD he was a sham and high on the Narcissism spectrum. Some counselors are worth it, and some coaches are too.
@@lauriebrown468, fifteen years is quite a lengthy period of time!
It sounds like your education didn’t teach you to not fall for scams or believe Charlatans which isn’t very professional in my opinion.
The fact you 'hired' two life coaches tells me you are just a gullible person. Your degree has nothing to do with being gullible.
I know a whole lot of losers who don't have their own life or finances together calling themselves "life coaches". It's kinda scary.
A lot of doctors who don’t neither. You can be anyone and not have your life or finances together including billionaires. Life Coaching is much more about helping people overcome their limited thinking and align themselves with their core values.
Ditto! 😉
It's very worrying the, 'I can coach X, because I myself have X and I understand' therefore no training required. Or self awareness for that matter.
@Star Dragon Socrates is a life coach, says who? You?
I've seen that, too!
Whats stopping an actual narcissist from calling themselves a life coach? Its a perfect job for them...
Some if not most of them I believe are. Otherwise how can you be so over-confident, at least on the surface, as of to take responsibility for sb's life.
Have a look at dr grande's post about mental health professionals who have mental health issues. He states that a huge number have narcissist tendencies and these are trained professionals. I think that you need to check a lot of things, qualifications, recommendations and how you feel about your counsellor yourself. Even if there's no issues with the counsellor, you just may not gel. It's about yourself, making choices, being proactive in your wellbeing and who you're comfortable with.
Exactly…. It attracts a certain type of individual.
But it's a good career choice for someone who is an INFJ personality.
nothing is stopping them.
I dealt with a life coach that was a complete narcissist. He thought he had all the answers and was never wrong. As long as everyone agreed with him he was nice. As soon as you saw through his con and pointed out anything he would turn on you and turn others against you. And by you I mean me. He was a false preacher that believed in Prosperity Gospel and Law of Attraction. For a pastor, these things are incompatible. So glad to be out of his control. Beware of life coaches that think they have all the answers, for nobody can know everything.
I believe in the law of attraction and practice every day but I can tell you after trying to connect with others, 99% don't understand how it works. They think- oh If I just sit here and envision the BMW, it'll appear in my driveway magically. That's not how it works. The law of attraction does 2 things: First of all it helps you focus only on the good things in your life so that the bad stuff isn't a big deal. For example, when I had a car accident, I wasn't mad at all. I focused on the positives- that nobody was hurt- and it wasn't a stressful situation at all, and I was able to happily go about my life, rather than dwelling on the inconvenience and trauma of it. Second- it gives you motivation to keep going and keep working to be able to get the BMW in your driveway. I really wanted to be self employed and debt free. So I lived my life in abundance. I had the attitude that I was debt free. I enjoyed simple luxuries- I pretended that basic things were luxurious. And I am now debt free. But it takes work, not wishing and magic. Pretending I was living in luxury gave me the motivation every day to get up and triple my sales and my income. So while I pretended I was super rich for drinking coffee and eating bagels, I was paying off my bills. How did I make coffee feel luxurious? No, I did not buy $4 Starbucks every day. All I did was set the timer on my coffee pot so that it was ready for me when I woke up. It made me feel like it was being served to me. So very simple things can put you in the right mindset to achieve those bigger goals. And I'm rambling because it's covid and I never talk to anyone and all my friends are cats. :)
You are aware that there's a horde of terrible 'trained' therapists that are terrible?
You have to understand it's not an A or B scenario.
Beware any pastor or preacher that thinks they are in control of your relationship with God
Been there! Good advice, "beware of the coaches that claim to have all the answers"
@@gratefulila9980 yes good point
I am a coach, I have a psyche degree and I am a trained counsellor. But I have chosen to be a coach. If I have a client with mental health issues, I stand aside and advise my client to approach their GP or I will refer the client to mental health services myself. I find it immoral and unethical to work with a vulnerable person who is in desperate need of a mental health professional.
Ann P Tully : Exactly. There is a legitimate place for well educated life coaches. Many of us hold other degrees in helping professions. There are some incredibly ignorant responses to Grande's original post. I decided to stop frustrating myself after reading a few.
Anyway, yes, refer to mental health those who need a doctor. I agree. And let intelligent adults choose practirioners who produce RESULTS. Marriage counseling has failed miserably.
So if you are trained and this field why aren't you utilizing it and practicing under the training? Why a coach?
What do you coach? Football, basketball, or soccer?
@@raymorrow1491 If I may draw an analogy, why might someone work as a sports coach or personal trainer if they had an MD? Although the more regulated work requiring the higher degree of education and license may be more respected and well-paid, it may not be the preference of the individual to do that sort of work, to work with that particular population, to work for an institution, and/or to comply with the ongoing requirements of the more highly regulated industry
@Inge Fossen what is that?
My experience of life coaches is that they encourage you to make bold decisions by building up your sense of invincibility. The actions are all entirely at your own risk, with absolutely no risk to themselves either financially or emotionally. I do believe in being in harmony with the Universe, but I wouldn't pay someone to tell me to jump off a cliff in order to see how harmonious we are.
Thank you for this spot on observation.
The promises that life coaches make are so amazing. The first thing they learn; there's a sucker born every minute.
A sucker born every day and two to take him .
I had 2 free sessions with a life coach through my work and it was a positive experience as it was tailored to professionalism & growing in my career. But this video did talk about distinctions that I wasn’t aware of!
It's extremely scary when a "life coach" goes around claiming that their "client " tells them that they saved their life in order to promote themselves. Sounds grandiose, self serving, controlling, manipulative and very narcissistic! Look how many are floating around You Tube looking for vulnerable people and donations. It's really disturbing in my book.
omg
There are different interpretations that people may use to express how someone can save/impact their life.
Absolutely. I know of one that is a wolf in sheps clothing
Swindling and PIMPING!!!
If feeds a person’s ego for others to look up to them and listen to what they have to say. So for those with self-esteem issues (like my cousin), it feeds her need for validation and to feel important.
My sister in law was a life coach for awhile. She had been unable to get a real job because she is a completely self absorbed little narcissist, so life coaching was a perfect fit. Now she’s a financial advisor😂
Either we are related or there are more of them 😆
😂😂
God it’s like a plague at the moment these life coaches, i just watch from a distance with my popcorn as to how stupid humans are buying into this scam. It does annoy me the coaches actually making good money though
Life coaching is a perfect fit for a narcissistic person who wants to prey on the vulnerable.
😅
Big scam in my opinion. The coaches I've met were intellectually underwhelming. I think those who want tp help people can study psychology, social work or even yoga. But something completely unregulated, no. And evenen someone with a degree may suck at the job.
