Is the Narcissist Secretly Gay?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2021
- #narcissist #narcissism #hgtudor
You may have had suspicions, you may have found some evidence, but does that mean that the narcissist is secretly gay? Let HG Tudor breakdown this intriguing aspect of the narcissist.
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"Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused" . . .
What a great song. never understood it before but, now it makes sense in reference to a narcissism.
Yup just like the song!
ken ritch ;
I like the song
Yes - this is their Anthem song & Credo :)....he even played it to me several times on repeat ...
Dear God my ex loved that song
you reap what you sow
To ALL reading this: ONCE you realize everything they’ve EVER said was a lie ( I mean a complete freaking lie 🤥.. ) it ALL starts to fall into place. EVERY. LITTLE. THING.
This is very true. I’ve seen a lot of questions where people are saying “well why would they tell me XYZ then go do the opposite. Because EVERYTHING they say is a lie. You can’t take anything they say seriously. When they’re talking you might as well not be listening. Their words have absolutely no substance.
Narcissists are really pales of garbage 🗑.
@@pocahontas4583truths! All lies!
You feel like you aren't standing on solid ground ever. Shifting sand. Ask about the clues...there.s always an excuse. Sadly sometimes deep down you guess but a confidant...having an agenda of their own...potholes your suspicions.
The public school cover.ups need to be viewed here.
It really does!
Narcs have no preferences. They become whatever they need to be for supply.
Or like my narcissistic psycho neighbor, his little companion dog, which he uses as a prop to get supply and bait potential, unsuspecting prey, like little kids, women and young adults alike.
Who can resist a little Chihuahua named Coco? 🥺
They're demons
@@marciloni12
Omg
I know someone who brags his dog is a chick magnet 😂
@@marciloni12 omg! I've known a couple like that... taking their little dogs everywhere. I never thought of it like that but you nailed it!
So true!
After my husband's sudden death at 55 I found out he was bisexual or possibly gay, and a cross dresser. Although after listening to this video I have to wonder if he was fluid. He had also been having multiple affairs, with men and women. I knew none of this when we were married. Also, everything he told me about his life was a lie. Absolutely everything. Getting the full panel of STD testing was the scariest day of my life. Thankfully all was negative. It's been nearly 2 years an I am still stunned and in shock. He was a good liar. That is all I know to be true.
To have someone construct a life based on lies is horrific, not just for that person but for everyone involved with that person. Not living your authentic life due to fear or prejudice creates total chaos.
I am so very sorry. 😢
Wow, I'm so sorry. My heart aches for you, I hope you are doing well...God Bless ❤
Painfull……. Go well
Going through the same exact thing currently. Just wasn’t married to him. Dated for 6 yrs. but just as bad. 😪💔🙏🏼
I honestly suspect the narc i was with is a closet gay.
Mine too.
Hi! Can you elaborate more what were the things your ex did as you suspect he was closet gay?
Oh wow. I kept fighting with this 🤦♀️
I feel the same way about the one I encountered.
It's bizarre. I hadn't seen or spoken to my abusive narc ex in a year, and when I had a court appearance with him by phone because it was in another state, I didn't recognize his voice. I thought i was hearing some gay dude on his legal team and then he started saying "i" and "my", and I kind of started chuckling. It is very fortunate i wasn't in the same room with him. I think my old addiction would have blinded me if I'd seen him or been near him.
It seems natural that a narcissist would be homosexual since they are in love with themselves.
Yes!!!!!!!! This right here, I can understand this so we'll. 🤦🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️
EXACTLY!!!!! 💯
Brilliant point !
Lmao fr.
They’re not “in love with themselves” because if they had self-love, they wouldn’t treat others horribly.
Yes. Any hole will do. My ex of 12 years was always with the boys. Pretend to hate gays. It was all a sham.
Oh my god, “any hole will do” that is so funny🤣
@@ladybird8375 💀
His gay male "friend" picked him up when I finally discarded.
"Any hole will do" LMFAOOO. Jesus. That's the best one I've heard yet.
I think one of my exs were. One would almost cry talking about how much he loved his boyz and wanted to be with them all the time. Another ex would say terrible terrible things about gay men or suspect men he didn’t like were gay, it became too often and I had to get away. I don’t like hate. I can get mad in traffic but I don’t just go on and on. What the hell!
I have always wondered if he was secretly gay- he treats all his women badly but his male friends !!!!
@Louise Miller: OMG! Yesss! I definitely noticed that with mine.
💯
Lmfao yup, they loveeee their male buddies 🤮
I feel the same way about my Narcissist husband he has a lot of male numbers in his phone he gets so excited when he's talking to a man
My narc abused every woman in his life. Hated his own mother and tried to abuse her physically as well. He loves his home boys though.
He used to tell me i remind him of his mother! I thought he loved her! He hated her!!😭😭
@@omgtt8994 My father hated his mother, his wife, and daughters. My ex husband hated his mother I should have ran.
And my goodness at all that mommy roleplay porn!
Hahahahahahahaha! Tacit loyalty to the homeboys!
Sounds like my ex
Yes the Narcissist is Secretly GAY. To my shock I found that out the hard way.
