How to STOP Jealousy & Comparison | A Monk's Approach

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 พ.ค. 2024
  • TOP 5 TIPS to avoid jealousy & comparison | A Monk's Approach
    With the amount of social media and the messages we receive on a daily basis, it is easy to fall into the pattern of comparing ourselves to others. If one is not mindful, this issue can negatively affect one's overall mental health. In this video, I wanted to share 5 tips that may help you decrease jealousy and comparison. I hope this helps :) #mentalhealth #monk #monks
    0:00 Intro
    2:40 See the good in others & integrate it
    7:07 Anumotanaboon or "rejoice in your merits"
    10:05 Spread loving kindness
    14:20 Talk to them and ask them how
    18:32 Everyone experiences suffering
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ความคิดเห็น • 2.2K

  • @nickkeomahavong01
    @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +545

    Question of the Day: Do you struggle with jealousy and comparison? If so, what are you doing to overcome it?

    • @traycex
      @traycex 3 ปีที่แล้ว +117

      I’m trying to replace comparison with admiration 😌

    • @MoonLight-bu9hz
      @MoonLight-bu9hz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      I was use to feel jealous and compared my life with others but not anymore once I realized it I felt very bad about myself. This bothers me more then anything else.... when I think what kind of person i was.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@traycex wonderful

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@MoonLight-bu9hz yea it's not a good feeling.

    • @alanahorner8012
      @alanahorner8012 3 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      l do my best not to compare myself with others as l believe we all have our heavy cross to carry however with social media it's hard not to do so. When you see people enjoying life with friends and family (l am not in good terms with my family) it does trigger something. But one thing that l do is that l say to myself what can l do to get what they have? Also something to keep in mind is that social media is a facade, people modify their bodies, lifestyle etc just to look good online but we don't know what they go through on the inside.

  • @nicolafrost3942
    @nicolafrost3942 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2983

    My late mentor always said: " Don't compare your inside with somebody else's outside".

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      That's beautiful. I love it :-)

    • @roxana_88
      @roxana_88 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That’s good! I’m going to keep that quote😊

    • @neranderthal
      @neranderthal 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Yes this is so good thank you... I was very jealous of a girl who a guy left me for, I’ve never met her and only seen her profile and pictures online. It was a very dangerous thing to compare myself to, as it was only her perfected surface I was seeing, when she could be going through her own troubles that I am unaware of.

    • @the1andonlypalyar
      @the1andonlypalyar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      So meaningful ❤️

    • @janewright2800
      @janewright2800 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Love that truth!🙏💚🌈we are all beautifully unique🥰

  • @TakeBackYourMind997
    @TakeBackYourMind997 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2050

    Top 4 things that helped me stop comparison:
    - You can never TRULY know someone. So you're not actually comparing yourself to them, you're comparing the whole of yourself to your incomplete outside perception of them.
    - Even if comparison were fair and rational, it still doesn't serve us. It's a useless train of thought, thinking that way gets you nowhere.
    - You most likely don't want the other person's life, you just want a few qualities from their life. Maybe that's money, confidence or something else. But whatever it is, it's the quality you want, not the other person's life. So take the person out of the equation and just decide if want certain factors from their life in your life, if you do then make it happen. If you can't, learn to accept that.
    - Everytime you get a comparison thought, mindfully observe it, tell yourself 3 positive things about yourself, then let the thought go through distraction. You'll rewire your thinking.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +176

      Wow that is very beautiful. Great tips. If you would like, you're welcome to join our online Reddit community. These kind of posts would be so helpful to others. So much value my friend :-) thank you

    • @djdazm
      @djdazm 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      This is great. Thank you

    • @tenderness3237
      @tenderness3237 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Great and helpful❤

    • @liber1993k
      @liber1993k 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@nickkeomahavong01 @Nick Keomahavong yeah, words of wisdom. There is a way to trully know someone, but at that point your life is already at stage where you are above all that, comparison, jealousy, all of it. You start looking at them as different players, but deep down they are same force, divine energy, call it god or whatever.
      I trained my mind to ignore judgment, to accept people who they are, to accept world for what it is, but on the other hand we are creators of world, we choose what world we want to live in. We choose if we want to stay in negativity, judgement, doubt, selfpity,... Stronger than we think, material is merely energy condensed and our thoughts sometimes arent even ours to begin with. When you shut out all external noise and find yourself in that dark room, at that point you are in front of a challenge. Real you is hiding underneath all that loud noise, waiting to be released. . Question is, are you willing to see something you wont like? Different you, someone you dont know yet.
      Here's the thing, our ego is a quitter untill you change your mind. When you do that, this body will follow, your character will change habits or create new ones.
      Why i say this, because its easier to be something you are not, another person,.. when this mask starts to crumble, mind gets in trigger mode, either deal with it or go in that direction deeper and deeper.
      Why we compare, why we want to be partially someone else? This question was asked many times, here's my response.
      Because what another person creates can be in a way measured, ex, he's happy, look at his beautiful wife and home, that must surely be one of many reasons.
      Who you are under all that bs we projected onto ourselves is immeasurable, its something you cant define, our mind cannot comprehend yet.
      Exists as possibility to be created from a quantum field of energy called source.
      Thats why mind goes into trigger mode and stays in comfort zone, compares, judges,...
      Its a repetitive program and its on us how we program it.
      Working atm so i had to put it all together like this, anyways, mind is very interesting, especially when you go really deep. 🙏🥰🤪😃

