Funny Things To Say Right Before Anesthesia Kicks In (Reddit Stories r/AskReddit)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 มิ.ย. 2019
- New AskReddit Stories: What would be a funny thing to say to a surgeon before anesthesia kicks in 5 seconds later? 💯💸
🔥 2nd channel with exclusive reddit stories: / @updooteverything
#doctor #funny #anesthesia
Music: Kevin MacLeod
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My friend (male) told his surgeon (male)
“You’re the first guy to ever go inside me. Be gentle”
Im WHESING
Holy frock you blow my comment up from me spelling something wrong thanks guys
😂
🤣🤣😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣😆😆
Lmao
jon doe I’m also whesing
Doctor- “count backward from ten”
Me- “I hate math”
And then I was out
@Oddysea Cat Not anymore
*anestesia kicks in*
"Mr. Stark, i don't feel so gud"
*_FALLS ASLEP_*
Maya J 😂😂
My dad had this simple challenge as well, the thing is he only counted 1 physically but counted close to 10 mentally
H
My dad went out saying “mcdonalds” and then woke up saying “hmm tasty”
not gonna lie dis is the most funniest comment ive ever read i just dont know why.
tell ur dad i like the commitment to that joke
XD
LOL
Lmao
@the Emperor of man I agree
1:20 "Righty tighty, Lefty loosey"
**Dies**
Polish Filipino that’s how they put the coffin on with the drill.
Drewbee LOL
Had a doctor named Dr Slaughter. When i met him said "that better not be a nickname earned while working here."
That's. That is SUCH an unfortunate name for a doctor hahahaha
Doc: It is a nickname i got here while working, not important, from my previous job in a slaughterhouse
The guy was weird too. I was about 19 y/o at the time. He kept bringing up big hero six and how he had a cameo in it. I hadn't seen it before and even told him that. But still he kept bringing it up and laughing to himself about apearing in a movie.
I later watched it to find out the moment he was referring to was when the stoner college kid was showing off his comics.
... ironic cause where I grew up there's a scarehouse called Dr Slaughter's house of terror
I had a dentist whose name translates to "butcher"...
Once i woke up during anesthesia and asked “you done yet?” And the dentist said “no that was just the novocaine injection, go back to sleep” I said aight and went back under
If you woke up, sue them.
Wtf, yall go under anesthesia at the dentist?
@@nilsapriem3641 lmao i wish
nilsa priem only for wisdom teeth removal
@@fridapajon2931 I was awake when they removed my wisdom teeth
Doc: “You should feel slee..”
Me: “MY POOP IS COMING!!”
Doc:
King P nice
*k*
XD I UNDERSTAND YOUR VINE REFERENCE!!!! XD HAHAHA
“Y’all also see that man in the dark suit in the corne-“ *black out*
IM DEFINITELY USING THIS ONE NEXT TIME.
Mason R YES
Imagine saying that and then dying
Peppa Jeff • 13 years ago hsisiwjhidpepprirnporneidud
Better : who’s that instead of y’all also see
Surgeon: "this is the stuff that killed Michael Jackson"
My brain: He He
hee-hee
heee-heee
@@botelladeaguamediollena4885 HEEEEEE HEEEEEE
*-huuuu-huuu-*
*HHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-HHHHHEEEEEEEE*
“Okay I’m going to need you to count backwards from 10”
“You want fries with that?”
*blacks out*
I just snorted with laughter, and I’m doing that next time I get surgery
The fact that it doesn't make any sense just makes me laugh so much 😂
This doesn't make any sense so why tf am I laughing!? 😂😂
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Sure i'd like some Arbys curly fries.
I said, “This burns” and he said “It’s not supposed to do that” and the world went dark
Were you put out with IV or the mask?? If IV, i'm like 99% sure I know what they gave you
Parker Phillips yeah it was IV
@@kate7yn334 I'm pretty sure what they gave you was Propofol. I've had it many times when I needed to be put out, and if the vein is close to the surface, it really really burns. If it burned, it's really likely that you had the IV in your hand or in your wrist. If a vein in the inside of your elbow is relatively close to the surface, it can also burn if that's where you had it.
