There you go : 1- Persiste over time ( have patience ) 2- Take no offense 3- Make your motives genuine 4- Show respect 5- Search constantly for mutual purposes
For those people who thought this was useless, watch again. But this time, be more observant and let go of your ego. There are some useful lessons he has said in this video.
So interesting, and reading the comments I think this situation is more in a person you have a good/tolerable relationship with, than with someone you let yourself be influenced by your attacks, such as a father-daughter relationship in the video (the daughter tries to use the techniques and the father refuses)
Good point Julian. Albeit these skills are globally proven to work, the relationship may have broken down completely. Might need some external help or mediation. This is not a magic wand to cure all ailments.
Thanks April I only just noticed your comment. The Crucial Conversations skills are completely counter intuitive and based upon more than 30 years of research. Getting answers to help solve any problems, particularly really tough ones is difficult in a 3 minute video. It's a bit like reading the book Crucial Conversations and expecting to be an expert
For those who thought this is just an advertisement, that is not the intention. I think for those who want to be able to solve a potentially tough problem like getting someone to open up, a 3 -4 minute video is just an excerpt and won't help much. We recommend reading or listening the book 'Crucial Conversations'. It is based upon more than 30 years of research and millions around the world have been trained in these skills. It will make a big difference to helping you speak up when it is tough to do so.
what if their parent tells the other person you are a horrible evil person. I don’t care how much you try it won’t work. It didn’t work for me. I literally gave up. YEARS!!!!! and YEARS !!!! of really trying !!! BECAUSE OF HER MOTHER TELLING HER IM A HORRIBLE PERSON ! SHE BELIEVED IT !!! SO I GUESS IM A HORRIBLE PERSON IN HER EYES!! I DONT LIKE IT BUT I ACCEPTED REALITY !
Yes that is a challenge. Skills like won't solve the unsolvable and is not a magic wand. It can however give you the skills to ensure that challenges like this can be solved so that they do not spiral to this point. We often go into difficult conversations and make the situation worse without even realising it. We can then justify that we are right and blame the other person - and the spiral starts.
Thanks for your query. Without the skills to be able to speak up, it will always be difficult to open up without thinking you're going to say the wrong thing. You will need to start the conversation with being candid and honest about your concerns with having this conversation, because of past experiences - that maybe conversation last time did not go well. If you do not do this you could be setting yourself up for a 'Groundhog Day' experience. Same thing happens again and everyone knows it!
@EnthusiasticGamer There are alot of malicious, nosey ppl out there & wanna fish for info to use against you. I've been there. It's not easy opening up, I can relate. They don't respect those who are not willing to open up, or give benefit of the doubt. Many are suspicious & try to set you up or suck u in some drama or underestimate. Your experiences are lessons & they make you who you are. A few months ago, I heard I was bitter cuz I refuse to tolerate the B.S from males. Own your Truth. Be True to yourself & don't seek to be accepted by anyone. Too many ppl just fake out here, switching faster than my eyes blink
You said "If the person does not want to have a dialog it won't happen" then you tell the listener to be persistent over time. So your saying if invading their privacy at first does not succeed try again., i.e. F**K showing respect and keep pestering them until they break.
Good point David. I think the point is to know when to back off. The point of the video is that we can sometimes persist, and do so disrespectfully. Then you could get what you expect! But using the 'Fools Choice' as is taught in the training, you will have 'what's important to them' foremost in your mind. As it says below in a comment - make you motives clear and genuine.
There you go :
1- Persiste over time ( have patience )
2- Take no offense
3- Make your motives genuine
4- Show respect
5- Search constantly for mutual purposes
I am hard to open up and now I'm guilty. 😔 I'm so sorry for being like that. You guys have to take son much problem because of people like us. 😔
For those people who thought this was useless, watch again. But this time, be more observant and let go of your ego. There are some useful lessons he has said in this video.
Yessir!
So interesting, and reading the comments I think this situation is more in a person you have a good/tolerable relationship with, than with someone you let yourself be influenced by your attacks, such as a father-daughter relationship in the video (the daughter tries to use the techniques and the father refuses)
Good point Julian. Albeit these skills are globally proven to work, the relationship may have broken down completely. Might need some external help or mediation. This is not a magic wand to cure all ailments.
