A Better Way to Talk About Resilience | Emen Washington | TEDxTAMU
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ส.ค. 2024
- Does resilience look the same for all of us? Does it look the same each time we face a challenge? In this talk, Emem Washington seeks to share the various forms resilience can come in (including forms some might view as quitting or giving up), and why a broader view is necessary, for what it means to be resilient.
Emem Washington is a Success Strategist, Trainer and the Founder of ModaVida, a personal and professional development company. She is also an Author, Recording Artist, and Attorney.
An unapologetic optimist, her favorite things include “blue sky days”, fine-tipped pens of any color, and anything she can write on (yes, napkins included). She is mom to two miracle sons. Get to know her further at www.ememwashington.com. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
"Pushing through looks like pulling out." Amen to that.
The analogy of bending in a storm resonated deeply. Resilience isn't just about endurance; it's about adapting and finding strength in flexibility. Well articulated!
Bending not breaking, that's a valuable lesson for life...
I'm glad we're finally at a place where we can have these conversations about allowing ourselves - and each other - to be treated with a bit more softness and understanding.
There is so much power and satisfaction in just saying "no, I won't do that." To hear that it also fuels your resilience is very reassuring
The mention of mental health in resilience discussions is crucial. It's not just about what our bodies can endure, especially if it's at the cost of our mental health
She does a great job of challenging the traditional notion of resilience. Emphasizing that it can sometimes involve quitting or seeking help is quite refreshing and feels way more humane and realistic.
Understanding that sometimes quitting is part of being resilient opens up a more compassionate view towards mental health and self-care.
The emphasis on mental health and well-being struck a chord. It's empowering to hear discussions that prioritize self-care as an integral part of resilience. Thank you!
resilience is personal and this talk highlighted that beautifully.
Mental health needs to be part of the resilience conversation, glad it was mentioned.
I agree with this so much! To be able to recognize your own capabilities and limitations _before_ you push yourself to the point of breaking is huge and should absolutely go under the "resilience" umbrella.
Loved her story about the palm trees bending in the storm and still being able to produce fruit even if they don't go all the way back to being upright!!
Her point about resilience not just being about "pushing through" but also knowing when to take a step back for mental health resonated with me. It's a perspective we often overlook in our hustle culture and all that's doing is leading to a huge amount of burnout
Hearing about the difference in reactions to personal grief was eye-opening for me
Admitting you need a break or help isn't weakness, it's just another form of resilience. I'm going to try to embrace that message fully.
Loved how practical and relatable the talk was. Resilience redefined!
These perspectives on resilience are truly a breath of fresh air, honestly this is exactly the direction we should be moving towards in terms of addressing mental health and setting personal boundaries.
Resilience as a spectrum, not a one-size-fits-all concept? I'm loving this perspective! Sometimes, quitting can be the smartest move. It's like saying 'No' to the wrong path to make room for the right one.
Your talk challenged the achievement-focused culture beautifully. Resilience is a complex concept, and it's refreshing to hear discussions that embrace the diversity of individual journeys.
This is a really important message to be spreading, especially for those who always put too much on their plate and then don't want to let anyone down.
I never thought quitting could be a form of resilience until now. This talk is like a mental gymnastics routine, flipping my perspective on its head!
Resilience, as you described, is a nuanced journey, and acknowledging individual paths is crucial. Life doesn't look the same for any two people, this includes _all_ aspects of their lives.
I appreciate her talking about how resilience isn't one-size-fits-all. It’s about finding what works for you, whether it's stepping back or pushing through.
I think it's so important to be able to adapt to challenges with flexibility and grace. When we get caught up in absolutes we're really just limiting our own ability to grow and evolve as people.
This is great. Resilience isn't the movie version of the action hero, who starts off strong, gets beat up, then gets stronger and does a final beat-down on the bad guys. I like those movies too! But it's not life. In real life, resilience is just as often water as it is stone: when we pursue our goals, sometimes we flow like water. We grow different channels, stop at obstacles then flow around, stop for a while in place and get deeper... and carve our way right through the stone that stops us.
Also, Emem Washington is the real deal! An amazing woman who is highly resilent herself.
You have such a beautiful way with words. My favorite part: “resilience is just as often water as it is stone”. Sooo good!
And thank you for your kind words.❤️
This definitely challenges the societal norm of pushing through at all costs and that's something a lot of people need to hear.
I don't know why but I got so choked up listening to her talk about how she returned to work so soon after a loss.
The discussion on resilience was eye-opening. It's refreshing to consider strength beyond the conventional 'never give up' narrative. Great insights!
I really appreciated hearing a broader view on what resilience can be. I don't think self-care is advocated for in this way nearly enough. You hear that phrase and think like oh a nice bath or a nourishing meal but it should be so much more.
I think recognizing different forms of strength is pretty crucial in terms of creating a supportive and understanding community. This talk is a great step in that direction.
