My dad was like this when he got kicked out for abusing me. He would stalk us and sit outside our home. He made my mom’s life miserable when she finally divorced him a decade later. Now in my 40’s and therapy, meds and self reflection , still married two different versions of him. It’s like running from the serial killer and realizing you’ve been letting them in every time.
To this caller: PLEASE read the book "The gift of fear" by Gavin deBeker (& all his vds) and also The path forward surviving a narcissist by Lisa Scott. In addiction PLEASE GO TO YOUR LOCAL ABUSE CENTER to get help with safety plan. RESTRAINING Orders can make matters worse because you set off the abusers even more. (Gavin debeakers book talks about this) your husband's lying is = pathological lying (look up) Sorry this harrassment is happening. Know that you are NOT alone. Reach out for help ASAP! also heal your body from the stress you are under start with "Adrenal fatigue" vds on Dr Berg & Dr Mindy pelz. this is what you most likely are suffering from causing your anxiety issues. THIS IS a big deal so focus on your heal with a clean diet (keto works wonders Dr Berg, Dr Eckberg, dr boz, dr mindy pelz etc).
Restraining order doesn't really work if the abuser is determined. Sometimes gathering evidence and getting family and friends to support you is important.
You need to first live independent and feeling comfortable with your self and then you can look for a partner. Looking for a partner because “you need it” it almost always ends badly.
Very true. I found out how much I love being alone though hahah 🧝♀️ Well I always preferred my own company, but getting my own place really sealed the deal for me. I'm so happy 🍀 I just watch these when they show up on my feed and to remain in the know (what people are like lol) 🫡✨️
@@CaToRi- She is not independent... she is twice divorced, and entirely financially dependent on her husband and the father of her child, whom she just left.
@@stephengallagher2209 that’s why people needs to be independent Before starting a relationship and having kids. People needs to have a safety net Before jumping.
When I left my husband because he was abusive to me he didn’t leave me alone for years. Eventually got the police involved and he’s mostly left me alone now…still does the odd thing that lets me know he’s still there but doesn’t make contact anymore. THANK GOD!
The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker. Complex PTSD Surviving To Thriving by Pete Walker The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer Coercive Control - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞 Narcissistic Abuse Checklist 100 Tips For Survival And Healing - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞 Avoidant Attachers And Covert Control-Ken Reid podcast 🌞 Trauma PTSD CTPSD Dissociation And Trauma Bonding - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞 What To Do In Order To Recover Off The Back Of A Bad Breakup - Ken Reid podcast 🌞 Self Love To Self Healing - Sam Vaknin podcast ♥️ Take Back Your Life Own It! Sam Vaknin podcast ♥️
Rachel, you're a courageous woman. A survivor! ❤ I hope your ex is smart enough to stay out of your life permanently. You deserve to be safe. The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker
@@JonGarrett001 Yes we do. Women do not fake this. You can believe 95% of women who say they are verbally and or physically abused. Why do you choose to believe she may not be the victim? Does this have anything to do with how you feel about women, in general. Scared? Angry? Jealous?
@@JonGarrett001 They believe her because of a phony notion of sisterhood, or, more likely, they make her story relate to their own lives. Women are simple creatures. Here, if you listen, the caller said hubby was neither violent nor abusive. She said she left because 'he told a lie about me'. John did not ask what that was about, or dig deeper, because there lies female accountability, and the problem in the relationship. Instead, John told her she was in the right, and created an abusive drunk husband that the woman herself did not even allude to, all to sell books to these dopey broads.
@@JudithRandall-vz1zkFirstly, of course women lie. But not here, you just failed to listen, as the caller said her husband was neither violent nor abusive. Her issue was 'he told a lie about me', so she left. Two divorces, trying for a third, kid in tow... no chance she might be the problem? What was the 'lie'?
Get a restraining order. My ex was like this and I thank God we didn't have kids together. But a restraining order did deter him, because he didn't want to go to jail.
Yes! That’s what I had to do! Had Restricted Visitation with Grandparents having children and He could come stay with them for Visits. It was Safe and worked out 👍.
I broke mine 3 times through text and went to jail every single time 😂 Gosh was I young and hurt. I burned the bridge of my future too. That's what scarcity in love does for men, you put all in on a girl and when she leaves you, you have no empowerement to find another partner because it was so hard to meet one. Guys, primordial lesson: have choice before commiting, be confident with girls before laying your future with someone, you gotta learn to pull them as an acquired skill, you gotta learn game and feel somewhat empowered in the dating market, it will protect you and your partner in your future relationship.
@@YesNo-qb9vl it is an immaturity thing, sometimes, but in my case my ex had 10 restraining orders against him. I only found out later when another woman came to me, asking me to testify in court.
My first boyfriend I was 14. I lost my virginity at 15. I was ready. I was in love and so was he at that time. Although eventually and inevitably, it was the most intense heartbreak I’d ever experienced, it was necessary for me to experience it. It provided valuable lessons. I’m now 30, married and I look back with mature eyes and I don’t have regret.
As much as a rail against the court system and how it unfairly treats men in divorce, the flip side is how horribly courts do in protecting women from abusive men. First, guys move on leave your ex alone. Second, courts should be focused on keeping civilians save. I understand there are abuses but how many times do we have to hear of a woman being victimized by a stalker? I advocate for men, but some men should be locked up. Stop harassing women.
The courts do not treat men horribly during divorce. Some men just think that they can benefit from women's reproductive, domestic, emotional and childcare labour and then walk off with all marital assets when the union is over.
@@dlc2479 yeah, its become a red pill thing, thinking men are victims of woman and woman have it good after a divorce. I got nothing by leaving my husband. Woman are worse off after divorce than men statistically. Its also really apparent that red pills think a man being ruined financially by a pshyco woman is worse than a woman being killed by an abusive ex. It's a really weird movement.
Single parent to three kids here, this just blew my freeeeaaakin mind "your body would be failing you if it let you sleep knowing you alone are responsible for protection, provision, for safety, for gathering". Holy cheesus, game changer! The question is though, what do I do now...... Another pearler "Your vote is the only one that matters in their life"
A woman can take all the right steps to end an abusive marriage to protect herself and her kids and the idiotic courts put them all right back where they were, in danger and still dealing with the abuse, which is often made even worse, in far to many cases.
I called the police once when my ex got physically violent, and the prosecutor threatened me so badly that I swore I would never do that again. It was an awful experience. I thought I would never survive that period. it was like 24-7 anxiety and I had to go to work and pretend everything was normal.