Me too
So did I
Me too
Not all
Same here!
They FREAK OUT & get PISSED if you say are you gay?? That's enough of an answer I guess...😳
Yes mine did. Really got aggressive
Exactly...💯💯
Yes
Ugh yep!!
🤣 the face that they can put on when you adress a question like that :))))
Be careful ladies of gay men who try to use you as narcissistic supply. The most deceiving kind are the ones who aren't effeminate. I actually fell for someone like this having no idea that he was gay. These ppl just need someone to boost their ego, then they move on. There were so many red flags. I'm completely ignoring this person now, but I have to say it was one of the most depressing experiences I've ever had.
I worked with a man who used me as a beard. Always taking me out, invited me to church, out with his family. Acted like a good, Christian man. I found out he had a boyfriend the whole time. He never asked to be intimate. We never kissed either
@@starrjohnson1327 thank God... You're safe.
Effeminate is a mentality as well not just an energy. If he’s repulsed with the idea of taking you on real nice dates, giving a gift or helping you in anyway that benefits you directly & just wants 50/50 everything , he’s effeminate, misogynistic & dangerous. Stay away.
omg im sorry
Would this story have changed if her man payed for absolutely everything she owned , including her car and home? Would that have made him 90% male
The ex narcissist i had definitely swings both ways. He will do anything for admiration and perks. Those are one his many masks 🎭
Sad but true.
Narcissist-ex not ex-narcissist...no such thing as the latter! 😉
Try anything to please community speak truth erica 🎤
@@JJ-iq8mi LOL true
Yes
Wherever he can find his needs met that’s his home! 🙄🙈
True!!
Good so I hope he finds his home..
Exactly
I always said this
You nailed that!! 1,000% true!
Omg this keeps getting sicker and sicker...
Riiiiight!🤦🏿😢 I just wanna go scrub my skin OFF!😡
Thats what i was thinking
DEMONS
Doesn't it though..
They are demons
Unfortunately
Lol!! In my opinion yes. Something is wrong! He hates women..
Exactly!!!
Not the point of being them misogynistic, but they actually hate people, humans. More like being misanthropes in fact.
You’re not wrong
Mine too
Yes they do hate women 👍🏽👍🏽
These types are all over the place. They’re so many of them yet many don’t suspect.
Found out the ex narc was involved with the male neighbor and his cronies. He vehemently denied it, however when he was drunk and I confronted him about it, he admitted what he had done. I was fully disgusted with him and discarded him. Narc free 3 years now.
Great
Prayers for your heart to heal That is horrible 🤬
😂😂😂 love it you discarded your narc I discarded mine too chears to you and wish you all the best Im so glad I've got rid of mine emotionally that is cause I was completely done.. he's still hovering and ghosting though here and there a message or visit pops up.. Im in zero contact and my door is constantly closed
I always thought he was but not sure....
Congratulations
Flee! Escape! You have no need for the narcissist. Obsessing about what the narc is or isn’t, serves no purpose after a point. It’s like trying to chase the wind. Define and discover yourself. Then the narc no longer exists.
Thank you
That's a good one! I hope the define and discover comes soon!
Well said!
Ohhhh yesssss 👏👏👏
Omg that’s the best advice ever
He gets married to hide his secret- so no one will suspect he's gay.
I really think that’s what mine did
Interesting 🤔
😵😭😭
Yup, I think that's what mine did too.
Facts
I’ve been dealing with narcissists literally my entire life. I can confirm that this is absolutely true 🎯💯
Yep! & I agree with you.
I'm so tired of it.
I was raised by both empath and narcissist each one at far ends of the spectrum I know how the game is played when I know what I'm dealing with I know how to level the playing field how to turn the tables I'm extremely empathetic but in retaliation I have unfortunately completely totally over-the-top went narcissistic on one narcissist in particular in my life have I set out to completely destroy someone strategically consistently with persistence if I describe in full details how I did it TH-cam will delete my account again I'm a true empath but everyone has narcissistic blood sometimes it takes a certain type person to bring it out in you anybody can be evil it takes a lot out of you always keep in mind Karma doesn't come around it's always there I lost absolutely all empathy for her then I gained it back but it's a little too late she wasted my time broke my heart I just bruised her ego tarnished her reputation extremely successfully if I don't say so myself her Bad Karma kicked in Full Throttle now she has 7 and a half more years to do nothing but think about me the last guy that got over on her the beat her at her own game brutally now that I have a better understanding of the disorder in their perspective I can't really seem to care I regret it but can't take it back I'll be heartbroken forever she'll be angry forever and that's that life is just people doing things
@@kimclasing5664 I'm surrounded by them I hate to throw the word around there's personality traits and there's full-blown botard disorders the problem is they keep sucking me into their bulshit when I have nothing to do with them and I wasn't there I do not care and I'm getting very angry been posting some videos could be somewhat taunting but I can care less I feel that I'm performing a public service the knowledge is out there if people are too closed-minded stupid ignorant or lazy to pass up learning something that would be their fault narcissism should be a class taught in school elementary through graduation
@@ryanreagan6073 I wish I had your courage
I believe this, sexually fluid but deep in the closet about homosexuality.