A lot of coaches I have met cannot prove excellence in anything they coach. They fall short in all aspects of their coaching. So I just don't understand, how can you coach if you aren't a living proof of what you are coaching? I don't mind getting coached by a real estate Billionaire of how to make real estate deals, or by a doctor of how to take care of my body. Even that, some will not be accurate, but at least the chances are better if they have mastered something!
@@Dareen.K Right? They'll "help you build a successful business / build your dream life", when they're broke and struggling themselves / their life is a dumpster fire. Make it make sense!
This video is gold! It’s a pleasure seeing your humor come through. I’m literally laughing out loud. I’m studying art therapy & my dearest friend is a licensed clinical psychologist. We have had this conversation countless times. I really enjoyed listening to your perspective on this topic. Keep up the good work!
Thank you so much for those kind words!
I am a licensed social worker and have a life coach. She went through a long term certification, I think 2 years. She is very helpful with accountability and goal setting. It’s not therapy but it’s helpful. She is very transparent as to her role... I think we all need to be careful who we go to for whatever it may be.
Let's bump this comment to the top! Life coaches are valuable. If properly trained, they can be a reflection of our subconscious beliefs that we don't normally have access to. Plus, many coaches are trained in techniques such as NLP, hypnotherapy, EFT, etc. which are all extremely helpful for our wellbeing.
Certification from where?
"Renting a friend" did make me laugh because I was anticipating that response to come out at some point in the video due to the route it was moving towards. I have heard of life coaching, but I never would have compared it to counseling in the sense that if I need professional help that I'd go to a life coach. I can see where a life coach would be beneficial for some, but if someone is truly struggling with mental illness, it is best to seek a counselor. Thank you for the video!
It's renting a "friend".
in theory a life coach can be good (if it's not about mental health) in practice there's a lot of guru's and wowo or strait up predators/scammers
Tbf I've found therapists to be the same :(
Gurus are real, but they don’t become life coaches, and they generally won’t tell you they’re a guru.
There is a real distinction between coaching and counseling:
A counselor works with the unhealthy part of a person and the coach works with the healthy part of the person, whenever I interview a new potential client, I asked them after they explained what they are trying to cope with, is this preventing you from functioning on a daily basis? If they say say, mostly yes, then I refer them to seek counseling, if they reply with, no, I can function, just wished that there was a better way to move forward, then have dive deeper into what kind of coaching they would benefit from.
To say that executive coaching is the same as business coaching or life coaching is wrong on all levels.
The fact that it's an unregulated sector gives it flexibility, and freedom of discovery.
Often clients have commented on how much farther and deeper I was able to bring them to find their own solutions than any counseling that they took before.
Many say that counseling actually prevented them to move forward, as they were tired of rehashing the same old each year.
Regulatory body is important, however, it has to be an integrated system.
Counseling, therapy & coaching & workshops have to work together with the client.
Can't keep buying the client it's weekly fish, give him a rod to borrow, teach him or her to fish, clean it, cook it and experience living life again.
In the last I was part of the pilot project of dual diagnosis as the life coach, nowadays its known as Concurrent Disorders.
I have supported inmates to integrate into their community who were diagnosed with Concurrent Disorders, I have supported people with disabilities and Concurrent Disorders in my home as well as a day program provider.
I have been part of Forensic Psychiatric team in the Forensic Psychiatric Hospital in BC.
Because of my coaching training, I can work with all walks of life, however, just like a counselor, one must choose their niches and master them and keep learning, just because I know how to coach, doesn't mean I can stop learning how to coach better
You know the life coach is bogus when they give advice. The whole point is to pull the inner resources out and allow them to work techniques and processes in order to make more efficient choices in their lives.
But if there is no real definition of life coaching, how can you or anybody else say what the "whole point" is? You're really just giving an opinion.
You clearly don't understand coaching if you think giving advice is a bad thing.
The majority of modern therapy is sadly majorly flawed and of little use.
@@melymichu6731 As a therapist, I have to disagree. Therapists do two things: they bring out traumatic events for healing, and they teach new, healthier coping skills. The latter does involve “giving advice.” We may be cautious in how we present the advice (e.g. what if you tried this instead of that), but rest assured, it’s still advice.
@@finngrant234 Agree. If you're going to pay someone to be smarter and wiser than you, they should offer advice.
@@Longtack55 If the client had the "answers/solutions", they would not be paying someone upwards of $100, to go there. Most people only go to someone else, when they cannot solve their own problem.
I really wish there was some outside sociological research or studies on the industry so that evaluations on Life Coaching (positive, negative, and nuanced) would be less anecdotal than they are currently.
Interesting idea! I’d love to see a Ph. D. thesis on the issue. Great idea, in fact.
We are talking about an industry that is completely self certified, there are no regulating bodies establishing standards and practices or accountability. It's like New Age practitioners operating with licenses from various schools
Unlocking your inner narcissist! Spot-on Dr! 👍
I’m applying to grad school for counseling and you took the words right out of my mouth. Excellent video with well put information. Keep up the videos, they are very informative and explanatory.
Thank you so much!
I've used both. I found my life coach to be extremely helpful. I had basically no expectations, but they really helped me reach my goals. Part of what I like about a life coach is that they're not afraid to get into helping you make life decisions, something that a counselor won't do. I've also been to therapy and that's very helpful but in a totally different way.
If they’re really making decisions for you, you’re simply codependent upon them. As a vulnerable teenager I befriended a guy online that was a life coach, and all he did was live vicariously through me. At the time everything felt right, but I was simply taking too much risk and ignoring intuition. I let him possess me in a way, but I enjoyed the ride. I’m happy that you’ve found someone who helps you but don’t ever be afraid to question what they stand for. Know yourself and what you stand for or someone’s traumatized inner child may decide who you are for you.
@@dancegod1691 "ignoring intuition". The way you phrased this was very helpful to me! When I read that, I realized that this has been a huge part of my problem for a very long time. In wanting to give people the "benefit of the doubt" like I've been taught my whole life, I've often ignored my own intuition, which was trying to help me avoid bad situations, relationships, and a lot of pain. Thanks for commenting and sharing your views. This was helpful to me.
THAT is scary, because I bet you they aren't better than you in what they are coaching. You just needed a listening ear, but then you got someone that thinks they have the power to make life decisions for you. What an ego stroke for them!
I see many people are finding this alarming. I found it to be quite helpful. I used a life coach for a few weeks to help me stay motivated, and I landed my dream job, and then that was it, job done.
