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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 มิ.ย. 2024
- A master manipulator refers to a person who has a high level of skill in manipulating or influencing others to get what they want or to achieve their goals. They often use techniques such as emotional appeals, flattery, persuasion, or misleading information to control or exploit others. Such behavior can be unethical and damaging to the people being manipulated. Do you have a master manipulator in your life without even knowing it? To help you prevent this and remove yourself from emotional manipulation, in this video, we'll be discussing the signs you're dealing with a master manipulator.
Disclaimer: Please keep in mind that this video serves as general guidance purely for educational purposes, and is not to be taken as a substitute for professional advice or assistance.
Here are a few examples of emotional manipulation. Watch this video to find out: • 7 Examples Of Emotiona...
Writer: Aditi Nambiar
Editor: Isadora Ho & Kelly Soong
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
Voice :Amanda Silvera ( / amandasilvera )
Animator: Mharz B. (new animator)
TH-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
REFERENCES:
psych2go.net/7-signs-of-an-em...
Do you have a story about being manipulated and how you overcame that?
I was bullied by a guy in high school, it affected me emotionally & made me an introvèrt & my academic performance declined. I am in college, now & the effect is still there.😪
Definitely, a recent situation, but they didn’t think I’d wise up and realize I was being used and leave that relationship for my own health
I was having manipulator that saying they are friend with me and my friend that have relationship with the manipulator is make me felt bad and how I overcome is stay away form them two and just being friends with my true friend
One of my family members knew I will go to the college but she never ask me out to talk about college stuffs or buying for it.
I was so done to deal with her and then I told the truth to one of my lecturers who also help to organize college events at that time. When my lecturer asked more, I didn't answer.
A few days later, the staff from my college called the family member and then she called me and guess what? She was so mad.
She said, "Please stop talking bad about me!", "Oh, how could you do this to me?!" and she played dumb, "Why you didn't tell me about you wanna go to the college?"
Excuse me, madam? Tell me how I want to tell this college news when SHE made me isolated from others and outside of the world. Also, before I told my lecturer and let her know, I told this to my sister but she always denied what I was talking about and made me asking my sanity.
This is made my trust issues get worst and long story short, I'm at the college now. Despite the news that my uncle passed away at last month, I'm being here. Not easy to handle, but I can get through it.
I am the manipulator...I plan, think and execute the manipulation calmly so that others aren't aware of it.. But then, I am doing this for their own good
1) They are too much too soon
2) They pretend to be concerned
3) They refuse to help resolve problems
4) They gashlight you
5) They isolate you from others
6) They know your weaknesses and can use them against you
7) They guilt trip you
the envirnments these people come from are places where they had to manipulate the world around them to have their basic needs met =/ some people fight with conditional and unconditional love, but others have none and had to fight for basic attention even emotionless attention. Master manipulators are often children to emotionally unavailable parents, psychopaths and narcissist's who they had to constantly please to feel validated and that pleasing came with the need to manipulate, lie, steal, because all those things would be things that such a parent would actually respect, oddly enough because they sure wont respect pleas for emotion.
So my older sister is a master manipulator, I guess... Because she does all of these things
Sounds like my aunt with my mother. Yes, she was a narc
@@andromeda45188 it's unlisted and for people who are members and whatnot
Sounds like my ex
Manipulators never failed to make my blood boil when i figure them out again
What about manipulators who managed to manipulate the entirely of society.
@@Xenomorph-hb4zf yeah they are actually fear of being exposed of manipulating someone
nothing is more dangerous than being SEEN by someone who knows you see them either. I once had a LITERAL death stare down with a manipulative woman once because I refused to play her game of control and she knew it. I beat her at her own game because I could predict the outcome. Her power came from getting to her husband first to manipulate his perspective so I went to him first, explained she was upset, explained the situation and she got MAD at me for doing that. Interesting. You know what her husband told me one day? He apologized, said, "she's a very strong willed person." which is another way of saying " a bitch" aka borderline personality.
@@andromeda45188 Either a membership or this video was privated for some reason
@@CircumcisionIsChildAbuse
Having BPD doesn't automatically make someone a bad person. Heck, having any mental disorder doesn't
Associations like this is why people are afraid to get diagnosed. When they should get diagnosed to understand themselves better
I'm not saying its okay what she did, it most certainly wasn't. The bpd isn't the reason she acted like that though. It may have contributed to it, but ultimately that's on her for being, as you put it, a bitch
Eat like you love yourself. Move like you love yourself. Speak like you love yourself. Act like your love yourself. Love yourself.
:)
Boom 💥
Thank you
Must be nice
❤
I accidentally let a manipulator into my life through lack of personal boundaries. Thought we were friends and things were fine, until I stopped meeting their unreasonable expectations and all of a sudden they became more overt with constant guilt tripping. I didn't even realize what was happening until I started wondering why I consistently felt stressed, anxious and just generally worse after interacting with them, in contrast to my other friends who always brought joy into my life.