    • @karensmith1521
      @karensmith1521 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      TYSM

  • @canadianRadio
    @canadianRadio 3 ปีที่แล้ว +515

    I disabled my social media. Seems to help my brain immensely.

    • @Saif-zf9vb
      @Saif-zf9vb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I’ve found the same.

    • @AvadaKedavraSpell69
      @AvadaKedavraSpell69 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jajajajaaa

    • @BananaBabys
      @BananaBabys 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same

    • @BananaBabys
      @BananaBabys 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      @Corey M. J. Martin-Brock you think you can control your thoughts?

    • @canadianRadio
      @canadianRadio 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      @Corey M. J. Martin-Brock 🤣 Chill, bruh.

  • @kokos1209
    @kokos1209 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to you. Instead of trying to be exactly like other people, try to be a better version of yourself. Try to be calmer, more grateful, more generous, more loving, more understanding, more forgiving, more joyful and happy and less jealous, less angry, less envious, less egocentric, less sad, less bitter...Everyday, try to be better than you were yesterday, even if it's just a little, it matters. It's a key to your healing.

    • @tillyreece8071
      @tillyreece8071 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      thank you SO much for this, this is a brilliant and beautiful bit of advice and i'm going to do this tomorrow 🙏❤

    • @kokos1209
      @kokos1209 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@tillyreece8071 thank you! I hope this advice helps you. I myself am practicing this everyday and i’m a much happier person than i was a year ago!

    • @juliaveronneau
      @juliaveronneau ปีที่แล้ว

      i love this ❤️ the best motto

  • @liabinimelisulzurrun3833
    @liabinimelisulzurrun3833 3 ปีที่แล้ว +789

    I’m my opinion deleting social media is the same a treating the symptoms but not the root of the problem. If we all learn from his words, we should be able to enjoy and look at social media without feeling jealous or comparing ourselves to others.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊

    • @mikhay144
      @mikhay144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Jesus is the only way to eternal life. He died on the cross and rose again on the third day so that you may be forgiven of your sins and saved from hell.Forsake your sin and turn to Christ. You will be set free and have everlasting life. Seek Him with all of your heart and you shall find

    • @gtfo3609
      @gtfo3609 3 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      @@mikhay144 stop pushing your religion

    • @mademagic8430
      @mademagic8430 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      this exactly! the root of the problem is within ourselves, deleting social media isnt taking away the problem. I can scroll through social media without comparing myself & being unhappy or jealous, other ppl cant do the same. The root is within the mind, change the mind & social media wont be able to affect you

    • @operationbroomstick
      @operationbroomstick 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Easier said than done. Unfollow the same people on your contact list and just follow your interest on social media, you will improve

  • @oliverkhrisyahgabe8532
    @oliverkhrisyahgabe8532 2 ปีที่แล้ว +102

    I always remind myself with this quote "No one is you and that is your POWER".

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      sadhu sadhu. thank you so much for sharing Khrisyah 🙂🙂🙂

  • @crisjoseaguilar3495
    @crisjoseaguilar3495 3 ปีที่แล้ว +673

    I’m only 17 but i feel stuck, alone, ugly and depressed! Thank you Mr. Nick, your wisdom is slowly transforming me into a better version of myself.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +116

      Thank you Cris. Just be gentle and patient with yourself. It takes time. Also, if you like, you are welcome to join our online Reddit community. Hear you and connect with others and receive support. There should be a link in the description :-)

    • @tempesnyder6243
      @tempesnyder6243 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yes, his suggestions are positively wonderful.

    • @sd7317
      @sd7317 3 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      I remember being 17, the fact that you saw this video proves you are already on to becoming your own best friend, I already see you as a very beautiful, kind and responsible person.

    • @TheTenof12
      @TheTenof12 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Hey Chris, this is an extremely challengng time. "hang in there" I too feel lonesome & rubbish about my life sometimes. I never expected to feel this way at my age (half Century) I run a gentle group Spirit of The Age Astrology and Spirituality on FB if you would like to join us I'm sure there are folk you would get a long with. Ten ;-) ;-) ;-)

    • @duckgod7370
      @duckgod7370 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      At least you aren't 29.

