5 Signs Your Narcissistic Husband Is Secretly Gay
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 ก.ค. 2024
- Disclaimer: The content provided in this video is meant for educational and informational purposes only, and does not intend to malign or negatively represent any individual or community. This video is specifically focused on discussing the behavior of narcissistic individuals who may not be honest about their sexual orientation within the context of marriage.
Additionally, the content of this video is not aimed at making generalizations about the LGBTQ+ community, and it is not a commentary on the community as a whole. This video should not be used as a basis for making assumptions about any group of people.
It is imperative to approach this topic with sensitivity and respect for individual experiences and identities. Any viewpoints or opinions expressed in this video are solely those of the creator and do not reflect the diverse realities and nuances of people’s lives. Please consume this content responsibly and critically.
CHAPTERS
00:00 Intro
01:03 Sex always feels artificial, forced, robotics or inexperienced
02:52 They obsessively notice male bodies
03:41 He May bring a random men home
04:23 He has strange and questionable history of romantic relationship
05:02 He has toxic shame round his identity
05:55 He has wired grooming and dressing habits
06:36 You always feel there is something hidden in the expression
07:28 Summary
Let's connect on Instagram
instagram.com/narcabusecoach
1. sex feels robotic, forced, unnatural or he avoids it.
2. They notice male bodies, comments on male physique, disinterested in women's bodies.
3. Brings male friends home. Goes out for long hours for guy time. acts sneaky.
4. Hazy relationship past.
5. Extreme homophobia. belittles gay men.
6. weird grooming/dressing habits.
7. cross dressing
8. you feel something is missing or hidden but you can't put your finger on it.
Towards the end the nex would have a particular outfit he would wear when he went out -tight jeans and a wallet in a chain that hung from his jeans pocket and he would wear a tight undergarment that he called his spanx-I was so in the fog I barely reacted
Also he would do a ‘walk’and inwanted to say if I didn’t know you I’d think you were gay but I kept that thought quiet
I remember the Robotic sex. It was awful. He showed no interest in the female body. He avoided looking at my body naked. Other Men were fascinated and couldn't get enough of looking and touching. He was very odd. I was so happy when I called time on the sex. Later on, I found out he was a, 'Rent Boy'.
I think most if not all narcissist have bisexual tendencies.
Try-sexual .. Narcs will try anything.
Scott:
Yes.
That would not surprise me AT ALL, now that you mention it. 🤔
@@cc1k435 All they care about is narcissistic supply. Whether they get it from a male or female i think is irrelevant to them. I had a fake jealous “friend” narc who was jealpus of me and did a nasty online smear campaign on me by stealing my identity and slapping it on his book and taking something I said out of its context and remixing that with a buncha lies and omitting everything else I said that at one point had transgender porn in his house. At the time I wasnt educated about npd and wasnt paying attention but thought that was weird. As a straight man i dont wanna see that and I remember him just saying wierd stuff was interesting but from my experience as a straight man u watch the porn that u are sexually interested in. That was one among many other red flags about him in hindsight. At the time like i said i wasnt educated about npd and wasnt paying attention to much but what I think it is is subconsciously I just didnt wanna believe that what I thought was my friend was secretly a homosexual so my subconscious tried to bury it under cognitive dissonance. Like when he first became jealous and envious of me and my success and was slick doing things worse than an enemy to me to try and sabotage me. Cognitive dissonance kicked in and it was confusing and hurtful.
Anyone who gives them supply
All narcs swing both ways.
And many are pedophiles.
Watch out for universals.
This has been my experience as well.
They always have a close buddy he goes "fishing with" or other crap. Actually creates triangles with the buddy. Also goes on "business trips"
YES-he seemed very very inexperienced-like he had no clue
Incapable of passion or sensuality and finishes in 2 seconds flat
That's the norm after a while, I think. They often believe they are entitled to a lot of variety in partners.
Yep!!! Same here, always have some excuses as to why he's done so quickly 😭😭 smh
@@user-uk3eh8ne7q they leave you completely out of the equation.
This is very important topic and you are very brave to take on the subject. You precisely hit on all the red flags and actions of my ex who wasted 17 YEARS of my life by pretending all the time. I was never thin enough, pretty enough, etc. He also had a good friend whose brother was gay and married to a very rich man (Behind the Human Rights group in DC and also Heir to the a part of the Coca-Cola family!). he would constantly mention how jealous he was of this happy gay couple.
