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I didnt understand because I was looking for solutions coming from outside, because I think theres something wrong with me. I get corrected, I understand whats the problem but i cant seem to find the solution by myself. Hope it helps. I have discovered whats bothering me and I can track pretty much back to when i was a child. But i cant seem to find a solution when i am in need of it. I loose focus and loose balance
I'm not even really a gamer and I don't watch twitch, but I love this content so much more than most other psychology/therapy/personal-improvement oriented content because you do a phenomenal job of contextualizing things with a story, explaining the neurological mechanisms at play, and structuring it like a conversation. I feel engaged by your content and I always learn something about myself and, most importantly, I learn WHAT I need to address to fix these problems as well as your tips on how to address it, rather than just being told "just work harder, put your phone down, stay motivated..." by someone who just wants to tell people what to do for the sake of gaining a following.
I can relate so much to this. As a paramedic of over a decade, I used to get exceedingly frustrated when we would get a call while I was "doing" something to manage my boredom. It quickly devolved into me becoming jaded and disinterested with my profession. Tolerating my own boredom for a period of time led me to discovering creative writing and re-inspired my interest in the theoretical aspects of my profession. Strong work, and great video!
Yes! If you let yourself get angry when your gaming gets interrupted, you're conditioning your brain to have a negative reaction to that thing. When that thing is your career, you're putting yourself into dangerous territory
I'm generally prone to burnout, and I'm relieved to have come across Dr K's story/advice and your comment at the right time, because I've just begun EMT school. Glad to see that you're still going strong and connecting to the meaningful parts of your career! I'm keeping this in mind from now on.
I noticed I got this way with weed and with games. I've stopped both. Do you still play games or have you quit altogether? I would like to go back but can't see how they fit into my life anymore without them getting their hooks back in.
I've heard of this concept for ADHD called "Lightning in a Bottle", meaning that in order to get that spark or dopamine hit, you go and look at the things that made you want to do them in the first place (A journal of ideas, a mood board, etc.)and let me tell you, it works. But sometimes at the wrong times baha!
another one of those uncannily timed videos, I just started writing between calls yesterday and felt better despite spending all day fighting a major breakage at my workplace
I just watched this 4 times in a row to really embed it into my brain. Dealing with boredom is a huge problem for me and I always feel very unproductive. Amazing vid, thank you!
this is a really interesting video, I loved the story about being on call. I hope that you do more personalized "take away" videos like this, they're great.
Aside from the content of this video, which is incredibly valuable for me right now, I LOVE the design of the room you film in. The green accent wall with the white shelves and the plants, CHEFS KISS
As someone who's worked in a call center, I can definitely relate to Dr. K's experience with being on call. I noticed that when I spent time between calls browsing social media, I felt resentful whenever I was forced away from it, and because of that, working actually felt miserable. But when I didn't have time between calls, or if I just allowed myself to be bored, working was a lot more pleasant. And I can definitely second jotting down one's thoughts. After I began sketching a year ago, I've noticed that I've become a lot more naturally drawn towards being creative - whereas before, trying to do anything creative was incredibly hard. I'm still nowhere near the tipping point that Dr. K describes.
_I noticed that when I spent time between calls browsing social media, I felt resentful whenever I was forced away from it, and because of that, working actually felt miserable. But when I didn't have time between calls, or if I just allowed myself to be bored, working was a lot more pleasant._ 🤦♂👏wow that hit hard thank you
Meanwhile I actually need breaks to not be miserable and can't stand it if I have to juggle multiple rush jobs (does not happen often, but when it does, vert stressful). My previous job had a big workload and unrealistic expectations of what a 4 man service desk can do within a big office that has upto 5000 employees. That stress og that clustercluck made me really toy with the idea of jumping off the bridge I was walking on everyday and that was only part of the reason I quit. The fact they did not pay me for 2 months did not help (got paid after plenty of threats, some of which I made good on by quitting). I got zero tolerance on having my pay messed with.
This is a great middle piece between 'Is Progress in Gaming Destroying your Real Life' and 'Why Video Games Are Hard To Put Down' and 'Dr. K, how do I Focus?'. Your ideas actually hang together as a complete system to understand the self and rewrite our behavior in a holistic way. Literally the first self help guru who has helped me to help myself. Thanks for the continued work 👍📿📿📿
I had a similar experience happen to me!! I work in an inpatient psychiatric and we can't use our cell phones on floor. I have ADHD and i need something to take notes with to remember everything. I found i started jolting down notes and ideas to help my patients in my notebook when i had free time. I also draw and color in it now too and i find its much much easier to pay attention while coloring then just staring down a hall. I find that I cannot stop writing ideas now even at home. I used to only care about video games, now all I want to do is to use my ideas to help my patients. I love my job now.
I'm a teacher with ADHD and I use my downtime to plan lessons and think about what I want to do throughout the week. It doesn't feel like "toxic productivity" to me because, as you know, you have to leverage your productivity when you can and I would rather use my spurts of creative freedom than squander it.
It seems like the editor finally chilled out a bit with this video. This video reminds me of the OG content when he was just chilling and talking to us. Love it! It's still pretty cut and pasted but it's not as jarring as previous videos so it feels more like I'm listening to a lecture rather than some other type of content
I've been a competitive PC gamer for over a decade now, and many times I've found myself sitting for 12+ hours grinding Rust or League. I still casually return to those games sometimes but as Dr.K says at the very end of the video, once you reach a point where you actually become distracted FROM THE GAME because you have a handful of creative thoughts to pursue, things really do begin to swing in your favor. The smile at the end tells it all, and it's very satisfying to know that I can honestly say I've done the work and can now connect with that feeling he explains. Even though I'm not where I want to be professionally, I've been on a great path for the last few years and can't wait to see what the future holds.
Man I'm so glad I decided to watch this video while bored at work 🤣I'm a programmer and things can get very chaotic. But also a lot of the time there's not much to do and not a lot of pressure to do what little needs to be done (especially now that it's summer where I live, since most clients are on vacations), so I end up getting bored and watching TH-cam and procrastinating way too much. After watching this I unironically feel so motivated to just close YT and get everything done so I can have time to be productive in other stuff, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do now :) Thanks doc!
You sure that was his message? I thought it wasn’t about making time for productivity which is what I am currently understanding about your take away. I understood it as using small amounts of time to get in touch with your creativity and then to review your creative impulses and that in the long term (years even) would grow into true motivation to be productive rather than using willpower to force productivity. Let’s face it, we all know what productivity is but we fail at willing it in ourselves. To be more than a temporary situation we must have an internal motivation coming from our essential self and core values.
Programmer here with similar problem. I agree with the other responder, what you've described sounds to me like a burst of productivity, not the self-fueling cycle of creativity
Dude, i love you! I have never been a gamer, but I am ADD and a mother of 4 boys who are ADHD, ages 16, 29, 37 and 39.What I connect with is your train of thought, and wanting to help others around you. I connect with their friends and everyone I meet. My mind is always problem solving. I super appreciate your videos about people with diagnosis's. I realized my daughter in law is borderline, and you have helped me deal with that. Your interview with the guy planning the school shooting was amazing! That poor guy should have had help, God bless the cheer leader reaching out to him! He really touched on so many problems with our society. I hope you can reach more people to share your knowledge and promote psychiatric help. You are showing people therapy is not scary or judgmental. Thank you!
Hitting professional tipping point Makes you want to work. Attitude of wanting to be productive. Now I started to enjoy the dopamine activity more. So much momentum from the indrias, after playing game mind is filed with thoughts of wanting to be productive. Once you hit that point, life becomes easy.
I am constantly in shock at how you're able to put form to thought considerations I have. I have been doing this completely unknowingly since I was 5 years old and the whole way through I was constantly discouraged from it (likely early ADHD showing its teeth since I'd focus too much on it, I'm diagnosed now!). It became my method of maintaining sanity at work, and my most successful jobs were ones that I could get away with it. I found I used to be in a loop of wanting to play games and then wanting to think of ideas, but lately I only ever want to play a game if for an idea! I thought I was broken but just this shift in perspective has enlightened me to how I've actually grown. Thank you.
This guy is gem. His ideas, suggestions, and methods actually works not like others random people on the internet who talks so excessively but eventually come to no point that can actually practically work. I saw only a few videos but every time I saw he surprised me because he is most relatable guy and I can actually think much more creatively after watching such videos.
Randomly saw this on my feed and really needed to hear it. There are so many creative pursuits of mine that have sat still for years because I haven't committed that continued focus on them and have convinced myself I never have the energy for anything after a day's work than playing a game. Instant subscribe. Thank you for sharing this insight!
This really resonates with some realizations I came too recently. Particularly that walking away from a game didn’t mean I was actually away - I’d be reading guides, discussing on Reddit, reading patch notes etc. When I started to feel empty I couldn’t put my finger on why, until I started following impulses outside of gaming. I’ve started to look at some of those creative impulses and take action and it’s wild to see the life I am living now vs where I was even a year ago Productivity used to intimidate me, I never could understand people who I viewed as always “on.” What could anyone get out of working so hard? I would think. Wholeness, is what I’m finding.