  • @carijanet7871
    @carijanet7871 3 ปีที่แล้ว +120

    Comparison is a thief of joy

  • @jeffarch1435
    @jeffarch1435 2 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    “if you want to be miserable, just compare yourself to someone.”
    - margaret sanger, holocaust survivor RIP

  • @relax-n-reads1514
    @relax-n-reads1514 3 ปีที่แล้ว +293

    As Mark Twain simply put it, "Comparison is the death of joy."

  • @ciscowarrior
    @ciscowarrior 2 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    I learned to deal to go of jealousy by 1. blessing the person and wishing them more good. 2. filling my head/heart with the thought that my Creator would/could give me the same thing or even better sometime in the future.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Beautiful 😊😊. I love that.

    • @complexjanedoe
      @complexjanedoe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      This is beautiful. Thank you I will use this.

  • @brendahunter9134
    @brendahunter9134 3 ปีที่แล้ว +227

    Jealousy is when you fear someone has stolen the affection of a loved one. Envy is when you think others have something that you can't have. Many people see things others have and feel envy as if they can't have it or better. If you see something that some one has and you want that, celebrate their good fortune and know you can also have it.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      😊

    • @janemh5866
      @janemh5866 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Or, probably more importantly to me, work on accepting that you can't have it and that's ok. There's lots of things we can't have for all different reasons and that's just how it is.

    • @PhuongNguyen-ji8rj
      @PhuongNguyen-ji8rj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @Me4U I am dealing with envy and I'm telling you it gradually damages my inner peace and soul to the point it hurts. That is some kind of pain that has no limits. It is like an invisible prison. I highly suggest no one would let envy enter their mind. When envy somehow wanders around you, please shift your mind to love and care. Maybe I cannot see it and you cannot see it but people that we envy might be dealing with envy themselves. When we decide to sympathize, things get a bit easier. I am on the path to free myself from envy.

    • @jacksonwriterpoet
      @jacksonwriterpoet ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah, but be careful what you wish for! Nick's fifth point is really important here: even if you do get the thing, it will come with its own suffering!

    • @MS-ns4ki
      @MS-ns4ki 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      no one would like me to have anything, and when I do they go wild.

  • @Ange777ify
    @Ange777ify 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    The desideratta says " never compare yourself with others, you will become vain and bitter. For there will always be greater and lesser persons than yourself".

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      😊😊

    • @faizam5789
      @faizam5789 ปีที่แล้ว

      greater and lesser than are perceptions of the ego tho?

  • @arthurlincoln9093
    @arthurlincoln9093 3 ปีที่แล้ว +154

    I looked at a tree in my garden today. Just standing, observing, listening, still, quiet. No need to do anything else. See the bird in branches. Hear the bees in the blossum. See the green if the leaf and the way every leaf allows light fall on the others.
    I felt at complete peace just for a that moment in time.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That's wonderful Arthur :-) keep up the great work

  • @vish1567
    @vish1567 3 ปีที่แล้ว +95

    There's no enemy outside our soul, the real enemies live inside us Anger, hate, ego and greed. 🙏🙏🙏☸☸

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😊😊

    • @destroyermaker
      @destroyermaker 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Transforming bloodshed into beauty and raising the phoenix of forbidden expression - The real war is in us.
      -MIA

  • @amarabeaumont2367
    @amarabeaumont2367 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I like the quote "BE YOURSELF , EVERYONE ELSE IS TAKEN". 😊

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That’s a beautiful quote 😊

  • @avaceleste
    @avaceleste 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

    Let me just add: the background noises of nature and birds is amazing 💚

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you so much ava :-)

    • @violinseetha
      @violinseetha 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you for sharing the wisdom. I felt peace,when I listened.please bless me.

    • @dionneyagla5731
      @dionneyagla5731 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I love the sounds too. Peacocks and roosters!! So nice 🌹❤️

    • @Orangeon-lh8eu
      @Orangeon-lh8eu 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      From an existentialist/gnostic standpoint the birds are actually suffering fighting and looking for food. Humans just here it as “beautiful “ but they’re actually screaming and talking about food and how/where to get it.

  • @Kyouma.
    @Kyouma. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    What really only matters is one question: "Have I gotten a bit better than I was yesterday?"
    Your potential doesn't need comparison with others. It's already there. You just need to unleash it

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      😊😊

    • @Kyouma.
      @Kyouma. 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nickkeomahavong01 Thank you for your videos. They're really helpful and inspirational, Nick 😊

    • @dianaaiello588
      @dianaaiello588 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes

  • @traciemyers4137
    @traciemyers4137 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    The act of comparing ones life to another, then feeling less than, stems from low self esteem. Find the part within you that is injured, acknowledge it, heal it, and let it go.