Also when he got a calf massage from his friend's gay brother's friend, he said how it was fun. Still not that big of a red flag. One big deal was how he was always looking at male celebrities and commenting how handsome they were. With every other straight man they barely seem to know what the criteria is for looking good!
His weird son-husband relationship woth him Narcsisist Mother also disturbed me. He would always look for and follow her advice even when he reached the point of being a 35 year old professional with multiple graduate degree.The few times I brought up it would be okay if he was ever gay, he got in a rage and blamed how he acted on ME.
He even started going to female strippers because he couldn't keep an erection with me for more than 1 minute. Im actually a cute gilr so it was weird and upsetting. He said the strippers would get him hard because of their "tiny little asian asses" He has a super liberal family who would have been fine either way, but to him he is so obsessed with image that he convinced himself that if he had a rich and super thin YOUNG wife, then everything would be fine. In retrospect
I think I always knew. I even thought to myself when we met that he was "too hot to be straight!." (Always at the gym when not working, spend tons of hair products, facial masks, clothes)
Your gut will usually warn you and it should never be ignored!
Hey there. I'm in a different situation, but I had been that stripper. That's where I met my narcissist. We had too much I common and there were too many coincidences that we grew together over time and eventually got married. He's always had questionable tendencies, so early on I figured he was secretly bi. 10 years later nothing has changed. He flames me for not being as hot as I used to be and comments on how so-and-so is a good looking guy. Then, he always says "I'm not gay..." Denial! I'm glad to hear you're doing well! I hope you find your true happiness! Thank you for sharing ❤
God bless you. So many women with similar experience, etc. As women get older, realize it was not their problem but his, they start to talk. You can be at a charity luncheon and if some one brings up their first marriage, the flood gates open. You have survived and I pray you thrive and find happiness. Just remember the red flags.❤️
This is a great video. I would add that these closeted men go after young, inexperienced, well brought up young women. They usually have great manners and are well educated. My ex was a fine athlete and had married male friends with kids. Their wives were my friends. Dont be fooled! I am a Baby Boomer so there was little info out there, unlike today. I have met so many women married for years until their husbands came out. They will charm your mother and father! They will bring thoughful gifts, dress well, look manly,etc. Everything will change within 24 hrs of the wedding! After you have wasted years of your life trying to please him and the "cat is out of the bag," you will find his family is furious with you bcs they always knew but thought you would "cure" him. No matter what, everything will be all your fault! With any luck you will find there is a whole world of less than perfect great guys. If he seemed too good to be true, he was! Thank you Danish, you are the bravest man speaking truth. God bless❤️
You said these closeted narc gays go after young, inexperienced, well brought up young woman. Exactly. "well brought up" translates there's probably money in her family. Young and inexperienced translates into easy to dominate and exploit. THAT is why they are in the closet. They WANT a woman, somebody to exploit, and want a girl with money. And if they get her pregnant, have a couple kids, they know they can quit their job and have the family support him for the sake of their kids. They're not in the closet for fear of social disapproval. They're in the closet because they think (correctly) that a woman won't want to date or marry a gay guy, and narcs are predators and want a woman to exploit. (And vice versa of course, narc woman want a man to exploit.)
I realized my ex was sitting in a very effeminate way one day and it hit me, 13 years after meeting him, that it wasnt just narcissism but gay tendencies. He used me to present an image of stability to his friends and family but he never really fully acted like he even liked to be around me or touch me, just said he wanted to be together. I was young and dumb, and really attracted to him.
When I gently asked him if he ever considered it and pointed out those traits he told me that he wasn't feminine but I was too masculine, and he never liked that about me, that he was never attracted to me, and this is the problem in society, women don't give men the respect they should, and I raised our daughter all wrong. I said "ok, even if I'm masculine, that didn't help your case, you chose to marry a masculine woman." And he said "I'm not doing this." There was an older "uncle" type man who was flaming gay that he was starting to spend time with, his brother's stepfather, and it was clear the guy was grooming him. I wasn't trying to hurt his feelings, just warn him about the guy, my ex was looking for a father figure while the guy was handing him tons of liquor with a creepy smile. It didn't sit well with me, no matter my history with my ex, I don't want him to be preyed on. Anyways, I think anyone being questioned about their sexuality could get irritated but the anger and level of deflection he responded with ("I was never attracted to you because you aren't feminine ENOUGH? See? See how straight I am?")
Sex with him was always awful, boring, mechanical, he would hardly look at me, started sleeping in the other room right after we got married.
Thank you for speaking about this. I hope in the near future people aren't so obsessed with things like this that people can't be themselves and don't feel the need to hide and drag others along.
