the last guy: 1. booked himself a 2 week vacation and left his wife with the kids 2. 'graciously' gave her 1 afternoon to relax after he had 2 weeks 3. made her go to his family's BBQ for her 1 afternoon 4. "day of the BBQ kids were screaming"- how do you think they behaved for the 2 weeks you were gone??? 5. asked her to help him during her down time because he couldn't handle his own kids for 1 afternoon even though she did it for 2 weeks 6. made it look like she was the lazy one and like she was making a scene when it was the opposite
It's also very weird that none of his family knew he was away for two whole weeks. Like you don't just go missing for weeks without at least a phone call or a message that you'll be unavailable for a while. Especially his cousin who's supposed to be his "bestest friend". I guess it's just a western thing 🤔 that y'all guys don't communicate with your family? If it would've been my family, my cousin/brother, brother in law or just anyone for that matter would've asked at least one of us to go check on his wife and kids in case if she needs some help. Or one us would've suggested some help without having to be reminded. That's what family is for in the first place. My aunt is a single mom, because her ex was an absolute a-hole acting exactly like the guy in the video. She's also the youngest out of 10 children herself and also the last one to have a child, so sometimes she feels very insecure with her daughter especially when the baby is sick. So she comes to stay at our place, so in case of an emergency there's someone who knows what to do, a.k.a my mom, who's oldest out of the 10 and has raised her younger ones and a couple of her own children.
Horrible father and SO. She deserves better (and hope she's not stuck in that horrible relationship still). Taking care of three small children during two weeks by her own so he could treat himself to a vacation and then not even get a afternoon in return and made to be lazy. I understand her when she told them to f- off aswell. How could they missed the fact that he had left her with the kids for two weeks..I would have been fuming. Maybe because it hits close to home and been experiencing similar myself in the past.
As someone who has had both crying fits and angry blow ups, I can guarantee the crying is MUCH healthier for literally EVERYONE involved. Angry blow ups (that I am actively working on controlling but god it's hard when all you got as a kid was punishment and told not to be upset without anyone trying to help figure out WHY you were getting upset or WHY your anger burns up so hot so fast) hurt EVERYONE and was the cause of my break up. Men, fucking cry. Trust me, you'll feel better and you'll feel a lot less guilt than when you let your anger blow up at the people you claim to love.
I'm a woman and I'm more likely to scream in anger and frustration than cry. I don't like doing so but it's my default when feeling extremely stressed.
@@Deleted-k5cyou feel exhausted because you’re letting go of what you’ve been holding on to. You’re supposed to feel exhausted. It gives you a chance to breathe and then start over. It’s healthier for humans to cry. It physically harms you if you never cry. You can cause cardiovascular diseases from holding back crying or not ever crying. Crying also releases endorphins and oxytocin. It’s your body’s natural trauma response and the very first survival instinct you learn from birth.
The guy with the cheese reminds me of my boyfriend who always buys mochi when he can. He sent me a 10kg box of mochi. In case it was not obvious, my favourite sweet is mochi.
Wow that last guys has zero introspection or respect for his wife. It’s making a “scene” when she chastises him but him yelling across the BBQ calling her lazy is just fine. Moreover, who the fuck gets a bonus and takes a 2-week vacation without their family. Like I’m all down for a boys weekend, hell even a week (maybe, circumstances really depends) but two full weeks in Hawaii, what sounded like alone. That’s so weird to me.
Selfishness of the highest order. She's basically a single parent and he has the audacity to say "for once" as if in those 2 weeks when he was living it up in hawaii the kids weren't at some point all the things he's complaining about at the bbq, except she didn't have anyone else to lean on. I am so mad for her
@@TQM Not even that, you can find the previous voicemail online, he approached her on the street and asked for her number. They never went on a date unless an unhinged voicemail left on the uninterested party's phone counts.
“For once”?? Excuse me??? You’re the one that took a two week vacation ALONE and left her with kids all under 5 to take care of..ALONE. Then you berate her for trying to take time for herself?? Ma’am you’re already acting like a single mom, divorce this man.
Truly sounds like he does not want to be married or have kids, just wants the single life again. She should have filled for the divorce while he was away.
Because he could have gone for one week and taken her with him. And his cousin and childhood friends could have watched the kids. Hope she drove to a lawyers office.
@MatchaBerrii definitely, men who boast about how they waited for the girl they're interested to be legal are gross. Like...why were you waiting? How old was she when you met for you to have to wait?
Okay, I know who Leonardo DiCaprio is, of course, but I think there's a reference here I'm missing. To what show or movie is our pal Dustin referring? I hate being on the outside of a good joke, and this is the first one of Dustin's which has flown straight over my head. Yep, it went whooosh. Please help me out!
Lisa is NOT me. I've done this to my husband: At his family reunion (after i had JUST given birth to my son and btw i flatlined TWICE in delivery because my kidney was actively shutting down, i had a perk tube, bag and everything) at the reunion i sat down with his aunt to play bingo with her and my husband was watching out daughter who was 2 at the time and holding our boy, well he started crying and baby girl got mad that she couldnt play with the big kids on the splashpad by the park without an adult so she was screaming, and my husband brother looked at him and said "she's such a bitch for not helping you with the kids" and my husband said "right?" And im not playing when i tell you i didnt say a word, i just looked at my husband, took my son, stood, got my daughter, put them in the car the WHOLE time he was telling me if i left id regret it blah blah and i told him "you don't wanna watch them so i can have a break? You don't wanna look after your kids? You wanna piss me off by acting like youre fucking helpless? Then don't fucking worry about it, ill take them and you don't have to see them anymore." So i went to my moms and a few hours later he showed up and we talked things out. Turns out his mother had a VERY long heart to heart with him about mother's needing a break AFTER GIVING BIRTH and especially if he works 12 hours EVERY SINGLE DAY and im left alone with them at home while im healing. He basically got a "you're a piece of shit for that behavior" from his mother which made my life brighter.
Men have the need to cry not just for a relationship but also for their mental state. It is healthier expressing great sadness and great joy than to burst into anger. I had a stepdad who was normally just angry. He was a nightmare and loaded with a lot more red flags than just lacking empathy.
not to mention, a lot of men tend to act like they HAVE to be manly and all stoic for women but the truth is, many women LOVE when men embrace their sensitive side
3:08 these guys remind me of my husband. He would always let his little sister handle her own boyfriends, but if one crossed the line and she asked him to, he would take care of it. I hope my sons are like this.
I hope that last woman wasn’t home when that man finally got back from the BBQ. I hope she went somewhere for two weeks so he can spend some quality time with his children. If that were me at that BBQ I would’ve been screaming that he just left me with the kids for two weeks and then lied and said he’d take them one solitary afternoon so I could rest; I’d make sure everyone in a ten mile radius knew he was gaslighting his family and friends to try to shame me make it look like I was lazy in front of everyone. Nope. Not having that 😡
This is just gonna end badly for the children though if she is just gonna leave them unexpectedly with THIS kind of dude I am afraid. Best would probably be to take the kids with her... No vacation for her then of course but the kids can't be left with a father like that and she is very likely doing the job of a single mother already so might as well take the kids away from that toxic asshole.
No way would I put up with some man-baby parading as a living dad & husband screaming at ME to “get off my a** for once.” If he wants to avoid making a scene, then why on earth would he say something so ridiculous and obviously full of untruths? Bro knows he’s about to start a war with that comment! That’s when you scream back @ him the full truth in front of ALL his buddies, take the kids, pack HIS bag (he can sleep elsewhere, not you, the full tube mom), and tell him he’ll hear from your lawyer. ✌️
"All you have to do is take care of kid" Someone please get that man a toddler, then ask if him if he can take a nap, clean a house, or have any saniy left
I love watching my nephews and nieces. Want to nap? Blanket fort and movies. Clean house? Simply teach them what can or can't be touched and to put trash in the trashcan. Y'all act like being stern is hard. Sanity? Got plenty of it. Actually have more of it after cause I got to goof off and be silly.