Well it depends on what they mean with ""Productivity"" I hate that Word because where i grew up, being ""Productiv"" means working even more extra Hours at your Work for verry little Money.
You made me realize that I practiced this on my own yesterday before ever watching this video. It was Sunday and I kpet bouncing between games and youtube, not really enjoying any of it. I was about to jump back onto a game but I was hit with "do I really want to do that?" So I sat with that thought for a min and started doing things OFF SCREEN. Felt good :)
This is such a better way of looking at this. So much of my thinking around this was "if I don't get better at this, I'll die without ever doing anything worthwhile". It's so helpful to hear it framed as a "tipping point" - a point anyone can reach, after which harnessing your creative energy becomes easier.
I'm so happy to have come across your channel because I had the idea that maybe I should step back a bit from video games and meanwhile, every time I'm driving I have room in my head, so I started making memos about creativity (I'm a musician) and the more I was doing it, the more it became pleasant. I never made a relation between this activity and the video game addiction. I was on the right path, and I just needed someone to tell me, "You should do more of this until your video game addiction steps back naturally." I'll watch all your videos and start building from there. Thank you so much.
a few months ago I wouldn't have believed it but I am now going through this tipping point. It wasn't a conscious choice like yours, or I guess maybe it was just a little different; I was playing video games and smoking weed so much that eventually I built up a resistance to both and neither would "do it" for me anymore. I got so tired of being bored and procrastinating that the only thing left I hadn't done in a while was try. So I picked up a guitar and tried. I picked up a book and tried. Like you said it started slow but eventually those few seeds I was able to capture bore the fruit that is maintaining me right now. Now I'm back on track to finishing my career and reconnecting with the people that matter to me. And becoming once again a person who will matter to others. You describe it so well and sometimes I feel bad for looking at some of these videos or outside sources instead of refining these sentiments and thoughts on my own into their own unique shape but then I remember that that option never really goes away. The way I described it initially was that I finally got bored of being bored, and leaned into it. Glad to see how far the channel has come and that you are still keeping it true to the core. Much love
For me, this is the best educational channel on TH-cam hands down. There I see the discussion of real problems that I have and see concrete advice to follow, divided into steps, even. Thank you for this!
This helps me understand my most creative and fulfilling time in my life, and the deep depression that followed. I think I self sabotaged myself so bad when covid lockdown hit, that I neglected and killed the 'grove', which turned it from a source of rich stimulating self-amplifying fruits, to a dark pit of rotting compost that I drowned in.
Ty DrK , after playing 1h30mins of WoW after not playing videogames for 2 months I felt a huge pike in stress and also a big dopamine drop, And then a bigger dopamine drop because it made me think that I will probably not play videogames anymore. So hearing that you can find balance while being productive gives me hope. Ty DrK
I'm at the most difficult point in my life in terms of video game (and various other) addictions, lack of motivation and willpower, and it's really ruining my life. I haven't worked or left the house since covid. Luckily the RNG GODS imparted a gift upon me and my graphics card crapped out during yesterday's gaming binge and I won't be buying another PC until I turn myself around. I found your channel this morning and I can't get enough. In a single day i've learned how my mind works, how to appreciate meditation and utilize boredom to my benefit, how to shape the environment around me to set myself up for success, how emotions and imposter syndrome are shitting on my parade, and how to reset my dopamine system. Thank you for helping me reach my professional tipping point RIGHT NOW and turning my life around.
Absolutely proud of you for taking that leap! I can tell you for a fact that it’s incredibly easy to become addicted to video games when you’ve got nothing going on. It’ll be tough, but ultimately you’ll chase more creative endeavours. I myself have gave my ps4/ps3 away for 30 days, or at least until I’ve turned my life around. I think the key to having a healthy relationship with games is to have enough fulfilment in your life so that you don’t rely on games for your dopamine hit.
Been addicted to Old school runescape. I’ve logged 108 days of play time since Nov 2018. Im so happy I came across this channel - it’s really making me notice key things I need to work as someone with ADHD. I don’t want to be addicted to weed and video games anymore.
Honestly, the things your describing are what have started happening to me. I have a lot of shame and Ive opened up to my family. Ive always wanted to make a comic book and once i started chasing that, realizations about how i see myself came to light, all the Dr. K, philosophy, and experiences finally clicked into place and im getting astronomically better for my own sake. It is really bizzare 😂
I love how detailed your awareness and communication is of your psychological processes, behaviour, and how their interactions contribute to this critical type of development! I think this is very insightful and uniquely encouraging because of how relatable the details are in terms of the experience.
Thanks man - your videos make so much sense to me and have been more helpful to me than all the others I've seen all put together. Your content has made a huge impact on my life. I'm 47 and struggled my whole life to come to terms with myself, and it feels like I finally have the tools to start climbing that hill. Short story - I've been wanting to get back into learning Python programming and tinkering with microelectronics for almost 2 years now. Yet every time I sit in front of my PC I rather try to find entertainment in one of my many games. I stopped having fun playing games a few months back and have become aware I need to give it a break. Your video motivated me to swap PC's with my son - I set up the flashy Windows gaming desktop for him, and set up his small form factor repurposed office PC with Linux, dev tools and ebook reader for myself. He's having fun exploring the world of PC gaming - I'm lucky that he leans towards what I call "learning and fun" (games like Spore, Minecraft, etc) so I don't have to babysit him too much. And I'm having fun learning Linux and have less distractions from more constructive pursuits when I sit at my PC. Everybody wins and not a cent spent.
This video is the single most valuable video on the entire platform. I am so glad I found this channel. Thank you, Dr. K and Team for creating these videos and making this information so freely accessible. Keep up the good work 🙏🙏
That idea of "riding my boredom" is exactly what I need the most right now. I often find myself wanting to do things that I care about but then certain thoughts start to arise and I reasolve to my impulses like some primitive caveman. I'll try that out and see how it works for me!
This is really profound for me. Ive had this same idea even though ive not thougt about it in such a holistic way and this video really made it click for me. I'm currently trying to reduce my amount of distraction with entertainment as ive started with ADHD medication at the age of 30. Ive built up so many bad habits during my life and it's very hard to break them, but i finally feel able to do it due to the meds. As a musician ive always had tons of little ideas that i record on my phone (like journaling) but i just leave them there. Ive had a lot of anxiety about that which has just magnified the problem but i never thought about going back to just reflect on those ideas as a way to cultivate my creativity.
This video spoke to me soooo much. I have had a lot of “boring time” at work, and eventually even TH-cam/podcasts became boring, and my brain started to explore creative outlets more. Which is more exciting and rewarding to me, and even if I couldn’t work on it at work I would write down every thought I had about it.
I love this. I'm not a gamer but I do have a weed addiction/habit that meant daily use for many years. People like to generalise with drug use that it's down to past traumas, but I honestly think it's down to boredom. My mind is so used to being entertained/high in the evenings that when I don't have that stimulus it freaks out. I've been managing it over the past few months and my life is way better without it. Really good tips on harnessing your creative ideas as well. Thanks as always Doc 🙏🏽
I had to decide that I was in a codependent, abusive relationship with gaming developers who demanded I ignore their deliberate gaslighting to manipulate my behavior into time-sucking labor. The game, if it was based on factual ability stats, transparent matchmaking and true freedom of association/disassociation - was not inherently addictive. What’s “addictive” is forcing players into a codependent whirlpool of algorithmic gaslighting where they lust for fair validation, constantly encounter unfair rejection, and are denied meaningful proportional data about their part in the product’s worldwide metrics.
"Fair" matchmaking was deemed as "less than optimal" as it does a poor job at keeping people playing. What they do instead is a game of roulette, where the difficulty is curated by strategically facing stronger opponents against weaker opponents. It does 2 things. It gives the stronger player validation that they are a good player, they got their payoff. For the weaker player, it angers them, which ironically increases engagement. They were denied their dopamine hit. They must play another match for it. And when it happens again, they must play another match for it. Basically, instead of using matchmaking to make fairer games, the most popular games use it to make less fair games. Where matchmaking actually is plotting against you, as negative emotions are more likely to keep you playing.
My thought process has changed so much, all thanks to you. Unfortunately, personally for me, two years of psychiatrist appointments, medicine and weekly therapist haven't helped as much. Discovering your channel was validating and truly eye-opening. Thank you so much!
This is *the* subject that speaks directly to me, and I don't even play video games, I watch TH-cam. For years now I've been dumbfounded and immensely annoyed by the fact that the thing I enjoy most is being productive/getting concrete things done, but most of the time I just can't get myself to do anything aside just wasting time and feeling miserable for having thrown the whole day to the trash with nothing to show for it (*both* during the activity and after). It seems like such an obvious paradox: door A has "AVOID, this mostly feels bad and always makes you feel bad after" written on it, but it's what open most of the time instead of door B that says "You should pick this one since you always have had fun doing it, and you always feel good for having done it.". It feels so obviously wrong, but it's how my mind functions most of the time for some reason.
