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Are there controlled studies on this? And how about TH-cam, Netflix binging, and sleep deprivation? After exams I’d always be insanely sleep deprived and depressed. Probably not much learning going on.
When you mentioned that with games we "stop learning", does it apply to games with any level of difficulty? Because one of the characteristics of hard games, whether the difficulty comes from how the devs made the game or playing VS a real person that is better than me, it often forces me to analyze my mistakes, learn from them and create new tactics and/or strategies. Btw, I'm learning to program and I got the part about dividing tasks, that's a crucial part of coding and have to do that again and again.
I dont think thats something he would say given the channel name. But yeah feels good & it improves our trust in him (not triggering our subconscious-ego-self-defenses lol)
@@flk2441 Dr. K is still playing games himself, so :o And gaming is not inherently bad (and way better than watching TV all day, esp. if one also moves around if that's possible with/during the game).
Yeah... I've had a traumatising childhood which consisted having no good friends, ignorant strictive parents, abusive teachers. Games have given me an escape from the dark reality and they were just so fun... For a long while, until i was 18. Now I'm 21 and i stopped playing but i still feel that debuff on my brain
My parents literally just spoonfed me videogames and told me to go play and leave them alone. They had no energy or patience after both working 10+ hours a day. And I lived somewhere with no friends conveniently (or safely) nearby. And during a time when being a gamer and otaku was something to be ashamed of and kept hidden. All of which groomed me from a young age to self-isolate and play video games. And as someone with adhd (non-hyper just executive dysfunction), autism (high-functioning), and depression. Video games are just comfortable and familiar. It sucks.
Right because as a species we all function in the same way but psychology has its weaknesses too because everyone’s brain runs on it’s own path meaning it would be almost quite inaccurate for lots of other people especially the neurologically divergent. There’s probably a ton of mental illnesses and disorders that remain undiscovered due to this same reason
I am a daily gamer in my mid-50s now. Excelled in the Marine Corps. My memory and ability to adapt to things quickly could have been aided by some of the mind games I played. I had zero problems in the outside world. It needs done, I get up, get it done, and game once all the important things are done. Gaming is like a treat.
Listening to what he said in the video didn't make sense to me. I too served 8 years in the corps, was a gamer before, during, and after. I have a family, two beautiful intelligent daughters, and am only 32. I question his sources and statistics credibility. I know plenty of gamers who live fulfilled lives. Perhaps he's talking about the new generations. This I can understand because they've grown up on a screen.
I don't think he's talking about all gamers. In fact, I think he's talking about a niche of gamers. People who play A LOT of hours daily. Trust me, the people who he's talking to knows who they are. Most likely people who are not fulfilled at their jobs (or unemployed, or studying) and don't have children. Not necessarily younger gens, but definitely increased in younger gens.@@TheMadRooster09
I have been playing games since the late 70s. Even before we had computer games I would create fantasy games out of clay with my brother. The games were so complex we had a random generation for monsters and items which was a list over 300 where each item or monster ranged from level 1 thru level 8 or the very rare level 9. We eventually switched to computer games and we play a variety of computer games even today. So after 45 years I am a senior software engineer at a fortune 100 company earning almost three times as much as the combined income of the average family. Where would I be today without computer games?? probably one of those fellas in an average family.
I think he’s not saying “All gamers will experience this and feel this way” He makes several remarks throughout the video such as “if you feel this way then…” So I believe he is addressing a common occurrence he has seen in his professional experience (as well as his own life) he is not necessarily saying everyone who games struggles with these issues, but If you DO, then here’s some info to help
There was a time when video games no longer made me feel good, the spark and hype was gone and my productive life suffered. I started to only play on weekends, like a video game fast and wow man, working hard and then relaxing on weekend afternoons playing Tears of the Kingdom feels glorious and productivity went up too.
I took the same concept with Weed. Weed always feels better to smoke on a weekend especially after a long week of work. Having to do it everyday starts to mess me up at work and my social life
@@Grandmaster_Vic I'm trying to quit rn, I'm currently 22 and I've been going overboard with edibles for a year or two. It's just been a depressive downwards spiral that nobody around me seems to get. So I want to quit and kill off that part of myself so I don't regress. No telling how jacked up it's made my brain.
@@Foogi9000 you needa figure out where the addiction comes from. Like it could be something lacking your life that you tryna fill a void for. I do recommend seeing a therapist or do some deep soul searching to help you figure it out
@@Therealbigsaya there was a time where I would smoke 2 to 4 joints a day. It was a bad period in my life. Once things were turning I find myself not doing it as much
For me it worked the opposite way. I had social anxiety and depression all my life and procrastinated a lot. I was a gamer in my teens and then gave up. Just a few years ago I picked up that hobby again and the games inspired me to change my life. I mostly play RPG's and i thought man, i want to be strong and brave as that characters and look cool as them. I actively search for a therapist, I found a job, have more money now, started to reach out to my friends again and go to gaming conventions to meet new people. Also I started to workout, got a new haircut and overall I am happier. Every day I first do all my tasks from my todo list and do something for my personal growth and the reward in the end is gaming.
+griffith Yes! That's the way to do it! Particularly getting your chores or things to do, done early! I'm trying to do this myself. I don't always succeed though!
Yeah games kept me out of trouble I use it for patience you don't always have the money to do what you want playing a game buys time till you can afford to do something, I also use it to think while I'm playing a game that some people consider boring it gives me time to think about the problems of the day and figure out something better the next day!
I've been a gamer for over a decade, and before I clicked on the video, I was puzzled by the title. To my surprise, it accurately described my life: subconsciously playing games while ignoring negative emotions, struggling to break down large tasks from real life into smaller ones and complete them, and experiencing stagnation in life's progress. I deeply appreciate the perspectives the author has provided, the issues pointed out, and the advice given.
It depends. Gaming just like alcohol can be used by people in bad situations as a way to distract themselves from their life, only for it to become too much of a distraction and take over their life. It's all about self-control. Games making you unable to turn large tasks into smaller ones might be a side effect of gaming taking so much time from your daily life that any skills the game doesn't "teaches" you (like turning large tasks into smaller ones, as well as a crap ton of social skills) you start to regress on. I don't want to sound like a devil's advocate, but some soulslike games actually help you learn how to turn large tasks into smaller ones, but then again they don't teach you other skills, so gaming of course should be controlled.
@@PraveenSrJ01 Alzheimer's patients are being told to play video games, memory games, and other brain games since it has an impressive impact on memory and cognition. I've been playing video games every month since the age of 10... usually for multiple hours each day. So how has 40 years of playing video games impacted my life? Well today I'm a Senior Software Engineer earning big bucks, no health problems with a hot girlfriend for the last 10 years who earns even more money. I never could have started working at Microsoft if games did not inspire me to build my own personal computer providing me the first stepping stone into computers. If you're someone who spends hours watching television each day or movies each weekend then you're doing less than someone playing video games each day. If you don't waste time watching television or watching movies then you're on a healthy path.
But compartmentalizing is what so many games do. They don't just give you everything the game has to offer at hour 1. You get them slowly over time. If anything, games really help you break down tasks to get you toward that end goal. So, I don't really understand how games specifically hindered that ability. I guess it also depends on what kind of games you play, your personality, learning aptitude etc. Blaming it all on videogames doesn't seem quite right.
This video hit me like a thunderstruck. I’m an addict gamer since my 14 years old (addict cause that’s all I do in my free time, I’m was easily above 20k hours of playing game). Since I was 21 old I realized that gaming was not a good thing for me: “What I have gotten from the past 7 years? next to nothing… My life didn’t change that much, I have no friends, almost no memory of all the games I have played, no one to shares the memory of the games that I remember, no job, no qualification, no lover…“ I realize that all I have done in the past years was just escape my life... And I didn’t want that…. Now I’m 26 old it’s been 5 years that I want to quit gaming but couldn’t do it completely. I completly stopped playing my favorite game since 5 years but it wasn’t enough. I bounced from one addiction to another… Gaming then Facebook then TH-cam, then gaming again… I managed to restrict a little bit of those urges and gain some time to do other things like swimming, reading or cooking… But I still feel the urged to play / watching youtube time to time... I still feel the need, from time to time, to divert my thought with something and not feel anxious with my life. But why? Why isn’t reading / cooking / swimming / meditate enough for me? Why I NEED GAMING in my life to not feel bad? And this guy just answer casually at this question. 19:50 “where is the exclamation point?” “what SHOULD I do?” F*ck me. For the first time in my life I realize that all my life I never asked myself “what I want to do?” but always “what SHOULD I do?”. The world give me anxiety for this exact reason. Nobody tell me what to do so I’m scared of picking the wrong choice, having "the bad ending". I’m scare to pick any answer because I think about what people expect of me. But people don’t tell me what to do… they don't care. So I’m lost… I’m like the soldier that have missed his squad and is now all alone on the battlefield. “What SHOULD I do? WHO I am supposed to listen?” On gaming like on a battlefield you learn so hard to listen to someone else that you begin to fear to think by yourself! You became addict to the authority and you seek someone to tell you what to do! And when you are all by yourself you start to panic. Wow, what a revelation! But now I was wondering how to manage my emotions… And Boom! You hit me again with your wisdom dr K. 21:11 “just break your problem into 2… again and again” This sentence had the effect off a thunderstruck for me…. “All the solution of all my problem can be found that easely… why I was worry at the first place?” At this exact moment and for the first time in my life all the voice in my head stopped talking. It’s like all my anxiety was gone. All my problems, that I could barely manage emotionally 20 minutes ago felled now so easy, I was not worry about them anymore. It’s like for the first time in my life since my 12 years old I was back again in the present. It’s like I just was seeing my bedroom, my head and hearing my voice for the first time. It’s like I was not anymore a NPC watching the movie of his life waiting to receive the player… I was the player! This sensation continue to follow me from this day, and I feel like now I don’t need to play anymore because I can now live with myself. Thank you dr K. You freed me from my head, now I feel I'm back in control and I will make sure to stay that way. THANK YOU SO MUCH!
I'm 21 now and I'm at the same point you're at. I actually clicked on this video because I've been having a lot of panic attacks lately but I've gone through what you have as well. I started playing at 5 years old and it's been constant bouncing from addiction to addiction when I quit playing video games. I'm so happy I found this video, I hope you're doing well dude
So what you're saying is, you have anxiety, you practiced escapism for most of your life and then you blamed videogames? Yeha I don't think gaming is the problem here, the problem is that you're too anxious to do anything, and the solution for that, is to grow a pair and throw yourself out there. It'll go bad, it'll go well, but trust me that 90% of the times you'll barely be in control of it
@yasininn76 Wanting to change is difficult when you dont know what you want. I was already aware that, somehow, the problem with my addiction came from me. I just could'nt undestand why I could'nt stop. This video helped me realise 4 things: 1) My anxiety come from the fact I was not feeling in control over my life (thinking "what SOULD I do?" instead of "what CAN I do?" / "what I want to do?") 2) Video game are so addicting to me cause they tell me exactly what I should do to win, they help me divert my thought from my self 3) By the way I use it, vidéo games make me use to think less and less by and for myself causing me to having less and less control over my life then increasing the urge to escape from it and the need of someone (/something) to guide me. 4) The feeling that I was not in control over my life and that someone sould tell me what to do in order to improve IS A LIE, in fact I'm as capable as anybody to think by myself for a good solution to a problem. In fact i'm the only one capable of knowing what I want. What Dr k helped me to do is for the first time vocalize thos feeling and undestand where their coming from. Now I undestand the cycle. Now I know if I dont change, nothing will change, and I will be "dead" all my life (ex : "The dark sad life of boogie2988") Now I know my problem is how I'm seeing myself and the world arround me. Now I know it's not an end in itself, I'm as capable as anybody to change. NOW I WANT to change, because I KNOW I CAN do it.... and that's what I needed. Everybody is different
Yeah, I'm still studying informatics but works pretty good so far. And if I don't know how to break down big tasks I just google it up or watch some videos and voilà. It's really funny how even being a fun person can be learned nowadays
@@mirrorcube3709 Congrats for finding out! Most people have no idea what it really means, and it's being used against them. One lesson at a time, step by step, progress is progress. Good-enough is good enough.
The best thing about this episode is, he knows what it feels like to be a gamer. He can even use words that gamers use to explain things. It's freaking amazing.
Of course. I hate it when people just tell you "just stop" to end all your problems, while this guy simplifies it to the point where you can watch paint dry and your problems go away.
@@ProjctAce331 from what I understand, it’s usually in ability based games like overwatch or that final fantasy mmo where you have a bunch of abilities which get put on a cool down when used. The dps rotation is you using each of your abilities in a sequence. Obviously, then, optimizing the dps rotation is when you find the best sequence of abilities to maximize damage.
The realization popped into my head like midway. What he’s essentially saying is to learn how to fail. And when you learn or work at things that aren’t games, recognize that frustration and annoyance you feel is progression, and that your actually getting it and can do it. And that you will do it
@@ArneBab Very true. Additionally, you would rent the difficult retro game and be stuck with it for three days. So you would have to "get good" over and over again.
@@GuyFromJupiter yeah i learned this by playing cuphead and geometry dash xd, but seriously tho, i feel like he talked a lot more for a specific type of gamers rather than all, i mean i always do everything i ahve to for a day, like studying and all that and than play games, cuz imo all that he said can apply (if not more) to social media like yt shorts and tiktork, instagram...
And now you just described why difficult games got my child brain hooked on the feeling of satisfaction of overcoming/understanding difficult/stressful things. Still very useful now. I'm in my 30s, 'been playing since I was 7-8. I decided to own a boat and become a liveabord in the next 10 years. Do I know anything about boat engineering? No. Am I aware I'll have to learn a ton of vastly different skills, including motor repairs, charting, plumbing, electrics, etc? Yes. Does that dissuade me? No, not even a little. Not knowing things doesn't scare me. Not allowing myself to learn and repeatedly doing the same thing, becoming stagnant, does. You want to do it? Then throw yourself at it.
While watching this video I was encouraged to go outside and enjoy nature for a bit while I listened to it. Afterwards I took your advice and sat with my emotions. I'm shocked at how well this worked because within about an hour or two I felt encouraged to begin job searching. I'm not quite ready to give up gaming as a whole because it's a hobby I enjoy and it provides my friends and I with something to do together, but I can see now how stepping away from it and not suppressing your negative emotions can motivate us to be productive.
Hey man, its been two months. How's the search? You land something or an interview? I was crippled by gaming at one point, i think i still am. Cuz im here. But i wana know if you got to follow thru with this comment. Im gonna go stare at a wall i guess and see if it helps lol.
@@ChronicSkooma hey dude I was crippled by gaming even though I don’t play video games anymore I still get that overwhelming urge to play that gets triggered by me simply watching someone else play. For me gaming was a hobby but eventually turned into a coping mechanism.
@@HarpalMalhi-pn3to We don’t grow in our comfort zone. That’s my motivation. A flower rarely grows in the dark. It needs exposed to the elements, feel the harsh rain a d the hot sun. When we sit at stare at a screen we rarely grow. I fill my time with extra work I cannot ignore. I got a second job and I’m part of a nonprofit organization that helps veterans heal. A lack of free time will eat up my time I used to spend on a computer. I still game, but I pick games I can put down at a moments notice. (Dont play league of legends, try Kenshi.) multiplayer games caused me to have an emotional investment in the outcome of hours long frustrations. Spending 10 hours a day doing something and having nothing to show for it except rage really ruins your life. I turned my vices into helping others with vices. Maybe look into filling your free time with commitments you can’t back down from, force yourself to not think about gaming ya know? Just my two cents.
This was really depressing. I turned to video games as an escape because my life has so much trauma in it. I feel as if I was born with nothing good or no good advantages. It seems like a lot of work needs to be done to get some good in my life, and it feels like there needs to be very little for something bad to happen. In the video game, I feel happy instantly and I can forget how badly my life sucks.
Step 1 for me was realizing that saying I have 0 skills is giving up. You won’t develop any if you never try. No one will believe in you unless you do first. Your comment is well typed and understandable, many people aren’t even capable of that much.
What has started to help me is to remember that, every time I get an urge to play, my life will be there, waiting in exactly the same state I left it in, once I close the game. Always.
Most people are born with No advantages over another person yes their is social political and monetary. don’t feel bad that you aren’t what you can become.
I am currently in deep shit because of my bad video game habits. I'm glad to have found this video. I'm glad to find someone who understands how I think and feel about my situation. Tysm, I learned a lot today
Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today. If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤
@@yaz8165 Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today. If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤😊
@@clashofaction249 Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today. If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤ 😊
I didn’t play games for 11 years and was socially successful. I ended up feeling annoyed with life. All of my different friend groups always had problems and drama. Now I play games, exercise and eat healthy. My life has never been more peaceful and rewarding.
everyone is peculiar and all this guy try to do is generalize everyone and everything into 1 single group, which is a very miserable approach and very unscientific.
@@MrEliasQueiroga people like you should mind their own businesses, if someone's happy with gaming it's okay, if you can't enjoy a simple video game it's your issue not ours
I find it interesting that you said "it feels like life is passing you by" As a mature student back in university, this is how I feel. I know that my end goal is good, but being in university feels like the world is passing me by.
I'm 42 and this is absolutely me. I feel like if I don't have step by step instructions I become paralyzed. School contributed to this. I never had to think about anything in school. I didn't have to study, I never did my homework and still passed. Even won awards in highschool. But the moment I left I had no idea what to do and I've flopped around like a dying fish for the twenty-ish years since. I never considered how much games probably contributed to this. I started when I was 4. My son was even younger. I'm worried at how much like me he is.
I have to disagree with that mindset though because plenty of well made games encourages the player to try again and ignore failure (which reflects the real world, one failure is not the end of everything). And usually there is more than 1 way or option to clear a game, which means problem solving skills. Learnt more from gaming about that than 14 years of school ever will.
I'm like you in that school setting, I studied for 5 minutes just to refresh and got 90/100, "that's great, more time for gaming" always top 2 or 3 in class, now at 25 I feel that severe lack in serotonin as I can't lift up my business, hell, even I don't know what I want to do for a living
@@Andmau2552 you're young, you don't have to *know* exactly what you are doing, either try stuff from your course of study or branch out abit, read around, get skills or something, explore your options. too often teachers and parents mistakenly believe a person at 14-16 should know their course in life when no way someone so young would have the wisdom to do so. middle age career changes and all that are more common than led to believe. Also not everyone likes or love their work, some people just choose one they can tolerate and live the life they want outside of work.
You can apply this to any sort of escaping reality type of thing, like watching movies or series, sports and so forth. Because mainly without the hobbies we have life becomes very plain. Work eat sleep repeat. Without any hobbies we are all bound to be depressed. It is all about balance, to much of anything is bound to harm us in some way in the long run.
Exactly, excessively doing anything and neglecting yourself is never going to be beneficial. This video is very much like Star Signs or having your fortune read; throw a load of shit and see what sticks. It's much more likely that people predisposed to these problems find solace in gaming, not that it causes them. But if Dr K would like to publish his peer reviewed research to say the opposite then I'll happily change my mind.
Yes and no. It depends on the hobby. Spending many hours a day playing an instrument is what it takes to reach a good level. Doing intense sports too is very beneficial for the body akd the mind. Cooking, sewing, writing, painting, woodworking... If you spend your free hours doing those kind of things, the upsides simply not comparable to gaming or tv... The fact is, some hobbies definitely are superior to others. The key is to learn to find auch educational hobbies amusing enough to replace gaming amd tv with, say, going for a hike, learning an instrument, or anything new for that sake.
@@richardf.6430 It depends on the type of gaming, video games are a sport too. I agree that some hobbies are more beneficial than others, but in this case, gaming has bad things like everything else, but also good things, develops mental abilities, pattern recognition, learning new languages, etc. It depends on what you play, it is not the same to play something that you only have to press a button to play something that you have to create strategies, overcome challenges, etc. Can not generalize.
@@justl30b the way I engage with video games has definitely caused me to develop cognitive and spatial skills that I never would have otherwise , but at the same time I know people who engage with video games in a way that really doesn’t accomplish anything besides triggering the reward center for pressing buttons
I'm not a (heavy) gamer, but I needed to hear that serotonin vs dopamine explanation. I've been depressed for several years, but sometimes I (or others) question whether that's even true because I do have small happy moments. Like feeling miserable all day, but then enjoying ice cream for 5 minutes. Your explanation makes so much sense. I refuse to be gaslit any longer! I will use this new knowledge to defend myself!!
