YES!!!! Ever since I read crazy Rich Asians and I watch the movie Inside how it was executed beautifully.. I think that that should be every girl's for just every females every person's go to when explaining to a man why they should not be with them. Why they should not put up with the mess
I loved that part of the movie!!!! Finally a movie that shows a healthy way to deal with men like these.. I was so darn proud of Astrid I have no words...
I hate how the movie adds to the expectations that women should be these free psychiatrist/therapists for their boyfriends. Its already a big issue in real life
big facts, if a dude shows signs of looking for a free therapist/mother figure I just dip ✌️ no woman is obligated to perform emotional labor for anyone else
@@catcollector1257 unfortunately this obviously reflects on reality since this was written by a teenager girl who thinks this is the ideal relationship. Big yikes.
@@JohnDoe-vw4zf "...women like you act [like] toxic trash." Whoa, some pretty loaded personal criticism against someone you haven't even met. Your conjecture is based on something I don't think belgium fan even said themself. Not wanting to be someone's therapist or mother figure is not being emotionally unavailable, and is completely valid, as those are extremely exhausting positions one needs to be qualified and stable to fill. Needing to prioritise your own comfort and mental health, and cutting off a relationship because the burdens that come along with it may too much for you to handle is not selfish. Perhaps it is even *selfless,* because someone in pain needs a platonic friend or qualified mental health professional more than romance, and demanding their love to you as their girlfriend can hurt them. Hell, being responsible for someone's mental health while having that sort of intimate connection (with or w/o sex) can be very coercive and harmful; you're not allowed to date your therapist for a very good reason. I've heard of ordinarily reasonable people swallowing some small form of "redpill," but I sure hope you're not one of the ones gagging on it.
This kind of scares me, as someone who is doing psychology next year with hopes of a job related to it, because I know that I have a lot of shit to sort out before I even *get* in a relationship. I'm aware of the way that our culture enforces certain dynamics for gender, and how that can very negatively impact men, but I don't have the energy or stability to deal with the deeper emotional issues of every boyfriend -- and I worry that being a woman and having a general interest in psych will make people think I can handle it, when I cannot. I think Olly Thorn goes into the women-as-therapists thing from a man's perspective, but he's not the first one to introduce the concept. Like, you wanna give a helping hand to someone because you care for them and you've made the choice, but you're not prepared to hack off your own arm? Idk, sis, I'm mad rambling.
"Don't flatter yourself"? With what? Thinking of myself as a human being deserving personal space and respect? If this is flattering for our lovely bad boy then I almost pity his self esteem.
Basically he was negging her, berating her looks as not something worthy of his attention. Wanker pick up artists are taught to break down a woman's self esteem to make her more likely to give the man what he wants.
Like what an incel thing to respond with. "Don't flatter yourself." Like that's not the point; most people aren't comfortable with some random guy that broke in without permission watching them naked.
I'm a 25 year old virign and when my collegues found out on an outing all they had to say was ok, that's cool. Nobody made any issue out of it, because it's not. It's not special nor is it a disease. Jesus.
Ana-Maria Bobe lucky for you. Some people I know be making such a big deal about my virginity. Like are you my vagina? Mind your business! It’s so weird. 😭😭
Ana-Maria Bobe I’m 22 and a Virgin and I get 1 out of 2 reactions. 1, some congratulate me, and just say “good for you, save yourself for someone that deserves you” or “nah, I don’t believe you. That’s not true, you’re lying”
I’m 24 and a virgin and it’s just whatever to me. Nothing special, nothing crazy, and whenever sex is brought up in conversation I sometimes just casually mention it. People congratulate me/say I’m lucky and to save it- and I’m just all “Yup /shrugs;” lol
and guess what? Nothing is wrong with that, if you want to save yourself for someone and haven't met the right person or if you don't want to have sex at all. It doesn't matter, it isn't anyone elses business.
Ngl this makes me feel a lil better about my virginity. I'm waiting 'till marriage (Lord knows when that'll be lol), and I sometimes worry about what people will think if I tell them. Nice to know that even at 25, people can be chill about it.
Ok but can we talk about the fact that she went with him to a location he wouldn't reveal for a reason she didn't know alone in his car into the forest after knowing him for like a week. And it ended in them kissing and not getting murdered. Cuz ya know. Romance.
@CrappyOneshots HONESTLY like if when they were at the lake (SO creepy she just went with him to the middle of nowhere when she barely knows him) he coulda just been like "hold your breath" and instead of having an uwu softboi deep moment of wow quiet is peaceful who'd have thought I'm not like other boys i like quiet how deep and different, he could have just tried to like drown her like that would have been both a cool twist and more realistic damn that's reality for ya bois don't go with strangers to the woods who will watch you change after you asked them to turn around OOOF
THANK YOU!!!! LEGIT was thinking the SAME Why would you ever go to the forest/woods where you don't know the area with some guy you barely know? The scene baffled me lol
I want the directors and the writer to wake up and realize that there really isn’t any social hierarchy in college. College is just getting your education so you can get a job.
Yeah I never understood this dynamic in college films. Granted, I dropped out after the first semester but, during my short time there I just went to school and went to work. I know there's a social life in college but there's no way people are worried about individuals on a huge campus (where you most likely won't know most people) when you pay to be there.
Yeah there’s no “popularity” thing in college. All that is left behind in school. You’re a little more grown in college and all you care about and focus on is your grades and projects and assignments. Everyone is a stranger in college (outside of your friends of course) so there’s no “populars” or “nerds”. I remember reading a story on Wattpad years and years ago and it was set in college but there was populars and cliques and someone in the comments said the story was obviously written by a high schooler bc college doesn’t do that shi.t
@@wonderlust1308 even some high schools don’t do that irl. Plus yeah college is definitely not like that, cause most people here have better thing to worry about than who’s loosing his virginity.
Thanks for clearing this up. I thought it’s an American tertiary institution thing because here it’s just vibes, we don’t give a damn man. At all. We just be minding our own business 😂😂
Hero Fiennes-Tiffin- the actor of Hardin- IS actually British, he’s from London, but he definitely did try to exaggerate the accent and it make it sound worse
the fact that sex in high school is so normalized makes me uncomfortable. i know a lot of teenagers actually do it, but i hate when shows or movies make it seem like a person is weird cause they didn't have sex while they were in school
@@Overquoted well I guess it just makes me uncomfortable since I'm only a freshman and couldn't even imagine doing something like that anytime soon. But I guess it depends on the person. But what I found really weird in the movie was that when the girl told them she was a virgin they acted like that was so crazy. And I'm not saying it's wrong to do it in high school, I'm just saying in general I really don't understand why the media makes loosing your virginity seem like a thing you HAVE to do while you're in high school or else it's weird.
The idea that "my love can fix you" is literally the reason why my stepmom is still with my physically abusive dad. It's so so messed up that little girls are being taught this stuff.
I feel you.. this book series pissed me of bc the author romanized toxic relationship and I’m like that shit and cute irl the guy never changes for the girl. My mom was stuck in a domestic violence relationship. He never physically hurt her pretty much like Hardin towards Tessa all of it was emotional and he was abusive towards me too. So this movie just makes me want to tell little teenage girls that LOVE doesn’t fix the guy it just makes him more abusive because he realizes how devoted you are towards him and how much you are willing to do for him.
Jeez I’m sorry to hear that, it’s truly heartbreaking that these movies make you think it’s okay to tolerate those things because you see a fiction character doing so.
@@earthgirl2929 yeah I’m tired of authors romantizing abusive relationships and they really did it now with 365 days. With all the women power movement going on and they dare make such a shitty movie. It just makes me sick that WOMEN are the ones writing these books.
For some reason women like to romanize toxic relationships as “complex and deep” just watched a show called Sex/Life where she is married to a great guy but keeps cheating with her ex boyfriend because he was a toxic Bad Boy would refused to respect her boundaries and constantly ignored when she said no or stop. Not that I like the main character at all because I don’t like her, but come on writers wtf
Girl, After is one of the most toxic things I've ever heard of. The main character literally cheats on her boyfriend, and we're supposed to feel bad for her when her relationship with the creepiest dude at school doesn't work out? The guy that doesn't even blink? And 👏 there's 👏 so 👏 many 👏 other 👏 problems. 👏 Long story short, I'm gonna love this video.
I also read the book but towards the end I just had to skip chapters I didn't like any of the characters whatsoever. I haven't even watched the movie cause I just know it ain't gone be good
TBH, that whole "You Made Me Into A Better Person" thing is only arguably good when it's actually "You Inspired Me To Re-Examine And Work To Improve Myself". Not "You Became My Life Coach And Assumed All My Emotional Burdens". And DEFINITELY not "You Became My Therapist". Unless it's a relationship between a patient and a therapist, which has its own separate massive issues.
I agree except are you saying that there are massive issues with regular patient/therapist relationships or that there are massive issues with romantic relationships between a patient and therapist?
it irritates me that almost all romance feeds into the “fix them” narrative. it’s as though the protagonist, particularly women, are taking on a new “project”. ugh.
Not to mention how incredibly insulting it is to have someone think they can "fix" you. Yes, im aware i have issues, no that doesn't mean you can treat me like im your fucking psychology project
I feel this. I've written fanfiction myself, and I've read it and some of the fanfiction I've read is SO AMAZING and I just... why can't that be made into movies? 🤣
"I used to fantasize about the most toxic relationships." SAME. Because that's what we were sold. Love has to overcome all or it's not worth having. You can't just meet someone and have a healthy relationship, you have to sUfFeR 😫😫😫😒
the 'you must fix a man and make him better' narrative along with this 'im not whole without you' narrative needs to stop...that man needs to fix himself
Or what about a relationship that's almost over cause she is tired of his shit, but he realizes that he has to be an actual good person to be able to have a relationship with her and actively tries to fix himself.
True. I hate the whole "man has some serious issues and needs this girls love to fix him" trope. Its so weird. He doesn't need a girlfriend he needs a therapist lol
I get the appeal of like the love and support from a partner can bring you out of a dark place, and that does happen, but that shouldn't be the only motivating factor and he shouldn't simply rely on her to fix him with love and support, but instead use it as a motivator (among other things) as a reason as to why he should fix himself.
