Hello you savages. Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here - chriswillx.com/books/ Here's the timestamps: 00:00 Is Gen-Z in a Mental Health Crisis? 05:13 The Dangers of Unnecessary Therapy 09:20 Gaps Between Social Media & Reality 16:50 How Public Should You Be on Social Media? 23:24 Capturing Memories Instead of Being Present 30:46 The Advice Young People Aren’t Receiving 34:41 Who Are Gen-Z Girls Looking Up to? 38:08 Is Society Coddling Women Too Much? 42:39 Bring Back Selfie Editing Shame 49:04 More & More Women Getting Cosmetic Surgery 52:48 Should Gym Girls Be Posting Their Stretch Marks? 59:14 How Gen-Z Girls Perceive Guys & Dating 1:06:39 Belief That Careers Provide More Meaning Than Family 1:15:54 Do We Actually Live in a Hookup Culture? 1:23:16 Impact of Broken Families on Gen-Z 1:31:26 Where Are the Mainstream Feminists Now? 1:33:07 What’s Next for Freya 1:35:06 Where to Find Freya
Chris - why aren't you calling her for her dishonest used of stats. Boys in the same age range have 44% higher suicide rate. Letting her call this a 'girl problem' is very dishonest of you. Boys in the same age range over the same age range had a 47% increase in suicide rate, not the 3% stat she selected.
the danger of unnecessary therapy is literally one of the topics, while you are also sponsored by betterhelp, a very contraversial therapy. Which is it chris? or are you just willing to take the money and turn the cheek?
I didn’t allow my first son to have social media and now, at 20, he has no interest. I also don’t allow my 10 year old to have social media it is poison.
@@raczykThere’s a difference in allowing kids to use something and using it as an adult. It’s not hypocritical to drink a beer but not allow your son to drink one.
i dont think that is true i think it has helped us see people we would not otherwise meet and empathize sadly it opened the door to toxicity and bullying
I think one of the most damaging things for females in todays society is telling them they should behave like males sexually. It actually hurts women to behave like men, and vice versa, when it comes to courtship and sex. This is the case regardless of one’s political affiliation. The sexes have different sexual systems, stemming from thousands of generations of evolutionary influence. Drawing upon biological or evolutionary explanations for behavior and abiding by traditional gender roles might actually help us when it comes to romantic relationships. The modern-day feminist movement maintains that a well-functioning society should do away with gendered norms. In theory, this would be a good thing; a person should be free to live as they please without being held to expectations based on an immutable characteristic like sex. But then this line of thinking goes too far-if the sexes are truly equal, it reasons, there should be no differences between men and women, including in the realms of dating and sex. Any deviation from this symmetry, or any adherence to gender-typical roles, is seen as chauvinistic or “toxic” of men and belittling of women. The admirable goal of gender equality has metastasized into meaning that men and women are the same, and therefore, any sex differences differences are socially imposed and can be unlearned, or altogether don’t exist. As a result, it’s become fashionable to call into question biology and evolutionary psychology, which is a shame because they offer a truly enlightening perspective into the way we think. Both have become verboten in recent years, tarnished with allegations of sexism, irrelevance, and being in opposition to women’s rights. In actuality, nothing could be further from the truth. One of the greatest myths perpetuated about female sexuality is that women enjoy casual sex as much as men. Young women are encouraged to pursue hooking up because that is what empowered women are supposed to. Those who abstain are seen as unfortunate casualties of a culture rampant with slut shaming and repressive gender norms. Considering everything we know about evolutionary psychology, this doesn’t make much sense. Despite feminism’s incessant prodding that women indulge in no-strings-attached sex, men consistently report greater enjoyment of it, while women experience more negative reactions. After having casual sex, women are more likely to self-report depression, regret, and feeling “used.” Men, conversely, self-report feeling like they had used their female partners. Is there any truth to the idea that social standards influence this behavior? When we look at sociosexuality (which refers to a person’s enjoyment of sex without commitment), in more egalitarian societies, like Norway and Denmark, women enjoyed casual sex more, but so did men, leading to larger sex differences This is not to say that women should cease having casual sex. Women should be free to have as many libidinous encounters with as many different partners as they’d like, if that’s what they choose to do. I’m a strong believer that what’s good for the goose is good for the gander; if promiscuity is socially acceptable for men, then it should be socially acceptable for women, too, and conversely, if it is frowned upon for one sex, it should be frowned upon for both sexes. There definitely still exists a double standard regarding women’s sexuality-for example, that men are free to roam sexually while women must remain chaste to preserve their inherent value as future wives and human beings, more broadly-and even though these attitudes are rooted in evolutionary psychology, that isn’t an excuse to hold women to a different standard