This is great. Just recently I realized "I'm really good at procrastinating, so maybe I should use that to my advantage." When I have an impulse to do something because I'm bored that's not productive I try to at least think "ok let's at least brush my teeth and take the trash out" And sometimes that gets me on a dopamine train of accomplishing shit unless I'm just really truly exhausted. Then next thing know I spent an hour cleaning and just letting my mind wander and by the time I'm done I no longer want to drink or game I prolly want to build legos or work in my garden.
Something I have learned regarding dealing with creativity and boredom (11:54) is how to “double reward” my creativity. For example (I’m an artist) when I get an idea of something to draw, my first impulse is to turn on a video to listen to because that’s half the fun of art for me, but instead I’ll make myself work and develop my idea for 15-30 minutes to which greatly increases my creativity and when I’ve fully mapped everything out I’ll turn on a video
I just wanted to be good at something and figured it would be easier to get good at games since I enjoy them more. But I am too bad at games for that. But even when I didn't play video games for 4 months, I had no motivation to do anything. I think life itself just wears me out and I am constantly burnt out and have no option but to keep on going. I just want to sit in my room all day and never leave.
I can understand this. I found a creative outlet and instead of wanting to just go home and play games, I find myself wanting to work on that creative outlet more than actually playing games while I am bored.
I think I can confidently say that I've overcome game addiction but I am struggling with internet addiction. It's the addiction that I seem to have a deep attachment to and live on autopilot everyday to feed it. I feel like I've neared my professional tipping point so many times but never ventured past the tip.
One of the things i really have to work on is not being scared of being bored. I have gotten to the point where i get anxious when i let my thoughts roam freely. So if i do get bored i always try to fill the gap to prevent this anxious feeling. I think it is gonna take a lot of work but knowing that i shouldnt be scared of it might help me reduce the anxiousness a little
I used to feel like this a lot. For me, it was depression-related; I used to think a lot of super dark thoughts. Some things that helped me were figuring out why I was afraid of thinking those thoughts, learning how to untangle myself from them (and see them more as just thoughts), and getting treatment for depression. The "white noise" of random thoughts became a lot more tolerable/manageable.
Thank you so much for this! This is something I really needed because I've been struggling with feeding my boredom that I've lost so much productive energy. This is the direction I want to head towards :)
this video is actually so helpful. The advice about paying attention to your creative impulses is so true. I do this with music and I never even realized it. The nice thing about investing more into your creative impulses is that you actually get satisfaction out of it. I mindlessly play video games all day and feel dissatisfaction or nothing at all, but just spending half an hour writing feels so satisfying, and I can even look back on what I did and feel the same way.
I understand this, but I struggle with it as well. I used to work at a gas station. I captured my creative impulses by writing in the morning hours when no one was at the pump. I got my first book finished this way. I've finished 3 books thus far. I haven't stopped the train per se; I still create (I've channeled it into other pursuits as well). But I don't see my writing as productive. I don't get the feedback I need to pursue them. I don't worry about the creativity, I get discouraged by the lack of feedback (even if the feedback I get is encouraging) or just the ability to implement my ideas. Example: I have three books, have tried for years to get them published, eventually gave up because I couldn't keep doing that with my dwindling free time. I struggle because these pursuits haven't borne professional/societal fruit. They've definitely been personally helpful, but they haven't had the impact or spread that I think they should have.
@@VioletEmerald yeah, I self-published my second one actually. Years back (almost 10 years ago) on Amazon when that was really gaining steam. I've sold about 200 copies total. And that was my cringe book X) ie one that you'd expect a newbie writer with decent word craft but no experience to make. I gave it the works too, went to writing conferences to get feedback (and got good feedback from published/well known authors) etc. The next book took almost 9 years to finish, because I went through college and a lot of really shitty life events. I'm proud of it, but it's really not something that's self-publishable. I'd need a lot of help to get it to the audience that would really benefit from it. I'd also need a very good sensitivity reader. It would need a pretty epic rewrite that really just needs professional eyes to guide it and get it done in a reasonable timeframe. Navigating that world has never been easy, but self publishing really killed the approach where you could network with a publisher to submit a good complete draft. Traditional publishing pretty much now requires you to already have an audience (it's guaranteed money), and I don't have the money or time to pursue that or the editing/etc services I'd need to compete. Takes away from writing and other goals. I'm sure there are good audiences and pockets where I could find a niche, but I'd need someone to take a risk on me, and no one has. I'm just...tired of having to work on the parts I have no control over. I've also reached out to various writer groups over the years. I'm part of a local artist group where I share things on occasion. It's great and I've continued my craft as a result, but it's never really led where I've wanted it to. Dr. K's videos on desires vs values have helped a lot with all of this, as has a lot of therapy regarding my own self worth (the whole pursuit left me feeling worthless), so I'm in a decent place mentally FYI. Got diagnosed with ADHD 3 years ago and my life has turned around a lot. Mostly I'm just frustrated that a lot of the things I pursue don't take off, and tired of the persistence play when I have the rest of my life I need to live.
Thank you for this This year I started my professional life after graduating from university, and it has been a constant learning about my own discipline. Although everything has turned out well so far, it has not been easy and every day I have been able to learn more about myself professionally.
@8:45 I relate a lot. When I was using a white board daily, it helped me wake up and have a display with ideas of things to do or what needs to get done. And while reading those things it would remind me of other things. And then I got extra dopamine by being able to wipe off the task or check it off when I finished.
I did actually feel this in regards to checking my phone and stuff at work i.e. not doing it make work more pleasant. Can't relate to capturing creative thoughts though. Upon reflection, I always just cross out my "creative" ideas as trash because they are.
Must be nice to have a job that actually enables creativity to some degree. Nothing in my field needs creativity nor productivity for all that matters, and sure as hell it does not have any "dead time". The shift is a full on throttle from start to finish. There would be no reason for me to actually endure boredom when I'm not working and I don't have to do something else, hence why I started playing videogames. Good insight though, it's always so interesting to hear other's experiences.
Great video as always! One thing I'd like to add from another Dr. K video I saw is for people with low conscientiousness (trait of motivation) to not think they've achieved some type of motivated state whenever they get to the point Dr. K described where you can play a game and it seemingly having no impact on your productivity. In that video he talks about utilizing a hypothetical bank of motivation where some activities withdraw from your motivation bank and others deposit into it (gaming would for instance require a withdrawal), and that it is important to realize how if this is your method of motivation, i.e. you don't have a trait to constantly motivate you, then you will never achieve some type of immunity from falling back into the hole you've just climbed out of, it gets a hell of a lot easier to maintain that state of motivation, but I say this as some one who has let himself believe that I was finally out and experienced this kind of gaming where it doesn't seemingly affect you, but slowly and surely the frequency of games ramp up and all of a sudden I was back in the degenerate addict lifestyle where I started, all because I thought I was finally out for good. This may sound incredibly negative but like I said, when you're out it's so easy to keep yourself motivated, all you have to do is realize that there's always a risk and warnings will start to pop up in your head whenever you're slipping a bit. I'm currently doing great with a post-it note on my bathroom mirror that reads "Once an addict, always an addict" as a reminder. Best of luck!
Love the concept of procrastinating on your vices. I do this sometimes. Also when life gets hard I tell myself that the only good thing to procrastinate on is quitting.
Had to go basically homeless to cure my addiction, I use to put my whole being into gaming , didn’t matter the game , but I was running from myself. I turn 30 in April and I know I need to reprogram myself if I want to live a fulfilling life. They tell me it’s not real , Gaming has nothing to do with real life…All in All , I don’t wanna bother anyone, or hurt anyone physically or verbally. I just want to stop wasting my time on what everyone thinks of me , and find confidence in myself… Godspeed Y’all
One of my fave HG videos. Took notes on the three steps and Indriya. Really have to sirround yourself with things that you want to do more of. Definitely will not be pulling out my shows next time im on the plane. Riding out boredom instead. Really lost touch with creative impulses after getting a corporate job. Need to get back into it!
Great point! But sometimes games, movies etc are not only good for me but necessary. It feeds my cultural emotional tank of ideas, thoughts, atmospheres etc. Videogames literally saved my soul (alongside with music) in my teens and many of my world views and tastes are defined by such games as Gothic, Morrowind, HOMM3, Evil Islands, Unreal Tournament '99 etc. I consist of it at this point. And I'm not playing anymore for decade or two... almost don't watch movies, only music is as important for me as ever. And it's sad. I mean, yes, I started to read more as a substitution, but it's not enough. Sometimes I make myself watch or play something and my life literally become more soulful, emotional, happy and motivated. Games, movies and books deprivation leads to "growing up" - you become that old grumpy empty shell, never ever let yourself sink as low as being "grown up" in this meaning. Always be wide-eyed, happy and eager for life. Hardly it's possible without cultural emotional food.
this super helpful to me, I am dealing with some kind of identity crisis after i stop playing video game for like 1 week. What you just said is kinda happened to me, I survived the boredom and now my mind is kinda thinking about something that I have to do. Our brain is so interesting.