Parker Phillips thank you
@@mr.terwilliger5728 Hahahah, why am I being thanked??
Bot: “His blood pressure is a little high.”
Me: “That’s not the only thing that’s high.”
*o o o o h*
Cool, sentient robot surgery!
Imagine making such a funny joke that the doctor cant stop laughing and stabs you in the lung by accident.
cocaine cola wow calm down 🤣
I spat out my milk. 😂
oh god
Ne
Noice
As the surgeon say: "It's time to start harvesting while they're fresh."
Nice to meet you, I am Pi
@@alexwang982 Hi Pi im dad
@@AverageAlien hi dad I'm mom
Username checks out.
Average Alien hi dad, I’m your girlfriend
I remember looking at the nurse and saying, “man these drugs ain’t shit” and immediately blacking out after while she laughed at me.
very believable my guy
Nice one, Donald.
Straight up I asked a nurse out before my wisdom tooth operation and her number was in my pants pocket that night when I took my wallet and keys out. Together almost a year now :D
Damn son. Preach me, your new disciple.
Wholesome
congagutians
OMG. Write it up, sell it as a rom-com! Happy for you!
Mr. Terwilliger I’m speechless
As a surgeon, say: so, *_how_* do I extract the heart?
Uhhhhhh, i was supposed to (insert wrong thing here) amputate his/her legs, right?
"Siri, the patient has a leak, what should I do?"
I am a doc too during my residency my my senior doc had a patient (M 23 who broke femur into 3 and was a son of one of another doc) to whom he said lets play the DVD to know how to repair the Femur just before the Anaesthetic kicked in.
And that’s how the medic lost his license
a good way to get sued for malpractice
My doctor told me that the anesthetic tasted like bubble gum. The last thing I remember doing was licking the inside of the mask like a moron.
Everything_Nerdy well, what did it taste like?
He lied. It didn’t taste like anything
Everything_Nerdy well that’s disappointing. *lies.*
@@everything_nerdy3562
Reality is often dissapointment
LOL I HAD ONE OF THOSE- THEY SMELL REALLY GOOD
Taste? Also nothing
Anesthesiologist: count down from 5
Me: okay *counts in head*
Anesthesiologist: no outloud
Me: five... *passes out*
if I for some reason get a surgery, I'm going to say "Anyone want to ask god a question?"
im gonna use dis
Im gonna ask this when i get my wisdom teeth removed lol
"Obama's last name is..."
*Goes under*
Obama is his last name
@@deaththekid922 That's the joke
@@deaththekid922 ok boomer
@@DarkLink1996.
sorry but im at a point where i just asume people online are serious when they ask stupid questions because i have seen so much stupidity already
Minene Uryuu922 I PC Masterrace I understandable
I had to get out my appendix out, so the doctor told me to count down to ten. I then quickly counted it down really fast, the last thing I heard was the nurse saying “that’s cheating”.
That's crazy. The countdown thing never works for me, I've gotten to 70 & said "this isn't working, I just feel like I'm starting to float" & they then used & IV rather than gas & it worked.
I'm extremely resistant to many drugs, as well as alcohol (used to drink 4 gallons of liquor a week for severe chronic pain)
Christopher Michael I don’t think using alcohol for chronic pain is a good way to deal with it..
Alek are you a certified doctor?
The autistic Artist There is way better way to deal with chronic pain, daily alcohol usage can damage the liver and there is no need to be a doctor to know this...
LifeIsFreaking Interesting ehhhhh sorry I wouldn’t know. I’m not even old enough to drive so I wouldn’t understand these things. You, my friend, have taught me something new today 😊
next time i go under, i’m gonna shut my eyes and say “ that’s a bright light. why does that man have wings?”
madlad
I had a surgery and when I was passing out I yelled at the top of my voice
"Don't let my friends in until I can speak full numbers they wil...."*passed out*
Then when I woke up I yelled
"Will draw all over my face with sharpie!!!!!!"