He also has a video where he mentions that a clinical depression should take about over year to recover in normal conditions but external elements such alcohol or gaming can affect the normal cycle and throw the person in longer states of depression.
I mean to be fair not always is depression a person feeling that way 24/7. It doesn't mean your unable to ever have happy moments throughout your day. Its not so simple as being unable to ever be happy.
@@StephenHopkinsVaults The Great Depression refers to the economic state of many countries experienced. I think this happened during the years post-WW1 up until USA got heavily involved in WW2.
Tbh, what he says sounds like truth on the surface, but in actuality, it's very shallow. Decades of studies show the very opposite effect. People who play video games have a better ability in learning and problem solving. But it s true that not all games are made equal. Games that promote cooperation between players, puzzle solving, or very complicated mechanics are superior to mindless games in matter of benefits to the brain. Studies have also shown that effects on mental health are minimal, but if abused to escape real-world problems, they do the same thing as any other drug. Personally, there is also the mindset in regard to your approach to life in general. As his example says , feeling good because he beat the river, or because you achieved that or that, that works as long as your mentality says that those achievements realy matter, if you wanna use them to impress people, get a mate or something. But if you re like me, for example, and just do stuff for the sake of having fun, and not to get achievements, no experiment with life and not keep a monotone routine, well the entire premise of the video falls. I'm just saying.
the funny thing is I was born with ADHD and the certain quirks that I had pretty much fit neatly into each of these categories one after another. every shortcoming I have experienced, you have described an answer to. I never really played video games enough to change my brain chemistry like you were talking about, like literally less than 2 hours a week, and despite that, you've given me a perfect template to overcome my independent problems. it kinda felt like being handed the wrong pieces to a puzzle, but finding a way to make them fit inside the puzzle of my own head.
As a person who also has ADHD, Video Games is just a distraction for me, i've learn to control myself in the hyperactivity matter and video games calm me down, in some way. thought, im not addicted to them either. i played like 5 hours per week, mostly in a span of 2-4 days. And most of the categories that are talked about in the video also fit with some quirks i had
My ADHD on the other hand made me dependent on stimulants and drugs. I live for a surge of Adrenaline and it has begun to disrupt my sleeping patterns even though I work out 4 times a week, eat a healty diet and have a job and get a lot of supplements. I found that I use things like Ritalin, or other meth drugs prescribed for ADHD or Caffeine or gaming at nights a lot to stay alert all the time and also boost my morale up. When I take none of these substances for a day, I feel there is no point to living. I still do my tasks somewhat but I cannot understand the motif. I cannot understand why I wanted to do them or why I had those plans or why I'm even alive. On the other hand when I indulge in them every day, it takes that feeling of empty but it supresses my sleep hormone reproduction (melatonin) and causes a considerable level of stress in my body and It's very troublesome to have to go the gym restless. It slows down my progress too. I'm surprised i'm still building muscle to be honest.
@@corwyncalc4329 Exactly. And gaming addiction (and sometimes some other issues that have much deeper roots than just adhd, addiction or games). Which is rare amongst gamers. To me it has felt like Doctor K initially always praised video games as good for the brain, as science has always demonstrated, but in the recent couple months/years has capitalized more and more on an audience that related to ADHD and gaming (rather than any mental health like he used to, as a gamer who is for gamers, not against them, but that's what people want now, something to blame, and the easiest thing is video games especially when a lot of his audience with ADHD can relate to the issues he describes, and questionable self-help rethorics are more popular than ever and often demonize gaming), and has been talking excessively about all those absolutely incredibly negative effects gaming now has. He has increasingly made it seem like gaming is a much more widespread and severe issue than it actually is, and it's starting to feel kind of dishonest (even if i don't doubt gaming has those effects on the brain to some extent, and can be devastating for those who are addicted) as if it's more to appeal to an audience than to actually try to help explain and solve mental health issues, to help grow the channel or sell ADHD books. Which i admit would be pretty surprising coming from him, but you never know for sure what a content creator is thinking. I wonder what is actually going on, but something feels off about it. Has our science been wrong all along and making a complete 180° on gaming and all the benefits for cognitive functions, mental health, stress relief, memory, problem solving that they supposedly had, yet is all being backtracked on in the polar opposite direction? But it seems like it would be something that conservatives would push to demonize games as they've always done, yet Doctor K is absolutely not like that, so it makes me wonder how reliable his sources are, even if i trust his ability to be able to find legitimate studies. So what then, is the answer that this is just relevant to a specific subset of video games and susceptible players which make up a minority of them, but have more predatory game loop models, such as some of the biggest AAA games and mobile games? I could definitely see that be a thing, but that would make the way Doctor K has been sensationalizing it disingenuous. I've been wondering if anyone has been noticing this or felt this way. Of course, the videos and the lessons that you can learn from them are still very much universally valuable. I'm not dissing that.
3 years ago my dad asked me what was the most hours I had in any game. DOTA2, 3784 hours I replied. My dad then says, Imagine if you had that many hours in your other life passions So I persued 3784 hours of real life. Thanks dad ❤
@@MegaMikeZero Got about 17k hrs on WoW. And I did start playing it in the end of 2012. Before that about 10k hrs in Call of Duty 1+2(didn't like the newer ones). Then there's a lot other games like 4k in cs:go about 2000 in LoL Just end of last year I quit due to some health problems I got. Now I play maybe 5-8 hrs a week at most some casual games. Dota I only have about 600 hrs also starting from 2013 but that game never stuck to me. I'm just bad in Mobas and only good in FPS Games or MMOPRGS. In LoL I also still suck it was only a side game to WoW. So I put those 2k hrs in in a matter of like 6 years. With that little time commitment you can't really get good.
0:16: 🎮 The video discusses the impact of years or decades of gaming on the brain. 3:38: 🎮 The imbalance of dopamine and serotonin in gamers leads to a lack of confidence and difficulty in engaging in the real world. 7:17: 🎮 Engaging in challenging activities that lead to a sense of contentment can help gamers overcome serotonergic aversion. 10:57: 🧠 The video discusses the role of serotonin in treating panic attacks and trauma-related hyper vigilance. 14:36: 💔 Betrayal in marriage can have a lasting impact on trust, similar to the effect of video games on shutting off negative emotions. 18:10: 🎮 Video games provide too much guidance and prevent gamers from developing problem-solving skills in real life. 21:42: 📝 The video discusses the process of breaking down the task of finding a job into smaller, manageable pieces. Recap by Tammy AI
I have been gaming for 32 years, and I have not experienced any of this. Course I have a very traumatic childhood and games help me mentally. Course I do this all in moderation. I also have insomnia due to CPTSD, and gaming puts my mind to rest so I can get back to sleep. So my case is unique to me as I don't know anyone else like me at all. I should also note that I only play games on their hardest difficulty.
@@gamervet4760 I think his target subject is probably chronic gamer, those that do it with no moderation, since you only do it in moderation, that's probably why.
Despite gaming taking a good portion of my free time, and being a huge part of my childhood, I believe it has given me the ability to learn things extremely quickly. Playing a very large selection of different games throughout my life has strengthened my ability to grasp concepts much quicker.
Exactly, thats the true affects on the brain problem solving ability. Without gaming i would not be as successfull as i am today. I also always say to my employer to pick the lazy person over the overconfident person. Lazy people will always find a way to solve a big problem with the minimal work necessary. This video may apply to some people but not the most people.
Similar for me. But also, I think one of the most significant challenges I faced in my childhood was severe anger issues; one of the big things that helped me overcome that was Dark Souls. Fighting Artorias was challenging, it took many attempts to eventually succeed - but it was too awesome to get angry at, so these repeated failures didn't get to me that much. That taught me how to face adversity without frustration, and it taught me to *enjoy* overcoming adversity (taught me to get serotonin from it - some genres of games are actually good for that!), which helps with taking more initiative in my life. (Then this was pushed a lot further more recently by mental health crises last year...but while living through those helped make me stronger, I still had to be strong enough *to live through them in the first place* - and while there are of course other factors, games like Dark Souls certainly helped me get to that point.)
Yes, gaming gives us skills, but unfortunately at the same time, it gives us elementary debuffs that hinder us from doing and applying those skills. Motivation, procrastination, energy management. Literally with everything in the digital world I noticed that there are both upsides and downsides to it. Managing the downsides is so hard, oof. But it seems to be the key to be learned towards a successful life. Our generation requires so much mental control. We have to be hyper-aware, what the digital media does to us internally, and combat that. I think it's as hard as opium, cocaine and other hard drugs. It's just soooo easy to get lost in it. Lost in a way, that we become externally controlled, we lose control to decide on our own, what we want to do now. I wish everyone the absolute best on that path towards learning to tackle it. I walk with you.
@@IroAppe Fair point about everything having upsides and downsides, but I think even that is a bit too much of a generalisation. Personally, I actually find that I feel *more* motivated and procrastinate *less* in months where I play games more. It just comes naturally for me to play a game like Elden Ring or Crusader Kings 3 for maybe a couple of hours, and let the "momentum" of the resulting feelings carry me through more significant goals. (Plus in Elden Ring's case, it helps teach perseverance. It's easier to keep functioning through even the lowest moods if I'm used to facing adversity.) As a way to track it, even; I write poems and short stories. The absolute minimum I write being one poem every 4 days - and in most months, that's the norm for me. But in months like this where I've spent more time playing games...I've *also* written a short story (which took about 3 hours of writing) *and* am ahead of schedule on my poetry, even while dealing with worse circumstances at home than I usually would. (Now to play devil's advocate, maybe that correlation is not from causation. Maybe I'm playing games more *because* I feel more motivated for some unknown other reason, instead? But either way, it shows that gaming hasn't been harmful in my case)
Well at least for me without my interest in gaming i would never had an interest in PC's and would probably today not work in the space sector firing up satellites. And you would probably say im a extreme case with my sometimes 40-60h gaming per week when i have nothing better to do. Not everone is same not everyone get negativly effected and i would assume there are other negative influences in the past which causes a "problem" with gaming since you will use it as a Exit door and not out of fun@@IroAppe
I had the gamer trait before it was gaming. I read fantasy obsessively from I was 8-16 yo. I now realise that it fulfilled all the same purposes for me and penaltied me the same way, as described here.
Yeah exactly the same I think that was 1 part of the video that I would have liked him to expand upon more. People use all kinds of substances and activities to avoid pain and I agree with the premise of how we use these things to avoid our internal negative emotion. However, I'm not sure I agree with the premise that, "before video games when we felt lonely we'd seek other human connection" as people have coped with loneliness in a myriad of other, much more, unhealthy ways long before video games existed (binge eating, drinking, smoking, self destruction). While I feel like gaming likely has unique characteristics that effect the brain differently I think the root of the issue runs deeper. And much like everything gaming, if done in moderation, is likely a net positive on one's life. I know it's the only way that I can still connect with friends and family who live thousands of miles away multiple times a week. The social benefits of gaming I feel are vastly uncommented upon in most modern "gaming health" debates.
@@PaulsonAustin I think the point is just to clearly illustrate the function that gaming plays in our lives, especially for people who haven't even thought about it this way before. Of course there have been all sorts of avoidance behaviours and addictions in existence for centuries, and maybe he could have mentioned that, but this video is specifically aimed at gamers, and even more specifically at gamers who may not be super aware of this stuff.
I initially got defensive but I realised this is for those who are going through a severe addiction - and with addiction, its important to keep it in check and find balance
Thing is most of the time you're not aware you're addicted to something. Heavy addiction can look quite normal to the addicted brain. A lot of addicted people (myself included) look at people with an addiction and say "thank god i'm not addicted like that person", while being EXACTLY as addicted as that person. Not saying it as a fact, because i don't know you, but if your first reaction was to get defensive, maybe there is a reason for that.
@@HareK0nnen I admire your insight, thanks for taking the time to give your input. My defensiveness more so came from experience of seeing people, myself included, shunned for enjoying video games as a side-hobby. I should keep that insecurity in check.
As a gamer with ADHD, i used videogames to help encourage me to do different tasks that i couldnt necessarily do. they were like my reward for doing daily activities. Working out along side that helped to boost my confidence out and about, and talking about videogames is one of the things i am passionate about. My students love it when i bring up videogame references in class too which helps get everyone motivated! it i guess it has a knock on effect
A lot of these points don't apply to me, but I see how they can affect others. The important thing is to find a way to moderate gaming and fill something productive in such as exercise, language learning, building/construction, farming, etc. Serotonin is produced by absorbing sunlight and doing activities that are engaging + challenging + productive. Youll sleep better for it, too. You dont have to give up gaming... but don't use it to give up everything else.
Agreed, I live a normal life, hang out with friends, hold a stable job in hr, and I spend my free time gaming. My friends are the same and we talk about games, work, dnd, all while bowling. Then we go home and hop on ffxiv.
I'm a person who has been gaming pretty much my entire life and since I was young, it felt like when I tried to do something, I always had to struggle with things like procrastination and determination; I could start on something but then at the third day or so I'd quit. It felt like I couldn't control my life. I found myself always going back to games when I felt disappointed, and never actually addressed my negative emotions either. After watching this video I learned why all of this was happening... I'm relieved there are solutions to these problems, as I'm tired of being hold back by my own self when I want to achieve my dreams. I will commit to doing the things you mentioned in this video. Here's to a new start in life. 1. Engage in serotinergic activities 2. Learn to tolerate negative feelings 3. Break down tasks in two
That's awesome to read. The first step is to be aware that you are the one holding you back, and you definitely did. Stay strong when times gets hard. Good luck with your journey my friend !
I feel ya Bro, I too have been feeling like you my entire life and FINALLY I've found something that pretty much describes what I need to do. Hope we can achieve it.
I'm I lot older, I really did not get into gaming alot until my early thirties. So for me gaming is a hobby, I still did and do a lot of the every day things in life, but I would say that gaming does make me procrastinate a little more. Im socially awkward and don't like all the BS people do to each other, so I did retreat at times from social interactions (work was never an issue) to being alone even before I was a gamer, yet still have friends and forced myself to engage in social activities. The thing I see in gaming though is its a lot like life. There is a starting place, the place you are at now and the quest or goal, there are rules in life that you have to know to get to the goal, and there are thing to do in the real world to buff your real world stats to make you better at reaching your goals, like exercising, learning, working (making money), ect. You actually have to keep a lot of things in your head when you game to do well and that's true in life as well. So you might want to try to look at life as you look at a game and systematically break down what you want in life and how to get to your goals, then set a schedule in your life to get those things done in the real world. Here is the thing though, life is a long game and the only one that really counts, it takes time to get where you want to go, there are set backs and you will fail sometimes, that's ok everyone else does too. But if you keep working at moving forward in life you will see progress in time, be patient and work hard at it. You cant really escape your life, your always there, your always you, ignoring that will catch up to you one day. Treat yourself well, its amazing how so many of us treat ourselves in ways we would never treat someone we love,, so as Jorden Peterson says treat yourself like you would treat someone you love, do the same things for yourself as you would do for someone you love to have a better life.
What some people in this comment section don't get is he's not attacking gamers, he's a gamer himself, he's just stating objective facts to help people understand where their problems MAY come from, of course gaming has positive aspects, videogames are a form of art afterall, but the point of the video is to underline the negative ones (which sadly are the majority) to help people overcome the consequences of those negative aspects.
Especially I’m todays current industry which has literal psychologists on their team to do whatever they can to addict as many players as they can. It’s becoming a fucked industry
If he wants to make the video about the negative aspects of gaming thats fine. But dont make your caption say: "how years of gaming affects your brain" cause thats really not what he's talking about. He is literally talking about addiction and even starts out saying "being a gamer is living life on hard mode" like really bro?? And to say he is a gamer?? Lol when was the last time he actually streamed a game? All his videos in yt arent about him being a gamer but rather talking about the health aspects of having this lifestyle which is fine but dont go and make this video with the misleading captions and thumbnail and then just literally talk about addiction. I would have been fine if he had a caption that said "gaming and addiction" or something along those lines because in this video he literally associates gamers as addicts. (Gamers=addicts) which is obviously false. I was looking forward to watching a video about how gaming affects the brain because thats what the caption was saying. Instead I watched an addiction lecture with gaming as the drug and the gamer as the drug addict. Idk man it feels like theres an agenda behind this more than anything. I feel like i wasted my time watching this video because the captions and thumbnail literally mislead me. I would think he did that for the views but whatever. Im done and unsubbing from this guy.
This video only explained everything about myself from childhood to teenage years. I’ve been struggling from my youngest years with emotions because I lived it rough. I would play video games to make me forget all of my negative emotions without facing them. This video made me cry, it’s free and very useful therapy. Thank you for explaining and enlightening the problems, i’ll be forever thankful
I’m 33 and this video has described my life so accurately. Over the past year I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety and I’ve been trying to do a lot of work feel better. This includes playing less games, therapy, doing more stuff outside, and ADHD and depression meds. It’s changed my life.
@@molikeur also its because alot of people who had ADHD in the past just slipped under the radar and lived a life of difficulty, there isn't an epidemic of cases, there's a realisation..
18:19 I'm 26 yrs old and still don't have a license and Dr. K's explanation about not knowing what to do because i dont have an organic UI built into my eyes showing me quest markers was so spot on lol we have to make our own quest markers. We're the developers for our own lives.
It's such a good thing to have a person who truly understands you, who "have been there before" and knows what he's talking about. This channel can really help those who need it. I guess, I was lucky. I came up with those ideas about "bad thoughts", "small steps" and "easy hard work" almost alone. Buta reminder is always a good thing
I have been a gamer all my life but since 7th grade I had to be aware of my mental status. I adopted some of the techniques you mentioned today by chance throughout my life. The staring at a wall thing definitely is something I do sometimes for up to an hour. This last year operationalization with my problems helped. They problems don't seem as big as they once were and progress albeit small is still progress.
This is one of your most life changing videos that you have ever put out. almost every single one of your viewers struggles with this issue and you just laid out the most understandable road map to self improvement. you deserve the world my friend ❤
i have found that going to the gym, playing games mainly only with friends online, and tracking my nutrition have kept me pretty well in-check as someone who plays video-games a lot. Having a job also helps because it indirectly takes time off the game without you having to force yourself since you’re going to have to go to work regardless. This is great because you’re doing hard work while you earn money for your time.
i feel so called out in this video. honestly, almost all of those experiences that was mentioned here feels so relatable. i was playing video games since i was 5 (i'm 27 now) and i don't think i even have a proper break in between those years (like i always have video games to play as far as i remember in my life). thank you HealthyGamerGG team for making and publishing this video, it really helps me understand the problem in my brain and the possible solution to it. i hope soon i can start change my behavior to a better one with some of your advices and start solving the problem myself :)
I am part of the community, but I am also kind of old (millenial) and have a young teen son. This video made me understand a lot about him and his gaming, as well as why I struggle to help him to be motivated to do anything but gaming. And I am not talking about going to ban gaming or being online. That's just silly. I literally mean: Being able to help him appreciate life more and be interested in it.
I have 4 sons, I game with all of them, honestly the best way I've found to get them to appreciate, work, and aim themselves at a goal is to believe they can, communicate that I expect things of them, validate their dreams when they tell me. Dr. K is describing my father to a T, and one thing my father never did for me was believe in me or himself.
I’m 23, and this is one of the BEST videos on the internet. Not only is it revolutionary in terms of neuroscience, but in conveying information too. As if nothing was barred or hidden, as deeply opposed to someone sharing an idea with a competitor or rival, to hide as much information as they can from others so that they retain an edge of knowledge. This video truly grasps the concept of giving and sharing information, almost like that of what describes; An Act of True Love. Dr K., you set an exemplary figure that I am highly, and fondly grateful for.
Man, this video hits like a truck. For someone who's been abused and bullied both physically and psychologically by my parents and classmates basically all my life, gaming is all I ever had to keep me going and I probably wouldn't be here without it, but I can see its effects on me now. I probably won't ever stop gaming as that's not the point of the video and also because it's a core part of me at this point, but I'll definitely sit down and think a lot on this. Thank you for opening my eyes, I appreciate it.
What happens to a business man that work all day and doesn't have time to do what he loves, is the same for a gamer that forgets take car other parts of life, at the end you will be unhappy. You must have time to do what you love, in this case playing videogames, there is no point of deny that, but it can easily become a vice, and this can literally can make you a mess even ruin your life. Be conscient of what you do with your time and how affects your body and mind. What the video says is scarily true.