  • @rtj7397
    @rtj7397 3 ปีที่แล้ว +117

    I used to get jealous easily then I found out I always ended my jealousy with underestimating others to make me feel better! But it's very bad thing to not treat everyone equally and kindly,then I started practicing Buddhism and read few books it's really help me to become good person and not compare myself with other dhamma really teach me to treat people equally and be happy about other people success!
    Who reading this I wish u to get good health, happiness and prosperity ❤️🙏
    Sadhu sadhu sadhu🙏

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you so much for sharing Riti. Hope you're doing well :-)

  • @vhoy7899
    @vhoy7899 3 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    Charity begins at home. Home is the self. We cannot give love if we donot first love ourselves through patience, kindness, respect etc...

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Beautiful ❤️❤️

    • @vhoy7899
      @vhoy7899 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I started an indoor garden to help with my patience and to improvemy garden skill. I'm in NYC. You ever saw a plant grow? It moves at its own speed... very slowly, often like a tortoise. Patience has been my one word for a few years now. I am better but not where I want to be...
      My plants are teaching me THAT LIFE HAPPENS and I am paying attention.

    • @cenedraleaheldra5275
      @cenedraleaheldra5275 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Powerful words thank you

    • @Honestandtruth
      @Honestandtruth 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@vhoy7899 People with Good knowledge and Wisdom can make this Great Comment 👍👍❤️
      Love is Sharing and Helping and Teaching....😃❤️

  • @carolinecarol7223
    @carolinecarol7223 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Guys, I've been in a love relationship for 7 years now, and it's not just roses, poetry, rainbows, and birds singing; there are difficulties too. To think that everything is beautiful is an illusion

  • @kory2697
    @kory2697 3 ปีที่แล้ว +140

    An easy way to do it is to stop using social media and watching TV. I have never been a jealous person, so these things made me so exhausted because I felt like folks were trolling me with their stupid likes and TV was a massive time waste and provoked useless desire. It was the best decision ever, 14 years no TV and 3 years no social media. I'm clueless about pop culture and it feels so great.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      That's a wonderful tip :-)

    • @quorrakai
      @quorrakai 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Absolutely!! I am the same. No TV, no social media except for YT to learn and research. I have no idea what's going on with people's lives and it's great. I'm normally a very private person.

    • @perlitalaguna6622
      @perlitalaguna6622 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Same no TV, cable+ internet bundle. Just the internet from my phone!

    • @ginger732
      @ginger732 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@quorrakai you are a wise human☀️

    • @ginger732
      @ginger732 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@perlitalaguna6622 you are a wise human☮️💜

  • @AnnieLyn
    @AnnieLyn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +84

    Always start your day with a greatful heart, don't compare, don't feel envy to others. 💕

  • @MrPanzerDragoon
    @MrPanzerDragoon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Psychologically, this is the one problem I had growing up. It was ingrained in me at an early age by my parents. It's the worst thought and feeling till this day.

    • @Cherry-lm9rz
      @Cherry-lm9rz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ☹️ try meditating.... almost guaranteed it will help you ❤️

    • @MrPanzerDragoon
      @MrPanzerDragoon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Cherry-lm9rz I've started small recently with the Sam Harris app.

    • @Cherry-lm9rz
      @Cherry-lm9rz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@MrPanzerDragoon
      That’s good. If you enjoy reading, I suggest you buy “ The power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle. I finished reading a few days ago. It has blown my mind away 🤯. The paperback is about 10 bucks. It is life changing ❤️.

    • @MrPanzerDragoon
      @MrPanzerDragoon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Cherry-lm9rz ooh thanks!

    • @Cherry-lm9rz
      @Cherry-lm9rz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@MrPanzerDragoon
      Anytime 🙂

  • @7himmy
    @7himmy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    Love how you said "Train yourself in a gentle way". Words to live by. I often become too critical when I observe my mistakes. And this advice is a great reminder to treat myself with kind was even while I notice my own mistakes and don't guilt-trip myself about them.

  • @dearcharly9110
    @dearcharly9110 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    When I was younger, I always compare my self to other and says, they are lucky and I'm not. But now, I always think that we all have our own karmas. We come back here on earth to do something. We have our own destiny and everyone deserve the best.

  • @ligaya6660
    @ligaya6660 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I've been struggling with comparing and feeling jealous all the time...
    Thank you for this❤️

  • @swelch5541
    @swelch5541 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    That rooster is giving his amens.

  • @camillabartlett9128
    @camillabartlett9128 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Meditation walking
    Share loving kindness compassionate caring with self and then radiate outwards
    Take note of your core and know your blessings with gratitude 🙏

  • @amarabeaumont2367
    @amarabeaumont2367 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Literally catching up on all your videos in 2023! You are the absolute best, This world is so blessed to have you!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Aww thank you so much! Enjoy your time 😊

  • @4RealtorsTurlock
    @4RealtorsTurlock 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I did fall into that trap of thinking others don’t experience suffering. Going to do my best to do the exercises you shared 🙏🏼

  • @darklausal23
    @darklausal23 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I have two coworkers, they are the same age, one looks very young for his age and the other looks old, they compared themselves, one about how the other one looks and the other one about the achievement of the older looking, I told them: you have different priorities and you both had unique experiences so why does it matter what someone else has done or how they look? If you are happy that's all it matters.