They were actually planning to do they tho
One thing about propofol, at least for me, is that when you wake up, you wake up _fully_ , without any drowsiness or wooziness. OMG, the spell-checker knows "wooziness."
Lmao
imagine right before you go under they say "are they an organ donor?"
s a d "Which leg are we amputating again?"
Why was I made to feel nothing but pain lmao
Gokussgame what? Are you okay?
@@yerro504 "why was i made to feel nothing but pain" is the person he's replying to lmao
Doctor: Wait...oh, this isn’t the guy getting both legs amputated? Oops...
“Who’s the guy in the black robe?”
*passes out
"Didnt know you guys have black coats"
XD
FBI Agent 👀
It's death😂😂😂😉
Red pill blue pill
When you wake up from anesthesia:
"Hey, you, you are finally awake"
Damn you stormcloaks
To the block Prisoner
“The body is under the floorboards”
"I can't feel my face when I'm with you"
"cause I numbed it"
cracked me up so hard lmao
BelgiumShady “oh, I thought it was the cocaine”
Right lmao
Een Belg?
My uncle shattered his hand with a hammer while putting up a shelf and had to get it to reconstructed and before they put him under he asked the doctor in an overly dramatic tone if he'd be able to play the piano.
The doc confused by the this said sure it should be possible, my uncle then burst out with "GOOD BECAUSE I COULDENT BEFORE!."
What a legend
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
this is the best one hahahaha
I remember reading this somewhere before. ( -.-)
Lmfao
When I was about to have surgery. The guy put the mask on me. After a little while, I acted as if I were out, when he took the mask off, I quickly “jumped” at him and scared the shit out of him.
For some reason, I don’t pass out quickly. I had a doctor once ask me behind my family’s back if I was on some kind of drugs, after like 15 minutes of not passing out.
WTH! 😂😂
Scaring a surgeon is a rookie mistake. You got lucky kid.
Lmfao noo 🤣
"I demand a bedtime story"
Love it
Definitely what I'm gonna say
"I demand a bedtime story"
*crosses arms and pouts*
So I’ve had the privilege of having 7 surgeries from injuries sustained as a wrestler. It took me 7 surgeries to finally get this joke I’d wanted to do as I was going out... Here I am about to have my ACL reconstructed and as I’m feeling the propofol take affect, I say “Hey everyone, want to know how to keep a doctor in suspense?” and the whole OR fell quiet awaiting my response. To which, they never got as I had finally succumbed to the anesthesia. According to my surgeon, they sat and waited for about 20 seconds before realizing that the joke was me being knocked out and having them waiting for an answer in suspense. After which, she said they laughed for a good minute or two before starting the procedure.
Next week, I get to experience it all over again in another surgery... I’ll make sure to do it again lol.
That gave me a good chuckle.
It's been 2 weeks now. Any news, my guy?
Zak Jet I unfortunately was too drugged to remember to do it😕 Surgery went well though, roughly 65% of my acetabular labrum was torn and it was repaired. No clue how I managed to do that one but hey, it’s fixed and I have less pain than before surgery so I’m stoked🙌🏽
But are you planning retirement or 8 surgeries is to be expected in your line of work?
Morlun91 Oh yeah haha, I retired from wrestling a few years ago! After my 3rd shoulder surgery (which was a biceps tenodesis - where they cut the long head of the biceps and attach it into the distal portion of the bicipital groove), my surgeon was very real with me and told me there could be some serious consequences if I damaged what he had done. So, I hung up the wrestling shoes and focused in on my studies and guitar playing. It’s unfortunate though as I never got to wrestle a collegiate match. But, it’s been a blessing through the grand scheme of it all.