Carlie I haven’t watched many myself, but a lot of romance movies from 90s are pretty good in that area. They’re still cliche in a few ways but not ‘in your face’ kinda thing. Check out Notting Hill. All the ones I’ve watched always ended with a kiss and never had any sex scenes what so ever. Sadly I can’t remember any of the titles. I’m sorry!
Howls moving castle- the movie is about the personal transformation for each character, without either of them forcing each other to do so - low key romance
LMAO that’s true. I still have Episode on my phone but it’s literally not good anymore. There’s only like 4 stories that I like and most of them still have the ridiculousness of Episode logic in them.
I’m so glad I never fantasized or idealised these toxic relationships and really wanted to cuddle with someone while watching a movie and my boyfriend being cheesily nice to me. The way media presents the ‘best’ relationship through abuse, physical, mental, and emotional smh.
Me too. The only movie/serie relationship I dream about is Morticia and Gomez Addams. It's crazy how often toxic relationships are portrayed as great and inspiring.
Ikr I'm here dreaming of having someone to watch terrible movies with and make fun of them, not someone who'll straight up break into my room and then use me as a free therapist lmao
Dallgi I know but it’s just messed up how they portray him as an asshole even if it’s not real... and after isn’t the only story to do that.. and Harry was upset about this because he blocked the author.
With 16-18 years old I was in exactly this kind of relationship, where I thought I could save the guy with my love, if I was there for him, had sex with him, showed him that he wasn't alone and he was worthy of love. And even though he constantly told me how I was just second choice, how I wasn't the one he wanted to be with, how he just basically put up with me only until someone better came along, I stayed, because movies and books had told me, that a broken man can be healed by a woman's love as long as she doesn't give up. And even though I am in a healthy and stable relationship now, this scarred me, possibly for life, and it makes me quite upset that there are so many movies that romanticize this idea.
Yeah in another way this dumb expectation ruins people life I am aromantic (doesn't feel romantic attraction and therefore can't feel romantic feelings) and I felt like I was failing as a woman and as a person in general because I couldn't give that love to the broken men in my life who took an interest in me. If my love was the only way to fix them and I couldn't give it to them, I felt like I was directly responsible for them becoming worse and worse. I forced myself despite that to be in miserable situation because I felt like I had to and was just waiting on the feelings to come so I could eventually help them. It contributed a lot to my already existing depression.
@@ArturGlass.C same thing happened to me I'm not aromantic but I was to broken to fall in love again but he had no patience and kind of forced me into the relationship and I kept waiting for the day I fall for him that on one side and my ex on the other side who couldn't deal with the fact that I moved on after he left me for someone else and started bullying me and starting rumors about me so my bf leaves me and he could get me back (because when you're single you automatically go back to your shitty ex) it's Scarry how that sounds romantic according to these "books"
Wow. Thats kind of slow. Hopefully you arent still making those mistake.... Remember and make sure to teach your future children (if you have any) or any young person to not fall for those silly ideals
" I hated him, I hated the creepiness of the situation,I hated his face! I hated his demeanour, I hated his voice!" I'm gonna use this when I'm talking to my friends about a bad date.
Right! I mean I read some fanfics and there are some amazing ones that never get turned into a movie and I'm just like ffs so these shitty ones can!?? Like wtff
Right??? I hate it I think maybe it's because all the high-quality fanfics are so fandom-specific that you just can't change the names and go whoop there's a movie, like, I just finished reading the most amazing hurt/comfort (and HEALTHIEST RELATIONSHIP) Good Omens fic, but you can't just go "oh there's a generic angel and demon, off they go on a road trip" and still make it work, but all the shitty ones? All the OOC bullshit and Fifty Shades and My Immortal? That shit is MADE for the general-est audience
Made me happy when you praised ‘the girl who played tessa’. I went to school with Jo and she is super talented and an all round lovely person ☺️ I haven’t seen the movie yet but I’m stoked that people are seeing how talented she is
carriex2 she was great in drama and school stage productions but by year 11 (junior year) she was already on TV ads and other stuff. Something I don’t think everyone realises is how smart she is though, she excelled in everything
That’s awesome. Honestly I hated the movie but Jo was probably the one thing that prevented it from being worse than it was. She really surprised me, I didn’t expect her to be quite good of an actress. She deserves better roles.
I read the fanfiction and they softened the movie a lot. The bet was about him being able to take her virginity and he did and he took the bed spread with her „virgin blood“ to his friends to prove it. He still tried to and successfully pulled the „but Tessa at that point I already loved you“ card. He is more violent in the fanfic. She also gets her job and everything because of him. She gets essentially isolated from her environment and home and technically school and it all gets directed towards Harry/Hardin. It is also a smut, so it is very quickly very sexual. It gets worse. I think fanfic is fanfic for a reason. Don’t make movies out of it
I never read it but I watched the video of that girl who did called "I read the After series so you don't have to" or something like that. I wasn't interested in watching or reading the series when it first came out anyway but after i watched that video and heard just how disgusting of a person the main love interest is throughout the entire series I didn't even wanna directly hate watch it. Listening to what he did to that one girl from his past and how he ruined her life because he couldn't keep his sexcapades to himself was disgusting even worse was that he didn't care about what he did to her.
Thank God i never read the fanfic! I was told it is a very popular fic and i should read it (when i was in my Wattpad days). I read 1/2 chapters and noped out pretty fast
ok things o find wrong with this movie: 1. TESSA AND HARDIN LOOK LIKE FREAKING SIBLINGS 2. tessa cheated on her boyfriend at that time and we were supposed to feel bad for her 3. its literally every episode story like make something original 4. they relationship is based on sex (its more about sex in the book) 5. they relationship seems so toxic like i can't😂💀 6. they make virgins seem like crazy people 7.hardin is like the f boy that every girl would be into and tessa is like the girl that would be like omg i don't like him blah blah and they still would end up together 8. this movie is something u would imagine in 7. grade about some guy u thought was cute 9. HARDINS FACE IS SO PUNCHABLE 10. this movie gives false hopes to some dumb teenagers that thing is they will act misterious then some "hot" guy would start to like them 11. its like every pov on tik tok 12. its just twilight🤦♀️ 13. i hate hardins voice
@@tosinakin2508 ik that i just struggled to find an English word to describe the whole thing also my bad attempt to mix it in with the 'is it crack' meme
The film was definitely bad, I ended up reading the books and god- "Harden" or rather harry was sooo toxic, controlling and violent it was just so weird, he basically treated her like shit and mad her cry a lot but no "They Love each other! Forget the fact he's emotionally abusing her"
I decided to watch a few after scenes and read the book a bit, and the comments are like "omg I want a bf like Hardin." I even told my classmate about after (who happens to be a twilight stan, so no surprise about the next thing i'll say) and she fricken fangirled. *child, N O*
In the book she was a piece of shit too. They tried to make her character "smart" but she was actually stupid af. At some point I was like "I'm happy he treats u like shit bc u deserve what u stay around for".
Jesus, I never realised how toxic it was, sadly I was one of the kids who thought that was a normal relationship and wanted Tessa to go back to Harry every time they broke up
I read the first book like... 2 years ago? So I was 16 and I thought it was sooooo good. Well... I started the second book 1 week later and never started the third book. I do not understand anymore how I liked it. It's just so wrong! Making us young girls think that it is okay if someone treats you like that as long as they "supposably" love you and that it is okay for someone to act like freaking ass Hardin if you had a bad past. Like... huh????? And really... why does tessa always go back to him? He literally doesn't do anything to get better and the whole book series (at least the 2 I read) were them fighting, having sex and repeat. Just not a book you should give to kids in their puberty where they are just growing up
Coming from a demisexual: I love how you explain how movies tend to focus on sex as a milestone for teens or any relationship. Like yeah, it could be good sex or whatever, but have you just had comfortable silence while cuddling? Sex doesn't need to happen. People don't need it or need to want it. And if someone does like having a lot of sex? Great, they just need to use protection and test more often. I don't understand why it's this impending doom if you're a virgin in college or if you have "too much" sex
@Seems Legit Another ace here and you took the words right out my mouth. People have begun to think that asexuals just want to feel special or that they can’t hold down a relationship because of the messages society, especially media, is putting out there.
I think u should come live in southeast asia, bcuz being virgin is like the norm for young adults here.😂😂😂 The only thing couples in our university do together is studying in the freaking library. As a demisexual, it's super easy here, since there's zero peer pressure abt sex or sth.
@Seems Legit Sex can be (and many actually do think of it as) a symbol of love. Something you do when you are fully ready to give all of yourself to a person you trust. But it doesn't equal love. Like these relationships in movies or TV make it as if sex is the glue keeps relationships together.
@@lotusrain4102 until you’re pressured to get married since apparently we have expiry date to be seen as marriageable. then comes the request of grandchild, then another one and so on
@@jacobrichards3680 whew so much but the two standout things were Hardin kept the used condom and the sheets (they had Tessa's virginal blood on them) to prove to his friends as evidence that they had sex and then refused to let her come during one time they were getting with each other unless she agreed to do everything he said.
I've only seen a few examples but he was way more manipulative and more trashy. He walked in drunk and when Tessa was all "go away, you're drunk" he went "but you know how I get when I'm alone" and like ik being emotionally distant is sucky but jesus this ain't it
@@jacobrichards3680 I'm reading the books, and Hardin is SO creepy and just overall abusive, the second book starts with his dumb monologue about how Tessa is his and only he can have her, and he treats her like literal trash and keeps refering to her as his and just his. And also kinda hits her when he gets drunk sooo
I hated this movie because their relationship was low-key toxic and only really sex driven, and they made it seem like that was okay. You have to remember that young teens and young adults are the ones who are watching this. Normalizing toxicity is not okay at all and teaching young people- who may not know a whole lot about relationships- that is not okay.
From what I know about the author and her writing this series, she was very much an adult when she wrote this series. She was sexualizing a teenage Harry Styles as a grown adult.
I think he fits a lot better to Tessa. Their character is very similar & he seems like a really good guy. Harden on the other hand is really unlikable.
Yeah fun fact for all you budding Y/As: Dudes with anger issues and weird relationships with their family (especially their mom) are not fun. Had one. 2/10 would not reccomend. They're not evil but if they haven't worked through their problems prior to your arrival, it's really not worth the effort and emotional strain they put you through. Find you a man that is emotionally stable and loves his mom
The only time I approve of the "immature male and smart and articulate female" relationship is when it doesn't become toxic. Proof: Peraltiago, Romione, Percabeth.