I felt way better after I educated myself and realized why I felt that way, what was really going on and was able to put a name to some of their manipulative behaviors. Since then I've been doing so much better when it comes to dealing with them. Big lesson learned to not be afraid to stand up for my personal boundaries from the get go.
Yes, exactly. It's like they're drowning and when you go to help, they end up pulling the both of you down. It's hard not to empathize with them, but our needs absolutely need to come first.
Hey same it happened during my teenage when I was a bit hot headed and was trying to improve then a toxic guy came and ruined my academic year (ruined my mental state) he was too toxic and narcissistic not to mention he had every last quality mentioned in this video ( even though I'm seeing this now) then the very next year I took control and showed him my worst possible side and didn't give a shit to him got disconnected from him , blocked him in every possible way and in the end with a few friends I bullied the crap out of him since he had no friends and was trying to prey on others as well. I know I went a bit overboard but I was just mentally irritated that year with a lot of things going around. I'm not proud of my actions and will never be I just did what I thought that time would be the best.
@@KingEdwardMD and the worst part is they pretend like they're your friend and convince you that they are and later try to sabotage you , making yourself feel guilty and this is the worst kind you should stay away from . Somebody said it right a known enemy is better than an unknown friend( who's not a friend lol)
The same thng is happening to me right now. I met a new friend at school and we seem to be close but later on I feel like she always has something to argue with me. Even though we have the same opinion for things she always finds something to argue and me being me I tend to like just agree with her even though I don't really meant it. Now I kind of want to distance myself with her but I realized that I somewhat fell out with my other friends and now I'm all by myself.
Update😀
I stopped going with that person and started to make amends with my circle of friends but they just told me yesterday (April 14, 2023) that they don't want me to be their friend anymore🙃 And I'm now officially alone💔
So maybe I really am the problem not them🙂
It is kinda sad that empath people usually attracts manipulators . It is kinda of curse 😢
That's not how it happens. You're crazy
Unconcious empaths 100% attract manipulators / narcissists. But once empaths become conscious and fully emporwered, we are the narcissists worse nightmares!
@@rya7642Asshole 😂 Good joke though
@@Ervinabrahamian😂😂 right? Was gonna say oh we got a bitch here? Oh wait. Sarcasm is a thing 😂 that was funny.
I'm an empath, and I think I've attracted every narcissist and manipulator in my school. It is a curse, but im hoping that with practice, I'll be a nightmare for people like that. I just started to realize that my best friend for the last two years is a manipulator it's sad, and it hurts a lot, but he isolated me from so many people I truly care about. I need to get away from him and be able to identify these signs faster
Timestamps
1). They are too much too such 1:27
2). They pretend to be concerned 2:48
3). They refuse to help solve problems 3:26
4). They gaslight you 4:51
5). They isolate you from others 5:55
6). They know your weaknesses and can use them against you 6:57
7). They guilt trip you 8:10
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@Souven Tudu not a problem happy to help
"too much too such"
dude is speaking the language of the drowned gods rn
@@Eye5x5 okay
Nail on the head!! I got suckered into this behavior 15 years ago. Some manipulators are BRILLIANT at what they do. The task of unlearning what I thought was "wrong with me" is painful and difficult. I will persevere!!!
This hits a spot :( I don't know if I am in the wrong. I'm still tryna figure that out. It just hurts. My head hurts. I don't want to think anymore.
I don't even know what I feel anymore lol
In the video it says that being around someone like that can cause depression ,I believe it can cause more than depression if you stay in the cycle too long. Especially if weed or any other drugs are involved.. reality is fragmented and it never really feels the same again. A part of you is missing. A huge chunk of your life that you either can't remember with how chaotic things would be, it's scrambled with your "reality" their reality and the battles in your head of questioning yourself if they are right and you don't know yourself, or you just can't bear to think back to. You're a different person but it is impossible to keep hold of reality and being out of touch so long...everything just gets real dark
@@AlienDucky00 . Being caught up in this type of relationship definitely can cause depression, anxiety and even physical illnesses. It happened to my mother with my drug addicted nephew.
They are called “Master”manipulators for this reason.
It's not good to give up your life and sanity for a person who hurts you that much
at all
Everyone knows. But sometimes these types of people mess with your head so much, they programme you to give up even without yourself realising.
SAY THIS LOUDER THAN EVER PLEASE
When u watch this and u realize what ur parent has done to you..
just dont give a shet. like actually.
Another unfortunate thing that happens after you've experienced manipulation is that you might repeat the pattern of falling for another manipulator. This happened to me a few months after parting ways with an emotionally abusive friend. First time was years, second time months and now i'm very sensitive to perceived manipulation. The distrust you experience in yourself and others isn't fun, but learn from it. Write down your boundaries and read them often. Get intentional with who you are and what you will accept in your life. It may feel like the biggest loss and hole in you right now but this is an immense opportunity to carve out a future for YOU!
Who do YOU want to be?
Where do YOU see yourself?
