How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind with Todd Baratz - Terri Cole
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 มิ.ย. 2024
- I am so excited to have fellow therapist Todd Baratz on the show to talk about his new book, How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind: Forget the Fairy Tale and Get Real. You might know Todd on Instagram as @yourdiagnonsense, which is how I came across his amazing work.
Todd wrote this book for anyone feeling stuck in their relationship, and it was inspired by his own relationship struggles. As we mention in the interview, just because we're therapists doesn't mean we have it all figured out!
We cover a range of topics, from what inspired Todd to write this book and become a therapist specializing in sex, to the importance of differentiation in long-term relationships and intergenerational trauma.
I hope you enjoy this therapist jam as much as I did.
Time Stamps
0:00 - Quote from Todd
0:25 - Introduction from Terri
2:45 - Inspiration for the book
4:55 - Therapists aren't perfect
5:37 - Sex therapy
8:00 - Talking about sex
9:54 - Feeling stuck
11:02 - Interviewing parents
16:18 - What is actually toxic?
18:13 - Nature vs nurture
20:05 - Differentiating & codependency
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About Todd Baratz
Todd is a AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and a Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC NY 006459), with a Bachelors degree in Cultural Psychology from New York University and a Masters degree in Mental Health Counseling from the University of Miami. He's also a couples psychotherapist, podcast host, and writer.
Todd believes the societal definition of what is considered "normal" when it comes to mental health is limiting and can have a profound impact on how we view ourselves and others. He says, "The idea that there is a specific standard to which we should all conform creates a culture of comparison and judgement, leading to feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt and even illness. This is particularly harmful when coupled with the many societal systems of oppression that exist in our world, such as those based on gender, sexuality, race, socioeconomic status, and politics. These systems further perpetuate unrealistic expectations, emotional pain, and trauma, and can leave individuals feeling isolated, unsupported, and invalidated in their experiences. It is important to recognize that everyone's experiences are unique and valid, and that there is no one-size-fits-all definition of what is 'normal' when it comes to mental health."
Website: toddsbaratz.com
Book: www.toddsbaratz.com/book
IG: / yourdiagnonsense
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see www.terricole.com/
Connect With Me
Instagram: terricole.com/ig
Community: terricole.com/fbg
TC's VIPs: terricole.com/membership
Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
Resources
Boundary Boss Book: amzn.to/44DZID9
The Boundary Boss Workbook: amzn.to/3Ra7CRU
Insight Timer: insig.ht/cpKnbJB4KDb (I have a bunch of free meditations on here and love this app!)
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
www.terricole.com/gethelp/ -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
Please note: If you choose to sign up for BetterHelp or Insight Timer or buy through my Amazon links, I will receive a commission. Please know that I only recommend services and products that I know & trust.
#terricoleshow #relationshipexpert #codependencyrecovery
Let me know in the comments: what was your biggest takeaway from my conversation with Todd? Can you relate to what he shared? You can follow him on Instagram instagram.com/yourdiagnonsense + grab his book: www.prh.com/howtolovesomeone
For some reason, this episode triggered me while listing to it on Spotify. It felt like he didn’t want to be there but then seeing this interview via video my perception changed. Interesting how our senses play a major role in the way we interpret things from another person.
Very interesting convo/interview. Thank you, Terri and Todd! Funny thing... my relationship with my fiancé has taught me how to differentiate from my family of origin--and that it's ok (and normal and healthy!)--to have my own mind apart from the family hive. Seems so simple, but it's really challenging to do when you were raised in a codependent environment and by parents that never encouraged independence...In recent years I have really separated myself from family of origin (not cut ties) in that I make my own decisions, don't ask for their opinions or "permission." It bothers them that I have "broken away" in a sense, but I needed to do so for my own peace of mind and sense of self. Likewise, my fiancé and I are very different people who have our own interests etc.; met later in life and did not want to be absorbed into the other one even though there is a ton of love and respect for one another. We both believe that we all need to cultivate our own sense of self in this world.
Thank you for adding to the discussion, Birdie. Such a healthy perspective 👏👏👏
This guy was so rude when I offered my opposing view politely in instagram . He ended up blocking me😂. Many had similar experiences. Not all can be a Terri Cole or a Hailey Page my two forever favourites ❤❤❤😍
I'm sorry to hear that, GD. ❤️ I had Hailey on the pod a few years ago: th-cam.com/video/YsPx7of3VgY/w-d-xo.html
@@terri_cole omg Terri please don't apologise. Love u always my virtual mum😭😭😭. I'll look into the link. Blessings thank u 💕💕💕💕💕
Loving the term "humanizing our parents." Have just begun that with mine and it really does help so much.
So glad to hear that, Denise! ❤️
Compassion!compassion!compassion for self & others
that’s what I took away from it.
❤️
Yes of the bat, as a straight mAn.. I thought we were about to talk alot on the attachment nature's...stuck. so preemptive. I'm listen now 😊
It feels like he doesn't be here..
very disappointed. the video title does not reflect the conversation content.
I'd love Terri to invite Hailey Page or more women. This guy is not very pleasant and respectful to people online.
He doesnt seem like he went to school and graduated with a therapy degree using words like "toxic " to describe dysfunction just seemed a little amateur.
This guy gives me narcissistic vibes
Agree. All her guests r pretty cool. Try giving an opinion on his page and he blocks u. Never seen someone so strange.