Being with a narcissist for seven years before I gained the strength to walk away for good; I could count the times we had sex and when I asked about this disconnection I was made to feel like some hungry nymph for daring to want closeness. He tried to play the male and female, cooking and cleaning and feeling affronted if I tried to assist. In his case I think he was angry because he couldn’t admit to himself that he actually hated women and preferred male company. Thank you for bringing this hidden issue into the light 🙏🏾
😂😂😂😂😂when Danish said " butt plugs " I almost spit out my drink. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I see what you’re saying, that word sounds funny coming from him 😂🤭🤭
@ali mccreery I was literally taking a drink of water, and I almost spit it on my phone.
@@WuHongLee that’s funny, one time I was eating a pepperoni stick and something made me laugh and the pepperoni went up in my nasal passages and burned my nose. Good for you it was only water 😂😂😂😂😂🤭
😂
😂 @2:11
What about pornography?? Instead of touching or making love to your partner they rather get off on that to me that is beyond humiliating
ohh, that must have really tough for you. It must have really hurt you. Well, hopefully you are out of that situation and away from such a person.
@@debra8883 yes. It was more than just that his narcissistic behavior got me ill I had to be out of not I would have lost it it’s crazy how much clearer you see things once you begin to the healing journey though I know it will take time but I will rather sacrifice and struggle than have to go through what he put me through mentally he totally drained me to the point that I didn’t even know who I was anymore 🙁
Thank you for being so open Danish-this is a tricky part of the abuse to understand
I thought my ex was, not just ordinary gay, but "prison gay". He had crushes on dangerous, violent men. When he bought weed he socialised with the very worst sorts. And yes, sex was almost anti- female. Degrading and weird. However he was vehemently against gay rights!!??
Maybe this narcissist was formed by being molested as a child?
That’s because of shame
They hate themselves. That's why they project their hatred towards LGBT people.
He didn't want sex when we were alone but if we were visiting family on vac or if guests were staying with us he wanted sex with obvious noises.
Omg same girl same. He NEVER wanted sex but his pastor buddy came to stay over to “hunt” (deer hunting I guess) he wanted to have loud sex. Im still really disturbed by this. but when the guy woke up he decided it was too cold to go hunting. Meanwhile my little 4 year old was outside playing in a puddle without a jacket and was just fine. 😂 Looking back I see he had a major crush on that guy.
he swings both ways but likes degrading/ disgusting activity
I'm so glad this topic is being talked about.
We were married for forty years.
No children by both our choice.
He always more fishing on the weekend.
He started coming home with sweatpants on. But left the house in jeans.
I buy his t-shirts. Guess what he started coming home with a different brand name t-shirt brand.
Late-night calls from drunk men.
There was something about the men's bathroom at Wal-Mart.
First thing he would go to the men's bathroom. Hmmm.
Totally understand!!
I have found This episode helpful. You are right about what such narcisistic men do. They wreak havoc and destruction in the lives of those closest to them.
I felt my ex went both ways . Wanted back entrance a lot too plus when men hit on him he accepted it well too . I left that mess last year
So much of this rings true. My experience involved amazing sex (his only method of lovebombing) followed by the withdrawal/withholding/rejection and “you’re not enough” messages. Brutal.
This needs to be brought to the forefront. I see this happening in some regions in particular.
Middle East and mediteranian countries.....
@@wittesneeuw you know it!!!
@@user-ly7en7bg1jWe both! Once you open your eyes for the truth......You can start to be really alive. And many more people at all these internet communities. So heartwarming to share all our experiences at a safe place.
@@wittesneeuwyou are so right on mediterranean countries. My greek ex was so obviously gay. I tricked myself that i was being paranoid and that he was just gentle and soft spoken...In the end he couldnt perform at all with me. And made some confessions. Why he doesnt live honestly with himself is beyond me as hes far away from his country...
They fool themselves the most.....And want everybody to act with them in their fake life....Good for you you saw through it and good luck with reality!
A gay man finding a woman's smells a turn off is the epitome of irony.
OMG! A lot of them have a peculiar scent to them too if you pay attention. It's like they try to cover up a smell of semen using scents similar to perfume. It's weird.
He was heavily into porn,this was back in the 80's,he borrowed a film called "the boat" it turned out to be male gay porn ,he protested way too much,but went and borrowed it again, another time we went to a city pub turned out to be a drag bar omg he would not shut up about it for months he kept wanting to go back,he always was in the pub and always fighting I think it was who he was attracted too he wanted to spend more time with men than me and his children, never understood it but I do now I thank God every day that I divorced him!!
