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yeah just thing of what the worst can happen and dont fear because death is a part of human which is the truth only truth which really a truth no body can disagree. let yourself go. i am sure good person inside you wont do anything wrong.
0:57 Realize that this strategy does not work 5:00 Be realistic about what you’re after 10:22 Learn how to give yourself what you think it will give you
Neediness is basically addiction in disguise. It all comes from the same place, which is place of lack and resistance. Questioning why this feeling is there is crucial, and realizing that there is no end to this drug is even more important. Another amazing video Julien, keep it up
*No matter how many people like you and your work, it doesn’t matter if you don’t like yourself.* I've realized this in my own life 100% because I've always tried to please people, so that I would be liked. That shit does nothing, you're compromising your SELF for someone else. It's mental if we think about it well...
I too realized this recently, I've even felt like my "friends" take notice of how I try to be on people's good side and take advantage of it smh. Worst part is I've cut someone off like that before but it seems like I never fucking learned from that.
@@truth294 Yeah, very recognizable man! But don'tbe too hard on yourself, almost everyone does this to some degree. What helps for me is lowering my social media use and having a project that youcan invest all your time in. For me that is my channel and movement 'bemindfool'. That way, there is almost no time to think about other stuff + it feels almost like my time is 'reserved' a lot so I'm way more selective in when I go out etc. My friends feel that and it's kind of like a 'power position' .. weird to explain but it's going well! All the best Petr
@@kiteoma thanks man! hope your channel blows up soon. Im gonna try to keep as busy as possible, the long hours at work used to keep me busy but it started becoming routine.
Been following Julien and RSD ever since Neil Strauss's "The Game". I find it fascinating that over their many years of teaching men success with women they discovered that so many people have deeply rooted problems which go far beyond attracting women and that these problems revolve around one's deepest sense of self-worth and image, which affects how one relates to people in general and not just women. In trying to help men get better with girls, they found that many are broken and stifled from social conditioning or past traumas, and that one really has to go through their own process of healing or "finding their truth" before even considering entering into any kind of relationship.
Most of this vid I completely agree with. And I like your energy and directness. Love is taking something as a part of yourself, by definition. This is why it is inherently a risk to truly love another person. What you described is attachment. The desire to build a family requires a balanced partner. Requires taking your partner as yourself for a long period of time. Requires 24/7 commitment like nothing else. Relationships are different.
1. If you are naturally needy, then be that. Be who you are. No reason to change. Someone out there absolutely needs you to be yourself because thats who they will fall in love with. Remember, you dont need to get EVERY girl, just the one that will love you. By default trying to change who you are is an insecurity. Trying to hide who you are is an insecurity. Rather, embrace who you are. Soak and saturate. Realize that soneone out there is totally going to dig it. You just gotta go find them...
This is similar to the message of Reality Transurfing. If you put so much effort and energy into getting something, it actually makes an imbalance in the universe because of the attention you're giving you. Trust it'll happen, but in the work, and just know it'll come
Still, there are things we cannot give to ourselves. But often times we want to get our needs met by the wrong people. Taking people off the pedestal and putting yourself first surely is the best first step.
you sound like you were bullied as a kid, i was too when i was young and new to the country. im grateful you were able to grow over the past by focusing on a successful future. keep doing you bro x
I don't agree with the money part. Money gives you the freedom to be yourself. I am about to get financial freedom, will be able to leave my fkin 9/6 job, and will be able to finally invest in myself, create my own business's which will be the way of expressing what I really am. My job is not what am, I'm just working because i need to pay bills and survive. Money is actually one of the most important things in the world, so yes, don't be needy towards it, but be aware that's VERY important
Man, that's just HUGE... Powerful, eye-openning and just life changing... Thank you for the emotion and wisdom... Will apply and fill my own "holes" Myself not by sucking to another person... And then I can really love
I love how your advice isnt at all congruent with typical PUA advice. Your advice is more philosophical and more on creating internal peace and happiness and challenging our inner belief systems.