I started actually laughing out loud when he said “take a nap.” I only have 1 child & I can’t recall the last time I took a nap when he was under the age of 12. Maybe once or twice. You know when you just fall asleep from sheer exhaustion from being a single mom & working full-time, laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning…it was an unintentional nap.
As a stay at home mom I could literally cry any time someone recognizes that it's both beautiful and exhausting. Some kids are more challenging than others and if your child screws up or your house isnt perfect it all gets blamed on you... every time. No one blames the dad unless he's an abusive alcoholic but just showing up isnt being a good dad.
The last one is crazy cuz he literally took a 2week vacation by himself and then screamed at his wife when he said he’d watch the kids after his TWO WEEK VACATION. He literally couldn’t even handle a day of her stress without attacking her for doing exactly what HE does in their relationship.
My brother is 12 years older than our niece. He reacted the same way when she was born. He's been more of a father to her than the sperm donor, and they have an incredible bond.
@@unicorn69 ik, groom in both senses too It's a huge ick that he wants to train someone for a relationship at all, but getting them 'young' to make them lean more towards you or people like you is horrible
Did lemon drop whack that guy? Seriously someone should check on that guy to see if he mysteriously went missing or slipped off a ladder or something. That side eye look to the other brother just screamed “bring a shovel.”
*news anchor voice*: "found embedded in the buried body of the so-called 'nice guy' were shards of glass, one of which appears to be the stem of a martini glass."
For those who don't know it's a message from the early 2000s where a swedish model was approached on the street by an early Internet era pickup artist who called himself Dimitri the Lover and for whatever reason she gave him her number, and then he proceeded to leave several increasingly unhinged voicemails that now get used constantly in different contexts. The man formerly known as Dimitri the Lover is currently in prison for assault, on a woman ofc.
In October my husband had to leave for 5 days for a training course for his work. We have 4 children and at the time they were 6 and under (youngest 15 months). We all (kids and I) got sick with a pretty nasty cold and the baby wouldn’t sleep unless on top of me which means I wasn’t getting any sleep while also dealing with a sore throat and a nasty cough. When he got back he immediately took all four kids and made sure I got to sleep for an entire day with no interruptions and took care of everything and everyone for three days straight until I could breathe normally again. I can’t imagine having a partner that would do what that awful man in the last video did, his wife and kids deserve better.
She should have told them all he left her alone with the kids for two weeks... But they'd probably still call her lazy. Anyway, who just blatantly tells a mom to her face after overhearing a conversation like that, that's she's lazy? That had to be so stressful for her, oh my god.
Omg the stay at home mom dude. “You can’t take a nap at a full time job, you can’t watch tv”. You should meet some people I know that actually can chill and watch tv on their night shift once their clients go to bed. Or watch it with the clients. It’s still a job. But it doesn’t mean you’re on a computer all day
I'm literally risking it for the biscuit here watching TH-cam while at work (overnight shift) with my boss in the other room while she blares songs from the 2000s lmao. But yeah seriously that guy clearly doesn't know shit.
My oldest never let's me nap, not when I'm pregnant, and not when I've been up all night with him or a other child. I look like death because I never get sleep. If a woman is napping with children it is because they are up all night with babies and children that do not let them sleep. Absolutely deluded.
I work in a daycare. Thinking three kids under five years old will ever be well behaved and not have emotional breakdowns and fight every ten seconds in a new environment especially is absolutely laughable. Also you had a two week vacation but forced your wife to your family’s BBQ on the single day you said she could have off and still asked her to take care of the kids on her own and subjected her to the judgement of your family who will only every see your side because well you’re the family member not her. What a marvelous day that could’ve ever been my guy
Carlo (Italian with the cheese) is quite literally the most wholesome guy I've ever seen. Y'all need to look up his videos with his wife, they're the cutest and he's so sweet, his wife is amazing too. I absolutely love their dynamic, goofing around and just enjoying each other so much. When I need my faith in relationships restored, I watch them.
I grew up with 5 other siblings in the house. That’s 6 kids- all the way from toddlers to adults. Needless to say- being a stay at home parent is NOT a full-time vacation. It’s stressful, it really is. You’ve got to maintain the house, making sure a kid isn’t getting killed, figuring out how to feed them everyday, watching over them 24/7 until they learn independency, and more! I honestly don’t know how my mom didn’t just toss us all in a truck and abandon us on the side of the road, but after all she's done for me and my sisters and brothers, I applaud her.
Anger is one of our 6 basic emotions, alongside sadness, happiness, fear, surprise and disgust. All of these can then be further narrowed down in steps between 4 - 8 of which most in turn can be divided into two different ones. So you have a final composition of about 70 emotions or emotional states. Source: Several years of therapy including intense DBT therapy. EDIT: To clarify, I'm not defending what the guy said, I still think it's wrong. But we shouldn't think it's wrong due to something false, there are more than enough proper red flags there.
Always felt reductive to claim anger is a secondary or unreal emotion. Anger is just the active, dynamic realization that "Hey this doesn't feel right, I shouldn't be treated like this." It wears no masks, it's authentic to a fault. Anger stems from people and their experiences, just like all emotions.
I was a stay-at-home mom for four years, this after working full-time full-time for 14 years. Two kids, born two years apart. I want to hear anyone who has *personally* experienced feeding and caring for babies/toddlers, while grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning, and cooking tell me that this isn't equal to working a 40 hour a week job. ("Oh sorry, baby! Your diaper's fucky? I'll get back to you at 9am tomorrow morning. Or try to call in your dad.")
I know the guy at 6:46 and GUYS let me tell you-- he is JUST like that in real life. He's an amazing singer and the sweetest guy with an amazing testimony. I got so surprised when I stumbled over this video and he was in it lol 😆
2:15 His little look of confusion when she said that was already a lot of cheese.... No, ma'am. That was one very modest and restrained Italian right there. He tried his best to keep it small.
Thanks for pointing out the dives we have to do in a day as SAHP! The number of dislocations I’ve endured to save my kids because they figured out the safety equipment and were very determined to find all the “cool” things beyond the gates and covers and locks….. INSANE ingenuity of small minds.
❤❤❤ I absolutely *LOVE* this!!!! Keep doing this!!!! For people that didn't have the luxury of growing up with healthy boundaries and got normalized to toxicity, this is priceless and more valuable than one would ever know!!! And for all those that were blessed, it's a reminder to stay on track and not lose focus or get influenced in this (often times very toxic) world!!! On top of that the commentary is pure GOLD and the descriptions are very accurate!! First time on your channel, gladd I've found you!!!😊😊
10;48 '''dont start a scene', you directed the scene'' is so good and im gonna start using it whenever i stand/speak up for myself and get told this thank you 🥺
Everything about Dustin's videos is great, but I especially appreciated him talking about how being a stay-at-home parent is a job. If you were working for someone else, you'd be paying for childcare. Which is obviously that person's job. Just because you don't get a paycheck for being at home caring for you kids doesn't make it any easier or less important than a "normal" job
It is most definitely a job. I babysit my nephew quite a bit and he is a combination of Taz (Looney Tunes) and the Energizer Bunny. Love him, but I can honestly say I am relieved to go back to my job. I work a grueling job as a chef, yet it suddenly seems so much easier than before after one day keeping tabs on him.
My husband is a SAHD; he's thinking about going back to work now that kiddo is going to school fulltime, but never have I thought he was sitting on his ass doing nothing; our kid was his primary job.