Absolutely correct on all accounts! My narcissist exhibits about 80% of the traits discussed in this video. I don't even bother trying to have sex as I feel, scratch that, I know he's not thinking about me in the moment. I would love to say more, but I'm being hovered-over. 😮💨
I had a boss that was married and I thought was straight and looks straight but I noticed high gay tendencies that I figured out he was gay and I was shocked he was playing a straight man to a woman. I never met his wife but I felt so sorry because my other boss is an open gay male and demanded this other guy to be his assistant manager. I believe they have a relationship secretly.. smh
I don’t want you to lose your job but if I were you and I knew 💯 I’d tell her. ❤
You just know her life sucks so bad but she doesn’t know why.
This is HUGGGGEEEE...MANY NARCS ARE CLOSET GAY AND BI!!!! Its super subtle...listen to your inner voice! Listen to his sexual fantasies!! Does he get pedicures? How into his body grooming is he???
I was boney thin but he always said I was too fat.
Ohhh...I'm so naieve. My last narc, his previous significant other of 4 years thought he was gay. He had no interest in sex with her, it never happened even once. He had no interest in me that way either, which was fine as we weren't married. But it struck me as odd. Here's a new one - he told me and his previous significant other that he had herpes but neither of us believed him. I thought he had no libido from getting older and smoked a lot of pot, then thought he was probably just more into porn. He's gay. He went out of his way to say he wasn't (odd) and that he didn't like the gay stuff but he's more New Agey and Hippy and drugs and liberal, so seemed strange. I wondered if he had been raped as a kid. No, he's gay. But he wants a girlfriend for sure - to be his mommy and exploit. THAT is why he hides it.
This is accurate and this is what I speak to my clients about all the time!
That was my malignant narc. In the end violent. Worse 4 years of my life. All of the above except for butt plugs what are they? Lol Gave me so many STDs all curable except one and, he said, he was branding me so no one else would want me now. He was wrong. It’s quite triggering hearing this video but I want to share to help others, it took me awhile to accept all the evidence but this video sums it up and is validating.
That is a real piece of trash doing that to you just to try to ruin you. It’s his way of always having to remember him. Glad you have moved on and hopefully found happiness.
Im very sorry. And even the uncurable STDs have solutions. I hope youre okay now.
This one hits home! My ex was abused by the church, which I didn't learn of until we had been married 17 years and 3 kids later. My first red flag should have been him wanting annal sex when we were dating. I tried once - hated it - never again. After learning of the abuse he sued the catholic church, but before he could do that, he had to go to counseling. From that he was diagnosed as a "sex addict". Which explained a lot of his constant need for sex and he didn't care where (i.e., in the kitchen with kids around or anyone else for that matter!) And he announced it to me like a badge of honor when he completed his counseling sessions "guess what, I'm a Sex Addict"!! However, he NEVER sought help for said addiction. So we continued the battle of sex anywhere and all the time - which made me feel like an object for another 20+ years. After the kids were grown and our middle daughter graduated college, he dropped the bomb that he wanted a divorce. Said the "rejection" was too much. I was unemployed at the time and we had just built a new home 18 months prior. So much to unpack here - so many lies. Our youngest was in her sr. year of college. So going thru the separation, I discovered a laptop (motherboard was dead, but hard drive was still viable) that had a profile for a male dating website where he was seeking male hook-up as a self proclaimed Bisexual - and I had no idea how long this was going on. To this day he does not speak to his children, not a big issue because he was never part of their lives while they were growing up, but I told them the truth and I believe he is embarrassed by his new identity even tho he is with another female to cover his real self. So many of your videos are my story!
After I filed for divorce and got him out of house, found all kinds of gay stuff. He also told people he wasnt paying child support bcs our daughter was not his! Told people I ran around on him, just awful stuff. They really try to ruin you with so many lies. I hate this commonly cited idea/excuse that if a person suffered child abuse, they become abusers. It is a narc failing to take respondsibility. The people I have met who have suffered child abuse do the opposite. 🙏🏻❤️
Yes I couldn’t put a finger on it 🤣🤣🤣😂😂
Knew something was wrong when we took our daughter to a Britney Spears concert…. 10th row. He wasn’t even paying attention
I dunno, Britney is kind of worshipped by a lot of gay men. Must have been a very studied way of "ignoring" her, either way.
