I think it's important to note, if you're taking it slow and building "attraction" you're giving the guy(or girl) space to heal/tie loose emotional ends of their previous relationship. Sometimes he will slow it down, but you should too when he gets carried away. Sometimes the previous relationship was blocks someone from finding the right person, but you got to respect they need time. If they like you, they will come find you.
Krobe thanks. I needed to hear this. Currently talking to a guy I met online but we haven’t met in person yet to hang out, even though he’s told me he’d like to (just doesn’t know when). We’ve been texting consistently for about 3 weeks now. I guess “Slow and steady wins the race.” The thing is, he keeps asking when I’m free but doesn’t follow up with a plan to meet. So I don’t know what to make of it, or if I’m just overthinking things. 🤷🏻♀️
Met a guy on match. I was getting mixed messages but he was saying really nice things and seemed enamored. But he again should mixed messages and I pulled back. Sure enough he just confirmed he is still struggling from his breakup from a recent relationship..only three months since his breakup. I am bummed. But lesson learned..
There’s no definite answer. Every situation is different. Generally, the longer their previous relationship was, the longer you should stay away from them once it ends, unless you wanna get your heart broken🤣
Take this info with a grain of salt... when I met my now husband, at the time he was finalizing his divorce. He was like none of what is being said here... we have an amazing relationship and marriage. Been married 19 yrs now.
Why would he jump in another relationship?!! Well why would I give my body to a guy that doesn’t want a relationship? Ciao boy, go and play with yourself. If all women were strong enough to resist dating these men, they wouldn’t want to remain single for that long. I want freedom but still want a warm body! Go have your freedom without me. If all women said no, his freedom would not mean more women
So can we trust them ,,I date a guy for 3 months and I didn't know that he had a girlfriend after that we break up and I move on after 2 months he break up with his girlfriend and he came to me again and he break with his girlfriend for 15 days can be in relationship with him? How can believed him
I got into a relationship with a guy who just got divorced. I was with him for six years, and it was wonderful. He had a bad accident and passed away. I miss him so much
My ex husband and I were married 12 years and two months after our split he started dating someone else.. they’ve now been together 7 years and married one year 🤷🏻♀️
@@mycatsnameiskaren8253 I posted this 3 years ago 🤯.. you know what tho my ex husband tried to get back with me during the lockdown in June and keeps flirting with me which I found hilarious!! Safe to say I told him where to go as there’s no way I’d get back with him.. still a power trip for me lol
Update 2021... so in January 2021 we found out that my ex husband has been cheating on his current wife with a woman he works with! This started last September and the woman came to his door in January and told my ex’s wife! (The wife is the woman he was dating two months after leaving me but I’m sure he was seeing her when we were together) as it stands because of their financial predicament the wife has given him another chance lol but I’ve also found out that the wife has a 20 thousand gambling debt so hence keeping him around to pay it off! It’s all been so overwhelming for me it was like the situation was repeating itself but I was the outside viewer. Madness
Elliot is right ladies speaking from experience don’t let them sweet talk you once they get you and the excitement wears off they’re gone or have pulled away to the next thing that excites them. Enjoy yourself be with a guy who is emotionally mature and has moved on from his divorce. Do not entertain a guy that has yet to let go they need time! don’t be the rebound. Wishing you all the best and you deserve the best!
Okay, you are all like don't date a guy who just got out of a relationship but guest what... THAT IS THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE. Most people dont remain single.
He just got out of a long relationship, I been single for the most part of 8 years. I'm just enjoying getting go know him and learn him. I'm in no rush and want him to get over what ever he needs to. Our dates are fun and amazing... we talk a few times a day and text, praying I'm not just a void filler....
This is such BS. I just got out of a 3 year Relationship. What I learned was to not ignore red flags and go with my gut. I understand so much more of what I want in a women. Yes I plan on playing the field but I would absolutely end that for the right women. I don't need a year to play the field to know what I want.
I have been burned so many times by men freaking out once I start to reciprocate their emotions. I am crystal clear up front that (a) I am emotionally incapable of handling casual sex (and I have accepted that’s how I’m wired), and (b) I’m looking for a long-term relationship. So to be honest, your advice to keep it casual and “hook up” to build the attraction really rubs me the wrong way. I have made the mistake of having sex too soon because his words and actions all told me that he wanted what I want, only to end up with him flipping a switch and getting ghosted or him just losing interest, and me feeling used and hurt. So I changed my policy to, you don’t get to sleep with me unless you’re ready to love me. I have noticed that a lot of these videos are geared toward women having to change themselves to work with men and that also doesn’t sit right with me. I shouldn’t have to shove my own needs and desires aside to walk on eggshells and hope I get the guy, like he’s a prize and somehow above me. I have a lot to offer, and I’m a damn good catch. I have dealt with a lot of bullshit in dating but am a firm believer that the right person will love me for me, and I won’t have to play games, bend over backwards to accommodate his “live in the moment” mentality, or deny myself to get that result. I believe I have finally found the right man, but we just got into a relationship, so time will tell.