What is YOUR idea of your best you?
Go for it! Shed the people who do anything less than encourage you to be yourself
You got this
I grew up among manipulators and was raised to be one myself, and/or to collude with the others' manipulation of myself and others. What a horror to wake up to the truth of these dynamics...the view of life as a zero sum game. This awakening ultimately led me to cut ties with most of my family and friends.
I relate to you so much, I just cut my entire family out for the same reason and am trying to be mindful of my actions from now on. How long have you gone no contact and how are you holding up? I'm only 8 days in and it hasn't been easy, lot of emotions and feelings of worthlessness.
I'm an emotional manipulator, I can't fix my past relationships, but I'm learning how to break the cycle and be a better person.
Just dropping in because someone needs to congratulate you for doing the work required to achieve this level of self-awareness. It's rare in situations like this - congratulations on breaking the cycle :)
I’m glad you were able to escape that hell and recognize healthy boundaries. That’s never an easy thing to do. You took a big step. And even though none of us will ever know you, just know we are proud of you. Keep up the good work and live a full life.
The guilt after the fact too.
It's awful.
I've pushed away people I cared for from it.
I'd give anything to take it back.
Now imagine it's normalized for adults or people older than you in your culture. Yes, it is. And if you try getting out of it, you're disrespectful and rude for standing up for yourself and setting boundaries. You're supposed to live the life your elders want to, even if you're an adult, they won't let you live. When you're weak, they'll help you out and than tell you to do what they say, because they know better. And after a conflict, if you wanna talk about that and work through, they say that you're trying to ruin the relationship and hurting their feelings.
Very good point. Authority figures sometimes manipulate others whether they realize it or not. In your personal opinion, how do you think we can protect ourselves from adults or authority figures who may be trying to manipulate us?
Basically Philippines
@@Psych2go I guess, as soon as you're an adult and can actually move out, that's where you start. That helps to stop all the gaslighting and you can clear your head from blaming yourself for every single thing. If it doesn't help, there's probably no other choice than cutting of the relationship.
That's something I did, I tried my best to communicate and made sure that they got my point. I was even guilt-tripped for manipulating them, when I explained that if they continued invading my personal space, trying to get me married, making me do things I don't want to, I'd just stop responding to their calls and messages forever and never come to their place again. I know it may sound brutal, but whenever I responded or came, every conversation would end up with "You're so selfish. How can you hurt me like this? I'm so disappointed in you. You don't care about us at all, I'm embarrassed because of you...", and I constantly blamed myself for embarrassing and hurting them, so I had to stop it somehow.
@@mural_bakh well said mate.
Exactly. I'm a teenager and Ive dealt with this while growing up, when adults are telling you that they are superior to you, talking to you as if you are slow or stupid of incompetent, or younger than you are, or behaving as if they are in authority or control of your identity, beliefs, your thoughts, feelings, body, and your entire life and how you will live once you grow up. I grew up around a few manipulators so as time went on, I learned what they were doing and I Figured out how to work my away around that kind of mess and stay true to myself and stand my ground and so on.
If you think about it, your parents cannot control you. At the end of the day, you are capable of doing many many things, there are just (legal) restrictions in place, and people blocking you[people, including yourself..] from doing things which lowers the chance of you being able to do it without consequences or trouble. This applies even when you're not a child or teenager/adolescent. However, just because you're capable of doing something, or atleast making an attempt at it, it doesn't mean you should always try to do that thing
Of course there are times where you should listen to your parents, but it's not a flat-out "always listen/obey to your parents" thing. Or a flat-out "never listen/obey your parents". This has a middle ground and/or it includes many shades of gray when it comes to this whole thing. An example would be; if your mom told you to smack a child in the face, it wouldn't be logical to obey this order based off the fact that she's your mother. I believe when it comes down to respecting authority, its much more than their assigned titles.
When I show respect to my mom, or listen to her, it's not a "shes my mother" thing. I'm not saying that cant be a reason, but my reason for respecting (reasonable) authority and reasonable orders have a much deeper foundation than just because their titles.
My son got into a uni 'friendship' with someone like that and ended up moving in. Sharing a house made him aware of what was going on, it really got pretty intense, and I am proud to say, he removed himself very swiftly. It was a scary time!
This just helped me understand my situation I’m going through with my roommate so much better. She is definitely been emotional manipulating me and I’ve been going through the motions of being in a deep depression for a few month’s now because of her toxic manipulative ways. So I have been trying to do my best to put myself out there. To go out, have fun, and explore myself but with all the emotional turmoil it has been really hard to get out of my head. But if I learned anything through this process I am really getting to learn about myself and probably for the first time ever truly exploring who I am for me. But I have been feeling very weighed down by this situation and have allowed her to cross my boundaries way too many times. I am at a point where I am going to air my grievances and let it be what it is.