Exactly especially if they are older raised in church & conservative job Very Caitlin Jenner 🤬
@@lovewhitey2027 : He was nice looking when younger.And UGLY as CJ.BUT told Ex Wife he had completed the transgender.Then gets an 18 yr old Man.To switch and be "Sophia".
You be SURPRISED how many HW stars are Trans.
Deeppppp
#joshuathomasbaker
Then it touches you and you don't know where it's been.
Exactly!...when I found out what I did - I went straight to get tested.
🤢🤭🤮 who or what? They have no self respect because they have no self identity! They will crawl around on all fours and bark like a dog if they think it will get them their fuel! It is really sad and pathetic when I think about it. Narcs are so broken inside and dangerous because of it!
Eww. Lol. But you're right.
😂😂😂
🤢🤢🤮
I didn’t know what narcissist meant but I found it trying to find out if my mean ass boyfriend was gay! Ha, imagine.... literally looked up why is my boyfriend so mean, led to gay led to narcissist and here we are!
Welcome!
Eye opening! 👁
Makes perfect sense.
My ex was mean too. He'll remain blocked. Certain things about him were feminine...he didn't like holding heavy bags, he had an attitude, he layed in bed in a girly way one time and when he was drunk he said he'll walk up to guys with a dress on😳😒 he's 🗑 I'm SO GLAD I got rid of him
Wow!
I caught my mom having sex with my reading teacher who was female when I was in eighth grade. What made it even worse was that my mother taught at the same school. She then told everyone at school what a terrible child I was not to be trusted. She was a well respected teacher and all her peers believed everything she was saying about me. It was so hard going to school every day having to see my mother and having to go to my reading class to be taught by her lover. There were two coworkers that had been friends of my mom since I was little, they called me into the teachers lounge, sat me down and started asking me questions about what was going on with my mom and my teacher. I did not say one word and could not look at either one of them. The sad thing is, neither one of them asked if I needed any help. I was afraid be cause the morning after I caught my mom and female teacher having sex ( in our backyard) my mom sat me down and told me if I made up any stories about her, she would send me away. That was the beginning of my hell. I was on my own, and yes, my mother sent me away to my father and stepmother who did not want me either. My mom told them all these lies about me and I was not treated very well. The story goes and on but to this day had I not forced my mom to admit she is gay, she would never give come clean on her own. And there are very few people that know she is gay. She has also denied that we had a conversation the morning after about keeping her secret. Story goes on and on but I've said enough for now. I just want to say I have never gotten an apology from my mom for telling lies about me so i look like the problem, and to this day will still lie about me so I look like the problem child just in case I decide to tell someone she is a lesbian. Man, what a crappy person she has been to me.
That's horrible, sorry that happened to you. It sounds like the teachers suspected something was very wrong at home, but either didn't know the right questions to ask or fearful of your mom, a colleague. In any case they failed you too.
I am so sorry this happened to you as a child. Remember that wounded innocent little girl who still lives within and always treat her with kindness and help her find joy in life.
I'm so sorry. That is a crazy sad story.
😔😥 I’m so sorry you had to experience that
The world is so unkind to children. Sorry for your suffering.
This was a question I often asked myself. WOW
Same
Me too!!!!
Me too.
Absolutely
Yes I thought that my narc was gay. Wow I was surprised to see this title.
I exposed the secret they ain't hiding shit from a empath they succubus !!
Facts!
It’s true. Found my ex with gay porn. I think it’s mostly the fact he believes he’s entitled to everything and everyone.
@TheFatCat's Daughter that’s one thing. Did you notice that because in the start of the relationship they are so into you and it just dies off? I think it’s quite easy to detect it in the first date if you just do the “extremes test “. Some girls I know cut the guy off instantly at the slightest implication that he might be gay.
I have heard a narcissist say people and sexuality are "just things". There's your answer!
🎯 Ever wonder why some just don't get it ?
People tell you who they are Always 🗣✍🏻🤬
My father🙈
That's an excuse they use when they've cheated on you. They will tell you that it was "just sex"! They still love you!
Awww...
🤮🤮🤮🤮
Yea pay attention to the sex life n what their into
I suspect my narcissist is on the downlow
I did and I was right. Gut is everything with these demons
Mee too
Why do you have one?
@@scarletoharabia3801 I’m sure I’m right too but I wish I had some damn proof
@@nothingevenmatters771 1 word.Camera.They so small the camera.Video/audio
I was making this point to my family. To someone who sees sex as power, it’s about acquiring that power. It’s not sexual at all. Hence, the power seeker will sleep with anyone who provides it.
They leave no stone unturned. For people with no depth they sure have a lot of layers
🏆
Well spoke.
They need to go extinct.
So true
This is so true. The ones I've known have been attracted to both sexes But they hid it. They were also attracted to youth absolutely
Who isn't attracted to youth?
Same.
That very true 😩. My first one was a porn addict it was embarrassing . My last one pretend to be muslim but worked a security agent in gay club though damn.
@@msdemeanour wtf?
Sick shit
Very toxic, feel badly for the narcs victims. They should be wearing ankle bracelets.