than men. A person cannot make good decisions without having all of the information available to them. Currently, only one message is being aimed at women in the mainstream, and unless a young woman has parents, educators, or health professionals in her life-who have not embraced this particular ideology around casual sex-whom she feels she can turn to to talk about these very intimate and in some cases, potentially embarrassing, topics, the only place she will be able to access information will be on the Internet and through exposure to messages in the media. There are, of course, many women who do enjoy casual sex, and many men who don’t, and so long as everything is consensual, it’s no one’s place to judge. My concern is that only one perspective is being promoted as acceptable for young women, once again dictating to women that they should behave like men in order to be well adjusted, yet paradoxically, young men are being made to feel shameful if they behave like men. If a woman is more interested in having committed relationships, that should be completely fine, too. She should not be made to feel as though she is uptight, unenlightened, or a sexual prude. The narrative that sexism and socialization are the most powerful influences on women’s sexual behavior-or lack thereof-leads women astray in several ways. First of all, male sexuality is concordant. This means when a man is turned on psychologically, he’s also turned on physically, down below. Female sexuality, on the other hand, is much more context-dependent, and is lower in sexual concordance. Women may be psychologically turned on, but not physically, and vice versa. It can take a bit of extra time for a woman to get warmed up. From an evolutionary perspective, this ties into women’s greater selectivity when choosing their mates. For instance, a woman’s brain processes sexual cues differently, depending on where she is in her ovulatory cycle. A recent study using functional MRI demonstrated that women possess increased efficiency in inhibitory brain function when they are potentially fertile. This is adaptive because it allows a woman to be more cautious when evaluating a potential partner at times when it is more likely that she will become pregnant. It’s not appropriate or helpful to use male sexuality as the standard, because women’s bodies don’t operate this way. Women who believe female and male sexuality are no different will feel pressured to perform similarly to their male partners in the bedroom. When they don’t or can’t, they will internalize this, thinking there is something wrong with them. It may be the twenty-first century, but a man should still be required to make the first move. Initiating contact contact or romantic interest is a small act demonstrating he is willing to invest in her. As a woman, you do not want your boyfriend to treat you like one of the guys, even if that sounds commendable in the name of gender equality, because doing so requires him to put in much less effort. You want to know that if and when the day comes that you’re heavily pregnant and immobile on the couch, he will bring you what you need to ease your discomfort, instead of muttering that you should get it yourself. Even if you have no plans to have children, you want to ensure that your partner will prioritize you. We have not yet severed our modern-day sexual behavior from its history. It’s a system that has served us quite well, considering that we exist today. Acknowledging as much doesn’t mean women will get the short end of the stick, nor does it require perpetuating the cliché that women should be sexually submissive and men should be sexual aggressors. If anything, this knowledge can be used to the advantage of both sexes. Women have been told to take charge in their romantic lives as a sign of independence, confidence, and female strength. While I don’t think women should be sitting around, waiting for a guy to send a text, there is something to be said for letting him come to you. You want to give signals that you are interested, but not too interested-sexually appealing, but not too forward. Finding the right words to start a conversation can be hard, especially if it’s with a stranger. Requiring men to, at minimum, initiate interest will help to weed out those who are just going to waste your time. It also means that he values you. A man who isn’t required to invest will almost by default be interested. Beyond that, I’d advise women to not play hard to get. If you are interested in someone and they ask you out, say yes. As for men, don’t apologize for being masculine. Pull your weight in a relationship and be gentlemen. Some women may find holding doors open and gestures of the like unnecessary, but they shouldn’t be offended. Truly successful relationships require a healthy and accurate understanding of not only one another, but human behavior; otherwise you will end up with a partner who is only telling you what you want to hear.
Sam Vakn said social media are made in narcissistic way, and in isolatring way.....he says its anti-social media, because the creators also are antisocial, and creators are all men he said none of the creators or owners is a woman... but nerd anti-social men. Also Tristan Harris said the social media is made by design, also the behavior is expected, because they hired thousands of attention engineers to make it certain way.
It's really creepy that the only advice men are ever getting is self-improvement and the only advice women are ever getting is self-acceptance. We should strive to give everyone a more balanced outlook.