Love the fresh take on what it means to be strong. The old one's gotten us to some difficult places.
Taking a "break" or pause in life brings soo much growth!!
Yesss!! So often we forget that; I have been guilty of it too.
The acknowledgment that sometimes we have to bend not to break is powerful. Resilience isn't always about enduring; it's about finding ways to adapt and navigate challenges effectively.
Loved the emphasis on mental health and well-being. It's a reminder that true strength lies in understanding our limits and making choices that align with our personal needs.
I liked what she said about how her coming back to work so quickly was her form of resilience. I don't think there's anything wrong with doing things as a way to get through grief and hard times.
I think this is a very timely talk and we could all benefit from looking at this broader view of resilience!
She makes such a good point about how we always tell people to keep going and push through and that they can do it! But sometimes maybe people just need to be told it's okay to quit. We should normalize the latter because I've seen friends and family force themselves to do things that just weren't right until something really, really bad happened to force them to quit.
Your talk made me rethink how I perceive resilience. The acknowledgment that everyone's journey is different, as seen in the story about your mom and colleague, is eye-opening.
This talk made me rethink my definition of strength and honestly I think I needed that more than I realized.
This is a great talk. Resilience should come from knowing and listening to yourself, not bouncing back from trauma as is the norm
I love this approach, I think far too few of us have been taught when to take a step back for the sake of our mental health and the high levels of burnout we've seen since the pandemic are just proof of that
It's so important to remember we all deal with challenges differently. You might be capable of disconnecting your emotions and just getting through a really difficult situation then absolutely crumbling after it's all said and done.
Embracing diverse paths to success and well-being challenges the one-size-fits-all mindset. Thanks for the thought-provoking insights.
The story of Elena Muchina is heartbreaking but essential in illustrating the consequences of pushing too hard. Resilience should be about self-preservation, not just endurance.
Life is a complex puzzle, and resilience is just one piece. We should embrace the diverse ways people navigate challenges. Simone Biles' decision is a reminder that our mental well-being matters.
"The oak fights the wind and is broken, the willow bends when it must and survives." I forget where that quote comes from lol but this talk definitely made me think of that
We all need to engage in this better way to think and talk about resilience.
Oh I love this... especially the part about it how it can be different from one situation to the next as well. What works in one instance might not work the next time, even if it's the same issue. People are so complex and our well-being can change literally from one day to the next.
Strategic resilience is a very cool concept. I've heard that saying about losing the battle to win the war but this is the first time I've really understood what it means.
True resilience can mean accepting when you've had enough and choosing a different route.
Resilience should be about finding balance and listening to our bodies and minds and we need to celebrate individuals who prioritize their mental and physical well-being over societal expectations.
Amen to that!
Loved the talk! The story about the palm tree bending in the storm resonated. It's crucial to recognize the power in flexibility and adapting to challenges.
Simone's decision to quit was, in my opinion, the actions of a champion who was able to honour herself and acknowledge that all wasn't well.
I agree 100%. Thanks for what you wrote!
So many good points in this talk, especially about how different resilience can look from person to person. My mom was one of those people who never stopped, that was just who she was and her way of dealing with things too but her emotional resilience wasn't so good. If anyone needed her to do something that pulled her out of the things she wanted to do, it was like she'd just get so overwhelmed and click over
I think the fact that often we're so achievement focused, unless there's some milestone tangible thing we don't give ourselves the credit for everything else, and then when it comes time to give ourselves some break time we just have no idea!
The story about returning to work after loss hit close. Resilience is deeply personal, and we all have our unique ways of bouncing back.
Yes, everyone has a different way of processing & working through situations.
Yes!! look through Resilience through a "wider lens/veiw!! Palm tree... great visual picture... we bend so we don't break!!
I quit can = grit & resilience!
The palm tree is my favorite. Love that it resonated. Thank you, Shirley!
Such a breath of fresh air, coming from this way of looking at resilience! Your words are like a healing balm that I needed to hear! So many parts of your talk soothed my soul. Thank you sooo much! Perfect timing for me to hear this! Much appreciated!
Great talk! It's about time we redefine what being resilient means cos the old way ain't workin! I mean just look at where it's gotten us 😅😅
I think this really shows how societal expectations can limit our understanding of strength in various situations. So often we just assume what someone in a certain role has to behave like, we don't always appreciate how much more power and courage it takes for them to go against those expectations.
The idea of resilience being asking for help and leaning on others is a more realistic and human definition and I'm all for that.
The concept of losing a battle to win the war resonated. Sometimes, strategic decisions for long-term victory require foregoing temporary wins and that's a perspective shift worth considering.
Resilience is the accumulation of terrible things one has experienced and the strength they've acquired in spite of it.
I agree, we're all different so we need to find what works for us instead of just doing what's expected of us, especially for the sake of other people
the story is heartbreaking. It emphasizes the importance of listening to our bodies and not giving in to external pressures.