True to the fullest extent & I was thinking it but you beat me saying it😂
Omg yes!!!!!
The comments on this video make me sad. We've all been abused by similar assholes. Wishing everyone a more positive and healthy future without their narc abuser ♡
I was reading all the comments too and was feeling bad for a lot of them, because I could relate on so many levels, and no one deserves that.
So glad I am free, and, free, indeed. Here's to hoping that a "normal" appears one day. Cheers.
I’m married to a kind, honest, faithful, smart, fun, loving man now! It only took 40 years lol
@@Su_aSponte That's great and it might happen for me too! I'm in my 60s now and I'm not even looking though, so I better get moving. 😆
The same narc gets dozens of people in their life to ruin.
20 narcs is 500+ victims
Even if they only have 5 victims in their life thats 100 victims for 20 narcs.
I dated a covert narcissist some years back and I was convinced he was gay. I don't want to stereotype but he had a way about him. Even his mum had confronted him and his high school friends. I did some snooping and saw he used to look at hookers but these were extremely young-looking. Most likely were likely legal. He was a serial dater and wanted a wife and children so bad. I honestly was convinced it was an act to portray his heterosexuality.
After years of my narc husband's abuse, I asked him one day, "If I'm so awful, why did you marry me"? His reply? "Because I didn't want my friends and family to think I'm gay". What a helmet.
I asked mine the same thing. He never answered me
I’m sorry for what you were put through, read my Lengthy comment or “book” I’m with ya!!
What a helmet baahaaaa 🤪🤣🤣🤣
Wendy B That's extremely sad and it seems like he's your ex-husband now, which is a huge relief. ❤
sounds like my ex narc of 14 years-they are retarded
How very sad!
I never questioned any man I was ever with before I met my narc. I often asked him if he was sure he wasn't gay. He told me once he let a guy go down on him. The way he told the story, he liked it
Mine told me about a trans who he said he didn't know until after...this was close to the discard n he was drunk. I think that was his way of trying to apologize to me without apologizing. N he tested me too....to see what I was willing to do ...ask me to do a massage in ass area. He said he was in pain n I better not tell. Well the way he did that n was seeing if I would make a move without him asking. So that clued me in ...he wanted me to see ...
My Narc trys to get me to go down on him but I refuse to
Once the narc I was with told me that while he was sleeping his gay friend went down on him while he was asleep. And than when he woke up he told him not to ever do it again,... and that was all.
I tjought something ain't quiet right, any straight man would have gone balistic, and I even doubt that story will be known .
I had to sip my tea 🍵🍵 for this one!!!
OKAAAAY!!!
😂😂😂😂😂
Lol! Yup.
Tequila for me 🏡🤔
😂😂😭😭😭😭💯🤦🏻♀️ lord same i had to smoke a blunt for this one
I’m sure, they will do anything to replenish fuel.
yep!
I suspected this all along. After I left the narc he told me he preferred being with his friends to me 😂 yeh I see you ! He was so beta too and would sit next to his friend instead of me everywhere.
Same here-narc wanted to hang with his side dude!! Still thinks no one knows he’s on the down low. It’s obvious!
The side dude is nearly 60 and has never been interested in women. He pretended to be years ago but it was a lie, false front to hide his true self.
Now the narc and side dude supply go on vacations together and post their happy photos. There on vacation together without the narcs wife.
Yup mine too every time i turnt around I would say ask him was he busy he say yea a lil sum I'm talking to my boy or hold on let me holla at my boy. right quick or me and my boy bout to handle something 🙄 Or his boy at the door !!
My ex behaved the same way.😳
@Serena Williams
Wow
Oh goodness lol xx reading through these comments! I had inklings also within regards to my ex! Xxx he was always with his so called ‘lads’ and one in particular! They also used to constantly ask me for threesomes(I never did and never would) I had to keep telling them no, I find that vile and as if your asking your girlfriend to do that with your male friend aswell! My answer would be they have both done it together before! Used to make me feel so uncomfortable when ever they would bring that up! Xx he also used to constantly stay at his house and I would be waiting for him to come home all night- he would return the next day from his boys house! Xx thank god it’s over! The whole relationship was hell x
Five months later and I am still recovering. And I never even gave him my body or told him where I live. Imagine if I had, I'd still be dealing with his foolishness!! The constant harassing phone calls talking about "I love you," when we just met three weeks ago was enough for me!
Totally off subject but when I first divorced the narc and started learning about NOD and codependency I could not listen to this channel because your voice and message literally scared me. So I learned from other channels. Years later, I click on your channel today and I can listen just fine😀 I have come a long way in my healing! And I have no narcs in my life so Praise God♥️🙏
Welcome!
It takes time to to process things, and we go through stages of enlarging our understanding.
Same here !
I’m also at the stage you were to begin with, I cannot listen to these vids very well, it’s upsetting to think you/ me put up with an unknown sour relationship for so long in ignorance.
Some of the videos are upsetting to me too. I have to take breaks. That’s why the mm and ph ones are a nice break in the viewing. They are like little entertaining bits while also learning. But the teaching ones like this can trigger Traumatic stress. The narc that I know is very homophobic which I thought was judgemental. But it could have been he was secretly gay.