I am a very strange Gamer... I completed 3 university degrees, was popular and voted in president of the ASEAN club and SRC (Student Representitive Council), played basketball and badminton every Friday, and did my blue belt grading for Teakwondo, all the while raiding World of Warcraft every night and playing Nintendo games with my best friend every weekend. I always had good grades, so my parents didn't really care what I did. In fact, I got a new laptop every couple of years to play games on because they thought I was using it for homework.... which wasn't entirely a lie. I studied Infomation Technology, so most of the time, I was working on programming and game development, so... my gaming evntually became research and development for my university projects.
you're not strange, everyone is peculiar and all this guy try to do is generalize everyone and everything into 1 single group, which is a very miserable approach and very unscientific.
@@MrEliasQueirogaThis video is for people whose addiction to gaming is seriously detrimental. This video is not for all gamers and not for the commenter you're replying to. Stop whining, this is free and he never implied what you said.
As a 26yo man that has been a tryhard gamer his whole life, that feels behind in life and that struggles with socializing, this video made a huge impact in me. I wish someone told me all of this when I was 15. My mom used to tell me I acted like a drug addict when I was gaming and I used to laugh. Now I understand.
the sad thing is you would not have listen to them telling you all this when you were 15. my nom told me but as all kids i would not listen. i just did the same two weeks ago talking to my little cousin (15years younger) on what is better for him. he did not want to know. give him 10 years and he will come back saying he wishes someone would have said that to him (what i did). no one will listen, ever
Why does it matter how others think of you? Don’t let others shame you for your interests. Video games have been getting a bad rap since their invention.
I relate with you so much. My mom also used to tell me I was playing too much but I was completely in denial since I was addicted. I also developed issues with communication that got worse over time as I was isolated most of the time, and day to day life was difficult since. I started very young so it took really long to realize it, but now I just saw the bad sides of this hobby and wish I could spend all the time grinding games mindlessly doing other things I enjoy. It saddens me because I was a pretty smart kid and I feel like I wasted my potential. I really think that this is like a trap that you can't get out of by yourself once you get addicted. Of course, this is still entertainment. And if you do it under a controlled environment that's fine. But most kids don't have this awareness and unless their parents set boundaries, it's truly gonna affect them in a bad way.
@@tf9350 you can’t waste your potential unless your dead. You have plenty of time to do whatever you define as productive or that will lead to being successful. Even if you just tried, you would be doing more then those that don’t which is a massive chunk of the population. Everyone is afraid of failure in todays age, when in reality the most successful people have failed the most, but just learnt from the failures and kept trying
i felt like a 1 lvl character aka a newborn while i was watching the video... he literally explained us why we feel like a shit AND provided us with solutions for this problem. things the author said seem so easy to come across like why wouldnt i think about it??? i truly appreciate your help, healthygamergg 🙏😭
I was a gamer early and I'm still a gamer, but procrastination was never a problem. The biggest problems in my life were that I'd do all the things that people said they wanted me to do, and then I never got the reward. Constant rejection and work completed in vain were the experiences of my 20s. I suppose maybe that's common for most young men though, whatever their hobbies are.
I've got a great LIFE hack for you! Rename your "To Do" list "Quest Log". Assign rewards for each "quest" e.g. mins of game time, favourite foods and snacks, coins, read one page of your favourite comic book, watch 1 episode of your tv show or anime. Make sure they are things you can give yourself right away after each task or at least at the end of the day (Like when you would have handed all your quests in at once, before logging off.) When it clicks in your mind that life is just a series of World of Warcraft daily quests, your productivity will just sky-rocket.
@@VixeyTeh Completely beside the point. The ultimate reward is other people. You work hard, you get a pat on the back or, in time, a promotion or the ability to grow your business. You work on yourself, you become more popular in your community. But what if that does not happen, or doesn't happen to the extent that you feel necessary for the slog to be rewarding? This is the problem even moderately successful people face these days. They lack the kind of community that would give them the necessary feedback, in terms of directions as well as rewards. Retreating into gaming is just a symptom. Society is disintegrating into cells too small to further support the human experience we evolved for.
wow, I've been able to relate to your videos before but this one just hit with every word, and it was all making sense. I'm in college but I've always been a heavy gamer and procrastinator which has lead me to get behind in college. My sister graduated early, my friends already have six figure jobs, and I still can't do the simple things in life that I know I have to do. I can't ever stick with a positive behavior pattern for very long, and the cycle of feeling ashamed for not doing what I have to do then not doing it continues.
A video that unbiasedly and accurately explains how and why things happen and how to fix them is a thousand times better than someone just telling you to stop doing it. After the gifted child video this feels too relatable and significant to not learn from. GG
You have just described the past 5 years of my life with words that I have never heard of but had many familiar experiences with. I am very glad to hear that there is always someone who will understand my situation and can help me through it. Originally I thought it was just myself that lacked the ability to do things, but now that you have informed me of everything I will try to take a step for change that I have longed for. Thank you. ❤
It really depends on how committed and determined you are to endure suffering without distractions and work things out. I've been constantly trying to get out of distractions lately and it's really hard. I want to start things but don't know how and my brain tricks me that "What I've done is enough already" so I give in. But Everytime, we fall we still need to get up.
The breaking down your problems is what I've been doing for over 3 years now, I am still struggling to finish the "main quest", but it is a really good advice to give to someone who is struggling with the same problem. If I could time travel back, I would certainly give this advice to past me. I always thought that I was the only one struggling with this problem, but reading the other comments tells me that I'm not alone in this battle
im always surprised by how often this guy can casually drop the best practical advice, backed by science and a very logical train of thought. his preparation process has gotta be bordering on perfect for these videos
Exactly!! Most self improvement channels just make a 10 minute video saying a whole lotta nothing while this guy is giving so much great practical advice, I love it
Hands down this video has been one of your best. I'm recovering from a severe video game addiction from my early twenties (I'm turning 27 now) and what you mentioned here resonated A LOT with me on an astounishing level. I'm certain I'm on a good way now, but negative emotions and fatigue are often plagueing me, resulting in a negative feedback loop, with it's ebbs and flows of affecting ego strength. The way you frame the problem takes away one important aspect of these negative feedback loops, and that's the way of self-relating, which is a key factor in leaving the past behind and not feeding negative complexes. They way you explain this issue on a neuropsychologic level makes me access important things: Self forgiveness and a sense of groundedness, well balanced with a sense of self-responsibility! Thank you Dr. K!
I am about to hit 30 and really trying to get in control and understanding of my mental and emotional imbalances. I have been playing games since I was a kid, and I was worried that it effected me more negatively then I originally imagined. I finally fought the fear and started watching your videos on how it HAS affected me, and I am really appreciative of this.
This is what has me stuck. Ive always been a gamer, but after dropping out of college and discovering my ADHD and Autism, i went back to my coping strategy from my childhood- I kept playing games. I carry my switch if I've to go out anywhere and most days I stay in my room and stay in a state of escape. I'll bring this up with my therapist tomorrow. Thanks for the video. ❤
This is everything I needed to hear. Gaming keeps stealing me away from what I want to do so I'll be sitting there having fun but feeling guilty the entire time and angry at myself for not doing what I need to be doing after work or on the weekends.
I feel like over the last few years my daydreams became something of an addiction to me very similar to how you described video games in this video. Every time i begin to feel negative emotions, instead of sitting on them, i retreat into my own daydreams where stories take place, where things go right and wrong, but everything is under my control and it has the same effects as video games on me, the numbing of negative emotions and the gaining of dopamine, all taking place in my own mind. I could be doing a serotonergic activity but in the back of my mind there's always that ongoing imaginary storyline basically doing what video games do, only 24/7, it happens automatically, especially when i'm trying to read and study, it's exhausting. The worst part is that it has infected one of my favorite pass-times which is listening to music, i could be listening to anything, but it's like a sleeper agent, like the sound of music turns on the story simulation inside my mind, i literally can't try to relax by listening to anything because i begin to daydream immediately and it's intense, i can't think properly about the real world and so i just give up and allow myself to be swallowed by my thoughts, and it just ends up tiring me.
Thought I was the only one gang, it’s super intrusive a lot of the times but when ur bored it’s fun and gives a lot of dopamine. Blessing and a curse….
@@Amanwiza Yup, I'm a pretty big daydreamer too. The fact that you can do it any time and anywhere is both the best and worst thing about it. With something like a phone addiction you can just physically put the phone away. You can't physically put away your mind
I think a name for this might be maladaptive daydreaming? I've only heard of it so I don't know any details, but it might be something to look into for solutions.
I used to do this all the time, a little less now. I couldn’t walk outside without my headphones, walking with music gave some confidence haha. And once a day for an hour I would listen to music (mostly soundtracks) it would make the stress of daily things (exams, loneliness, future career, etc.) go away and ‘replenish’ my will to do things. Eventually life got more complicated and that coping mechanism was not enough, covid lowkey helped me avoid a panic attack or a meltdown at school because I avoided facing my peers and teachers face to face I was able to take criticism or downright bashing without being stared at, and eventually I became comfortable with asking questions online and in person. I still retreat to those behaviors when I’m feeling especially down so I’ll take Dr. K’s advice on doing things in real life I would like to do.
I have never been more called out by a YT intro than this one. Totally encompasses my life and I thought I was just a loser, thank you so much for explaining that it's not just me and I can fix it.
Dr. K, I used to be in a state of Serotinergic Aversion for several years, and doing 'simple' things like studying, doing laundry, making myself food used to be so hard for me. Gaming was the only thing I found myself driven to do. As of the last year or so, I find myself constantly seeking serotinergic activities like studying, making food, working out, running, etc. However, I also find it hard to sit down and game for hours on end like I used to (not sure if this is a good or bad thing lol). I'd much rather do something 'productive' than game even though I want to game.
@@caseyeaston7470 For me, I think it started with forcing myself to actually make my bed every morning when I woke up. It’s such a small thing, but it made me start my day by accomplishing something tangible. From there it snowballed over the course of a year or two, where I would keep asking myself: “okay what’s next?”. I was eventually able to regain my love for weightlifting and long distance running among other things like studying and stuff.
I also had a similar experience of gaming less because it wasn't as rewarding as serotonergic activities. In my case I was able to take a shortcut because I has people close to me (mostly family) that ran and exercised at least semi-regularly. I just followed their lead and quickly got into running and joined my high school's cross country team / track & field teams. Because I made friends with people on the running teams I was surrounded by other people who encouraged me to run with them on weekends and further step away from playing games all day. In short, join a friendly / casual running club if you have the opportunity.
yea at this point im realizing how much worse my emotional state is when im gaming, I try and hop on but it genuinely becomes a bad experience most the time whether I win or lose the most important thing (imo) is the process of replacing all that time which gaming took up. getting off the game isnt an instant good feeling to me, I get this worrying sense of "what now?" and I think responding to that feeling in the right way is so impactful. it genuinely feels like im gonna be stuck with that "what now?" feeling FOREVER without gaming, but that's not the case at all. it's just a process of letting go of that dopamine dependence, and also figuring out what genuinely fulfills you. what makes you enjoy your time. and then working to be aware of that.
I am also a doctor now. Finished my residency and fellowship. Became a husband and father. And honestly videogames were always there for me throughout the tough times. But raising a family, i slowly went from gaming 10 hrs a day to just 30 mins many times zero hours lol. Also it helped having other physical hobbies like swimming. I conquered rivers as a child.
I am a casual gamer in my late thirties, I once was hard-core, shutting it off after twelve hours with that sinking feeling of regret. Though your points are to the extremes, I definitely agree with them and want to summarize that you need to be aware of it all and balance the physical world with the virtual, and this goes for any media device as well.
sometimes people are aware but due to other issues they feel unable or anxious at the thought of going out into the physical world and interacting with people in that kind of setting
@@timetotalk2023 that's life. Interacting with people keeps you grounded, as uncomfortable as it may be, the more you do the less scary it is and the less awkward the next round will be. Not saying you won't ever not be awkard, I still am at 40, but I embrace it and people like me for it, it's being unique and genuine.
its not about it being awkward or worrying u wont fit in. I personally used to love going out to party's getting fked up with my friends meeting new people and such but then i had some issues with some very nasty people who for about a year straight were trying to break into my house and steal my stuff partly my own fault due to the nature of the business i was in then. i had people pull knifes on me on the street try force me to go bk to mine with them and unlock the door cause they couldn't break it. i got stabbed on multiply occasions try to defend myself anyway now i cant go out without a knife and that's not safe for other people or myself if some1 with there hood up is walking behind me i assume im away to get jumped and im immediately clutching that knife or clenching my fist and 9/10 its just some1 walking minding there own bussiness on occasion i have been so sure ive ending up attacking people who weren't trying to do anything to me. i apologise for such a long repley but this is the short version tbh and this is just my reasons there r many others with other very complex issues that makes things that u mite find everyday and easy extremely diffcult, it is often far more than just fear of being solically awkward or not fitting in @@joelc3449
i apologise for the rant i don't know why i got so triggered. I have my reasons and you have yours for why interacting with people in the real world or going out can be difficult and nether are any less vaild or difficult than the other nor r the many other reasons other people struggle also. sry again joel @@joelc3449
This is really reinforcing to hear, because I've sort of been pin pointing my issues as to why I don't progress much in life (as Dr. K put) and I've been trying to fill my time with chores and more importantly, cooking my meals myself. Take time away from the screen at the very least to tend to yourself in a healthy way. Amazing advice overall. Dr. K gets it.
if you already dont spend youre time with technology that much then sell it!!!!!!!!!!!! technology becomes useless once you use it only for small stuff like you said
Having someone like this to just explain stuff like this without having to pay for it is really nice and encouraging. I’m just working and see his video pop up and listen while I work. It’s always fun to listen to what he has to say. The fact that he is or was a gamer is also comforting.
As an autistic person, socializing has always been difficult for me. I've never been able to "fit in" anywhere, or I'd always say the wrong thing and this makes socializing painfully awkward. Gaming has always been a way for me to escape that. While I don't game as much as I have in the past, I tend to engage more in hobbies that are of great interest to me now. Being home and keeping myself busy with projects and learning new skills is now my go-to for pleasure. I still like gaming tho :)
Im autistic too, but i have attention disorder, i tried some medicines but it keep being a shit, its difficult to talk with other people and i have already failed a lot trying to do other things, i try to study coding, something i like and i work with, but its just Impossible to keep it for more than 1 day. Im literaly just living and seeing my life going away while i waste my time playing, and sometimes im not really enjoying
@@victoroliveira8310 I recently got into coding as well. When I get into it, I stay into it for weeks on end but then it just sits on the shelf for a while until I think of something else to make. I get lost easily when the code branches off into too many different routines or functions. My programs are rather simple with the exception of an encryption technique I'd been working on. However, retention is spotty at best. Many times I'm still using google or going back to previous programs to figure out how something is done or how I did something before. I hope to make coding a career one day, but fear of failure is severely limiting me. If coding is something you love, keep at it! even if you don't get anywhere in life with it, it's still nice to have the ability to create something that doesn't exist elsewhere to perform a specific task, even if it's just for you.
I have been playing games since i was 6 (28 now) Everything i have felt and experianced has been summed up nicely in this video. The feelings of never being good enough, the sudden hyper feelings of anxiety to the point i was even put on medication. Fittingly, the best thing that has helped me overcome this is that i have a 10 hr job that doesnt allow any electronics and is rather intensive on the body. The feeling of acomplishment i get from doing this job day after day is better than any world ive saved playing a game. Good advice and worth taking to heart.
for people asking what kind of work: I don't know what OP does, but I can tell you that it's easy to get a job in logistics and delivery (think Amazon, Fedex, UPS), they are physically intensive and no electronics allowed (except the ones you need to do the job).
@@Blasphemousa Im not him, but I do a job with a lot of human interaction and problem solving on the spot. I put myself in a chaotic situation and solve it over and over. I get a good sense of fulfillment. If not for yourself, help others. Make their days. That will generate serotonin.
I'm glad I could subconsciously solve some of these issues on my own without knowing they were a problem, but its certainly interesting seeing some of my behaviors laid out so plainly.
Wow, you singlehandedly changed mt entire perspective on mental illness in just under 4 minutes in your “Sit with negative emotions” part. Rather than thinking of them as a hindering, they are a prompt or an incentive to better ourselves. Im now subbed
Edit: wow thank you so much to everyone for all the encouraging replies. You're all awesome and I believe in all of you! I have ADHD, pretty bad social anxiety, and I was always terrible at most sports, so I found it hard to get into team sports that I could build my social interactions with. Started lifting weights about 6 months ago and it has changed my life. It’s weirdly boring in the action but it still feels so good. I’m a long way away from my personal goals but I’m benching 70 kg/150 lbs and deadlifting 110 kg/240 lbs. Lots of people are much better than that but I’m really proud I’ve found something like this
The best part of working out is you don't have to stop being a nerd to do it. You see the majority of the results in doing one hour workouts everyday. You don't have to be a 3 hour gym rat to see results. Get your Mike Mentzer style workout in, shower, eat, and then play video games. Makes life so much better because your body and brain begin to work better, making everything else more enjoyable. Same goes for nutrition. Make your homecooked meals all nutritious and then when you go out and eat junk food with your friends, your body isn't dying because you put yet another empty calorie in it.
I’m a few months late but I really enjoyed this video as it made me reflect on my relationship with gaming and my personal development. I’ve played my whole life, but luckily my parents were smart enough to set rules and boundaries on me when it came to games. At first gaming was a social experience. I grew up in the late 90s/early 00s so everything was couch co-op or competitive local play. I learned how to use video games to build relationships and understand healthy competition. Also, I had time limits, so I couldn’t waste away entire days playing games. Had to be active or find other hobbies as well. Of course as I got older and independent sometimes I’d choose to spend an entire day gaming, eating, smoking etc but I was never fulfilled at the end of the day and noticed patterns of how I would do this mainly during low points in my life. So now I’ve created my own balance, maybe 2-3 hours every 2-3 days after all my tasks/goals are done and I could go weeks without gaming if needed to refocus on goals. It’ll always be a big part of my life and a major hobby but I’ve found the perfect balance and am a proud “filthy casual” lol it’s definitely possible to be a lifelong gamer without long term degeneracy!
One of the greatest activities to fight seratonin aversion with is working out. Not only will you feel better about yourself and more confident, it is also very good for your physical health and generally makes you more attractive.
You know for some reason, my parents and even school teachers (not gym teachers of course) would try to suggest that working out was too much work for me and that it would tire me out too much lol. This was happening when I was 14 - 17, but my case is unique because my ADHD meds (guanfacine) caused me to be almost underweight, and I’ve always eaten whatever trash I wanted to and remained perfectly slender my whole life. Only recently do I feel an actual loss of appetite though. Am I growing older lol? I always wanted to try doing climbing but it feels like my wrists have recently weakened a little over time. Although I can lift weights to a good extent (but I don’t even lift bro), I can no longer do a single pull-up, which is a little concerning. I think this is mainly because of the meds, but my parents are veggie and never let me cook meat in the house (I’d never eaten bacon for breakfast until 20). Cold meats and ready meals weren’t enough to combat this. Extremely careless on their part, but I digress. I also did jitterclicking on Minecraft every day for about 4 hours, on and off, of course. This lasted for about 3 months, until I quit Minecraft AND jitterclicking altogether because of the aching pains it gave me (also purple skin from burst blood vessel in hand). My wrist seemed okay pretty quickly, but it still felt weird sometimes. Fast forward 1 1/2 years and it randomly had constant, unbearable, almost excruciating pain. I waited an entire month where the doctor told me f*** all (to stop using it until it felt better for several weeks). I wore a kind of pressure bandage which neither me or my parents understood that I shouldn’t have worn at night, and we booked private a few days earlier than the free physio appointment. Private physio helped me immediately - physically and in soul. Though it took about 4 months of using it more and more, and doing resistance exercises (which was a challenge because I was scared the pain meant I was damaging my wrists, and I ended up doing them less than half as often as asked, even through him reassuring me that in my case it was safe), which reduced it to a minor ache after those 4 months, the pain is all gone now. But again, my wrists are both fairly weak and I think I gotta drop my meds if I don’t want to screw up my body completely going forwards… Well, that’s my story lol Also now I play souls, coming up for my level 1 no hit bosses using parry and knife run of Elden Ring
100% I wonder if its why I don't fit into Dr. Ks description, I love video games, but I work out hard and push myself. I don't seem to struggle with difficult emotions and I feel good about myself no matter where I am in my fitness journey.