And your video has given me the courage to do so! 💪🏾
So thank you! Thank you! Thank you! ❤✨🌻
Just to let u know if she says anything to u after u have changed urself after watching this video thn don't let it effect u ( sorry my English is Little bit bad )
@@ducklin7204 I really appreciate that advice because I don’t want to keep this negativity in my heart or around me. I know things will change soon and I will continue to remain positive for myself now, until, and after they do. 😌🙏🏾✨☀️🌻💯
My Mom is very manipulative just quite literally because she would always try to control my life & as well by not allowing me to have some freedom to like that involves of actually by going over to a friend's house or even by going to bigger places like such as going out of town & even by going to mall too. And so that explains why that me & my mom cannot get along with each other just quite literally because we could be quite stubborn towards each other when especially during the arguments. So that explains why that I was not able to reach to her on the phone for a lot of specific reasons. And plus I am also 22 but going to be turning 23 like in the next three months right until now which is actually going to be on the 9th of August too. I was also born with a "high" functioning mild autism in real life. But happily I had to cut ties with my Mom physically, verbally & very emotional too & so it did brought me into pieces but for the most important part is the whole fact that I had to stay strong, very wise upbringing, mature young girl/lady & I am also very proud of myself too for having to deal with this most very difficult situation too indeed. I honestly did found this video very interesting & very helpful for sure indeed.
I have a person like this in my life right now, except I've already been through it, so they have started just leaving me alone. Stand up for yourself, even if it means getting the crap kicked out of you. Don't let people manipulate you or push you around. You're too important.
Anyone else found this through their newest video??
Yeah I did too. 42 views currently on the video. It's apparently unlisted.
Me
Hmm saw this in my notif. This been my healing acc for yrs now
Mine was through recommendations
Me
This is word for word, exactly what my ex roommate was like to me. Not only that but I had an emotional abusive babysitter
Master manipulator is what I call my ex-husband of 11 years. I thought he loved me, and he never did. He told me nothing in life was ever going to make him happy, so I might as well accept it or move on. Come to find out, he ended up having an affair and committing adultery with a teenage coworker of his. His entire family knew and supported him all behind my back, I was clueless. The one who vowed to protect me was the one who hurt me the most. Therapy and support does truly help to get through it!
This is what I had to go through. I was in a long distance "situationship" that lasted 2 years, I won't go into details but now I really feel like she was manipulating me.
If she was, I regret spending so much time on such a waste of a person. She put me in a trauma loop, I was hooked and my fault to not notice it at all.
Dont be too hard on yourself. I got out of an 8 year manipulative relationship about a year and a half ago.
We lived together, and she had an affair with the person who I considered my best friend.
All the signs on this video check of the behaviour she had towards me.
Now I'm in a better place with friends and family. The people that matter will help you through.
If I can do it, I know you can.
@@3110chappy I'm sorry for what happened to you and thanks for believing in be, I know I still have a lot of time to recover and find someone else
I also was in a situationship for like 6-7 months and he sucked me in with his words where I believed everything he said but realised that he isn't there when I really needed him. I even ended up in the mental hospital bc of him as he refused to talk to the police on my behalf. He was never there when I truly, really needed him. He took advantage of my vulnerability at that point, as I just got fired from my job and was looking for other jobs to do while he made me spend my savings I have saved over the span of few years which I could have used to move out, get a driving license but ended up spending almost every single cent on him and he kept hurting me, taking me for granted, sexualized and objectified my body, spoke more about my body rather than anything, and also sexually violated me in the sense that some of the sexual acts I wasn't really comfortable with, he coerced me into doing them. He gained the upper hand of my body and that felt like violation, I don't even know if that falls under sexual assault bc I gave my consent. He also toyed with my feelings and messed me up internally. 2-3 months into the relationship and something felt off. Couldn't even wrap my head around. Told my best friend and he suggested that I talk abt it to my ex. And my ex cleverly twisted the blame towards me and made me feel shittier than I was already feeling. I was at the lowest point in my life where I was too vulnerable to the point where I could recognize an arse like that few years back became close to him and violated almost every single boundary I kept intact for a very long time. And also he was all my firsts. Didn't expect my 1st rs to be this shitty tbh
Not your fault. It happens.
It’s so hard to see these traits in the person you “love” until you “wake up”. Been there done that and moved on. Now I see these traits in her so often it’s scary. She’s got herself in such a lie that she now cannot get out of living it. I feel sad that this is all she has as well as for anyone who enters a relationship in the future. I was sad for years. I’m happy again.
THIS GIRL HAS THE MOST AMAZING VOICE ON EARTH!
Who you are is evolving every day. Take care of yourself by tending to the basics. Sleep, hydration, nutrition, movement, rest, breathing, and gratitude. Keep to these tiny steps, and over time, you will emerge with a tremendous body of wisdom. Your vista is expanding, not just here across the Fabulous landscape, but for who you are in the world.
I'm quite sensitive to see who's manipulator and who's pure. I trust my intuition, though.
Last year, someone love-bombed me for months. Taking me to an art galery, complements and stuffs.