The problem wiith you saying your life coach helped you reach your goals is that its anecdotal, so even if your opinion of your life coach was accurate (another issue in itself since humans lie to themselves frequently) its probably not typical or valuable as an example
"renting a friend that can be supportive" LOL it is SO validating to hear you say all of this. I USED to be friends with someone who is now a life coach. She RIPS people off & me & her ex husband have been wondering if she is a narcissist & definitely feel like she is. But she believes her own shit! Exactly how she can be unscrupulous. She thinks she is awesome at life but she lies and she lost a best friend and her husband, which apparently she wanted to anyhow. She sucked. Thanks for doing this.
Many life coaches without degrees
charge a fortune without insurance
coverage availability
Laura Stokes and that’s how they make their money also because they are unregulated
is this a haiku?
@@cletusawreetus-awrightus2799 Quality comedy. :)
@@thecarlitosshow7687
There’s inadequacies the other way too. And because of insurance companies, a practitioner can charge higher rates than they’d be able to otherwise.
🤣
This video touches on some great points about the difference between life coaching and counseling. I wondered myself especially with the influx of tv shows and programs for a fee. Dr. Grande touched on what I feel to be the most significant point which is regulation. Without the techniques and practices being regulated someone could slap the label on anything and call it “help”. Counseling being a profession that requires school and training makes the two completely different.
Couldn’t agree more. Boundaries and clarity are a real issue. I wonder if life coaches are able to reflect upon their own process and recognise when they are hooked into someone’s material when it mirrors their own.
"Harness the power of the universe. Well, that's a lot of energy. What would you do with all that energy?"
Omg, that delivery! XD
Dr Grande is so unintentionally hilarious sometimes. So f***ing cute! 😍
He’s got a very dry sense of humor. His straight faced delivery IS hilarious.
I was once inspired by a life coach who motivated me to be positive with everyone. With that positive attitude I approached a malignant narcissist, and then I managed to survive. Trust me, it was a bad idea!!! And now I'm negative with everyone!!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I went to a life coach for my anxiety and depression. Felt better in five sessions and felt almost healed in ten. I got tired of the traditional talk therapy. After twenty sessions of venting and "how does that make you feel?" I got annoyed and knew I needed something different.
The challenge with mental health professionals is that, since they are human, they each have a different style. I have had 3 or 4 that I only had 2 or 3 sessions with and then switched to someone else. It is hard when your counselor retires or moves and then you have to look for someone new. All that just to say, they're not all the same.
Great topic and insight. Life coaching seems to be the show business off-shoot of mental health. That aspect perhaps couldn't stop you from using dry humour in your usually austere delivery. Really interesting Dr Grande
Thank you!
Dr. Grande, I have enjoyed your videos. You have a nice style that appears very grounded in science and research, which in my opinion a professional should always be. Your analysis of life coaching was excellent. Here is the issue I see with life coaches... they invariably seem at one time or another to cross the line over to "therapy or counseling" and into the realm of professional counselors or psychologists without that training or licensure. This in my opinion can be dangerous. Now, that is not to say that some of the things life coaches say or suggest does not necessarily parallel what we do as professional doctors, or even help people as you point out, however, being unregulated there seems a greater potential for harm. I especially like your take on developmental maturity. Our licensing boards, at least in my opinion, and i am being general here, need to take a stronger look at regulation simply because given the type and minimal number of hours needed to be a coach, there is always the danger of venturing into uncharted or untrained professional waters, if you take my meaning. Again, thank you for your videos, please keep doing them. My deepest respects sir.
It can be very true. However, there can be licensed or educated professionals who act unscrupulously and ineffectively as well. While they might be in possession of a license or within the boundaries of regulations, they can still act inappropriately, scam people, and the like.
Yesss! It’s down right dangerous. There is a life coach on TH-cam that specializes in adult children who grew up being narcissistically abused. She runs a 12 week program. She asks you to unlock your childhood trauma, along with another 100 to 200 members, and once you have achieved this you are pretty much screwed, open wounds and no one to help you deal with the infection of pain it creates. She keeps repeating if people don’t like what you say then it’s their problem, not yours, in this way she creates really self absorbed members who feel entitled to say what they want without taking accountability for their hurtful words.
It really screwed with my head. I so wanted to belong that I went along with it all and was swept away by the cult like hype of this lady (who has threatened to sue members who speak out about her) I’ve reviewed her on google maps wand so have a few other brave ex members but she is incredibly narcissistic and denies and deflects. This year one of her members set themselves on fire and died, this has to stop!
She charges $1000 to do her 12 week, then another $$$$ for master class then $$$ for her warrior membership sight per month, then $$$ cruises and she doesn’t stop. She gloats of her fabulous life and beautiful new kitchen on video while some of her members are not sure where their next meal will come from, or where their next beating will hit. She claims to teach you how to manifest these things like she has. How do we stop this? It’s criminal for sure.
In your opinion, which person on TH-cam that specialises on adult survivors of childhood narcissistic abuse should we be staying away from?
Yes I'd like to know who this is please
In my opinion, Lisa A Romano, is doing more damage then good.
@@irispect6565 thank you for your opinion, in my opinion you opinion is were informative and my opinions have evolved and changed due your opinion. Thanks
@@irispect6565 I have to disagree. I've watched many TH-cam videos from different people covering Narcissism, and I've found that Romano knows her stuff. She has definitely been abused and knows the behaviors and patterns of people with Narcissism higher on the spectrum. Many do not, and actually cause more damage. That being said, there are many licensed professionals that cause more damage because they themselves are not versed in the behavior patterns of Narcissism, nor are they even aware of the various types. When in school to become a psychologist, the only information on cluster B personality disorders comes from the criteria of the DSM-5, which is in dire need of being updated. It only describes the garden variety Narcissist, and only one type. To learn of the more nefarious types, the psychologist in school needs to be going for criminal psychology. That's why the majority of licensed psychologists are useless in helping victims and survivors of Narcissistic abuse.
So, there is absolutely nothing wrong with someone calling themselves a coach that specializes in helping from Narcissistic abuse. And there's no reason a coach with experience, such as Romano has, can't be effective in that realm. I get that you feel like she rips people off and charges too much money , and that she's getting wealthy doing so. That also doesn't make her a charlatan. The gloating, or what appears to be Narcissistic when she shows off her new kitchen, etc, is something that many survivors do when we have schadenfreude towards our abusers ( Also natural) and we want them to see we are having a great life. Its actually quite normal, as having a great life post Narcissist is the best revenge. As a survior myself, I know what kind of brain fog you have to get through to be able to ascertain what happened to you and then be able to articulate in such a way that it makes sense. It's not easy. It's alot of work to get there emotionally. She's obviously done the work. And she SHOULD charge for her more personalized services. I give her credit that she has taken what was the darkness in her life ( abuse and abusive people ) and turned it into a way to sustain her life and to become successful with it. And really, why shound she spend years and be in financial debt for who know how long from laying tuition to a college where she wont even get the necessary curriculum to treat survivors of Narcissistic abuse anyway? Really, only those that have experienced the abuse can understand it, so getting a degree in this case is fruitless. Anyway, all of us surviors should be so lucky to make a career out of what our abuserstried to destroy us with. So, in my opinion, she is one of the most informed non psychologists on TH-cam that definitely knows what she is talking about and I listen to her, along with Dr. Ramani.