@@Ryan-wx1bi prosecutors are only concerned about getting convictions. it is good for their career. The wanted to throw the book at my ex, and it was a first time, and I felt a warning would be more appropriate, they were threatening deportation, loss of job, loss of our home. and the prosecutor threatened me if I refused to testify, or withdrew the charges. In fact I could not withdraw the charges, they took over the charges so that I couldn't do that.
It's crazy how some people make life so much more difficult than it has to be. That first callers ex could have had an amazing life with her, but instead he pushed her away. And now he's going to wallow in misery about it.
The fact that you had to make a statement about how her story is true means they are anticipating negative comments and people who don’t think this could happen
I relate so much to the second caller😭 so hard getting good sleep when theres always so much to do and especially during those late night energy bursts
Me, too. But I think part of my issue is my biorhythm. I've always been a night owl -- I can adjust to a daytime work schedule but every weekend I go back to my natural rhythm. (Mondays are the toughest.)
Now that I'm retired I can "surrender" to my natural sleep rhythm, but it was hell for decade after decade dealing with the schedule of the (supposedly normal) world. I am truly most creative, energetic, motivated around ten at night. I usually stay up to about 2 AM and sleep in to somewhere around 9:30 AM. Loving it!
@@nickthompson1812 People don’t develop drinking problems bc of other people. They need to learn to take responsibility for their own actions and not blame other people for their issues that clearly already existed. How that person decides to deal with their issues is their problem not anybody else’s. Drinking in turn becomes the root of all other problems such as abuse in combination with already poor decision making skills.
@@nickthompson1812any number of reasons. He could have been abused as a kid. He could have had a friend or loved die a picked up drinking to cope. He could have developed a habit due to friends/coworkers drinking habits. He may have had a problem before the relationship but the call, the urge of addiction took over. Lots of other reasons. My father's was he was bored. Though he was physically abusive as well. But it was boredom.
As someone who works graveyard shifts I really feel where this guy is coming from when it comes to sleep, I used to sleep at least 9 hours a night and now I’m lucky to get 6
Damn this one hits close to home. I used to drink a lot and hurt the people closest to me. I deeply regret what happened but I’m 10 days sober and I’m so ducking grateful. 😢
@@cherylt777I get it but…. IMO not time for an online comment session for this guy lol. What in the world. @Alex good work on being sober 10 days man. That is the first goal and you are on the right path! I pray you will continue on the path of sobriety. Your only out of time when you die. Be the best you, you can be, everyday.
I have gone done a rabbit hole of drinking but been watching these videos every day and lowered it down to 3 glasses of wine a night to only one drink last night and I almost drank more and stopped myself. The struggle of dealing with stress and anxiety is real, I never thought I would feel stuck like this. I want to be clean and. It touch one drink. People make mistakes what is awesome is you are owning up to it and taking accountability of yours. You don’t have to tell us anything just apologize to those you hurt and keep trying.
So sorry Marie😢 been there. I had to make myself stronger,love myself,build up my self-esteem. I also had abusive men they love low self-esteem 😢😢 Love you sister ❣️
While watching Dr. Phil and Robin, they pointed out that intimidation and threats are a form of domestic violence.. I didn't know that, now I do. He made sure I didn't stand up to him but never laid a hand on me.
She needs to not blame herself. These abusive people chose her. They acted all sweet and romantic until they had her trapped. Then their real self came out. Alcohol could be the problem, but it could just allow him to let his true personality rise to the top. Stay safe.
This is called emophelia and it IS HER. She’s a magnet for these guys but she has to heal first. The guys are absolute trash for sure and she is attracting them.
She need to put the blame with him bc he is the abuser. She need a restraining order and need to call the police if he ever contact her. They got a trauma bond and she need to break it
@@wendypeeters7656 She absolutely needs to fight to keep him away from her BUT she needs professional help to not ALLOW this kind of behavior. She said the last guy was the same…this is a pattern. Her trend lines show she goes for this kind of guy. Why? She needs help, too.
@@tonytoni1150 You are missing it. The guys are straight up trash. SHE is allowing it, so that means SHE needs help. She either doesn’t or CANT see her worth. There is also a brain imbalance called Emophelia a lot of women have. They attract guys like this over and over again. It takes therapy to work with that condition and recognize when you’re falling into patterns. She is “wasting her time” because she won’t attract the right guy until she gets help. That is who she attracts
To the email, past few years I've been much more active and we have 3 kids. The closest gym is 15min away. My employer reimburses me for equipment so I've been making home gym purchases for the basement. I rarely workout mid day and if I do the youngest is napping. My workouts are normally at 9pm. Maybe a home gym will help. Then the kids also have the positive influence of seeing you workout. As sometimes my 6 year old is in the basement with me.
I agree with not allowing kids to date till 16 yr old, boys are even 2 yrs younger then their bio age. Our brains stop growing till 24 yrs old. Ignore the body, it's the brain that needs to mature. This is from a successful parent of a 27 and 29 yr old college graduate daughters, who both choose not to have kids before marriage.
I feel for the second caller. I’m not a morning person either. Don’t work out too late in the day, cut off caffeine at noon, set up a night time routine to wind down. When nothing else works, half an Ambien but never for consecutive days.
I began playing the cello at age 14, quite by accident. That instrument and involvement with music shaped my life from that moment on. Involvement with the arts totally enables young people in ways you would never expect. Dance, music, visual arts, fiber arts, and writing engage young people and provides them with the comradery they need as teens. Dating as we know it is too risky for a 14 year old, but getting together for band rehearsal is not.
Thank you Dr John for expressing such reasonable attitudes around teenagers dating! My parents always said 16 but then let it happen way earlier than that. I was taken advantage of and hurt in ways that were not helpful and that burdened me for years. If we think that our teenage girls are ‘exploring’ relationships…wrong. They are being explored by someone else. It’s that simple.
That 14 year old girl is heading straight for a pregnancy pretty soon because her homelife is a mess because of her mom and dad's choices. You better be honest with her NOW. Tell her it's not a joke and you arent just doing it to be a bad parent, it's the opposite.
My sister started dating at 14, a 16/17 year old. A guy my age, able to drive, love bombing her, taking her on dates. Since we all went to church together and my dad threatened me and my sister my parents thought we were safe from sex. My sister went through awful heartache and a pregnancy scare. It really messed her up for the rest of her relationships and the way she chose men.
Parents scaring, threatening, and lecturing do nothing but make kids hide away and sneak relationships. As for church, that only reinforces that same behavior.
Gabor Mate's book hold on to your kids opened my eyes to life growing up as a 30 something yr old. I have no kids and it allowed me to understand the purpose of raising children and as an adult myself, it allowed me to see where things broke with my parents. Definitely recommend it!!!