It’s an advertisement only no real information.
Thanks April I only just noticed your comment. The Crucial Conversations skills are completely counter intuitive and based upon more than 30 years of research. Getting answers to help solve any problems, particularly really tough ones is difficult in a 3 minute video. It's a bit like reading the book Crucial Conversations and expecting to be an expert
It's a shame too because this is a really good topic!
wrong, watch the video again. Clearly, you were not listening
you're wrong
This is the biggest problem in many peoples relationships, talking.
I’m really hoping my friend will talk to me again and will eventually want to hang out when he’s not only able to, but when he’s ready..
How did it go? Did you guys ever talk again?
For those who thought this is just an advertisement, that is not the intention. I think for those who want to be able to solve a potentially tough problem like getting someone to open up, a 3 -4 minute video is just an excerpt and won't help much. We recommend reading or listening the book 'Crucial Conversations'. It is based upon more than 30 years of research and millions around the world have been trained in these skills. It will make a big difference to helping you speak up when it is tough to do so.
I came across a reserved person once
How To Talk to Someone Who Doesn’t Want to Open Up aka How To Talk to Someone Who Refuses to Become Weak
It takes a lot of strength to willingly make yourself vulnerable like that, though.
My nosy boss keeps trying to get me to open up by sharing his own personal info. When he didn't get what he wanted he sent my colleague onto me!
Where is the book???
All you gotta do is to teach them to have a rich mindset.
what if their parent tells the other person you are a horrible evil person. I don’t care how much you try it won’t work. It didn’t work for me. I literally gave up. YEARS!!!!! and YEARS !!!! of really trying !!! BECAUSE OF HER MOTHER TELLING HER IM A HORRIBLE PERSON ! SHE BELIEVED IT !!! SO I GUESS IM A HORRIBLE PERSON IN HER EYES!! I DONT LIKE IT BUT I ACCEPTED REALITY !
Yes that is a challenge. Skills like won't solve the unsolvable and is not a magic wand. It can however give you the skills to ensure that challenges like this can be solved so that they do not spiral to this point. We often go into difficult conversations and make the situation worse without even realising it. We can then justify that we are right and blame the other person - and the spiral starts.
@@geoffflemming2235 Thank you, I understand.
What if you're the kind of person that doesn't open up easily to others, and doesn't like being VULNERABLE due to past experiences.
Thanks for your query. Without the skills to be able to speak up, it will always be difficult to open up without thinking you're going to say the wrong thing. You will need to start the conversation with being candid and honest about your concerns with having this conversation, because of past experiences - that maybe conversation last time did not go well. If you do not do this you could be setting yourself up for a 'Groundhog Day' experience. Same thing happens again and everyone knows it!
@EnthusiasticGamer There are alot of malicious, nosey ppl out there & wanna fish for info to use against you. I've been there. It's not easy opening up, I can relate.
They don't respect those who are not willing to open up, or give benefit of the doubt. Many are suspicious & try to set you up or suck u in some drama or underestimate.
Your experiences are lessons & they make you who you are.
A few months ago, I heard I was bitter cuz I refuse to tolerate the B.S from males. Own your Truth. Be True to yourself & don't seek to be accepted by anyone. Too many ppl just fake out here, switching faster than my eyes blink
You said "If the person does not want to have a dialog it won't happen" then you tell the listener to be persistent over time. So your saying if invading their privacy at first does not succeed try again., i.e. F**K showing respect and keep pestering them until they break.
Good point David. I think the point is to know when to back off. The point of the video is that we can sometimes persist, and do so disrespectfully. Then you could get what you expect! But using the 'Fools Choice' as is taught in the training, you will have 'what's important to them' foremost in your mind. As it says below in a comment - make you motives clear and genuine.
My boss tries this, it won't work!
It could have been easier to understand with a few examples.Can any one here come up with few examples.please....
Just an ad... No content in the video
Sounds good… but…
Irritating background music