Mine once asked me, ‘what is I said I was Bi?’ And three years later he still claims he was kidding.
Mine told me he was bi after I found 97 gay screenshots on his phone.... then he said he wasn’t .... very weird ... he would hate people to know what goes on ... he hides behind a facade of heterosexuality.... he was. constantly in the toilet with his I pad on his gay websites 🙄🙄... till all hours ... very sad really for all concerned
Mine asked me on more than one occasion what I would do if he started going to gay bars
He first told me it was once in college his first lol 😂 then months later he told it was longer relationship but that him and his homosexual friend dated women too lol 😂 just before I left him some of his kin folks by marriage told me they thought him gay
He was waiting for your reaction 🤬
Mine asked me that same thing! And when I played along and said well I guess that would just be a fact and he said yeah I'm bi, I like both. But then after that he continued to say it was a joke. That was one of the only truths he ever told me that he is bi and would be gay but finds it too fun to use women as a cover and get away with having affairs with men like his business partner when the world thinks he and his partner are very hetero guys. Sickening
Yes they hang out with their buddies and there is always one that they hang out the most. No time for us just their special friend. Mine has never really shown much affection with me at all, in over 30 yrs of marriage. And if he has it’s like he was forcing himself to do so. I think they are all closeted homosexuals.
Of course You Gut is never wrong 🤬
Yep. All of them are closeted
I swearrr. Even though he was kind of my boyfriend, not actually married to me, that was LITERALLY the same exact situation with me... what the actual fuck!!!!!!
They'll do anything for nothing other than the thrill of it & "thinking" they were getting away with something, or over on somebody. They can be the most vile, despicable creatures. Then turn right around & (pretend) to be completely innocent ( as if it never happened) & be the best person in the world. Only to go right back to being despicable again. It's a viscous cycle with them.
🙏
To a 🍵.
A sad, pathetic life.
Exactly 💯
If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it's a duck.
Trust you me he quacks just like a duck acts like a duck and walks like a duck
This is one of the best narc videos I’ve ever come across because I’ve never seen this topic addressed so thoroughly and this really brought clarity to my experience with a narc. I didn’t understand but now I do.
My narc dad turned out to be gay! Used my mom and us kids as a beard for a good 20 yrs! He was an alcoholic and worked as a preacher bc, you know, who would suspect the preacher to be on the DL 🤷♀️
Very common
This was my ex husband as well. 😒
Similar. Alcoholic dad and got caught after 5 years of molesting young boys. I'm 51 and FINALLY getting some answers to my lifelong confusion. One year post covert narcissist boyfriend breakup and the pieces are slowly falling in to place. I wondered if he was secretly gay also...moving towards truly loving myself and leaving all this stuff in the past with no more attachment to it. Hope I get there soon as well as all others who have suffered these horrible experiences too.
He talked about a transgender female that came into his job one day. He kept emphasizing that he couldn’t tell that she was a man cause she had breast implants and other surgery to be more feminine. He joked about another coworker not knowing she was born a man and him wanting her number. He talked about it for hours. A year later he talked about the same transgender woman and kept saying he doesn’t understand how a person wouldn’t know it was a man. Looking back, he was very intrigued talking about it. I think he secretly likes transgender women. He abuses women and treats them like shit and says women are bitches and are made to cater to men. After seeing this video...yeah he’s definitely a closet gay.
Yes when I date the ex narc he was talking about how he once was sitting with a women but it was a male and he couldn't see ..they was touching each other but he would see my face and stopped the conversastion I was like how did you not tell .. but he kept going on about how you couldn't tell bla die bla I look back now i think they slept together and he's gay
I think any hole will do fits his type.
A transgender woman is a woman and to think otherwise is transphobic
Did he ever come out the closet?
My narc husband has spent all of my money, our money, our retirement money, daughter's college money, everything to pay trans prositutes...he was probably doing gay men in general as well.
"We can be carefree because we don't care" "Go at it like a shit house door in the wind"
The stuff you say cracks me up!
Entertaining education.
😂😂😂😂😂
Laurie, it is my 1st time listening to his content , in my feed. He caught me off guard with "a dog w/6 dix" 😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Love that statement too Laughed like crazy when I heard it0
So They Are Secretly Gay!
😫😫😫😫
Yes
LOL
I wouldn't say that. They just like sticking their wee wee in any hole. The sex of the person doesn't factor in.
@@myprivacy998 sooo, gay?
H.G. Im soooooo glad you went there! This is fn GOLD! I'm gonna listen 6 more times and then I'm scheduling a consultation.
You are welcome. I look forward to giving you bespoke insight through consultation.
@@hgtudor-theultra i think i will need that to very soon...what should i know before consulting , there so much to ask for, in order to be most prepared?
@@refaelarachmani3416 get your money out
MAKE NOTES. Times, dates, situations, anything. This will help you develop a timeline, and defer the 'gaslighting' when it comes around.
Holy sh*t! This makes so much sense, albeit painful. I'm still trying to process the information but I wanted to extend my gratitude to the creator of this video for shining a light on a very dark topic that many partners are too uncomfortable or ashamed to bring up.