My ex did the same thing, over 100 calls and texts a day, sending flowers to my workplace, standing outside my home after moving 5 hours driving away... it lasted until his gaze was redirected to another woman whom he engaged with after knowing her for 5 weeks. Just insane and brainless
John doesn’t understand Do Not Contact/ROs. Yes, his dad was a detective, etc. Judges routinely review texts, words and DO NOT issue a Do Not Contact order. Or over, ‘lying’ according to former spouse. Go to court and see the women battered, still wearing hospital bracelet b/c they were just discharged. Judges expect GROWN ADULTS to block harassment, deal with the choices they made.
@@christinehoward6616 Incorrect. Allegations from a biased former spouse aren’t enough. Would be nice if we could all run to the Magistrates every time someone sent us a rude text with gasp! swear words. Women see red flags and HAVE KIDS with shoddy men. Then want a rescuer. Life doesn’t work that way. When a woman goes before the judge duty the RO paperwork completed and the Judge asks WHY the request was made, the woman needs to prove that the TRO is the ONLY option. The caller stated a lot of emotionalism, and ‘he lies about me’. If her lawyer can present evidence why the TRO is the ONLY option, with evidence that her life is in danger and credible threats of physical harm to her and kids, maybe a TRO would be granted. TROs aren’t a cosmic wall. They don’t stop the behavior unless enforced. Which means paying lawyer and back to the Magistrates when TRO violated.
There's a lot to consider. Controlling, abusive behaviors will escalate when a partner is trying to leave. Also, look at the trend line of abuse, has the behavior already been escalating prior? There's a percentage of abusers, where a ppo will effect some prevention. Ultimately, it's a rung on a ladder of protection. It's not a stop-all but it's always a paper trail. Her language in her question indicated to me that she was viewing his behavior as a thing to tolerate, not respond to with boundaries.
Leaving is not easy. Being out there afterward is not easy. BUT being there is not easy. Living without “whatever behaviour” is SO MUCH EASIER. It gets better with time 🙏 Bless you and your children ❤ you deserve peace in your home.
2:55 was uncalled for. It didn’t even sound like a joke. I’m hoping John was just wildly unaware of how that sounded, and he didn’t mean the tone so harshly.
Dude with sleeping problems read this. After dinner, take a magnesium supplement at least 200mg, maybe some melatonin 1-2.5mg, with a cup of camomile tea. You’ll be asleep by 9:30 easy
Dr. John, when Madison said her daughter had two men come in and out of her life, she didn’t mean dating. She meant he bio dad and now step dad leaving.
I would 100% withhold the kids then we can go to court and I’d show how I’m being treated. A judge could order supervised visitation over things like this IVE SEEN IT. I’d say I don’t feel safe and bring receipts and a dynamite attorney to prove he’s unfit
I’ve experienced a very abusive relationship in the past, and one thing I struggle to understand is how some women end up in a cycle of abusive relationships. Why leave one abuser only to end up in the hands of another? It’s hard to comprehend how this pattern continues. I’m trying to down them but please HEAL because if you don’t heal this pattern will continue!! How do you allow it to continue tho? That’s when the problem because YOU sorry to say but how can one see it otherwise!?!
Dear, dear Marie. Please know that, if you're picking partners wrong, nothing is wrong with you. You don't know what you don't know. At a certain point, I realized I needed to learn how to recognize potentially abusive partners. (Thankfully, i didnt marry or have kids.) There are better and worse TH-cam channels for self-education, sometimes dependent on the mental health of the professional, so I'm hoping they'll let me use my comment to recommend Dr. Ramani and Rebecca Zung (attorney). They specialize in narcissistic relationship issues and you'll learn a ton to help you keep from repeating the past. One of my therapists was impressed that I knew more about people with Cluster B Disorders then she did! (Not hard to believe since i binge-watched during most of my free time for at least a decade.) They target us because we're among the best kind of people.
To the guy who messed things up: Marriage Helper might be just the thing for you and your wife. Even if you don't get back together, you can both be harmonious as friends and coparents. She sounds like a wonderful person, and it seems like your daughter is taking after her. I know you want to be more yourself, the kind of man they both deserve. Today is the day to start. Many blessings to you.
The first one was pretty good and I found it helpful. The second one.... I don't know, it was really rambly IMO. I have yet to finish it or even get past the first few chapters, it was just so repetitive and wouldn't get to the point. Maybe I will in the future when I have a bit more patience.
I think John got confused about the 2 men in and out of the 3rd caller’s daughter’s life. She meant the dad and step dad not the girl’s boyfriends lol.
Dr. John is both awesome and was confused w the last caller-the two men the caller referred to in her teenaged daughter’s life are the two dad figures who’ve come in and out. Mom is scared her daughter will turn to boys to get needs met because of her daddy issues. 💔💔🙏
I will never understand why women have children with abusive men. It's one thing to expose yourself to it, but it's something else to expose children to it.
In the beginning of the relationship, these men are charming, protective and gentle. These men are chameleons but can't sustain the masquerade long term because this is not their authentic character. When the relationship becomes exclusive and with a ring.....things change very quickly. The Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde complex.
I think teenagers dating is inappropriate if not responsibly supervised. If you put this in perspective… if teens send nudes or inappropriate photos to each other… it’s still considered pedophila.
C'mon, we all know restraining orders don't work... The recipient of that order usually comes back with a vengeance and horrible things happen. Restraining orders are just "tp" with words on it...sadly..😔
John puts a lot of faith in “doing the right thing” in terms of law and courts which, in a perfect world, of course. But it’s just not like that. ROs mean nothing. Courts don’t care enough or understand the complexities of abuse or its effects to do what’s actually right. Children are not safe in divorce in the court system So advice like - go to court- call the police- etc, etc isn’t always good advice at all. Which sucks.
NO, restraining order don't grow fists & physically protect someone but they're still helpful. Restraining order extends police & courts ability to LEGALLY act beyond normal. Example: An ex stand on the sidewalk in front of your house just staring at your house. You're creeped out & call police, they come but can't arrest him/her for just standing on a public sidewalk while staring. While it's annoying & creepy, his/her behavior isn't illegal. HOWEVER, if you have a restraining order that stipulates he/she must be no closer than 1,000 feet in proximity to you, your house, or your job, NOW the police can LEGALLY arrest the ex because the has now done something illegal - they violated the written restraining order. So YES, restraining orders work to get the person arrested when otherwise they wouldn't be.
When someone rejects that when they start stalking and harassing. No does not mean no to them. They are predators mistaken for protector. Con artist 👨🎨. It’s best to try and learn the signs listen to your gut. A restraining order will add fuel to the fire. Its sad. 😔 That only helps to prove who it is. It doesn’t physically protect you. You must protect yourself.