SAME here. I was the rebound. We dated 6 months. I tried so hard to "take it slow" because I knew he was healing and just out of a relationship. But, I did start to put pressure on at the end as I wasn't getting my needs met in the relationship. He broke up with me just before Christmas. It really hurts.
You are so right Elliott! I found being not so available and never pressuring him also opens him up more because he doesnt feel pressured! It's a hard thing to learn to do but if you just let it flow and let him talk about relationship material it will happen!
Ur right 1000% my x husband told me the exact things ur saying!! Right after our divorced he was dating a girl that he was trying to get rid off!! Cause HE WANTED HIS FREEDOM
Great, I'm interested in a young man who just got out of an on-off troubled relationship and he seems quite interested, but he himself told me he would need time to be stable again and I found that very honest of him. Glad I found this video to add on how I'm coping with it. Not rushing anything, respecting his time (for him AND me), nothing good gets away and the most important thing is making a great impression. I just know he won't forget me and I leave it be. Trying to eat it while it's too hot however can cause some bad injuries.
I think if you're looking for something lighthearted, "being" with him is not as bad. I seem to always involved with guys just got of out relationship. We shared decent connection tbh, but I always keep my head grounded and pause at the right time.
This applies for the guy I'm dating rn but I also see daily guys go from one relationship to the next over night. The window of opportunity with quality single men is really small.
So are you saying just keep dating the newly single guy and take it slow? Or just tell him to enjoy his singlehood for now and get back to me after a yr? And we’ll see if we’re both avaialable and still attracted to each other?
Firsf half of the video, “Yes, absolutely”. Second half: no woman should ever consume herself with how to appropriately tiptoe around any man in an effort to play a game to get him to be “addicted” to her, to circumvent the adult growing and healing such a “man” needs to do. Any many who behaves this way IS WRONG and wildly reckless and irresponsible. He needs to take time off and deal with solitude, or ONLY engage women who are absolutely and honestly looking for nothing serious, themselves. Suggesting “hanging out AND hooking up at the same time WITH an agenda will *always always always* lead to attachment and being in a mess and things ending with the poor, trusting woman in this scenario ending up feeling USED, because she WAS. Every. Single. Time. Ladies, if a man tells you he has been divorced less than 1 yr (even THAT is risky), do NOT let FOMO and Futute Faking get the best of you. Just RUN. R U N .
I totally agree who wants to be a booty call and a rebound.. I've told some guys go get you a prostitute you can pay them have sex and go y'all separate ways fr..
The “freedom” part doesn’t take into account the fact that there are men who don’t want to be single. Not all of em chose to be divorced/broken up with. So if there’s a reason not to date him right away it’s not because he needs freedom it’s because he needs to heal and get over his ex. I was a rebound and got left when he went back to her. Stay vigilant out there ladies lol.
Wow, you are on fire with these vids! Could of used this 2 weeks ago. Eh, on second thought, he was kinda boring 😂. I figured out the BS and dropped it like it's hot 🔥haha.
My ex (22 years of 'marriage') married within a year of our divorce. Seems to have sailed into the sunset with her(twelve years already). These type of guys marry quickly to keep up the facade that he was so desirable, such a great catch), they would surely crumble if they didn't. There are always women lining up the minute a man becomes free, especially never married ones .Ex wives on the other hand are told we can manage, but from my experience nobody actually gives a hoot about us or cares if WE'D like a new relationship. The tight circle we were in also encouraged him while completely ignoring me and other women whose ex husbands married really fast.
So I’m suppose to hook up with someone and since I’m hooking up with them I won’t hook up with anyone else while he is hooking up with other people…? Whaaat?
Elliot I'm going to disagree with you here. A lot of men remarry quickly after divorce and often come off desperate to start a new relationship. I've dated several divorced men that right away start talking about a long-term relationship, marriage. Also have male friends that remarried within a year after marriage. My female friends, rarely.Think women actually stay single much longer than men after divorce. Women often stay single long-term after divorce but most men will remarry. Christian men in particular remarry quickly. No matter its probably not smart for any woman to marry a newly divorce man.
most of the time you would be right. In movies, it happens. They find the love of their life after having been in a relationship. Sometimes it is true, yes most people think it's a "rebound". Most Likely it is, yes, but sometimes it can be the right one.
Oh it is definitely a rebound. Elliott is on spot about the rebound and its one of the phases that happens after divorce. Women should tread lightly if a newly divorced man, a year or two out, goes gaga over you.