Omgggg really the sex was like empty no connection and he was always homophonic especially if it was in tv
The only thing he ever complimented me on was when I got my eye brows waxed. Really eyebrows? When it was all over he told me that I never wanted to have sex. What a joke. He was not really that interested in sex WHAT A WEIRDO.
Don't take it personally. A narc always tell on themselves via projection. If they say you look fat, it means they think they look fat. If they accuse you of adultery, they are the ones cheating.
How many of you ladies have been accused of being lesbian simply because you go out periodically with your female friends (both married and single)??? I would say this a HUGE projection and A TELL!!! Also, in 18 years would NEVER come clean about previous relationships or why it took him until 40 to marry (yay me 😩)! Also, self-employed and has a one room office-he, himself, and him-ZERO coworkers-in other words, ZERO accountability as to whereabouts ALL….WEEK….LONG!!! Never shares details about his “workdays” and so, never asks or shows any interest about my work days with multiple coworkers and patients (aka “don’t ask, don’t tell!). Showers constantly. Gets giddy around his male friends but flat affect toward females (he latently hates his mother, so, a misogynist!!). Ya think this fits?? That’s a rhetorical question BTW. Thanks for another 💯‼️validating video, Danish.
I was in a talking stage with a Narcissistic closeted gay man and he always kept calling me a lesbian even though I kept telling him that I'm straight.... it's SELF PROJECTION!!! Sister I feel you....I feel really sorry for you....I never became his girlfriend...I dumped him soon afterwards.... thankfully it was just talking stage in my case and luckily he couldn't damage my mental health anymore than that !
Waiting till age thirty is a red flag, forty is a big red flag. Usually.
I dated a narcissistc women for 1year, oh god! She was secretly a Lesbian too!
All narcs swing both ways.
@@ty8xhuohm 95% narcissistic women these days are lesbians(even pan-sexual) but pretend to be heterosexual only to use and brutaly emasculate vulernable men,while they're misandrist to the core in the guise of women empowerment!
How do you tell if a woman is closeted? I am just curious.
Actually, this aspect of narc women rarely gets addressed. It would be interesting if Danish made a video on this.
Thank you for discussing this. I have a very strong feeling that my ex malignant covert narcissist is bisexual. Here are some of the red flags I experienced there is more but I'll share a few….
1. He was obsessed with anal sex even though I expressed clearly that I don’t do that, have no interest or want to do that. He kept bringing it up anyway.
2. Sex felt fake because he would over do it. Nothing was ever enough. It was just weird and draining. I don’t ever want to do that again!
3. He would go on and on how he doesn’t like men to the point it got weird and I wondered is he trying to convince himself that he doesn’t like men
4. He criticized my ability to do makeup. He even told me one time that he could do makeup better than me 😂
5. He had very feminine tendencies and he would claim that it’s because he was raised around a lot of women. (Yeah…right?, coming from a compulsive liar) He would cross his legs like a woman as well every one noticed it.
I just wish he would be honest because there is someone who will love and accept you the way you are and stop using people but sadly that’s not going to happen. I’m so happy that I’m no contact that I might burst from happiness! Be safe everyone!
@Blanco Tequila 😂😂😂
I know my ex was bi. It was too many signs to miss. He wanted to have a 3sum with a man involved though he said he wouldnt touch the man😂, he would lift his leg up during oral sex, then he asked would i be with a man that liked other men... uh if thats not a confession i don't know what is... its more red flags besides just those, thats just all i needed to know.
So a lot of thesw is just u being judgy
@Blanco Tequila yeah i can tell common sense isnt something youre open to. CHIIIILLLLEEE. Tbvh idgaf whether you wanna hear the truth or not. Ppl crossing their legs isnt a red flag of gayness. Yall need to grow tf up "chile"
Chile is a country isnt it? Yeah. Whats sad is that theres all these ways to find educational information in todqys world but yall are still ratteling off lists about homophobia from the 50s. Not shocking tho. Given the obvious. Keep thinking how someone sits is what mqkes them gay. Super shmart.
@@vivien4806 Thank you for demonstrating what gaslighting is.
Absolutely interesting topic, extremely educative ! Weldon sir
I love you danish. Youre so intellifent and lsitening to you is a joy. Your articulation is so so refreshing. Thanks !!
I think my ex might be a closeted bisexual. He also used to tell me that every man I found attractive was gay. It was a very weird thing to do.