  • @iamworth
    @iamworth 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I love this so much. I want to use my jealousy to improve myself not to destroy other peoppe

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Beautiful Lou. Yes use it to gain insight into yourself and also to improve yourself :-)

  • @megakcstar
    @megakcstar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    My heart feels at peace in a new way for the first time in a very very long time

  • @hughp00
    @hughp00 3 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    Another great video Nick. In 1982 my sponsors told me "quit comparing your insides to everybody else's outsides". Something I have continued to work toward on a daily basis for the last almost 39 years. Well presented Nick. As always, stay safe my friend.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you Hugh. And that's great advice from your sponsor :-)

    • @MS-ns4ki
      @MS-ns4ki 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I don't get this , as I don't, trust me LOL

  • @loveienne93
    @loveienne93 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    WHY AM I EVEN CRYING? THIS IS SO GOOD!!!

  • @megakcstar
    @megakcstar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    This video lead to me having a breakthrough!!! I ended up getting in contact with a friend I was jealous of. She moved away and I felt hurt and jealous of her new friends and pushed her away. So I saw your video and cried realizing I could’ve stayed her friend the entire time!!! It’s been three years!!!!!!!!! My heart was so full of love I cannot thank you enough I hope you see this. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for your amazing teachings.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wonderful. I'm glad it's been able to bring you some resolution to your life. That's great to hear my friend 😊

  • @merryana3588
    @merryana3588 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I can feel his compasion ❤

  • @HobbyHarri
    @HobbyHarri ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My mind likes to have imaginary fights with people I've never met, so now I catch myself in that moment and ask myself "Where is my enemy?". Honestly makes me laugh sometimes. Thank you for this video

  • @pasupulasaikumar484
    @pasupulasaikumar484 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Not caring people ! And trying to find peace and joy being alone 😍🥰 it helps to overcome them.

  • @rodrigoalvarado6664
    @rodrigoalvarado6664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Comparison is the thief of joy

  • @jockoffwillink3732
    @jockoffwillink3732 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I take from the last part, life is a game of soccer. Be happy that you are alive and in the game. It certainly beats the hell out of being dead on the bench.

  • @pollypick2854
    @pollypick2854 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    It’s true to the part you mentioned about some single people thinking that those in a romantic relationship must be nicer so they yearn to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend too. it’s all sweet and exciting the first couple of years, then it all becomes hard work when the romance sort of died down.... it’s never easy, being single, you lack of a companion and all the things couples do together but you get to focus on yourself with no distraction and you are free to do whatever you want. Being attached to a partner has it’s good and bad too. It’s all the same in the end like you’ve said. 🙏

  • @lisavillarreal2681
    @lisavillarreal2681 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I have never ever compared myself to others 👍😊I love myself just the way I am and as for being jealous of others never I am the type of person who is happy for others. 💚💜🤍👍😊

  • @Ashley-zt9yh
    @Ashley-zt9yh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    One of the things I’m struggling with is trust. I was watching the video and the portion when you said to “practice spreading love and kindness even to those you dislike until it becomes more natural to you”… my thoughts immediately went to “but how can I trust them”. I immediately responded with fear that if I was kind to them, they would hurt me (not physically). I have been through a lot of Trauma and have so many fear. I have such a lack of trust in anything. I’m so tired of feeling scared all the time. My memories tell me it’s reasonable but I end up just hurting myself. I just want peace in my mind and body.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's ok Ashley. Just give it a try and diligently spread loving kindness and forgiveness to yourself and others everyday. It's definitely a practice 😊

    • @queencass9127
      @queencass9127 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m struggling in the same way…. I’m at a loss……..

  • @annielark6650
    @annielark6650 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I am extremely insecure. I was bullied as a child right upto my teens...the scars are deep. I call this trauma. I was cheated on by partners which only reinforced my feelings of not being good enough and of others being better than me. Im here because I don' t want to feel this way anymore. I know only I can make the decision to allow healing to begin within me...yes i feel that jealousy and insecurity is like a sickness that steals my life force...it takes a lot of energy to live in such a state of self-rejection. Thank you Nick for this message of healing....I hope to absorb it and practice it till it transforms me 💚🌻

    • @Niko-pi3ks
      @Niko-pi3ks 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m sorry you were bullied. You are right it is trauma. My father remembers being bullied as a kid because he was poor and wore the same clothes to school. He said they were clean his mom would wash them everyday

    • @Niko-pi3ks
      @Niko-pi3ks 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      The most beautiful person to me is a kind,good heart, and an authentic smile. The inner beauty shines way brighter than any outer beauty. The most beautiful person on the outside can be the ugliest on the inside.