Almost all my friends who are happly married now is the ones who got married right after a divorce...Even the ones who started their relationship when the man was seperated they married now. Happly. So, life doesn't work the way you explain. No rules when it comes to heart matters.. when love and chemistry strong,,it won't make much difference whether he has just came out from a 10 yr of serious relationship or 20 yrs of marriage with bunch of kids. Sometimes people know better what they want after they are 40--45-50 yo whereas when they got married 15-20 yrs ago, they didn't know who they are , what they wanted, they were confused, they didnt really know what love is etc..but still married that woman they are divorcing now. You are the real thing for them,,not the one they were married to as they are more mature now and more experienced with what they want and need.
Remember your comment saying that all your happily married friends started this just after a divorce? Well, I’d like your advice: I know this distant colleague for over 10 years and got intimate without sex 10 years ago. Then I started a family with a malignant narcissist that broke off during birth with many years of healing myself. The colleague kept texting every now and then as a friend and has left his own family of 20 years in 2024. We are compatible emotionally and intellectually. Now he contacted & met me and we started deep texting before he went on holiday with his grown kids. I told him, I can see myself in a relationship with him. How should I go about leaving him space to heal and stay in friend zone until he is ready for something serious. He said, he likes me as a person and dislikes being single, but I feel he needs time to grow (like I had)
This might be my guys situation just sitting and analyzing his actions It's been 15 months and I've seen him do just that "at the moment" thing and then pull away, I was wise enough to dodge the bullet. But I have been very very patient I felt he wasn't ready to settle down. I will say that yes their was a strong attraction at the beginning and feel that their still is but I will not act on it .
I am exactly in this situation. My question is whether I should be exclusive. We did agreed on exclusivities in the beginning but now he has pull back. He doesn’t make plans. He just visit me ad hoc once in two weeks. We dont text intensively just a hi how are you. Should I maintain exclusivity. I care abt him very much though. Pls advise
Sabrina he is using you. He only contacts you every two weeks and he doesn't even bother to have a proper conversation with you? He doesn't make plans with you? Girl, you deserve a man that can give you 100 per cent. This guy is giving you a few crumbs and you are allowing him to play you for a fool. It is not your job to help him 'Get Over' his ex or whatever else he needs help with........find yourself a man who is emotionally available.
A guy knows if he wants you to be his wife within 6 months to year of dating. If you all don't discuss marriage within that timeframe, it's best to say that he doesn't see you as wife material and to move on before you waste anymore precious time.
M1234 Why? What's the matter with Italians? An Italian guy rebounded me. He seemed eager to be with me in the beginning, and then, suddenly, he pulled away. Only after I pressured him, he told me that he got out of a relationship 3 months before he started dating me. I'm not waithing for him, but as I have never had the fainting-away experience before, it was traumatising, even more because he gave me the idea that there was hope. Indeed, he's the opposite of James Bond, not the most attractive guy around.
Damn! Makes total sense! I knew it! He came on so strong and wouldn’t take no for an answer with anything. So tell him goodbye!? Sounds like it. Too late. We consummated the relationship…:-/
Elliot, I think its important to recognize that as in most things in life, it depends. How long someone waits after divorce is dependent on the situation - which is as individual as the person. Was his heart broken, or was it a slow drifting apart where both ex partners lost feelings for each other? Or.. were they only married because of parental pressure or an unplanned pregnancy? In those cases, maybe they were never in love to begin with. There are so many variables that should figure into knowing when people are ready or not. It's not something we can put an exact timeframe on without taking the circumstances into consideration.
So I came out of a 3 year relationship half a year ago, and I feel like I've healed a lot, and am ready to date again. So I met this guy, and I caught myself liking him, and I feel like he might like me back. This is however, he just ended a 3 year relationship two months ago and he still has contact with his ex, and I don't really know how I should interpret that. I get staying friends with your exes, I do that too, but after only 2 moths? Is that too soon?
To me very different situations then others. My partner were mistaken make a pregnant women he was 17. So he decided stay for a responsible. What he told me since then he is regret stay with someone just because of children. He told me he trying get out of relationship many time but children involved and money and house he feel stuck. But now children are grow up he is very happy to leave her he waiting for 20 years to get out. was surprised he told me he never really loved her first place but business house mate. Some how I feel was bad for her also. Spending time with someone long but has a no feeling but feels like a responsible only. It was for me very strange that I thought that he is emotionally some how going to be sad and depressed but he is happy to out there. Not all relationship situations are same. What I remember he said finally i choose someone who i want to be not as a forced myself. So basically he stay as a forced himself. You shouldn't never stay with someone you don't love them. He is regret life pass and he didn't get out. Divorce sometimes good choose to some people.