With the 14 year old, do not parentify her for the youngest siblings. Direct the eldest daughter to focus on her female friendship groups, sports / hobbies and school.
I can tell you that it is highly unlikely that those calls are staged. People tell me things about their lives all the time. If you are a judgmental person than people will not tell you things. I happen to be very non-judgmental so people yell me astonishing things.
The worse does not equal abusive and devaluing behaviours. For worse is not tearing your spouse apart, threatening, hitting, beating, intimidating. For worse = losing a job and going through a time of financial hardship. For worse = a disease that is beyond a person's control such as cancer.
@@kungfujoe2136 What keeps people going is hope for the future.....situations will improve. That can only happen when both people in the relationship share the same vision, values and goals for their life together.
It’s sounds awful but she may get something out of it- repeating trauma or the attention gives her something. I don’t say this to mean she’s the problem. She isn’t. But you or I could clearly build a boundary because our past lets us. Hers doesn’t and she needs to work on that.
@papaguth933: She said that her husband "was drinking too much and was lying" the reason why she left him. Your answer was: "she is a bad wife". What kind of an answer is that? Your judgment is very, very off.
She considers it playful as well. It’s brother/sister banter! That’s their relationship. Kelly has said MULTIPLE times on this show. Her and John are close friends and she does the same thing back to him off air.
Also, I think they've mentioned John is the same or around the same age as Kelly. She has said on the show many times before that she's a willing participant on the dynamic.
You are recommending her to let her daughter date at 16 years old (still a child) when she openly told you she got pregnant at 17 years old (still a child) Is like she didn’t learn the lesson. DATING IS FOR ADULTS! Children should to be children and enjoy life without any of the complications and complexity of dating!!!! They aren’t emotionally, mentally or physically mature enough!!!!!
After spending the past year running on 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night during the work week with frequent stents of being awake for 30 to 40 hours straight working, I can't imagine sleeping in till 5:00 everyday. Good for the caller wanting to get sleep. Someday maybe I will. LOL
Pretty soon all the calls will be wives and girlfriends calling in about their partners. That’s almost exclusively what the calls have been, at least the vast majority of them. They call John for validation that the guy is the problem.
Doctor John you are real and have great advice. Thanks! Cheers to you! ✌🏼👏👏✌🏼 Never any excuse for any kind of abuse of any kind. Move on and up and forward. 😊 TeamDrJohn TeamDoctorJohnDelony TeamMarie TeamSedona TeamArizona TeamCanada TeamHappy TeamLiveLifeToTheFullest Cheers to being Happy 😃 🥂🍾🥂
Patterns are there and she seems to have some mental health issues that are causing her to choose any guy over being single. Relationship hoppers clearly don’t have individual confidence in themselves. She must not hop onto another relationship and have a child with the next guy she likes. She must grow up and take care of her children and spend less time trying to find the next baby daddy.
My dad was like this when he got kicked out for abusing me. He would stalk us and sit outside our home. He made my mom’s life miserable when she finally divorced him a decade later. Now in my 40’s and therapy, meds and self reflection , still married two different versions of him. It’s like running from the serial killer and realizing you’ve been letting them in every time.
@@tayriobravo6204 very well said...and very self aware statement....hope youre doing better...xxx ooo
So, you are saying your father sexually abused you, and it took your mother ten years to file for a divorce? Did she not send him to prison?
@tayriobravo6204 I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤
To this caller: PLEASE read the book "The gift of fear" by Gavin deBeker (& all his vds) and also The path forward surviving a narcissist by Lisa Scott.
In addiction PLEASE GO TO YOUR LOCAL ABUSE CENTER to get help with safety plan.
RESTRAINING Orders can make matters worse because you set off the abusers even more. (Gavin debeakers book talks about this)
your husband's lying is = pathological lying (look up)
Sorry this harrassment is happening. Know that you are NOT alone. Reach out for help ASAP!
also heal your body from the stress you are under start with "Adrenal fatigue" vds on Dr Berg & Dr Mindy pelz. this is what you most likely are suffering from causing your anxiety issues. THIS IS a big deal so focus on your heal with a clean diet (keto works wonders Dr Berg, Dr Eckberg, dr boz, dr mindy pelz etc).
The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker
Restraining order doesn't really work if the abuser is determined. Sometimes gathering evidence and getting family and friends to support you is important.
he threatened to leave, he threatened to stay, everything is a threat, unless he pays
most victim are from toxic origin families, no support system, easily being targeted by narc
@@zoomforceconsulting3889 RO doesn't work if he is your hubby, father of your kids, and has done nothing wrong.
And a gun! Predators don’t stop until you stop them. Too many women are dying because of the system.
@@kalimbaayinde25 women are predators for a mans money
I hope Dr. John has a therapist. I can only imagine how stressful and draining it must be after responding to days of emotionally charged calls.
You need to first live independent and feeling comfortable with your self and then you can look for a partner. Looking for a partner because “you need it” it almost always ends badly.
I said the exact same thing, she’s probably thinking of the next baby daddy she can meet right now.
Very true. I found out how much I love being alone though hahah 🧝♀️ Well I always preferred my own company, but getting my own place really sealed the deal for me. I'm so happy 🍀 I just watch these when they show up on my feed and to remain in the know (what people are like lol) 🫡✨️
@@CaToRi- She is not independent... she is twice divorced, and entirely financially dependent on her husband and the father of her child, whom she just left.
@@stephengallagher2209 that’s why people needs to be independent Before starting a relationship and having kids. People needs to have a safety net Before jumping.
💯
When I left my husband because he was abusive to me he didn’t leave me alone for years. Eventually got the police involved and he’s mostly left me alone now…still does the odd thing that lets me know he’s still there but doesn’t make contact anymore. THANK GOD!
What does he do that lets you know he’s still there but without contact? By the way sorry my English is bad
The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker.
Complex PTSD Surviving To Thriving by Pete Walker
The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
Coercive Control - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞
Narcissistic Abuse Checklist 100 Tips For Survival And Healing - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞
Avoidant Attachers And Covert Control-Ken Reid podcast 🌞
Trauma PTSD CTPSD Dissociation And Trauma Bonding - Sam Vaknin podcast 🌞
What To Do In Order To Recover Off The Back Of A Bad Breakup - Ken Reid podcast 🌞
Self Love To Self Healing - Sam Vaknin podcast ♥️
Take Back Your Life Own It! Sam Vaknin podcast ♥️
Rachel, you're a courageous woman. A survivor! ❤
I hope your ex is smart enough to stay out of your life permanently. You deserve to be safe.
The Gift Of Fear by Gavin De Becker
What great advice to this first caller. Straight-shooting but very kind. Giving her responsibility but not victim-blaming. Excellent.