And through creating more piece and comfort within ourselves we will not need or chase whatever we thought we needed all along but rather it will come into our lives in a state of nirvana.
the process of change your emotions every second is so hard. what he is saying great. what i do i face pokey feelings and relax and close eyes focus on that subject and topic and imagine other personality and find the solution of that pokey feeling and try resolve the problem after getting answer what i get is relaxed empty heart and soul which makes me happy and calm because if i cant get any solution i just think what could go worst of all. death i agree i can die now take me. these all things kind of make me brave and let me live life but the thing is remember memory have get a atleast 30 seconds to remember all this before worst situtation because bad pokey feeling can come any time
You’ve really taken a 180 and can see you’ve explored a lot of spiritual texts eckhart tolle and works alike.. my question to you is if you are able to identify patterns of insecurity that no longer serve you but still trigger you Joe do you release this so it no longer has power over you? Despite all my efforts and spiritual pursuits I’ve struggled to let that go... I think it comes down to self acceptance, fear and self love related issues. What did you do to get to a more “whole” place? Thanks Julien!
What about for someone, who always used to approach and had the excitement to do it, but years later you realise deep down, women don't bring you happiness and really they can often be a pain. So even going to bars and chatting to them can seem less interesting because you're not even that bothered about a same night bang anymore. You still wouldn't mind a girlfriend and it be a girl who really likes you for you, who you also really click with, but for anything else that isn't that, you know it's nothing life changing or happiness for ever, so then it's just your ego left, which is seeing other guys you're with approach and who get girls and loads of numbers and pulling, because really they are young and think it will bring them happiness or they never did it when they was young and so are now just lost and mad on women. So it's like you want a meaningful relation,ship but you don't need it but you also have your ego, that might only approach girls because other guys are doing it? But at the same time you would like someone to live life with, because what else is there in life to do? It's also ego, people judging you for what you have or don't have and the time is ticking by and you think i don't need anything but then society is all about relationships, jobs, cars and property and doing fun stuff but really none of it is life changing but what do you spend your time doing if you don't even feel the motivation so much.
I feel like you're making game the center of your life, bro you sound unfulfilled, like you're begging game to give your life meaning. If you expect to feel disappointed you will, just try and have fun, do shit cause you want the results.
@@Knx3k far from it. I don't call it game. I prefer to go out and socialise and talk to people and in process chat to women. I don't call it game and to me it's just about having a good social life and it being regular through that I meet more people
Julian! This vid is really fkg helpful! Your work, your knowledge, your free spirit is really great! Words can't descripe the value of the deep inner work you share with us, the world, the individual, the truth. Thank you very much 😎🌳🐒🤩🥕🥦🌽
Thanks Julian. I have to admit though, this weekend I went out and was in a very needy state, and did some shameful things.. I'm fresh out of a breakup and though I should go out but I guess I'm not ready
Fortunately I'm flirting with a girl who also likes punk music :D Great video dude, I just found your channel this morning and I think you've already become my favourite speaker, I also love to give speeches so you are also helping me a lot on that stuff.
well no girlfriend can lead to missing out on a few things: no one to talk to share and do plans in life, less oxytocin from hugs, cuddle, less sex and more porn, less pride in yourself for being attractive, less confort with other guyz who will constantly tell u they fucked a hot girl, less relaxation and peace of mind you dont have always be attractive and find someone, less household task you have to do by yourself or even pay by yourself (so less stress nowadays), less your parents being ashamed you are a loozer and feeling u missed your life overall and others are succeeding more easily than u , like there was something wrong in you..and perhaps more missings..Man were created to go out with Woman , so if you do not have a woman well you kind of failed the purpose of the creation of life and its evolution..
I never had a girlfriend until I let one girl realize I wanted to be around her. Women love both attention and affection. They can't handle even the slightest hint of disinterest.
That one is really tricky. Here’s how I think about it: It’s okay to have that’s need, but you have to act (and feel, as far as possible) that it’s already covered, which will in turn make it come to you.
Doragonz what about the countless studies coming out proving one of the biggest factor to our over all satisfaction in life is a mate, sense of community and friendships ?
Want my direct help to change your life trajectory and reach your FULL potential?