For once needed the response: "I will make that a reality or you can very VERY kindly walk that statement back to this group of people you just shouted that egregious lie in front of. Your choice. Thinking I'd start with 2 weeks in Hawaii." These men need to get a clue. I don't have kids, but I'd never be so disrespectful to my partner (nor he to me), there was so much wrong with that entire scenario. SO MUCH.
6:15 yes you can't take a nap or watch TV at a full time job. Neither can most stay at home moms. But someone with a job outside of the house gets to clock out and leave at 5 o'clock. Stay at home parents NEVER leave work. We are at work 24/7. We don't have an 8 hour day! We are up changing diapers and feeding at 2am, getting kids dressed at 6am, feeding kids at 7 drive kids to school at 8, cleaning the house & do laundry all day, pick up kids at 3pm, do homework at 4pm, making dinner at 5pm, baths at 8pm and bedtime at 9pm (then play bedtime rodeo for 30-60 minutes) & hopefully go to bed before midnight... To then start it all over again the next day. Doing all that we also have to kiss boo boos, be a referee, be a counselor, be a teacher, etc and try to keep up with our own hygiene and mental health. But ya going to work is much harder.
So a little known fact about testosterone is typical male levels suppress tear response. Men can be just as sad as women but still not be able to cry. I can see how men might decide that anger is the easier response when that can come with a physical release when crying isn’t available- and they’re already encouraged to view anger as masculine and sadness as feminine. Anger also does not have to be anyone else’s problem- If I’m alone in the wood and I yell and kick some sticks around I’m not hurting anyone. The important distinction is who or what that anger is directed towards and shown to. Anger is not a bad emotion, it’s just an emotion. Your *handling* of it is what determines how big a problem it is. Though if you are genuinely *choosing* to react with anger instead of sadness that’s a classic case of anger as a secondary emotion and the primary emotion, the sadness, will still be there after you’re done being angry.
The brother with the creep phonecall reminded me of this time in high school. I think this was when I was a soph or junior. A friend had a creep get a little too pushy for affection. So just cue a little later their chad of a senior big brother coming in during lunch. Still in his jammies and slippers because he didn't have class at that hour so bro was getting to sleep in. I'll just never forget that older brother not giving a good goddang how he looked. Bro had a little sister to protect.
0:00 so, they're upset about having a daughter? THAT disappointed!? I mean, it's still your child... boy or girl, you should grateful either way. It's rather disgusting actually to see such misogyny towards your own unborn child... especially coming from her MOTHER of all people. Just imagine if your parents reacted that way towards you. If you're so unhappy, find a state that still allows abortions and abort... or get over it.
It is a pretty gross reaction, especially caught on camera for their kids to someday find. However, sometimes people just need to be given the time to let go of whatever preconceived notions they had for their children’s lives. My own grandmother told me she threw an immature fit when she found out I was a girl. She wanted her first grandchild to be a boy, as she had raised three of her own and loved mothering them. She refused to see me the first day after my birth. But when she gave in and went to see me, she fell for me the moment we locked eyes. We went on to have an incredible relationship I will cherish forever. I can only hope the same thing happens for the family in that first clip.
Some women don't want daughters because they don't want another female to compete against for their partner's affection. Yeah, I know. Fucking toxic as heck. Poor kid is going to have so much trauma....
To the guy who says you can’t watch tv at work, or take naps. …. Do you not have a lunch period at work? Do you not take breaks? Granted some jobs don’t have those things, but most do. I live close enough to home I stop by every lunch, heck sometimes I take a quick nap!
Yeah I'm the breadwinner in the fam, and that dude is full of shit. Being a parent doesn't fucking stop; I fully admit that there are times where I go into the office not because i have to, but because I get a break from the high-energy adorable needy munchkin called my child. People who call SAHP parents are absolute bullshitters; I did not envy my husband when our kid was toddling and he was staying at home.
4:50 27 is not the expiration date on women, I know 50 year olds that are still menstruating, my mom has gotten pregnant well past 40 wtf is this dude on?
6:30 literally. No kids here, but I’ve worked at daycares for 2 years. I didn’t even need a day on the job to experience firsthand how difficult and stressful it is to look after children (especially at that age when they can’t do very much for themselves).
I CANNOT tell you just how much I respect you! I as a stay at home mom. If a Kindergartener... was just hospitalized for stress. Anyone , man or woman. Whoever stays at home is working NONSTOP. IT DOESN'T STOP. Thank you for this content. I love y'all, sir, and your girl are amazing. ❤
7:48 I will never forget how one time when I got really angry I grabbed a bat and hit my desk three times. I remmeber fuming and breathing and for a few seconds I felt ok, but then I relised what I had done. This was the desk my father got me to help me during the pandemic, the desk I went to get with him, and most importantly, I didn't feel better. I don't have that desk anymore but I will never forget that memory. It taught me that anger isn't a substitute to processing emotions, you can only process them through thought and conversation. I also learned that acting through aggression won't solve anything, if anything it makes things worse and makes me feel worse. So I cry, I cry a lot and I'm not always mentally ok but I feel much better afterwords then if I did something through aggression.
When your man literally says they are training you. Get tf out Man so glad that my dad is a psychologist. Calm and reasonable at all times. Willing to talk to anyone at any age as an equal. As a kid he helped me work through letting go of a childhood blanket. Took me outside the night he took it away and we watched the stars together while I calmed down. All you guys and gals out there be that person to your kid!
8:40, I needed to hear this guy get made fun of. My dad and I live together and we are grieving my grandmother, his mom, as of last week. My whole life my dad has had a temper that’s sloooowly gotten better. While we’re both going though it, my dad has flown off the handle more than a few times. It triggers my fight or flights real bad when he gets loud and mean. He just takes his bad feelings out on me. As his kid I’m highly attuned to his feelings and trying to predict or prevent an outburst. I learned to cry (I am his daughter), but I also learned I MYSELF am not allowed anger. If I ever stand up for myself I run the risk of him yelling at me more, but I would be finally dealing with it the ‘man’ way. Instead of caretaking constantly and people pleasing to folks who don’t care what my PTSD is doing to me in that moment. I love my dad. But I’m so tired of my nerves being frazzled constantly. He calls me names and yells at me and then gives some shitty excuse. Hearing the guy in the video talk about how men HAVE to express it that way gave me a knot in my stomach; but then it got the red flag and all at once you helped remind me his explosive, poorly regulated behavior is not my fault and burden for the rest of my adult life. So yeah. Needed to see this today!
I am so sorry and I felt every word you said! Because I clam up and shut things up inside tears and anger because either response will cause a reaction I just cant deal with on top of the already tense situation. My father was physically and mentally abusive never any excuse other than I am just a girl wtf do I know???? That I am stupid (mind you have 4 degrees and over 120+ IQ) Have figured out complex issues for him but will never get past I am a girl and will be forever less than human to him. But who I comes from G-d's word not humans. I pray you find true healing and peace from deep inside
I love how man explaining stay-at-home-mom is not a job, but when you take in consideration that children, a partner and possible pets come with responsibilities that are given to stay-at-home-mom (or dad in regards who wishes to be the breadwinner). Think of the laundry, you need to essentially laundry almost every day. You need to sort and know who's clothes is who's. Imagine this without a laundry machine, imagine going every day to a laundryroom or other facility in city every morning. You need to clean the mess children put up. You need to also teach children mostly alone about morals and what to do or not do. You need to wash dishes every day. Depending maybe every two days. You need to make sure you have enough clean dishes to use. Imagine this without dishwasher in 4-5 person household. You need to cook every day, because homecooking is least expensive way economically. You also have to teach young children how to eat properly and learn about balanced diet to keep children healthy and not getting sick. You have to tend the children, if they're sick. You have to make sure children don't eat sweets excessively or outside the 'candy saturday' or something. Also, you need to clean the house to keep it organized and safe space for children to roam. You need to attend with children, should they request guidance with studies. You need to make sure they do their homework, and not play games too long. Also give them something fun to do outside like pokemon GO or some other outdoor activity that could give children a chance for dopamine rush. You need to make them breakfast and something to eat before bed. Depending how old the child is, they will eventually learn from their parent how to do it. Also, you need to teach child over time how to do these daily things you do, since it is their way to learn independence as they age. Sure, you don't get paid for it. However doing all this at home is good enough experience to do various caretaker jobs, which stay-at-home-mothers would find good use of once their kids grow up, or their husband leaves them abruptly.