The signs were all there plain as day when I was with my abusive ex boyfriend. I just thought he was really open minded and dynamic. His closest friends were all gay or bisexual body builders. He treated me horribly during the 3 years we were together but painted a picture in public and online like we were the perfect couple -that was really important to him. He tried to kill me when I left him. 3 years after being away from him I come across a whole collection of homoerotic photography & videos of him on the internet as well as a secret life he had of “gay fantasy wrestling” - countless videos of him battling hardbodied men, both of them dressed in speedos 😂
I wondered for a long time if the male narcissist I was involved with was secretly gay. They have no preference either way, supply is supply and they mold themselves accordingly.
This sexual description fits my ex-husband to a Tee. There was NO form of deviant sexual behavior that he did not have an interest in.
as feminine gay guy, my ex narc used his fluid sexuality as a weapon in some ways, sometimes he was gay, sometimes he was unsure and very insecure about his masculinity, he disliked transpeople yet dated them more than any other. I don't for one minute believe he ever really cared who it was, as long as there was fuel it was fair game. I truly think lgbtq+ people are at a great risk of attracting narcs because of the shame and low self esteem which is rife in the community.
I think they do it to fuel insecurity in us. Im hyper feminine and female and my ex narc would seek out masculinity but now that i gray rock him completely he is back to attacking hyper femininity.
Its just whatever you're not that they become obsessed with flaunting
I believe you are right.
Unfortunately, with the pall of secrecy that still stifles most homosexual men from being their authentic selves, the gay scene is a narcissist's happy hunting ground. And I say that as a gay man, also.
You’re 💯 % correct -
Many of the straight ones are 'gay for pay'. This is the video that brought me here.
He is not gay or even bisexual....he's just really really friendly !
But of course!
Sure
Classic!
Agreed ✨🍷💌🙏😎
HA! 🤣
Sex to a narcissist is like duct tape is to the rest of us....a tool to be used in any necessary situation.
The narcissist is like a tub of office margarine... spread around, very thinly!!! I honestly think he had been with the majority of people in his workplace! And always homed in on the unsuspecting newbies.
@@user-jz3ow1do2b agreed ✍🏻🤬
I always wondered about my ex narc..he was always hangin with his boys or a one particular freind all the time ..an neglecting me..
Sheila you must have been dating my guy. Lol! My guy always hung more with the guys...one in particular. One nite as I was getting out of the shower, I heard him on the phone with his 'friend'. They had been best buds since they were young but what I heard when the phone conversation concluded was "I LOVE you". Don't you, when your hanging up the phone, tell ur friends "love you" No more, no less. Then the reply was "I love you too!"... not even 'lov you too bud'. He never expressed love like that to me. Then when I saw the 2 in a frontal embrace, that was it. I guess I'm glad my ex narkky bf moved away after retirement. Yes. Thats rite.... out of state, down the street from his special friend! It used to be 3 hours a nite. the 2 of them on the phone with one another.. minimum 3 hours! I am so glad he's out of my life. I was miserable with him! I really think he was gay. 4 marriages, 3 serious relationships. They all failed. It was told to me all women left bc of his 'special friend's. Like btothers?? No way. They were gay. They lasted 60 years.
Wow Glad to know I’m not the only person to Experience someone hangout with the buddies all the time.
So true
Mine too always worried about other guys and neglected me and hates women
He always talked about other men trying to pick him up
Yes, on point HG. I do believe this. I’ve often wondered myself about "preference” but, I believe It’s more likely wherever they get their needs met but, in that particular moment in time, they’re craving a certain something that they can get from one of their sources. Kinda like when you crave something to eat. Whether it’s Italian, Japanese, Mexican, Soul food, it’s what they want then and there.. The Somatic I dealt with was this way.
For years, I suspected he was gay. When I brought it up, he became angrily defensive and said I was bullying him. Then one night, while we were out with his friends, one of his gay friends said something sexual (can't remember what it was), he took the opportunity to suddenly say, openly, "I can go both ways." Everyone looked at me like 'did you know?' and I was just stunned. To this day, if I bring up that night, he vehemently denies that it happened, and none of the people from that night communicate with him anymore (for various reasons).
This is how my ex is. Anytime I’d bring up anything questionable he said or did in the past he’d completely deny it ever happened and tell me I’m basically hallucinating.
I’ve always wondered if my husband was secretly gay. I only recently realized he was a narcissist, and I have to say... I think this idea of preserving the facade describes him perfectly. No fixed sexuality, and definitely the potential to be gay.
I asked mine if he was actually gay... Despite his voracious history with women, I wondered if he was actually gay. This video explains a lot!
Womanising is cover! They hop from women to women quickly before they get caught. There is always a smart woman who susses them out eventually
I had to edit my comment on this matter. Some are and some are not. But I'm pretty sure most are
Agreed . . . .
Mine would always joke about being gay and has used the statement “I’m gay” against me in arguments whenever his control was threatened. He’s even tried to triangulate me with other guys so I’d get jealous and has blatantly asked me why I thought gay guys were attracted to him. So obvious.