Ultimately, my body feels wonderful now and after the hip I’m feeling normal again for the first time in years. I’m graduating from my undergrad this May and am pursuing a Ph.D. in exercise physiology because I want to teach. Luckily, I don’t need to be too mobile for that profession haha :)
When you pass out and start closing your eyelids only to see the Avengers in your room with balloons
The first thing they say: "You get to name it!"
I've been searching this video for almost a week now just to read this comment.
Spetsgruppa V Kapkan Want a balloon? 😂
Shat up
Your meme is stolen
“Wait who’s that guy at the doorway in the black ro-“
Goes under
"So you're just going to amputate the one toe, right?" When going under for a different survery.
I asked the Anesthesiologist in a slurry Connery voice: "Do you expect me to talk, Goldfinger?"
Quickly he said "No Mr Bond, I expect you to sleep."
If I ever get surgery I will use this
I LAUGHED thank you.
The funny thing is ‘ I expect you to sleep ‘ cuz idk what u meant
Yasss
Solid gold
"Well I suppose you are all wondering why I have gathered you here today." is a good one
This... Is a bucket
I wanna use this in my future surgeries if I'll have more
Omg this is beautiful
Funnier in an elevator
When I woke up from getting my wisdom teeth removed my parents kept telling me that I wanted to fight justin bieber. To this day I still want to fight him lol
"I'll be back in a bit, I'm just going out for a pack of cigarettes "
*dies*
RIP man....
It's been 3 months but we're still waiting for those cigarattes......
If I was having head surgery, right before I went under I would say “you know which leg it is, right?”
That's great
I did this when they operated my leg. After surgery they came in and asked "How do you feel?" - "Great I can already move my arm again!"
80th like
@@beeowo7030 WHAT A GREAT CONTRIBUTION TO THIS COMMENT
Terminator 0783 Who pissed in your Cheerios? 😂
As an adult I've only been knocked out for surgery once, to get my wisdom teeth removed. The orthopedic surgeon told me that as the anesthesia sets in, I will start to get an erection. The last thing I remember is turning to the cute nurse and saying "Don't get too excited now. We have to stay professional here." Lmao
Douglas Forsyth *Awkward Silence*
Fucking legend
Best comment ever
Amazing
Plot twist: She was married with 2 kids
This isn’t funny, but when I had a tooth pulled out, I’m told I tried to grab the doctor’s hand and bite it. Not sure why. Think I was ANGRY. Still remains a mystery.
Last thing the tooth ever did
When I had my teeth taken out the gas they gave me made me flaming hot mad. I had to keep my hands clenched in my lap so I didn't try to grab the dentist.
Dudasthegamer: Well played. I applaud you.
Was having a colonoscopy and the doctor started to do the operation before I was under.
He put his hands on my rear and I jumped a little then said “At least buy me dinner first.”
The nurse was wide eyed and said to him “he’s not out yet” then she gave me more anesthetic
"this must be what dying feels like"
"oh, my, God"
lmfaooooo
I bet she said that in a valley girl accent
I thought way too hard about that one. The coldness and the numbness is correct though.
He probably gave the nurse a heart attack
Surgeon: "count from 10 backwards"
Me: "A b c d e f p j k"
In a serious voice.
Love that
Wait is that not how u count for ten backwards?
Nice one!
@JKMiracle woooooooosh
"Doc, I forgot to mention....I'm allergic to ether."
Doctor: *oh shit.....*
Surgeon: You're gonna start to feel sleepy in a few seconds
Me: But you haven't even read me a bedtime story yet
Me: *dies*
“This must be what dying feels like”
-a mad lad
Ah sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet here we go again
r/madlads
Nurse: "Count from 10 to 0 and you'll be out"
Me: *counts backwards from 10* "Done, can I get a sticker now?"
Doc: "Why is he still awake?"
Me: "I'm a good-" *passes out*
BOooooooyyyyyyyy... (Voice gets progressively deeper)
A sad one to say is "my battery is low and it's getting dark"
Or you can say "ight imma head out"
Edit: "ooh this shit be hitting different" is also kinda funny
When I got surgery on my arm, I remember exclaiming I'd go to a themepark the day after I woke up.