Thank you, well done. This is the exact video I had been hoping to find. This covers most of my experience too. My covert narcissistic husband of 15 years was, however, privately very supportive of gay rights. Ie: It always surprised me how passionately he reacted to gay rights news stories while sat stone faced during other equally upsetting human rights stories. I SO should have trusted my gut all along ! He would generally only maintain an erection if we switched to anal sex. When I gently and supportively talked to him about what I was suspecting he would deny it and act disappointed in me.
....why did you repeatedly allow him to switch to anal sex?
One of my biggest "crimes" is bringing up my insecurities over how for years he encouraged me to wear a you know device that mimics male parts. I'm told that I'm ruining our marriage by wanting to talk about these desires.
yeah, there was always something wrong with me.
I have seen this scenario.Thanks Darnish.
Woaaa the constantly cleaning his front or behind blew me away I actually knew someone like this who obsessed about always being extra fresh for work and right after work alleging they we just clean freaks but I know the truth now
Hi Danish, you are so accurate,,after our separation I found out that his bisexual and a cross dresser.he also confessed that he loves wearing panties under his trousers and red lipstick.
This is me. I’m a woman who married a covert secretly gay narc. After the honeymoon there was no sex. 3-4x /year and only if he wanted something badly enough from me. Personality flip started with engagement and full flip after honeymoon. I wished he would look at me the way he looked at 2 friends and a cousin. Totally obsessed with his looks. Severe homophobe. Extreme misogynist. COLD. I can’t explain how cruel this is. Divorced his ass. It was all a front and a lie. Took me years to recover from his abuse.
The horror
It has been nearly 2 years since I left this ass of a man. I am still in recovery from his abuses. My three brothers are furious with him. I had to run away to my family, out of state just to be safe from him, as he was raging day and night. His true sexuality did not show up until the end. I did see a hint of it when I was first married to him 20 years ago. Now, I am on my 20 years and I don't have to worry about him at all.
I dated a narc man, and your description fits him perfectly. 😢😢😢 He used to manipulate me with sex and bring random men home to give them 'haircuts'. He also had an 'obsession' with athleticism, and was a liar
Yes, I think he is. Really, I do. Luckily, we are moving separately because this could get bad.
If they can get supply, they don’t care which way they go.
He loves show tunes and Madonna's Greatest Hits and secretly watches Cabarete on TCM
Yes, I dated a Narcissistic gay man. He loved theater (children’s theater) 😳 One big thing he did was overeat every night to avoid intimacy 💙🙏🏻💙
whoa 🤯
As long as there is supply they don't care , from a male or female
Lmao. Now I know I’m not crazy or being mean. The ex narc always had that one “buddy”. I truly believe he is bisexual.
This is my “question” for more than 25 years of marriage.
Possibility his a gay, because he is super coward, super hate - homophobia, his voice suddenly change every time talking with men, softer and gentle like high pitch, doesn’t have desire on me his wife after our 1st son born, I’ve found his pictures with his old mate, unusual pictures & location, when he was early 20s. Also bisexual, because he is very very easy flirting with opposite sex no matter where is the race is come from and how young these girls, he doesn’t care and never realise that’s is wrong. Still pray 5x a day, plus Friday prayer, we have to adult sons, and still unrealistic reason that yelling to me, flirting to opposite sex, watched internet porn, compliments to prostitution, cranky like 5yo child, hurting his self when he’s angry, lying, are right for him. Good position in his job but unfortunately all of his colleagues doesn’t know that’s he is insane. Doesn’t have one single friend at all. My friends are his friends but his friends or colleagues I have no chance to know them. Never bring me to his office party but always join my party with my coworkers and friends.Devil inside him, he is looks as a gentle Muslim Asian man from outside. Very manipulative. Yes I believe he is gay or bisexual. BUT very very expert hiding these secret behind me.
Wow sister. Inshallah Allah helps your situation and remove him from your life while finding a solid Muslim man to replace him.
My ex Gabriel Gilbert was a closet homosexual. He secretly had a sexual relationship with his older brother Julian Gilbert throughout high-school.
No way??!?
Older blood brother?
Well said
He acted like he didn't know where my vajaja was after several years of being with me. Always trying to slip it in the other place. Would get very excited when he was successful. Yuk! He really hated gays and was always telling nasty stories about them.