Until my dying day, I will believe Ron was so amazed to be married to Hermione that he was thrilled to do everything he could to support her. I do not care what Rowling or the fandom says.
This whole ideal is what got me into a relationship with the “mysterious bad boy” irl. And let me TELL YA, it’s not fun. I got lucky with him because he WANTED to change but it wasn’t sex or my doting affection that changed him. It was being so miserable 24/7 that we both went to counseling and got help. It’s hard and uncomfortable and EXPENSIVE. It’s sad. We’re so much healthier now and still getting better but change doesn’t happen all the time in these relationships. I’m lucky I fell in love with someone who eventually wanted to be healthy but as a codependent and an avid YA reader (despite being 22 yrs old) I could’ve easily ended up with an abuser or narcissistic trying to live out my ideal
Did y’all just ignore the fact that she is in a healthier relationship or did you just want to ignore what she said so that you could be with the “majority” of people that don’t agree
I think that most of us whould: a.) Start running b.) Start screaming like Laure Strode in Halloween c.) Catch a case But no, she just GASPS that one time and stares at a random stranger all love struck and stuff...
@@avonjoiyambot5737 I agree ! I only like sex scenes when they are suggested only and not shown. I think revealing sex scenes are very awkward to watch especially when the characters are supposed to be teenagers
While watching this I just felt bad for the people who are asexual and how disconnected they must feel when watching these types of movies where you cant have love without sex
Asexuals can still love people and enjoy sexual scenes in films/movies without actively participating in it But honestly as an Ace myself whenever this happens in films or books I just shrug it off and skip it while feeling repulsed lol
@@hopelesshaddy3332 Same, I am not young but I still skip through those scenes because, I just don't want to see it. Believe it or not I have never seen or read 50 shades of grey and I am 22!
@@sciencenerd777 lol I see myself in the future acting like that I always had a feeling something wasn't quite right about me since I never had crushes and never thought people were attractive in "that way," since I was little Even though I'm a growing teenager I still have the same opinion
I just don't watch these kinda movies. Like you can tell immediately by the trailer that it's gonna be shit. Altho I do admit that there seems to be a lot of sex scenes in tv shows lately (and most of the time straight sex scenes) and that I do find annoying. Like there is no need for that. It's so unnecessary. And I would actually love to see an ace character. Or just more of movies that have no romantic stuff in it (not that the characters have to be ace but that relationships just aren't a huge part of the plot)
I've been using Wattpad since launch and I remember when After was being written. I read the first chapter and I INSTANTLY deleted that shit from my library. I can't stand that book or any in the series. There's so many genuinely good authors and books on that app like Sir Rob or kpgcatlover and I've never been able to understand why After got so popular. [definitely bc of fandom support and the fact it was the one, and probably the first, novel fanfic the fandom had seen]. Call me whatever you'd like but I've been saying it since day 1, After and the series is trash that just got lucky based on it's background and the fact people eat up the Fifty Shades, hetero, toxic relationship dynamic like it's cocaine in a 80's night club.
When After first came out I was against reading it. It was so overpopulated. But then one night, I was stupid and was like, let's just see what all this craze is about. That first page sucked me in and I'm surprised you had the opposite effect! Interesting though that happened. I loved the series but I reread them a few months ago, it had been 5 years since I first read them. And oh my god, they are bad. The message they give is horrible. Stay with the abusive guy because you think you can change him? No! I agree it got lucky because of its background. It's sad it's glorified.
I don’t like After because their relationships toxic, in fact, I hate that, I like After because I can relate to it- which yes, I know, isn’t a good thing- but there are so many things that Hardin has said that has almost exactly been said to me, and Tessa’s confusion and struggle and hurt and inability to walk away, I relate to it. No one wants a toxic relationship, and it’s not like the people in them don’t care about each other, in fact that’s the biggest problem, because they love each other so much they desperately want it to work, but sometimes relationships just don’t. But after doesn't sugar coat it or have this whole ‘love solves everything’ mentality that isn’t at all realistic, instead, it shows that no matter how much they try to be better, they don’t actually progress into a healthy relationship until they spend YEARS apart
@@raerivers My biggest complaint is the writing. I think it's poorly executed and the plot is overall bad [take this lightly bc the books I usually read are classic English literature.] It also sends horrible messages to teenagers and glorifies toxic relationships. Not trying to start an argument, I respect that you like them. We just share different viewpoints on them and that's okay.
Soph xoxo Still promotes a toxic relationship because in the end after all the hell they put each other through that, I’m sorry can’t fix still get a happy ending.
@@eclectickells8844 Yes I completely agree with your last point, I really don't want to engage in some internet feud about a fictional couple and I respect that you don't like them. But for me- as someone who read these books while in a toxic situation myself- they helped me realize how much I saw myself in Tessa, and how that wasn't a good thing at all. Tessa's exhaustion, her feeling like her relationship with Hardin was one big back and forth cycle you can't escape, I related to, and I truly don't believe it glorified their relationship because it was a huge part in me realizing I had to get out of my own. If Anna had romanticized their relationship, I would have thought that mine was okay- healthy, even- so maybe the only reason I feel so strongly about them is because of how much the books helped me. I guess it's one of those situations that you need to experience to fully understand? I don't know
"I wear black and smiling physically pains me" 😂😂😂😂 It is sad that most Wattpad authors do love to pair abusive men and way-too-forgiving women, and it's not even an exaggeration. The sad thing about is that when you point out the toxic relationship on the comment section, young readers get angry and defend them!! Really enjoy this series and still wonder how you can multitask having bomb makeup and talk in detail!!
maegan dolorfo That’s too true cause like there are some authors that make “i fall in love with my bully 😍” fanfics and that shit is so toxic and disgusting. I honestly don’t believe that an actual sane human being writes that shit.
With how common it is, I wonder if we have it backwards. Like, the problem isn't that the stories glorify toxic relationships, but that abusive men/forgiving women is so pervasive in our society that they're just making stories out of what they see? It's like somehow _Beauty and the Beast_ became the archetype for all romance. Oh...wait. Aren't bad relationships every Disney movie ever?
"This fly bout to get smacked my guy; You are NOT Herbert and you acting like you own the place LIKE Herbert and you about to catch all of these palms and all of these hands." No fly could ever replace Herbert in our hearts, RIP🙏
7:12 Lmao, I thought I was the only one, I was like "Why couldn't they have hired an actual British person instead of a poor imitator?" come to find out he's actually British 🤦🏻♀️
As an ace person, I love the fact that you talked about that issue. I started dating someone who doesn't think sex is a paramount attribute of a romantic relationship, and we've been great! But the fact that all media portrays it in that way, I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, especially when I hear other people talk about our relationship without knowing the intricacies of it. Even when sex is a part of your relationship, it shouldn't be all that it's based upon, a lot of people that I know have put themselves through incredibly toxic relationships because that aspect was used as a tool, instead of mutual companionship. Thanks though, it was good to hear that from you Kennie! xx
ahhh a fellow ace person!! I've always loathed media like this. The media that makes sex seem like a priority, and essentially shames virgins. It always made me feel frustrated and disgusted, because I didn't want sex (I still don't and doubt I ever will), and I felt so abnormal and excluded. It's been amazing to discover the ace community and realize I'm not the only one! I'm also aro... so the way relationships are portrayed in media in general has been a source of frustration for me for years.
My bff is a fellow ace who taught me throughout the years that sex & romance isn’t everything, and I'm glad that this issue has been called out. I get that teens get horny and all but did Hollywood have to cash in on this crap
The problem with Wattpad is it focuses on the popularity of the book than the actual content....cause I've come across some really good books that are just not popular
"Don't flatter yourself." I was like BIIISH! GET OUT OF MY ROOM! I think that's my problem with all these "chick flicks" or whatever... the characters just fall in love! Just like that! And it's sooooo deep, sooooo truuueee, sooooo pure and I'm just there like "huh?" Y'all literally just met. Sooooo true cause I remember I used to be attracted to a guy for their sob story like "come, let me heal you!" Great review!
I realised I had to break the concepts of idolising toxic relationships that I'd been made to believe (thanks to media) were the 'best' and most 'fulfilling' relationships only after being in a domestic violence relationship and coming to understand that I am not responsible for a man's anger issues and 'dark past' and it is NOT my job to be the punching bag and 9/10 he won't turn around and say "Wow you changed me, I'm a better person now" and shape up ... because staying with them is enabling them for one, and secondly, because even if they DO ... it'll be between hits to give you a false sense of progress. That's such a true statement "If you are only attracted to the brokeness in people, you will only attract broken people". You're so gorgeous, thank you.
i honestly think most people read it bc it was so popular, and i read the first book to learn whats all about, and hated it SO much. when i read that he cheated on her, and in the book it describes it differently and more cruelly, and i was just done with it. "Dark"was kind of in the same category, i prefered it to After, but it was still bad. If anyone is interested its again with Harry Styles where he's a boxer and basicay stalks tf out of the main character, Bo
I’ve read all four of the published books and honestly I love them so much, I can’t deny that Hardin and Tessa are toxic, because, well, they are, but Anna Todd- the writer- doesn’t glamorise or romanticise it, but it is from Hardin and Tessa’s pov, so it is difficult to express that the author thinks their relationship is toxic without thinking ‘well if the character thinks this, why don’t they break up?’ And then after all four books and the two of them taking YEARS apart, they finally end up in a healthy, happy relationship.
Let’s petition for a movie about a girl who tries to heal a broken bad boy and fails. And then she realizes it his problem not hers and she finds someone else.
there is a difference between falling in love with someone's brokenness and loving someone who is/has brokenness? media romanticizes the first and it leads to toxic ways of thinking about relationships.. its a struggle to figure out how to love in healthy ways and support a loved one in their journey of self improvement without trying to act like the savior
I love your quote "When you're attracted to the brokenness in people you only attract broken people." I try very hard never attract broken people because it's toxic and you can't change them no matter how hard you try.
the white blondes with their black guy friends and the highschool jock/bad boy/popular kid and those three mean girls. honestly the four horsemen of this generation's romantic movie cliches (and its bad-)
In the books, she actually wasn't like this though. She was really rude and judgemental and thought she was better than everyone else when in reality she was the worst of them all.