Mine would joke about being gay too
I did ask myself this. he did behave as if he was.
Narcissists are from all sexual backgrounds (remember they are fluid) and it doesn't matter if they are young or old, so long as they are weak and have supply. I also believe, that as they feed on supply we empaths have to also feed on education in an effort to keeping our guards up and staying aware.
In essence, we are mere appliances to your kind. Thank you for another educational and entertaining lesson, HG!
My ex narc hated with passion gay people, I don’t but as this individual lied in everything he said I do doubt he hated them but rather be one or is one secretly. He did say his only friend like touch and pinch his ass! Well who cares now I am out!!
This is true. I had a friend who identified as lesbian and her older brother would give her hell for dating women. Come to find out he was sexting photos of his private region to transexuals and other men from off craigslist. He was also meeting up w them for trysts. The unfortunate part was he also had a GF.
When they protest too much that's the sign that they're covering and they are gay
@@caramelfox4807 : Wow...
@@elizabethtyler8929 : Yes I agree.... because why be SO dramatic about it?
Reverse Psychology . . .
I think some of the narcs should just come out of closet already and stop pretending, there is no need to hide what they really are
True, but the never will. It's the deep rooted shame...
They know how to go undetected...
If they come out, they ruin their facade. 'People will judge' It puts them in a position they cant control
I think that’s the real root of the problem.
My brother is a narcissist and I suspected this was the case, getting what he wants by using people, whatever their gender. This makes total sense!
He is obsessed with sex and often used to ask me about my own sex life and telling me to hurry up and have babies (he only stopped when I moved abroad and lessened contact and now I'm kind of past child-bearing age). He even brought a friend to the house as a 'gift' a few years ago for me to sleep with. I didn't accept the 'gift'.😂 Thanks for shedding light on this HG!
The narcissist is a social chameleon and will be with anyone willing to feed their ego!
My narcissist confessed he was sexually molested by a family friend/priest. He said the priest brought him and 2 teenage buddies camping several times would get them drunk and encourage sex between them all. I asked him how it felt and he didn’t seem to act upset about it. He said it felt okay. He also told me he stayed at a gay campground as an adult but didn’t say he was active with anyone. He’s always had women in his life. Hmmmm.This is interesting.
Twisted, wired wrong imposters!
Yes
Please make more of these videos woman really need to know the truth...
Agreed! I'm so glad this stuff is finally coming out.
Exposing this ended the game
'Shit house door in the wind'! 😂😂 Brilliant....
Indeed I am.
@@hgtudor-theultra 😂😂😂
@@hgtudor-theultra your such a narcissist 😂
@cat wo - indeed, I have never been anything other than clear about that.
@@hgtudor-theultra Your honesty is refreshing, enlightening, educational and humorous and I appreciate you for that. Also thankful for You Tube and your platform and services where you are able to assist people, otherwise this information would stay under the cloak of darkness and we need shine the spot lights on this. Perhaps with more awareness and education we are not only able to help ourselves but also the people directly effected by it and by that I mean you and other people like you. We are all human after all. Now enough of blowing smoke up your arse....
The dude spun me a story about being kissed by a man in the bathroom at a bar and how amazing it was 2 weeks before he broke up with me. I was like "good for you" because he always told me he was bi, and I was always under the assumption that our relationship was poly. After me, he immediately got into a relationship with another woman. To this day, I still don't know if it was all just a lie to get me jealous, and when I didn't react the way he wanted, he discarded me? I kind of feel like, if he actually had a man who was so interested in him, he could have just gotten with him? Why latch onto some girl that I never got any indication he liked? Idk man, it's all just the behavior of an utterly non-genuine person.
These types put you at major risk of STDS. You dodged a bullet.
the Narcissist was already seeing other people while he was with you and before you. It just looked like he instantly got what another person.
The narc is more then a utterly non genuine person. He's a dangerous predator, manipulator, lier, often times - addicts, users , abusers, will go to all lengths to get there sexual desires and fantasies met . Alot of narcs have many addictions .... Including sexual addiction. What they do to there victims is soul rape. Takes a long time to heal. Look up Abandonment and Betrayal Trauma. Wishing all survivors Happy Healing for 2024!! First time you see the red flags ..... Run or other wise the . Trauma bonding gets even harder to get out of the pit of hell. Pray.
the same exact thing happened to me. the first thing that set me off was that he had a high pitched voice and a low voice, but i often found him choosing the high pitched voice a lot more often..he was always professing love but one night he accused me of flirting w/ a man at a bar and he tried to dump me and blame this issue on me when i did not do anything. he never had respect and still has no.respect. funny also he didnt remove himself from my youtube account. he has a lot of single male gay friends and has a past that he wouldnt introduce to me.
Who kno s it’s above my pay grade . The Narc I knew has a hatred of women. Hence the constant sabotage
I always suspected this was this case for him...no judgement, just confirmation of my instincts.
Same...
Me too!!
Odd correlation. The narcissist that I was involved with. Intimately. Was asexual. Mirrors , videos . And really just used others to experience themselves.
"Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused" . . . .
@@kenritch3941 Every breath you take, every move you make, every bond you break, every game you fake, I'll be watching you.