This feels like such a glass half empty look on videogames. I have been playing games since I was probably 6-7 years old and still play them 2 decades later because it is just a fun hobby to have and it is nice to be part of the gaming community and discuss what you like and not like with so many different people. I experience new stories and be informed on just different elements of the gaming industry. It's no different than watching lots of movies or reading tons of books. Sure, there have been times where a game kinda consumed my life like Totk recently for example, but gaming has never been the reason I have a more introverted mindset or feel down on myself or let my life spiral out of control at points. There are so many other factors in life than games to exacerbate that kind of feeling. Just like with anything else, if you have a good grasp on the limits, you shouldn't be encouraged to give up on what you like to do with your own life.
Exactly. This guy had problems so he assumed all or, at least, the vast majority, have the same problems he has which is just not true. Games aren't the reason he's had problems, those were problems he already had that he blamed on video games. Thumbs down to this video.
i feel the same. i think he was just stretching a lot of things just so he could make a video on the topic. i would prefer to watch a more honest version
The whole "gamify your life" is why I love the game "Ringfit" and the anime "Bottom Tier Character Tomozaki-kun" : whether it's sports gamified for Ring fit or social interactions gamified for Tomozaki, they both show that everybody is capable of doing stuff, they just need to be shown a way to do it tailored for them.
I've found that having a cold bath/shower everyday helps aswell. I started doing it 2 months ago. There has been days where I've completely not wanted to do it and I've had to really force myself to get in. I feel alot better going out in public and genuinly feel more confident outside. That and little exercise not too hard but keeping up the routine has helped me immensely.
i love that he doesn't treat games like a disease, he doesn't make you get rid of it, he actually is "gamefying" life, so that its easier to understand, +1 Sub
This video is spot on. The exact reason when I turned to gaming was trying to suppressed negative emotions in life. Sometimes pain is too unbearable and I need an escape. But after a while, when I feel better, I would convert back to normal life.
I'm only 12 minutes in but I gotta say, this is exactly capturing a lot of my feelings. I've started journaling a few months ago and at some point recently I managed to make a list of issues and negative feelings I have encountered repeatedly. It helps that a couple recent events since the start of the year have given me the drive to start journaling and self-healing, and a clear goal for the future that I'm willing to sacrifice and better myself for. I've recently graduated and been gaming all my life, so I guess this is the turning point. Thanks, doc.
Damn, I read this as "I'm only 12, but I gotta say". Was really impressed there for a bit 😂 even when you said graduated, I figured it must be elementary school
Duuuuude…… for years I’ve been trying to understand how people lay out their life so easily and how they know what they want and how they’ll get there step by step and I’ve never been able to process the second step of my own journey. Thank you for this, I picked this video at random of all the ones you have and I think this is the one I needed to see today. Happy gaming🤙🏾
I have a lot of gamer friends who are retired individuals, they say if it wasn't for the games or the pets they own, they say they would have gone insane or ended up in some mental institution. A few of them are widower, and some are veterans suffering from PTSD. I guess they dont need any of the negative emotions suppressed by the gaming but just some fun and relaxing things to do. I myself would have gone off the face of the earth if it wasn't for the gaming habit I caught on back in 2013, which helped me with my depression. I know sometimes it kind of feels like addiction, but as long as you are disciplined and on schedule, it is therapeutic. Like they say, everything in moderation always helps.
Exactly, I play video games between 1-3 hours a day, and I feel great. Some times I miss a day or two. Video games helped me to get rid of depression, also helped me with my career, I work in gaming industry and I make good money because of video games.
Honestly video games have been the healthier part of my life digitally speaking, mostly because I self moderate myself pretty well. My weakness has always been doomscrolling forums, Reddit, and now TH-cam. The advice is identical regardless but its important to understand the roll each of your hobbies plays in your life/well-being. Its not perfect for me but I do have a full-time job, workout regularly, walk my dog etc... but improving my social life and stagnant career are the hurdles I'm focusing on now.
As a teen, I ran away from emotions as there was too much to handle. Partially because some issues were not mine to solve. However, as a consequence, as an adult, I had to learn how to socialize and how to play the game of life. The people I have met and the environment I found helped me evolve as a human. I'm eternally grateful for those in my path that have helped me develop. Now I can game for pleasure and I learned to not run away from emotions, though sometimes it is still difficult to break the habit as using games to mentally run away seems so comfortable in the moment.
Seems really relevant to executive function issues experienced in adhd/‘high functioning’ autism, & suggests this may be an exacerbated effect amongst those on the spectrum. Interesting, thank you. 🕊🍃
The activities I like to do to raise my serotonin are: -hanging out with friends (yes, that easy, do It's not as effective) -Learning a mundane new skill (like knotting, sewing, drawing, soldering, etc.) -Just learning a specific topic, like engines, electricity, magnetism, a new language, or many others. These are the ones I like and do the most, I don't know how well it can work for you
This is the video i needed. Holy fuck. Thank you. I have been embracing these negative emotions a lot more these past couple of years because they have become so overpowered that gaming was just exacerbating my anxieties. Im 27 now and the bit about how i feel like progress is slow struck a chord. I look around and I see folks my age buy homes, get married, and live life while I battle these demons caused by my many hours and years given to gaming. I’ve had to delete social media because my brain was so sensitive to negative comparisons that disrupted my peace. My social anxiety I believe stemmed from staying indoors for days on end all through high school, over the summers, and even in college when those should have been times to socialize, fail, and experience life. I try hard not to regret that period of my life because there is nothing i can do about it now. I do not want to live in the past. But progress is progress even if slow and i thank you for validating that chronic gamers have a late start. But who said it’s a quick, competitive race? No one. It’s almost childish to have to break things down to the most basic components but those little successes is what snowballs and builds momentum. You sir are doing the lord’s work. Gaming is only getting more addictive, realistic, and accessible. This is not talked about enough.
should people be pushy and nosy to get social? like really intrusive and annoying? if nobody invites me to parties, just walk in on people's parties? "hey, nice 4th of July BBQ ya got going," right? that is how it works right?
@@kuwaizairIf no one invites you, you can invite or find real friends. I am gamer (started at 9-10 now 17 (almost 18) and every day 8-24 hours per day playing video games, watching TV, etc.) and I am stuck. Literally when I invite someone of my old friends (from the age I was 7-14) to go outside to play games, etc. they just do not respond or does not accept my invite. I know that I am being ignored etc. but I also know that I need to find people who would accept me but because of social anxiety and depresion, I can not even get strength to do it. Sometime it feels better to stay in room for years than interect with people who does not accept you. To make my self more confident I started to workout at home before going to new school which has a lot of people (more than 100). It is low for most of people but for me this number is enought big to have a pnic attack ecen thinking about going to school. So workout helped a little bit. After getting more confident in new school I did not workout anymore. Now I started again because I really want to change but there is like only enemies around me. Next year I will have exams (I want to be accountant I know its hard work and need skills I do not have) 4: history, math, lietrature and IT. I do not know what to do...
Wow this is actually eye opening, I’ve been playing video games since I was 5 as it was the main way I could communicate with my family due to having autistic gibberish syndrome as I liked to call it 😂. I did not realise that video games were holding me back and it wasn’t just my autism, I thought they were helping and they are but it has it drawbacks and I hadnt realised. The way you explained it was just perfect for me to understand and the way you explained how to overcome it has actually gave me ideas on how to move forward so thank you.
I lost most of my teenage years playing video games, i was playing 10 hours a day sometimes more. I was stuck into an seemingly endless loop of missing oportunities, running from myself and life, and blaming somebody else for my misery. I let myself dragged along in life, doing an college i didn't necesarly choose because i was too busy playing video games to just sit and think abou what i want, where i want to be, how to be happy...isn't happiness the ultimate goal for everybody? Thankfully i woke up soon enough to not lose my 20's also. I hate giving advices in general but i will just say this: take CONTROL, sit in quiet let your mind and body relax, think about what you do, why you do it, and ALWAYS be honest with yourself, its the only person you should never ever lie to. You will fins your way out, i did, and i was pretty messed up. Now i'm in a good place, i still play video games from time to time, but it is me who controls when, not my sense of wanting to run away from it all. Good luck, may you find peace and happiness!
I mean, I'm on my 30s now, have a degree, married, have a job, have friends and most weekends I hang out with them, but I play a lot of games as well (mostly story or single player games). I feel these videos lean more towards people who just won't do anything besides playing, and I get that. I just wanted a video with the actual benefits of playing games on a regular basis.
It's not his fault that there are almost no benefits, besides the pleasure you get in the moment and MAYBE some inspiration (I'm an artist and I like drawing characters or landscapes from the games that I like)
I think he touched on the advantages of gaming before. For people who actually play multiple games in different genres, in general, get better at adapting/learning new stuff. But for specifics though, different genre give different advantages [here are some of my personal examples] Strategy games (Civilization/Starcraft) - handling multiple steps of planning and managing different resources - thinking of what the other enemy is thinking First Person Shooters (CS:GO) -spatial and temporal awareness (estimating where someone might be based from their initial location and the elapsed time after spotting them) -better spatial awareness for driving as well (corner checks = looking at side mirrors instinctively), stress management (not panicking when an enemy is shooting at you) - better communications skills (if you actually are trying instead of flaming as well xD) Third Person Shooter (Warframe) - 3D awareness and physics - Mathematical optimization (Modding...if you know you know Story Driven Games - Life lessons - Puzzle solving (sometimes) Racing Games - Grasp of car physics like turning, acceleration (sound of engine and how fast the car could), braking, and crashing into different objects RPG (Elden Ring) - Advanced mental map - Analysis during crisis (assessing the situation and looking for ways to overcome it despite the presence of fire-breathing dragons) - Detachment......
Yeah I feel like whenever anyone says gaming or gamer it's just referring to multi-player games, which I guess is fair for these type of videos since people who play those get more likely to get sucked in and have more of an unhealthy addiction
The difference here is those that get addicted and those that dont. Anyone can get addicted or obsessed with many things and these people are most likely those with mental issues. The fact that you are married have kids a stable job that allows free time to play means that your mental health is mostly likely better off. Im sure you have your hardships but you have a better support system and mental health to overcome it and not get addicted or obsessed with something. If you had some trauma depression bipolar or hell lonely with no support maybe youd get addicted to porn anime gaming gambling drinking drugs food you name it.
@@catasplurge1000 my bf NEVER plays mp games and yet gaming is still 100% of what he does after work (he's at home office, so he never leaves his PC basically). Like literally there are no other interests and hobbies. It's so shallow and sad to look at honestly. I also love games, but only very few ones and I still manage to do something else with my life
Nuance isn't really good when you're talking about science. What he is saying is pure fact, he's not giving his opinions. It's up to you to accept truth or not, but if you think you're more knowledgeable than thousands of neuroscientist who studies those subjets everyday for decades, then there is no point of talking about anything
I always struggled with gaining weight as a teen and even into my early 20s, I noticed every time I slowed/stopped playing video games regularly my weight got better. Playing video games had me ignore my hunger to the point where I don’t even notice it since I was so heavily into whatever game I’m playing. I’m 5’8 and have went from 120 pds as a teen to 135 as a 18 y/o when I stopped gaming. When I started again over the coarse of a year I dropped down to 127 and as a 24 y/o rose back up again to 147. This video really put things into perspective
Awesome! I couldn't give up gaming completely, personally - it's a part of my life I enjoy a lot. I have cut back a fair bit on the gaming though and have felt so much more confidence as of late with improving my life and situation 😊
I’ve been playing World of Warcraft on and off since I was 16 and am now in my mid-30’s. I met someone special, moved countries, and am job hunting. I find that amidst the stress, I often fantasize about what I’m going to do in the game. I’ll even google articles about the game while I’m riding in a car. I sometimes would rather game than do something fun with my partner. I’ve begun to wonder why I have these main goals, and have had them for years, but don’t accomplish them. I so appreciated this video. It contains a lot of empathy and empowering information. I thought there was something wrong with me, but it seems my brain is just rusty. Time to learn French, practice violin, and build an art business.
Personally I feel like the longer video games are around the better a lot of us will be at teaching our kids how to manage themselves better then we did through this mix of virtual and physical world.
Well put kind sir. We use that as a guide and help, and if a mistake is made in the virtual world its literally nothing. But in rl its difficult. Why should i add more words to your comment, its beautiful thinking the way it is, i meant .
when you say "virtual world" made me think of those fucking online life simulator game things everyone I know who played those 10-15 years ago or whatever is completely fucked in the head (I never did myself)
@@celshante1769 John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
@@juhis5936 John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
I had the opposite... I wasn't taught much of anything by my dad that built up my sense of capability, so I used video games as a crutch to exercise some kind of management and problem solving. So, I definitely was feeling my negative emotions, but also totally disconnected and disassociated. It was/is a weird hybrid. This makes it really easy to understand the upside-down disconnect of the serotonin behaviors and why the last few months I've been reconnecting to my actual anger, because I'm doing difficult things that aren't that pleasurable, but do enhance my overall trajectory in life. Definitely on this path. Been gaming since I was 3. Yep, 3. 33 years. I still do, but am much less reliant on them as a crutch, and I'm able to savor a fun game whilst playing less often. It's more satisfying that way.
Well, I’ve definitely been feeling off lately and this was good to see. Ive pretty much been gaming my whole life so it almost feels like part of my identity. Knowing this makes me feel stuck, I’d be so much better had I never gotten into gaming. I just really don’t want to be a gamer anymore but I don’t really know of life for myself outside of it, it’s just so deeply ingrained in my life from childhood. I’m about to be 25 and it feels like if I don’t stop now I’m not going to find true happiness and meaningfulness. As much as I love games, after watching this I think I wish I was never a gamer
You don't have to stop (at least not immediately), dr k in this vid doesn't necessarily say you have to stop. Just do what this vid says, start doing things that your life needs and be able to sit with uncomfy feelings those things cause
It’s not like gaming is the only source of this behaviour. It’s any addictive thing. If it’s reading fantasy, or running, or dancing… it’s still a problem. I urge you to not beat yourself up about gaming, and instead be vigilant about anything in your life that you might do in an addictive way.
What helped me was finding an easily accessible, cheap hobby. The gym required little. I also crochet while I watch youtube and the hooks and few types of yarn cost me 25 bucks. You can start today and make anything from a youtube tutorial.
Holy crap. I’ve been watching this channel for a long time and have always found helpful information, but this video feels like it broke barriers. I’d venture to say that this is the best video you’ve made to date. I gasped multiple times while watching because of how relatable yet groundbreaking this was. Thank you for doing what you do.
I feel like this applies to things like reading too, but to a lesser extent. With reading, as long as it's a difficult enough book from a linguistic and emotional level, you're more likely to face negative emotions. We all need some escapism after all. Plus it helps us reflect on our life.
This applies to basically anything dopamine inducing that can become an unhealthy addiction. For some people, that means needing to cut themselves off completely because that's what they need to be healthy. For others, it's a matter of developing a more healthy relationship to that thing by addressing the core issue which frees then to interact with the thing they enjoy in a more healthy way that doesn't negatively impact the rest of their life. Some things should be cut out (like drugs or porn), but I really don't think video games are one of those things that absolutely need to be cut out because there objectively are healthy ways of engaging with it as a single part of your larger life (same as reading, or whatever other innocuous hobby you have).
This video is definitely some good advice for most gamers. I was once forced to stop gaming for months and really noticed the difference in my mood and motivation when the serotonin worked properly again. I did go back to my old habits however to cope, but this can absolutely work for many gamers. I will say though, it probably depends on what kind of gamer you are. If you play games that give you challenges and make you think for yourself, operationalisation is probably less of a problem. If you play to become good enough to inspire others or just want to find friends that way or just maintain friendships it can probably supply a decent amount of serotonin as well. But if you're playing just to grind f.e. (since that's the easiest way to supply dopamine), this video 100% applies to you.
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Are there controlled studies on this? And how about TH-cam, Netflix binging, and sleep deprivation?
After exams I’d always be insanely sleep deprived and depressed. Probably not much learning going on.
@@edwardmitchell6581 You can apply the same logic to TH-cam and Netflix binging because its basically the same thing: externally dopaminergic rewards
Are there advantages about being a gamer or just disadvantages?
When you mentioned that with games we "stop learning", does it apply to games with any level of difficulty? Because one of the characteristics of hard games, whether the difficulty comes from how the devs made the game or playing VS a real person that is better than me, it often forces me to analyze my mistakes, learn from them and create new tactics and/or strategies.
Btw, I'm learning to program and I got the part about dividing tasks, that's a crucial part of coding and have to do that again and again.
I feel concerned that there are ads being added to the video, like it means that motivations are intrinsically changing.
As a gamer, my favorite thing about this is that not once did he tell me to stop playing video games.
I dont think thats something he would say given the channel name. But yeah feels good & it improves our trust in him (not triggering our subconscious-ego-self-defenses lol)
@@flk2441 Dr. K is still playing games himself, so :o And gaming is not inherently bad (and way better than watching TV all day, esp. if one also moves around if that's possible with/during the game).
@@Chizuru94 It is good in moderation, just like everything else in life. Too much gaming is bad, too much studying is bad etc.
For me it's Impossible to Stop playing Games since 2003 startet with ps1
@@Topsecretprivat it's not impossible. Although, if you want to keep playing videogames, that's fine 😁
Having had parents scold me for playing video games without giving me another option of what to do, this was incredibly refreshing to hear.
Yeah, I agree
Yeah... I've had a traumatising childhood which consisted having no good friends, ignorant strictive parents, abusive teachers. Games have given me an escape from the dark reality and they were just so fun... For a long while, until i was 18. Now I'm 21 and i stopped playing but i still feel that debuff on my brain
My parents literally just spoonfed me videogames and told me to go play and leave them alone. They had no energy or patience after both working 10+ hours a day. And I lived somewhere with no friends conveniently (or safely) nearby. And during a time when being a gamer and otaku was something to be ashamed of and kept hidden. All of which groomed me from a young age to self-isolate and play video games. And as someone with adhd (non-hyper just executive dysfunction), autism (high-functioning), and depression. Video games are just comfortable and familiar.
It sucks.
@@keldor8302 i hope the best for you :)
@@SyoDraws I hope the best for you too bro
Psychology is amazing. This guy just described half of my life's problems without ever having met me.
It helps he lived those problems.
thats true af
Right because as a species we all function in the same way but psychology has its weaknesses too because everyone’s brain runs on it’s own path meaning it would be almost quite inaccurate for lots of other people especially the neurologically divergent. There’s probably a ton of mental illnesses and disorders that remain undiscovered due to this same reason
because you have the same problems as everyone
The human is a system like any other. It is so great we live in a time when we can explore and document the human system, so we can help each other.
I am a daily gamer in my mid-50s now. Excelled in the Marine Corps. My memory and ability to adapt to things quickly could have been aided by some of the mind games I played. I had zero problems in the outside world. It needs done, I get up, get it done, and game once all the important things are done. Gaming is like a treat.
Yeah, i guess you used video games at his full potentiel benefits. Well done my dude=)
Listening to what he said in the video didn't make sense to me. I too served 8 years in the corps, was a gamer before, during, and after. I have a family, two beautiful intelligent daughters, and am only 32. I question his sources and statistics credibility. I know plenty of gamers who live fulfilled lives. Perhaps he's talking about the new generations. This I can understand because they've grown up on a screen.
I don't think he's talking about all gamers. In fact, I think he's talking about a niche of gamers. People who play A LOT of hours daily. Trust me, the people who he's talking to knows who they are. Most likely people who are not fulfilled at their jobs (or unemployed, or studying) and don't have children. Not necessarily younger gens, but definitely increased in younger gens.@@TheMadRooster09
I have been playing games since the late 70s. Even before we had computer games I would create fantasy games out of clay with my brother. The games were so complex we had a random generation for monsters and items which was a list over 300 where each item or monster ranged from level 1 thru level 8 or the very rare level 9. We eventually switched to computer games and we play a variety of computer games even today. So after 45 years I am a senior software engineer at a fortune 100 company earning almost three times as much as the combined income of the average family.
Where would I be today without computer games?? probably one of those fellas in an average family.
I think he’s not saying “All gamers will experience this and feel this way”
He makes several remarks throughout the video such as “if you feel this way then…”
So I believe he is addressing a common occurrence he has seen in his professional experience (as well as his own life) he is not necessarily saying everyone who games struggles with these issues, but If you DO, then here’s some info to help
There was a time when video games no longer made me feel good, the spark and hype was gone and my productive life suffered. I started to only play on weekends, like a video game fast and wow man, working hard and then relaxing on weekend afternoons playing Tears of the Kingdom feels glorious and productivity went up too.