Bianca P true, she got mad at her mother for being judgmental when she was the worst and literally called every girl at the party a slut for their outfit
Bianca P true, she got mad at her mother for being judgmental when she was the worst and literally called every girl at the party a slut for their outfit
Fanfiction.net was either a gold mine or a mine field💀 My bestfriend and I used to play "fanfiction roulette". (we'd pick a series and page then just randomly click.) Our young minds were not ready.😂
Kay Way Best way to describe it, lol. Some really great fics there, some of my favourites. Ones where they could surpass even the media it came from (though with Twilight that wasn’t hard, lol.). ...And then you had the ones with spelling and grammatical errors, terrible “character” likeness and the worst dialogue. “Fanfiction roulette” 😂👌🏻 Classic.
![[#2024MAMA] ROSÉ (로제), Bruno Mars - APT. | Mnet 241122 방송](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/dgGqD28J6aQ/mqdefault.jpg)
His character is so ew. When he said "Don't flatter yourself." when she reacted to him breaking into her room, I wanted to smack him.
Harry would never say that irl! ☹️☹️😔
shit Hero is fine. he did well as Hardin, when i saw that seen when he was in her room. i would be like “hello!”
Honestly dude was just good at his job because he acted just how his character was writ.
I would have beaten him up if he talked to me like that
yeeeesss hahahaha.
“They treat sex as a Goal as opposed to something you just do if you’re ready?” OMG THANK YOU WHY DOES EVERY MOVIE DO THIS?!
Because HOLLYWEIRD!!!!
It made me treat it as a goal. I was not ready and I made a lot of bad decisions because of it.
Sophia Troanska same girl, it gets better 💕
It used to be a bigger deal but humanity is evolving. Hollywood just hasn't caught up that this is a dated concept.
every american pie knock off in the 2000s
"Don't flatter yourself. I'm not looking." That ain't really the point tho, sir.
@succulent kool-aid bileve me it's not.
🤣💯
EXACTLY! Even if you're not looking, gtfo of her room you asshole! She should've called security on his ass.
YEP. I hate how these YA authors keep romanticizing narcissistic assholes.
@@alit7181 i- ew omg
Damn she really was spitting straight facts about the whole sex issue
I'll be the frost commenter XD
And in the words of Astrid Young: "It was never my job to make you feel like a man. I can't make you something you're not."
YES!!!! Ever since I read crazy Rich Asians and I watch the movie Inside how it was executed beautifully.. I think that that should be every girl's for just every females every person's go to when explaining to a man why they should not be with them. Why they should not put up with the mess
AND THEN SHE WALKED OUT OF THAT APARTMENT WITH HER 1.2 MILLION DOLLAR EARRINGS.
AN ICON.
Rj Bautista sounds very similar to something joan holloway said to her husband in mad men
I loved that part of the movie!!!! Finally a movie that shows a healthy way to deal with men like these.. I was so darn proud of Astrid I have no words...
My all-time favourite movie ✊🏾😌
I hate how the movie adds to the expectations that women should be these free psychiatrist/therapists for their boyfriends. Its already a big issue in real life
big facts, if a dude shows signs of looking for a free therapist/mother figure I just dip ✌️ no woman is obligated to perform emotional labor for anyone else
@@catcollector1257 unfortunately this obviously reflects on reality since this was written by a teenager girl who thinks this is the ideal relationship. Big yikes.
@@JohnDoe-vw4zf "...women like you act [like] toxic trash."
Whoa, some pretty loaded personal criticism against someone you haven't even met. Your conjecture is based on something I don't think belgium fan even said themself.
Not wanting to be someone's therapist or mother figure is not being emotionally unavailable, and is completely valid, as those are extremely exhausting positions one needs to be qualified and stable to fill. Needing to prioritise your own comfort and mental health, and cutting off a relationship because the burdens that come along with it may too much for you to handle is not selfish. Perhaps it is even *selfless,* because someone in pain needs a platonic friend or qualified mental health professional more than romance, and demanding their love to you as their girlfriend can hurt them. Hell, being responsible for someone's mental health while having that sort of intimate connection (with or w/o sex) can be very coercive and harmful; you're not allowed to date your therapist for a very good reason.
I've heard of ordinarily reasonable people swallowing some small form of "redpill," but I sure hope you're not one of the ones gagging on it.
@@fruitygarlic3601 I'm skipping all the red pill qualified bullshit because I know you know that op and fan were both being metaphorical cupcake.
This kind of scares me, as someone who is doing psychology next year with hopes of a job related to it, because I know that I have a lot of shit to sort out before I even *get* in a relationship.
I'm aware of the way that our culture enforces certain dynamics for gender, and how that can very negatively impact men, but I don't have the energy or stability to deal with the deeper emotional issues of every boyfriend -- and I worry that being a woman and having a general interest in psych will make people think I can handle it, when I cannot.
I think Olly Thorn goes into the women-as-therapists thing from a man's perspective, but he's not the first one to introduce the concept.
Like, you wanna give a helping hand to someone because you care for them and you've made the choice, but you're not prepared to hack off your own arm?
Idk, sis, I'm mad rambling.
"Don't flatter yourself"? With what? Thinking of myself as a human being deserving personal space and respect? If this is flattering for our lovely bad boy then I almost pity his self esteem.
It was more about her self esteem.
YESSSSSSSS
Basically he was negging her, berating her looks as not something worthy of his attention. Wanker pick up artists are taught to break down a woman's self esteem to make her more likely to give the man what he wants.
LMAO tru
“don’t flatter yourself”
BOY I WILL YOU REPORT YOU GET OUT OF MY ROOM
Calletano Fillspipe I love ya profile pic 😭❤️
😂😂😂 right
Whether the person watching me get dressed is attracted to me or not I don’t want anyone watching me get dressed without my consent wtf???
I would hit him with the “do I need to call the RA on duty?“
Like what an incel thing to respond with. "Don't flatter yourself." Like that's not the point; most people aren't comfortable with some random guy that broke in without permission watching them naked.
I'm a 25 year old virign and when my collegues found out on an outing all they had to say was ok, that's cool. Nobody made any issue out of it, because it's not. It's not special nor is it a disease. Jesus.
Ana-Maria Bobe lucky for you. Some people I know be making such a big deal about my virginity. Like are you my vagina? Mind your business! It’s so weird. 😭😭
Ana-Maria Bobe I’m 22 and a Virgin and I get 1 out of 2 reactions. 1, some congratulate me, and just say “good for you, save yourself for someone that deserves you” or “nah, I don’t believe you. That’s not true, you’re lying”
I’m 24 and a virgin and it’s just whatever to me. Nothing special, nothing crazy, and whenever sex is brought up in conversation I sometimes just casually mention it. People congratulate me/say I’m lucky and to save it- and I’m just all “Yup /shrugs;” lol
and guess what? Nothing is wrong with that, if you want to save yourself for someone and haven't met the right person or if you don't want to have sex at all. It doesn't matter, it isn't anyone elses business.
Ngl this makes me feel a lil better about my virginity. I'm waiting 'till marriage (Lord knows when that'll be lol), and I sometimes worry about what people will think if I tell them. Nice to know that even at 25, people can be chill about it.
Ok but can we talk about the fact that she went with him to a location he wouldn't reveal for a reason she didn't know alone in his car into the forest after knowing him for like a week. And it ended in them kissing and not getting murdered. Cuz ya know. Romance.
I watched more true crime than romance as a kid/teen and my hackles are raised just knowing that happened omfg who would ever be so stupid
@@ZovestaDark i kept feeling like it was going to turn into a horror movie honestly y i k e s
@CrappyOneshots HONESTLY like if when they were at the lake (SO creepy she just went with him to the middle of nowhere when she barely knows him) he coulda just been like "hold your breath" and instead of having an uwu softboi deep moment of wow quiet is peaceful who'd have thought I'm not like other boys i like quiet how deep and different, he could have just tried to like drown her like that would have been both a cool twist and more realistic damn that's reality for ya bois don't go with strangers to the woods who will watch you change after you asked them to turn around OOOF
I kept expecting it to turn into something along the lines of “you”
THANK YOU!!!! LEGIT was thinking the SAME
Why would you ever go to the forest/woods where you don't know the area with some guy you barely know? The scene baffled me lol
I want the directors and the writer to wake up and realize that there really isn’t any social hierarchy in college. College is just getting your education so you can get a job.
Yeah I never understood this dynamic in college films. Granted, I dropped out after the first semester but, during my short time there I just went to school and went to work.
I know there's a social life in college but there's no way people are worried about individuals on a huge campus (where you most likely won't know most people) when you pay to be there.
fun fact: the writer never went to college.
Yeah there’s no “popularity” thing in college. All that is left behind in school. You’re a little more grown in college and all you care about and focus on is your grades and projects and assignments. Everyone is a stranger in college (outside of your friends of course) so there’s no “populars” or “nerds”. I remember reading a story on Wattpad years and years ago and it was set in college but there was populars and cliques and someone in the comments said the story was obviously written by a high schooler bc college doesn’t do that shi.t
@@wonderlust1308 even some high schools don’t do that irl. Plus yeah college is definitely not like that, cause most people here have better thing to worry about than who’s loosing his virginity.
Thanks for clearing this up. I thought it’s an American tertiary institution thing because here it’s just vibes, we don’t give a damn man. At all. We just be minding our own business 😂😂
“I wear black and smiling physically pains me.”
Bruh, best line.
How y’all gunna tell me he British like me with an accent like that 💀
OMG GIRL, I've been on youtube for yearsss and ive never found someone else with the same name/username as me! Except mine is spelt 세연.
SAE-Yeon새연 i thought his accent was fake so i was confused when i discovered it was real😭
Hero Fiennes-Tiffin- the actor of Hardin- IS actually British, he’s from London, but he definitely did try to exaggerate the accent and it make it sound worse
Errr babe im from london and that is our accent.... this posh accent u guys think we have.. theres different areas with different accents lmao
It sounds like his accent has been "watered down" from probably living in LA
the fact that sex in high school is so normalized makes me uncomfortable. i know a lot of teenagers actually do it, but i hate when shows or movies make it seem like a person is weird cause they didn't have sex while they were in school
Highscoolers are in general sexualised and it creeps me out. Riverdale is really bad at this
Agreed 100x
Theyre in college in this movie, its just that the boyfriend is a year younger than the mc
It’s super uncomfortable! Why does Hollywood wanna sexualize high schoolers (essentially children) so much? It’s disturbing
@@Overquoted well I guess it just makes me uncomfortable since I'm only a freshman and couldn't even imagine doing something like that anytime soon. But I guess it depends on the person. But what I found really weird in the movie was that when the girl told them she was a virgin they acted like that was so crazy. And I'm not saying it's wrong to do it in high school, I'm just saying in general I really don't understand why the media makes loosing your virginity seem like a thing you HAVE to do while you're in high school or else it's weird.