👉 Fill out this application right now, and see if you're a good fit: bit.ly/2S9YVum
🙏 Get a FREE guided meditation (How to let go of fear & anxiety): bit.ly/2JIkFJU
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Showed this to my dog... Now he's an independent cat. Thx -.-
Winning!
@@badhabitz69 We need to bring back the internet trophies, Herzog won with this one. :)
Showed this to my Nan and she won't feed me anymore
Maybe it was always an cat you just never knew
I showed this to my brother, now he a strong independent woman.
Sometimes the best thing to do is have patience, do nothing.
But concentrate on oneself.
One World Yoga 🧘♀️ yes , self care love your new beginning good things will come .
Agree , there is one underlying truth binding us all. the nothingness sets us free🙃.
On point !!
yeah just thing of what the worst can happen and dont fear because death is a part of human which is the truth only truth which really a truth no body can disagree. let yourself go. i am sure good person inside you wont do anything wrong.
Do nothing is women beta energy. Unless you are a women then have at it
0:57 Realize that this strategy does not work
5:00 Be realistic about what you’re after
10:22 Learn how to give yourself what you think it will give you
JulienHimself thanks Julien! I’ve been following you since like 2010. Been a great help man
10:22 Great point, Diogenes figured the same 🙏👌💯
Neediness is basically addiction in disguise. It all comes from the same place, which is place of lack and resistance. Questioning why this feeling is there is crucial, and realizing that there is no end to this drug is even more important.
Another amazing video Julien, keep it up
Well put, thank you
True, but it's Amazing, julien actually funny just as cool
"Deglorifying what you need" - genius!
Julien? What do we have to do to get you and Owen on the Joe Rogan Experience?
Boon my dream
Somebody, get this man up the comments
Fuck yes!!
Fuck yeah!
we have to just comment that question on alll of their videos on youtub and i think i might happen sooner or later!
LETS DO THIS!
The girl that chases you is the the girl that likes you. Not every girl will chase you too-so be comfortable making yourself the best version of YOU
Damn some of this really resonated with me. I've been pushing people away because I'm scared of being too comfortable
*No matter how many people like you and your work, it doesn’t matter if you don’t like yourself.* I've realized this in my own life 100% because I've always tried to please people, so that I would be liked. That shit does nothing, you're compromising your SELF for someone else. It's mental if we think about it well...
I too realized this recently, I've even felt like my "friends" take notice of how I try to be on people's good side and take advantage of it smh. Worst part is I've cut someone off like that before but it seems like I never fucking learned from that.
@@truth294 Yeah, very recognizable man! But don'tbe too hard on yourself, almost everyone does this to some degree. What helps for me is lowering my social media use and having a project that youcan invest all your time in. For me that is my channel and movement 'bemindfool'. That way, there is almost no time to think about other stuff + it feels almost like my time is 'reserved' a lot so I'm way more selective in when I go out etc. My friends feel that and it's kind of like a 'power position' .. weird to explain but it's going well! All the best Petr
@@kiteoma thanks man! hope your channel blows up soon. Im gonna try to keep as busy as possible, the long hours at work used to keep me busy but it started becoming routine.
@@truth294 thank you bro! Feel free to subscribe :D and yeah busy is good but preferably something you're passionate about! Peace
@@kiteoma The magnitude enigma of self hatred can be a very deep thing, I am just speaking for myself.
Been following Julien and RSD ever since Neil Strauss's "The Game". I find it fascinating that over their many years of teaching men success with women they discovered that so many people have deeply rooted problems which go far beyond attracting women and that these problems revolve around one's deepest sense of self-worth and image, which affects how one relates to people in general and not just women. In trying to help men get better with girls, they found that many are broken and stifled from social conditioning or past traumas, and that one really has to go through their own process of healing or "finding their truth" before even considering entering into any kind of relationship.
That's so true. Huge journey arc of RSD which has moved a long way from the shallowness and unauthentic pick-up world
Most of this vid I completely agree with.
And I like your energy and directness.
Love is taking something as a part of yourself, by definition. This is why it is inherently a risk to truly love another person.
What you described is attachment.