To me, the more extreme their love bombing is, the more obvious it is that there's something wrong with them
Trust your intuition, guys. They never lie
that is correct!
For a lot of people they never believe they had an intuition because they were raised to believe anything that come from them is wrong. So it takes time to regain confidence and trust themselves, so their intuition.
So good for you but it's harder for a lot of people out there.
@@AissataDCisse for real. That's how they're manipulated
My partner and I sometimes poke at each other, but we’re careful not to go too far. Usually, we poke ourselves. I actually dealt with manipulation from my mom. I keep my distance from her and rest of my immediate family. I’ve even gone as far as to tell my partner where I’ll be. He understands i can’t give a timeline. Call us crazy, but he, myself and my former coworkers have believed my family would try to kidnap me. I moved out with my fiancé last year for my own sake. For my health and safety. I put up with abuse for far too long. I can’t remember wording, but I was torn apart i think in December of last year when my mom said something about me being the manipulative one. It made me question it, as I’d actively been making sure i don’t over exaggerate anything and I’ve even told my partner “I wish some of the things I said were lies.” Unfortunately, they weren’t. Sorry for rambling…. I have a long road to recovery. I’m going to be 28 in June…. hopefully one day I can actually get help for my depression and anxiety and other stuff i deal with
Get well soon !! hope you recover from it and spend good times ahead with your fiance ... beginning a new life , new family , new moments to cherish . Stay safe & happy !! Also Happy BIrth day (advance or belated ) It's JUNE already !!🙂
It feels like every single one of these videos lately has become a glaring reminder of just how ingrained my abusers have become in my life; to uproot them would crumble the solidity of my livelihood like packed soil as it becomes loose and unable to bear the brunt… ☹️
I’ve been threw this. Isolated from everyone. Run as fast as you can and don’t look back!!
It's bad when both your parents are like this each in their own way. The people who are supposed to love you. But I'm gonna keep it short this time. Because I'm over it and they are not in my life anymore.
I have no intuition when it comes to people. I can not tell what they are thinking, can not detect sarcasm, can not read body language, do not understand dual meaning, nor can not detect when hints are given. In order to avoid undesireables trying to take something for me. I just deleted the social aspects of my life. Now it is impossible for me to ever become a victim to social predators again. Having a social life is a waste of time, resources, and effort. Friendships seemed important in elementary school. I outgrew the childish need for friends, having a, social life, needing the approval of the herd, and being. Dependent on the herd. I am no longer in elementary school and require no social life.
Everyone remember
If someone is telling you that they (for example) don't want to talk to you anymore, think if it's actually your fault or theirs
I had that gery recently when my friend told me out if the blue that ahe wanted to cut contact. I of course respected her decision but that meant that I couldn't ask what I did wrong, so I kept thinking what it was. After about 2 .months I thought that it may not be my fault and when I actively thought about it, it wasn't. I had put all the effort in the friendship and tried to make it fun qhile ahe did nothing and didn't even acknowledge my efforts. So in the end, it probably was better that way.
Still sucks but that feeling will go away with time
Sounds like my relationship. 😢
My manipulators told me I’m manipulative so now I watch videos like this to compare my behavior because I don’t want to be like them
I was in a 3 year long relationship with a emotional manipulator like this., honestly if you ever spot any of these signs or things please please get yourself out and away from them no matter what! They will destroy you mentally! I didn't see the signs until it was too late and I lost many good friends and good relationships with them and family. This video is great and thankyou for making this Psych2Go! Your videos have helped me alot! ❤
Same, wish I would've seen all the warning signs sooner. I ignored so much because I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt and surely they weren't really that bad deep down. Finally out of that situation, but lots of damage was done.
@@blacksesamecandies aw I'm sorry hun x, I feel you btw, just wanted to give them a chance and see past the signs but yeah it does ruin you eventually..
im so sorry you both
i had a master manipulator that hurt me and all my friends as well i pulled away after a lot of damage had been done too and now the narcisist hates me because i didint go back to them after they tried to gaslight me back into making my friends and i forgive them
well glad i think you guys are atleast doing well
Manipulators are the reason I can't bring myself to trust anyone enough to attempt another relationship.
The pain of being used, of being lied to, of everything wrong with the relationship being my fault... Not to mention the demolishment of my savings and some amazing friendships I had had... I don't doubt that the right person might be out there. But frankly, loneliness is preferable to the emptiness and confusion and dread that permeated all corners of my being.
This was very helpful 🙏🏼👏🏼
Very well layed out and on point.
Thank you. 👍🏽
Very awareness producing video! Thank you.
Me: You’re trying to guilt trip me
My dad: Oh, “guilt tripping” implies there’s something to feel guilty about
And tripping means it’s being used abusively
It is uniquely hard if the person is your parent, especially if there is no one else in the home but you, a minor with no ability to remove yourself from the situation. It can be beyond confusing, but remember you are not crazy, if you are in a situation like this please try and advocate for yourself, talk to adults you trust at school, friends parents you are close to. You deserve so much better, you deserve to feel safe. Stay strong and remember to love yourself and protect yourself first.