The concept of bending but not breaking, like a palm tree, is a beautiful analogy for resilience.
I appreciate the exploration of how resilience can change with each challenge. The more we take on and process the more we grow, the stronger we get. What this version of me can carry and overcome would have killed the version of me from five years ago.
Sometimes, stepping back does more good than pushing through. I wish I had learnt this earlier.
The stories used to illustrate points were very effective. I feel like I really understand what she's talking about.
It's essential to destigmatize seeking help, such as therapy, as part of one's resilience journey.
This is very good advice and ties in so well with setting boundaries, something a lot of people struggle with I think.
We're all unique individuals and it follows that resilience would be personal experience. There's no "right" or "wrong" way.
The comparison between different trees in a storm was insightful. Resilience, like the palm tree bending, teaches us that flexibility can be a powerful strategy in facing adversity.
I really appreciate that someone's out here challenging the focus on achievement based merit... We're all just trying to carve out a little safe space where we can be happy and connect with one another.
I think acknowledging that resilience means different things for different people is a huge step towards fostering empathy and understanding
Loved the story about her colleague's approach to grief. We all have unique ways of bouncing back, and that's something to celebrate.
I used to think resilience meant never giving up and letting all the setbacks and negativity just bounce off you but listening to this talk is making me reconsider
I think talks like this are important for us to expand our understanding of resilience. We should always be working towards a more compassionate and supportive society, and conversations like this help to do so.
Perfectly said in words! Thank You, I agree 100 percent!
So on point! Society is soooo achievement-focused at the cost of personal peace & mental health/wellness. It can & should look different for everyone.
Agreed, Monique. Thank you for your insight.
Truth! Thank You!
Yup, this is definitely a better way
What a thought provoking Tedx talk. Completely challenged my take on resilience, my 2 key takeways ...Its the courage saying No, each one's bouncing back methods can be different. Like Einstein said, Genius is know when to stop. Thank you
Your takeaways are gold. I appreciate your insight. Thank you, Dr. Anu. ❤️
The emphasis on recognizing when to step back for mental health struck a chord. It's a reminder that self-care and resilience often go hand in hand. Great insights!
This was one of the good talks! More power to you!
I'm speechless, the way you talk is really good. I love how you use Palm tree to illustrate resilience
Thank you for listening
There is such a good message here. One of my friends growing up was just the toughest little nut you've ever seen, honestly the amount of emotional toil that she pushed herself through while still being a super high achiever was incredible. Then she had a complete menty b right before starting her first year of college, and afterwards just this total change of personality and reordering of priorities which I imagine would have been incredible cathartic for her but man it was an uqly process that I think could have been avoided
This reminds me of the Japanese art of 'kintsugi,' where broken pottery is repaired with gold. Maybe quitting is our way of filling life's cracks with our unique golden stories.
Resilience is like a secret garden, and everyone has their unique key. Simone used her key to protect herself, and that's a powerful act of self-love. We should all learn to respect our own keys.
I like that analogy of a key. I once heard a quote about a key. It went something like " A key isn't made for just any door, but for the one it is meant to unlock." Thanks for your post.
Resilience comes in different forms. Simone Biles showed resilience by recognizing her limits and making a tough choice. It's a powerful lesson for all of us.
This was a beautiful talk with such an important message, will be sharing this one 💜
I appreciate Emen's honesty about her past mindset and how she's grown to see resilience differently.
True resilience comes from knowing when to push forward and when to step back for self-care.
Perfecto!
Exceptional perspective. Really shifts the meaning of how we could approach life on an individual basis with a far bigger picture.
Thank you.
Amazing talk Emem Washington!!
Thank you so much! ❤️🙏🏾
You're welcome @@EmemWashington !! It was truly beautiful and a thought provoking perspective!!
Spot on with defining resilience, even for those who are trauma-informed trained. Wow! Wonderful and thought-provoking talk! This is one to listen to the full message, not just a fast-forward skim.
Thank you, Ashley. I’m so happy it resonates. ❤
Like everything resilience is something deeply personal and different from one person to the next. Ultimately it's our experiences that make up what it looks like.
“The courage to quit is grit.” That’s the topping for me. The lesson is to always see ourselves as a work in progress and garner from every experience the lessons that make us better. Thank you Emem. This is a new and revolutionary perspective on resilience.
Yes! We are works in progress indeed. Thank you for watching.
Wonderful talk Emem, this is on my save list for future reference.
I’m so glad it resonates
👏👏👏 very well said... people cope with situations and have different perspectives. Others may see and judge too quickly and differently, but if you will look deeper into it, and analyze it more, then you will truly understand its meaning.
Yes, Jenna! Looking deeper is a key point. Thank you.
I agree, when are people just going to allow others to be human. To be accepting of others, that they just might be doing what they need to be doing for them, even if we would need to do it differently.
As a society, we tend to glorify the "never quit" mindset, but it's essential to recognize that sometimes quitting is the bravest choice.