How do any of you know she is the victim? You don't.
@@JonGarrett001 Yes we do. Women do not fake this. You can believe 95% of women who say they are verbally and or physically abused. Why do you choose to believe she may not be the victim? Does this have anything to do with how you feel about women, in general. Scared? Angry? Jealous?
@@JonGarrett001A man calls and says his wife is cheating on him. Do you believe him? How do you know he's a victim?
@@JonGarrett001 They believe her because of a phony notion of sisterhood, or, more likely, they make her story relate to their own lives. Women are simple creatures. Here, if you listen, the caller said hubby was neither violent nor abusive. She said she left because 'he told a lie about me'. John did not ask what that was about, or dig deeper, because there lies female accountability, and the problem in the relationship. Instead, John told her she was in the right, and created an abusive drunk husband that the woman herself did not even allude to, all to sell books to these dopey broads.
@@JudithRandall-vz1zkFirstly, of course women lie. But not here, you just failed to listen, as the caller said her husband was neither violent nor abusive. Her issue was 'he told a lie about me', so she left. Two divorces, trying for a third, kid in tow... no chance she might be the problem? What was the 'lie'?
The woman on the last call sounds so strong and I can’t imagine being in her situation. At only 33 years old, she’s a legend.
Dr. John that's not being old fashioned. That's being a good parent who wants the best for your daughter or son. I applaud you for that.
He is not a real doctor.
@@stephengallagher2209he has 2 PHD’s. He’s a doctor. He’s not an MD, though, which I think is what you’re trying to say.
@@stephengallagher2209you don't understand the definition of doctor and the wide range of 'doctor' 🤣
Get a restraining order. My ex was like this and I thank God we didn't have kids together. But a restraining order did deter him, because he didn't want to go to jail.
Yes! That’s what I had to do! Had Restricted Visitation with Grandparents having children and He could come stay with them for Visits. It was Safe and worked out 👍.
I broke mine 3 times through text and went to jail every single time 😂 Gosh was I young and hurt. I burned the bridge of my future too. That's what scarcity in love does for men, you put all in on a girl and when she leaves you, you have no empowerement to find another partner because it was so hard to meet one. Guys, primordial lesson: have choice before commiting, be confident with girls before laying your future with someone, you gotta learn to pull them as an acquired skill, you gotta learn game and feel somewhat empowered in the dating market, it will protect you and your partner in your future relationship.
Erm, she has a kid with him, so...
durr.
@@YesNo-qb9vl it is an immaturity thing, sometimes, but in my case my ex had 10 restraining orders against him. I only found out later when another woman came to me, asking me to testify in court.
@@stephengallagher2209 she can still get a restraining order with visitation requirements.
My first boyfriend I was 14. I lost my virginity at 15. I was ready. I was in love and so was he at that time.
Although eventually and inevitably, it was the most intense heartbreak I’d ever experienced, it was necessary for me to experience it. It provided valuable lessons. I’m now 30, married and I look back with mature eyes and I don’t have regret.
As much as a rail against the court system and how it unfairly treats men in divorce, the flip side is how horribly courts do in protecting women from abusive men. First, guys move on leave your ex alone. Second, courts should be focused on keeping civilians save. I understand there are abuses but how many times do we have to hear of a woman being victimized by a stalker? I advocate for men, but some men should be locked up. Stop harassing women.
The courts do not treat men horribly during divorce. Some men just think that they can benefit from women's reproductive, domestic, emotional and childcare labour and then walk off with all marital assets when the union is over.
@@dlc2479 yeah, its become a red pill thing, thinking men are victims of woman and woman have it good after a divorce. I got nothing by leaving my husband. Woman are worse off after divorce than men statistically. Its also really apparent that red pills think a man being ruined financially by a pshyco woman is worse than a woman being killed by an abusive ex. It's a really weird movement.
@dlc2479 this is exactly what it is
@@youtubeKathy It’s a gay movement. There’s nothing heterosexual about hating women.
@@youtubeKathy It’s a gay movement. There’s nothing heterosexual about hating women.
👏👏 14 is too young. Love this… protecting our kids at all cost.
Yes, 100% agree.
Indeed
Protecting The Gift by Gavin De Becker
Single parent to three kids here, this just blew my freeeeaaakin mind "your body would be failing you if it let you sleep knowing you alone are responsible for protection, provision, for safety, for gathering". Holy cheesus, game changer! The question is though, what do I do now......
Another pearler "Your vote is the only one that matters in their life"
A woman can take all the right steps to end an abusive marriage to protect herself and her kids and the idiotic courts put them all right back where they were, in danger and still dealing with the abuse, which is often made even worse, in far to many cases.
I called the police once when my ex got physically violent, and the prosecutor threatened me so badly that I swore I would never do that again. It was an awful experience. I thought I would never survive that period. it was like 24-7 anxiety and I had to go to work and pretend everything was normal.
And then the courts prosecute guys who were falsely accused. The system is so broken
@@Ryan-wx1bi prosecutors are only concerned about getting convictions. it is good for their career. The wanted to throw the book at my ex, and it was a first time, and I felt a warning would be more appropriate, they were threatening deportation, loss of job, loss of our home. and the prosecutor threatened me if I refused to testify, or withdrew the charges. In fact I could not withdraw the charges, they took over the charges so that I couldn't do that.
It's crazy how some people make life so much more difficult than it has to be. That first callers ex could have had an amazing life with her, but instead he pushed her away. And now he's going to wallow in misery about it.
The fact that you had to make a statement about how her story is true means they are anticipating negative comments and people who don’t think this could happen
I relate so much to the second caller😭 so hard getting good sleep when theres always so much to do and especially during those late night energy bursts
Me, too. But I think part of my issue is my biorhythm. I've always been a night owl -- I can adjust to a daytime work schedule but every weekend I go back to my natural rhythm. (Mondays are the toughest.)
@@BeingLifted i feeel that 100%🫠…
Now that I'm retired I can "surrender" to my natural sleep rhythm, but it was hell for decade after decade dealing with the schedule of the (supposedly normal) world. I am truly most creative, energetic, motivated around ten at night. I usually stay up to about 2 AM and sleep in to somewhere around 9:30 AM. Loving it!
It sounds like she's still protecting him in the beginning, it definitely sounds like he's done more than she's saying.
I wonder why he developed a drinking problem and started lying if the relationship was built on love and trust.
@@nickthompson1812 People don’t develop drinking problems bc of other people. They need to learn to take responsibility for their own actions and not blame other people for their issues that clearly already existed. How that person decides to deal with their issues is their problem not anybody else’s. Drinking in turn becomes the root of all other problems such as abuse in combination with already poor decision making skills.