I started doing this without realising it when I decided to create content for my TH-cam channel. Even though it isn't much, I'm happy with my work and am always thinking making more. Somehow, even after a month, I still feel the need to keep going.
Thank you for this video. After watching I put my phone down and loaded the dishwasher and then spent an hour and a half cleaning out my closet. I had the urge to pick up my phone several times but it really didn’t take much effort to resist and just go back to what I was doing.
This video is so funny to me. Your help (videos and Dr. K's guide) got me to the professional tipping point in my work as an attorney over the course of the last year. And I just saw this video for the first time tonight!
This video from an ideology perspective speaks to why I like fighting games so much. A lot of habits like watching replays and reflecting have been great tools to carry into the workforce for me. It's a big contributor to my success.
It came to me (thankfully) after having my daughter. If I'm not taking care of her I'm cleaning up or working out, or doing something else productive. I still miss gaming but I can't even bring myself to even watch gameplay a lot of the time because I know the urge will just go unfulfilled. I'm a lot more engaged at work now because I see it as an extension of taking care of her. At lunchtime I used to watch league videos to decompress from the work. Now I use that time to do 30 minute meditations. I sometimes get upset I never got to this point earlier, but I know it's partly just my PFC reaching full maturity (turning 30 soon).
Hey Dr.K! Really love this video as a writer/creative this is really reassuring and something I've slowly been discovering myself so, hearing you put it into words helps! I do have a question though. Sometimes I get the "creative impulses" but stop myself from capturing them. I'm not absolutely sure why this happens because I really do want to be productive - I think I get stuck in not knowing how to properly capture my ideas in a way that they can be useful later on without there being a huge learning curve that distracts from the actual creative process. To give an analogy it's like if I had a story I wanted to animate but then I have to spend more time learning how to use animation software instead of actually creating the story but if I don't learn the software it's hard to turn my ideas into something valuable and useful and so, I feel like my creativity isn't productive and avoid doing it all together. Essentially how do you turn writing or ideas in general into a bigger project and not feel like you're just in the void doing things with no idea how it could become anything?
I think you may be overwhelming yourself with the idea of a perfect outcome / finished product, which is impossible. It's strange that you separate the "learning curve" from the creative process because you actually learn from pursuing that creative idea. Sure, you can task yourself with the goal of learning the entirety of a software before using it. But doesn't it make more sense to learn it as you need to use it? For any creative pursuit, you ought to have fun with it, fail as much as you possibly can, and learn from that.
If you really want to make something of your ideas the unfortunate reality is that you need to learn the tools for it sooner or later. There's no way around it. At first it'll be frustrating and you really won't get the results you want, especially if you work on something you're passionate about instead of something that's deliberate practice, but it's a necessary part of the process. Also, if you need to prepare yourself that not everything about the making the idea come to life will be part of that passionate creative process. Animation especially, as it takes so much effort for small results. But if you don't let that scare you you really can end up making amazing stuff and feel so much satisfaction about making *your own* ideas.
Going to apply this to boost my daily drawing sessions, feel like it's going to work. Now i only need something to do boost my mood when i feel awful about t the outcome of my hours.
I often feel a sense of FOMO when I barely am able to keep in touch with old raid members who have moved onto the next group raids and run out of things to say that we mutually can speak about since the game is no longer a common experience for us. It is tempting to jump back in and experience the hype and work towards a goal as a team to experience together. But I know that I was playing that game in my lowest moments, when my career was going nowhere and I didn't have any luck in my personal life. In a way I knew that gaming was not making it any better, and that online friendships while genuine, cannot substitute for the same real life goal oriented friends I needed to surround myself with to help manifest my intrinsic motivation. The social aspect of video games is truly a double edged sword. I got lucky that things changed within my game group and people had different expectations moving forward (TL;DR: some people wanted to push for more hours to clear faster, others were older and wanted to chill with the goal of clearing eventually), and I got an opportunity to bridge into my career choice down the line that busied myself immensely to prevent me from committing to spending time on Discord or a game. I'm in a sweet spot now where I'm back on track for my career (better late than never!) and at my work place we have a group of 'gamer girls' whom all of us play games very much SECONDARY to our careers and personal relationships. We don't even play the same games or we all play single player games. Surrounding myself with these like-minded people whom I can keep my game-addict levels minimal with that external validation, helps keep me on track for my internal values. Keeping myself busy with other things and hobbies (I picked up a lot of crafting and food hobbies to share with people IRL with TANGIBLE, LASTING products attained) keeps me from tumbling down the endless game cycle addict wheel. There are still days I game for 14+ hours in a row. But those days are for when I know that everything else in my life is squared away and it is on MY schedule without feeling pressure to game. Sitting down to game without those other things in my life taken care of feels so uncomfortable now, it's distracting me from getting into the game because of this natural hierarchy of To Do's that has been ingrained into me by habit by now. I really like this balance and I'm so happy to hear it validated on this video!
A fantastic video, Dr. K. I would like to add that, even when you are having fun with dopaminergic activities you still are productive after getting over that tipping point. You are more able to connect important ideas and integrate them into the play, making it a incredible opportunity for social learning of everyone involved.
As someone who's been watching these videos for over a year Dr K's mentioned this a ton and I'm sure I'll never keep this up as a routine beyond just 2 weeks
We always talk about having a Goal and becoming something, but what if i just do not want to have a Goal or any meaning in Life, i just want to be left alone and enjoy myself doing stuff i like doing? I do enjoy playing Videogames very much, i also have Interests in some stuff, but i never actually start doing them, cause they need effort and i hate to make effort. Videogames are also something, i definitly do not want to be gone in my Life, i just get too much joy out of them, but i do not get Joy of almost anything else. Sure i like being out with Friends sometimes, but then i am again just too Introverted so i cut off my Friends after 2 Weeks for the next Years until i feel lonley again. I am pretty much happy with my Life, i know i could do more and better things, but i also don't really want to do those things. Not sure if i am just weird, but i actually don't care about being a better Version of myself, i just want to be left alone in piece xD. I also think i am not addicted, cause if i have stuff to do, to have my Games ect. still in my Life i actually do them first, before playing and also don't really miss Games, if i do stuff that make me not being able to play Games for Weeks or even Months. Idk if my English even make Sense, but idk i really don't enjoy the Idea of giving up Games, who tf wants to play Games 30min a Week or Day, lol. Maybe this Video is also not made for me, but i get a little Angry, if it is about stop playing Games xD. 17:38 Idk man, all this sounds weird to me. Maybe i am just a Neet.
I've already drastically changed my productivity since seeing this video. I just chill, maybe read a book, walk, or listen to ambience when I don't have impulses
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@HeathyGamerGG Mr editor, the timestamp for the Grammarly ad is wrong. It ends at 2:09
was it worth it? yes
Gramarly is white hot dog poopy but my genuine respect to y’all for taking on sponsorships! Keep up the good work HG team :)
Can you make video about non verbal learning disorder?
I didnt understand because I was looking for solutions coming from outside, because I think theres something wrong with me. I get corrected, I understand whats the problem but i cant seem to find the solution by myself. Hope it helps. I have discovered whats bothering me and I can track pretty much back to when i was a child. But i cant seem to find a solution when i am in need of it. I loose focus and loose balance
I'm not even really a gamer and I don't watch twitch, but I love this content so much more than most other psychology/therapy/personal-improvement oriented content because you do a phenomenal job of contextualizing things with a story, explaining the neurological mechanisms at play, and structuring it like a conversation. I feel engaged by your content and I always learn something about myself and, most importantly, I learn WHAT I need to address to fix these problems as well as your tips on how to address it, rather than just being told "just work harder, put your phone down, stay motivated..." by someone who just wants to tell people what to do for the sake of gaining a following.
Yep, same. I'm not a gamer, but Dr K is my favorite and I've learned so much and made such a difference in my life.
@Tim Gehrsitz Same here, and brilliantly put.
Exactly my thoughts
Me too!
What's so great about dr.K is that he gives acknowledgement to a person's thoughts feelings and experiences, it's amazing
I can relate so much to this. As a paramedic of over a decade, I used to get exceedingly frustrated when we would get a call while I was "doing" something to manage my boredom.
It quickly devolved into me becoming jaded and disinterested with my profession. Tolerating my own boredom for a period of time led me to discovering creative writing and re-inspired my interest in the theoretical aspects of my profession. Strong work, and great video!
Congrats! This is super hard to do, attempting to do it myself with a new work from home job! Keep it up!
Yes! If you let yourself get angry when your gaming gets interrupted, you're conditioning your brain to have a negative reaction to that thing. When that thing is your career, you're putting yourself into dangerous territory
I'm generally prone to burnout, and I'm relieved to have come across Dr K's story/advice and your comment at the right time, because I've just begun EMT school. Glad to see that you're still going strong and connecting to the meaningful parts of your career! I'm keeping this in mind from now on.