@@AniMeLoVeR23451 true, we need to self reflect (a good thing church tends to encourage, self reflecting and pondering morality), and also consider the needs of others (first two greatest commandments, golden rule)
Completely agree. Both genders need both self acceptance and self improvement. I am constantly defending Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan to other women. They've helped me a lot, particularly Peterson. And it makes me sad that so many people lump them in with Tate, who is sex trafficker and terrible person. A lot of people don't seem to like self-reflection.
maybe on some of these topic if not many. there are that much difference between men and women. I mean yes man and women are different sexes, sex is real, but we might be the same species and not one is bear and one a fish. so maybe. I struggle for some time, and sometimes still do, to express this to young people. Workwise i come in contact with a lot of people between 15-25. And the balance between your are okay as you are love yourself and you are not okay as you are improve yourself is difficult. Cause these are somewhat exclusive. If everything is okay why would you improve and if there is something to improve you arent perfect maybe not even good. And it doenst have to be self hatred but at least some selfdisappointment
Thanks for pointing out the problem but can you provide a solution? Social media is here to stay, it's unreasonable to simply say "social media = bad" Sure, we can use it less often but you're living in a fantasy world if you think that'll fix all our problems.
While things did get worse after smart phones, much worse, the problems were already there. But men arent allowed to talk about it, even if they have a daughter. So women will have to sort this one out all on their own.
Putting aside the monetary value of holding attention, in whatever way possible - often in a cynical way: Doesn't social media simply amplify and present us with existing competition behaviors between women?
I agree unfortunately this cancer has affected a lot of age groups and will soon if not have already affect other more traditional groups and religions I’m from turkey and it have made it already to my borders and has infected women with the same shit the western countries are going through so I when men are getting their passports I always say your leaving to find the same shit you are running away from
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains how easy is to brainwash human brain especialy in childhood, or at young age, because subconscious mind is created in childhood. Because when you watch a tv or screen of computer, and see things moving on the screen, the brain freezes for a while, it creates a state of alpha in brain a hypnotic state of brain, it opens the door from conscious mind into subconscous mind, and person becomes more suggestible to information. It´s like installing program into Ipad or computer a good valuable progarm or bad program. Human brain works as computer. What happens is the girl wants to be a good person, has good values of the conscious mind, but she is not realising that in her subconscious mind are installed all the negative beliefs, or programs. Dr. Bruce Lipton explains that until you reprogram the subconscious mind púrograms, you can not fulfill your conscious mind values and you positive wishes and desires. But of course if you practice meditation or metacognition, you are more self-aware, but most people don´t know the meditation or metacognition techniques. or they don´t realize that their brain is hacked by the media But he teaches people techniques how to reprogram the subconscious mind in positive way, or changing habits, thoughts, and beliefs etc.
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains how easy is to brainwash human brain, especialy in childhood, or at young age, because the subconscious mind is created in childhood. Because when you watch a tv or screen of computer, and see things moving on the screen, the brain freezes for a while, it creates a state of alpha in brain a hypnotic state of brain, it opens the door from conscious mind into subconscous mind, and person becomes more suggestible to information. It´s like installing program into Ipad or computer a good valuable progarm or bad program. Human brain works as computer. What happens is the girl wants to be a good person, has good values of the conscious mind, but she is not realising that in her subconscious mind are installed all the negative beliefs, or programs. Dr. Bruce Lipton explains that until you reprogram the subconscious mind púrograms, you can not fulfill your conscious mind values and you positive wishes and desires. But of course if you practice meditation or metacognition, you are more self-aware, but most people don´t know the meditation or metacognition techniques. or they don´t realize that their brain is hacked by the media But he teaches people techniques how to reprogram the subconscious mind in positive way, or changing habits, thoughts, and beliefs etc.
@@MS-nm2kt I was looking at moving to asia for this reason, but I can see that the same behaviours are already showing up there too. It's affecting anyone with a smartphone.
That very much depends on whom you consider a male role model. There are some pretty big names in the manosphere that completely lack any integrity or virtue and a lot of young men copy and paste their values (or lack thereof) onto their own lives, which is sad. But I agree there are too few good female ones.
@@Sisterlisk you'd think so, but judging by the amount of followers they have between them, I'm not convinced. I mean it's not hard to see why, when you're an angsty 18 year old guy, that's facing rejection or failure and you see a 'successful' older guy offering you cheat codes to get everything you deem valuable, if you only join his online program...🙄 Hook, line, sinker.
Yeah after they find themselves on the wrong side of 30 and they don't have legions of white knights stepping in to save them from all their fatherless decisions
Superdisco - well said! But it's worse than that... By pandering and soothing to youngster's needs (and making money off of it), it's preventing growing up, meeting and over coming adversity, stopping independence because it's creating ever lasting dependency... Social Media - truly an opioid drug for the masses...