@@nickthompson1812any number of reasons. He could have been abused as a kid.
He could have had a friend or loved die a picked up drinking to cope.
He could have developed a habit due to friends/coworkers drinking habits.
He may have had a problem before the relationship but the call, the urge of addiction took over.
Lots of other reasons.
My father's was he was bored. Though he was physically abusive as well. But it was boredom.
As someone who works graveyard shifts I really feel where this guy is coming from when it comes to sleep, I used to sleep at least 9 hours a night and now I’m lucky to get 6
As a girl who lost her virginity at 15 to my 17 y/o boyfriend - make them wait to date. I wasn’t ready.
Damn this one hits close to home. I used to drink a lot and hurt the people closest to me. I deeply regret what happened but I’m 10 days sober and I’m so ducking grateful. 😢
“Deeply regret what happened” or deeply regret what you did?
@@cherylt777I get it but…. IMO not time for an online comment session for this guy lol. What in the world.
@Alex good work on being sober 10 days man. That is the first goal and you are on the right path! I pray you will continue on the path of sobriety. Your only out of time when you die. Be the best you, you can be, everyday.
Goood for you! You can do this
I have gone done a rabbit hole of drinking but been watching these videos every day and lowered it down to 3 glasses of wine a night to only one drink last night and I almost drank more and stopped myself. The struggle of dealing with stress and anxiety is real, I never thought I would feel stuck like this. I want to be clean and. It touch one drink. People make mistakes what is awesome is you are owning up to it and taking accountability of yours. You don’t have to tell us anything just apologize to those you hurt and keep trying.
@@lukkke9 thanks you for those words. Highly appreciated, just taking it day by day.
So sorry Marie😢 been there.
I had to make myself stronger,love myself,build up my self-esteem.
I also had abusive men they love low self-esteem 😢😢 Love you sister ❣️
I can relate to the last caller. I have 1 year old and 14 yr old and I'm alone, it's hard. Sometimes I don't trust myself anymore.
❤
💜
U got this mama
While watching Dr. Phil and Robin, they pointed out that intimidation and threats are a form of domestic violence.. I didn't know that, now I do. He made sure I didn't stand up to him but never laid a hand on me.
It's psychological abuse..my ex was really good at it...along with the physical. Once they put that fear in your heart they have you.
She needs to not blame herself. These abusive people chose her. They acted all sweet and romantic until they had her trapped. Then their real self came out. Alcohol could be the problem, but it could just allow him to let his true personality rise to the top. Stay safe.
This is called emophelia and it IS HER. She’s a magnet for these guys but she has to heal first. The guys are absolute trash for sure and she is attracting them.
She need to put the blame with him bc he is the abuser. She need a restraining order and need to call the police if he ever contact her. They got a trauma bond and she need to break it
@@wendypeeters7656 She absolutely needs to fight to keep him away from her BUT she needs professional help to not ALLOW this kind of behavior. She said the last guy was the same…this is a pattern. Her trend lines show she goes for this kind of guy. Why? She needs help, too.
@@WOOFBTBWP123 exactly, it’s her. The guys are what they are, why is she wasting her time with them?
@@tonytoni1150 You are missing it. The guys are straight up trash. SHE is allowing it, so that means SHE needs help. She either doesn’t or CANT see her worth. There is also a brain imbalance called Emophelia a lot of women have. They attract guys like this over and over again. It takes therapy to work with that condition and recognize when you’re falling into patterns. She is “wasting her time” because she won’t attract the right guy until she gets help. That is who she attracts
To the email, past few years I've been much more active and we have 3 kids. The closest gym is 15min away. My employer reimburses me for equipment so I've been making home gym purchases for the basement. I rarely workout mid day and if I do the youngest is napping. My workouts are normally at 9pm. Maybe a home gym will help. Then the kids also have the positive influence of seeing you workout. As sometimes my 6 year old is in the basement with me.
Dr John ~~you sir gave the BEST ADVICE ever regarding the mother with the 14yo daughter.
I agree with not allowing kids to date till 16 yr old, boys are even 2 yrs younger then their bio age. Our brains stop growing till 24 yrs old. Ignore the body, it's the brain that needs to mature. This is from a successful parent of a 27 and 29 yr old college graduate daughters, who both choose not to have kids before marriage.
👍
Protecting The Gift by Gavin De Becker
I feel for the second caller. I’m not a morning person either. Don’t work out too late in the day, cut off caffeine at noon, set up a night time routine to wind down. When nothing else works, half an Ambien but never for consecutive days.
The 14-year-old needs to be involved in sports or drama or some of the arts. She needs something else to do after school and on the weekends
I began playing the cello at age 14, quite by accident. That instrument and involvement with music shaped my life from that moment on. Involvement with the arts totally enables young people in ways you would never expect. Dance, music, visual arts, fiber arts, and writing engage young people and provides them with the comradery they need as teens. Dating as we know it is too risky for a 14 year old, but getting together for band rehearsal is not.
Thank you Dr John for expressing such reasonable attitudes around teenagers dating! My parents always said 16 but then let it happen way earlier than that. I was taken advantage of and hurt in ways that were not helpful and that burdened me for years. If we think that our teenage girls are ‘exploring’ relationships…wrong. They are being explored by someone else. It’s that simple.
That 14 year old girl is heading straight for a pregnancy pretty soon because her homelife is a mess because of her mom and dad's choices. You better be honest with her NOW. Tell her it's not a joke and you arent just doing it to be a bad parent, it's the opposite.
Totally awesome conversations. I'm so happy you're on John. You're helping so many people.😊
My sister started dating at 14, a 16/17 year old. A guy my age, able to drive, love bombing her, taking her on dates. Since we all went to church together and my dad threatened me and my sister my parents thought we were safe from sex. My sister went through awful heartache and a pregnancy scare. It really messed her up for the rest of her relationships and the way she chose men.
Parents scaring, threatening, and lecturing do nothing but make kids hide away and sneak relationships. As for church, that only reinforces that same behavior.
Gabor Mate's book hold on to your kids opened my eyes to life growing up as a 30 something yr old. I have no kids and it allowed me to understand the purpose of raising children and as an adult myself, it allowed me to see where things broke with my parents. Definitely recommend it!!!
Thank you for this 🙏🏿❤️
Night owl guy ! Exactly my problem, glad I tuned in . Lots of helpful info … I’m on it.
John- For the last call, the lady was saying 2 men left her daughter’s life referring to the bio dad and step dad , not romantic interests lol
He’s well aware. That’s why he said men acting like BOYS. Those aren’t real men. Men that abuse, or leave a woman 5 months postpartum aren’t real men.