I noticed I got this way with weed and with games. I've stopped both. Do you still play games or have you quit altogether? I would like to go back but can't see how they fit into my life anymore without them getting their hooks back in.
Man this is really relatable, I just realized I started hating my profession ever since I worked the night shift version for a year.
I've heard of this concept for ADHD called "Lightning in a Bottle", meaning that in order to get that spark or dopamine hit, you go and look at the things that made you want to do them in the first place (A journal of ideas, a mood board, etc.)and let me tell you, it works. But sometimes at the wrong times baha!
Have any resources for this? All I can find on google is a book about entrepreneurship but I feel this concept would help me and I want to learn more.
another one of those uncannily timed videos, I just started writing between calls yesterday and felt better despite spending all day fighting a major breakage at my workplace
Congrats! I’m in the same boat, good luck to us moving forward!
I just watched this 4 times in a row to really embed it into my brain. Dealing with boredom is a huge problem for me and I always feel very unproductive. Amazing vid, thank you!
this is a really interesting video, I loved the story about being on call. I hope that you do more personalized "take away" videos like this, they're great.
Aside from the content of this video, which is incredibly valuable for me right now, I LOVE the design of the room you film in. The green accent wall with the white shelves and the plants, CHEFS KISS
Damn you have the same avatar as one of my friend :D
As someone who's worked in a call center, I can definitely relate to Dr. K's experience with being on call. I noticed that when I spent time between calls browsing social media, I felt resentful whenever I was forced away from it, and because of that, working actually felt miserable. But when I didn't have time between calls, or if I just allowed myself to be bored, working was a lot more pleasant.
And I can definitely second jotting down one's thoughts. After I began sketching a year ago, I've noticed that I've become a lot more naturally drawn towards being creative - whereas before, trying to do anything creative was incredibly hard. I'm still nowhere near the tipping point that Dr. K describes.
_I noticed that when I spent time between calls browsing social media, I felt resentful whenever I was forced away from it, and because of that, working actually felt miserable. But when I didn't have time between calls, or if I just allowed myself to be bored, working was a lot more pleasant._
🤦♂👏wow
that hit hard
thank you
Meanwhile I actually need breaks to not be miserable and can't stand it if I have to juggle multiple rush jobs (does not happen often, but when it does, vert stressful). My previous job had a big workload and unrealistic expectations of what a 4 man service desk can do within a big office that has upto 5000 employees. That stress og that clustercluck made me really toy with the idea of jumping off the bridge I was walking on everyday and that was only part of the reason I quit. The fact they did not pay me for 2 months did not help (got paid after plenty of threats, some of which I made good on by quitting).
I got zero tolerance on having my pay messed with.
This is a great middle piece between 'Is Progress in Gaming Destroying your Real Life' and 'Why Video Games Are Hard To Put Down' and 'Dr. K, how do I Focus?'. Your ideas actually hang together as a complete system to understand the self and rewrite our behavior in a holistic way. Literally the first self help guru who has helped me to help myself. Thanks for the continued work 👍📿📿📿
HEALTHY GAMER CINEMATIC UNIVERSE
Someone needs to put everything together and connect all the content.
@@Ropewatch Some already has made an unofficial Dr. K guide to studying
@@leonardodavinci4259 link?
I had a similar experience happen to me!! I work in an inpatient psychiatric and we can't use our cell phones on floor. I have ADHD and i need something to take notes with to remember everything. I found i started jolting down notes and ideas to help my patients in my notebook when i had free time. I also draw and color in it now too and i find its much much easier to pay attention while coloring then just staring down a hall. I find that I cannot stop writing ideas now even at home. I used to only care about video games, now all I want to do is to use my ideas to help my patients. I love my job now.
I'm a teacher with ADHD and I use my downtime to plan lessons and think about what I want to do throughout the week. It doesn't feel like "toxic productivity" to me because, as you know, you have to leverage your productivity when you can and I would rather use my spurts of creative freedom than squander it.
It seems like the editor finally chilled out a bit with this video. This video reminds me of the OG content when he was just chilling and talking to us. Love it! It's still pretty cut and pasted but it's not as jarring as previous videos so it feels more like I'm listening to a lecture rather than some other type of content
also want to add the little blue panes where it highlights the important points is W. it was very helpful cuz it motivated me to pause and analyze
The audio is quite fucked, though.
@@Eminent_wolf same. Visual summaries of key points really help me categorize the info in my brain.
it seems like you have great eye power!!
@@noyama9166 it's called Sharingan
I've been a competitive PC gamer for over a decade now, and many times I've found myself sitting for 12+ hours grinding Rust or League. I still casually return to those games sometimes but as Dr.K says at the very end of the video, once you reach a point where you actually become distracted FROM THE GAME because you have a handful of creative thoughts to pursue, things really do begin to swing in your favor. The smile at the end tells it all, and it's very satisfying to know that I can honestly say I've done the work and can now connect with that feeling he explains.
Even though I'm not where I want to be professionally, I've been on a great path for the last few years and can't wait to see what the future holds.
“apathy’s a tragedy and boredom is a crime, anything and everything all of the time”
-bo burnnam
Man I'm so glad I decided to watch this video while bored at work 🤣I'm a programmer and things can get very chaotic. But also a lot of the time there's not much to do and not a lot of pressure to do what little needs to be done (especially now that it's summer where I live, since most clients are on vacations), so I end up getting bored and watching TH-cam and procrastinating way too much. After watching this I unironically feel so motivated to just close YT and get everything done so I can have time to be productive in other stuff, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do now :) Thanks doc!
You sure that was his message? I thought it wasn’t about making time for productivity which is what I am currently understanding about your take away. I understood it as using small amounts of time to get in touch with your creativity and then to review your creative impulses and that in the long term (years even) would grow into true motivation to be productive rather than using willpower to force productivity. Let’s face it, we all know what productivity is but we fail at willing it in ourselves. To be more than a temporary situation we must have an internal motivation coming from our essential self and core values.
Programmer here with similar problem. I agree with the other responder, what you've described sounds to me like a burst of productivity, not the self-fueling cycle of creativity
Dude, i love you! I have never been a gamer, but I am ADD and a mother of 4 boys who are ADHD, ages 16, 29, 37 and 39.What I connect with is your train of thought, and wanting to help others around you. I connect with their friends and everyone I meet. My mind is always problem solving. I super appreciate your videos about people with diagnosis's. I realized my daughter in law is borderline, and you have helped me deal with that. Your interview with the guy planning the school shooting was amazing! That poor guy should have had help, God bless the cheer leader reaching out to him! He really touched on so many problems with our society. I hope you can reach more people to share your knowledge and promote psychiatric help. You are showing people therapy is not scary or judgmental. Thank you!
Hitting professional tipping point Makes you want to work. Attitude of wanting to be productive.
Now I started to enjoy the dopamine activity more.
So much momentum from the indrias, after playing game mind is filed with thoughts of wanting to be productive. Once you hit that point, life becomes easy.
Loved the cuts from the livestreams, but this new format of dedicated TH-cam lectures is SO GOOD
I am constantly in shock at how you're able to put form to thought considerations I have. I have been doing this completely unknowingly since I was 5 years old and the whole way through I was constantly discouraged from it (likely early ADHD showing its teeth since I'd focus too much on it, I'm diagnosed now!). It became my method of maintaining sanity at work, and my most successful jobs were ones that I could get away with it. I found I used to be in a loop of wanting to play games and then wanting to think of ideas, but lately I only ever want to play a game if for an idea! I thought I was broken but just this shift in perspective has enlightened me to how I've actually grown.
Thank you.
This guy is gem. His ideas, suggestions, and methods actually works not like others random people on the internet who talks so excessively but eventually come to no point that can actually practically work. I saw only a few videos but every time I saw he surprised me because he is most relatable guy and I can actually think much more creatively after watching such videos.
Randomly saw this on my feed and really needed to hear it. There are so many creative pursuits of mine that have sat still for years because I haven't committed that continued focus on them and have convinced myself I never have the energy for anything after a day's work than playing a game.
Instant subscribe. Thank you for sharing this insight!
This really resonates with some realizations I came too recently. Particularly that walking away from a game didn’t mean I was actually away - I’d be reading guides, discussing on Reddit, reading patch notes etc.
When I started to feel empty I couldn’t put my finger on why, until I started following impulses outside of gaming. I’ve started to look at some of those creative impulses and take action and it’s wild to see the life I am living now vs where I was even a year ago
Productivity used to intimidate me, I never could understand people who I viewed as always “on.” What could anyone get out of working so hard? I would think.
Wholeness, is what I’m finding.
Well it depends on what they mean with ""Productivity""
I hate that Word because where i grew up, being ""Productiv"" means working even more extra Hours at your Work for verry little Money.