I sort of wonder a from a biological standpoint, nature versus nurture, how much narcissistic parents actually influence the decision for people in life regarding sexuality as people mature. (like the video creator, I am not concerned with a person's choice in sexuality). When you think about the psychopathic narcissists, homosexuality often seems to be an underlying issue for their rage/anger/contempt (narcissists in general). My father was unfaithful in his marriage, leading to divorce. Mother seemed VERY prude while I was growing up (the wife says, she thought she was a nun when meeting her). If there was sexual stuff, say on TV, there was disgust on her face (very conservative), so I wonder if her own vulnerable female narcissistic tendencies, were equally balanced in their relationship failing (perhaps withholding sexuality, feeling it was below her or vulgar), while very successful money maker, couldn't keep his package contained. It seems to me, the patterns of narcissistic parenting, can overpower nature by the trauma that begins in childhood regarding sexuality, or atleast has a pretty strong influence on people. The childhood victim of these attacks has their very identity rattled to it's core in life. I look at my own issues that are not sexual, and often think to myself, how much they altered who I really am by living in what felt like a prison/combat zone. It is not surprising to me how much the NPD's toxic poison changes people, body/brain chemistry.
I had not been up to our mtn. home for a while. I was looking for a stamp +opened the drawer in front of my other half's computer. What I discovered was a " a shitty butt plug"! He is a retired Marine. I guess that "don't ask don't tell" saying rings true.
My ex husband cheated but don’t know if the incidence was one. Constantly told him it is forbidden in our faith but he was not agreeable. He said he would never be in same room with a guy, but when our children visited him he was sharing room with male friend.
Yup, obsessed with his grooming to a very strange level. And ughhh the narcs that are religious are the worst.
At least the salve to us is God can t be fooled
Married 35yrs to narcissist man who used sex as a punishment. I mean if I challenged him or disagreed, it meant no sex. He'd constantly groom his pubic area even though he wasn't having sex with me. Most of his friends are gay. He loved going to nude (gay) beaches and would parade himself up and down the beach to be admired. One vacation, to my surprise was spent with his gay friend tagging along the entire trip. He wouldn't let me see/touch his cell phone and shut his computer when I'd enter the room. Yet, he had several affairs with women during our marriage. Is he Gay or Bi?
So funny you say this, I was feeling like a ‘prop’ with this one dude.. super awkward with intimate touches. Made comments about accidentally picking up a transsexual… ??what man wouldn’t know?? Seriously. Fussy and peculiar. Had a male masseuse as a roommate for a while. Paid rent with massage..Now I wonder??
Yes exactly what i was searching foe. I used to just keep thinking this may be henis a gay but how to get proof of this is something i can never figure out . I wish i wdhave broke up with that shit long ago. 15 years of hell. Wish i wd have finished and got out of this insult long back and moved on
Is this a Repost? Iwilll put My Hand on the Bible- I Swear I've Heard this Word for Word, Exactly about 4-5 Months Ago.
BTW- My Narcissistic Husband Was Gay. But I Escaped 29 Years ago. He Evil Continued to Ruin Me for the Next 17 Years.
My Bit of Advice- No Matter How IN LOVE or Whatever You Feel about a Person- NEVER let them Find Out Your Social Security Number!!!
Your Mother Doesn't even Remember it!
(There Could Be a Case Here or there.....)
Facts........All Facts I Was in a Relationship with a Gay Narcissist But I Didn't Know it Until I Got Away From Him Some How I Knew I Wasn't Crazy or Alone Thank u Danish Ase'
One of my ex-narcs wanted anal done to him. Could be straight fascade or bi. He called me a year or so after I broke up with him and told me about his one night stand, begged for me to take him back. He was also somewhat homophobic and would go through periodic religious bouts, but was too lazy to be religious. My other narcissist loves money, I don't think he cares for people at all, just their bankroll. Any partner that stays is getting to share a house and a 30 year mortgage, have fun with the lawyer bill deal. For money, I think he would consider anything but have no evidence either has. I wish all people were honest about their attraction, my aunt has always been lesbian. My exes are in the myself or my mother wouldn't be surprised if we found out later they did change preferences. Honestly I think they will treat their partners badly no matter the gender.
Alot in this seems odd, you should question why you chose this man people like this. You didn't just not get attracted to him. I find it odd that people are into these things, stick with these people and then demonize them without much self reflection.
It's good to get rid of them, even if you are alone.
My ex is a homosexual.
Mine turned out to be a secret crossdresser, maybe gay, or not, I don’t know. I found out after 25 years (!) together. So it had been a BIG secret. But I have always been wondering what was off. And now I know. But when I finally found out, it was not to be discussed. When I tried, and I am really open minded (there could be some mutual fun to experience), he every time got into a rage. So I was the one to blame for whatever he came up with to distract me from the discussion over the questions I had. And we never came to connect on this subject. And only a few months after this discovery I made, he discarded me forever. To be with his new wife and her kids, that he was soooo in love with ….. 😢😳😱
Yes my x husband always gave me a hard time always always wanted sex in the butt. I wouldn’t do it then once he wore me down and said ok then he said no he didn’t feel right about it. My fault again somehow. Always blamed me saying I didn’t do something right. I had to shower or I was gross then he would come in two seconds it was my fault someway. All these points are 💯in my experience.