  • @saferspaces
    @saferspaces ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I randomly clicked on this and realized I badly needed it ... 🙏

  • @ysabellaperez3377
    @ysabellaperez3377 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    This gave me comfort. I’m not a Buddhist but this was very enlightening. Thank you for sharing!

  • @Montevideo2313
    @Montevideo2313 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Interesting insight to "Anumotanaboon" or rejoice in your merit. We do this (well, I do this) with small children. We rejoice every time when a baby tries to walk, or talk...just about anything kids learn something positive, we heap joy and encouragement to keep going. Why do we stop doing that as adults and be super critical (not the healthy kind either). As a parent, I do my best to give myself positive encouragement and strive to be my best in a healthy way so my kids learn to love themselves. Nothing is easy, life is tough and we make mistakes...be kind.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's wonderful. Thank you for sharing this 😊😊

    • @Carolmaizy
      @Carolmaizy 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Beautifully said.

  • @HunniBrown
    @HunniBrown 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I haven't had fb in 7 years. I cannot stand the drama, the bragging, the hate. I'm over it all.

  • @ParkEriciaTV
    @ParkEriciaTV 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I overcome it to focus myself more and love myself more and see the good things of other people..

  • @mjsia8873
    @mjsia8873 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I have been loving kindness to myself every single day even to my coworker.. I can recognize their weakness, sadness, emptiness. I no longer feel anxious, nor angry or jealous. I never felt so alive n full of potentials. God is good. Finally I can say that I am on my journey to be abundant with grace, love and many more. 🙏❤💪. Thank you Nick for sharing ur thoughts. Good quality content.. 🥰

  • @AmmaNonna
    @AmmaNonna 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Off topic - You reply to your comments - a lost compassion. People yearn for a connection. You make the effort. Very compassionate.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you Mrs. Bizzy. I do my best. I think it's important to acknowledge people's efforts. It's very sweet. 🙂🙂

  • @juleerowley9706
    @juleerowley9706 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jealousy and comparison actually fades as you get older.
    Thank God

  • @yunalee13
    @yunalee13 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Whenever I catch myself comparing myself with others, I try to remember the moments that I did great things, so I feel again that I appreciate myself and I start trying to make greater things than in the past :)

  • @knottymom88
    @knottymom88 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I AM OBSESSED WITH YOUR LAUGH...it makes me smile instantly. I can feel the energy an feeling behind It.....just know u are helping me so much and giving comfort..thank u ;) ❤

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hahaha. Thank you so much my friend 😊Greetings to you all the way from Thailand :-) stay safe.

    • @adriananeagu609
      @adriananeagu609 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too ...!😄

  • @meryam9880
    @meryam9880 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Oh my God ! I wrote down that jealousy and comparison are feelings that I have to get red of them .....then took my phone to watch some videos ... Suddenly i find this one 💚

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 welcome to the channel my friend. Hope it was helpful.

  • @carries.9919
    @carries.9919 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I don't go on social media either. At work I don't gossip about others and I try to think about the good points about others. At home I do gardening to connect with nature by feeding birds and hummingbirds. The only thing I have trouble with is loving myself. Go figure, I can look for good things about other people but not myself 🤔 I love your channel 💓❤️🧡💛💚💕

  • @ainelawlor5755
    @ainelawlor5755 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Stop looking at others just look at your self you are worth it you are amazing

  • @ilhaanf663
    @ilhaanf663 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I am a Muslim and I find this to be helpful. If you pray success for others, the angels will say amen and Allah will give you that success to that person and to you as well so this takes away from feeling jealous of someone because you can get what they have if you wish them well

  • @geethanjalihc4078
    @geethanjalihc4078 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Be your own refugee is something that opened my eyes, although I overthink when I feel jealous, I will try and inculcate these tips. MANY THANKS Sir, your smile makes us feel your lightheartedness and also feel calm when listening to your content, Thanks again

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Awww that's very kind of you. thank you so much :)

  • @sweetnayru
    @sweetnayru ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Been really in a rut, I haven’t been comparing myself to others when it comes to craft. Feeling jealous, not good enough. like I haven’t improved and that no one cares. It’s been difficult to navigate these feelings but I’m going to start a journey of bettering my thoughts and putting these tips into action. Thank you so much for this video!

    • @Elle-gm9rt
      @Elle-gm9rt ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I wish you well on this journey. May it be a successful one🤗

  • @madstranger369
    @madstranger369 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I felt soo jealous to my frnss that they are studying well and settle in good job .....after watching your video ..I made my mistake clear 🙏 thank you 🙏om namo buddhaya 🙏🙏🙏

  • @melissagarcialynn5465
    @melissagarcialynn5465 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Amazing. I’ve never heard someone so honest approach on this widespread topic. I wish I had a family member that is a monk. They are very intelligent individuals. Why aren’t there more likes or more people watching this.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much melissa.