You made me realize that I practiced this on my own yesterday before ever watching this video. It was Sunday and I kpet bouncing between games and youtube, not really enjoying any of it. I was about to jump back onto a game but I was hit with "do I really want to do that?" So I sat with that thought for a min and started doing things OFF SCREEN. Felt good :)
This is such a better way of looking at this. So much of my thinking around this was "if I don't get better at this, I'll die without ever doing anything worthwhile". It's so helpful to hear it framed as a "tipping point" - a point anyone can reach, after which harnessing your creative energy becomes easier.
Even as someone who is not a gamer this is so insightful and helpful!!
I'm so happy to have come across your channel because I had the idea that maybe I should step back a bit from video games and meanwhile, every time I'm driving I have room in my head, so I started making memos about creativity (I'm a musician) and the more I was doing it, the more it became pleasant.
I never made a relation between this activity and the video game addiction. I was on the right path, and I just needed someone to tell me, "You should do more of this until your video game addiction steps back naturally."
I'll watch all your videos and start building from there.
Thank you so much.
I needed this video like 3 years ago... well it's a good thing that i've watched it now then never. ty 4 the input.
best therapist ive encountered online, so good at explaining and being straight to the point
a few months ago I wouldn't have believed it but I am now going through this tipping point. It wasn't a conscious choice like yours, or I guess maybe it was just a little different; I was playing video games and smoking weed so much that eventually I built up a resistance to both and neither would "do it" for me anymore. I got so tired of being bored and procrastinating that the only thing left I hadn't done in a while was try. So I picked up a guitar and tried. I picked up a book and tried. Like you said it started slow but eventually those few seeds I was able to capture bore the fruit that is maintaining me right now. Now I'm back on track to finishing my career and reconnecting with the people that matter to me. And becoming once again a person who will matter to others. You describe it so well and sometimes I feel bad for looking at some of these videos or outside sources instead of refining these sentiments and thoughts on my own into their own unique shape but then I remember that that option never really goes away. The way I described it initially was that I finally got bored of being bored, and leaned into it. Glad to see how far the channel has come and that you are still keeping it true to the core. Much love
I’m happy for healthy gamer for taking sponsorships and growing their business so that they can help more people ❤❤
For me, this is the best educational channel on TH-cam hands down. There I see the discussion of real problems that I have and see concrete advice to follow, divided into steps, even. Thank you for this!
This explains everything! I always tell my friend "the hardest part is starting." Once I do I can do it for hours and lose myself doing it.
This is a very detailed look at the "sharpen the saw" concept from the book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People".👍👍
Your personal story of being On-Call hits me hard as an HVAC repairman who likes creative writing and just did 15 hours in one day lol
This helps me understand my most creative and fulfilling time in my life, and the deep depression that followed. I think I self sabotaged myself so bad when covid lockdown hit, that I neglected and killed the 'grove', which turned it from a source of rich stimulating self-amplifying fruits, to a dark pit of rotting compost that I drowned in.
Ty DrK , after playing 1h30mins of WoW after not playing videogames for 2 months I felt a huge pike in stress and also a big dopamine drop,
And then a bigger dopamine drop because it made me think that I will probably not play videogames anymore.
So hearing that you can find balance while being productive gives me hope.
Ty DrK
I'm at the most difficult point in my life in terms of video game (and various other) addictions, lack of motivation and willpower, and it's really ruining my life. I haven't worked or left the house since covid. Luckily the RNG GODS imparted a gift upon me and my graphics card crapped out during yesterday's gaming binge and I won't be buying another PC until I turn myself around.
I found your channel this morning and I can't get enough. In a single day i've learned how my mind works, how to appreciate meditation and utilize boredom to my benefit, how to shape the environment around me to set myself up for success, how emotions and imposter syndrome are shitting on my parade, and how to reset my dopamine system.
Thank you for helping me reach my professional tipping point RIGHT NOW and turning my life around.
Absolutely proud of you for taking that leap! I can tell you for a fact that it’s incredibly easy to become addicted to video games when you’ve got nothing going on. It’ll be tough, but ultimately you’ll chase more creative endeavours. I myself have gave my ps4/ps3 away for 30 days, or at least until I’ve turned my life around. I think the key to having a healthy relationship with games is to have enough fulfilment in your life so that you don’t rely on games for your dopamine hit.
Been addicted to Old school runescape. I’ve logged 108 days of play time since Nov 2018. Im so happy I came across this channel - it’s really making me notice key things I need to work as someone with ADHD. I don’t want to be addicted to weed and video games anymore.
How are things with you now? Do you play games anymore?
Honestly, the things your describing are what have started happening to me. I have a lot of shame and Ive opened up to my family. Ive always wanted to make a comic book and once i started chasing that, realizations about how i see myself came to light, all the Dr. K, philosophy, and experiences finally clicked into place and im getting astronomically better for my own sake. It is really bizzare 😂
I love how detailed your awareness and communication is of your psychological processes, behaviour, and how their interactions contribute to this critical type of development! I think this is very insightful and uniquely encouraging because of how relatable the details are in terms of the experience.
Thanks man - your videos make so much sense to me and have been more helpful to me than all the others I've seen all put together. Your content has made a huge impact on my life. I'm 47 and struggled my whole life to come to terms with myself, and it feels like I finally have the tools to start climbing that hill. Short story - I've been wanting to get back into learning Python programming and tinkering with microelectronics for almost 2 years now. Yet every time I sit in front of my PC I rather try to find entertainment in one of my many games. I stopped having fun playing games a few months back and have become aware I need to give it a break. Your video motivated me to swap PC's with my son - I set up the flashy Windows gaming desktop for him, and set up his small form factor repurposed office PC with Linux, dev tools and ebook reader for myself. He's having fun exploring the world of PC gaming - I'm lucky that he leans towards what I call "learning and fun" (games like Spore, Minecraft, etc) so I don't have to babysit him too much. And I'm having fun learning Linux and have less distractions from more constructive pursuits when I sit at my PC. Everybody wins and not a cent spent.
This video is the single most valuable video on the entire platform. I am so glad I found this channel.
Thank you, Dr. K and Team for creating these videos and making this information so freely accessible. Keep up the good work 🙏🙏
That idea of "riding my boredom" is exactly what I need the most right now. I often find myself wanting to do things that I care about but then certain thoughts start to arise and I reasolve to my impulses like some primitive caveman. I'll try that out and see how it works for me!
This is really profound for me. Ive had this same idea even though ive not thougt about it in such a holistic way and this video really made it click for me. I'm currently trying to reduce my amount of distraction with entertainment as ive started with ADHD medication at the age of 30. Ive built up so many bad habits during my life and it's very hard to break them, but i finally feel able to do it due to the meds. As a musician ive always had tons of little ideas that i record on my phone (like journaling) but i just leave them there. Ive had a lot of anxiety about that which has just magnified the problem but i never thought about going back to just reflect on those ideas as a way to cultivate my creativity.
This video spoke to me soooo much. I have had a lot of “boring time” at work, and eventually even TH-cam/podcasts became boring, and my brain started to explore creative outlets more. Which is more exciting and rewarding to me, and even if I couldn’t work on it at work I would write down every thought I had about it.
I love this. I'm not a gamer but I do have a weed addiction/habit that meant daily use for many years. People like to generalise with drug use that it's down to past traumas, but I honestly think it's down to boredom. My mind is so used to being entertained/high in the evenings that when I don't have that stimulus it freaks out. I've been managing it over the past few months and my life is way better without it. Really good tips on harnessing your creative ideas as well. Thanks as always Doc 🙏🏽
I had to decide that I was in a codependent, abusive relationship with gaming developers who demanded I ignore their deliberate gaslighting to manipulate my behavior into time-sucking labor.
The game, if it was based on factual ability stats, transparent matchmaking and true freedom of association/disassociation - was not inherently addictive.
What’s “addictive” is forcing players into a codependent whirlpool of algorithmic gaslighting where they lust for fair validation, constantly encounter unfair rejection, and are denied meaningful proportional data about their part in the product’s worldwide metrics.
Im sorry that happened to you tay. ❤️
"Fair" matchmaking was deemed as "less than optimal" as it does a poor job at keeping people playing. What they do instead is a game of roulette, where the difficulty is curated by strategically facing stronger opponents against weaker opponents. It does 2 things. It gives the stronger player validation that they are a good player, they got their payoff. For the weaker player, it angers them, which ironically increases engagement. They were denied their dopamine hit. They must play another match for it. And when it happens again, they must play another match for it.
Basically, instead of using matchmaking to make fairer games, the most popular games use it to make less fair games. Where matchmaking actually is plotting against you, as negative emotions are more likely to keep you playing.
Barely understood what you wrote there but…chocolate rain?
@@franciscogolden1 🤣🤣🤣
What game did you play?😅
ive been gaming like a loser for almost 30 years, not so sure my drive for productivity exists anymore but you are soooo right
Your mic sounds like Psychomantis from metal gear solid lol
Healthy Gamer best thing to happen, Dr K with another great vid.
My thought process has changed so much, all thanks to you. Unfortunately, personally for me, two years of psychiatrist appointments, medicine and weekly therapist haven't helped as much. Discovering your channel was validating and truly eye-opening. Thank you so much!