So, if he was married for 20 years you shouldn't consider dating him for 10 years after he's divorced??? (As in 1/2 the time he was married)??? Great. Let's face it ladies... we're all screwed 🥺
wished i saw this earlier i got in a little argument with dude, He still talks to me but he forsure pulled back, hopefully if i slow things down it worksout, just worried he'll won't find someone else
Hello, Elliot! You had me until you said, “hook up”! LOL I agree with all the other things about hanging with a guy on the rebound except hooking up, as in sex. No. A high-value woman, IMHO, doesn’t have casual sex. Which is what it would be with a rebound guy. I would hang out and let him slowly get to know me. Not give too much too soon. Build the attraction and have fun. Whilst he is free to “hook up” with women who do not have my standards in the mean time since we aren’t serious or exclusive. I would still go out with him and have fun flirting but not overly teasing. Casual dating isn’t for mating! It’s to get acquainted. Part of the courting process. Love your channel, Elliot! 😁😁😁😉😉😉💕💕💕🦋🦋🦋🦋
Lol but yeah totally makes sense, and yes the 20s is where u have fun or supposed to. I have friends in their 20s the all still have fun no commitment in sight.
My fiancé got divorced the same month we met ... he is doing everything to get married again really we are getting married in a week (we know each other 4 moths ago) he had 3 months free ... by him self he dated before meeting me other women ... is he fine now ? should I cancel ? :P he seems to just want marriage to fix my papers and keep me around ... because we are from different countries 😝 help
Well but going out to have fun should be done with any men not only the ones just out of a relationship my god! Women should not go out with men to use them as a mean to have kids, their resources or whatever else. That is not a relationship by definition. That is doing to get/giving to get
Crystal Ahn hey I really love watching susan winters channel. Her advice is really refreshing and progressive. It took me a while to get in to her but now I’m addicted m.th-cam.com/users/susanewinter
I think it's important to note, if you're taking it slow and building "attraction" you're giving the guy(or girl) space to heal/tie loose emotional ends of their previous relationship. Sometimes he will slow it down, but you should too when he gets carried away. Sometimes the previous relationship was blocks someone from finding the right person, but you got to respect they need time. If they like you, they will come find you.
Krobe thanks. I needed to hear this. Currently talking to a guy I met online but we haven’t met in person yet to hang out, even though he’s told me he’d like to (just doesn’t know when). We’ve been texting consistently for about 3 weeks now. I guess “Slow and steady wins the race.” The thing is, he keeps asking when I’m free but doesn’t follow up with a plan to meet. So I don’t know what to make of it, or if I’m just overthinking things. 🤷🏻♀️
Never date a guy that just got out of a serious relationship! NEVER. DATE. A. GUY. THAT. JUST. GOT. OUT. OF. A . SERIOUS. RELATIONSHIP.
J e n why
@@ruramuchenga4623 bc u can never compare
Met a guy on match. I was getting mixed messages but he was saying really nice things and seemed enamored. But he again should mixed messages and I pulled back. Sure enough he just confirmed he is still struggling from his breakup from a recent relationship..only three months since his breakup. I am bummed. But lesson learned..
Define "just got out of". 1 year, 2 years, ??? 10 years???
There’s no definite answer. Every situation is different. Generally, the longer their previous relationship was, the longer you should stay away from them once it ends, unless you wanna get your heart broken🤣
Take this info with a grain of salt... when I met my now husband, at the time he was finalizing his divorce.
He was like none of what is being said here... we have an amazing relationship and marriage. Been married 19 yrs now.
He left her .
If he gets abandoned is different
I agree...I believe that some men really appreciate being in a relationship... this isnt for 100% of men.
He is talking about low ego men
Why would he jump in another relationship?!! Well why would I give my body to a guy that doesn’t want a relationship?
Ciao boy, go and play with yourself.
If all women were strong enough to resist dating these men, they wouldn’t want to remain single for that long.
I want freedom but still want a warm body! Go have your freedom without me.
If all women said no, his freedom would not mean more women
Exactly
How to date a guy who just got out of a relationship: Don't.
Problem solved 😂
Brittani Bamrick hahaha...exactly
So can we trust them ,,I date a guy for 3 months and I didn't know that he had a girlfriend after that we break up and I move on after 2 months he break up with his girlfriend and he came to me again and he break with his girlfriend for 15 days can be in relationship with him? How can believed him
@@rachelngoy8011 Don't waste your time with him anymore..You are just an option not priority. Don't settle for less.
@@rachelngoy8011 He using ya
I got into a relationship with a guy who just got divorced. I was with him for six years, and it was wonderful. He had a bad accident and passed away. I miss him so much
My ex husband and I were married 12 years and two months after our split he started dating someone else.. they’ve now been together 7 years and married one year 🤷🏻♀️
I was married for over 12 and my ex married the woman he cheated on me with and got her pregnant. They are now married for 1 year.