    • @melissagarcialynn5465
      @melissagarcialynn5465 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      It’s the truth. Plain and simple, I’m having a good time watching the Dali lama video on you tube of overcoming anger and anxiety it has calmed myself in ways I cannot explain. But when I feel sad angry confused or like I can’t do it anymore I always make a vow of not talking until I can speak peacefully.

  • @iloveyellow7214
    @iloveyellow7214 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Nick? You are one of the highlights that i found in this pandemic. You taught me so many things I do not know how to repay you. I will just pay it forward I guess... And integrate what I learned from you.
    Keep safe and healthy Nick! You are such a blessing Im so happy I found you

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you so much my friend. Yes keep continue to train yourself diligently :-) that is the best gift.

  • @evelyne7071
    @evelyne7071 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Jealousy is lousy. You have a very positive outlook on others, yourself and the betterment of your spirits.

  • @alanahorner8012
    @alanahorner8012 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you so much for this valuable piece of advice. This is the truest thing l have ever heard: Everyone experiences suffering. There was a girl in primary school that was my classmate l used to find her very beautiful and she had the prettiest stuffs, she was also talented she could draw and make jewelry, she was very skinny and elegant. l have to admit l was kind of jealous because l didn't look like her. We talked a bit since she was sitting besides me in class. Turns out she looked that way because she had an illness and she passed away at 20.

  • @liyaaaliyaaaa4508
    @liyaaaliyaaaa4508 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I feel better after watching these. I was so struggling compared myself to others because I couldn’t stop my parents to said things like comparison to me but I can stop myself from having a negative thought about it. And of course it really takes time to stop the thought. Thank you so much, I found these really helpful to me , it made me to look at life in a different ways.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wonderful. I'm glad it was helpful. Thank you my friend 😊😊

  • @koksinglau2494
    @koksinglau2494 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Your tone, smile and body language project calmness. Combined with your words of wisdom, I aldy feel better after listening to you. Greetings from Kuantan, Malaysia

  • @Luna-ho3wj
    @Luna-ho3wj 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Regardlessly of social media it will never go away only way to eliminate is understand their insecurities I am opposite I get a lot jelly beans and know and understand why which help me to carry on.

  • @ratnabahadurgurung9850
    @ratnabahadurgurung9850 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Namo Buddhaye.Thank you bhanteji for your precious preaching.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You’re welcome. Thank you 😊

  • @TheKimbaSimba
    @TheKimbaSimba 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    You’re a beautiful soul with the ability to share profound wisdom in a easily relatable way. You make the world a better place 🙏🏻

  • @supersexypatou
    @supersexypatou 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Where were you all my life? I have been searching for someone like me who speaks from experience. Thank you for all you said and done, helped a lot!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you so much Patrick and welcome to the channel :-) I hope you're doing well

  • @knbsd3876
    @knbsd3876 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The topic of "Suffering" resonated with me. Being single, I feel jealous of couples. Being over 50, I felt wistful when a client gave birth last week. I keep "looking back" and sense frustration that I wasn't a better wife, or I didn't take advantage of a few really great career opportunities. I seems I trying to make up ground that simply isnt there anymore.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes that can be difficult when we have past regrets for sure.

  • @mage6003
    @mage6003 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I just can't conceal how beautiful Ven. Nick is. How he communicate to the viewers and how he share his knowledge & wisdom to the world. Internet should be filled with videos like these.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you so much for your kindness 😊😊

  • @matttheman9740
    @matttheman9740 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thank you so much for this. I really needed this advice, I recently realized how my jealousy of others was taking over me and how toxic it was. It was even getting to the point where I would lie about my life to people just so they don't look down on me, which is embarrassing to admit. I have looked high and low for advice but couldn't seem to find ways to deal with it. This has just came out at the right time for me. Anyways, thanks again Nick, I shall apply this to my practice😊❤️

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wow Matt. I'm glad you're here. There are no coincidences my friend. I hope these tips are helpful for your situation.
      I'm cheering you on all the way from Thailand 😊😊

    • @matttheman9740
      @matttheman9740 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nickkeomahavong01 thank you very much 🙏

  •  3 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    Beautiful words. Thank you 🙏

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thank you so much my friend. Greetings to you from Thailand 😊

    • @mikhay144
      @mikhay144 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jesus is the only way to eternal life. He died on the cross and rose again on the third day so that you may be forgiven of your sins and saved from hell.Forsake your sin and turn to Christ. You will be set free and have everlasting life. Seek Him with all of your heart and you shall find

    • @lamargames3940
      @lamargames3940 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nickkeomahavong01 hi

  • @falldown7xstandup8x83
    @falldown7xstandup8x83 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    COMPARISON IS THE THIEF OF JOY

  • @zjoy2458
    @zjoy2458 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This video is so precious. I ran into it at such great timing it almost feels like it's meant to find me. Anumotanaboon!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sadhu Sadhu 😊😊 thank you so much. Glad it's helpful