Thank you for this video. If I scroll by another video on facebook by a self proclaimed "life coach" that tells us that we'll all die of cancer if we don't forgive the perpetrators of our past trauma, my eyes might finally roll so hard that they pop out. They never even tell us HOW to forgive, just that we need to. And that if we don't, we're toxic people. But if we pay $200 for a 1 hour webcam session with them, they'll tell us the secret to forgiveness. $200 is 3 times the amount I pay my actual licensed therapist to spend an hour with me helping to actually process my trauma. I've seen a pattern of "life coaches" regurgitating rhetoric that has no basis in actual psychology or psychiatric research. I'm done with hearing "life coaches" claim that the natural emotion of anger as a reaction to a traumatic event is something the suffering individual should feel guilty about. I'm done with victim blaming phrases like "If you can't love yourself, you can't love anyone else. And if you can't love others, they can't truly love you". I'm done with victim blaming ideologies like "You've been abused because you allowed yourself to be abused". As if it's not a deeply more insidious issue rooted in childhood trauma. I'm astounded that "life coaching" still remains unregulated. I'm sure it helps some, but the majority of what i've observed has been their favorite word to use: toxic. I was reading a book recently that said something that made me think of exactly how dangerous "life coaches" can be: This is a quote from The Narcissistic Family: Diagnosis and Treatment by Stephanie Donaldson-Pressman and Robert Pressman, both clinical psychologists. "In our experience, the pressure to forgive the perpetrator often gets in the way of genuine recovery. As it can act to shut off the patient's neccessary expression of anger and self validation of feelings." In other words, focus more on your healing first. Forgiveness may come naturally after that, or it might not. They do not feel as though forgiveness is necessary for the healing process. But yet, it is so common among "life coaches" that that's the first thing they want you to do. They want you to get to the top of the mountain before climbing it, and for you to pay them $200+ an hour for it. Can you imagine standing in front of a mountain, being told not to climb it, but the person standing next to you saying "you can do it!" takes $200 for every hour passed that you haven't reached the top of the mountain yet?
Geekella If you truly listen to what they say, they don’t say anything. I once asked, “but what does that mean?” And I got a narcissistic stare that creeped me out.
I agree. I used to be in a number of facebook support groups for mental health disorders, but they became overwhelmed by life coaches trying to drum up business by exploiting people who were obviously in a vulnerable state. The fact that these coaches go to groups specifically for mental disorders shows that they have no moral compass or ethical standards. They are not qualified mental health professionals and offered advice such as "get outside in nature and exercise" or "change your diet, change your mental health" as cures for depression/anxiety. they are bottom dwelling scum looking to profit off of people's trauma.
Geekella I see a psychiatrist regularly. He’s really funny( not that this is a requirement of a good therapist!) and when I express my anger about how I was treated/past events etc he really encourages me. I get very frustrated with this idea of forgiveness . My diet fil was a total bastard. He’s dead now and I still hate that fucker. There has never been the merest hint that I should be forgiving him and that’s just how I like it
@@griffox actually that's very correct advice, BUT I would highly doubt ever enough. ;-) (and I'm saying this as a trained counsellor who has also been a part of a program that focus on helping people with depression and anxiety specifically.)
I think that's another danger with some life coaches; they mix truth with error and then people lose faith in the truth because it doesn't work!
@@griffox Swindlers and pimpers!!!!
I’ve known two people who became life coaches. Two people I kept at arms length as they are dangerously fucked up individuals. Life coaches fit perfectly in the dietitian/nutritionalist confusion. I am relieved to see in the comments that a lot of people have sussed it out as mainly a scam. This doesn’t take away the fact that many do it with good intentions but the risks are too high for some people.
“Renting a friend who can support you” hah you mad my day Dr. Grande:)
Yep same here. I think coaches tell you what you want to hear and a therapist or psychologist or psychiatrist may not.
Expensive rent. Life coaches charge ridiculous money
Really agree with your opinion. The entry level really is too low. Though I think harnessing is not about power over others just power over your mind and yourself. A honest life coach would not take a client if they have to deal with mental illness if they are not educated treating it. A good life coach should focus on encouraging clients to focus on their dreams that connect with their soul and help them get closer to it with real life action plans. But as you mentioned, it’s vulnerable to scam. Therefore a potential client should not believe in high promise but in their own feelings about the coach. :)
Mario Motivation Well said, thank you!! I’m teeter tottering between life coaching and a therapist
Last year, my abnormal psych instructor told us many a story of counselors who lost their licenses and then went on to become a life coaches.
why did they lose their licenses?
Inappropriate relationship with their clientele
Is that Jordan Peterson?
toasted kiwi no, but it would be funny if it was. That guy is no friend of mine!
Michael Smallwood I’ve read a lot of Carl Jung, and I think Peterson exploitsJung’s ideas and bends then to shape Peterson’s schist worldview. I’ve meaning to watch Dr. Todd’s video. Now there is a scholar who is making a difference!
Great video! Thanks Dr. Grande. It's the first video in which you show you're also having a great sense of humour.
"Learning how to unharness my inner narcissist" for 1000 USA dollars an hour by someone who isn't a licensed counselor and did a 3 hour Life Couching training?
No, thank you very much 😂😂😂
I rather prefer to listen for free to the videos of Dr. Grande in which we learn a lot we can use in our personal battles with mental health issues and in discovering the 'harness narcissists" we unfortunately have to deal with nowadays in this society so often.
A Happy Christmas to everyone who is a big fan of this TH-cam channel 🎅🌲☃
Thank you so much! Merry Christmas!
oh my gosh this is so great, especially about the ambiguous buzz words. please please do a video on self help books! the most popular ones say that “the universe will provide all your needs” and weird stuff like that that just confuses people and make them feel like failures for not being able to live up to all the promises those books make. causing more problems that didn’t previously exist for the reader. so damaging but the industry keeps growing and growing and unqualified people keep making best seller lists and misleading people.
Man, i love this guy's rhetoric and perspective! Completely awesome! It helps me "harness" the power of using facts :)))
It’s regulated by ICF. in order to get accredited you have to get an ICF accreditation (ACC, PCC, MCC).
AND REQUIRES EXACTLY WHAT .
That's a voluntary registration, which is not the same as regulation.