@@mycatsnameiskaren8253 I posted this 3 years ago 🤯.. you know what tho my ex husband tried to get back with me during the lockdown in June and keeps flirting with me which I found hilarious!! Safe to say I told him where to go as there’s no way I’d get back with him.. still a power trip for me lol
@Jenny Agrippa 😂😂💁🏻♀️
They were already dating before you split, but that's a nice story.
Update 2021... so in January 2021 we found out that my ex husband has been cheating on his current wife with a woman he works with! This started last September and the woman came to his door in January and told my ex’s wife! (The wife is the woman he was dating two months after leaving me but I’m sure he was seeing her when we were together) as it stands because of their financial predicament the wife has given him another chance lol but I’ve also found out that the wife has a 20 thousand gambling debt so hence keeping him around to pay it off! It’s all been so overwhelming for me it was like the situation was repeating itself but I was the outside viewer. Madness
Elliot is right ladies speaking from experience
don’t let them sweet talk you
once they get you and the excitement wears off they’re gone or have pulled away to the next thing that excites them. Enjoy yourself be with a guy who is emotionally mature and has moved on from his divorce. Do not entertain a guy that has yet to let go they need time! don’t be the rebound. Wishing you all the best and you deserve the best!
Elliot is low key hilarious. Like he’s always right and that’s why I watch lol but he’s entertaining af too
Okay, you are all like don't date a guy who just got out of a relationship but guest what... THAT IS THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE. Most people dont remain single.
This!!💯💯
He just got out of a long relationship, I been single for the most part of 8 years. I'm just enjoying getting go know him and learn him. I'm in no rush and want him to get over what ever he needs to. Our dates are fun and amazing... we talk a few times a day and text, praying I'm not just a void filler....
What ended up happening? Did you stay with the guy?
@@happygolucky9004 I want to know the same!
This is such BS. I just got out of a 3 year Relationship. What I learned was to not ignore red flags and go with my gut. I understand so much more of what I want in a women. Yes I plan on playing the field but I would absolutely end that for the right women. I don't need a year to play the field to know what I want.
Thank you lol
I have been burned so many times by men freaking out once I start to reciprocate their emotions. I am crystal clear up front that (a) I am emotionally incapable of handling casual sex (and I have accepted that’s how I’m wired), and (b) I’m looking for a long-term relationship. So to be honest, your advice to keep it casual and “hook up” to build the attraction really rubs me the wrong way. I have made the mistake of having sex too soon because his words and actions all told me that he wanted what I want, only to end up with him flipping a switch and getting ghosted or him just losing interest, and me feeling used and hurt. So I changed my policy to, you don’t get to sleep with me unless you’re ready to love me. I have noticed that a lot of these videos are geared toward women having to change themselves to work with men and that also doesn’t sit right with me. I shouldn’t have to shove my own needs and desires aside to walk on eggshells and hope I get the guy, like he’s a prize and somehow above me. I have a lot to offer, and I’m a damn good catch. I have dealt with a lot of bullshit in dating but am a firm believer that the right person will love me for me, and I won’t have to play games, bend over backwards to accommodate his “live in the moment” mentality, or deny myself to get that result. I believe I have finally found the right man, but we just got into a relationship, so time will tell.
You need to watch Kev Hicks.
I'm the same way. I don't like to be a casual hook up. It makes me feel used and hurt.
I was thinking the same I can’t have casual sex And have fun. So I need to figure out a work around on that part.
I'm the same way..I'm not casual n fun. Tell em to go get a hooker😅😅
This man told no lies once again!
Wish I saw this 2 months ago! Would've saved myself from heartbreak 😥
Same. And the regrets of putting nail in the coffin because I am so pissed off at his actions
Me too
For me three years agoe
SAME here. I was the rebound. We dated 6 months. I tried so hard to "take it slow" because I knew he was healing and just out of a relationship. But, I did start to put pressure on at the end as I wasn't getting my needs met in the relationship. He broke up with me just before Christmas. It really hurts.
You’re so pretty girl HIS loss
Yesss E, you preached on that one!!Out of all the dating advice coaches no lie your are hands down thee best 1000!!!
Good news is its likely he will come back once hes over it. Just wait for it. Happens to me all the time
how long did it take for him to come back?
You are so right Elliott! I found being not so available and never pressuring him also opens him up more because he doesnt feel pressured! It's a hard thing to learn to do but if you just let it flow and let him talk about relationship material it will happen!
Ur right 1000% my x husband told me the exact things ur saying!! Right after our divorced he was dating a girl that he was trying to get rid off!! Cause HE WANTED HIS FREEDOM
"You have a court case in 4 months, then build your case" That's awesome sauce advice!
Great, I'm interested in a young man who just got out of an on-off troubled relationship and he seems quite interested, but he himself told me he would need time to be stable again and I found that very honest of him. Glad I found this video to add on how I'm coping with it. Not rushing anything, respecting his time (for him AND me), nothing good gets away and the most important thing is making a great impression. I just know he won't forget me and I leave it be. Trying to eat it while it's too hot however can cause some bad injuries.