The desire to build a family requires a balanced partner. Requires taking your partner as yourself for a long period of time. Requires 24/7 commitment like nothing else.
Relationships are different.
YOU have such a good timing... Even if I didn't watch it now, it feels like you heard me
I love you Julien... as a Mom
Yeah A )4w mom.
1. If you are naturally needy, then be that. Be who you are. No reason to change. Someone out there absolutely needs you to be yourself because thats who they will fall in love with. Remember, you dont need to get EVERY girl, just the one that will love you. By default trying to change who you are is an insecurity. Trying to hide who you are is an insecurity. Rather, embrace who you are. Soak and saturate. Realize that soneone out there is totally going to dig it. You just gotta go find them...
You're right you'll find someone who likes you as you are but it's also right you'll have a toxic relationship
Neediness isn’t who a person is.
Neediness is a state of excessive desire due to one’s own insecurity.
act real until you remember...
nobody is too needy by default
This is similar to the message of Reality Transurfing. If you put so much effort and energy into getting something, it actually makes an imbalance in the universe because of the attention you're giving you.
Trust it'll happen, but in the work, and just know it'll come
Dude your name, and what you're saying.. It's topics that recently entered my mind and life :o
@@St.jonnie It's fate :O
Very true
🤨 wtf
Still, there are things we cannot give to ourselves. But often times we want to get our needs met by the wrong people.
Taking people off the pedestal and putting yourself first surely is the best first step.
"Money just gives you access to more ways to numb yourself"... I just understood the reason why i'm chasing money
you sound like you were bullied as a kid, i was too when i was young and new to the country. im grateful you were able to grow over the past by focusing on a successful future. keep doing you bro x
I always get put in a good mood when I come to your videos for advice 😊
Treat them mean, keep them keen. It works, what doesn’t is neediness.
Why do we think that we are not enough? Instead of looking for someone else to complete us, we need to become complete ourselves.
Yes!
Those glasses are so dope. Thanks Julien, you changed my life in the past years.
That's awesome!!! Congrats! 🔥👊
He sees life through pink glasses, is a dutch saying for ,he looks at the bright side of life...
Father J ,thank you very much for English subtitle. It's a huge help. So much respect.
You're welcome!! 👊
@@JulienHimself You literally changed my life. Without you, I wouldn't be here. Big Love
LOVE your delivery, passion, HONESTY, seemingly genuine. I'm really excited now! Lol, I'm a dork. 🙋☺️😁
Dude, have you written any books?? I'll freaking buy your books... Nice job
I don't agree with the money part. Money gives you the freedom to be yourself. I am about to get financial freedom, will be able to leave my fkin 9/6 job, and will be able to finally invest in myself, create my own business's which will be the way of expressing what I really am. My job is not what am, I'm just working because i need to pay bills and survive. Money is actually one of the most important things in the world, so yes, don't be needy towards it, but be aware that's VERY important
He doesn't say that it's not important. But clinging on how you need the money so much will rather tear you apart than getting more money.
Social safety net is freedom for all
These few minutes felt like years of knowledge, great video Julien👏
Thanks for watching!!
Man, that's just HUGE... Powerful, eye-openning and just life changing... Thank you for the emotion and wisdom...
Will apply and fill my own "holes" Myself not by sucking to another person... And then I can really love
Nice! Glad this was so helpful! 🙏
I'm just in the forest, far from civilization, where they don’t even know what a pickup is, and watch Julien.
Awesome! You're ahead of your surroundings bro. Keep growing :D
That is Epic,Thug Life
y
Julien, I don't have brother's but I feel like you're my big bro. Thank you for real. 🇧🇷🙏🏾
Letting it go makes me react to things i stay silent normally i fear ending up with a different me
i love how this guy has continued to evolve haha...
true : the more u need, the more u gonna push it away from you
false : the more u need, the more chance u gonna get it
i need to memorize this?
what
It’s like Dark Julien and self help Julien fused into one...
He is no longer father J..
HE IS ULTIMATE SUPER SAIYAN GOD JULIEN
Been a while since watching this. The explicit analogies are next level 😂
Lol 🙈
Keep hitting up with stuff like that, the content is great!