This is so good and cute illustrated. Thank you❤
I watched this video 6 months ago and at the time it woke me up to a scary reality that I suspected something was wrong but never knew what it was. I was being manipulated by a narcissist. I remember the extreme urge to leave and get away after I listened to this video. The facts and reality of things settled in and I was scared of what would happen if I stayed. This video made it impossible for me to stay, as it made it clear there was no questions about what was really going on. Thanks for making this video because it was one of the few things that saved me at that time. I’m in a much better place now.
This is literally my mother
This is literally my sister for 4 years 😢😅
Loved the video! Coincidentally my recent relationship was somehow in the sequence the video was made.
I felt terrible prioritising my own interests and needs over my partner’s and eventually I was controlled and was forced into doing things according to him.
And I gave up on my career in order to sustain the relationship.
One day I came up with a conversation about he being emotionally abusive, he guilt trapped me by saying that I’m the first person to pass up the comment that he is emotionally abhusive and everyone else says that he’s a sweet person.
I almost lost control over myself but luckily I somehow managed to escape from it.
I went through all this with my kids mom. I felt like I was the problem. I felt I was causing this woman so much grief,that I was just no good. Like I sat there and questioned myself. I wanted to get away but couldn’t. It was like she had a magnet and I was the metal. I just kept coming back. I didn’t know what to do. I just woke up one day and was tired. I said it’s going to hurt to leave but it hurts to stay. I just left. Yes it came with her keeping the kids away from me but in due time I know God is going to make away. I felt disgusted and mad at myself,especially when I look back and realize what I allowed myself to go through. It caused trauma and pain to existing trauma and pain. It’s crazy because it feels so good to get away. I could never look at her how I once did. I truly wanted to love her. I truly did but it was impossible.
It's sad when you can identify family members
My ex-wife, a psychologist of all things, showed many of these traits. A second marriage for her, she would occasionally admit that she had to be in control. It was a whirlwind courtship, but I thought because we were older, it'd be OK. An unfortunate disaster that I still haven't recovered from decades later despite therapy.
yikes and she is a psychologist as well
Very nice Video! It’s very informative, and very explanatory!❤️
Thankyou so much for this great video !!!! It was so interesting and helpful !!!!
💜💙💚💛🧡❤💜💙💚💛🧡❤💜💙💚💛🧡❤
Some the things on this list I can relate to. Im not gonna get into detail abt it, but I will say that Im really struggling to get better and move on from my idiotic actions. A few tips would be nice, tbh. Btw, I love your videos!
I always enjoy watching your informative videos about relationships. 👍 Self love is important. 👍
I'm trying to educate myself but your voice is so soothing I keep falling asleep 😅
Great! After being in my shell far too long and having general trust issues, for the first time in my life I want to be open, honest, more trusting and more compassionate right from the start, excited to realate to her struggles, not waiting too long for progress etc. and now this video ruins that by telling everyone that I might be an evil narcissist.
No matter what I do, it always seems wrong. I hope other people watch less such videos than I do!
Nice video! I can relate to this. Your videos help a lot!
I know someone who tried to isolate me from my loved ones. He wanted to control me. He used some of the tactics u mentioned, gas lighting, guilt tripping and physical, mental,emotional and even sexual abuse, it was awful! I have never suffered so much in my life. And when he saw his plans succeed, when he saw down he would smile.
He saw himself as sooo righteous, he's a rabbi. A highly famous one with a good name. And he would go on and preach like he is such a good person.
Im glad God gave me my freedom from this prick. I hope i never see him again!😢
This describes most of the people I have ever known. Since when hasn't a sibling, parent, guardian or relative done this? A red flag should be when they care too much, they're too interested and don't have business of their own to mind.
Ur Voice And Animation Is So Smooth!! :)
Currently working to get away from my emotionally manipulative, narcissistic ex boyfriend and current housemate.
I wish you the best of luck. Stay strong!
Just got out of 8 years of this. I'm so happy that I'm putting myself first. He convinced me to not have friendships with anyone. He knows my weaknesses and uses them against me. Not anymore. I deserve better
What a fantastic video I actually enjoyed it have a wonderful day
Very useful information!
Thank you for this video! 😄🌹
Scary on how accurate this video is 😢
I appreciate these videos. I watch them over and over again. I still partially like deny that it happened and go back into a cycle of blaming myself for the emotional abuse I've experienced. When it is not my fault the words they said were wrong. And I can grow.
I can't afford a therapist right meow because of insurance and things. So I like to watch these videos to keep my head from spinning.
Me and my over share for the day. I'll just drop it here into the void 😂
This and journaling. I just need to really get back to drawing and reading. Audible is good....but do miss being able to peel through a book.
Very helpful. Thankyou.
Excellent. Some fly so far under the radar, though, there can be plausible deniability in everything.