I took the same concept with Weed. Weed always feels better to smoke on a weekend especially after a long week of work. Having to do it everyday starts to mess me up at work and my social life
@@Grandmaster_Vic I'm trying to quit rn, I'm currently 22 and I've been going overboard with edibles for a year or two. It's just been a depressive downwards spiral that nobody around me seems to get. So I want to quit and kill off that part of myself so I don't regress. No telling how jacked up it's made my brain.
@@Foogi9000 you needa figure out where the addiction comes from. Like it could be something lacking your life that you tryna fill a void for. I do recommend seeing a therapist or do some deep soul searching to help you figure it out
@@Therealbigsaya there was a time where I would smoke 2 to 4 joints a day. It was a bad period in my life. Once things were turning I find myself not doing it as much
@@Therealbigsaya appreciate it bro
For me it worked the opposite way. I had social anxiety and depression all my life and procrastinated a lot.
I was a gamer in my teens and then gave up. Just a few years ago I picked up that hobby again and the games inspired me to change my life.
I mostly play RPG's and i thought man, i want to be strong and brave as that characters and look cool as them.
I actively search for a therapist, I found a job, have more money now, started to reach out to my friends again and go to gaming conventions to meet new people. Also I started to workout, got a new haircut and overall I am happier.
Every day I first do all my tasks from my todo list and do something for my personal growth and the reward in the end is gaming.
Proud of you bro
@@midsizetea8181 Thanks bro. Trying my best.
+griffith
Yes! That's the way to do it! Particularly getting your chores or things to do, done early!
I'm trying to do this myself. I don't always succeed though!
Yeah games kept me out of trouble I use it for patience you don't always have the money to do what you want playing a game buys time till you can afford to do something, I also use it to think while I'm playing a game that some people consider boring it gives me time to think about the problems of the day and figure out something better the next day!
I can't reward myself by gaming (and I tried) because it way too comfy for me. I can't stop when I start. It's just the comfort...
I've been a gamer for over a decade, and before I clicked on the video, I was puzzled by the title. To my surprise, it accurately described my life: subconsciously playing games while ignoring negative emotions, struggling to break down large tasks from real life into smaller ones and complete them, and experiencing stagnation in life's progress. I deeply appreciate the perspectives the author has provided, the issues pointed out, and the advice given.
That is exactly why I don’t even go down that rabbit 🐇 hole 🕳️ of gaming since it will take over my whole life.
It depends. Gaming just like alcohol can be used by people in bad situations as a way to distract themselves from their life, only for it to become too much of a distraction and take over their life. It's all about self-control.
Games making you unable to turn large tasks into smaller ones might be a side effect of gaming taking so much time from your daily life that any skills the game doesn't "teaches" you (like turning large tasks into smaller ones, as well as a crap ton of social skills) you start to regress on. I don't want to sound like a devil's advocate, but some soulslike games actually help you learn how to turn large tasks into smaller ones, but then again they don't teach you other skills, so gaming of course should be controlled.
@@PraveenSrJ01 Alzheimer's patients are being told to play video games, memory games, and other brain games since it has an impressive impact on memory and cognition.
I've been playing video games every month since the age of 10... usually for multiple hours each day. So how has 40 years of playing video games impacted my life? Well today I'm a Senior Software Engineer earning big bucks, no health problems with a hot girlfriend for the last 10 years who earns even more money. I never could have started working at Microsoft if games did not inspire me to build my own personal computer providing me the first stepping stone into computers.
If you're someone who spends hours watching television each day or movies each weekend then you're doing less than someone playing video games each day. If you don't waste time watching television or watching movies then you're on a healthy path.
But compartmentalizing is what so many games do. They don't just give you everything the game has to offer at hour 1. You get them slowly over time. If anything, games really help you break down tasks to get you toward that end goal. So, I don't really understand how games specifically hindered that ability. I guess it also depends on what kind of games you play, your personality, learning aptitude etc. Blaming it all on videogames doesn't seem quite right.
@@NTJedi you make an excellent point and I wish you all the best and am happy for your success and your happiness
This video hit me like a thunderstruck.
I’m an addict gamer since my 14 years old (addict cause that’s all I do in my free time, I’m was easily above 20k hours of playing game).
Since I was 21 old I realized that gaming was not a good thing for me: “What I have gotten from the past 7 years? next to nothing… My life didn’t change that much, I have no friends, almost no memory of all the games I have played, no one to shares the memory of the games that I remember, no job, no qualification, no lover…“
I realize that all I have done in the past years was just escape my life... And I didn’t want that….
Now I’m 26 old it’s been 5 years that I want to quit gaming but couldn’t do it completely.
I completly stopped playing my favorite game since 5 years but it wasn’t enough.
I bounced from one addiction to another… Gaming then Facebook then TH-cam, then gaming again…
I managed to restrict a little bit of those urges and gain some time to do other things like swimming, reading or cooking…
But I still feel the urged to play / watching youtube time to time...
I still feel the need, from time to time, to divert my thought with something and not feel anxious with my life.
But why?
Why isn’t reading / cooking / swimming / meditate enough for me?
Why I NEED GAMING in my life to not feel bad?
And this guy just answer casually at this question.
19:50 “where is the exclamation point?” “what SHOULD I do?”
F*ck me.
For the first time in my life I realize that all my life I never asked myself “what I want to do?” but always “what SHOULD I do?”.
The world give me anxiety for this exact reason.
Nobody tell me what to do so I’m scared of picking the wrong choice, having "the bad ending".
I’m scare to pick any answer because I think about what people expect of me.
But people don’t tell me what to do… they don't care.
So I’m lost… I’m like the soldier that have missed his squad and is now all alone on the battlefield.
“What SHOULD I do? WHO I am supposed to listen?”
On gaming like on a battlefield you learn so hard to listen to someone else that you begin to fear to think by yourself!
You became addict to the authority and you seek someone to tell you what to do!
And when you are all by yourself you start to panic.
Wow, what a revelation! But now I was wondering how to manage my emotions…
And Boom! You hit me again with your wisdom dr K.
21:11 “just break your problem into 2… again and again”
This sentence had the effect off a thunderstruck for me….
“All the solution of all my problem can be found that easely… why I was worry at the first place?”
At this exact moment and for the first time in my life all the voice in my head stopped talking. It’s like all my anxiety was gone.
All my problems, that I could barely manage emotionally 20 minutes ago felled now so easy, I was not worry about them anymore.
It’s like for the first time in my life since my 12 years old I was back again in the present.
It’s like I just was seeing my bedroom, my head and hearing my voice for the first time.
It’s like I was not anymore a NPC watching the movie of his life waiting to receive the player… I was the player!
This sensation continue to follow me from this day, and I feel like now I don’t need to play anymore because I can now live with myself.
Thank you dr K.
You freed me from my head, now I feel I'm back in control and I will make sure to stay that way.
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Big fan of AC/DC are ya?
I'm 21 now and I'm at the same point you're at. I actually clicked on this video because I've been having a lot of panic attacks lately but I've gone through what you have as well. I started playing at 5 years old and it's been constant bouncing from addiction to addiction when I quit playing video games. I'm so happy I found this video, I hope you're doing well dude
I'm 46 and to an extent agree. Im at the age where I just don't care about the outside world anymore
So what you're saying is, you have anxiety, you practiced escapism for most of your life and then you blamed videogames? Yeha I don't think gaming is the problem here, the problem is that you're too anxious to do anything, and the solution for that, is to grow a pair and throw yourself out there. It'll go bad, it'll go well, but trust me that 90% of the times you'll barely be in control of it
@yasininn76 Wanting to change is difficult when you dont know what you want.
I was already aware that, somehow, the problem with my addiction came from me. I just could'nt undestand why I could'nt stop.
This video helped me realise 4 things:
1) My anxiety come from the fact I was not feeling in control over my life (thinking "what SOULD I do?" instead of "what CAN I do?" / "what I want to do?")
2) Video game are so addicting to me cause they tell me exactly what I should do to win, they help me divert my thought from my self
3) By the way I use it, vidéo games make me use to think less and less by and for myself causing me to having less and less control over my life then increasing the urge to escape from it and the need of someone (/something) to guide me.
4) The feeling that I was not in control over my life and that someone sould tell me what to do in order to improve IS A LIE, in fact I'm as capable as anybody to think by myself for a good solution to a problem. In fact i'm the only one capable of knowing what I want.
What Dr k helped me to do is for the first time vocalize thos feeling and undestand where their coming from.
Now I undestand the cycle.
Now I know if I dont change, nothing will change, and I will be "dead" all my life (ex : "The dark sad life of boogie2988")
Now I know my problem is how I'm seeing myself and the world arround me.
Now I know it's not an end in itself, I'm as capable as anybody to change.
NOW I WANT to change, because I KNOW I CAN do it.... and that's what I needed.
Everybody is different
As both a gamer and a programmer, the divide-and-conquer is built into my problem-solving mentality.
yep the game of life c'est la vie
Yeah, I'm still studying informatics but works pretty good so far. And if I don't know how to break down big tasks I just google it up or watch some videos and voilà. It's really funny how even being a fun person can be learned nowadays
@@akospapanitz8390 Honestly, wait until AI learns to be funny. 😆 We might be working on making demigods, if we're not careful.
I was just now years old when I first understood the actual meaning of the phrase “divide and conquer”
@@mirrorcube3709 Congrats for finding out! Most people have no idea what it really means, and it's being used against them. One lesson at a time, step by step, progress is progress. Good-enough is good enough.
The best thing about this episode is, he knows what it feels like to be a gamer. He can even use words that gamers use to explain things. It's freaking amazing.
We gotta practice what he teaches and be able to restrain. Everything in moderation my friends.
Of course. I hate it when people just tell you "just stop" to end all your problems, while this guy simplifies it to the point where you can watch paint dry and your problems go away.
yeah but i still want to know what "optimizing dps rotation" means
@@ProjctAce331 from what I understand, it’s usually in ability based games like overwatch or that final fantasy mmo where you have a bunch of abilities which get put on a cool down when used. The dps rotation is you using each of your abilities in a sequence. Obviously, then, optimizing the dps rotation is when you find the best sequence of abilities to maximize damage.
it all makes sense now@@potatolord9715
The realization popped into my head like midway. What he’s essentially saying is to learn how to fail. And when you learn or work at things that aren’t games, recognize that frustration and annoyance you feel is progression, and that your actually getting it and can do it. And that you will do it
And then you find that in many of the older games you learned a lot about coping with frustration and annoyance.
@@ArneBab Very true. Additionally, you would rent the difficult retro game and be stuck with it for three days. So you would have to "get good" over and over again.
You can also learn this by playing Souls games
@@GuyFromJupiter yeah i learned this by playing cuphead and geometry dash xd, but seriously tho, i feel like he talked a lot more for a specific type of gamers rather than all, i mean i always do everything i ahve to for a day, like studying and all that and than play games, cuz imo all that he said can apply (if not more) to social media like yt shorts and tiktork, instagram...
And now you just described why difficult games got my child brain hooked on the feeling of satisfaction of overcoming/understanding difficult/stressful things. Still very useful now. I'm in my 30s, 'been playing since I was 7-8. I decided to own a boat and become a liveabord in the next 10 years. Do I know anything about boat engineering? No. Am I aware I'll have to learn a ton of vastly different skills, including motor repairs, charting, plumbing, electrics, etc? Yes. Does that dissuade me? No, not even a little. Not knowing things doesn't scare me. Not allowing myself to learn and repeatedly doing the same thing, becoming stagnant, does. You want to do it? Then throw yourself at it.
While watching this video I was encouraged to go outside and enjoy nature for a bit while I listened to it. Afterwards I took your advice and sat with my emotions.
I'm shocked at how well this worked because within about an hour or two I felt encouraged to begin job searching. I'm not quite ready to give up gaming as a whole because it's a hobby I enjoy and it provides my friends and I with something to do together, but I can see now how stepping away from it and not suppressing your negative emotions can motivate us to be productive.
Hey man, its been two months. How's the search? You land something or an interview?
I was crippled by gaming at one point, i think i still am. Cuz im here. But i wana know if you got to follow thru with this comment. Im gonna go stare at a wall i guess and see if it helps lol.
@@ChronicSkooma hey dude I was crippled by gaming even though I don’t play video games anymore I still get that overwhelming urge to play that gets triggered by me simply watching someone else play. For me gaming was a hobby but eventually turned into a coping mechanism.
@@HarpalMalhi-pn3to We don’t grow in our comfort zone. That’s my motivation. A flower rarely grows in the dark. It needs exposed to the elements, feel the harsh rain a d the hot sun. When we sit at stare at a screen we rarely grow.
I fill my time with extra work I cannot ignore. I got a second job and I’m part of a nonprofit organization that helps veterans heal. A lack of free time will eat up my time I used to spend on a computer. I still game, but I pick games I can put down at a moments notice. (Dont play league of legends, try Kenshi.) multiplayer games caused me to have an emotional investment in the outcome of hours long frustrations. Spending 10 hours a day doing something and having nothing to show for it except rage really ruins your life.
I turned my vices into helping others with vices. Maybe look into filling your free time with commitments you can’t back down from, force yourself to not think about gaming ya know? Just my two cents.
This was really depressing. I turned to video games as an escape because my life has so much trauma in it. I feel as if I was born with nothing good or no good advantages. It seems like a lot of work needs to be done to get some good in my life, and it feels like there needs to be very little for something bad to happen. In the video game, I feel happy instantly and I can forget how badly my life sucks.
Step 1 for me was realizing that saying I have 0 skills is giving up. You won’t develop any if you never try. No one will believe in you unless you do first.
Your comment is well typed and understandable, many people aren’t even capable of that much.
goodluck in life brother
What has started to help me is to remember that, every time I get an urge to play, my life will be there, waiting in exactly the same state I left it in, once I close the game. Always.
@@TheMeowse beautiful
Most people are born with No advantages over another person yes their is social political and monetary. don’t feel bad that you aren’t what you can become.
I am currently in deep shit because of my bad video game habits. I'm glad to have found this video. I'm glad to find someone who understands how I think and feel about my situation. Tysm, I learned a lot today
how’s the progress going?👍
Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today.
If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤
@@yaz8165 Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today.
If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤😊
@@clashofaction249 Here’s something that can change your way of life or thinking. This is the most important thing you will hear/read today.
If you’ve told one lie, stolen anything, or lusted (which is adultery of the heart), you’ll be found guilty on Judgment Day and end up in Hell. But there’s good news: Though we broke God’s Law, Jesus, the prophesied Messiah, perfectly kept the Law, fulfilling all righteousness. He paid the fine for sinners ( that we could never pay ) by suffering and dying on the cross-absorbing the wrath of God that we deserve. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.” Then Jesus rose from the dead and was seen by hundreds of eyewitnesses. Today, repent and trust Jesus; God will grant you forgiveness and the gift of eternal life. God bless ❤❤ 😊
I didn’t play games for 11 years and was socially successful. I ended up feeling annoyed with life. All of my different friend groups always had problems and drama. Now I play games, exercise and eat healthy. My life has never been more peaceful and rewarding.
everyone is peculiar and all this guy try to do is generalize everyone and everything into 1 single group, which is a very miserable approach and very unscientific.
@@MrEliasQueiroga people like you should mind their own businesses, if someone's happy with gaming it's okay, if you can't enjoy a simple video game it's your issue not ours
@alayctv5342 what? I was talking about the owner of the video, not the guy who posted. You misinterpreted what I said dude. I love video games.
@@MrEliasQueiroga my bad brother, sorry
I find it interesting that you said "it feels like life is passing you by"
As a mature student back in university, this is how I feel. I know that my end goal is good, but being in university feels like the world is passing me by.
We’re in this with you ❤
I'm 42 and this is absolutely me. I feel like if I don't have step by step instructions I become paralyzed. School contributed to this. I never had to think about anything in school. I didn't have to study, I never did my homework and still passed. Even won awards in highschool. But the moment I left I had no idea what to do and I've flopped around like a dying fish for the twenty-ish years since.
I never considered how much games probably contributed to this. I started when I was 4. My son was even younger. I'm worried at how much like me he is.
I have to disagree with that mindset though because plenty of well made games encourages the player to try again and ignore failure (which reflects the real world, one failure is not the end of everything).
And usually there is more than 1 way or option to clear a game, which means problem solving skills. Learnt more from gaming about that than 14 years of school ever will.
I'm like you in that school setting, I studied for 5 minutes just to refresh and got 90/100, "that's great, more time for gaming" always top 2 or 3 in class, now at 25 I feel that severe lack in serotonin as I can't lift up my business, hell, even I don't know what I want to do for a living
@@Andmau2552 you're young, you don't have to *know* exactly what you are doing, either try stuff from your course of study or branch out abit, read around, get skills or something, explore your options.
too often teachers and parents mistakenly believe a person at 14-16 should know their course in life when no way someone so young would have the wisdom to do so. middle age career changes and all that are more common than led to believe.
Also not everyone likes or love their work, some people just choose one they can tolerate and live the life they want outside of work.
It’s your son but personally I wish I knew all the values of gaming but also be checked if I’m alright in other areas
You should play more non-linear games like latest zelda, minecraft or baba is you, just to give a few examples.
You can apply this to any sort of escaping reality type of thing, like watching movies or series, sports and so forth. Because mainly without the hobbies we have life becomes very plain. Work eat sleep repeat. Without any hobbies we are all bound to be depressed. It is all about balance, to much of anything is bound to harm us in some way in the long run.
Exactly, excessively doing anything and neglecting yourself is never going to be beneficial. This video is very much like Star Signs or having your fortune read; throw a load of shit and see what sticks. It's much more likely that people predisposed to these problems find solace in gaming, not that it causes them. But if Dr K would like to publish his peer reviewed research to say the opposite then I'll happily change my mind.
Yes and no. It depends on the hobby. Spending many hours a day playing an instrument is what it takes to reach a good level. Doing intense sports too is very beneficial for the body akd the mind. Cooking, sewing, writing, painting, woodworking... If you spend your free hours doing those kind of things, the upsides simply not comparable to gaming or tv... The fact is, some hobbies definitely are superior to others. The key is to learn to find auch educational hobbies amusing enough to replace gaming amd tv with, say, going for a hike, learning an instrument, or anything new for that sake.
@@richardf.6430 There is no such thing as a "superior hobby"
@@richardf.6430 It depends on the type of gaming, video games are a sport too. I agree that some hobbies are more beneficial than others, but in this case, gaming has bad things like everything else, but also good things, develops mental abilities, pattern recognition, learning new languages, etc. It depends on what you play, it is not the same to play something that you only have to press a button to play something that you have to create strategies, overcome challenges, etc. Can not generalize.
@@justl30b the way I engage with video games has definitely caused me to develop cognitive and spatial skills that I never would have otherwise , but at the same time I know people who engage with video games in a way that really doesn’t accomplish anything besides triggering the reward center for pressing buttons
I'm not a (heavy) gamer, but I needed to hear that serotonin vs dopamine explanation. I've been depressed for several years, but sometimes I (or others) question whether that's even true because I do have small happy moments. Like feeling miserable all day, but then enjoying ice cream for 5 minutes. Your explanation makes so much sense. I refuse to be gaslit any longer! I will use this new knowledge to defend myself!!
He also has a video where he mentions that a clinical depression should take about over year to recover in normal conditions but external elements such alcohol or gaming can affect the normal cycle and throw the person in longer states of depression.
I mean to be fair not always is depression a person feeling that way 24/7. It doesn't mean your unable to ever have happy moments throughout your day. Its not so simple as being unable to ever be happy.
@@MonochromeMemories very important point.
depression has been around long before video games. wasn't there a time in Germany world war 2 called the great depression?
@@StephenHopkinsVaults The Great Depression refers to the economic state of many countries experienced. I think this happened during the years post-WW1 up until USA got heavily involved in WW2.
this was eye-opening!
Next video when???