Thanks!! 🙏
Man your videos just complete me. without them I would be nothing thx…
jostorrs like you do by calling him fool?
@@adunnou2075 this ain’t it chief
Julien's delivery is the best, truths and funnies. Like how you won the game of Life 😂😂
🙏🙏🙏
this is one of the best videos
Glad it was helpful! What was your favorite part btw?
This is fkn GOLD, i love it, i love it, i love it!!
For years I have been living in this needy life , after this video It's tym to change well my Transformation... thanks Julien
That's cool man!
Thanks julien you are right in so many ways Im moving forward
I love how your advice isnt at all congruent with typical PUA advice. Your advice is more philosophical and more on creating internal peace and happiness and challenging our inner belief systems.
And through creating more piece and comfort within ourselves we will not need or chase whatever we thought we needed all along but rather it will come into our lives in a state of nirvana.
Glad this resonates! 🙏
My problem is anxiety makes me look needy
the process of change your emotions every second is so hard. what he is saying great. what i do i face pokey feelings and relax and close eyes focus on that subject and topic and imagine other personality and find the solution of that pokey feeling and try resolve the problem after getting answer what i get is relaxed empty heart and soul which makes me happy and calm because if i cant get any solution i just think what could go worst of all. death i agree i can die now take me. these all things kind of make me brave and let me live life but the thing is remember memory have get a atleast 30 seconds to remember all this before worst situtation because bad pokey feeling can come any time
How do I give myself physical affection? How do I cuddle myself? Give myself 8 hugs per day?
Litterally feel like you're a spirit brethren. Appreciate you being Julien. Fr
🙏
thank you brother
You're welcome!
Amazing content. Thank you. You guys are saving and changing lives. Epic analogy story too so funny. 🦈✌️
Is enthusiasm being needy? This is a deep sticking point of mine
►►► START YOUR TRANSFORMATION NOW: transformationmasteryacademy.com
I am your fan from Russia
i felt every word bro keep up the great work
You’ve really taken a 180 and can see you’ve explored a lot of spiritual texts eckhart tolle and works alike.. my question to you is if you are able to identify patterns of insecurity that no longer serve you but still trigger you Joe do you release this so it no longer has power over you? Despite all my efforts and spiritual pursuits I’ve struggled to let that go... I think it comes down to self acceptance, fear and self love related issues. What did you do to get to a more “whole” place?
Thanks Julien!
What about for someone, who always used to approach and had the excitement to do it, but years later you realise deep down, women don't bring you happiness and really they can often be a pain. So even going to bars and chatting to them can seem less interesting because you're not even that bothered about a same night bang anymore. You still wouldn't mind a girlfriend and it be a girl who really likes you for you, who you also really click with, but for anything else that isn't that, you know it's nothing life changing or happiness for ever, so then it's just your ego left, which is seeing other guys you're with approach and who get girls and loads of numbers and pulling, because really they are young and think it will bring them happiness or they never did it when they was young and so are now just lost and mad on women. So it's like you want a meaningful relation,ship but you don't need it but you also have your ego, that might only approach girls because other guys are doing it? But at the same time you would like someone to live life with, because what else is there in life to do? It's also ego, people judging you for what you have or don't have and the time is ticking by and you think i don't need anything but then society is all about relationships, jobs, cars and property and doing fun stuff but really none of it is life changing but what do you spend your time doing if you don't even feel the motivation so much.
I feel like you're making game the center of your life, bro you sound unfulfilled, like you're begging game to give your life meaning. If you expect to feel disappointed you will, just try and have fun, do shit cause you want the results.
@@Knx3k far from it. I don't call it game. I prefer to go out and socialise and talk to people and in process chat to women. I don't call it game and to me it's just about having a good social life and it being regular through that I meet more people
@@deanVodkahouse idk bro, I never heard of nobody who knows game sounding so depressed after trying it for more than a month
I love that most are male here, in all of Julienne videos. Everyone need this
i don't know, but this dude talks like tony stark (Ironman) in Avengers.