My ex did the same thing, over 100 calls and texts a day, sending flowers to my workplace, standing outside my home after moving 5 hours driving away... it lasted until his gaze was redirected to another woman whom he engaged with after knowing her for 5 weeks. Just insane and brainless
John doesn’t understand Do Not Contact/ROs. Yes, his dad was a detective, etc. Judges routinely review texts, words and DO NOT issue a Do Not Contact order. Or over, ‘lying’ according to former spouse. Go to court and see the women battered, still wearing hospital bracelet b/c they were just discharged. Judges expect GROWN ADULTS to block harassment, deal with the choices they made.
He does, he is also looking at a Drunk putting the kids at risk on his parenting time. That is the difference
@@christinehoward6616 Incorrect. Allegations from a biased former spouse aren’t enough. Would be nice if we could all run to the Magistrates every time someone sent us a rude text with gasp! swear words. Women see red flags and HAVE KIDS with shoddy men. Then want a rescuer. Life doesn’t work that way. When a woman goes before the judge duty the RO paperwork completed and the Judge asks WHY the request was made, the woman needs to prove that the TRO is the ONLY option. The caller stated a lot of emotionalism, and ‘he lies about me’. If her lawyer can present evidence why the TRO is the ONLY option, with evidence that her life is in danger and credible threats of physical harm to her and kids, maybe a TRO would be granted. TROs aren’t a cosmic wall. They don’t stop the behavior unless enforced. Which means paying lawyer and back to the Magistrates when TRO violated.
There's a lot to consider. Controlling, abusive behaviors will escalate when a partner is trying to leave. Also, look at the trend line of abuse, has the behavior already been escalating prior? There's a percentage of abusers, where a ppo will effect some prevention. Ultimately, it's a rung on a ladder of protection. It's not a stop-all but it's always a paper trail. Her language in her question indicated to me that she was viewing his behavior as a thing to tolerate, not respond to with boundaries.
@lovingfailure her language also indicates that she doesn't believe in herself that she is worthy of safety and kindness.
The sleep info was awesome, makes complete sense
Leaving is not easy. Being out there afterward is not easy. BUT being there is not easy. Living without “whatever behaviour” is SO MUCH EASIER. It gets better with time 🙏
Bless you and your children ❤ you deserve peace in your home.
The third caller is why I thank goodness I never had more than one child and never remarried after my divorce. Shew!
These women need to heal. Be with u ..❤ yourself
2:55 was uncalled for. It didn’t even sound like a joke. I’m hoping John was just wildly unaware of how that sounded, and he didn’t mean the tone so harshly.
Nice to have a nice easy episode
Dude with sleeping problems read this. After dinner, take a magnesium supplement at least 200mg, maybe some melatonin 1-2.5mg, with a cup of camomile tea. You’ll be asleep by 9:30 easy
I think Marie is one of the most used pseudonyms on the show. Everytime I hear the name, I go 🎶 Dear Marie 🎶 😂
So does John 😂
Ikr!!!!😂
"The truth is often stranger than fiction"
-some guy somewhere said once..
Great advice here!
At 14 , I still thought boys were mostly gross and was in my own little world, reading a lot, & still playing kids games, etc.
Dr. John, when Madison said her daughter had two men come in and out of her life, she didn’t mean dating. She meant he bio dad and now step dad leaving.
He’s well aware. That’s why he said men acting like BOYS. Those aren’t real men. Men that abuse, or leave a woman 5 months pregnant aren’t real men.
I would 100% withhold the kids then we can go to court and I’d show how I’m being treated. A judge could order supervised visitation over things like this IVE SEEN IT. I’d say I don’t feel safe and bring receipts and a dynamite attorney to prove he’s unfit
We’re all in this boat together folks.
I’ve experienced a very abusive relationship in the past, and one thing I struggle to understand is how some women end up in a cycle of abusive relationships. Why leave one abuser only to end up in the hands of another? It’s hard to comprehend how this pattern continues. I’m trying to down them but please HEAL because if you don’t heal this pattern will continue!! How do you allow it to continue tho? That’s when the problem because YOU sorry to say but how can one see it otherwise!?!
Always a great show❤
Third caller - John is SPOT ON about 14 being too young to date.
Wow this was really good!
Dear, dear Marie. Please know that, if you're picking partners wrong, nothing is wrong with you. You don't know what you don't know. At a certain point, I realized I needed to learn how to recognize potentially abusive partners. (Thankfully, i didnt marry or have kids.) There are better and worse TH-cam channels for self-education, sometimes dependent on the mental health of the professional, so I'm hoping they'll let me use my comment to recommend Dr. Ramani and Rebecca Zung (attorney). They specialize in narcissistic relationship issues and you'll learn a ton to help you keep from repeating the past. One of my therapists was impressed that I knew more about people with Cluster B Disorders then she did! (Not hard to believe since i binge-watched during most of my free time for at least a decade.) They target us because we're among the best kind of people.
To the guy who messed things up: Marriage Helper might be just the thing for you and your wife. Even if you don't get back together, you can both be harmonious as friends and coparents. She sounds like a wonderful person, and it seems like your daughter is taking after her. I know you want to be more yourself, the kind of man they both deserve. Today is the day to start. Many blessings to you.
Has anyone read any of his books and would you recommend them? Thanks :)
Yes
Delony’s books are the BEST!!!!
I thought the books were easy to read and overall pretty helpful. However I didn’t prefer the audiobook for his voice came off as patronizing.
I've read Own Your Past. It's a good read and very accessible. Haven't read Non Anxious yet, but it's in my queue
The first one was pretty good and I found it helpful. The second one.... I don't know, it was really rambly IMO. I have yet to finish it or even get past the first few chapters, it was just so repetitive and wouldn't get to the point. Maybe I will in the future when I have a bit more patience.
Abuse is never one sided. Start talking about that
I think John got confused about the 2 men in and out of the 3rd caller’s daughter’s life. She meant the dad and step dad not the girl’s boyfriends lol.
Dr. John is both awesome and was confused w the last caller-the two men the caller referred to in her teenaged daughter’s life are the two dad figures who’ve come in and out. Mom is scared her daughter will turn to boys to get needs met because of her daddy issues. 💔💔🙏
Loving the FTHC t- shirt!!
Mint tea helps me sleep.
I can't stand stalkers!
Restraining order and document EVERYTHING. ALSO START PACKING.
I will never understand why women have children with abusive men. It's one thing to expose yourself to it, but it's something else to expose children to it.
In the beginning of the relationship, these men are charming, protective and gentle. These men are chameleons but can't sustain the masquerade long term because this is not their authentic character.
When the relationship becomes exclusive and with a ring.....things change very quickly.
The Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde complex.