I didn't expect you here at all
real
Yo how did u get here
Tbh, what he says sounds like truth on the surface, but in actuality, it's very shallow. Decades of studies show the very opposite effect. People who play video games have a better ability in learning and problem solving. But it s true that not all games are made equal. Games that promote cooperation between players, puzzle solving, or very complicated mechanics are superior to mindless games in matter of benefits to the brain. Studies have also shown that effects on mental health are minimal, but if abused to escape real-world problems, they do the same thing as any other drug. Personally, there is also the mindset in regard to your approach to life in general. As his example says , feeling good because he beat the river, or because you achieved that or that, that works as long as your mentality says that those achievements realy matter, if you wanna use them to impress people, get a mate or something. But if you re like me, for example, and just do stuff for the sake of having fun, and not to get achievements, no experiment with life and not keep a monotone routine, well the entire premise of the video falls. I'm just saying.
the funny thing is I was born with ADHD and the certain quirks that I had pretty much fit neatly into each of these categories one after another. every shortcoming I have experienced, you have described an answer to. I never really played video games enough to change my brain chemistry like you were talking about, like literally less than 2 hours a week, and despite that, you've given me a perfect template to overcome my independent problems. it kinda felt like being handed the wrong pieces to a puzzle, but finding a way to make them fit inside the puzzle of my own head.
As a person who also has ADHD, Video Games is just a distraction for me, i've learn to control myself in the hyperactivity matter and video games calm me down, in some way. thought, im not addicted to them either. i played like 5 hours per week, mostly in a span of 2-4 days. And most of the categories that are talked about in the video also fit with some quirks i had
My ADHD on the other hand made me dependent on stimulants and drugs. I live for a surge of Adrenaline and it has begun to disrupt my sleeping patterns even though I work out 4 times a week, eat a healty diet and have a job and get a lot of supplements. I found that I use things like Ritalin, or other meth drugs prescribed for ADHD or Caffeine or gaming at nights a lot to stay alert all the time and also boost my morale up. When I take none of these substances for a day, I feel there is no point to living. I still do my tasks somewhat but I cannot understand the motif. I cannot understand why I wanted to do them or why I had those plans or why I'm even alive. On the other hand when I indulge in them every day, it takes that feeling of empty but it supresses my sleep hormone reproduction (melatonin) and causes a considerable level of stress in my body and It's very troublesome to have to go the gym restless. It slows down my progress too. I'm surprised i'm still building muscle to be honest.
Yea this sounds like ADHD not an issue with gaming
@@corwyncalc4329 Exactly. And gaming addiction (and sometimes some other issues that have much deeper roots than just adhd, addiction or games). Which is rare amongst gamers. To me it has felt like Doctor K initially always praised video games as good for the brain, as science has always demonstrated, but in the recent couple months/years has capitalized more and more on an audience that related to ADHD and gaming (rather than any mental health like he used to, as a gamer who is for gamers, not against them, but that's what people want now, something to blame, and the easiest thing is video games especially when a lot of his audience with ADHD can relate to the issues he describes, and questionable self-help rethorics are more popular than ever and often demonize gaming), and has been talking excessively about all those absolutely incredibly negative effects gaming now has. He has increasingly made it seem like gaming is a much more widespread and severe issue than it actually is, and it's starting to feel kind of dishonest (even if i don't doubt gaming has those effects on the brain to some extent, and can be devastating for those who are addicted) as if it's more to appeal to an audience than to actually try to help explain and solve mental health issues, to help grow the channel or sell ADHD books. Which i admit would be pretty surprising coming from him, but you never know for sure what a content creator is thinking.
I wonder what is actually going on, but something feels off about it. Has our science been wrong all along and making a complete 180° on gaming and all the benefits for cognitive functions, mental health, stress relief, memory, problem solving that they supposedly had, yet is all being backtracked on in the polar opposite direction? But it seems like it would be something that conservatives would push to demonize games as they've always done, yet Doctor K is absolutely not like that, so it makes me wonder how reliable his sources are, even if i trust his ability to be able to find legitimate studies. So what then, is the answer that this is just relevant to a specific subset of video games and susceptible players which make up a minority of them, but have more predatory game loop models, such as some of the biggest AAA games and mobile games? I could definitely see that be a thing, but that would make the way Doctor K has been sensationalizing it disingenuous. I've been wondering if anyone has been noticing this or felt this way.
Of course, the videos and the lessons that you can learn from them are still very much universally valuable. I'm not dissing that.
One difference: ADHD can stay forever
3 years ago my dad asked me what was the most hours I had in any game.
DOTA2, 3784 hours I replied.
My dad then says, Imagine if you had that many hours in your other life passions
So I persued 3784 hours of real life.
Thanks dad ❤
I got 10k hours. I hate it. I'm actually glad to hear you escaped this path, my dude.
@@MegaMikeZero for the past couple years i’ve gotten at least 1,200 hours each year on League, just stopped playing last year
what did you end up pursuing?
@@MegaMikeZero Got about 17k hrs on WoW. And I did start playing it in the end of 2012. Before that about 10k hrs in Call of Duty 1+2(didn't like the newer ones). Then there's a lot other games like 4k in cs:go about 2000 in LoL Just end of last year I quit due to some health problems I got. Now I play maybe 5-8 hrs a week at most some casual games. Dota I only have about 600 hrs also starting from 2013 but that game never stuck to me. I'm just bad in Mobas and only good in FPS Games or MMOPRGS. In LoL I also still suck it was only a side game to WoW. So I put those 2k hrs in in a matter of like 6 years. With that little time commitment you can't really get good.
@@williehrmann what the actual fuck... that is a diagnose
This guy is incredible. The amount of empathy and intelligence behind this video is 10/10. Ty for this
0:16: 🎮 The video discusses the impact of years or decades of gaming on the brain.
3:38: 🎮 The imbalance of dopamine and serotonin in gamers leads to a lack of confidence and difficulty in engaging in the real world.
7:17: 🎮 Engaging in challenging activities that lead to a sense of contentment can help gamers overcome serotonergic aversion.
10:57: 🧠 The video discusses the role of serotonin in treating panic attacks and trauma-related hyper vigilance.
14:36: 💔 Betrayal in marriage can have a lasting impact on trust, similar to the effect of video games on shutting off negative emotions.
18:10: 🎮 Video games provide too much guidance and prevent gamers from developing problem-solving skills in real life.
21:42: 📝 The video discusses the process of breaking down the task of finding a job into smaller, manageable pieces.
Recap by Tammy AI
Ah yes. A true giga-chad I see.
I have been gaming for 32 years, and I have not experienced any of this. Course I have a very traumatic childhood and games help me mentally. Course I do this all in moderation. I also have insomnia due to CPTSD, and gaming puts my mind to rest so I can get back to sleep. So my case is unique to me as I don't know anyone else like me at all.
I should also note that I only play games on their hardest difficulty.
@@gamervet4760 I think his target subject is probably chronic gamer, those that do it with no moderation, since you only do it in moderation, that's probably why.
@@GenjiPrime Fair point. Not everyone goes to therapy for stuff.
Thank you for this
Despite gaming taking a good portion of my free time, and being a huge part of my childhood, I believe it has given me the ability to learn things extremely quickly. Playing a very large selection of different games throughout my life has strengthened my ability to grasp concepts much quicker.
Exactly, thats the true affects on the brain problem solving ability. Without gaming i would not be as successfull as i am today. I also always say to my employer to pick the lazy person over the overconfident person. Lazy people will always find a way to solve a big problem with the minimal work necessary.
This video may apply to some people but not the most people.
Similar for me. But also, I think one of the most significant challenges I faced in my childhood was severe anger issues; one of the big things that helped me overcome that was Dark Souls. Fighting Artorias was challenging, it took many attempts to eventually succeed - but it was too awesome to get angry at, so these repeated failures didn't get to me that much. That taught me how to face adversity without frustration, and it taught me to *enjoy* overcoming adversity (taught me to get serotonin from it - some genres of games are actually good for that!), which helps with taking more initiative in my life.
(Then this was pushed a lot further more recently by mental health crises last year...but while living through those helped make me stronger, I still had to be strong enough *to live through them in the first place* - and while there are of course other factors, games like Dark Souls certainly helped me get to that point.)
Yes, gaming gives us skills, but unfortunately at the same time, it gives us elementary debuffs that hinder us from doing and applying those skills. Motivation, procrastination, energy management.
Literally with everything in the digital world I noticed that there are both upsides and downsides to it. Managing the downsides is so hard, oof. But it seems to be the key to be learned towards a successful life.
Our generation requires so much mental control. We have to be hyper-aware, what the digital media does to us internally, and combat that. I think it's as hard as opium, cocaine and other hard drugs. It's just soooo easy to get lost in it. Lost in a way, that we become externally controlled, we lose control to decide on our own, what we want to do now.
I wish everyone the absolute best on that path towards learning to tackle it. I walk with you.
@@IroAppe Fair point about everything having upsides and downsides, but I think even that is a bit too much of a generalisation. Personally, I actually find that I feel *more* motivated and procrastinate *less* in months where I play games more. It just comes naturally for me to play a game like Elden Ring or Crusader Kings 3 for maybe a couple of hours, and let the "momentum" of the resulting feelings carry me through more significant goals. (Plus in Elden Ring's case, it helps teach perseverance. It's easier to keep functioning through even the lowest moods if I'm used to facing adversity.)
As a way to track it, even; I write poems and short stories. The absolute minimum I write being one poem every 4 days - and in most months, that's the norm for me.
But in months like this where I've spent more time playing games...I've *also* written a short story (which took about 3 hours of writing) *and* am ahead of schedule on my poetry, even while dealing with worse circumstances at home than I usually would.
(Now to play devil's advocate, maybe that correlation is not from causation. Maybe I'm playing games more *because* I feel more motivated for some unknown other reason, instead? But either way, it shows that gaming hasn't been harmful in my case)
Well at least for me without my interest in gaming i would never had an interest in PC's and would probably today not work in the space sector firing up satellites. And you would probably say im a extreme case with my sometimes 40-60h gaming per week when i have nothing better to do. Not everone is same not everyone get negativly effected and i would assume there are other negative influences in the past which causes a "problem" with gaming since you will use it as a Exit door and not out of fun@@IroAppe
I had the gamer trait before it was gaming. I read fantasy obsessively from I was 8-16 yo. I now realise that it fulfilled all the same purposes for me and penaltied me the same way, as described here.
Yeah, I would've liked a bit of that in the video as well.
Can relate.
Yeah exactly the same I think that was 1 part of the video that I would have liked him to expand upon more. People use all kinds of substances and activities to avoid pain and I agree with the premise of how we use these things to avoid our internal negative emotion. However, I'm not sure I agree with the premise that, "before video games when we felt lonely we'd seek other human connection" as people have coped with loneliness in a myriad of other, much more, unhealthy ways long before video games existed (binge eating, drinking, smoking, self destruction). While I feel like gaming likely has unique characteristics that effect the brain differently I think the root of the issue runs deeper. And much like everything gaming, if done in moderation, is likely a net positive on one's life. I know it's the only way that I can still connect with friends and family who live thousands of miles away multiple times a week. The social benefits of gaming I feel are vastly uncommented upon in most modern "gaming health" debates.
@@PaulsonAustin Yes! Very nicely worded!
@@PaulsonAustin I think the point is just to clearly illustrate the function that gaming plays in our lives, especially for people who haven't even thought about it this way before. Of course there have been all sorts of avoidance behaviours and addictions in existence for centuries, and maybe he could have mentioned that, but this video is specifically aimed at gamers, and even more specifically at gamers who may not be super aware of this stuff.
I initially got defensive but I realised this is for those who are going through a severe addiction - and with addiction, its important to keep it in check and find balance
Thing is most of the time you're not aware you're addicted to something. Heavy addiction can look quite normal to the addicted brain. A lot of addicted people (myself included) look at people with an addiction and say "thank god i'm not addicted like that person", while being EXACTLY as addicted as that person. Not saying it as a fact, because i don't know you, but if your first reaction was to get defensive, maybe there is a reason for that.
God sent His ONLY SON to die for us on the cross so that we can get into Heaven even though we sin
PLEASE search for God and you WILL truly find Him
@@HareK0nnen I admire your insight, thanks for taking the time to give your input. My defensiveness more so came from experience of seeing people, myself included, shunned for enjoying video games as a side-hobby. I should keep that insecurity in check.
As a gamer with ADHD, i used videogames to help encourage me to do different tasks that i couldnt necessarily do. they were like my reward for doing daily activities. Working out along side that helped to boost my confidence out and about, and talking about videogames is one of the things i am passionate about. My students love it when i bring up videogame references in class too which helps get everyone motivated! it i guess it has a knock on effect
That must be such a cool feeling when you drop the video game reference and see the flash of recognition of their faces, and it totally lands
A lot of these points don't apply to me, but I see how they can affect others. The important thing is to find a way to moderate gaming and fill something productive in such as exercise, language learning, building/construction, farming, etc.
Serotonin is produced by absorbing sunlight and doing activities that are engaging + challenging + productive. Youll sleep better for it, too.
You dont have to give up gaming... but don't use it to give up everything else.
You should Achieve before Rewarding yourself...
Agreed, I live a normal life, hang out with friends, hold a stable job in hr, and I spend my free time gaming. My friends are the same and we talk about games, work, dnd, all while bowling. Then we go home and hop on ffxiv.
Ya I feel bad that people get sucked into a cycle like this. It is a bit shocking to hear.
@@VitalityForGamers thee best advice, it is like you hunt then you eat
I'm a person who has been gaming pretty much my entire life and since I was young, it felt like when I tried to do something, I always had to struggle with things like procrastination and determination; I could start on something but then at the third day or so I'd quit. It felt like I couldn't control my life. I found myself always going back to games when I felt disappointed, and never actually addressed my negative emotions either.
After watching this video I learned why all of this was happening... I'm relieved there are solutions to these problems, as I'm tired of being hold back by my own self when I want to achieve my dreams. I will commit to doing the things you mentioned in this video. Here's to a new start in life.
1. Engage in serotinergic activities
2. Learn to tolerate negative feelings
3. Break down tasks in two
You got this. I believe in you! Be patient with yourself as you learn. Trust your instincts. Wishing you well on your journey! 😊
That's awesome to read. The first step is to be aware that you are the one holding you back, and you definitely did. Stay strong when times gets hard. Good luck with your journey my friend !
I feel ya Bro, I too have been feeling like you my entire life and FINALLY I've found something that pretty much describes what I need to do. Hope we can achieve it.
I'm I lot older, I really did not get into gaming alot until my early thirties. So for me gaming is a hobby, I still did and do a lot of the every day things in life, but I would say that gaming does make me procrastinate a little more. Im socially awkward and don't like all the BS people do to each other, so I did retreat at times from social interactions (work was never an issue) to being alone even before I was a gamer, yet still have friends and forced myself to engage in social activities. The thing I see in gaming though is its a lot like life. There is a starting place, the place you are at now and the quest or goal, there are rules in life that you have to know to get to the goal, and there are thing to do in the real world to buff your real world stats to make you better at reaching your goals, like exercising, learning, working (making money), ect. You actually have to keep a lot of things in your head when you game to do well and that's true in life as well. So you might want to try to look at life as you look at a game and systematically break down what you want in life and how to get to your goals, then set a schedule in your life to get those things done in the real world. Here is the thing though, life is a long game and the only one that really counts, it takes time to get where you want to go, there are set backs and you will fail sometimes, that's ok everyone else does too. But if you keep working at moving forward in life you will see progress in time, be patient and work hard at it. You cant really escape your life, your always there, your always you, ignoring that will catch up to you one day. Treat yourself well, its amazing how so many of us treat ourselves in ways we would never treat someone we love,, so as Jorden Peterson says treat yourself like you would treat someone you love, do the same things for yourself as you would do for someone you love to have a better life.
damn that sucks for you I realized this back in 7th grade lol
What some people in this comment section don't get is he's not attacking gamers, he's a gamer himself, he's just stating objective facts to help people understand where their problems MAY come from, of course gaming has positive aspects, videogames are a form of art afterall, but the point of the video is to underline the negative ones (which sadly are the majority) to help people overcome the consequences of those negative aspects.
Does he still play occasionally? Which games?
And yes the amount of copium will be astronomical in these comments
@@Li_Tobler I don't know to be honest but I hear him talking occasionally about different games, and he knows Dark Souls lore so I guess he played it
@@gabrieletolomeo7497 thanks! I looked at his Twitch and only saw "just chatting" and dota 2, so I thought someone might know more 😅
Especially I’m todays current industry which has literal psychologists on their team to do whatever they can to addict as many players as they can. It’s becoming a fucked industry
If he wants to make the video about the negative aspects of gaming thats fine. But dont make your caption say: "how years of gaming affects your brain" cause thats really not what he's talking about. He is literally talking about addiction and even starts out saying "being a gamer is living life on hard mode" like really bro?? And to say he is a gamer?? Lol when was the last time he actually streamed a game? All his videos in yt arent about him being a gamer but rather talking about the health aspects of having this lifestyle which is fine but dont go and make this video with the misleading captions and thumbnail and then just literally talk about addiction. I would have been fine if he had a caption that said "gaming and addiction" or something along those lines because in this video he literally associates gamers as addicts. (Gamers=addicts) which is obviously false. I was looking forward to watching a video about how gaming affects the brain because thats what the caption was saying. Instead I watched an addiction lecture with gaming as the drug and the gamer as the drug addict. Idk man it feels like theres an agenda behind this more than anything. I feel like i wasted my time watching this video because the captions and thumbnail literally mislead me. I would think he did that for the views but whatever. Im done and unsubbing from this guy.
This video only explained everything about myself from childhood to teenage years. I’ve been struggling from my youngest years with emotions because I lived it rough. I would play video games to make me forget all of my negative emotions without facing them. This video made me cry, it’s free and very useful therapy. Thank you for explaining and enlightening the problems, i’ll be forever thankful
I’m 33 and this video has described my life so accurately. Over the past year I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and anxiety and I’ve been trying to do a lot of work feel better. This includes playing less games, therapy, doing more stuff outside, and ADHD and depression meds. It’s changed my life.
great to hear!
Guys I have ADHD I have ADHD
-Every sad US citizens these days
@@molikeur it’s because insurance companies won’t pay for therapy unless the clients is diagnosed with something
@@EZMotion101 Makes sense, thanks for that
@@molikeur also its because alot of people who had ADHD in the past just slipped under the radar and lived a life of difficulty, there isn't an epidemic of cases, there's a realisation..
18:19 I'm 26 yrs old and still don't have a license and Dr. K's explanation about not knowing what to do because i dont have an organic UI built into my eyes showing me quest markers was so spot on lol we have to make our own quest markers. We're the developers for our own lives.
Real life is comparable to video games. You won't level up without the experience.
@@kimhornhem5399 That's so true. And the only way to get experience is to grind, with the occasional kick ass quest line.
I just turned 26 and I also don’t have a license lol
It's such a good thing to have a person who truly understands you, who "have been there before" and knows what he's talking about. This channel can really help those who need it. I guess, I was lucky. I came up with those ideas about "bad thoughts", "small steps" and "easy hard work" almost alone. Buta reminder is always a good thing
I have been a gamer all my life but since 7th grade I had to be aware of my mental status. I adopted some of the techniques you mentioned today by chance throughout my life. The staring at a wall thing definitely is something I do sometimes for up to an hour. This last year operationalization with my problems helped. They problems don't seem as big as they once were and progress albeit small is still progress.
This is one of your most life changing videos that you have ever put out. almost every single one of your viewers struggles with this issue and you just laid out the most understandable road map to self improvement. you deserve the world my friend ❤
100% agree
Trueee
i have found that going to the gym, playing games mainly only with friends online, and tracking my nutrition have kept me pretty well in-check as someone who plays video-games a lot. Having a job also helps because it indirectly takes time off the game without you having to force yourself since you’re going to have to go to work regardless. This is great because you’re doing hard work while you earn money for your time.
I started crying watching this... I cant believe i found someone who explains my own feelings to me. Thank you
John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
Cringe
never cry or tell others you cry, be positive, and dont show weakness.
@@azaxYyYyYbro forgot he’s a human
@@azaxYyYyYTake care of youre emotions. Youre the only one they have
i feel so called out in this video. honestly, almost all of those experiences that was mentioned here feels so relatable. i was playing video games since i was 5 (i'm 27 now) and i don't think i even have a proper break in between those years (like i always have video games to play as far as i remember in my life).
thank you HealthyGamerGG team for making and publishing this video, it really helps me understand the problem in my brain and the possible solution to it. i hope soon i can start change my behavior to a better one with some of your advices and start solving the problem myself :)
I am part of the community, but I am also kind of old (millenial) and have a young teen son.