Apparently drugged out me was really stubborn and we went to the themepark, terrible mistake but good story.
Me starting to black out
Surgeon: “Alright look up the wiki-how”
Edit: holy guacamole that's a lot of likes
LMFAO
NO NO NO N-
I dont get it
@@darienvinke9565 the surgeon's gonna look up how to do surgery on wiki-how 😂
Dariën Vinke wiki how has the worst tips ever
Okay, no joke, the nurse for my school was named Mrs. Cheryl Stark. One day, I was feeling sick, so I legit said, "Mrs. Stark, I don't feel so good."
Long story short, I was sent back to class because she thought I was joking around about feeling sick.
EDIT: I threw up in class.
Ha
F
F
Ha
I don't get it?
"Does anybody need anything while I'm out" put me in a witch cackling fit. 😂😂😂
After my colonoscopy still drugged up
Me: Can I get ice cream
Doc: ok
Me: it’s not for me
Doc: who’s it for? *confused look*
Me: it’s for my ass
Doctor: laughs and gets me ice cream
It was sherbert
Evolution joke 😉
Steve true story but it was the inspiration
Damn I loved that movie
having that test done, the best part/ easiest part was the Propofol... The night before is hell...
I was getting my wisdom teeth out and when I woke up my mom asked "are you bleeding " and I said In my still drugged voice "I dONt GoT tImE tO bLeEd"
Fuck yes, Predator
I’m going to need that
Oml I need to get my 4 wisdom teeth out and a cavity tooth (a bit sad cause I felt safe at this one place but insurance doesnt cover it so I gotta go to some torture looking factory) so I'm looking for things to lighten the mood and make them laugh (and most likely frick up my teeth cause they're either subtly messed with or laughing their heads off
What are these wisdom teeth? You remove them and become dumb af?
@@lefterisphasarias8934 you lose wisdom
”Bravo six going dark”
Samuel F bruh
Lmao
Lmfa00000
Best one now i want surgery
LMFAO
Anesthesiologist: Ok you're gonna start feeling kinda woozy now
Me: Wow, theres 3 of you in here! Now 5! Now 7! Now- *out*
‘Count to 10’ ... “I’m a bit tired, ask me when I wake up’
Underrated
I apparently woke up in the middle of my surgery and said: "Hey, Doc. Is it too late to go to the toilet?"
Doctor: *holds lung and heart* “What.”
chicken mcnuggets
Jesus Christ 😂
My ear was getting surgery and they had to give me gas to put me to sleep, and I asked:
"Whats this funny stuff?"
Doctor: "Laughing gas, it always makes people laugh."
Me: "I bet you I wont laugh."
Doctor: "Poop."
Me: "Hahahahaha"
Also me: "dammit."
Then I passed out.
Why did I laugh at this
NJ Playz Exact same surgery and exact same conversation. You’re scaring me
Awww you're so cute
Your ear? I am disabled & they pay only for emergencies. I lost part of my earlobe as the flesh underwent necrosis. No idea what caused it, though a brown recluse made a baseball sized piece of my flesh die, even down to the bone. I took care of the daily cleaning, removing more dead flesh, & packing it daily. When I could finally see the doctor I showed him & he said "that's impressive, most people mess up & make it worse when self treating." I still have a crater there on my thigh & the leg is weaker due to muscle loss. Stupid spiders. That one is less than a quarter in size, so don't judge spiders by size. Plus the initial bite felt like a tiny poke or pinch.
Honestly laughed till I cried!
Thanks, I needed that! 😂
When I broke my arm they had to put 3 pins in right before I blacked out from anesthesia I asked is this a jojo reference? I heard 1 nurse crack up so hard we had to stop for a second I then passed out
*ザワールド*
I would say to the doctor before I go out:
"I wanna wake up"
I told my dad, a cop
“This must be why people love drugs”
Then I passed out
Carson Thomas good stuff
thats good
good
Yes
😂 oops
"I'll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip-..."