I wish you would have made this 5 years ago or so, and that I would have seen this then. My parents did claim my ex gf was very manipulative but I didnt see it/want to accept it, nor did I understand what "manipulative" in this regard even meant. This video points out a lot of the issues in that relationship, and I see now I should have listened to my gut feeling back then to get out sooner.
how was this posted a few seconds ago but ppl from a month ago have already commented?
That the way the Matrix works buddy!
Manipulator in my life is past tense. 13 years past the situation I extruded myself and my daughter from it’s nice to see your videos to reassure myself. My former manipulator has a out of prison now, but it hurts to know his children are once again in his clutches. I want to be mad, but I don’t think they can help it honestly.
Oh dear- i think I’m doing the manipulating without realizing it
First 38 secs of the video.... "Hey look my mother!"
Relatable they are literally talking about my mother
I once had a friend who had done basically everything on this list. They were 16 and I was 12 at the time. They used s*icide constantly against me and my friends to isolate us and guilt trip us into staying with them as friends. If something doesn’t seem right about someone, seek outside sources. Talk to other people. That’s legitimately the only way that I found out that what this friend was doing was bad
I was "part" of a relationship between a girl and boyfriend (Who hated me, I think because I broke his image of what a male friend is). And it hurt looking from the outside in seeing this girl get manipulated time after time, taking in his lies as truth. Making her cry because it was " her fault" that things didn't pan out. She's a bit more stable and willing to fight back now when things get out of hand but I am indeed still that protective Big "brother" who is allowed to offer my two cents, if and when asked.
I know someone who is like that, and it took me and my family a stupid amount of time to realize what a horrible person he is. By stupid amount of time, I mean at least three decades even before I was born.
That's exactly what I've been telling everyone and no one believed me!
the line "they face issues as you v me instead of us v the problem' really hit home.
This is a very well-presented topic. Thanks P2G. You’re very diplomatic and neutral when dealing with quite emotive subjects.
Not all manipulations are bad: benign manipulations can be useful. All children are manipulative to some degree, as are women, men less so.
“Honey, are you going to take me out tonight? I’ll wear that favourite dress for you😉” is a very agreeable one, and both parties can benefit from it, but it’s a manipulation nonetheless.
After my ex-wife and dealing with the inner havoc it caused I have gotten pretty good at identifying these people. They are gross to be around. It's like smelling shit but emotionally. Atleast with real shit you can hold your breath. With these people only thing that helps is keeping well away from them.
I didn't even know all of this. Now that I've been out of that toxic relationship for 4 months suddenly youtube recommends me this about exactly what she was like. Dang...
Thanks for your videos you help
at a young age i was manipulated and i didn't know until now. they were using me as a calculator and called me smart to pretend to care
This is exactly on point. I have a story but am too afraid to tell it
This is soo true. Been there, finally I'm healed. But I have hard time forgiving 🤧
Unfortunately, this is the mother of my child. I’ve learned the best way to deal with this personality (when you have to) is: don’t take them personally, yes them to death (but still live your own life), disengage completely when you see they are using their tactics, cut off communication until they act normal again. The cycle will forever repeat, but always let them subtly know, they have zero control over you without letting emotions take over, and never show you are affected. It’s your life, show them (don’t tell them).
But what if a psychiatrist was yet another emotional manipulator?
growing up with a brother who always overshared and told me all about how 'horrible' mom and dad were, it's still hard for me to wrap my head around how despite how horrible his intentions might or might not be, he most likely thinks he's in the right. And because I don't remember much of my early childhood, idk who to trust. My brothers, parents, cousins, grandparents? None will give me the same answer; sometimes I wish I could go into the past and see it all for myself.
Maybe they were scapegoated?
I could listen to you all Day >.
Jesus Christ i really am the problem
Great advice
This is helpful. Thank you again Psych2Go
When the pandemic ended, the face-to-face class returns. I have a classmate that compliments me as smart because we are classmates at online class last year and yes I performed well in the class.
After that complimenting, he then asks me "what is the answer of the question?" He did not only do that once but almost every class. I couldn't refuse because he might get disappointed at me. I realized that I'm not good at setting boundaries and I need to work on it.
Does the situation count as a master manipulator?
Maybe it does my friend
Sounds like bullying, too. Did you ever not know or got the answer wrong? Their behaviour in such cases can answer your question.
Yes he is manipulating you because he buttered you up just to get what he wanted.
She doesn't have to give answer theres no kind of bullying there, or 'master'
I would disagree. It would be if you set boundaries and they get all emotional and start making threats - passive or other. Then, it's how you react to those threats which will determine them being a 'master manipulator '.
Lots of parents and lovers like
this unfortunately.
Some of these anyone can do,
not just a "master manipulator".
Part 1: Too much too soon.
Perhaps they are just excited for a new person in their life?
And after getting to know them, they find they don't like them,
but don't want to be mean,
so they keep in contact,
but not as much as they used to.
Part 2: Pretending to be concerned.
You can't actually prove if they are or aren't.