This video made me understand a lot about him and his gaming, as well as why I struggle to help him to be motivated to do anything but gaming.
And I am not talking about going to ban gaming or being online. That's just silly. I literally mean: Being able to help him appreciate life more and be interested in it.
I have 4 sons, I game with all of them, honestly the best way I've found to get them to appreciate, work, and aim themselves at a goal is to believe they can, communicate that I expect things of them, validate their dreams when they tell me.
Dr. K is describing my father to a T, and one thing my father never did for me was believe in me or himself.
maybe engaging with him in his gaming then offering an activity that you want to do so it can feel like a bonding experience.
I’m 23, and this is one of the BEST videos on the internet.
Not only is it revolutionary in terms of neuroscience, but in conveying information too.
As if nothing was barred or hidden, as deeply opposed to someone sharing an idea with a competitor or rival, to hide as much information as they can from others so that they retain an edge of knowledge.
This video truly grasps the concept of giving and sharing information, almost like that of what describes;
An Act of True Love.
Dr K., you set an exemplary figure that I am highly, and fondly grateful for.
Man, this video hits like a truck. For someone who's been abused and bullied both physically and psychologically by my parents and classmates basically all my life, gaming is all I ever had to keep me going and I probably wouldn't be here without it, but I can see its effects on me now. I probably won't ever stop gaming as that's not the point of the video and also because it's a core part of me at this point, but I'll definitely sit down and think a lot on this. Thank you for opening my eyes, I appreciate it.
Agreed
What happens to a business man that work all day and doesn't have time to do what he loves, is the same for a gamer that forgets take car other parts of life, at the end you will be unhappy. You must have time to do what you love, in this case playing videogames, there is no point of deny that, but it can easily become a vice, and this can literally can make you a mess even ruin your life. Be conscient of what you do with your time and how affects your body and mind. What the video says is scarily true.
@ivailok3376 you perfectly described my life w ur comment lol
I hope you feel happier in your life one day knowing that your still here and you haven’t given up!
I am a very strange Gamer...
I completed 3 university degrees, was popular and voted in president of the ASEAN club and SRC (Student Representitive Council), played basketball and badminton every Friday, and did my blue belt grading for Teakwondo, all the while raiding World of Warcraft every night and playing Nintendo games with my best friend every weekend.
I always had good grades, so my parents didn't really care what I did. In fact, I got a new laptop every couple of years to play games on because they thought I was using it for homework.... which wasn't entirely a lie. I studied Infomation Technology, so most of the time, I was working on programming and game development, so... my gaming evntually became research and development for my university projects.
you're not strange, everyone is peculiar and all this guy try to do is generalize everyone and everything into 1 single group, which is a very miserable approach and very unscientific.
@@MrEliasQueirogaThis video is for people whose addiction to gaming is seriously detrimental. This video is not for all gamers and not for the commenter you're replying to. Stop whining, this is free and he never implied what you said.
As a 26yo man that has been a tryhard gamer his whole life, that feels behind in life and that struggles with socializing, this video made a huge impact in me. I wish someone told me all of this when I was 15. My mom used to tell me I acted like a drug addict when I was gaming and I used to laugh. Now I understand.
the sad thing is you would not have listen to them telling you all this when you were 15. my nom told me but as all kids i would not listen. i just did the same two weeks ago talking to my little cousin (15years younger) on what is better for him. he did not want to know. give him 10 years and he will come back saying he wishes someone would have said that to him (what i did). no one will listen, ever
Why does it matter how others think of you? Don’t let others shame you for your interests. Video games have been getting a bad rap since their invention.
Put that same confidence, work ethic, consistency and time into real life activities and you will find that you get a lot out of life.
I relate with you so much. My mom also used to tell me I was playing too much but I was completely in denial since I was addicted. I also developed issues with communication that got worse over time as I was isolated most of the time, and day to day life was difficult since. I started very young so it took really long to realize it, but now I just saw the bad sides of this hobby and wish I could spend all the time grinding games mindlessly doing other things I enjoy. It saddens me because I was a pretty smart kid and I feel like I wasted my potential. I really think that this is like a trap that you can't get out of by yourself once you get addicted. Of course, this is still entertainment. And if you do it under a controlled environment that's fine. But most kids don't have this awareness and unless their parents set boundaries, it's truly gonna affect them in a bad way.
@@tf9350 you can’t waste your potential unless your dead. You have plenty of time to do whatever you define as productive or that will lead to being successful.
Even if you just tried, you would be doing more then those that don’t which is a massive chunk of the population.
Everyone is afraid of failure in todays age, when in reality the most successful people have failed the most, but just learnt from the failures and kept trying
i felt like a 1 lvl character aka a newborn while i was watching the video... he literally explained us why we feel like a shit AND provided us with solutions for this problem. things the author said seem so easy to come across like why wouldnt i think about it??? i truly appreciate your help, healthygamergg 🙏😭
I was a gamer early and I'm still a gamer, but procrastination was never a problem. The biggest problems in my life were that I'd do all the things that people said they wanted me to do, and then I never got the reward. Constant rejection and work completed in vain were the experiences of my 20s. I suppose maybe that's common for most young men though, whatever their hobbies are.
I've got a great LIFE hack for you!
Rename your "To Do" list "Quest Log".
Assign rewards for each "quest" e.g. mins of game time, favourite foods and snacks, coins, read one page of your favourite comic book, watch 1 episode of your tv show or anime. Make sure they are things you can give yourself right away after each task or at least at the end of the day (Like when you would have handed all your quests in at once, before logging off.)
When it clicks in your mind that life is just a series of World of Warcraft daily quests, your productivity will just sky-rocket.
@@VixeyTehholy shit what a genius, you just solved basically all my problems
@@VixeyTeh Completely beside the point. The ultimate reward is other people. You work hard, you get a pat on the back or, in time, a promotion or the ability to grow your business. You work on yourself, you become more popular in your community. But what if that does not happen, or doesn't happen to the extent that you feel necessary for the slog to be rewarding?
This is the problem even moderately successful people face these days. They lack the kind of community that would give them the necessary feedback, in terms of directions as well as rewards. Retreating into gaming is just a symptom. Society is disintegrating into cells too small to further support the human experience we evolved for.
wow, I've been able to relate to your videos before but this one just hit with every word, and it was all making sense. I'm in college but I've always been a heavy gamer and procrastinator which has lead me to get behind in college. My sister graduated early, my friends already have six figure jobs, and I still can't do the simple things in life that I know I have to do. I can't ever stick with a positive behavior pattern for very long, and the cycle of feeling ashamed for not doing what I have to do then not doing it continues.
A video that unbiasedly and accurately explains how and why things happen and how to fix them is a thousand times better than someone just telling you to stop doing it. After the gifted child video this feels too relatable and significant to not learn from. GG
You have just described the past 5 years of my life with words that I have never heard of but had many familiar experiences with. I am very glad to hear that there is always someone who will understand my situation and can help me through it. Originally I thought it was just myself that lacked the ability to do things, but now that you have informed me of everything I will try to take a step for change that I have longed for. Thank you. ❤
30yrs of gaming
It really depends on how committed and determined you are to endure suffering without distractions and work things out. I've been constantly trying to get out of distractions lately and it's really hard. I want to start things but don't know how and my brain tricks me that "What I've done is enough already" so I give in.
But Everytime, we fall we still need to get up.
The breaking down your problems is what I've been doing for over 3 years now, I am still struggling to finish the "main quest", but it is a really good advice to give to someone who is struggling with the same problem. If I could time travel back, I would certainly give this advice to past me.
I always thought that I was the only one struggling with this problem, but reading the other comments tells me that I'm not alone in this battle
This channel has always been the greatest. We're receiving sufficient knowledge on things rather consistently.
Agreed, as soon as I get a notification I come to watch. It's great to learn so much from these videos.
im always surprised by how often this guy can casually drop the best practical advice, backed by science and a very logical train of thought. his preparation process has gotta be bordering on perfect for these videos
Exactly!! Most self improvement channels just make a 10 minute video saying a whole lotta nothing while this guy is giving so much great practical advice, I love it
Hands down this video has been one of your best. I'm recovering from a severe video game addiction from my early twenties (I'm turning 27 now) and what you mentioned here resonated A LOT with me on an astounishing level. I'm certain I'm on a good way now, but negative emotions and fatigue are often plagueing me, resulting in a negative feedback loop, with it's ebbs and flows of affecting ego strength.
The way you frame the problem takes away one important aspect of these negative feedback loops, and that's the way of self-relating, which is a key factor in leaving the past behind and not feeding negative complexes. They way you explain this issue on a neuropsychologic level makes me access important things:
Self forgiveness and a sense of groundedness, well balanced with a sense of self-responsibility!
Thank you Dr. K!
I am about to hit 30 and really trying to get in control and understanding of my mental and emotional imbalances. I have been playing games since I was a kid, and I was worried that it effected me more negatively then I originally imagined. I finally fought the fear and started watching your videos on how it HAS affected me, and I am really appreciative of this.
This is what has me stuck. Ive always been a gamer, but after dropping out of college and discovering my ADHD and Autism, i went back to my coping strategy from my childhood- I kept playing games. I carry my switch if I've to go out anywhere and most days I stay in my room and stay in a state of escape. I'll bring this up with my therapist tomorrow. Thanks for the video. ❤
This is everything I needed to hear. Gaming keeps stealing me away from what I want to do so I'll be sitting there having fun but feeling guilty the entire time and angry at myself for not doing what I need to be doing after work or on the weekends.
I feel like over the last few years my daydreams became something of an addiction to me very similar to how you described video games in this video. Every time i begin to feel negative emotions, instead of sitting on them, i retreat into my own daydreams where stories take place, where things go right and wrong, but everything is under my control and it has the same effects as video games on me, the numbing of negative emotions and the gaining of dopamine, all taking place in my own mind. I could be doing a serotonergic activity but in the back of my mind there's always that ongoing imaginary storyline basically doing what video games do, only 24/7, it happens automatically, especially when i'm trying to read and study, it's exhausting. The worst part is that it has infected one of my favorite pass-times which is listening to music, i could be listening to anything, but it's like a sleeper agent, like the sound of music turns on the story simulation inside my mind, i literally can't try to relax by listening to anything because i begin to daydream immediately and it's intense, i can't think properly about the real world and so i just give up and allow myself to be swallowed by my thoughts, and it just ends up tiring me.
Thought I was the only one gang, it’s super intrusive a lot of the times but when ur bored it’s fun and gives a lot of dopamine. Blessing and a curse….
It's over for us istg
@@Amanwiza Yup, I'm a pretty big daydreamer too. The fact that you can do it any time and anywhere is both the best and worst thing about it. With something like a phone addiction you can just physically put the phone away. You can't physically put away your mind
I think a name for this might be maladaptive daydreaming? I've only heard of it so I don't know any details, but it might be something to look into for solutions.
I used to do this all the time, a little less now. I couldn’t walk outside without my headphones, walking with music gave some confidence haha. And once a day for an hour I would listen to music (mostly soundtracks) it would make the stress of daily things (exams, loneliness, future career, etc.) go away and ‘replenish’ my will to do things. Eventually life got more complicated and that coping mechanism was not enough, covid lowkey helped me avoid a panic attack or a meltdown at school because I avoided facing my peers and teachers face to face I was able to take criticism or downright bashing without being stared at, and eventually I became comfortable with asking questions online and in person. I still retreat to those behaviors when I’m feeling especially down so I’ll take Dr. K’s advice on doing things in real life I would like to do.
I have never been more called out by a YT intro than this one. Totally encompasses my life and I thought I was just a loser, thank you so much for explaining that it's not just me and I can fix it.
I don t think tha🎉 you are
Dr. K, I used to be in a state of Serotinergic Aversion for several years, and doing 'simple' things like studying, doing laundry, making myself food used to be so hard for me. Gaming was the only thing I found myself driven to do. As of the last year or so, I find myself constantly seeking serotinergic activities like studying, making food, working out, running, etc. However, I also find it hard to sit down and game for hours on end like I used to (not sure if this is a good or bad thing lol). I'd much rather do something 'productive' than game even though I want to game.
How did you make the switch?
@@caseyeaston7470 For me, I think it started with forcing myself to actually make my bed every morning when I woke up. It’s such a small thing, but it made me start my day by accomplishing something tangible. From there it snowballed over the course of a year or two, where I would keep asking myself: “okay what’s next?”. I was eventually able to regain my love for weightlifting and long distance running among other things like studying and stuff.
I think I'm experiencing something similar!
I also had a similar experience of gaming less because it wasn't as rewarding as serotonergic activities. In my case I was able to take a shortcut because I has people close to me (mostly family) that ran and exercised at least semi-regularly. I just followed their lead and quickly got into running and joined my high school's cross country team / track & field teams. Because I made friends with people on the running teams I was surrounded by other people who encouraged me to run with them on weekends and further step away from playing games all day.
In short, join a friendly / casual running club if you have the opportunity.
yea at this point im realizing how much worse my emotional state is when im gaming, I try and hop on but it genuinely becomes a bad experience most the time whether I win or lose
the most important thing (imo) is the process of replacing all that time which gaming took up. getting off the game isnt an instant good feeling to me, I get this worrying sense of "what now?" and I think responding to that feeling in the right way is so impactful.
it genuinely feels like im gonna be stuck with that "what now?" feeling FOREVER without gaming, but that's not the case at all. it's just a process of letting go of that dopamine dependence, and also figuring out what genuinely fulfills you. what makes you enjoy your time. and then working to be aware of that.
I am also a doctor now. Finished my residency and fellowship. Became a husband and father. And honestly videogames were always there for me throughout the tough times. But raising a family, i slowly went from gaming 10 hrs a day to just 30 mins many times zero hours lol. Also it helped having other physical hobbies like swimming. I conquered rivers as a child.
badass
@@YoufeelmeTuts not really. Growing up i got punched in the stomach a lot without putting up a fight.
@@pipebomber04not fighting is the most badass reaction to physical threat
how scared were you of becoming a dad and the responsibility & lifestyles that come with it?
so is acting like you dont care@@danm8004
I am a casual gamer in my late thirties, I once was hard-core, shutting it off after twelve hours with that sinking feeling of regret. Though your points are to the extremes, I definitely agree with them and want to summarize that you need to be aware of it all and balance the physical world with the virtual, and this goes for any media device as well.
sometimes people are aware but due to other issues they feel unable or anxious at the thought of going out into the physical world and interacting with people in that kind of setting
@@timetotalk2023 that's life. Interacting with people keeps you grounded, as uncomfortable as it may be, the more you do the less scary it is and the less awkward the next round will be. Not saying you won't ever not be awkard, I still am at 40, but I embrace it and people like me for it, it's being unique and genuine.
its not about it being awkward or worrying u wont fit in. I personally used to love going out to party's getting fked up with my friends meeting new people and such but then i had some issues with some very nasty people who for about a year straight were trying to break into my house and steal my stuff partly my own fault due to the nature of the business i was in then. i had people pull knifes on me on the street try force me to go bk to mine with them and unlock the door cause they couldn't break it. i got stabbed on multiply occasions try to defend myself anyway now i cant go out without a knife and that's not safe for other people or myself if some1 with there hood up is walking behind me i assume im away to get jumped and im immediately clutching that knife or clenching my fist and 9/10 its just some1 walking minding there own bussiness on occasion i have been so sure ive ending up attacking people who weren't trying to do anything to me. i apologise for such a long repley but this is the short version tbh and this is just my reasons there r many others with other very complex issues that makes things that u mite find everyday and easy extremely diffcult, it is often far more than just fear of being solically awkward or not fitting in @@joelc3449
@@timetotalk2023 yup, didn't see that one coming.
i apologise for the rant i don't know why i got so triggered. I have my reasons and you have yours for why interacting with people in the real world or going out can be difficult and nether are any less vaild or difficult than the other nor r the many other reasons other people struggle also. sry again joel @@joelc3449
This is really reinforcing to hear, because I've sort of been pin pointing my issues as to why I don't progress much in life (as Dr. K put) and I've been trying to fill my time with chores and more importantly, cooking my meals myself. Take time away from the screen at the very least to tend to yourself in a healthy way. Amazing advice overall. Dr. K gets it.
if you already dont spend youre time with technology that much then sell it!!!!!!!!!!!! technology becomes useless once you use it only for small stuff like you said
Having someone like this to just explain stuff like this without having to pay for it is really nice and encouraging. I’m just working and see his video pop up and listen while I work. It’s always fun to listen to what he has to say. The fact that he is or was a gamer is also comforting.
As an autistic person, socializing has always been difficult for me. I've never been able to "fit in" anywhere, or I'd always say the wrong thing and this makes socializing painfully awkward. Gaming has always been a way for me to escape that. While I don't game as much as I have in the past, I tend to engage more in hobbies that are of great interest to me now. Being home and keeping myself busy with projects and learning new skills is now my go-to for pleasure. I still like gaming tho :)
Welp I'm Autistic Introvert And I Love Gaming!
Im autistic too, but i have attention disorder, i tried some medicines but it keep being a shit, its difficult to talk with other people and i have already failed a lot trying to do other things, i try to study coding, something i like and i work with, but its just Impossible to keep it for more than 1 day. Im literaly just living and seeing my life going away while i waste my time playing, and sometimes im not really enjoying
@@victoroliveira8310 I'm An Autistic Too
@@victoroliveira8310 I recently got into coding as well. When I get into it, I stay into it for weeks on end but then it just sits on the shelf for a while until I think of something else to make. I get lost easily when the code branches off into too many different routines or functions. My programs are rather simple with the exception of an encryption technique I'd been working on. However, retention is spotty at best. Many times I'm still using google or going back to previous programs to figure out how something is done or how I did something before. I hope to make coding a career one day, but fear of failure is severely limiting me.
If coding is something you love, keep at it! even if you don't get anywhere in life with it, it's still nice to have the ability to create something that doesn't exist elsewhere to perform a specific task, even if it's just for you.
@@wadz668 But Why Did Some Autistics Love Codings?
I have been playing games since i was 6 (28 now)
Everything i have felt and experianced has been summed up nicely in this video. The feelings of never being good enough, the sudden hyper feelings of anxiety to the point i was even put on medication.
Fittingly, the best thing that has helped me overcome this is that i have a 10 hr job that doesnt allow any electronics and is rather intensive on the body. The feeling of acomplishment i get from doing this job day after day is better than any world ive saved playing a game.
Good advice and worth taking to heart.
What job you do, Sir.?
I'm also curious what type of work you do.
for people asking what kind of work: I don't know what OP does, but I can tell you that it's easy to get a job in logistics and delivery (think Amazon, Fedex, UPS), they are physically intensive and no electronics allowed (except the ones you need to do the job).
Same! 10hr jobs(manufacturing) through my 20’s has been the saving my life with seretonin. I am also 28 and have been playing games since 6 or 7 lol
@@Blasphemousa Im not him, but I do a job with a lot of human interaction and problem solving on the spot. I put myself in a chaotic situation and solve it over and over. I get a good sense of fulfillment. If not for yourself, help others.
Make their days.
That will generate serotonin.
I'm glad I could subconsciously solve some of these issues on my own without knowing they were a problem, but its certainly interesting seeing some of my behaviors laid out so plainly.
Wow, you singlehandedly changed mt entire perspective on mental illness in just under 4 minutes in your “Sit with negative emotions” part. Rather than thinking of them as a hindering, they are a prompt or an incentive to better ourselves. Im now subbed
Love all the little metaphors you do. Your work is wonderful and definitely must help so many people. Thank you for this. 💚
Indeed, speaking to gamers in 'their' language helps transfer the concepts of what he is trying to teach you.
Edit: wow thank you so much to everyone for all the encouraging replies. You're all awesome and I believe in all of you!
I have ADHD, pretty bad social anxiety, and I was always terrible at most sports, so I found it hard to get into team sports that I could build my social interactions with.
Started lifting weights about 6 months ago and it has changed my life. It’s weirdly boring in the action but it still feels so good. I’m a long way away from my personal goals but I’m benching 70 kg/150 lbs and deadlifting 110 kg/240 lbs. Lots of people are much better than that but I’m really proud I’ve found something like this
Good for you man. I've been thinking about getting into lifting myself
Good job man, I also have ADHD and I think picking up combat sports was my saving grace
@@rhomboidq7001Yes! Combat sports are great. I'm on the spectrum and have ADHD and it's such a good way to create discipline
@@rhomboidq7001 I just wish kickboxing wasn't 160+ a month 😭
The best part of working out is you don't have to stop being a nerd to do it. You see the majority of the results in doing one hour workouts everyday. You don't have to be a 3 hour gym rat to see results. Get your Mike Mentzer style workout in, shower, eat, and then play video games. Makes life so much better because your body and brain begin to work better, making everything else more enjoyable. Same goes for nutrition. Make your homecooked meals all nutritious and then when you go out and eat junk food with your friends, your body isn't dying because you put yet another empty calorie in it.