The idea that "my love can fix you" is literally the reason why my stepmom is still with my physically abusive dad. It's so so messed up that little girls are being taught this stuff.
I feel you.. this book series pissed me of bc the author romanized toxic relationship and I’m like that shit and cute irl the guy never changes for the girl. My mom was stuck in a domestic violence relationship. He never physically hurt her pretty much like Hardin towards Tessa all of it was emotional and he was abusive towards me too. So this movie just makes me want to tell little teenage girls that LOVE doesn’t fix the guy it just makes him more abusive because he realizes how devoted you are towards him and how much you are willing to do for him.
Jeez I’m sorry to hear that, it’s truly heartbreaking that these movies make you think it’s okay to tolerate those things because you see a fiction character doing so.
@@earthgirl2929 yeah I’m tired of authors romantizing abusive relationships and they really did it now with 365 days. With all the women power movement going on and they dare make such a shitty movie. It just makes me sick that WOMEN are the ones writing these books.
@@jimenaroman1999 Yea I really don’t understand it at all like this all stemmed from twilight to be honest.
For some reason women like to romanize toxic relationships as “complex and deep” just watched a show called Sex/Life where she is married to a great guy but keeps cheating with her ex boyfriend because he was a toxic Bad Boy would refused to respect her boundaries and constantly ignored when she said no or stop. Not that I like the main character at all because I don’t like her, but come on writers wtf
The best thing that came from this book series and movies is that Harry Styles blocked the author on social media.
Cookiecat 33 for real?
@@beyzaa9682 Yeah! It's amazing.
Lmao
it's what she deserves😔✊
@@footpicsfor50dollars35 so true tho......
I'd love a story where the character stays a virgin the whole way through and isn't made out as someone who needs to change for that reason
Exactly
They should make more asexuals characters and that would happen quite a lot.
To all the boys I ever loved before
Juniper Lee To all the boys I ever loved before
Laureen Berger To all the boys I ever loved before
Girl, After is one of the most toxic things I've ever heard of. The main character literally cheats on her boyfriend, and we're supposed to feel bad for her when her relationship with the creepiest dude at school doesn't work out? The guy that doesn't even blink?
And 👏 there's 👏 so 👏 many 👏 other 👏 problems. 👏 Long story short, I'm gonna love this video.
Babylon's Mediocre Art let’s not forget she’s incredibly annoying, seems like every chapter she was crying about something
Lmao he really didn't blink omg 😂
Babylon's Mediocre Art it’s reality
Babylon's Mediocre Art
I remember reading it when i was 15 and literally stopped halfway , it was too much even for a 15yo
I also read the book but towards the end I just had to skip chapters I didn't like any of the characters whatsoever. I haven't even watched the movie cause I just know it ain't gone be good
Society frowns upon teenage sex but makes it a goal in the television
"fun fact: when you're attracted to the brokenness in people, you only attract broken people"
This hit hard... 😂😂😂
Same! So glad I stopped.
Kendall getting angry "you are not herbert stop acting like him" 😂
rip herbert, we loved you
"How dare you fly where he flew!"
“You don’t belong here” 😂 oh I do love KENNIE
TBH, that whole "You Made Me Into A Better Person" thing is only arguably good when it's actually "You Inspired Me To Re-Examine And Work To Improve Myself". Not "You Became My Life Coach And Assumed All My Emotional Burdens". And DEFINITELY not "You Became My Therapist". Unless it's a relationship between a patient and a therapist, which has its own separate massive issues.
I agree except are you saying that there are massive issues with regular patient/therapist relationships or that there are massive issues with romantic relationships between a patient and therapist?
@@bella6843 I meant romantic specifically, sorry for the poor phrasing
Madi H you’re good I was just confused😊
@@bella6843 Yeah naw therapists are good. Everyone deserves a good relationship w/ their therapist
Harley Quinn x The Joker: 👁👄👁 👁👄👁
it irritates me that almost all romance feeds into the “fix them” narrative. it’s as though the protagonist, particularly women, are taking on a new “project”. ugh.
it's terrible and it encourages girls to stay in abusive relationships.
amart furniture ugh ikr I (unfortunately) read the books and it was even worse. They need to fix themselves before they damage their SO.
Not to mention how incredibly insulting it is to have someone think they can "fix" you.
Yes, im aware i have issues, no that doesn't mean you can treat me like im your fucking psychology project
The only diy I’m doing is my furniture not my man
@@tabitha9723 Yes QUEEN!
as a fan-fiction writer, I feel offended by this fanfiction and movie based on it cause we can do so much better D:
@Thanos the Farmer some fanfictions are really an award worthy
Yes *Award worthy* I litterally read way to many house of anubis fanfics but *Scarred* and a *Dangerous Arrangement* are AMAZING
I've read fanfics that have made me weep. Like. We can do so much better. Hollywood pay attention
Fr some of these fics have actually changed my life
I feel this. I've written fanfiction myself, and I've read it and some of the fanfiction I've read is SO AMAZING and I just... why can't that be made into movies? 🤣
“she took my hand and led me out of the daHKnuss” i made the UGLIEST SOUND
That part had me like, 'bruh!'
i'm fuckin wheezing
Oh my god I knew it was coming and I still dry heaved
I also made a gross sound when I heard that blechhh
Omg SAME 😂😂😂😂
"I used to fantasize about the most toxic relationships."
SAME. Because that's what we were sold. Love has to overcome all or it's not worth having. You can't just meet someone and have a healthy relationship, you have to sUfFeR 😫😫😫😒
I just used to fantasize about waltzes an picnics...I still do
@@sailormoon6848 that is so pure 💖
Telenovelas and animes are full of toxic relationships LOL I'm still waiting for my serenata though...I'll probably be 80yrs old
A lot of older women justify these books as fantasy. No woman actually want to date someone like that and I'm like what about the young girls?
I feel like this is why my relationship was toxic, Bc that’s all I fantasized about in middle school and part of high school
the 'you must fix a man and make him better' narrative along with this 'im not whole without you' narrative needs to stop...that man needs to fix himself
Or what about a relationship that's almost over cause she is tired of his shit, but he realizes that he has to be an actual good person to be able to have a relationship with her and actively tries to fix himself.
👏🏾👍🏾
True. I hate the whole "man has some serious issues and needs this girls love to fix him" trope. Its so weird. He doesn't need a girlfriend he needs a therapist lol
That man needs a licensed professional. And I haven't been to anybody's school of psychiatry or psychology. Whatever he needs, I'm not it.
I get the appeal of like the love and support from a partner can bring you out of a dark place, and that does happen, but that shouldn't be the only motivating factor and he shouldn't simply rely on her to fix him with love and support, but instead use it as a motivator (among other things) as a reason as to why he should fix himself.
Kennie: “The twist is-“
Ad: *”I wouldn’t be caught dead at a Donald Trump rally”*
Well okay then
I mean I bet that's true for kennie 😂😂😂
OMG, PragerU 😂
I already have to see how bad After is I don’t need another bad thing here 😁 #FûckTrump
I got
The twist is- I’m a venuuus
"The twist is that it's hard to believe the mint mobile plan is just $15 per person"
I feel like Kennie could sing "riSe ANd ShiNE" impeccably
Inioluwa Adeboye I need to know how I was thinking of that meme, right before I saw this comment wow
I want a romance movie were there is no sex, just focusing on the romance angle and it has
A plot that makes sense and isn't as dry as styrofoam
Carlie I haven’t watched many myself, but a lot of romance movies from 90s are pretty good in that area. They’re still cliche in a few ways but not ‘in your face’ kinda thing. Check out Notting Hill. All the ones I’ve watched always ended with a kiss and never had any sex scenes what so ever. Sadly I can’t remember any of the titles. I’m sorry!
Try to watch Korean drama then
@@snikrdoodls14 pride and prejudice! the romance in itself is so passionate and sexy, but they don't even kiss until the final scene
Howls moving castle- the movie is about the personal transformation for each character, without either of them forcing each other to do so - low key romance
nypry oh I’ve heard of that and really wanted to watch it ^^
“After” reminded me of the app called “Episode”. Like it was Episode in a movie. 👀
Or the love island app...
"I love him. He's got the banter..#😏
This is exactly what I thought of lmao
Choices is the best type of interactive story app since the stories aren’t over sexual and don’t stupid ass apps
LMAO that’s true. I still have Episode on my phone but it’s literally not good anymore. There’s only like 4 stories that I like and most of them still have the ridiculousness of Episode logic in them.
@@kottonkandy0962 the only story i like is the demi lovato series, like that's it. The other stories are just getting too messy
I’m so glad I never fantasized or idealised these toxic relationships and really wanted to cuddle with someone while watching a movie and my boyfriend being cheesily nice to me. The way media presents the ‘best’ relationship through abuse, physical, mental, and emotional smh.
I'm glad
Claire Henri same I love hugs and being soft 😂
Me too. The only movie/serie relationship I dream about is Morticia and Gomez Addams.
It's crazy how often toxic relationships are portrayed as great and inspiring.
Ikr I'm here dreaming of having someone to watch terrible movies with and make fun of them, not someone who'll straight up break into my room and then use me as a free therapist lmao
It’s just horrible they made this based Harry Styles...
Jimena Roman it’s a fanfic... what’d you expect
Dallgi I know but it’s just messed up how they portray him as an asshole even if it’s not real... and after isn’t the only story to do that.. and Harry was upset about this because he blocked the author.
Poor harry 😳(he's rich but I hope you get it)
He actually ended up blocking the author on twitter.
Half Blood Scum oh god imagine having a story like that, that was inspired by your existence💀
Kennie : "The twist is that-"
Me: *gets ad*
What a twist
matcha Frappuccino omg same. I was like da-da-dum cliffhanger !