My mom was a stay at home mom and my stepdad may as well have been absent. My mom's disabled and my sister is bipolar, and we're all neurodivergent. Being a stay at home mom is not easy. It's hard, and sometimes you mess up.
6:09 this guy had me pissed off. Like 4 months? Try 12 , try no paychecks and tax returns. Try 7 straight years of not being able to socialize with adults and only being good with kids now. Stay at home moms have a job that is rough and a blessing all at once.
I wish I had these red and green flag videos when I was young, but I am sure glad my child has access to see them. I do NOT want my child repeating a cycle we didn't know we were in. ❤❤❤❤
I'm dead for the guy with the cheese. "There's no cheese over there." "I brought cheese, but not a lot of cheese," pulls out like 5kg of cheese. "I told you not to do that" looks at her like she just broke up with him. 😂😂😂
I had a friend in highschool who offered me his sweatshirt because I was feeling insecure about my body that day. I still remember this gesture to this day. It was very meaningful to me
I'm sorry but I don't care who you are, I ain't giving you my phone password. Not because I'm disloyal or untrustworthy, but because I'm a huge nerd who draws digital fanart (and just draws in general) and reads fanfiction. Simple as that. It's the same kind of anxiety of someone flipping through an artist's sketchbook without permission. Just no.
If my husband can't get into my phone, then how can I get him to check things for me when it's too far away to reach? On the flip side, I know his pass- pattern, but I never get it right, so I always have to make him open it for me and it drives him crazy that I can't do it myself.
This is really not the same thing, and I'm telling you this as a person with anxiety who also reads fanfiction and draws fanart and other 'cringe' shit. And you shouldn't be dating someone who'd judge you for that anyways
I feel this. I have nothing to hide, but my phone is a part of my space. I wouldn't want my husband riffling through my wallet for no reason. It's just... Snoopy. And not in a fun cartoon beagle kind of way.
the last guy:
1. booked himself a 2 week vacation and left his wife with the kids
2. 'graciously' gave her 1 afternoon to relax after he had 2 weeks
3. made her go to his family's BBQ for her 1 afternoon
4. "day of the BBQ kids were screaming"- how do you think they behaved for the 2 weeks you were gone???
5. asked her to help him during her down time because he couldn't handle his own kids for 1 afternoon even though she did it for 2 weeks
6. made it look like she was the lazy one and like she was making a scene when it was the opposite
It's also very weird that none of his family knew he was away for two whole weeks. Like you don't just go missing for weeks without at least a phone call or a message that you'll be unavailable for a while. Especially his cousin who's supposed to be his "bestest friend". I guess it's just a western thing 🤔 that y'all guys don't communicate with your family? If it would've been my family, my cousin/brother, brother in law or just anyone for that matter would've asked at least one of us to go check on his wife and kids in case if she needs some help. Or one us would've suggested some help without having to be reminded. That's what family is for in the first place.
My aunt is a single mom, because her ex was an absolute a-hole acting exactly like the guy in the video. She's also the youngest out of 10 children herself and also the last one to have a child, so sometimes she feels very insecure with her daughter especially when the baby is sick. So she comes to stay at our place, so in case of an emergency there's someone who knows what to do, a.k.a my mom, who's oldest out of the 10 and has raised her younger ones and a couple of her own children.
One word: Disgusting
also like, he didn't even defend her when the family was accusing her behind her back!
He was definitely having an affair. Who TF goes to Hawaii ALONE for two weeks while they got a wife and three new kids?
Horrible father and SO. She deserves better (and hope she's not stuck in that horrible relationship still). Taking care of three small children during two weeks by her own so he could treat himself to a vacation and then not even get a afternoon in return and made to be lazy. I understand her when she told them to f- off aswell. How could they missed the fact that he had left her with the kids for two weeks..I would have been fuming. Maybe because it hits close to home and been experiencing similar myself in the past.
As someone who has had both crying fits and angry blow ups, I can guarantee the crying is MUCH healthier for literally EVERYONE involved. Angry blow ups (that I am actively working on controlling but god it's hard when all you got as a kid was punishment and told not to be upset without anyone trying to help figure out WHY you were getting upset or WHY your anger burns up so hot so fast) hurt EVERYONE and was the cause of my break up.
Men, fucking cry. Trust me, you'll feel better and you'll feel a lot less guilt than when you let your anger blow up at the people you claim to love.
💯💯💯And heart disease!! Anger eats away at your body, it literally destroys you!!
I'm a woman and I'm more likely to scream in anger and frustration than cry. I don't like doing so but it's my default when feeling extremely stressed.
@@Deleted-k5cyou feel exhausted because you’re letting go of what you’ve been holding on to. You’re supposed to feel exhausted. It gives you a chance to breathe and then start over. It’s healthier for humans to cry. It physically harms you if you never cry. You can cause cardiovascular diseases from holding back crying or not ever crying. Crying also releases endorphins and oxytocin. It’s your body’s natural trauma response and the very first survival instinct you learn from birth.
@@Deleted-k5cFeeling emotionally exhausted is normal, it's what it's supposed to do. Because you are letting go of the pain/overwhelming emotions.
As a woman, I do not doubt men cry. Emotional openness and emotional honesty are important. Not just in a relationship, but for the mental state too.
The guy with the cheese reminds me of my boyfriend who always buys mochi when he can. He sent me a 10kg box of mochi. In case it was not obvious, my favourite sweet is mochi.
Oh that's so cute~!
this is sweeter than the mochi
nice
He reminds me of my boyfriend. He’s Italian and loves cheese. He would totally do that. It’s honestly adorable.
10kg?! I did not know mochi was sold in such quantities!
Wow that last guys has zero introspection or respect for his wife. It’s making a “scene” when she chastises him but him yelling across the BBQ calling her lazy is just fine. Moreover, who the fuck gets a bonus and takes a 2-week vacation without their family. Like I’m all down for a boys weekend, hell even a week (maybe, circumstances really depends) but two full weeks in Hawaii, what sounded like alone. That’s so weird to me.
Selfishness of the highest order. She's basically a single parent and he has the audacity to say "for once" as if in those 2 weeks when he was living it up in hawaii the kids weren't at some point all the things he's complaining about at the bbq, except she didn't have anyone else to lean on. I am so mad for her
I can't believe he wrote that and didn't catch a clue.
@@suonatar1 well he’s entitled to all he gets she should just be grateful he blessed her with two children
I bet he's a cheater. That two-week vacation was with a mistress.
@@janeelliot2280 That was my first guess!!!!
That creepers call gave me actual shivers down my spine.
That brother is golden.
I remember that call. It's from years ago. He left her multiple voicemails, each getting more unhinged. th-cam.com/video/uRdmgDbswrI/w-d-xo.html
I'm confused what exactly happened with that call and the following ones? I'm just learning about the case
@@natturallyfreeriders7545Probably as simple as the girlfriend didn't call him back immediately
@@L16htW4rr10r she's not his girlfriend. They just went on a date or two
@@TQM Not even that, you can find the previous voicemail online, he approached her on the street and asked for her number. They never went on a date unless an unhinged voicemail left on the uninterested party's phone counts.