ICF is a professional collective not a regulating body with any official medical or mental health oversight
I think life coaching may be helpful for people who have immediate problems they want to solve or goals they want to set and they need that extra push or guidance from someone who can help them navigate through that process. Whereas I view the counseling process as dealing with deeper issues and gaining coping mechanisms. I also think as counselors we have to be careful in not being condescending towards other practices outside of our own so that we don't shame others or even potential clients they may want to participate in counseling and life coaching.
I think I would tend to agree with you on this point Elysha. There definitely is a place for both specializations. THe only concern is the chance of misrepresentation as to what that may entail for the client who assumes this is the same thing as counseling.
I don't think life coaching is a scam, I believe in some ways it can be helpful. It can be used to motivate people or assist them in their careers perhaps. It's not on the same level or scale as professional counseling as this takes years of education and training. For me the problem is when life coaches cross the line into counseling without proper credentialing. They could do a lot of harm to an individual that needs specialized care. I've never heard of it said like "renting a friend" but it does now fit that description! Thanks for the video.
Thank you for pointing out that the benefits associated with life coaching should not be discounted. Full disclosure of the service descriptions both what life coaching is and what it is not would be ideal.
🤗🤗🤗 there's so much confusion and murky grounds surrounding many professions, gullible me can easily get sucked in,thanks for clearing up.
You are quite welcome!
This video was a great way to look at life coaching versus the mental health profession and how to discern between the two. I appreciated Dr. Grande's disclosure of his bias toward counseling. His argument was quite compelling. I enjoyed the poking of fun regarding summoning the inner narcissist and renting a friend. However, he did point out the fact that training for life coaching can be as simple as a 3-hour seminar whereas counseling requires years of education, testing, and licensure. He also pointed out that some life coaches have the tendency to spill over into the field of counseling with no real knowledge of how to refer or deliver treatment. I do believe that life coaching can come in the form of motivational speaking but it is important to know where and what in which to invest time, money, and energy.
I see a lot of bias in this video. I also see lack of understanding how the coaching is working and what it really is. You are mixing motivational speakers or some really 'interesting' specialists after three hours of training with real, solid coaching practice . My advice would be to understand first thing which you are going to speak about instead of talking about it from one particular point of view. I belive that this relation between coaching and therapy is a spectrum and in my mind it boils down to the question - what is health? Is it only lack of illness as therapist are looking at this or it's something more? There is whole part of psychology full of people who are talking about potential of human being like carl Rogers, Abraham Maslow, Alfred Adler from whom coaching practice is taking a lot from. Coaching has theoretical support in many areas of psychology, not only psychology but also neurobiology. To understand it better there is a great book - 'Coaching with the Brain in Mind: Foundations for Practice' I highly reccommend it to really go deep in this topic instead of just gloss over it.
Hey Doc. I like the video. I think you did touch on some key points. I think there is some bias in your statement (understandably) but in any case I feel it is all based on what a person needs. There are people out there that do not need therapy as they are not going through any trauma or diagnosed for PTSD or drug or alcoholic abuse. At this point life coaches can be beneficial to help people who simply want to overcome obstacles and limiting beliefs in order to have a better overall quality of life. It’s not a “ rent a friend” service. If that were the case, every friend I’ve had would still be in my life which ain’t the case. And yes there are plenty of negative influences in people’s lives. How do I know? Being a trainer and former bouncer.
Great topic!!! theres alot of people out there that im sure have no idea what their doing and act like they do and scam and can also mentally hurt other vulnerable people.
Thank you so much one more time, Dr Grande. I'd been thinking about that topic for some time. In the end, I agree with you 100% and I feel validated after watching one more of your incredibly helpful videos.
I'm pretty much in the end of my recovery from narcissist abuse, I suppose, and like some people I would like to help other targets. I thought about taking a coaching course but gave up for the reasons you mentioned: I came to notice it might be full of opportunistic narcissists, which I can live without lol. After months of continuous research, and support from friends and other victims, I'm seriously considering doing that, specially after so many failed attempts to find a qualified professional in the area. The way I see it, with little to no empathy and knowledge, most of them retraumatize the targets in CPTSD. That's simply ridiculous and cruel. However, I know about my limitations,, i know I need to dedicate and study much more psychology and treatments. I really feel like helping, at least informing, people about it, but I'm aware I'm not gonna change the world, of course.
Thank you so very much for all your videos. They're priceless and a lifesaver. I hope you never stop.❣😎🍀
Thank you one more time, Dr Grande.
You are most welcome! Thank you for those kind words!
Bless you Todd. I love your you tube channel, and I think you're a star. But I just feel I need to add that in the UK I know of so, so many truly genuine, heart centred, authentic life coaches who hope to support their clients reach their goals. For non academic lay people, the language of the life coach may be just what the client / person need to try. And whilst many life coaches do charge quite high amounts, which they explain to their clients is an 'investment' towards the future 'growth' of the client, please remember that life coaches themselves normally partake in long term life coaching themselves. There's a potentially huge feel good factor to connecting with the right life coach who maybe doesn't have the academic medical model style graduate qualifications, but have a heart centre personality that many ordinary people need in today's day and age. Most life coaches won't survive in the uk unless they have a credible track record. And for the person / client, paying for a life coach or two or three its surely no different from say spending money on a new outfit, holiday or car....its the client's risk and choice, and if say a life coach can help a person think about how to stop self-sabotaging their life, and walk a more positive, productive, goal directed path, then what harm is that. Yes their will always be narcissistic con artists out their, but certainly in the UK, some highly intelligent, non academic life coaches exist to fill the gaps where their personality skills can be put to good use as a life coach specialising in whatever areas they feel competent enough to life coach in. For me counselling and therapy work (which feels more clinical mental health medical model) is a very different thing from the range of creative methods that life coaches can utilise. Sorry to waffle on. I do absolutely love your you tube channel, and think you are a star - a reasonable guy, beautifully intelligent and scientifically informed x ( but yes, there are a lot of egotistic, narcissistic, know-it-alls out there to be avoided and not manipulated by...and doubtless some may have invented themselves as life coaches, so people beware! ) x
I would agree...it sounds like renting a friend. I would not advise a life coach for anyone with serious issues.
This video kind reminds me of the movie The King’s Speech. Sometimes it requires less convention methods, or someone who thinks outside the AMA box to help others. I would be interested in how much damage is actually done by the use of life coaches as opposed to trained counselors/psychologists/psychiatrists. I would imagine that truly disturbed individuals do not seek the help of life coaches and if they do, I would hope that those life coaches would send them on to the appropriate medical treatment. I have a loved one who was in the care of a licensed counselor and she ended up sending him to a psychiatrist. She knew she was in over her head. I’m sure there are a handful that wouldn’t do so, but I have to believe that most people that choose the field of helping others will and do recognize when a client/patient is in need of help that they are not prepared to provide.
been using Tony Robbins for years and I have noticed a significant increase in the circumference of my head.