*black out*
*wakes up*
And a large soda
Why is this Soo funny to me just the fact you continue after
“I better not wake up 6 feet under and if I do there better be cake”
"Don't sew up anything that's supposed to remain open."
My last thought before going under was "That's not oxygen." I regret not saying that out loud.
I thought the exact same thing with my wisdom teeth surgery! I just thought my orthodontist said that because he's a paediatric specialist
I took my mask off after they said it was oxygen but felt myself going out. They tried to pull a fast one but I wanted to let them know I wasn't going to let them get away with it completely. For the record, I was okay with the gas and was ready for them to put me out but the lying got me heated.
Patient: there’s a spooky skeleton in there
Surgeon: when I’m done their might be a ghost too
O_o
*I’m gonna stop you right there*
I mean, you never know?
This must be what dying feels like but at least you’ll meet the greatest host M. Jackson for that blow.
"Jeez, this is rusty" followed by "have you seen my watch?" Had me in tears
I was singing Weird Al Yankovic “Like a Surgeon” before going under for an appendectomy
As a surgeon say: "hey siri, how do i perform brain surgery?"
THIS
THIS IS THE BEST I'VE EVER SEEN
Omg the poor patient! 😂
Right before they go out
“Ok, now open up the wikihow page.”
That is cruel
"No... Noo... Nooo... If I fall asleep, the demon king will be releeeeeeased"
After I got my appendix taken out, when I woke up I asked “so how long did you make it?”
Zero laughs
I had to go for a surgery,I remember them placing a green mask on me,the doctor jokingly said“Any last words?"
I said“If I die,sleep with your eyes open"and passed out
Oh. My. Fucking.God.
That is class.
"goddamnit you killed me" "quick were losing me" laughed so hard I had tears rolling down my cheek
SAME IM DYING😂😂
I recently had surgery and just before it went black I said:
"Please, please keep my IV in!"
I had ripped out 7 IVs because they couldn't propperly put them in
There's no physically possible way to put in an IV to stop it from being ripped out. You're just a nervous Nellie.
“Mr Stark, i don’t feel so good.”
As the Surgeon: "Don't worry, I've logged 20 hours in Surgeon Simulator"
Me: "Oh shiiiiiiii-" *Black out*
69 likes, nice.
Genuine LOL from me
If i was the surgeon I’d be like:
“Ok pull up the wikihow article”
S I love yo-----your comment
So underrated
I put the 69th like
LMFAO UNDERRATED
*giggle fit ensues while the patient screams*
"Bravo 6 going dark"
"I'll see you in the future doc" I ACTUALLY DID THATTTT
after waking up i had a very strong urge for lemonade and asked them for "Watered lemons"
Lol
I love watered lemons
@@nithidesikan6458 same
This is the best one here
“Wait, what’s the safe word?”😂 I’m dying
I didn't get this 😅.... Can someone explain?
@Srija Mitra the joke refers to bdsm (a kind of sexual foreplay involving pain and torture) the instrument the doctor was using to keep the patient from biting down resembles a bondage toy that is a ball and strap that one person wraps around the other persons mouth to keep them from moaning or screaming loudly. The “safe word” is a word that the person receiving pain says if the pain is too much and it will make the pain giver stop. Usually the person experiencing pain is called a masochist (a person who experiences sexual pleasure through pain) and the person giving the pain is called a sadist (a person who receives sexual pleasure seeing others in pain). If you want to know more, watch the movie “Fifty shades of Grey”. That movie is all about bdsm.
Mallory Orear
My innocence is fading away...
@@mallyO holy heck.... Was totally not expecting this 😂 thanks so much for the reply though
Is that the safe word?
I was waking up from surgery
Me thinking: "hey my vision is blurry... Wouldn't it be funny if I pretended to panic"
"Remember, my dear Obi Wan. I've loved you always. I always will."