This is *the* subject that speaks directly to me, and I don't even play video games, I watch TH-cam. For years now I've been dumbfounded and immensely annoyed by the fact that the thing I enjoy most is being productive/getting concrete things done, but most of the time I just can't get myself to do anything aside just wasting time and feeling miserable for having thrown the whole day to the trash with nothing to show for it (*both* during the activity and after). It seems like such an obvious paradox: door A has "AVOID, this mostly feels bad and always makes you feel bad after" written on it, but it's what open most of the time instead of door B that says "You should pick this one since you always have had fun doing it, and you always feel good for having done it.".
It feels so obviously wrong, but it's how my mind functions most of the time for some reason.
This is great. Just recently I realized "I'm really good at procrastinating, so maybe I should use that to my advantage." When I have an impulse to do something because I'm bored that's not productive I try to at least think "ok let's at least brush my teeth and take the trash out"
And sometimes that gets me on a dopamine train of accomplishing shit unless I'm just really truly exhausted. Then next thing know I spent an hour cleaning and just letting my mind wander and by the time I'm done I no longer want to drink or game I prolly want to build legos or work in my garden.
Something I have learned regarding dealing with creativity and boredom (11:54) is how to “double reward” my creativity. For example (I’m an artist) when I get an idea of something to draw, my first impulse is to turn on a video to listen to because that’s half the fun of art for me, but instead I’ll make myself work and develop my idea for 15-30 minutes to which greatly increases my creativity and when I’ve fully mapped everything out I’ll turn on a video
I just wanted to be good at something and figured it would be easier to get good at games since I enjoy them more. But I am too bad at games for that. But even when I didn't play video games for 4 months, I had no motivation to do anything. I think life itself just wears me out and I am constantly burnt out and have no option but to keep on going. I just want to sit in my room all day and never leave.
This video is so underrated. I think it's one of the best and one of the most important video that I really needed to watch. Thank you for that!
Thank you for this video! This makes me want to act, starting with reflecting on my actions and looking at what my peers are doing critically
Wow. This feels like me and overwatch lately. Holy… even the ranking / elo was spot on.
I can understand this. I found a creative outlet and instead of wanting to just go home and play games, I find myself wanting to work on that creative outlet more than actually playing games while I am bored.
I think I can confidently say that I've overcome game addiction but I am struggling with internet addiction. It's the addiction that I seem to have a deep attachment to and live on autopilot everyday to feed it. I feel like I've neared my professional tipping point so many times but never ventured past the tip.
One of the things i really have to work on is not being scared of being bored. I have gotten to the point where i get anxious when i let my thoughts roam freely. So if i do get bored i always try to fill the gap to prevent this anxious feeling. I think it is gonna take a lot of work but knowing that i shouldnt be scared of it might help me reduce the anxiousness a little
I used to feel like this a lot. For me, it was depression-related; I used to think a lot of super dark thoughts. Some things that helped me were figuring out why I was afraid of thinking those thoughts, learning how to untangle myself from them (and see them more as just thoughts), and getting treatment for depression. The "white noise" of random thoughts became a lot more tolerable/manageable.
@@Avreon-y7v Thank you ill keep that in mind
Thank you so much for this! This is something I really needed because I've been struggling with feeding my boredom that I've lost so much productive energy. This is the direction I want to head towards :)
this video is actually so helpful. The advice about paying attention to your creative impulses is so true. I do this with music and I never even realized it. The nice thing about investing more into your creative impulses is that you actually get satisfaction out of it. I mindlessly play video games all day and feel dissatisfaction or nothing at all, but just spending half an hour writing feels so satisfying, and I can even look back on what I did and feel the same way.
Howd you capture your creative impulses with music?
i spent 4 years just playing games and 0 things productive at least now im looking for a job and studying
I understand this, but I struggle with it as well.
I used to work at a gas station. I captured my creative impulses by writing in the morning hours when no one was at the pump. I got my first book finished this way. I've finished 3 books thus far.
I haven't stopped the train per se; I still create (I've channeled it into other pursuits as well). But I don't see my writing as productive. I don't get the feedback I need to pursue them. I don't worry about the creativity, I get discouraged by the lack of feedback (even if the feedback I get is encouraging) or just the ability to implement my ideas. Example: I have three books, have tried for years to get them published, eventually gave up because I couldn't keep doing that with my dwindling free time.
I struggle because these pursuits haven't borne professional/societal fruit. They've definitely been personally helpful, but they haven't had the impact or spread that I think they should have.
Have you given a look at self-publishing?
@@VioletEmerald yeah, I self-published my second one actually. Years back (almost 10 years ago) on Amazon when that was really gaining steam. I've sold about 200 copies total. And that was my cringe book X) ie one that you'd expect a newbie writer with decent word craft but no experience to make. I gave it the works too, went to writing conferences to get feedback (and got good feedback from published/well known authors) etc.
The next book took almost 9 years to finish, because I went through college and a lot of really shitty life events. I'm proud of it, but it's really not something that's self-publishable. I'd need a lot of help to get it to the audience that would really benefit from it. I'd also need a very good sensitivity reader. It would need a pretty epic rewrite that really just needs professional eyes to guide it and get it done in a reasonable timeframe.
Navigating that world has never been easy, but self publishing really killed the approach where you could network with a publisher to submit a good complete draft. Traditional publishing pretty much now requires you to already have an audience (it's guaranteed money), and I don't have the money or time to pursue that or the editing/etc services I'd need to compete. Takes away from writing and other goals. I'm sure there are good audiences and pockets where I could find a niche, but I'd need someone to take a risk on me, and no one has. I'm just...tired of having to work on the parts I have no control over.
I've also reached out to various writer groups over the years. I'm part of a local artist group where I share things on occasion. It's great and I've continued my craft as a result, but it's never really led where I've wanted it to.
Dr. K's videos on desires vs values have helped a lot with all of this, as has a lot of therapy regarding my own self worth (the whole pursuit left me feeling worthless), so I'm in a decent place mentally FYI. Got diagnosed with ADHD 3 years ago and my life has turned around a lot.
Mostly I'm just frustrated that a lot of the things I pursue don't take off, and tired of the persistence play when I have the rest of my life I need to live.
Thank you for this
This year I started my professional life after graduating from university, and it has been a constant learning about my own discipline.
Although everything has turned out well so far, it has not been easy and every day I have been able to learn more about myself professionally.
Awesome content man! I have learned much from you over the last few years but I feel this one may be the best yet! Thank you.
@8:45 I relate a lot. When I was using a white board daily, it helped me wake up and have a display with ideas of things to do or what needs to get done. And while reading those things it would remind me of other things. And then I got extra dopamine by being able to wipe off the task or check it off when I finished.
I did actually feel this in regards to checking my phone and stuff at work i.e. not doing it make work more pleasant. Can't relate to capturing creative thoughts though. Upon reflection, I always just cross out my "creative" ideas as trash because they are.
Must be nice to have a job that actually enables creativity to some degree. Nothing in my field needs creativity nor productivity for all that matters, and sure as hell it does not have any "dead time". The shift is a full on throttle from start to finish. There would be no reason for me to actually endure boredom when I'm not working and I don't have to do something else, hence why I started playing videogames. Good insight though, it's always so interesting to hear other's experiences.
It’s incredible that every new video you produce is a gift!
Interesting approach to battling addiction. I did this thing called growing up and got a job which immediately broke my gaming habit.
Great video as always! One thing I'd like to add from another Dr. K video I saw is for people with low conscientiousness (trait of motivation) to not think they've achieved some type of motivated state whenever they get to the point Dr. K described where you can play a game and it seemingly having no impact on your productivity. In that video he talks about utilizing a hypothetical bank of motivation where some activities withdraw from your motivation bank and others deposit into it (gaming would for instance require a withdrawal), and that it is important to realize how if this is your method of motivation, i.e. you don't have a trait to constantly motivate you, then you will never achieve some type of immunity from falling back into the hole you've just climbed out of, it gets a hell of a lot easier to maintain that state of motivation, but I say this as some one who has let himself believe that I was finally out and experienced this kind of gaming where it doesn't seemingly affect you, but slowly and surely the frequency of games ramp up and all of a sudden I was back in the degenerate addict lifestyle where I started, all because I thought I was finally out for good.
This may sound incredibly negative but like I said, when you're out it's so easy to keep yourself motivated, all you have to do is realize that there's always a risk and warnings will start to pop up in your head whenever you're slipping a bit. I'm currently doing great with a post-it note on my bathroom mirror that reads "Once an addict, always an addict" as a reminder. Best of luck!
dr k, apko hazar topon ki salami. sada khush rahein aap.
Love the concept of procrastinating on your vices. I do this sometimes. Also when life gets hard I tell myself that the only good thing to procrastinate on is quitting.