“For once”?? Excuse me??? You’re the one that took a two week vacation ALONE and left her with kids all under 5 to take care of..ALONE. Then you berate her for trying to take time for herself?? Ma’am you’re already acting like a single mom, divorce this man.
Dude can't handle watching his kids for 1 single day but had no issue leaving his wife for 2 weeks. What a pathetic excuse of a man
Truly sounds like he does not want to be married or have kids, just wants the single life again. She should have filled for the divorce while he was away.
If anything she wouldn't have to deal with his bitchin or shit friends, an improvement!!
Because he could have gone for one week and taken her with him. And his cousin and childhood friends could have watched the kids. Hope she drove to a lawyers office.
That part of the video infuriated me and the audacity of those damn people taking his side was absurd!
“When they’re 19 you can train them”
🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢
I actually did have to hold back vomit that time.
It also sounds like English isn't the girl's first language, like yikes 😬
Yep , that man has to be on some kind of watchlist
Absolute waste of oxygen
@MatchaBerrii definitely, men who boast about how they waited for the girl they're interested to be legal are gross. Like...why were you waiting? How old was she when you met for you to have to wait?
"who taught your biology class? Professor DiCaprio?"
Lol, I spat out my drink! 😂🤣
more like the Habsburgs
This was the one that got me 😂😂😂
I said the same thing! 😂
I almost choked while I ate my breakfast 😂
Okay, I know who Leonardo DiCaprio is, of course, but I think there's a reference here I'm missing. To what show or movie is our pal Dustin referring? I hate being on the outside of a good joke, and this is the first one of Dustin's which has flown straight over my head. Yep, it went whooosh. Please help me out!
Sir, from women everywhere, I thank you deeply and wish you the life you deserve
The guy thinking being an at home mom is the same as being at home without children??? What dude
Right!
He's smooth brained, there's a lot of this world he doesn't understand 😂
Critical thinking skills are something he clearly has never heard of or made use of
"At a full time job you got someone constantly watching you" ok so exectly like having a child then
@@TQMhow can he be smooth brained when he doesn't even have one?
What does he mean, “women have til 27 to have kids”? Dude, my mom had me at 38 and that’s far from the oldest woman to give birth.
That’s an amazing thing that screws up both men and women’s brain called ✨misogyny✨
Right?! My best friend's mom had her kids at 35 and 43! That guy is so many red flags rolled into one its insane
Right?! I heard that and went "What!! My mom had her last child at 45!"
My mom had me at 30 and my brother at 34.
My aunt literally had my cousin when she was 41
Men literally cannot understand basic women anatomy and biology it’s embarrassing
Lisa is NOT me. I've done this to my husband:
At his family reunion (after i had JUST given birth to my son and btw i flatlined TWICE in delivery because my kidney was actively shutting down, i had a perk tube, bag and everything) at the reunion i sat down with his aunt to play bingo with her and my husband was watching out daughter who was 2 at the time and holding our boy, well he started crying and baby girl got mad that she couldnt play with the big kids on the splashpad by the park without an adult so she was screaming, and my husband brother looked at him and said "she's such a bitch for not helping you with the kids" and my husband said "right?" And im not playing when i tell you i didnt say a word, i just looked at my husband, took my son, stood, got my daughter, put them in the car the WHOLE time he was telling me if i left id regret it blah blah and i told him "you don't wanna watch them so i can have a break? You don't wanna look after your kids? You wanna piss me off by acting like youre fucking helpless? Then don't fucking worry about it, ill take them and you don't have to see them anymore." So i went to my moms and a few hours later he showed up and we talked things out. Turns out his mother had a VERY long heart to heart with him about mother's needing a break AFTER GIVING BIRTH and especially if he works 12 hours EVERY SINGLE DAY and im left alone with them at home while im healing.
He basically got a "you're a piece of shit for that behavior" from his mother which made my life brighter.
Mothers need a break even when they haven't just given birth. Glad things ended well for you and ur hubby got some understanding.
Wow, a decent mother-in-law. I'd stick around just for her - she's one in a million!
Sounds like a great mother in law, I’m glad she was in your corner. She probably felt shocked her son was such a douche
So... yr still married to this guy?
@@SpecialBlanket that’s what I was thinking 😭😭
That “your emotions aren’t bottled up, they’re *_vacuum sealed.”_* line got me 🤣🤣🤣
Men have the need to cry not just for a relationship but also for their mental state. It is healthier expressing great sadness and great joy than to burst into anger. I had a stepdad who was normally just angry. He was a nightmare and loaded with a lot more red flags than just lacking empathy.
Right there with you in the stepdad department. Heavily relate to this.
@@DustinPoynterVideos He is out of my life and my emotionally abusive mother, so it is fine. Been with my dad and he is a far greater improvement.
not to mention, a lot of men tend to act like they HAVE to be manly and all stoic for women but the truth is, many women LOVE when men embrace their sensitive side
@@velvettehayes9434 Those are the ones that last.
Sometimes you just need to scream, but mostly you just need to cry
3:08 these guys remind me of my husband. He would always let his little sister handle her own boyfriends, but if one crossed the line and she asked him to, he would take care of it. I hope my sons are like this.
I hope that last woman wasn’t home when that man finally got back from the BBQ. I hope she went somewhere for two weeks so he can spend some quality time with his children. If that were me at that BBQ I would’ve been screaming that he just left me with the kids for two weeks and then lied and said he’d take them one solitary afternoon so I could rest; I’d make sure everyone in a ten mile radius knew he was gaslighting his family and friends to try to shame me make it look like I was lazy in front of everyone. Nope. Not having that 😡
There's no doubt in my mind that "solitary vacation" was with a mistress
This is just gonna end badly for the children though if she is just gonna leave them unexpectedly with THIS kind of dude I am afraid. Best would probably be to take the kids with her... No vacation for her then of course but the kids can't be left with a father like that and she is very likely doing the job of a single mother already so might as well take the kids away from that toxic asshole.
No way would I put up with some man-baby parading as a living dad & husband screaming at ME to “get off my a** for once.” If he wants to avoid making a scene, then why on earth would he say something so ridiculous and obviously full of untruths? Bro knows he’s about to start a war with that comment! That’s when you scream back @ him the full truth in front of ALL his buddies, take the kids, pack HIS bag (he can sleep elsewhere, not you, the full tube mom), and tell him he’ll hear from your lawyer. ✌️
3:56 The reason he's dating a 19 year old is because it's illegal to date younger. When he says "train" he's thinking "groom".
Yes. When he said you can train them he gestured towards her body. So outwardly saying "train" but inwardly saying this young body is why.
I'm so so glad Dustin called him on that.
"All you have to do is take care of kid" Someone please get that man a toddler, then ask if him if he can take a nap, clean a house, or have any saniy left
Please don't really get that man a toddler though. 😅
I love watching my nephews and nieces. Want to nap? Blanket fort and movies. Clean house? Simply teach them what can or can't be touched and to put trash in the trashcan. Y'all act like being stern is hard. Sanity? Got plenty of it. Actually have more of it after cause I got to goof off and be silly.
I started actually laughing out loud when he said “take a nap.” I only have 1 child & I can’t recall the last time I took a nap when he was under the age of 12. Maybe once or twice. You know when you just fall asleep from sheer exhaustion from being a single mom & working full-time, laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning…it was an unintentional nap.
Considering how that guy acts, I think he'd get confused and think it's a blind date. He seems like one of the disciples of DiCaprio to me
He has never had a preschooler who loves to tell knock knock jokes. On about joke 40, you are just ready to lose it.
As a stay at home mom I could literally cry any time someone recognizes that it's both beautiful and exhausting. Some kids are more challenging than others and if your child screws up or your house isnt perfect it all gets blamed on you... every time. No one blames the dad unless he's an abusive alcoholic but just showing up isnt being a good dad.