Beatrix Oliveira hi what happened now? Did you guys date?
I think if you're looking for something lighthearted, "being" with him is not as bad. I seem to always involved with guys just got of out relationship. We shared decent connection tbh, but I always keep my head grounded and pause at the right time.
I clicked this mug so frickin fast!! The video I need desperately lol😩😭
CarlaRenee Burrel lol girl same!!!
Fabiola De Santiago 😂😂😂😂😂
This applies for the guy I'm dating rn but I also see daily guys go from one relationship to the next over night. The window of opportunity with quality single men is really small.
So are you saying just keep dating the newly single guy and take it slow? Or just tell
him to enjoy his singlehood for now and get back to me after a yr? And we’ll see if we’re both avaialable and still attracted to each other?
Firsf half of the video, “Yes, absolutely”. Second half: no woman should ever consume herself with how to appropriately tiptoe around any man in an effort to play a game to get him to be “addicted” to her, to circumvent the adult growing and healing such a “man” needs to do. Any many who behaves this way IS WRONG and wildly reckless and irresponsible. He needs to take time off and deal with solitude, or ONLY engage women who are absolutely and honestly looking for nothing serious, themselves. Suggesting “hanging out AND hooking up at the same time WITH an agenda will *always always always* lead to attachment and being in a mess and things ending with the poor, trusting woman in this scenario ending up feeling USED, because she WAS. Every. Single. Time. Ladies, if a man tells you he has been divorced less than 1 yr (even THAT is risky), do NOT let FOMO and Futute Faking get the best of you. Just RUN. R U N .
I totally agree who wants to be a booty call and a rebound.. I've told some guys go get you a prostitute you can pay them have sex and go y'all separate ways fr..
The “freedom” part doesn’t take into account the fact that there are men who don’t want to be single. Not all of em chose to be divorced/broken up with. So if there’s a reason not to date him right away it’s not because he needs freedom it’s because he needs to heal and get over his ex. I was a rebound and got left when he went back to her. Stay vigilant out there ladies lol.
What if we both are each other’s rebounds and both just got out of relationships🤔 I’d rather just play the waiting game since I want to wait myself
Maybe she broke up with him and he never wanted freedom
Wow, you are on fire with these vids! Could of used this 2 weeks ago. Eh, on second thought, he was kinda boring 😂. I figured out the BS and dropped it like it's hot 🔥haha.
My ex (22 years of 'marriage') married within a year of our divorce. Seems to have sailed into the sunset with her(twelve years already). These type of guys marry quickly to keep up the facade that he was so desirable, such a great catch), they would surely crumble if they didn't. There are always women lining up the minute a man becomes free, especially never married ones .Ex wives on the other hand are told we can manage, but from my experience nobody actually gives a hoot about us or cares if WE'D like a new relationship. The tight circle we were in also encouraged him while completely ignoring me and other women whose ex husbands married really fast.
Never 👏🏼 date 👏🏼 emotionally👏🏼unavailable👏🏼men👏🏼
So I’m suppose to hook up with someone and since I’m hooking up with them I won’t hook up with anyone else while he is hooking up with other people…? Whaaat?
You just saved my life thank you. I’m the type to drink my liver away in heartbreak
Thank you so much. This really helped me today. I’m going to play the long game w/him. And I’m staying off my back until he’s sufficiently addicted.😉
Good video and very easy to be understood! Thanks!
My Bf was just out of a Divorce, when we meet , we
have been dating going on 4 years. And you are total right ladies please give him that time....
How long have you given him the time, and are you committed to marriage by now?
Elliot I'm going to disagree with you here. A lot of men remarry quickly after divorce and often come off desperate to start a new relationship. I've dated several divorced men that right away start talking about a long-term relationship, marriage. Also have male friends that remarried within a year after marriage. My female friends, rarely.Think women actually stay single much longer than men after divorce. Women often stay single long-term after divorce but most men will remarry. Christian men in particular remarry quickly. No matter its probably not smart for any woman to marry a newly divorce man.
Guess you missed that part that they started early on talking about marriage? One proposed marriage. I thought they were moving too fast and moved on.
most of the time you would be right. In movies, it happens. They find the love of their life after having been in a relationship. Sometimes it is true, yes most people think it's a "rebound". Most Likely it is, yes, but sometimes it can be the right one.
Oh it is definitely a rebound. Elliott is on spot about the rebound and its one of the phases that happens after divorce. Women should tread lightly if a newly divorced man, a year or two out, goes gaga over you.