Anyone can seem they they are not truly concerned.
My mother, brother, and a couple of my friends,
have all not seemed concerned about things at times.
Part 3: They refuse to resolve problems.
The same as part 2, with the same people.
Part 4: Gaslighting.
Same as 2 and 3...
With all the same people, but a few others also.
Are they all master manipulators?
Part 5: They isolate you.
Now this, is definitely something to be concerned with.
But it can also happen with,
paranoid attachment,
like you not wanting your wife to hangout with other men.
Part 6: They know your weakness and use them against you.
Calling someone stupid for doing something stupid,
is not master manipulator,
but it is mean.
I have called many people stupid,
and apologized.
Part 7: They guilt trip you.
This can be done accidently.
But it's a bit easier to tell when it is done ion a manipulating way.
Oh, this makes me so sad. I've been through a situation that reminds me of this, and so many other videos on this channel, but I still can't seem to make sense of it. I feel guilty and confused, though whenever I try to explain it to someone I simply break down because I know it doesn't make any sense. I feel broken and worthless... I don't know what can help me, I'm slowly giving up on everything because I can't see how any of it will ever get better. It doesn't help that I am very isolated, so I can't rely on friends, whatever that should mean because I never could. I can't shake the feeling that I'm a dangerous manipulator myself and that I'm doing everything wrong, because that seems to be the only explanation ? I don't know anymore. I'm just numb and I'm not sure what keeps me going at the moment. I wish nobody had to experience that kind of stuff. I don't know what I'm hoping to accomplish with this comment. It's plain stupid and I deserve to be ignored anyway.
I feel you and I’m very sorry. I have very similar emotions in my life now, but what I definitely learned from 40 years of my life with toxics and manipulators: if somebody says that you guilty - never believe. Guilt is a social construct, you are not guilty at all. And people, who try to make you feel guilty - not your friends or people who really love you. Don’t believe them. If it’s difficult, ask yourself, what you did? Is it really bad thing to blame you? And if that person feels guilty for making you hurt? That’s how I found, that my mother manipulated over 40 years by guilt: I recall, what a child I was, and find, that I never make problems at all, I was a dream, not a child) It’s hard to realise, that my mom never loved me throughly and made me feel guilt all my life just for nothing. But now nobody can manipulate me or tell me, I’m guilty. Please, be strong and remember: love never blames ❤️
Master manipulators are skilled at controlling others and getting what they want.
I love giving and always worry will I come off as a love bomber? But I don’t try to control others… and never pretend about what I feel. I do share a lot about my experience and feelings online, especially about my depression and anxiety. And I hate arguing.
This entire list describes a former friend turned coworker (thanks to me and my best friend) who made my life at work a living hell. He got me let-go, too. I hate him and always will.
One day you won’t hate him.
One day you won’t even think about him at all. 😉
I'm so unlucky to have a narcissist manipulator father and that ruined my life (although I'm doing my best to rebuild it), and it was common for me to hear phrases like
-I can't trust you because you tell lies
-if you're being sexual abused at school by a professor, i wouldn't believe you because you tell lies and i dont trust you
-I saw you doing this, but i don't understand why you're saying its not true (gasslighting)
-i would be the happiest if you'd get pregnant
-i watched a documentary but I dont think you'd like it, its about history
-as i read a lot of books and i always get informed...
And an important advice, never try to discuss something with that kind of people, they live in another reality, it coasted many years to realize that my dad always were a bad person wearing a mask of a cool dad, now im into self discovering and understand why abt my personality and discovering my real capacities, I'm still afraid of some things, but i have a family that supports me and helped me to find out how strong i can be, i wish lot of strength to people who are in the same situation
This entire video should've been titled "Dan's Narcissist Mom: A Case Study", because she fit every last one of these signs.
I'm pretty sure the channel didn't know about your mom, but dang I feel for you
Someone recently talked to me gave me a chance and I was all the red flags, I just had some trauma from a previous situation I was in and I ended up just people pleasing or love bombing, I was an absolute schmuck. I wasn't trying to cause any issues, but I absolutely did, mostly because I didn't want to deal with my own shit so I started putting my effort into them, I was more toxic than botulinum, so they intelligently let me know it wasn't going to work. I was sad and embarrassed at first but now I'm trying to use the experience to grow, and make sure I don't ever do anything like that again. I want to apologize because I know I was a schmuck regardless of my intent or my own issues, but I also feel like it's best if I just leave them be because I don't want to exacerbate what ever issues I've already caused.
I look back on it now & simply cannot believe how naive I was. Within 8 weeks - 8 FRE****G WEEKS !! - of starting the relationship, she shared what I thought was an incredibly vulnerable secret which made me starry-eyed, thinking she must really trust/love me. Basically bound me instantly, & then the non-stop manipulation started, & didn't stop for nearly 4 years. As soon as the scales dropped from my eyes & I stood up for my own values, the relationship was on life support, while she investigated other options, then dumped me without ceremony (while still telling me yet another lie) ......