NLP
Narcissistic
Life
Principles
Best comment so far
I am not a life coach but as I was listening to your concerns and observations I did appreciate why this would be important to look at,as my first interest in finding out what I was going through came through researching on the internet the different clues that I had and trying to come to an conclusion,This platform has been very helpful because it seemed to me others whom I talked to did not understand what I,
and many many others were going through, I appreciated that finally I have found something that makes sense and match’s up with what I was going through and I think it is a Grownup form of Bullying and the Advice that I heard (not from any one person) is some form of discipline DBT ? may work or at least help ;we needed help, and for this I am thankful.❤️💐🌈🤗🙏🏼
That was one _long_ sentence 🤔
Good stuff! My ex roommate was a "life coach" who is 30+ years old and still parties it up like they are 18, and brought home random girls from the bar on occasion that he said were "high quality", proceeded to date for a couple months then move on, then get back with them randomly. He was also a pathological liar who did it to your face, and someone who if you didn't agree with them you would feel the wrath for days. Finally he tried giving me advice and I just couldn't help but laugh a little bit because it is true, ANYONE can become a "life coach". Even a dishonest, immature spoiled brat with low self-esteem. Interestingly enough, he would copy and immitate me quite often as well and then pretend like it wasn't happening. Yep, he was certainly releasing his inner narcissist on a daily basis. Spot on, Dr. Grande!
This sounds exactly like my ex lmao 😂
Spot on! I see some of these so-called "life coaches" and their lives are in complete turmoil. There needs to be better standards.
Life coaches do have training and certification, it's just there are no laws connected, so theoretically, someone can simply call themselves a "Life Coach" and set up shop. However, it has to be up to the public to make sure to seek out someone with certification and training, until there is some sort of legal requirement for licensure.
I have to agree. Many life coaches have no knowledge of psychology, having no ‘formal ‘ learning. I have been taking a degree in computer science, and after studying AI, I switched to study some psychology modules (I’ve read a lot about psychology and watched many documentaries and listened to many lectures, but, I have come to realise, when one is in control of their own trajectory in learning, much, essential learning, can be missed). and it’s really opened my eyes to the ‘inaccuracies ‘ out there. Inaccuracies that on the surface, make perfect sense, well they did to me. Now I’m starting to question everything. I’ve always been turned off by practices with no scientific value but it goes beyond that... I’m starting to see how nuanced the mind can be, and the ‘other’ explanations for the phenomena observed. Along side my degree, Ive been taking an EQ course and have started to look at NLP and CBT, I can see you have some videos on CBT, I’ll take a look. I’ve always been very attracted to intelligent and educated people with the attitude ‘I know nothing ‘ but it’s possible that.... ( Socrates?) I’m glad people like you are around to add another perspective into the mix Maybe you could cover some raw psychology, such as cognitive bias, implicit biases, conflict, self-esteem, projection, projective identification, attachment, trauma... I’ll think of a load more 😁 to move the conversation over to a more, responsible understanding. ( Responsible as in to take responsibility.) Question everything is my new mantra. Thanks for the videos Dr G 👍🏻😊
Have you thought about course creation? On Udemy, or your own site. Just a thought 😊
Im a homemaker made and design to be with parents, friends and children.its been a hectic day to start for this indepence day in my country , a friend of my suggesting of cooking special meals for today.the food is great and we are happy about it.the voice of the prime minister still can be heard in my ears, the vision are clear and well presented.if looking ahead its the next generation is very important and cant take for granted.everything is done special to help the needs of the old and young people. It is always to hope for the best leaders for the next few years to making the country great again.
I think on the maturation side of things your concerns might be conflating the role of a counselor and a life coach. On the problematic end of things this is certainly true... but only if a life couch is trying to be a counselor.
Hypothetical example: Let's say you have a retiree who spent his life in efficiency and business improvement careers. He has industry certifications like Six Sigma and other trainings that combine with his MBA to constitute more than 8 years of traditional schooling.
In his retirement years, he opens a life coaching business that focuses exclusively on time management and on site physical home/work organisation using internationally-recognized efficiency programs. One could argue that his professional life experience is better suited to providing that specific life skill than going to a therapist and that getting a counselor degree would not help make him a better life-organizer.
I think this kind of cross-discipline coaching where a coach with experience in a very specific life skill specialization (time management, organization, etiquette, personal style, home economics, etc) is probably the best scenario that this industry provides.
You make an excellent point. Maturity can come from multiple places and have different forms.
@@DrGrande I don't think that minimizes the cases covered in your original concern... it just provides for plausable alternate cases that are not so problematic.
Your point is still valid in many cases: there is a definite danger of people confusing their passion for something with expertise. There is no substitute for experience.
Along those lines, a criticism that you could have levied in this video is one of continuing education. In most cases in most places, regulated certification-based service industries require regular ongoing training to remain current and sharp in the profession.
Unregulated services like life coaching do not have this requirement so it is much easier to be "rusty" or "out of the loop" regarding advances when it comes to unregulated fields.
@@DrGrandeGreat content! There are a lot of scam courses out there but i want to become a coach helping ppl who are suffering with stress. i have spent thousands on courses including studying online with a world class therapist who has now crossed over into coaching. I've spent years in training but i don't want to cross over into mental health. Were would you say the line should be for me to recognise the difference between some1 suffering with stress and some1 with mental health problems?
@@lagerandapacketcrisp stress is a mental health problem. I'd be very careful about the way you offer your service and the sorts of advice that you give regarding stress.
Thanks a lot, I am right now doing a life coach course and thought of training others, but thanks to you, I will not do it right now. I have to settle myself first and become something worthy.. I must have right credentials to coach others... Thanks a lot..
I find is strange that you do not differentiate between counselling and coaching. Coaching is education and guidance, positive psychology if you will. Counselling assumes mental health challenges. Completely disparate topics. By the way there are plenty of highly qualified counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists that are extremely poor at their job. Just as there is the potential for an outstanding life coach to have minimal formal qualifications. A piece of paper guarantees nothing.
I am a life coach and I approve this message. Life coaching is coaching, not counseling. There are some coaches out there who have a goal of SALES before results, that is true too. BE SELECTIVE! But there is maturity that comes from living, learning, and applying lessons. And there is the desire to help others avoid the mistakes that you made. I coach people who need and seek help in dating and relationships, I do not attempt to solve mental health issues. I have read a lot, and studied a lot, (and lived A LOT) and I have noticed one common theme: Men who are virgins (monks/spiritualists) or have only been with 1 or 2 partners (some counselors) giving advice on dating and relationships. While "life coaches" may lack certain types of training, these types mentioned above lack real world experience. I learned a long time ago not to take dating advice from people like that. YET i still respect and consume the scientific research, with a grain of salt.