Yeah
And has the look
Lol every video Julian been looking more and more like he’s on that stuff in these into clips lmao
Julian! This vid is really fkg helpful! Your work, your knowledge, your free spirit is really great! Words can't descripe the value of the deep inner work you share with us, the world, the individual, the truth. Thank you very much 😎🌳🐒🤩🥕🥦🌽
Thank you! And thanks for watching!! 🙏
Julien should become a stand up comedian for real lol
Thanks Julian. I have to admit though, this weekend I went out and was in a very needy state, and did some shameful things.. I'm fresh out of a breakup and though I should go out but I guess I'm not ready
Pure Gold during Quarantine!
Alright i learned much, but how do I give myself the feeling of affection?
Hey Julien thanks for the video
Thx for watching! 🙏
Fortunately I'm flirting with a girl who also likes punk music :D
Great video dude, I just found your channel this morning and I think you've already become my favourite speaker, I also love to give speeches so you are also helping me a lot on that stuff.
I like the way Julien delivers. U the man bro.
Great video!
Thanks!
Awesome video! Thank you for teaching RSD! You guys changed my life so much!
well no girlfriend can lead to missing out on a few things: no one to talk to share and do plans in life, less oxytocin from hugs, cuddle, less sex and more porn, less pride in yourself for being attractive, less confort with other guyz who will constantly tell u they fucked a hot girl, less relaxation and peace of mind you dont have always be attractive and find someone, less household task you have to do by yourself or even pay by yourself (so less stress nowadays), less your parents being ashamed you are a loozer and feeling u missed your life overall and others are succeeding more easily than u , like there was something wrong in you..and perhaps more missings..Man were created to go out with Woman , so if you do not have a woman well you kind of failed the purpose of the creation of life and its evolution..
Lol, could have used this about a year ago! Thank all I figured it out on my own, still good to be reminded once in a while
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I dont need people's attention instead I need money to chase me like the master I am! "Money you are my servant"
Just saved my soul!Thank you man!
Nah this is gold I love this man. Lol
Lol, thanks! 🙏
Changed my whole perspective 💯
Amazing to hear! 🙏
I have to remember to take notes on this video.
Money is A TOOL. YOU NEED SKILLS TO USE THE TOOL PROPERLY.
Thanks Julien... now i make myself cvm.
Love you man, plz keep on doing what you do
Appreciate the videos regardless!
This is a video to be saved. Thanks!
I never had a girlfriend until I let one girl realize I wanted to be around her. Women love both attention and affection. They can't handle even the slightest hint of disinterest.
Does that work though? Most women get lots of attention and affection 24/7
Yeah sounds like you got a borderline hoe
Great work man
Such great content, thank you!
Julien My man thank you, can't thank you enough
GBU 👑 king
Great info - Thanks
What do I do if I’m needy of confidence
Ok but what about the basic human need for physical contact? I will never be able to provide that by myself.
That one is really tricky. Here’s how I think about it: It’s okay to have that’s need, but you have to act (and feel, as far as possible) that it’s already covered, which will in turn make it come to you.
Nice exchange
Need for physical contact. Thats new ahahagaga.
Boom! You hit the nail right on the head with that one.
This is so True: 9:06 your videos really help to understand myself
julian you did it again!
Mind-blowing stuff.
Nice!!! good timing. I'm getting better at loving myself
Hey! Julian or anyone else reading this. What about the fact that we need people/company/sex to live a “ good life” we genuinely need these things
Doragonz what about the countless studies coming out proving one of the biggest factor to our over all satisfaction in life is a mate, sense of community and friendships ?
Doragonz in that sense we do “ need” girls
Great stuff bro,for real!
Needed this
👌
Holy hell. The first 3 mins is literally identifying what my issue is
I have zero needs or needy desire, always have. Being that way does not make women chase you. The truth is, in the real world, no one cares.
Those glasses are next level brah
Worse. They are.
15:36 Julian's true form coming to light; he is a robot.
I only need air, sleep and food. Everything else is an illusion :)
Man you are a fucking genius... I think watching this video changed definitely my life... I regained consciousness! Thank you!
Don't wanna sound needy but I need those glasses of yours! So cool!
Thanks!