Does the female narcissist have similar hidden tendencies?
It was robotic, unsatisfactory and made me feel gross. His male friend acting like a jealous girlfriend all the time was another giveaway. Currently, he claims to have a girlfriend that he, "....does not talk about because she is private..." . He did come right out and admit that he is fluid (whatever that means). One more thing I think is odd: he has a full head of hair, yet shaves his head. As a man in his mid-50's, shouldn't he be showing off the fact that he has hair?
I found a pair of XXL jockey shorts in his laundry not once, but twice and he wears a medium?!?! I also found 3, 3XL tshirts with stains on them, in his laundry and he wears a large tshirt. When I asked him, he said he didn’t know how they got there!?!?! I have finally left him, due to domestic violence, and still never found out what that was about. He also had a homeless neighborhood older teen boy, hiding outside by his car? I saw him and my ex said “Don’t worry, he’s OK.”
!!! So he brought home a very gay man, i have a spare room, so it just seemed like they were just associating.. but then the guy moves in, and starts hanging out with me, so then a few weeks go by and i start seeing the narc abusing him the way he did to me ( loud being mean controlling ect) then i see the narc 1 day break a tv of the gay guy. Then it hit me ( omg he couldn't bring a another chick home so he brought a dude straight in front of my face)... SOME ONE TELL ME WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED???!
This guy has attached himself 3 years ago, when I try to get him to leave he just tries to sabotage and starts turning off the water. Even when I am being nice he always steals and breaks my possession. I assume it was to appease his " secret male lover"
Constant pressure for anal sex…I never was willing. He did it all the more. I always assumed it was to annoy and abuse me?
Maybe not? 😮
5:47 sometimes they pretend to support gay people and even befriend them to make it seem that way.. so almost missed the sign until I remember a story about him “being hooked up by his friends” with a trans woman. Definitely hung around male friends more but I didn’t take that into consideration bc most men do..
however it was the grooming behavior. That sealed the deal and the foggy dating history.
I know about one who bought him a porsche when having a family with little kids......Always on a diet and extreme sporting and talking all the time about his results. Because he is extreme gaslighting all the time we always make fun of him at home and think he is picking up young guys with his car.....So this video is very good possible.....But of course it can also be a heavy midlife....LOL
the narcissist i know seduced his gay nephew had an afair with him he must of been low on supply when he had the relationship
My ex was gay and start sleeping cover his gays best friend house and brainwashed me into thinking that was normal
I caught him trying on my under clothes in the middle of the night when he thought I was asleep I never questioned him
😂😂😂😂😂 wow.
He touched himself while watching male basketball.
Yes yes and yes!!!! Wow
Actually I have to think about him
He was always telling me that many rich men asked him to have sex and give him money but he refuses all the time… hilarious 😂😂😂 after i left I found out he was doing this for money all time
yes
Yes
Yesss he issssss
My ex was always bringing home gay men. Always!!!
Yup
My narc partner was into women and she lied about it whole time and would sneak into with girls when i find out she accused me to be a gay and accused me and played a victim
My ex husband narc alway ask about the anal part and would get mad because i wouldn't go through with it and i ask him why he want to do that and his response was because that what he want to do. I just couldn't do that still after our divorce and we still was home lover friends i still feel uncomfortable try it and didn't he still hate me for that.😮
My X 32yrs. Told me many times about when his mother found his dad's gay porn under the bed.
What was he really telling me?
Ding ding ding! Yup the narc I was with was very much gay and pedophilic as he only hung around young teenage boys online..it was creepy and he would bring up that he thought he was gay when HE was a teen. And when we were together he would spend the entire time with teenage boys online claiming he was “helping” them. He would only put pictures of himself when he was a teenager and dress like a MySpace scene boy…honestly it was gross. Yuck yuck yuck I feel sick thinking about it
Gary
Self-worship.
Makes sense.
My ex was obssessed with soccer players and fitness or bodybuilders. He told me an elderly man asked him for sex for money and even showed me the photo of the guy and also stood in the car drinking. Also said gay men are gross. Also told me two male coworkers asked him to make out with him. Is important to mention he uses drugs