Thank you for your hard work and dedication. Your videos are always a joy to watch.👾🦓😄
I think teenagers dating is inappropriate if not responsibly supervised. If you put this in perspective… if teens send nudes or inappropriate photos to each other… it’s still considered pedophila.
C'mon, we all know restraining orders don't work...
The recipient of that order usually comes back with a vengeance and horrible things happen.
Restraining orders are just "tp" with words on it...sadly..😔
Exactly. They're worthless.
John puts a lot of faith in “doing the right thing” in terms of law and courts which, in a perfect world, of course. But it’s just not like that. ROs mean nothing. Courts don’t care enough or understand the complexities of abuse or its effects to do what’s actually right. Children are not safe in divorce in the court system So advice like - go to court- call the police- etc, etc isn’t always good advice at all. Which sucks.
NO, restraining order don't grow fists & physically protect someone but they're still helpful. Restraining order extends police & courts ability to LEGALLY act beyond normal. Example: An ex stand on the sidewalk in front of your house just staring at your house. You're creeped out & call police, they come but can't arrest him/her for just standing on a public sidewalk while staring. While it's annoying & creepy, his/her behavior isn't illegal. HOWEVER, if you have a restraining order that stipulates he/she must be no closer than 1,000 feet in proximity to you, your house, or your job, NOW the police can LEGALLY arrest the ex because the has now done something illegal - they violated the written restraining order. So YES, restraining orders work to get the person arrested when otherwise they wouldn't be.
When someone rejects that when they start stalking and harassing. No does not mean no to them. They are predators mistaken for protector. Con artist 👨🎨. It’s best to try and learn the signs listen to your gut. A restraining order will add fuel to the fire. Its sad. 😔 That only helps to prove who it is. It doesn’t physically protect you. You must protect yourself.
With the 14 year old, do not parentify her for the youngest siblings. Direct the eldest daughter to focus on her female friendship groups, sports / hobbies and school.
I can tell you that it is highly unlikely that those calls are staged. People tell me things about their lives all the time. If you are a judgmental person than people will not tell you things. I happen to be very non-judgmental so people yell me astonishing things.
So true she needs some women to help her.
He’s not going to the gym he’s cheating on you.
This made me cry
Everyone should be taking a complex magnesium supplement. Everyone.
14:36 he needs to wear a night mask - jmo ✌️
I am tired of all the ads. Are these show on another medium?
He can take care of a 5 month old! Why not ?
How would he breastfeed a 5-month old exactly?
for better or for worse
untill death du us part
right a bell?
it's not untill i dont feel like it annymore
The worse does not equal abusive and devaluing behaviours.
For worse is not tearing your spouse apart, threatening, hitting, beating, intimidating.
For worse = losing a job and going through a time of financial hardship.
For worse = a disease that is beyond a person's control such as cancer.
@@mariastathopoulos744 just know that those words sont mean annything
all that keeps ppl going is cognitive dissonance
@@mariastathopoulos744 also you only hear one side of the story
@@kungfujoe2136 Yes, one perspective is shared and you made a judgement call.
@@kungfujoe2136 What keeps people going is hope for the future.....situations will improve. That can only happen when both people in the relationship share the same vision, values and goals for their life together.
Wish I got too here exactly how that guy is stalking her
This is awful. I'd be doing anything to get away from a person who wouldn't leave me alone. Blocking, restraining orders, etc.
It’s sounds awful but she may get something out of it- repeating trauma or the attention gives her something. I don’t say this to mean she’s the problem. She isn’t. But you or I could clearly build a boundary because our past lets us. Hers doesn’t and she needs to work on that.
@papaguth933: She said that her husband "was drinking too much and was lying" the reason why she left him. Your answer was: "she is a bad wife". What kind of an answer is that? Your judgment is very, very off.
Courts have mediators. Also,the yelling is the barking before the bite.
You are mean to Kelly. You may think it’s just teasing and playful but I’m sure she doesn’t.
I don’t.
She considers it playful as well. It’s brother/sister banter! That’s their relationship. Kelly has said MULTIPLE times on this show. Her and John are close friends and she does the same thing back to him off air.
Also, I think they've mentioned John is the same or around the same age as Kelly. She has said on the show many times before that she's a willing participant on the dynamic.
Stop listening then
@@erikak128 LOL no John is YOUNGER than Kelly. That’s why he puts her through so much hell. 🤣
@@flashthecorgi2053 if he's younger it's only by a few months at most, they're both pushing 50.
At what point is the first woman a problem.
36:46 "two men" - she was trying to say their fathers, not sexual partners.
Thank you
You are recommending her to let her daughter date at 16 years old (still a child) when she openly told you she got pregnant at 17 years old (still a child)
Is like she didn’t learn the lesson.
DATING IS FOR ADULTS! Children should to be children and enjoy life without any of the complications and complexity of dating!!!! They aren’t emotionally, mentally or physically mature enough!!!!!
I wonder if the husband was the caller from Sedona from a few days ago?
After spending the past year running on 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night during the work week with frequent stents of being awake for 30 to 40 hours straight working, I can't imagine sleeping in till 5:00 everyday. Good for the caller wanting to get sleep. Someday maybe I will. LOL
Pretty soon all the calls will be wives and girlfriends calling in about their partners. That’s almost exclusively what the calls have been, at least the vast majority of them. They call John for validation that the guy is the problem.
Doctor John you are real and have great advice. Thanks!
Cheers to you!
✌🏼👏👏✌🏼
Never any excuse for any kind of abuse of any kind. Move on and up and forward. 😊
TeamDrJohn
TeamDoctorJohnDelony
TeamMarie
TeamSedona
TeamArizona
TeamCanada
TeamHappy
TeamLiveLifeToTheFullest
Cheers to being Happy 😃
🥂🍾🥂
Patterns are there and she seems to have some mental health issues that are causing her to choose any guy over being single.
Relationship hoppers clearly don’t have individual confidence in themselves.
She must not hop onto another relationship and have a child with the next guy she likes.
She must grow up and take care of her children and spend less time trying to find the next baby daddy.
Are you safe? You are stunning and brave. Can i just tell something? Thank you. Just Thank you.
Single moms are heroes.
Magnesium has helped me along with valerian root for sleep
Hey be careful with valerian root. It can interact with a lot of meds.
@@LemonJellyJ thank you. I didn’t know that . I am not on any medication thank god yet ..
@@kathigratton2286 then you’re prob fine! just something to keep in mind to always tell doctors you’re taking just in case.
You don't fall pregnant. Do definitely see it coming!
That depends. I was on the pill when l got pregnant. Never missed a day taking the contraception.
Man stalking woman is bad (it is)
When a woman stalks a man, it's laughed at (which it shouldn't be)