Some people won’t blame him even then.
Exactly ❤
this guy with the flags is literally a walking green flag
"I Told you not to do that..."
"*saddest eyes ive seen* why not?.."
Omfg, right?! Those are the saddest cheese eyes I've ever seen. That man deserves all the cheese!!
She felt bad for taking up cheese room🥺 @@THG-3141
The last one is crazy cuz he literally took a 2week vacation by himself and then screamed at his wife when he said he’d watch the kids after his TWO WEEK VACATION. He literally couldn’t even handle a day of her stress without attacking her for doing exactly what HE does in their relationship.
That uncle made me cry f-ing beautiful man
I have tears on my face because he's so sweet! 😭👍
My brother is 12 years older than our niece. He reacted the same way when she was born. He's been more of a father to her than the sperm donor, and they have an incredible bond.
"19 you can train em young" THE WAY I WAS TRYING TO REPLAY THE ONE BEFORE AND THEN HAD MY JAW DROPPED IN AN OPENED HORRORFIED LAUGH
He means groom
@@unicorn69 ik, groom in both senses too
It's a huge ick that he wants to train someone for a relationship at all, but getting them 'young' to make them lean more towards you or people like you is horrible
Did lemon drop whack that guy? Seriously someone should check on that guy to see if he mysteriously went missing or slipped off a ladder or something. That side eye look to the other brother just screamed “bring a shovel.”
*news anchor voice*: "found embedded in the buried body of the so-called 'nice guy' were shards of glass, one of which appears to be the stem of a martini glass."
Lmao, though the voice-mail is a trend that people are doing, it's not a real message
It is real, the dude went by the name of Dmitri the Lover. He went to jail, although I can't remember the charge atm.
Golden rule: we see nothing. Continue, lemon drop.
For those who don't know it's a message from the early 2000s where a swedish model was approached on the street by an early Internet era pickup artist who called himself Dimitri the Lover and for whatever reason she gave him her number, and then he proceeded to leave several increasingly unhinged voicemails that now get used constantly in different contexts.
The man formerly known as Dimitri the Lover is currently in prison for assault, on a woman ofc.
In October my husband had to leave for 5 days for a training course for his work. We have 4 children and at the time they were 6 and under (youngest 15 months). We all (kids and I) got sick with a pretty nasty cold and the baby wouldn’t sleep unless on top of me which means I wasn’t getting any sleep while also dealing with a sore throat and a nasty cough. When he got back he immediately took all four kids and made sure I got to sleep for an entire day with no interruptions and took care of everything and everyone for three days straight until I could breathe normally again. I can’t imagine having a partner that would do what that awful man in the last video did, his wife and kids deserve better.
Lisa should've yell about how much of an ass he is too. I bet he "promised" to watch the kids so that people will praise him for being a good dad 🙄
Honestly, that is absolutely the vibes I am getting from that story
She should have told them all he left her alone with the kids for two weeks... But they'd probably still call her lazy. Anyway, who just blatantly tells a mom to her face after overhearing a conversation like that, that's she's lazy? That had to be so stressful for her, oh my god.
Omg the stay at home mom dude.
“You can’t take a nap at a full time job, you can’t watch tv”.
You should meet some people
I know that actually can chill and watch tv on their night shift once their clients go to bed. Or watch it with the clients. It’s still a job. But it doesn’t mean you’re on a computer all day
I'm literally risking it for the biscuit here watching TH-cam while at work (overnight shift) with my boss in the other room while she blares songs from the 2000s lmao. But yeah seriously that guy clearly doesn't know shit.
I'm literally sat at work part way through a 12hr shift watching this video right now because there's a lull in what needs doing
I take a nap in the toilet. X,D
My spouse works from home with the TV on, and flex time means he can take a nap when he wants.
My oldest never let's me nap, not when I'm pregnant, and not when I've been up all night with him or a other child. I look like death because I never get sleep. If a woman is napping with children it is because they are up all night with babies and children that do not let them sleep. Absolutely deluded.
I work in a daycare. Thinking three kids under five years old will ever be well behaved and not have emotional breakdowns and fight every ten seconds in a new environment especially is absolutely laughable. Also you had a two week vacation but forced your wife to your family’s BBQ on the single day you said she could have off and still asked her to take care of the kids on her own and subjected her to the judgement of your family who will only every see your side because well you’re the family member not her. What a marvelous day that could’ve ever been my guy
"Strangling in a fit of weep" gets me everytime 😂
Would bet money it has happened tho...
Lol
@1:48 Carlo is ALWAYS a green flag 💚 🇮🇹
He’s the bestest ❤❤❤ Such a sweet guy!
He’s like a golden retriever in Italian form
Hes our king
He's so sweet 🥹💖
that last one actually pissed me off so much
The fact that 29 year old guy immediately ng to explaining himself shows he knows secretly he’s in the wrong
The wheezing sounds while running just make it so much better! 😂
"You never hear a person strangling someone in a fit of weep", followed by qeeping strangling took me out🤣
Carlo (Italian with the cheese) is quite literally the most wholesome guy I've ever seen. Y'all need to look up his videos with his wife, they're the cutest and he's so sweet, his wife is amazing too. I absolutely love their dynamic, goofing around and just enjoying each other so much. When I need my faith in relationships restored, I watch them.
I grew up with 5 other siblings in the house. That’s 6 kids- all the way from toddlers to adults. Needless to say- being a stay at home parent is NOT a full-time vacation. It’s stressful, it really is. You’ve got to maintain the house, making sure a kid isn’t getting killed, figuring out how to feed them everyday, watching over them 24/7 until they learn independency, and more!
I honestly don’t know how my mom didn’t just toss us all in a truck and abandon us on the side of the road, but after all she's done for me and my sisters and brothers, I applaud her.
Wow
'For once'
Two words that will end any kind of relationship
we all love carlo, he’s the best man in existence
What a great fella!
He's a whole walking green flag himself 🥺 world really needs more of precious people (especially men) like that.
For the anger guy, anger is a secondary emotion anyways. So he’s probably actually sad, just can’t express it healthily or properly
Anger is one of our 6 basic emotions, alongside sadness, happiness, fear, surprise and disgust. All of these can then be further narrowed down in steps between 4 - 8 of which most in turn can be divided into two different ones. So you have a final composition of about 70 emotions or emotional states.
Source: Several years of therapy including intense DBT therapy.
EDIT: To clarify, I'm not defending what the guy said, I still think it's wrong. But we shouldn't think it's wrong due to something false, there are more than enough proper red flags there.
Always felt reductive to claim anger is a secondary or unreal emotion. Anger is just the active, dynamic realization that "Hey this doesn't feel right, I shouldn't be treated like this." It wears no masks, it's authentic to a fault. Anger stems from people and their experiences, just like all emotions.
Dustin, I can't even tell you how much I love and appreciate your thoughts on the videos you have found.
Red or green - you are pure Gold!
Imagine if this guy has neighbors…
Neighbor’s wife: HANK! HE’S DOING IT AGAIN!
this guy: *running around with red and green flags in the forest*
Hank: damn, I should start running too
Hank: That boy ain't right.
I was a stay-at-home mom for four years, this after working full-time full-time for 14 years.
Two kids, born two years apart. I want to hear anyone who has *personally* experienced feeding and caring for babies/toddlers, while grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning, and cooking tell me that this isn't equal to working a 40 hour a week job.
("Oh sorry, baby! Your diaper's fucky? I'll get back to you at 9am tomorrow morning. Or try to call in your dad.")
You're never off the clock or not on call. It qualifies at least as 80 hours.
I know the guy at 6:46 and GUYS let me tell you-- he is JUST like that in real life. He's an amazing singer and the sweetest guy with an amazing testimony. I got so surprised when I stumbled over this video and he was in it lol 😆
You just described someone with two jobs 😂😂
He was not wrong.