Interesting
Found out he had 2 Barbie dolls that he would have conversations with and put them on his front and back privates to get off while dressed as a woman (he looked ridiculous with all his fat hanging out and would never "pass". Disgusting. I researched for several years to figure out how such a sickness could be acquired by a male (in my cast). What a total waste of my time and my energy. Had I seen this video even 2 years ago I would have gone no contact then. Finally did 2 weeks ago and I have absolutely no doubts about my decision. Thank You HG. Better late than never.
An empath is also a chameleon..but yet they care so much. That is exactly why they are attracted to each other to such an agree..they are literally the complete opposite or mirror of each other.
This about the narcissist and empath are right. This mirror affect is known as twin flames
Empaths are like narcissists but more narcissistic
@Scrooge McGruel interesting analysis 🧐 I would love the article or video to watch is it Sam Vatkins??
Stop deluding yourself; there is no such thing as "empath" you are either a borderline or a co-dependent. Stop aggrandizing your personality disorder; that's what narcissist do
@@notallabouttarot5194 there is no such thing as an " empath" ; the narc is drawn to borderlines and co-dependents because they are have no sense of self, no boundaries and they believe they deserve to be treated like garbage. This is perfect for the narc because he needs to abuse and debase his "partner" in order to re-enact his childhood trauma with his " dead" mother/mother as bad object. He needs to kill her because he himself is dead. A narc cannot be with a healthy normal person. Stop glamorizing this highly dysfunctional and sick danse macabre and get yourself into a treatment program.
Nah, Narssassim is caused by fear, fear of ones sexuality is just one form of fear that creates them. All fear if undealt with, trauma, can lead to narcissism.
Childhood trama creates the narc
Long story short, either way you want to try to jazz it up the answer is YES! I knew it 😂
My opinion, a BIG YES!
My EX hate... women ...but he wants👦 ...He wants to hide all secrects ...I know he likes men ( THEY hate women (mummy or daddy issue)but act different ...They only use women )...If you want to understand this disorder(toxic👿😈👹...😱) you have to experience life with this toxic BEAST 👿😈👹...😱 ...GOD BLESS YOU 🕊💖👼🙇
True
Facts
When we had sex it was only one time and that was it !! Our sex was bad for some reason I use to ask myself was this man gay they way he act and move 🤦🏽♀️ I’m scared he won’t be able to hide it nomore it’s even in his voice now sometimes when u listen to him he sounds kind of gay even the way he walks it’s funny
My guy was a big 6'3 firefighter. But strange female voice
Walk switched up constantly I found that strange
What goes on in the dark will eventually come to the light,
Get yourself out. Go to an attorney now. One month, we were doing "ok", moving toward the future. The following month I was presented with divorce papers, itemizing everything he was taking in the divorce. Things so SPECIFIC as to include personalized Christmas tree ornaments!! He shopped me out like WalMart, before I knew what hit me.
He walks funny because he has something up his ass.
I have been waiting for this video!
To be honest, I think we know the answer to this. I don’t know if you’re just kinky or you love a challenge, but sis we be knowing this && we still trap our hearts in some crap.
🌹*trust yo self*
🌹*love yo self*
🌹*stop thinking you can save && change a Narc*
I’m talking to me but heyyyyy feel free to adhere to the same advice.
P.s. You are amazing. You are loved. && you deserve love....the real kind. Not that shit that makes your OVERqualified ass feel like your unworthy for somebody’s fat head, lying && conniving, no good son! 🌹👑
The things you wish for in a partner should be qualities you possess INSIDE!
Preach🙌🏾
Yes hangs around all guys most married to doormat
Exactly
Ok. I haven't listened to this yet....just the into. Now that I know it does refer to Homosexuality...I'd have to say YES! I always thought he was favouring the male species. HIS homophobia was expressed loudly and with such indignance, hate.. I interpreted it as fear...fear he may prefer men. When we were intimate, I always felt he was making love to himself.. I thought he treated Men nicer, more respectful than any Woman. So, in a few hours, I will listen to this video. I can't wait!
Same here
My exact experience as well - I suspected this early on when he quit responding and didn’t want sex - I just quit trying
Wow. Making love to himself! My ex... we had a mirror along side the bed... and I would always catch him watching HIMSELF while we were having sex. I mean biting his bottom lip, flipping his hair... getting into watching himself. He was great looking but I was far from impressed otherwise so I don't know what he was so proud of. Lol. Now I get it. I always wondered about that. Makes perfect sense now.
@@theshadylady1982 omg mine too.he would stare at himself so long the movement stopped. i used to open my eyes like what the hell?
Sex is an evaluation of their own performance. Mine would always ask if his penis was bigger than my ex’s. If he hate me out better than other guys.
I thought the narc was gay but he was just a misogynist.
Wow! 😱😱😱
These two things usually go together.
Supports my long-held suspicions.
This made me lol. I always teased that he was gay.
Me to😅😅😅😅
Me tooo!!!!!!!
Same lol
He used more hairspray in a week than I used in 5 years. And that's not a hyperbole.
OMG!!! This explains so much!!! Thank you!