Almost all my friends who are happly married now is the ones who got married right after a divorce...Even the ones who started their relationship when the man was seperated they married now. Happly. So, life doesn't work the way you explain. No rules when it comes to heart matters.. when love and chemistry strong,,it won't make much difference whether he has just came out from a 10 yr of serious relationship or 20 yrs of marriage with bunch of kids. Sometimes people know better what they want after they are 40--45-50 yo whereas when they got married 15-20 yrs ago, they didn't know who they are , what they wanted, they were confused, they didnt really know what love is etc..but still married that woman they are divorcing now. You are the real thing for them,,not the one they were married to as they are more mature now and more experienced with what they want and need.
Remember your comment saying that all your happily married friends started this just after a divorce? Well, I’d like your advice: I know this distant colleague for over 10 years and got intimate without sex 10 years ago. Then I started a family with a malignant narcissist that broke off during birth with many years of healing myself. The colleague kept texting every now and then as a friend and has left his own family of 20 years in 2024. We are compatible emotionally and intellectually. Now he contacted & met me and we started deep texting before he went on holiday with his grown kids. I told him, I can see myself in a relationship with him. How should I go about leaving him space to heal and stay in friend zone until he is ready for something serious. He said, he likes me as a person and dislikes being single, but I feel he needs time to grow (like I had)
Watching you a lil bit. You’re definitely evolving. I enjoy the psych game
After watching this video , his mixed signals are making sense! Thank you!
I don’t know about y’all but I love Elliot videos!! 😂😂😂
I love how you keep it soooo REAL.
This is GOLD!! Thank you Elliott
Very well said Elliot.... straight to the point... true that
Worse case scenario, he goes back to his ex🤣💔
This might be my guys situation just sitting and analyzing his actions It's been 15 months and I've seen him do just that "at the moment" thing and then pull away, I was wise enough to dodge the bullet. But I have been very very patient I felt he wasn't ready to settle down. I will say that yes their was a strong attraction at the beginning and feel that their still is but I will not act on it .
Except a narcissist.
k meg EXACTLY ...I AGREE
Good video hun😘
I love that you and your videos are here. Thank you Elliot. I will continue to focus on what you've shared about attraction...the long game.
How to date a man who just got out of a relationship? Simple. DONT!
Love your vids Elliot! Always look forward to new ones! :)
This was sooooo good!!
Yes, a very much waited video from Elliot!
I am exactly in this situation. My question is whether I should be exclusive. We did agreed on exclusivities in the beginning but now he has pull back. He doesn’t make plans. He just visit me ad hoc once in two weeks. We dont text intensively just a hi how are you. Should I maintain exclusivity. I care abt him very much though. Pls advise
Sabrina he is using you. He only contacts you every two weeks and he doesn't even bother to have a proper conversation with you? He doesn't make plans with you?
Girl, you deserve a man that can give you 100 per cent. This guy is giving you a few crumbs and you are allowing him to play you for a fool.
It is not your job to help him 'Get Over' his ex or whatever else he needs help with........find yourself a man who is emotionally available.
best video, pure and straight to the point yet realistic. Thank you :)
Super helpful! And this my favorite look on you 😍👌
Good video need to put it in practice with the element that is long distance 😂
what can you do if you go up with him in the intensity & then pulls away? is there a way to get him back by pulling back yourself??
ThAnKs 🙌
I totally appreciate your videos!
Hello .i want serious relationship.I want a girl who really loves me. Even if she is divorced
Wow this was so informative.
Hes been honest he needs time.. Im waiting but cant help but to want him
In 4 out of 5 long term (years) relationships I got out of, the guy Married the Very Next girl he dated!!! Please explain?!!
red flag
A guy knows if he wants you to be his wife within 6 months to year of dating. If you all don't discuss marriage within that timeframe, it's best to say that he doesn't see you as wife material and to move on before you waste anymore precious time.
S Smith u weren't the one for him
M1234 Your reply makes a lot of sense in my situation. Thank you.
M1234 Why? What's the matter with Italians? An Italian guy rebounded me. He seemed eager to be with me in the beginning, and then, suddenly, he pulled away. Only after I pressured him, he told me that he got out of a relationship 3 months before he started dating me. I'm not waithing for him, but as I have never had the fainting-away experience before, it was traumatising, even more because he gave me the idea that there was hope. Indeed, he's the opposite of James Bond, not the most attractive guy around.
oh, Elliot this video came at the right time! thank you love!
Damn! Makes total sense! I knew it! He came on so strong and wouldn’t take no for an answer with anything. So tell him goodbye!? Sounds like it. Too late. We consummated the relationship…:-/
I love your charts. Visuals help me
Elliot, I think its important to recognize that as in most things in life, it depends. How long someone waits after divorce is dependent on the situation - which is as individual as the person. Was his heart broken, or was it a slow drifting apart where both ex partners lost feelings for each other? Or.. were they only married because of parental pressure or an unplanned pregnancy? In those cases, maybe they were never in love to begin with. There are so many variables that should figure into knowing when people are ready or not. It's not something we can put an exact timeframe on without taking the circumstances into consideration.