8:30 dude doesn't understand the power of a good hug and cry.
Nate reminds me of my brother when he met my daughter for the first time, it's so wholesome I wish I got ours on video ❤
0:40 orange you glad you married the right guy
Green flags are always the apPEAL in a spouse 👍✨
2:15 His little look of confusion when she said that was already a lot of cheese.... No, ma'am. That was one very modest and restrained Italian right there. He tried his best to keep it small.
Thanks for pointing out the dives we have to do in a day as SAHP! The number of dislocations I’ve endured to save my kids because they figured out the safety equipment and were very determined to find all the “cool” things beyond the gates and covers and locks….. INSANE ingenuity of small minds.
❤❤❤ I absolutely *LOVE* this!!!! Keep doing this!!!!
For people that didn't have the luxury of growing up with healthy boundaries and got normalized to toxicity, this is priceless and more valuable than one would ever know!!! And for all those that were blessed, it's a reminder to stay on track and not lose focus or get influenced in this (often times very toxic) world!!!
On top of that the commentary is pure GOLD and the descriptions are very accurate!!
First time on your channel, gladd I've found you!!!😊😊
10;48 '''dont start a scene', you directed the scene'' is so good and im gonna start using it whenever i stand/speak up for myself and get told this thank you 🥺
The cheese guy 😍😍 that sweet innocent look when she said I told you not to do that. 😢🥰🥰🥰
2:23 You can see his brain completely lock up. He can’t even process the idea that he wouldn’t bring things home for her.
The fact that the last guy asked the question so openly and honestly means, he truly doesn't realize what he had done
That side eye between the brothers (or brother and other dude) is perfect, it gives "yo, do we need to go hide a body?"
Everything about Dustin's videos is great, but I especially appreciated him talking about how being a stay-at-home parent is a job. If you were working for someone else, you'd be paying for childcare. Which is obviously that person's job. Just because you don't get a paycheck for being at home caring for you kids doesn't make it any easier or less important than a "normal" job
It is most definitely a job. I babysit my nephew quite a bit and he is a combination of Taz (Looney Tunes) and the Energizer Bunny. Love him, but I can honestly say I am relieved to go back to my job. I work a grueling job as a chef, yet it suddenly seems so much easier than before after one day keeping tabs on him.
My husband is a SAHD; he's thinking about going back to work now that kiddo is going to school fulltime, but never have I thought he was sitting on his ass doing nothing; our kid was his primary job.
For once needed the response: "I will make that a reality or you can very VERY kindly walk that statement back to this group of people you just shouted that egregious lie in front of. Your choice. Thinking I'd start with 2 weeks in Hawaii." These men need to get a clue. I don't have kids, but I'd never be so disrespectful to my partner (nor he to me), there was so much wrong with that entire scenario. SO MUCH.
"Believe it or not, I'm a complete catch" 😂😂 I am going to go with NOT 🚩
6:15 yes you can't take a nap or watch TV at a full time job. Neither can most stay at home moms. But someone with a job outside of the house gets to clock out and leave at 5 o'clock. Stay at home parents NEVER leave work. We are at work 24/7. We don't have an 8 hour day! We are up changing diapers and feeding at 2am, getting kids dressed at 6am, feeding kids at 7 drive kids to school at 8, cleaning the house & do laundry all day, pick up kids at 3pm, do homework at 4pm, making dinner at 5pm, baths at 8pm and bedtime at 9pm (then play bedtime rodeo for 30-60 minutes) & hopefully go to bed before midnight... To then start it all over again the next day. Doing all that we also have to kiss boo boos, be a referee, be a counselor, be a teacher, etc and try to keep up with our own hygiene and mental health. But ya going to work is much harder.
If you're sad, you're sad, you don’t want to angry scream, it's not the same as being angry or frustrated.
AWWW, the fellow meeting his wee niece for the first time is so adorable. I actually quite like these videos that contrast red and green flags!
"angry blow up" means you needed a good cry but denied yourself so now your emotions become everyone else's problem in the worst way
So a little known fact about testosterone is typical male levels suppress tear response. Men can be just as sad as women but still not be able to cry. I can see how men might decide that anger is the easier response when that can come with a physical release when crying isn’t available- and they’re already encouraged to view anger as masculine and sadness as feminine. Anger also does not have to be anyone else’s problem- If I’m alone in the wood and I yell and kick some sticks around I’m not hurting anyone. The important distinction is who or what that anger is directed towards and shown to. Anger is not a bad emotion, it’s just an emotion. Your *handling* of it is what determines how big a problem it is. Though if you are genuinely *choosing* to react with anger instead of sadness that’s a classic case of anger as a secondary emotion and the primary emotion, the sadness, will still be there after you’re done being angry.
The brother with the creep phonecall reminded me of this time in high school. I think this was when I was a soph or junior. A friend had a creep get a little too pushy for affection. So just cue a little later their chad of a senior big brother coming in during lunch. Still in his jammies and slippers because he didn't have class at that hour so bro was getting to sleep in. I'll just never forget that older brother not giving a good goddang how he looked. Bro had a little sister to protect.
I've just stumbled onto your channel today, and you've already got me hooked! Everything you say seems so off the cuff, yet fits so perfectly 😂
hey thank you!! that means a lot 😀
0:00 so, they're upset about having a daughter? THAT disappointed!? I mean, it's still your child... boy or girl, you should grateful either way. It's rather disgusting actually to see such misogyny towards your own unborn child... especially coming from her MOTHER of all people. Just imagine if your parents reacted that way towards you. If you're so unhappy, find a state that still allows abortions and abort... or get over it.
It is a pretty gross reaction, especially caught on camera for their kids to someday find. However, sometimes people just need to be given the time to let go of whatever preconceived notions they had for their children’s lives.
My own grandmother told me she threw an immature fit when she found out I was a girl. She wanted her first grandchild to be a boy, as she had raised three of her own and loved mothering them. She refused to see me the first day after my birth. But when she gave in and went to see me, she fell for me the moment we locked eyes. We went on to have an incredible relationship I will cherish forever. I can only hope the same thing happens for the family in that first clip.
Some women don't want daughters because they don't want another female to compete against for their partner's affection. Yeah, I know. Fucking toxic as heck. Poor kid is going to have so much trauma....
2:09 I NEED A PARTNER LIKE THIS, CHEESE IS MY LIFE
Your speech about parenting was spot on. You paid attention to your maternal figures and it shows. ❤
I’m dying every time he says something like “I’m as angry as a zebra scanning a barcode” 🤣🤣🤣
To the guy who says you can’t watch tv at work, or take naps. …. Do you not have a lunch period at work? Do you not take breaks? Granted some jobs don’t have those things, but most do. I live close enough to home I stop by every lunch, heck sometimes I take a quick nap!
Yeah I'm the breadwinner in the fam, and that dude is full of shit. Being a parent doesn't fucking stop; I fully admit that there are times where I go into the office not because i have to, but because I get a break from the high-energy adorable needy munchkin called my child. People who call SAHP parents are absolute bullshitters; I did not envy my husband when our kid was toddling and he was staying at home.
Dustin, I'm concerned about your lungs, sometimes you make asthma noises when you run.
7:21 😂😂
Oh my god... Haha
@@valeriepavlistikova9132sounds like a bear 😹
he got dustin them
@@galaxygamer14568XDDDDD
4:50 27 is not the expiration date on women, I know 50 year olds that are still menstruating, my mom has gotten pregnant well past 40 wtf is this dude on?
If I had to guess he’s on MRA garbage groups.