Someone like yourself KNOWS what they are talking about. Yes education and going through all the hard hard work youve been through. I know your not just spewing whatever just to sound good, i really know already you are absolutely credible.
Coaching job is like holding a hand of someone who has decided to become somebody in life, such as profession, or striving a business goals, personal achievement. And, in my opinion, that is absolutely fine. As long as a Coach doesn’t enter the area of profession of a Mental Doctor, psychology or any other specialist of this industry, than it is perfectly fine.
Coach in my opinion, it is a bit like a Priest vs School Teacher.
Both are important for the society, but one holds a degree, the other, not. However, there is space for everyone in this world. I think, they compliment each other. Anyone of them, keep people, out of failures, disappointments, crime and try to fit some people who doesn’t know that they are valuable for them selves and their loved ones. If you have a passion, love and patience, good communication skills, and you are CRB checked by the authorities. You are mentally fit, have no record of crime, than you have clean integrity, you should practice coaching by all means. At the end of the day, it is just a service, and if you are not good at it, people will find out straight away, therefore you will be out of business. But, I do agree of some of the points and concerns, the honourable Dr is talking about
I have heard of Life Coaching before but never thought that people would use a Life Coach rather than a counselor. I think that the biggest concern, as Dr. Grande pointed out, would be someone going to see a Life Coach who has not had any training when they really need to see a counselor. If someone is really in distress and the Life Coach has no formal training, the harm that could come to the individual could be detrimental.
Jackie De Leonardis-Thompson I agree that there is a high potential for harm to be done but I don’t think people are seeking out life coaches to deal with every mental distress. I see people using life coaches more as hired friends or cheerleaders - someone who is going to agree with you and help you achieve a goal regardless of its healthy or not. I agree there is a chance of people taking advantage of vulnerable people because of the lack of regulation and training. But I really only ever here if the ‘elite’ or executives using this route of care
Watching videos like your channel and other channels have really helped me sort out lots of issues in my life. I appreciate all you do Dr. G! Hope you have a great holiday!
Thank you so much, I hope you have a great holiday as well!
I always tell my clients I'm a step before a counselor or to be used while also seeing a therapist.
So interesting! I really appreciate your entire demeanor and your thorough explanations.
I always listen to people on TH-cam who are a good prospect to make sense, and consistency in what they say. As soon as I detect a discrepancy I never go to their channel again. There is one life coach I will listen to, three counselors, you one of them, and about ten narcissist subject speakers whatever they are called. Each one of them say the same information in a different way that is consistent while I learn about narcissm. They are along the same information lines you give out as well as the other counselors. I think they are doing a great job for those of us who can't see a counselor for whatever reason.
The problem with most life coaches is that most think they can just give advice and that's coaching. No, a good coach will help the individual to identify their very specific goal, help this individual excavate best possible solution from their current skill and to help develop on new ones, and execute this plan.
To be a life coach, you need to represent what you preach, you need to be successful prior to your life coaching business but most are just people that had no business ideas and they are really good at public speaking and motivating.
I do agree that the field can be sketchy, but I also think there are some gems out there that are doing a lot of good. I’m familiar with some life coaches who basically do CBT type stuff-analyzing your thoughts and how they relate to to your feelings and such. So I think life coaching can be good if you’re careful about who you work with.
Thanks for the video. I’m not in need of a life coach, thankfully, but I know some affected by/drawn to that field. There seems to be a set of hackneyed buzzwords and phrases that should be red flags to anyone looking for a coach. You touched on some of them. Others might be the highly suspicious “making six figures,” usually calculated with at least one decimal point, or “leave the 9-5 grind/work for yourself” which indicate an MLM agenda as well, ie the coach wants you to be a coach under their umbrella
I have been a registered psychologist for several decades. I have watched the development of ‘life coaching’ with interest and I have been particularly interested to observe colleagues enter this field. In every case I believe the career change was purely marketing, pandering to potential clients who are seeking help for their troubled lives. Yes, it’s a scam, and potentially a dangerous one.
This is really informative, thank you dr :)
And also the comments here. Sometimes it's worth to wait a day watching these videos, because I also get a lot of information from people's comments :)
It sounds to me like these Life Coaches are nothing more than motivational speakers. Hey, I'm all for watching a business motivation video before my job in sales. But I am trying to find a secret MLM company, because the videos I see, all the Life Coaches talk about is how they used a Life Coach... to become a Life Coach, and they help others... be a Life Coach. If you're not actually helping someone do better in business or school, then that's a pyramid scheme.
Funny, but one of the pop ads during this video was for a seminar to be a life coach!
Great, salient points. There are some good coaches out there, but many of them are stretching services into therapy, 'working on trauma' with clients, etc. In both counseling and coaching, I find most certifications are meaningless. There are exceptions I am aware of in the counseling field, certifications that are reflective of many hours of advanced training, ongoing supervision, and sustained supervised practice. The three-hour online training certification isn't worth the paper it's printed on. The training might be good, but the certificate doesn't mean much.
The last part of your video about a mature LMHC developing over time has me thinking about law enforcement. I think this could/should apply to police officers. I think the law enforcement community receives a bad wrap and rightfully so. I don't think all law enforcement officers are bad but I also don't think it is "only a few bad apples." I think law enforcement in general has a primary culture of toxic masculinity, aggression, and narcissism. I think all law enforcement officers should attend the police academy for a minimum of two years. Half of the academy could be dedicated to training for the harsher aspects of police work (e.g. violent gang encounters, car chases, etc.) and the other half of academy training could be dedicated to social work skills for use in police matters related to helping a mentally ill unhoused person, school truancy, missing people, etc.
If something does not change with law enforcement current way of operating, its bad reputation and inability to win over the trust of the communities that need it most will continue to degrade.
Very important topic to cover. The whole time I was wondering where life coaches be at anyway ? Like where do u find one ? Lol google and social media ? The most unprofessional platforms, not even in person or through referrals right ? On the other side of the elephant yes there should be an in between person that stays between clinical counseling and life skills coach, because sometimes a person does not necessarily need a diagnosis but a life coach or a friend. But maybe that’s what our family, siblings and friends roles are already and life coaches take that opportunity away. At the same time, there are people w no one, no family, no friend to talk to, and I wish there would be more regulations in this department of life coaching which the name itself sounds like a cult. AND even when a person thinks they have no one, they should know that’s not the case and seek clinical counseling immediately since it is a mental health issue. Life coaching could be helpful for someone who is stagnant, stuck and or could be afraid of going to a professional counselor or medical doctor, however, I think this is our families job to protect and take care of one another. I know I was blessed to have my sister be like my “life coach” when she nailed it hard on me and for this I am forever grateful. Thank you sis, I love you.