You are on fire lately!
Older men marry those rebounds LMFAO....
Thank you so much. This came in the perfect timing 😘
Amazing stuff. You're the best!
So I came out of a 3 year relationship half a year ago, and I feel like I've healed a lot, and am ready to date again.
So I met this guy, and I caught myself liking him, and I feel like he might like me back. This is however, he just ended a 3 year relationship two months ago and he still has contact with his ex, and I don't really know how I should interpret that. I get staying friends with your exes, I do that too, but after only 2 moths? Is that too soon?
Yup I'm a rebound 😒
This is good info!
You look great in this video :) you've got great insight. Particularly if you have not researched psychology :)
This is a very good video.
Always spot on, Elliot ☺️
Amen! Thank You ❣️
To me very different situations then others. My partner were mistaken make a pregnant women he was 17. So he decided stay for a responsible. What he told me since then he is regret stay with someone just because of children. He told me he trying get out of relationship many time but children involved and money and house he feel stuck. But now children are grow up he is very happy to leave her he waiting for 20 years to get out. was surprised he told me he never really loved her first place but business house mate. Some how I feel was bad for her also. Spending time with someone long but has a no feeling but feels like a responsible only.
It was for me very strange that I thought that he is emotionally some how going to be sad and depressed but he is happy to out there.
Not all relationship situations are same. What I remember he said finally i choose someone who i want to be not as a forced myself. So basically he stay as a forced himself. You shouldn't never stay with someone you don't love them. He is regret life pass and he didn't get out. Divorce sometimes good choose to some people.
Very true.
QUESTION.. @ 11:00, you say 6-8 weeks, then pop the question
What question?
Girl I was tripping when I heard that too what is he talking about😅😅😅
You make good sense
I really agree with you.Its the truth.yes indeed.
So, if he was married for 20 years you shouldn't consider dating him for 10 years after he's divorced??? (As in 1/2 the time he was married)??? Great. Let's face it ladies... we're all screwed 🥺
This is my favorite video thank u
How long do we wait? Normally 6 to 8 dates. So 12 to 16? 18 to 24?
I wish I had found this before I became his rebound.
Professor scott!!!! 🤓😍🤗
OK so what happens if he did this we stop seeing each other. How do I get him back? Or will he come back? It's been 2months we dated 8 months
wished i saw this earlier i got in a little argument with dude, He still talks to me but he forsure pulled back, hopefully if i slow things down it worksout, just worried he'll won't find someone else
you are 200% right
Hello, Elliot! You had me until you said, “hook up”! LOL I agree with all the other things about hanging with a guy on the rebound except hooking up, as in sex. No. A high-value woman, IMHO, doesn’t have casual sex. Which is what it would be with a rebound guy. I would hang out and let him slowly get to know me. Not give too much too soon. Build the attraction and have fun. Whilst he is free to “hook up” with women who do not have my standards in the mean time since we aren’t serious or exclusive. I would still go out with him and have fun flirting but not overly teasing. Casual dating isn’t for mating! It’s to get acquainted. Part of the courting process. Love your channel, Elliot! 😁😁😁😉😉😉💕💕💕🦋🦋🦋🦋
I want one on one but cannot open the page!!! SOS
He came out from 1 year relationship and he told me that he likes me and doesn’t want to commit yet.. So should i stay or should i leave
Leave
Great advice as always!!
Lol but yeah totally makes sense, and yes the 20s is where u have fun or supposed to. I have friends in their 20s the all still have fun no commitment in sight.
Soooooo true 100%
My fiancé got divorced the same month we met ... he is doing everything to get married again really we are getting married in a week (we know each other 4 moths ago) he had 3 months free ... by him self he dated before meeting me other women ... is he fine now ? should I cancel ? :P he seems to just want marriage to fix my papers and keep me around ... because we are from different countries 😝 help
What happened? This sounds like a rebound.
Did you guys get married?
Lmao when he drew the flag
Well but going out to have fun should be done with any men not only the ones just out of a relationship my god! Women should not go out with men to use them as a mean to have kids, their resources or whatever else. That is not a relationship by definition. That is doing to get/giving to get
Been there 2 mths have to start over..
Welp if the guy isn’t attracted to you thennn you can’t ever have him no matter what 🤷🏻♀️
Say it for the ones in the back💯💯
Can anyone recommend me similar podcasts or blogs like this channel?
Crystal Ahn hey I really love watching susan winters channel. Her advice is really refreshing and progressive. It took me a while to get in to her but now I’m addicted
m.th-cam.com/users/susanewinter
I would advise you to stick to Elliot. He is the most simple and realistic out there imo.