I follow Carlo (Italian cheese guy) and his wife on IG and he is the greenest of green flags. Just a forest of a man
6:30 literally. No kids here, but I’ve worked at daycares for 2 years. I didn’t even need a day on the job to experience firsthand how difficult and stressful it is to look after children (especially at that age when they can’t do very much for themselves).
i love that Carlo is in here, and he's a green flag. he is literally the sweetest!
I CANNOT tell you just how much I respect you! I as a stay at home mom. If a Kindergartener... was just hospitalized for stress. Anyone , man or woman. Whoever stays at home is working NONSTOP. IT DOESN'T STOP. Thank you for this content. I love y'all, sir, and your girl are amazing. ❤
4:04 Ohmygosh he said the quiet part out loud
7:48
I will never forget how one time when I got really angry I grabbed a bat and hit my desk three times. I remmeber fuming and breathing and for a few seconds I felt ok, but then I relised what I had done. This was the desk my father got me to help me during the pandemic, the desk I went to get with him, and most importantly, I didn't feel better. I don't have that desk anymore but I will never forget that memory. It taught me that anger isn't a substitute to processing emotions, you can only process them through thought and conversation. I also learned that acting through aggression won't solve anything, if anything it makes things worse and makes me feel worse.
So I cry, I cry a lot and I'm not always mentally ok but I feel much better afterwords then if I did something through aggression.
When your man literally says they are training you. Get tf out
Man so glad that my dad is a psychologist. Calm and reasonable at all times. Willing to talk to anyone at any age as an equal.
As a kid he helped me work through letting go of a childhood blanket. Took me outside the night he took it away and we watched the stars together while I calmed down.
All you guys and gals out there be that person to your kid!
That´s cute but why did you have to let got of your childhood blanket?
Carlos is a walking green flag. I adore him!
8:40, I needed to hear this guy get made fun of. My dad and I live together and we are grieving my grandmother, his mom, as of last week. My whole life my dad has had a temper that’s sloooowly gotten better. While we’re both going though it, my dad has flown off the handle more than a few times. It triggers my fight or flights real bad when he gets loud and mean. He just takes his bad feelings out on me. As his kid I’m highly attuned to his feelings and trying to predict or prevent an outburst. I learned to cry (I am his daughter), but I also learned I MYSELF am not allowed anger. If I ever stand up for myself I run the risk of him yelling at me more, but I would be finally dealing with it the ‘man’ way. Instead of caretaking constantly and people pleasing to folks who don’t care what my PTSD is doing to me in that moment. I love my dad. But I’m so tired of my nerves being frazzled constantly. He calls me names and yells at me and then gives some shitty excuse.
Hearing the guy in the video talk about how men HAVE to express it that way gave me a knot in my stomach; but then it got the red flag and all at once you helped remind me his explosive, poorly regulated behavior is not my fault and burden for the rest of my adult life. So yeah. Needed to see this today!
I am so sorry and I felt every word you said! Because I clam up and shut things up inside tears and anger because either response will cause a reaction I just cant deal with on top of the already tense situation. My father was physically and mentally abusive never any excuse other than I am just a girl wtf do I know???? That I am stupid (mind you have 4 degrees and over 120+ IQ) Have figured out complex issues for him but will never get past I am a girl and will be forever less than human to him. But who I comes from G-d's word not humans. I pray you find true healing and peace from deep inside
This is my first time checking your video. And seeing a person running around with a red and green flag is hilarious 😂❤love your video
Thank you!!
I keep switching between upset and happy 😂 watching a red flag clip, then a green one
We all need a guy running in the wood with comically large flags in our life
I love how man explaining stay-at-home-mom is not a job, but when you take in consideration that children, a partner and possible pets come with responsibilities that are given to stay-at-home-mom (or dad in regards who wishes to be the breadwinner).
Think of the laundry, you need to essentially laundry almost every day. You need to sort and know who's clothes is who's. Imagine this without a laundry machine, imagine going every day to a laundryroom or other facility in city every morning.
You need to clean the mess children put up. You need to also teach children mostly alone about morals and what to do or not do.
You need to wash dishes every day. Depending maybe every two days. You need to make sure you have enough clean dishes to use. Imagine this without dishwasher in 4-5 person household.
You need to cook every day, because homecooking is least expensive way economically. You also have to teach young children how to eat properly and learn about balanced diet to keep children healthy and not getting sick.
You have to tend the children, if they're sick.
You have to make sure children don't eat sweets excessively or outside the 'candy saturday' or something.
Also, you need to clean the house to keep it organized and safe space for children to roam.
You need to attend with children, should they request guidance with studies.
You need to make sure they do their homework, and not play games too long. Also give them something fun to do outside like pokemon GO or some other outdoor activity that could give children a chance for dopamine rush.
You need to make them breakfast and something to eat before bed. Depending how old the child is, they will eventually learn from their parent how to do it.
Also, you need to teach child over time how to do these daily things you do, since it is their way to learn independence as they age.
Sure, you don't get paid for it. However doing all this at home is good enough experience to do various caretaker jobs, which stay-at-home-mothers would find good use of once their kids grow up, or their husband leaves them abruptly.
"Guys my age are not mature enough"
The guy you're dating is going through his very own awkward teenage phase.
0:06
that sounds like a family of boy mothers.. at least the dad was happy to have a kid
Carlo is a beautiful man and always makes her happy. Everyone needs a Carlo, even as a friend in their life.
My mom was a stay at home mom and my stepdad may as well have been absent. My mom's disabled and my sister is bipolar, and we're all neurodivergent. Being a stay at home mom is not easy. It's hard, and sometimes you mess up.
HIS FACE, THIS MAN. ✨ A D O R A B L E ✨ 2:24
When someone sends the 😳 emoji, that’s what I imagine
The guy with the little baby omg so wholesome love it
Imagine you’re taking a walk through the local park and you see this maniac running around with flags and clicking his heels
6:09 this guy had me pissed off. Like 4 months? Try 12 , try no paychecks and tax returns. Try 7 straight years of not being able to socialize with adults and only being good with kids now. Stay at home moms have a job that is rough and a blessing all at once.
10:25
"AAAH!" Such inspiring words
I wish I had these red and green flag videos when I was young, but I am sure glad my child has access to see them. I do NOT want my child repeating a cycle we didn't know we were in. ❤❤❤❤
I'm dead for the guy with the cheese. "There's no cheese over there." "I brought cheese, but not a lot of cheese," pulls out like 5kg of cheese. "I told you not to do that" looks at her like she just broke up with him. 😂😂😂
What you’re doing here is honestly the most attractive thing I’ve seen a man do in a very long time haha
Thank you💚
I had a friend in highschool who offered me his sweatshirt because I was feeling insecure about my body that day. I still remember this gesture to this day. It was very meaningful to me
I'm sorry but I don't care who you are, I ain't giving you my phone password. Not because I'm disloyal or untrustworthy, but because I'm a huge nerd who draws digital fanart (and just draws in general) and reads fanfiction. Simple as that. It's the same kind of anxiety of someone flipping through an artist's sketchbook without permission. Just no.
If my husband can't get into my phone, then how can I get him to check things for me when it's too far away to reach? On the flip side, I know his pass- pattern, but I never get it right, so I always have to make him open it for me and it drives him crazy that I can't do it myself.
This is really not the same thing, and I'm telling you this as a person with anxiety who also reads fanfiction and draws fanart and other 'cringe' shit. And you shouldn't be dating someone who'd judge you for that anyways
Why would you date someone for 2 years if you feel shame & fear ridicule for your passions? Thats a sign of an issue too.
I feel this. I have nothing to hide, but my phone is a part of my space. I wouldn't want my husband riffling through my wallet for no reason. It's just... Snoopy. And not in a fun cartoon beagle kind of way.
I take naps in the middle of the day and I work a full time job. It's called a break and I decide what to do with my time while I'm on it.