  • @MichelleEstrada
    @MichelleEstrada 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    What I do to combat this in the moment is remind myself that what I give is what I get so if I don’t want other people to be jealous of me and hate on me I shouldn’t do that to them so I feel it and then replace it with love and appreciation also the world is abundant one persons greatness doesn’t take away from mine. The only downside is when there’s consistent moments of it in a day for example like if the feeling keeps coming up that’s when it gets tough

  • @boibaguette544
    @boibaguette544 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    THANK you from the bottom of my heart for this Nick! It can sometimes be hard for me to understand and apply spiritual advice so these very hands on tips are much appreciated.
    I am at such a low point in my life right now and this seriously made my day-to-day life a lot easier to handle.

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sadhu sadhu 😀😀 thank you so much and hang in there my friend

  • @Pccpy
    @Pccpy 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I never compare myself to anyone but respect everyone because everyone is unique in their own way.

  • @peggygilbertsen9099
    @peggygilbertsen9099 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    “Bridge that.” I love that. Thank you Nick.

  • @broganb8926
    @broganb8926 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Your videos are amazing and always seem to pop up at the right time for me! I struggle with comparison in the sense of feeling “behind” in life compared to my peers. Career, relationships etc. But I try my best to focus on the fact we are all on our own path and the “behind” feeling is just a societal pressure!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes that's very normal. Just now use the energy to put into your own self work :-) you got this 😊😊

  • @VCPaSe
    @VCPaSe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for sharing your wisdom! I am Christian ✝️, but I am always amazed about how many things Christians and Buddhism share together. In all the things you said the only thing I wouldn’t agree with as a Christian is to find refuge in myself instead of God. A big hug and a lot of respect to you!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wonderful 😊 yes both teachings are beautiful.

  • @baileyjacobus7276
    @baileyjacobus7276 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love his little laughs throughout the video

  • @kichapi
    @kichapi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you Nick for this one. Your tip about giving space for each person in a notebook is helpful for me. Made me realize that each one of us has it's own strengths - just like in a rpg game, we are here to lend our strengths with each other. We just have to recognize what's ours and gather other people that we can share it with. :)

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  2 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's a pleasure. I'm glad it's helpful. thank you.

  • @ashlinglynam1985
    @ashlinglynam1985 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You have an amazing laugh! Thank you for your incredible wisdom 🙌

  • @cindchan
    @cindchan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    A saying I try to follow is: "Everyone is struggling with something. Always be kind." I have been learning to love and accept myself. Trying to learn to not compare myself to others. But the thing I have found the hardest to deal with is when people compare you to others. When you are told that you aren't doing enough compared to what others do. When you are told that you are not "pulling your weight". When you are consistently told that you are not enough, regardless of how hard you work. That is what I struggle with and try to overcome.

  • @lotusflower3638
    @lotusflower3638 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I could never see good in others cause others hurted me so bad!

  • @emmyyb
    @emmyyb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for another wholesome video full of practical tips! I really like the first tip on seeing the qualities we envy of others as expanders. I often feel inferior to those who are further ahead in life than I am and by seeing their qualities as a potential to growth I am able to see them as a giver rather than someone who is taking things away from me. :)

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sadhu Emmy. That's a great perspective to look at people from. We have so many teachers to learn from 😊😊

  • @TheDhammaHub
    @TheDhammaHub 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The Buddha's method of "replacing with the opposite" really does wonders. The mind doesn't work too well with removing... replacing on the other hand =)

  • @Ramosd87
    @Ramosd87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I needed to hear this, thank you.

  • @buddhawagley5564
    @buddhawagley5564 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    It’s always a blessing to hear from you!! Thank you 😊

  • @definitelymaybe_cath
    @definitelymaybe_cath 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Thank you for posting every morning!
    I like starting my day with these kinds of reminders.
    -sending peace from Philippines!

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you catherine. I'm glad it's helpful :) Greetings to you from Thailand.

  • @astrotarotbyelenavaldez
    @astrotarotbyelenavaldez 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This is one of the best videos I've ever seen on YT. Thank you for your beautiful energy and wisdom. ❤

  • @mariabejaranomonge2183
    @mariabejaranomonge2183 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Oh Nick, it's always a gift listening to you! Thanks for sharing these beautiful teachings. 🙏✨✨✨

    • @nickkeomahavong01
      @nickkeomahavong01  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you so much Maria. I hope you're doing well :-)

  • @lailadavids
    @lailadavids ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I just turned 40 and am starting to feel jelly about younger women who still have their youth and strength. I took so much pride in mine over h the years and am scrutinizing myself for not maintaining youthful looks or feeling a little competitive and ugly inside with the feeling of jelly when I see a young person at the gym ,especially when I feel my other person seems to show attraction to them .
    I hate this ego . It’s so hard to let go.