Lol
Was looking for this comment exact same happened to me
Switch to chromebook! 😂😂
Lynette Tyler saaame 😂😂😂
With 16-18 years old I was in exactly this kind of relationship, where I thought I could save the guy with my love, if I was there for him, had sex with him, showed him that he wasn't alone and he was worthy of love. And even though he constantly told me how I was just second choice, how I wasn't the one he wanted to be with, how he just basically put up with me only until someone better came along, I stayed, because movies and books had told me, that a broken man can be healed by a woman's love as long as she doesn't give up. And even though I am in a healthy and stable relationship now, this scarred me, possibly for life, and it makes me quite upset that there are so many movies that romanticize this idea.
Dormouse I’m sorry this even happened to you
Im so sorry something like this happened to you that guy is trash 😡
Yeah in another way this dumb expectation ruins people life I am aromantic (doesn't feel romantic attraction and therefore can't feel romantic feelings) and I felt like I was failing as a woman and as a person in general because I couldn't give that love to the broken men in my life who took an interest in me. If my love was the only way to fix them and I couldn't give it to them, I felt like I was directly responsible for them becoming worse and worse. I forced myself despite that to be in miserable situation because I felt like I had to and was just waiting on the feelings to come so I could eventually help them. It contributed a lot to my already existing depression.
@@ArturGlass.C same thing happened to me I'm not aromantic but I was to broken to fall in love again but he had no patience and kind of forced me into the relationship and I kept waiting for the day I fall for him that on one side and my ex on the other side who couldn't deal with the fact that I moved on after he left me for someone else and started bullying me and starting rumors about me so my bf leaves me and he could get me back (because when you're single you automatically go back to your shitty ex) it's Scarry how that sounds romantic according to these "books"
Wow. Thats kind of slow. Hopefully you arent still making those mistake.... Remember and make sure to teach your future children (if you have any) or any young person to not fall for those silly ideals
"she took my hand... and led me out of the DOKness"
This comment SLAPPED me
I'm dying 😂
"Fun fact! When you're attracted to the brokenness in people, you only attract broken people." DAMN STRAIGHT.
" I hated him, I hated the creepiness of the situation,I hated his face! I hated his demeanour, I hated his voice!"
I'm gonna use this when I'm talking to my friends about a bad date.
Literally, read this as she said it!
Is it just me or does anyone else hate the name "Hardin" as well? It honestly sounds like a name that tries too damn hard.
is that a pun? XD
It was the only thing I liked about the character.😅
But mostly I’m British and it sounds fucking ridiculous with our accent. It’s such an American name
When I watched the movie I tried so hard not to laugh everytime his name was mentioned. Hardin translates as garden in our language.
Imogen Holly Moss it really does ..🙁😬
"Don't flatter yourself. I'm not looking." He says as he's looking *right* at her
There's a ton of high-quality amazing fanfics yet the ones getting attention are the worst fandom has to offer smh
Kate Kursive
Yes! I HATE that.
I really hate how most people think that smut and shit fanfic is all we offer!
Im legit just waiting for those "oh I sold you to someone" or the "humans are slaves to vampires" or those "rejected soulmate" stories
Right! I mean I read some fanfics and there are some amazing ones that never get turned into a movie and I'm just like ffs so these shitty ones can!?? Like wtff
Right??? I hate it
I think maybe it's because all the high-quality fanfics are so fandom-specific that you just can't change the names and go whoop there's a movie, like, I just finished reading the most amazing hurt/comfort (and HEALTHIEST RELATIONSHIP) Good Omens fic, but you can't just go "oh there's a generic angel and demon, off they go on a road trip" and still make it work, but all the shitty ones? All the OOC bullshit and Fifty Shades and My Immortal? That shit is MADE for the general-est audience
When you said "And fun fact: when you're attracted to the brokenness in people ... you attract broken people"
you really came for me .
Made me happy when you praised ‘the girl who played tessa’. I went to school with Jo and she is super talented and an all round lovely person ☺️ I haven’t seen the movie yet but I’m stoked that people are seeing how talented she is
That's so cool! I'm interested to see her grow and work with material that isn't shit! was she a stage actor at your school?
carriex2 she was great in drama and school stage productions but by year 11 (junior year) she was already on TV ads and other stuff. Something I don’t think everyone realises is how smart she is though, she excelled in everything
That’s awesome. Honestly I hated the movie but Jo was probably the one thing that prevented it from being worse than it was. She really surprised me, I didn’t expect her to be quite good of an actress. She deserves better roles.
Omg she like, CARRIED this movie. Seriously, if she wasn't as good an actress Tessa would be insufferable. Hope to see her on more stuff!
aww, so sweet you speak out your praise for her in the comments too
I read the fanfiction and they softened the movie a lot. The bet was about him being able to take her virginity and he did and he took the bed spread with her „virgin blood“ to his friends to prove it. He still tried to and successfully pulled the „but Tessa at that point I already loved you“ card. He is more violent in the fanfic. She also gets her job and everything because of him. She gets essentially isolated from her environment and home and technically school and it all gets directed towards Harry/Hardin. It is also a smut, so it is very quickly very sexual. It gets worse. I think fanfic is fanfic for a reason. Don’t make movies out of it
Dear God that sounds absolutely awful 😳
What the….😧
I never read it but I watched the video of that girl who did called "I read the After series so you don't have to" or something like that. I wasn't interested in watching or reading the series when it first came out anyway but after i watched that video and heard just how disgusting of a person the main love interest is throughout the entire series I didn't even wanna directly hate watch it. Listening to what he did to that one girl from his past and how he ruined her life because he couldn't keep his sexcapades to himself was disgusting even worse was that he didn't care about what he did to her.
Thank God i never read the fanfic!
I was told it is a very popular fic and i should read it (when i was in my Wattpad days). I read 1/2 chapters and noped out pretty fast
ok things o find wrong with this movie:
1. TESSA AND HARDIN LOOK LIKE FREAKING SIBLINGS
2. tessa cheated on her boyfriend at that time and we were supposed to feel bad for her
3. its literally every episode story like make something original
4. they relationship is based on sex (its more about sex in the book)
5. they relationship seems so toxic like i can't😂💀
6. they make virgins seem like crazy people
7.hardin is like the f boy that every girl would be into and tessa is like the girl that would be like omg i don't like him blah blah and they still would end up together
8. this movie is something u would imagine in 7. grade about some guy u thought was cute
9. HARDINS FACE IS SO PUNCHABLE
10. this movie gives false hopes to some dumb teenagers that thing is they will act misterious then some "hot" guy would start to like them
11. its like every pov on tik tok
12. its just twilight🤦♀️
13. i hate hardins voice
14. This punchable-faced loser is named after a Pokémon move
Some things I like about this movie.
1. You can make puns and bad jokes out of Hardin's name
2. You can laugh at how idiotic those people are
YAAS to the punchable fact 👌
I though I was the only one who thought that they looked reeeaaallly similar 😭
Viktoria Liskova well, the 2nd movie is coming this year in April (guessing the month) and i’m seeing it😂
he literally came off as a creeper through out the whole movie and idg how Tess got 'attracted' to him...was it Stockholm syndrome
Creeper
Aww man
(I contribute nothing to society)
No, Stockholm syndrome is more complex than that. He is terrible though.
@@tosinakin2508 ik that i just struggled to find an English word to describe the whole thing also my bad attempt to mix it in with the 'is it crack' meme
pfft stockholm syndrome... 😏 who’s this shadow hol-
Amelia Jones 😂😂
The film was definitely bad, I ended up reading the books and god- "Harden" or rather harry was sooo toxic, controlling and violent it was just so weird, he basically treated her like shit and mad her cry a lot but no "They Love each other! Forget the fact he's emotionally abusing her"
Azure Sparky Omg that book was toxic AS FUCK.
I decided to watch a few after scenes and read the book a bit, and the comments are like "omg I want a bf like Hardin."
I even told my classmate about after (who happens to be a twilight stan, so no surprise about the next thing i'll say) and she fricken fangirled.
*child, N O*
In the book she was a piece of shit too. They tried to make her character "smart" but she was actually stupid af. At some point I was like "I'm happy he treats u like shit bc u deserve what u stay around for".
Jesus, I never realised how toxic it was, sadly I was one of the kids who thought that was a normal relationship and wanted Tessa to go back to Harry every time they broke up
I read the first book like... 2 years ago? So I was 16 and I thought it was sooooo good. Well... I started the second book 1 week later and never started the third book. I do not understand anymore how I liked it. It's just so wrong! Making us young girls think that it is okay if someone treats you like that as long as they "supposably" love you and that it is okay for someone to act like freaking ass Hardin if you had a bad past. Like... huh????? And really... why does tessa always go back to him? He literally doesn't do anything to get better and the whole book series (at least the 2 I read) were them fighting, having sex and repeat. Just not a book you should give to kids in their puberty where they are just growing up
Coming from a demisexual: I love how you explain how movies tend to focus on sex as a milestone for teens or any relationship. Like yeah, it could be good sex or whatever, but have you just had comfortable silence while cuddling? Sex doesn't need to happen. People don't need it or need to want it. And if someone does like having a lot of sex? Great, they just need to use protection and test more often.
I don't understand why it's this impending doom if you're a virgin in college or if you have "too much" sex
@Seems Legit Another ace here and you took the words right out my mouth. People have begun to think that asexuals just want to feel special or that they can’t hold down a relationship because of the messages society, especially media, is putting out there.
I think u should come live in southeast asia, bcuz being virgin is like the norm for young adults here.😂😂😂 The only thing couples in our university do together is studying in the freaking library. As a demisexual, it's super easy here, since there's zero peer pressure abt sex or sth.
Right I hate how people make it seem like if you haven't had sex yet you're behind in life. I have a guy friend who makes it a big deal sometimes.
@Seems Legit Sex can be (and many actually do think of it as) a symbol of love. Something you do when you are fully ready to give all of yourself to a person you trust. But it doesn't equal love. Like these relationships in movies or TV make it as if sex is the glue keeps relationships together.
@@lotusrain4102 until you’re pressured to get married since apparently we have expiry date to be seen as marriageable. then comes the request of grandchild, then another one and so on
Idk but the actor and actress who play the main characters kinda look like fraternal twins. Something about their eyes, eyebrows and side profiles
DistressedDamsel79 sweet home Alabama plays in the distance
Jfc yeah xD
DistressedDamsel79 OH GOD!