I’m a few months late but I really enjoyed this video as it made me reflect on my relationship with gaming and my personal development. I’ve played my whole life, but luckily my parents were smart enough to set rules and boundaries on me when it came to games. At first gaming was a social experience. I grew up in the late 90s/early 00s so everything was couch co-op or competitive local play. I learned how to use video games to build relationships and understand healthy competition. Also, I had time limits, so I couldn’t waste away entire days playing games. Had to be active or find other hobbies as well. Of course as I got older and independent sometimes I’d choose to spend an entire day gaming, eating, smoking etc but I was never fulfilled at the end of the day and noticed patterns of how I would do this mainly during low points in my life. So now I’ve created my own balance, maybe 2-3 hours every 2-3 days after all my tasks/goals are done and I could go weeks without gaming if needed to refocus on goals. It’ll always be a big part of my life and a major hobby but I’ve found the perfect balance and am a proud “filthy casual” lol it’s definitely possible to be a lifelong gamer without long term degeneracy!
One of the greatest activities to fight seratonin aversion with is working out. Not only will you feel better about yourself and more confident, it is also very good for your physical health and generally makes you more attractive.
You know for some reason, my parents and even school teachers (not gym teachers of course) would try to suggest that working out was too much work for me and that it would tire me out too much lol.
This was happening when I was 14 - 17, but my case is unique because my ADHD meds (guanfacine) caused me to be almost underweight, and I’ve always eaten whatever trash I wanted to and remained perfectly slender my whole life.
Only recently do I feel an actual loss of appetite though. Am I growing older lol?
I always wanted to try doing climbing but it feels like my wrists have recently weakened a little over time. Although I can lift weights to a good extent (but I don’t even lift bro), I can no longer do a single pull-up, which is a little concerning.
I think this is mainly because of the meds, but my parents are veggie and never let me cook meat in the house (I’d never eaten bacon for breakfast until 20). Cold meats and ready meals weren’t enough to combat this. Extremely careless on their part, but I digress.
I also did jitterclicking on Minecraft every day for about 4 hours, on and off, of course. This lasted for about 3 months, until I quit Minecraft AND jitterclicking altogether because of the aching pains it gave me (also purple skin from burst blood vessel in hand).
My wrist seemed okay pretty quickly, but it still felt weird sometimes. Fast forward 1 1/2 years and it randomly had constant, unbearable, almost excruciating pain. I waited an entire month where the doctor told me f*** all (to stop using it until it felt better for several weeks). I wore a kind of pressure bandage which neither me or my parents understood that I shouldn’t have worn at night, and we booked private a few days earlier than the free physio appointment.
Private physio helped me immediately - physically and in soul. Though it took about 4 months of using it more and more, and doing resistance exercises (which was a challenge because I was scared the pain meant I was damaging my wrists, and I ended up doing them less than half as often as asked, even through him reassuring me that in my case it was safe), which reduced it to a minor ache after those 4 months, the pain is all gone now.
But again, my wrists are both fairly weak and I think I gotta drop my meds if I don’t want to screw up my body completely going forwards…
Well, that’s my story lol
Also now I play souls, coming up for my level 1 no hit bosses using parry and knife run of Elden Ring
100% I wonder if its why I don't fit into Dr. Ks description, I love video games, but I work out hard and push myself. I don't seem to struggle with difficult emotions and I feel good about myself no matter where I am in my fitness journey.
The key is to have multiple hobbies and don't stick with a single videogame. I love games but I also started working out as early as 15 years old
20pushups every time you die, 10 everytime you win.
This feels like such a glass half empty look on videogames. I have been playing games since I was probably 6-7 years old and still play them 2 decades later because it is just a fun hobby to have and it is nice to be part of the gaming community and discuss what you like and not like with so many different people. I experience new stories and be informed on just different elements of the gaming industry. It's no different than watching lots of movies or reading tons of books. Sure, there have been times where a game kinda consumed my life like Totk recently for example, but gaming has never been the reason I have a more introverted mindset or feel down on myself or let my life spiral out of control at points. There are so many other factors in life than games to exacerbate that kind of feeling. Just like with anything else, if you have a good grasp on the limits, you shouldn't be encouraged to give up on what you like to do with your own life.
Exactly. This guy had problems so he assumed all or, at least, the vast majority, have the same problems he has which is just not true. Games aren't the reason he's had problems, those were problems he already had that he blamed on video games. Thumbs down to this video.
i feel the same. i think he was just stretching a lot of things just so he could make a video on the topic. i would prefer to watch a more honest version
The whole "gamify your life" is why I love the game "Ringfit" and the anime "Bottom Tier Character Tomozaki-kun" : whether it's sports gamified for Ring fit or social interactions gamified for Tomozaki, they both show that everybody is capable of doing stuff, they just need to be shown a way to do it tailored for them.
That anime is so good
Good game
You may also like Zombies Run
I've found that having a cold bath/shower everyday helps aswell. I started doing it 2 months ago. There has been days where I've completely not wanted to do it and I've had to really force myself to get in. I feel alot better going out in public and genuinly feel more confident outside. That and little exercise not too hard but keeping up the routine has helped me immensely.
i love that he doesn't treat games like a disease, he doesn't make you get rid of it, he actually is "gamefying" life, so that its easier to understand, +1 Sub
This video is spot on. The exact reason when I turned to gaming was trying to suppressed negative emotions in life. Sometimes pain is too unbearable and I need an escape. But after a while, when I feel better, I would convert back to normal life.
I'm only 12 minutes in but I gotta say, this is exactly capturing a lot of my feelings. I've started journaling a few months ago and at some point recently I managed to make a list of issues and negative feelings I have encountered repeatedly. It helps that a couple recent events since the start of the year have given me the drive to start journaling and self-healing, and a clear goal for the future that I'm willing to sacrifice and better myself for. I've recently graduated and been gaming all my life, so I guess this is the turning point. Thanks, doc.
Damn, I read this as "I'm only 12, but I gotta say". Was really impressed there for a bit 😂 even when you said graduated, I figured it must be elementary school
@@pachicleto2129 LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLL
@@pachicleto2129 Loooooooooooooooooooool
Duuuuude…… for years I’ve been trying to understand how people lay out their life so easily and how they know what they want and how they’ll get there step by step and I’ve never been able to process the second step of my own journey. Thank you for this, I picked this video at random of all the ones you have and I think this is the one I needed to see today. Happy gaming🤙🏾
I have a lot of gamer friends who are retired individuals, they say if it wasn't for the games or the pets they own, they say they would have gone insane or ended up in some mental institution. A few of them are widower, and some are veterans suffering from PTSD. I guess they dont need any of the negative emotions suppressed by the gaming but just some fun and relaxing things to do. I myself would have gone off the face of the earth if it wasn't for the gaming habit I caught on back in 2013, which helped me with my depression. I know sometimes it kind of feels like addiction, but as long as you are disciplined and on schedule, it is therapeutic. Like they say, everything in moderation always helps.
Exactly, I play video games between 1-3 hours a day, and I feel great. Some times I miss a day or two. Video games helped me to get rid of depression, also helped me with my career, I work in gaming industry and I make good money because of video games.
Honestly video games have been the healthier part of my life digitally speaking, mostly because I self moderate myself pretty well. My weakness has always been doomscrolling forums, Reddit, and now TH-cam. The advice is identical regardless but its important to understand the roll each of your hobbies plays in your life/well-being. Its not perfect for me but I do have a full-time job, workout regularly, walk my dog etc... but improving my social life and stagnant career are the hurdles I'm focusing on now.
As a teen, I ran away from emotions as there was too much to handle. Partially because some issues were not mine to solve. However, as a consequence, as an adult, I had to learn how to socialize and how to play the game of life. The people I have met and the environment I found helped me evolve as a human. I'm eternally grateful for those in my path that have helped me develop. Now I can game for pleasure and I learned to not run away from emotions, though sometimes it is still difficult to break the habit as using games to mentally run away seems so comfortable in the moment.
Seems really relevant to executive function issues experienced in adhd/‘high functioning’ autism, & suggests this may be an exacerbated effect amongst those on the spectrum. Interesting, thank you. 🕊🍃
Agreed. We already have a tendency towards an imbalance in these neurotransmitters.
The activities I like to do to raise my serotonin are:
-hanging out with friends (yes, that easy, do It's not as effective)
-Learning a mundane new skill (like knotting, sewing, drawing, soldering, etc.)
-Just learning a specific topic, like engines, electricity, magnetism, a new language, or many others.
These are the ones I like and do the most, I don't know how well it can work for you
This is the video i needed. Holy fuck. Thank you. I have been embracing these negative emotions a lot more these past couple of years because they have become so overpowered that gaming was just exacerbating my anxieties. Im 27 now and the bit about how i feel like progress is slow struck a chord. I look around and I see folks my age buy homes, get married, and live life while I battle these demons caused by my many hours and years given to gaming. I’ve had to delete social media because my brain was so sensitive to negative comparisons that disrupted my peace. My social anxiety I believe stemmed from staying indoors for days on end all through high school, over the summers, and even in college when those should have been times to socialize, fail, and experience life. I try hard not to regret that period of my life because there is nothing i can do about it now. I do not want to live in the past. But progress is progress even if slow and i thank you for validating that chronic gamers have a late start. But who said it’s a quick, competitive race? No one. It’s almost childish to have to break things down to the most basic components but those little successes is what snowballs and builds momentum. You sir are doing the lord’s work. Gaming is only getting more addictive, realistic, and accessible. This is not talked about enough.
should people be pushy and nosy to get social? like really intrusive and annoying? if nobody invites me to parties, just walk in on people's parties? "hey, nice 4th of July BBQ ya got going," right? that is how it works right?
@@kuwaizairIf no one invites you, you can invite or find real friends. I am gamer (started at 9-10 now 17 (almost 18) and every day 8-24 hours per day playing video games, watching TV, etc.) and I am stuck. Literally when I invite someone of my old friends (from the age I was 7-14) to go outside to play games, etc. they just do not respond or does not accept my invite. I know that I am being ignored etc. but I also know that I need to find people who would accept me but because of social anxiety and depresion, I can not even get strength to do it. Sometime it feels better to stay in room for years than interect with people who does not accept you. To make my self more confident I started to workout at home before going to new school which has a lot of people (more than 100). It is low for most of people but for me this number is enought big to have a pnic attack ecen thinking about going to school. So workout helped a little bit. After getting more confident in new school I did not workout anymore. Now I started again because I really want to change but there is like only enemies around me. Next year I will have exams (I want to be accountant I know its hard work and need skills I do not have) 4: history, math, lietrature and IT. I do not know what to do...
Wow this is actually eye opening, I’ve been playing video games since I was 5 as it was the main way I could communicate with my family due to having autistic gibberish syndrome as I liked to call it 😂. I did not realise that video games were holding me back and it wasn’t just my autism, I thought they were helping and they are but it has it drawbacks and I hadnt realised. The way you explained it was just perfect for me to understand and the way you explained how to overcome it has actually gave me ideas on how to move forward so thank you.
I lost most of my teenage years playing video games, i was playing 10 hours a day sometimes more. I was stuck into an seemingly endless loop of missing oportunities, running from myself and life, and blaming somebody else for my misery. I let myself dragged along in life, doing an college i didn't necesarly choose because i was too busy playing video games to just sit and think abou what i want, where i want to be, how to be happy...isn't happiness the ultimate goal for everybody? Thankfully i woke up soon enough to not lose my 20's also. I hate giving advices in general but i will just say this: take CONTROL, sit in quiet let your mind and body relax, think about what you do, why you do it, and ALWAYS be honest with yourself, its the only person you should never ever lie to. You will fins your way out, i did, and i was pretty messed up. Now i'm in a good place, i still play video games from time to time, but it is me who controls when, not my sense of wanting to run away from it all. Good luck, may you find peace and happiness!
Gaming is an addiction I don’t even like gaming anymore but I’m still stuck playing it
I mean, I'm on my 30s now, have a degree, married, have a job, have friends and most weekends I hang out with them, but I play a lot of games as well (mostly story or single player games). I feel these videos lean more towards people who just won't do anything besides playing, and I get that. I just wanted a video with the actual benefits of playing games on a regular basis.
It's not his fault that there are almost no benefits, besides the pleasure you get in the moment and MAYBE some inspiration (I'm an artist and I like drawing characters or landscapes from the games that I like)
I think he touched on the advantages of gaming before. For people who actually play multiple games in different genres, in general, get better at adapting/learning new stuff.
But for specifics though, different genre give different advantages
[here are some of my personal examples]
Strategy games (Civilization/Starcraft)
- handling multiple steps of planning and managing different resources
- thinking of what the other enemy is thinking
First Person Shooters (CS:GO)
-spatial and temporal awareness (estimating where someone might be based from their initial location and the elapsed time after spotting them)
-better spatial awareness for driving as well (corner checks = looking at side mirrors instinctively), stress management (not panicking when an enemy is shooting at you)
- better communications skills (if you actually are trying instead of flaming as well xD)
Third Person Shooter (Warframe)
- 3D awareness and physics
- Mathematical optimization (Modding...if you know you know
Story Driven Games
- Life lessons
- Puzzle solving (sometimes)
Racing Games
- Grasp of car physics like turning, acceleration (sound of engine and how fast the car could), braking, and crashing into different objects
RPG (Elden Ring)
- Advanced mental map
- Analysis during crisis (assessing the situation and looking for ways to overcome it despite the presence of fire-breathing dragons)
- Detachment......
Yeah I feel like whenever anyone says gaming or gamer it's just referring to multi-player games, which I guess is fair for these type of videos since people who play those get more likely to get sucked in and have more of an unhealthy addiction
The difference here is those that get addicted and those that dont. Anyone can get addicted or obsessed with many things and these people are most likely those with mental issues. The fact that you are married have kids a stable job that allows free time to play means that your mental health is mostly likely better off. Im sure you have your hardships but you have a better support system and mental health to overcome it and not get addicted or obsessed with something. If you had some trauma depression bipolar or hell lonely with no support maybe youd get addicted to porn anime gaming gambling drinking drugs food you name it.
@@catasplurge1000 my bf NEVER plays mp games and yet gaming is still 100% of what he does after work (he's at home office, so he never leaves his PC basically). Like literally there are no other interests and hobbies. It's so shallow and sad to look at honestly. I also love games, but only very few ones and I still manage to do something else with my life
As with most pleasures in life, moderation is key.
Nuance isn't really good when you're talking about science. What he is saying is pure fact, he's not giving his opinions.
It's up to you to accept truth or not, but if you think you're more knowledgeable than thousands of neuroscientist who studies those subjets everyday for decades, then there is no point of talking about anything
@@Williosx I think the word I meant is moderation, you're right
I always struggled with gaining weight as a teen and even into my early 20s, I noticed every time I slowed/stopped playing video games regularly my weight got better.
Playing video games had me ignore my hunger to the point where I don’t even notice it since I was so heavily into whatever game I’m playing.
I’m 5’8 and have went from 120 pds as a teen to 135 as a 18 y/o when I stopped gaming.
When I started again over the coarse of a year I dropped down to 127 and as a 24 y/o rose back up again to 147.
This video really put things into perspective
Awesome! I couldn't give up gaming completely, personally - it's a part of my life I enjoy a lot. I have cut back a fair bit on the gaming though and have felt so much more confidence as of late with improving my life and situation 😊
I’ve been playing World of Warcraft on and off since I was 16 and am now in my mid-30’s. I met someone special, moved countries, and am job hunting. I find that amidst the stress, I often fantasize about what I’m going to do in the game.
I’ll even google articles about the game while I’m riding in a car. I sometimes would rather game than do something fun with my partner. I’ve begun to wonder why I have these main goals, and have had them for years, but don’t accomplish them.
I so appreciated this video. It contains a lot of empathy and empowering information. I thought there was something wrong with me, but it seems my brain is just rusty. Time to learn French, practice violin, and build an art business.
Personally I feel like the longer video games are around the better a lot of us will be at teaching our kids how to manage themselves better then we did through this mix of virtual and physical world.
Well put kind sir. We use that as a guide and help, and if a mistake is made in the virtual world its literally nothing. But in rl its difficult.
Why should i add more words to your comment, its beautiful thinking the way it is, i meant .
when you say "virtual world" made me think of those fucking online life simulator game things everyone I know who played those 10-15 years ago or whatever is completely fucked in the head (I never did myself)
John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
@@celshante1769 John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
@@juhis5936 John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
I had the opposite... I wasn't taught much of anything by my dad that built up my sense of capability, so I used video games as a crutch to exercise some kind of management and problem solving. So, I definitely was feeling my negative emotions, but also totally disconnected and disassociated. It was/is a weird hybrid. This makes it really easy to understand the upside-down disconnect of the serotonin behaviors and why the last few months I've been reconnecting to my actual anger, because I'm doing difficult things that aren't that pleasurable, but do enhance my overall trajectory in life.
Definitely on this path. Been gaming since I was 3. Yep, 3. 33 years. I still do, but am much less reliant on them as a crutch, and I'm able to savor a fun game whilst playing less often. It's more satisfying that way.
Well, I’ve definitely been feeling off lately and this was good to see. Ive pretty much been gaming my whole life so it almost feels like part of my identity. Knowing this makes me feel stuck, I’d be so much better had I never gotten into gaming. I just really don’t want to be a gamer anymore but I don’t really know of life for myself outside of it, it’s just so deeply ingrained in my life from childhood. I’m about to be 25 and it feels like if I don’t stop now I’m not going to find true happiness and meaningfulness. As much as I love games, after watching this I think I wish I was never a gamer
You can be happy, find multiple hobbies you got this
You don't have to stop (at least not immediately), dr k in this vid doesn't necessarily say you have to stop.
Just do what this vid says, start doing things that your life needs and be able to sit with uncomfy feelings those things cause
It’s not like gaming is the only source of this behaviour. It’s any addictive thing. If it’s reading fantasy, or running, or dancing… it’s still a problem. I urge you to not beat yourself up about gaming, and instead be vigilant about anything in your life that you might do in an addictive way.
@@spacewolfcub Well said
What helped me was finding an easily accessible, cheap hobby. The gym required little. I also crochet while I watch youtube and the hooks and few types of yarn cost me 25 bucks. You can start today and make anything from a youtube tutorial.
36 year old gamer who has been gaming since i was 7 years old.....
I'm going to listen to this every day... its so damn helpful...............
Holy crap. I’ve been watching this channel for a long time and have always found helpful information, but this video feels like it broke barriers. I’d venture to say that this is the best video you’ve made to date. I gasped multiple times while watching because of how relatable yet groundbreaking this was. Thank you for doing what you do.
I feel like this applies to things like reading too, but to a lesser extent. With reading, as long as it's a difficult enough book from a linguistic and emotional level, you're more likely to face negative emotions. We all need some escapism after all. Plus it helps us reflect on our life.
This applies to basically anything dopamine inducing that can become an unhealthy addiction. For some people, that means needing to cut themselves off completely because that's what they need to be healthy. For others, it's a matter of developing a more healthy relationship to that thing by addressing the core issue which frees then to interact with the thing they enjoy in a more healthy way that doesn't negatively impact the rest of their life. Some things should be cut out (like drugs or porn), but I really don't think video games are one of those things that absolutely need to be cut out because there objectively are healthy ways of engaging with it as a single part of your larger life (same as reading, or whatever other innocuous hobby you have).
This video is definitely some good advice for most gamers. I was once forced to stop gaming for months and really noticed the difference in my mood and motivation when the serotonin worked properly again. I did go back to my old habits however to cope, but this can absolutely work for many gamers.
I will say though, it probably depends on what kind of gamer you are. If you play games that give you challenges and make you think for yourself, operationalisation is probably less of a problem. If you play to become good enough to inspire others or just want to find friends that way or just maintain friendships it can probably supply a decent amount of serotonin as well. But if you're playing just to grind f.e. (since that's the easiest way to supply dopamine), this video 100% applies to you.
I'm almost 40 yrs of gaming. Ain't gonna stop now