Had to go basically homeless to cure my addiction, I use to put my whole being into gaming , didn’t matter the game , but I was running from myself. I turn 30 in April and I know I need to reprogram myself if I want to live a fulfilling life. They tell me it’s not real , Gaming has nothing to do with real life…All in All , I don’t wanna bother anyone, or hurt anyone physically or verbally. I just want to stop wasting my time on what everyone thinks of me , and find confidence in myself… Godspeed Y’all
This video is massive. Thank you for taking the time to make this, Dr. K. I'm going to try and incorporate some of this into my life.
Thank you for all your videos, it feels like you understand a lot, most people just don't know yet
One of my fave HG videos. Took notes on the three steps and Indriya. Really have to sirround yourself with things that you want to do more of. Definitely will not be pulling out my shows next time im on the plane. Riding out boredom instead.
Really lost touch with creative impulses after getting a corporate job. Need to get back into it!
The value of this vid is absolutely incredible
Your channel has changed my life, thank you, your videos keep getting better
Great point! But sometimes games, movies etc are not only good for me but necessary. It feeds my cultural emotional tank of ideas, thoughts, atmospheres etc. Videogames literally saved my soul (alongside with music) in my teens and many of my world views and tastes are defined by such games as Gothic, Morrowind, HOMM3, Evil Islands, Unreal Tournament '99 etc.
I consist of it at this point. And I'm not playing anymore for decade or two... almost don't watch movies, only music is as important for me as ever. And it's sad. I mean, yes, I started to read more as a substitution, but it's not enough. Sometimes I make myself watch or play something and my life literally become more soulful, emotional, happy and motivated.
Games, movies and books deprivation leads to "growing up" - you become that old grumpy empty shell, never ever let yourself sink as low as being "grown up" in this meaning. Always be wide-eyed, happy and eager for life. Hardly it's possible without cultural emotional food.
this super helpful to me, I am dealing with some kind of identity crisis after i stop playing video game for like 1 week. What you just said is kinda happened to me, I survived the boredom and now my mind is kinda thinking about something that I have to do. Our brain is so interesting.
I started doing this without realising it when I decided to create content for my TH-cam channel. Even though it isn't much, I'm happy with my work and am always thinking making more. Somehow, even after a month, I still feel the need to keep going.
Dr GG making me a better human and gamer all on the same lecture. I’ll be back same time tomorrow
Thank you for this video. After watching I put my phone down and loaded the dishwasher and then spent an hour and a half cleaning out my closet. I had the urge to pick up my phone several times but it really didn’t take much effort to resist and just go back to what I was doing.
This video is so funny to me. Your help (videos and Dr. K's guide) got me to the professional tipping point in my work as an attorney over the course of the last year. And I just saw this video for the first time tonight!
And I beat my videogame addiction with your help - before I saw this video! HAH! You rock.
This video from an ideology perspective speaks to why I like fighting games so much. A lot of habits like watching replays and reflecting have been great tools to carry into the workforce for me. It's a big contributor to my success.
It came to me (thankfully) after having my daughter. If I'm not taking care of her I'm cleaning up or working out, or doing something else productive. I still miss gaming but I can't even bring myself to even watch gameplay a lot of the time because I know the urge will just go unfulfilled.
I'm a lot more engaged at work now because I see it as an extension of taking care of her. At lunchtime I used to watch league videos to decompress from the work. Now I use that time to do 30 minute meditations. I sometimes get upset I never got to this point earlier, but I know it's partly just my PFC reaching full maturity (turning 30 soon).
Just what I needed. Thanks!
OK Dr K… you can officially call yourself mindreader now. Just out of this world how you address people's problems just in time. 👏
Hey Dr.K! Really love this video as a writer/creative this is really reassuring and something I've slowly been discovering myself so, hearing you put it into words helps! I do have a question though. Sometimes I get the "creative impulses" but stop myself from capturing them. I'm not absolutely sure why this happens because I really do want to be productive - I think I get stuck in not knowing how to properly capture my ideas in a way that they can be useful later on without there being a huge learning curve that distracts from the actual creative process. To give an analogy it's like if I had a story I wanted to animate but then I have to spend more time learning how to use animation software instead of actually creating the story but if I don't learn the software it's hard to turn my ideas into something valuable and useful and so, I feel like my creativity isn't productive and avoid doing it all together. Essentially how do you turn writing or ideas in general into a bigger project and not feel like you're just in the void doing things with no idea how it could become anything?
I think you may be overwhelming yourself with the idea of a perfect outcome / finished product, which is impossible. It's strange that you separate the "learning curve" from the creative process because you actually learn from pursuing that creative idea. Sure, you can task yourself with the goal of learning the entirety of a software before using it. But doesn't it make more sense to learn it as you need to use it? For any creative pursuit, you ought to have fun with it, fail as much as you possibly can, and learn from that.
If you really want to make something of your ideas the unfortunate reality is that you need to learn the tools for it sooner or later. There's no way around it.
At first it'll be frustrating and you really won't get the results you want, especially if you work on something you're passionate about instead of something that's deliberate practice, but it's a necessary part of the process.
Also, if you need to prepare yourself that not everything about the making the idea come to life will be part of that passionate creative process. Animation especially, as it takes so much effort for small results. But if you don't let that scare you you really can end up making amazing stuff and feel so much satisfaction about making *your own* ideas.
Going to apply this to boost my daily drawing sessions, feel like it's going to work.
Now i only need something to do boost my mood when i feel awful about t the outcome of my hours.
I often feel a sense of FOMO when I barely am able to keep in touch with old raid members who have moved onto the next group raids and run out of things to say that we mutually can speak about since the game is no longer a common experience for us. It is tempting to jump back in and experience the hype and work towards a goal as a team to experience together. But I know that I was playing that game in my lowest moments, when my career was going nowhere and I didn't have any luck in my personal life. In a way I knew that gaming was not making it any better, and that online friendships while genuine, cannot substitute for the same real life goal oriented friends I needed to surround myself with to help manifest my intrinsic motivation. The social aspect of video games is truly a double edged sword.
I got lucky that things changed within my game group and people had different expectations moving forward (TL;DR: some people wanted to push for more hours to clear faster, others were older and wanted to chill with the goal of clearing eventually), and I got an opportunity to bridge into my career choice down the line that busied myself immensely to prevent me from committing to spending time on Discord or a game. I'm in a sweet spot now where I'm back on track for my career (better late than never!) and at my work place we have a group of 'gamer girls' whom all of us play games very much SECONDARY to our careers and personal relationships. We don't even play the same games or we all play single player games. Surrounding myself with these like-minded people whom I can keep my game-addict levels minimal with that external validation, helps keep me on track for my internal values. Keeping myself busy with other things and hobbies (I picked up a lot of crafting and food hobbies to share with people IRL with TANGIBLE, LASTING products attained) keeps me from tumbling down the endless game cycle addict wheel.
There are still days I game for 14+ hours in a row. But those days are for when I know that everything else in my life is squared away and it is on MY schedule without feeling pressure to game. Sitting down to game without those other things in my life taken care of feels so uncomfortable now, it's distracting me from getting into the game because of this natural hierarchy of To Do's that has been ingrained into me by habit by now. I really like this balance and I'm so happy to hear it validated on this video!
A fantastic video, Dr. K. I would like to add that, even when you are having fun with dopaminergic activities you still are productive after getting over that tipping point. You are more able to connect important ideas and integrate them into the play, making it a incredible opportunity for social learning of everyone involved.
As someone who's been watching these videos for over a year Dr K's mentioned this a ton and I'm sure I'll never keep this up as a routine beyond just 2 weeks
We always talk about having a Goal and becoming something, but what if i just do not want to have a Goal or any meaning in Life, i just want to be left alone and enjoy myself doing stuff i like doing?
I do enjoy playing Videogames very much, i also have Interests in some stuff, but i never actually start doing them, cause they need effort and i hate to make effort.
Videogames are also something, i definitly do not want to be gone in my Life, i just get too much joy out of them, but i do not get Joy of almost anything else.
Sure i like being out with Friends sometimes, but then i am again just too Introverted so i cut off my Friends after 2 Weeks for the next Years until i feel lonley again.
I am pretty much happy with my Life, i know i could do more and better things, but i also don't really want to do those things.
Not sure if i am just weird, but i actually don't care about being a better Version of myself, i just want to be left alone in piece xD.
I also think i am not addicted, cause if i have stuff to do, to have my Games ect. still in my Life i actually do them first, before playing and also don't really miss Games, if i do stuff that make me not being able to play Games for Weeks or even Months.
Idk if my English even make Sense, but idk i really don't enjoy the Idea of giving up Games, who tf wants to play Games 30min a Week or Day, lol.
Maybe this Video is also not made for me, but i get a little Angry, if it is about stop playing Games xD.
17:38 Idk man, all this sounds weird to me. Maybe i am just a Neet.
I've already drastically changed my productivity since seeing this video. I just chill, maybe read a book, walk, or listen to ambience when I don't have impulses
For me this is more about TH-cam/twitch addiction. Super helpful video
Thanks Dr. K!