Literally they look like siblings
FACTS
The saddest thing is that the movie is less problematic than the books, by like a mile.
What happened in the book?
@@jacobrichards3680 whew so much but the two standout things were Hardin kept the used condom and the sheets (they had Tessa's virginal blood on them) to prove to his friends as evidence that they had sex and then refused to let her come during one time they were getting with each other unless she agreed to do everything he said.
@@taliaanyabuike4460 Yikes I...
I've only seen a few examples but he was way more manipulative and more trashy. He walked in drunk and when Tessa was all "go away, you're drunk" he went "but you know how I get when I'm alone" and like ik being emotionally distant is sucky but jesus this ain't it
@@jacobrichards3680 I'm reading the books, and Hardin is SO creepy and just overall abusive, the second book starts with his dumb monologue about how Tessa is his and only he can have her, and he treats her like literal trash and keeps refering to her as his and just his. And also kinda hits her when he gets drunk sooo
"when you're attracted to the brokenness in people, you only attracted broken people" PREACH IT
I hated this movie because their relationship was low-key toxic and only really sex driven, and they made it seem like that was okay. You have to remember that young teens and young adults are the ones who are watching this. Normalizing toxicity is not okay at all and teaching young people- who may not know a whole lot about relationships- that is not okay.
From what I know about the author and her writing this series, she was very much an adult when she wrote this series. She was sexualizing a teenage Harry Styles as a grown adult.
As I was watching After this morning I literally said “Kennie is going to call this roommate vapid”
THE BLACK GUY IS ACTUALLY SO CUTE THOUGH
HARDIN GET OUTTA MY FACE
Agree with you. He's way better looking than the so-called Harden.
I think he fits a lot better to Tessa. Their character is very similar & he seems like a really good guy. Harden on the other hand is really unlikable.
Traveler's Garden - Der Garten der Reisenden FUCK NO Tessa doesn’t deserve him at all.
@@sweetner844 Yeah...you got a point. She is a cheater after all...forgot about that.
Traveler's Garden - Der Garten der Reisenden see, I would have shipped them, but then I realized that he deserved somebody wayyyy better than Tessa
Yeah fun fact for all you budding Y/As: Dudes with anger issues and weird relationships with their family (especially their mom) are not fun. Had one. 2/10 would not reccomend. They're not evil but if they haven't worked through their problems prior to your arrival, it's really not worth the effort and emotional strain they put you through. Find you a man that is emotionally stable and loves his mom
I thought the trend was Daddy issues, Mommy issues is new to me but ok
@@laoaidan2400 Both is a problem really, I'm just adding mom issues because I see that one more often in real life
Girls who romanticize bad boys are probably into bdsm in real life.
LangBellsChannel more like they aren’t able to distinguish the difference between mutually consensual bdsm and genuine abuse
You are 1000% on point
i felt so bad for the boyfriend, i only carried on watching to see if he got some sort of revenge
edit: the boyfriend who got cheated on i mean
OMG THAT PISSED ME OFF SO MUCH
like,,,tessa sis,,,you have a bf,,,s t o p
강은주 IKKKKK AND HE WAS SO CHILL ABOUT IT ISTG.
*fly enters
Kennie: You come into MY HOUSE buzzing like MY SON-
His voice is like caught in his throat, like that one terrible inspirational-speech-headass girl on vine
Bianca Perez i HATE that i know who you mean
Like he has a mouth full of marbles and mashed potatoes.
"and then they have sex, now we're like 80% through the movie"
Sad thing is, I literally write this to get over mind blocks in my story for the romantic scenes. It helps get the creative juices flowing, lol.
The only time I approve of the "immature male and smart and articulate female" relationship is when it doesn't become toxic.
Proof: Peraltiago, Romione, Percabeth.
Can you name the movies where these ships are from please ? ( except Romione, I already know it )
Peraltiago - it's from a show called Brooklyn 99
Percabeth - it's a book called Percy Jackson
Louder for Percy Jackson 😭❤️
Until my dying day, I will believe Ron was so amazed to be married to Hermione that he was thrilled to do everything he could to support her. I do not care what Rowling or the fandom says.
@@mst3kharris facts
This whole ideal is what got me into a relationship with the “mysterious bad boy” irl. And let me TELL YA, it’s not fun. I got lucky with him because he WANTED to change but it wasn’t sex or my doting affection that changed him. It was being so miserable 24/7 that we both went to counseling and got help. It’s hard and uncomfortable and EXPENSIVE. It’s sad. We’re so much healthier now and still getting better but change doesn’t happen all the time in these relationships. I’m lucky I fell in love with someone who eventually wanted to be healthy but as a codependent and an avid YA reader (despite being 22 yrs old) I could’ve easily ended up with an abuser or narcissistic trying to live out my ideal
wait you're codependent? yeah you should get out the relationship if you still are and haven't worked on that
That Being Said I’m codependent in general but we’re both in counseling and couples counseling and are actually quite healthy now
YIKESSS
Did y’all just ignore the fact that she is in a healthier relationship or did you just want to ignore what she said so that you could be with the “majority” of people that don’t agree
Good for you! (That sounds sarcastic, sorry.) hope you’re doing well
"I wear black and smiling physically pains me!" 😂😂😂
and can we just talk about tessa's unnatural reaction when she finds a random british guy on her bed?
I think that most of us whould:
a.) Start running
b.) Start screaming like Laure Strode in Halloween
c.) Catch a case
But no, she just GASPS that one time and stares at a random stranger all love struck and stuff...
The way she said "I wanna bring him up cuz he cute" was the cutest shit bye
I was so quick my finger got carpet burn, also vocals, also I love being a home skillet biscuit 🥺🥺🥺
When she said she was a Fanfiction.net girl, I felt that 😂.
Same here 😂😭🤣
Lol yes still am and an AO3!
Still read to this day.
Me too. I was addicted to everything final fantasy on fanfiction.
HeyItsKeeKee can you explain how to use Fanfiction.net cause a sis can’t work it (Mobile and laptop). I really need to know
one of the only movie where the “good girl” trope is done correctly is A Walk To Remember.
Loved a walk to remember
That movie was everything and actually showed a Romantic, healthy relationship.
Yes! I loved that movie!
Best part, no sex scenes
@@avonjoiyambot5737 I agree ! I only like sex scenes when they are suggested only and not shown. I think revealing sex scenes are very awkward to watch especially when the characters are supposed to be teenagers
While watching this I just felt bad for the people who are asexual and how disconnected they must feel when watching these types of movies where you cant have love without sex
Asexuals can still love people and enjoy sexual scenes in films/movies without actively participating in it
But honestly as an Ace myself whenever this happens in films or books I just shrug it off and skip it while feeling repulsed lol
@@hopelesshaddy3332 Same, I am not young but I still skip through those scenes because, I just don't want to see it. Believe it or not I have never seen or read 50 shades of grey and I am 22!
@@sciencenerd777 lol I see myself in the future acting like that
I always had a feeling something wasn't quite right about me since I never had crushes and never thought people were attractive in "that way," since I was little
Even though I'm a growing teenager I still have the same opinion
wise Human 50 shades of gray is just actual horseshit. bad representation of bdsm, stalking, manipulating, sexual assault, and pretty much rape
I just don't watch these kinda movies. Like you can tell immediately by the trailer that it's gonna be shit. Altho I do admit that there seems to be a lot of sex scenes in tv shows lately (and most of the time straight sex scenes) and that I do find annoying. Like there is no need for that. It's so unnecessary. And I would actually love to see an ace character. Or just more of movies that have no romantic stuff in it (not that the characters have to be ace but that relationships just aren't a huge part of the plot)
Clearly, the most toxic relationship on display here is between Kennie and Not Herbert.
Lmao💀
He talks like he has a cold. Or like he's speaking around a mouthful of Jello.
A girl in my class said this was her favorite movie. I was actually speechless
I've been using Wattpad since launch and I remember when After was being written. I read the first chapter and I INSTANTLY deleted that shit from my library. I can't stand that book or any in the series. There's so many genuinely good authors and books on that app like Sir Rob or kpgcatlover and I've never been able to understand why After got so popular. [definitely bc of fandom support and the fact it was the one, and probably the first, novel fanfic the fandom had seen]. Call me whatever you'd like but I've been saying it since day 1, After and the series is trash that just got lucky based on it's background and the fact people eat up the Fifty Shades, hetero, toxic relationship dynamic like it's cocaine in a 80's night club.
When After first came out I was against reading it. It was so overpopulated. But then one night, I was stupid and was like, let's just see what all this craze is about. That first page sucked me in and I'm surprised you had the opposite effect! Interesting though that happened. I loved the series but I reread them a few months ago, it had been 5 years since I first read them. And oh my god, they are bad. The message they give is horrible. Stay with the abusive guy because you think you can change him? No! I agree it got lucky because of its background. It's sad it's glorified.
I don’t like After because their relationships toxic, in fact, I hate that, I like After because I can relate to it- which yes, I know, isn’t a good thing- but there are so many things that Hardin has said that has almost exactly been said to me, and Tessa’s confusion and struggle and hurt and inability to walk away, I relate to it. No one wants a toxic relationship, and it’s not like the people in them don’t care about each other, in fact that’s the biggest problem, because they love each other so much they desperately want it to work, but sometimes relationships just don’t. But after doesn't sugar coat it or have this whole ‘love solves everything’ mentality that isn’t at all realistic, instead, it shows that no matter how much they try to be better, they don’t actually progress into a healthy relationship until they spend YEARS apart
@@raerivers My biggest complaint is the writing. I think it's poorly executed and the plot is overall bad [take this lightly bc the books I usually read are classic English literature.] It also sends horrible messages to teenagers and glorifies toxic relationships. Not trying to start an argument, I respect that you like them. We just share different viewpoints on them and that's okay.
Soph xoxo Still promotes a toxic relationship because in the end after all the hell they put each other through that, I’m sorry can’t fix still get a happy ending.