*Dies dramatically in typical Star Wars love interest fashion*
Mine was the knock out gas using the mask, right before I went under I said "wait a second... this smells like chloroform." The doctor nearly fell back in his chair, I felt accomplished.
“If I die, I hid 2 million dollars in the-“ *black out*
Underrated, rofl
Big oof
Stolen joke
@V1ral hyper mega oof
@V1ral breathtaking oof
“Mrs. Obama, it’s been an honor”
when i had my wisdom teeth removed the last words went like
me: So when should i feel it
doctor: right about now
me: * fucin goes linp but still awake* god yam, i can. t feels me boody. oh shiiiit.
Doctor: ok
me* sleepong
when i wole up: ohhh heloo theer.
doctor: you wanna try walking
me: hyeck yeah
proceeds to stand up and sprint down the hallway like a drunk man
doctor: oook back to the bed
me: aww already sleep time ok gnight
This kicked me hard lmaoo
Stroke?
The spelling looks like you wrote this while going under
Dudasthegamer Oh god i never looked at this comment after i posted it. Hahah lmao it really does. 😂
Went for open heart surgery and before the meds knocked me out I asked for them to notify the surgeon (hadn't walked into the room yet as far as I'm aware) that I'd like to request that they install an ARC Reactor in place of my heart. The nurses at my side didn't get it until I heard laughter coming from behind them and another nurse simply explained with one word, "Ironman" then the rest of the room broke into laughter. Then right as I was fading out the surgeon walks up and says, "Ok Mr. Stark, let's install Mk. 5." (This was my fifth heart surgery)
Yes
HAHAHAHA-wait. What if they did?
Wait -- 5 heart surgeries??
@@James-May yup being born with a defect requires a lot of updates since the "replacement parts" don't grow along with you since they're not naturally part of the body.
@@thesoullessanomaly3958 oh, I'm sorry to hear that! You're quite a strong person :D
I wish you the best of luck then!!
“Bravo six, going dark” or “aw shit, here we go again” .
MineYourBeesWax THIS IS GOLD!
Yes
That second one is reserved for the second time and after lel
cringeeeee
lol
"Holy sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet" 😂
“When will I get my makeawish thingy”
And then I was out
Two similar, but different things:
My Mom gets really funny whenever she's tired or sleepy. She woke up after her gallbladder surgery.
One nurse asked her "So? What's the punchline?"
My Mom: "...to what?"
Nurse: "...the gorilla joke? You said you'd tell us the punchline later 'to make sure we had a reason' for you to pull through."
My Mom: "...I don't know any gorilla jokes."
The nurse walked out the door and yells to the nurse's station (10 feet away) "Guys, she forgot the gorilla joke!" and groans of disappointment are heard.
I was going under and the doc said "Okay, count from backwards from 10 to 1, but do it slowly."
I think to myself 'Okay, I'm gonna make SURE to stay awake!' so I count with great confidence and focus: "Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two, One."
The doc waits a moment, looks off to the side. "Ummm...wanna do it again?"
I sigh, disappointed, and count again but bored. "Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven-"
Then I notice I'm staring at the ceiling. "Wait...I'm sitting up...I'm in my room...Oh! I guess the surgery is done."
(plotwist) your mom knew the punchline xD
Whelp
I told the anaesthesiologist the gas smelled funny.
He said “yeah your surgeon hasn’t washed his socks for a week”
I laughed then I was out.
I’ve been under the gas eight times by the age of 9 and I have had no funny experiences as far as I’ve been told.
when I went into surgery to get my appendix out I said on anesthesia "woahhhhh, this is good stuff" lmaoooooo
I had my large intestine removed and I asked if I could keep it to make sausage, they had to take 20 min to calm down
wait wtf how do you shit
you what now-
please op, please tell us how you shit now i'm shaking
Holy shit are you ok
Morgan Morgan that’s sad
i like to poo