Life coaching is the Walmart of talk therapy. Be very careful what you share with these people.
I got burned by a popular TH-cam life coach. Spent months and months talking to them and sharing my feelings and pretty much entire life story.
This person turned out to be super weird and left me an angry voicemail when I missed an appointment. Literally told me to "go fuck myself" and said they are sick of my "Feeling sorry for myself bullshit".
Don't mistake a clown for a professional.
These people can be very dangerous to your mental health and more.
Depending on intentions. Power of intention can be applied by all people. People in the most so called qualified stations can and will direct interpretations in the way that best suite them. That is because, just like Lego Blocks, things can be built around. A Life Coach or a Counselor, or what Not. Are people that have lived a life of experiences. Rather Formal, or informal. That will take the time to talk with you and give their best input. Only You are the best judge of what you need to do in life. Science always changes. People need to learn to own themselves.
Coaches instruct and train, counselors advise .
One sees a personal trainer or coach for fitness .... one seeks counsel from an attorney ... isn’t this a duh kind of thing?
The truth is that we seek counsel and training unofficially from all sorts of personal and professional connections throughout our lives ... dr.grande has a great point in discussing the lack of necessary formal training and licensure needed to professionally life coach ... these professional coaches are setting forth a personally believed best way to successfully live a fulfilling life ... it could t be less scientific and more biased ... I speculate that most people know this going in, though.
I feel like life coaches can be a positive and negative. If a person is trained and have the skills and knowledge to successfully help others I think that a life coach could be very beneficial. A lot of people shy away from counselors or therapist because of the name and feeling like they are diagnosing them or the stigmas but life coach makes it seem more informal.
I never really put much stock into the concept of "life coaching"... and for good reason. I appreciate that Dr. Grande mentioned the financial aspect and individuals paying hundreds of dollars for unregulated, unspecified, "services" to an individual with little to no training. I completely agree that the process, training, and education to be a counselor/work in the human services is transformative in that it changes who you are and how you relate to others which would be hard - if not impossible to try and relay in the life coaching process.
Prior to this video, I had little knowledge regarding life coaching. However, I agree the process one must undergo to work within the human services profession is imperative in assisting one in developing their skills so they are competent individuals.
You are right using the word 'murky'. And I guess it is what you want it to be, be it good or not so good. Excellent description of what is out there. Thankyou Dr.
Thank you for another great video! You made some very interesting points. Maturity was the one that stood out to me the most because it is so true! Anyone can go in to receive their life coaching certificate and come out hours or months later and be very immature, incompetent, unskilled, and unknowledgeable. But the time it takes to become a counselor naturally matures a person. Veggie Queen makes a very valid point from her perspective and experience with a life coach though, too. She may have just gotten lucky though or spent a boatload of money. Speaking of, $100-1000 an hour is outrageous! Wow. Great info, thanks so much!
When I was married we worked with a life coach and I’m not going into the whole story but the results were devastating. I went to try to form a lawsuit but I couldn’t because they weren’t licensed. If somebody is not licensed they have nothing to lose and there’s nothing really you can do to them. That’s a real problem as far as responsibility and liability. I’m certain they’re a good people out there doing something nice but it’s still irresponsible. I have a friend who’s the psychiatrist that was working as a life coach and I respect that because he’s a trained professional.Ironically he could not give psychiatric advice because he wasn’t working as a doctor under that designated profession. Anyway I say no to it.
I know a few people that identify themselves as life coaches and can see where the differences lie in these two professions. I found the comment of some of these quick messages that you discussed as developing narcissism. That gave me something to think about Dr. Grande. I found this to be an interesting video. Thank you
Half these guys don’t even live by what they preach I just do it for free cause I love helping people I run landscaping company full time you should never do this for money people who do it for that just copy other life coaches ideas I do it because I been through so much hurt and I got through and helping people through what I went through and watching them get better is so rewarding to me
Most life coaches have little life experience. Definitely a scam.
I think this is an important video for people to see because there is a fine line between life coaching and licensed counseling. I like how Dr. Grande discussed the differences between the two.
Life coaches are often Cluster B disordered individuals who were abused as a child and genuinely want to help others overcome their pain. However, through life coaching they acquire innocent fuel from damaged people who need therapy through their word salad manipulation especially through social media. It should be regulated once you charge for services.
I notice that too. maybe they focus on helping others because they don't want to look at themselves and they get adoration and supply from their clients.
i've been looking into coaching because they seem more willing to disagree with you, tell you what you're doing is wrong and how to change it. the industry is ripe for scammers, but therapy has just been wildly ineffective, if i were a narcissist my experiences in therapy would have only made me worse because all they do is agree! how is it useful if they can't tell the client that what they're doing is fucked up? sure, i already knew, i knew before i even started, but the therapists' implicit agreement makes me think everything must be justified or else they'd SAY SOMETHING....right?
I agree with all your points. I believe life-coaching is treated on the same level as fitness-coaching with little pressure for regulation because bad coaching doesn't generally cause unacceptable widespread harm. At the very least they get to interact with someone, pay for their service and gain a memory of this experience on their life's journey. In the majority of negative experiences they can report them to trading standards or in more serious cases the legal system.
Wow! It sounds like with only two weekends of effort I can become a life coach and a crossfit instructor!
Yes and a guru too!
After watching licensed professionals in my state throw a temper tantrum about it in order to demonize 'coaches' (lead by a licensed therapist legislator of state congress), the controversy is pure politics. In my state, licensed therapists got upset because 'coaches' called themselves 'counselors' and successfully competed with them. Not all personal problems come from poor emotional health. In actuality, a 'coach' is a cognitive counselor and does not give mental health diagnosis. Improved performance is the measure of success rather than improved emotional experience. Any improved emotional health gained by coaching is a side affect of correctly perceiving a situation and learning how to deal with it. I recognize that there is overlap, but the focus of coaching is appropriate 'thinking' where the focus of counseling is appropriate 'emotions.' Clients might seek coaching first, before assuming there is something wrong with them requiring them to go on record with therapy. A coach should know what the difference is and should advise therapy when warranted.
"Rent a friend" is probably a good description. Some scoff at renting a friend, but many who want to make a change don't have family or friends or mentors at work to talk to. That being said, it also seems to be a field ripe with charlatans. If you're in the market for a life coach, you need to be doubly inquisitive and doubly skeptical.
You harnessed the power of my attention 20 years too late. Undoing the vague narcissistic notions about myself is expensive too