@@eclectickells8844 Yes I completely agree with your last point, I really don't want to engage in some internet feud about a fictional couple and I respect that you don't like them. But for me- as someone who read these books while in a toxic situation myself- they helped me realize how much I saw myself in Tessa, and how that wasn't a good thing at all. Tessa's exhaustion, her feeling like her relationship with Hardin was one big back and forth cycle you can't escape, I related to, and I truly don't believe it glorified their relationship because it was a huge part in me realizing I had to get out of my own. If Anna had romanticized their relationship, I would have thought that mine was okay- healthy, even- so maybe the only reason I feel so strongly about them is because of how much the books helped me. I guess it's one of those situations that you need to experience to fully understand? I don't know
Kennie: For my Inuyasha fans out there.
Me: *screaming* Kennie likes inuyasha
Who doesn't like Inuyasha ?!?! If you don't like it we need to talk XD
@@gisellepieternella9006 I totally love inuyasha. I think it is one of the greatest anime I have ever seen.
Giselle Pieternella inuyasha was one of my MANY and I MEAN MANY anime husbands from my youngin years.
i thought we all knew that already akfjsmfsjf
the BEST anime
"I hated his face. I hated his voice." Mood, straight up mood!😂 the accent was trash for someone who is supposed to be British irl
I'm telling you as a Brit, that is how most boys speak in London
altkovac that I can understand. The whole posh and bad acting part.
Shazza am I better get used to it then since I’ll be over there for 10 days in May.
Can toxic relationships stop being viewed as romantic plz
I just wanna know what Harry Styles thinks of this movie
he was not impressed
I think he blocked the writer
He blocked the author on twitter
@@incw.2601 i'm not surprised by that
HE ACTUALLY BLOCKED THE WRITER ON TWITTER LMAO
Hardin: H-
Me, a British boy: _ *n o* _
lol
@Phoebe TonQueen Their acting is not bad but hardin's face always looks he is scrunching so it kinda looks like he is always in pain lol
@Phoebe TonQueen lmao
@@pyreworks5210 I just found that he plays the young voldemort from the sixth harry potter
"I wear black and smiling physically pains me" 😂😂😂😂
It is sad that most Wattpad authors do love to pair abusive men and way-too-forgiving women, and it's not even an exaggeration. The sad thing about is that when you point out the toxic relationship on the comment section, young readers get angry and defend them!!
Really enjoy this series and still wonder how you can multitask having bomb makeup and talk in detail!!
maegan dolorfo That’s too true cause like there are some authors that make “i fall in love with my bully 😍” fanfics and that shit is so toxic and disgusting. I honestly don’t believe that an actual sane human being writes that shit.
With how common it is, I wonder if we have it backwards. Like, the problem isn't that the stories glorify toxic relationships, but that abusive men/forgiving women is so pervasive in our society that they're just making stories out of what they see?
It's like somehow _Beauty and the Beast_ became the archetype for all romance.
Oh...wait. Aren't bad relationships every Disney movie ever?
would you mind reading my book? i’m open for any criticism 😩😩
"This fly bout to get smacked my guy; You are NOT Herbert and you acting like you own the place LIKE Herbert and you about to catch all of these palms and all of these hands."
No fly could ever replace Herbert in our hearts, RIP🙏
"i got a new wig but you can't tell bc it looks like all my other ones"
omfg thats literally me 😂😂
Same! I love a long straight, black number
When he said "don't flatter yourself" in that tone I immediately thought: _oh yeah. This kid probably watches Rick & Morty unironically_ lol
*i watch rick and morty unironically*
but rick and morty is funny...
nessy ness do you know that part where the scientist accidentally turned himself into a pickle? I swear, funniest shit ive ever seen
@@mmaantj yeah hahaha the only part i haven't seen yet is the last season ( season 4)
This dude deffo wouldn’t understand rick and morty humour
7:12 Lmao, I thought I was the only one, I was like "Why couldn't they have hired an actual British person instead of a poor imitator?" come to find out he's actually British 🤦🏻♀️
“The twist is that- *WHEN ALLERGIES FILL YOU NOSE WITH DREAD, USE PUFFS INSTEAD* “
bruh sometimes ads can be funny
Lol I got a airwick ad
As an ace person, I love the fact that you talked about that issue.
I started dating someone who doesn't think sex is a paramount attribute of a romantic relationship, and we've been great!
But the fact that all media portrays it in that way, I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop, especially when I hear other people talk about our relationship without knowing the intricacies of it.
Even when sex is a part of your relationship, it shouldn't be all that it's based upon, a lot of people that I know have put themselves through incredibly toxic relationships because that aspect was used as a tool, instead of mutual companionship.
Thanks though, it was good to hear that from you Kennie! xx
Also, hell yeah Stromae!
Hello fellow Ace! 🙋🏽♀️
I'm an ace as well and I'm happy to hear you found someone ^^ I hope I will to in the future :')
ahhh a fellow ace person!!
I've always loathed media like this. The media that makes sex seem like a priority, and essentially shames virgins. It always made me feel frustrated and disgusted, because I didn't want sex (I still don't and doubt I ever will), and I felt so abnormal and excluded. It's been amazing to discover the ace community and realize I'm not the only one!
I'm also aro... so the way relationships are portrayed in media in general has been a source of frustration for me for years.
My bff is a fellow ace who taught me throughout the years that sex & romance isn’t everything, and I'm glad that this issue has been called out. I get that teens get horny and all but did Hollywood have to cash in on this crap
Didn’t like After when I was 13, sure as hell doesn’t like it now. Wattpad stories are a whole MESS.
The problem with Wattpad is it focuses on the popularity of the book than the actual content....cause I've come across some really good books that are just not popular
Merci Melai name them please? I’ve found like a handful of incomplete gems but nothing good and completez
@@tsubakihanazono do you want a specific genre or is anyone fine?
Merci Melai any one is fine but I love anything romance💜💓❤️
@@tsubakihanazono the redtail is a good one. It's not a romance so far but it's pretty good
I felt that when she said “sMuT” lmaooo
"Don't flatter yourself." I was like BIIISH! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!
I think that's my problem with all these "chick flicks" or whatever... the characters just fall in love! Just like that! And it's sooooo deep, sooooo truuueee, sooooo pure and I'm just there like "huh?" Y'all literally just met.
Sooooo true cause I remember I used to be attracted to a guy for their sob story like "come, let me heal you!"
Great review!
I realised I had to break the concepts of idolising toxic relationships that I'd been made to believe (thanks to media) were the 'best' and most 'fulfilling' relationships only after being in a domestic violence relationship and coming to understand that I am not responsible for a man's anger issues and 'dark past' and it is NOT my job to be the punching bag and 9/10 he won't turn around and say "Wow you changed me, I'm a better person now" and shape up ... because staying with them is enabling them for one, and secondly, because even if they DO ... it'll be between hits to give you a false sense of progress.
That's such a true statement "If you are only attracted to the brokeness in people, you will only attract broken people". You're so gorgeous, thank you.
OMG same, reading the subreddit relationship advice made me realise how relationships actually are and not like the ones in Wattpad
AFTER is one of those books I can’t really bring myself to read no matter how hard I try✊🏾😔
SpILl tHE taE siS as a person who read it on Wattpad a few years ago I can say don’t read it. Looking back on it now I’m traumatized from reading it
It truly is the most toxic ish I’ve ever read in my life. 13 year old me was a dumbass for reading that.
i honestly think most people read it bc it was so popular, and i read the first book to learn whats all about, and hated it SO much. when i read that he cheated on her, and in the book it describes it differently and more cruelly, and i was just done with it. "Dark"was kind of in the same category, i prefered it to After, but it was still bad. If anyone is interested its again with Harry Styles where he's a boxer and basicay stalks tf out of the main character, Bo
Marie P. I read it when I was 10/11. I’m ashamed. It’s probably the reason I’m gay now
I’ve read all four of the published books and honestly I love them so much, I can’t deny that Hardin and Tessa are toxic, because, well, they are, but Anna Todd- the writer- doesn’t glamorise or romanticise it, but it is from Hardin and Tessa’s pov, so it is difficult to express that the author thinks their relationship is toxic without thinking ‘well if the character thinks this, why don’t they break up?’
And then after all four books and the two of them taking YEARS apart, they finally end up in a healthy, happy relationship.
How is her accent better than his like...
Let’s petition for a movie about a girl who tries to heal a broken bad boy and fails. And then she realizes it his problem not hers and she finds someone else.
there is a difference between falling in love with someone's brokenness and loving someone who is/has brokenness? media romanticizes the first and it leads to toxic ways of thinking about relationships.. its a struggle to figure out how to love in healthy ways and support a loved one in their journey of self improvement without trying to act like the savior
I love your quote "When you're attracted to the brokenness in people you only attract broken people." I try very hard never attract broken people because it's toxic and you can't change them no matter how hard you try.
the main charavter girl in all these teen movies always looks exactly the same lol, like mix it up fam.
the white blondes with their black guy friends and the highschool jock/bad boy/popular kid and those three mean girls. honestly the four horsemen of this generation's romantic movie cliches (and its bad-)
In the books, she actually wasn't like this though. She was really rude and judgemental and thought she was better than everyone else when in reality she was the worst of them all.
Bianca P true, she got mad at her mother for being judgmental when she was the worst and literally called every girl at the party a slut for their outfit
Bianca P true, she got mad at her mother for being judgmental when she was the worst and literally called every girl at the party a slut for their outfit
May I ask for a favor, can you aveda Kedavra all their asses my lord?
"I read smut right at the table"
Same sis. Same😂
It’s Kennie JD back with the Kennie J tea ☕️
“I rolled my eyes so hard I almost lost a contact” 😂 I’m using that one
Fanfiction.net was either a gold mine or a mine field💀
My bestfriend and I used to play "fanfiction roulette".
(we'd pick a series and page then just randomly click.)
Our young minds were not ready.😂
Kay Way
Best way to describe it, lol. Some really great fics there, some of my favourites. Ones where they could surpass even the media it came from (though with Twilight that wasn’t hard, lol.).
...And then you had the ones with spelling and grammatical errors, terrible “character” likeness and the worst dialogue. “Fanfiction roulette” 😂👌🏻 Classic.
that actually sounds like a good ass time.
'It's not the duty of a woman to make her partner feel like a man'
- crazy rich Asians
Kennie has now joined someone of my favourite movie commentary youtubers like Trin, Dylan and PrettyMuchIt
Inioluwa Adeboye I love all of them
I only know prettymuchit, should check out the other 2
She cracks me up, her personality gets me laughing so hard
@@nancym3041 trin lovell and dylan is in trouble are both super funny!
The holy trinity omg