It’s sad people aren’t learning how to socialize irl. Trying to befriend anyone in-person is incredibly hard now. They start to think you’re creepy for asking get-to-know-ya questions. Then of course they’ll reflexively share their socials with you, which ironically reveals too much personal information.
I'm not sure if all of this is social media influence. I find it invasive when upon first meeting someone basically interviews me about my background. Let's just exchange names and talk about a shared interesting subject first. I don't think that type of questioning has ever been comfortable to people. But maybe it's a bit different where you are, I come from a pretty private culture. And yeah I share basically nothing whatsoever on my socials, less than you would find out by just looking at me irl.
@@Noelciaaaagreed, part of the getting to know people irl thing is remembering that personal info is a resource you should save only for those who have earned your trust. Over sharing personal info, ironically, is a very online thing since most people feel a okay revealing personal shit to strangers who they may or may not ever see again. In real life, you go slow because they stakes are higher. You could reveal something embarrassing to a person with loose lips, or secretly dislikes you, or is of bad moral character who wants to manipulate you. You never know what to expect, and for that reason you will want to withhold too much until you are certain as to what you have.
It’s sad gen z people don’t even seem to believe millennials that socialising 15 years ago really was awesome, and it really is gone. People had a way higher base level of confidence and flair. It was a completely different experience of life. It started to fall away as censorship and identity movements took over, which most of my generation got sucked into, and gen z people don’t seem to be aware there was a much nicer world before when people weren’t always looking for a way to catch you out for perceived moral transgressions and people could fight and make friends again afterwards. I mean we used to have parties where stuff really happened that people would be talking about for years, in a good way, and if we mention then to gen z people then they are all freaked out. It’s so sad. It’s a huge cultural retreat.
I had a girlfriend who turned out to be a covert narcissist. She engaged with an online therapist who was analysing me dependant on what my girlfriend was saying. Needless to say it made our relationship worse. I eventually left. Stay away from these cranks
Used to be common knowledge to not date someone in therapy. Wait until they’re healthy enough to stand on their own two feet. The problem is people with no serious problems going to therapy and the therapist needs to find a problem to talk about.
@@KatKhatibi It should not be an issue if the therapist is competent. It isn't the therapists job to validate or have opinions about people in their patients' lives. In fact the therapist's job is to challenge the person's thinking.
The problem is that society is so polarized. There’s no balance in anything and has to be black and white, the world without grey area is a terrible world to be in
@@seminolekilla did I say that everything needed a grey area or did I say that the world as a whole lacks grey area? Instead of looking for an argument digest what I said. Also there’s already grey areas on murder, you have to decide if it’s self defense on not which inserts grey area. What if the person is trespassing on your property and threatening you? You’re allowed to killed them if you have a lawful firearm, so there’s your grey area. For rape there’s a grey area, it’s hard to consider consent if both parties are drunk and they’ve been having sex but this time the woman wasn’t totally down to do it. It’s up to a judge or jury to decide if there’s enough to consider it rape or not.
As a college professor, I see it firsthand. The whole political, social media and dating practice are destroying relationships and confidence in younger generations. It is both genders - not just women. Big business and influencers need to be identified and rejected.
i worked at university as well, and i am astounded how many people come in with good grades in school, getting into med school and doing well but cant get any confidence out of it. Dont know how do manage any relationships properliy, friends, roommates, dates, partner and professional ones. maybe because i came from lower income household i felt like i was boss when i got accepted into med school. i mean so was everybody else, but i never saw it as a competition because once i was in, and if ai graduate i am a physican nobody can take that from me.
the term influencer, to me as a 41 year old man in the UK, makes a little bit of sick appear in my throat, imagine wanting to be influenced I mean, people cant even create their own opinion these days its ridiculous.
Phones are slowly killing us. Been preaching this for at least four years. I’ve finally got my usage in check and boy it’s like my eyes have been opened again.
My granddaughter is 16. I've noticed that these kids don't actually TALK to each other. The kids get off the bus together but they're all on their phones texting someone somewhere else!? 😢
I take away all my kids devices the two hours immediately after school when they get home. From 3-6pm they may only eat, read, sleep, exercise outside or take a nap.
@@TokyoTaisu that's a great idea. I don't believe they can have their phones turned on at school either. Luckily she loves to come over and visit us often, even though I make her leave her phone off while she's here.💗
I think this is a good thing. All of us are eventually going to live in virtual worlds because the virtual worlds will be more miraculous than anything in our real one. Now is the time to train our kids to become one with their devices..... sort of like an adjustment period.
As a clinician in the field, the problem pervades the (mostly female) therapists around me. They themselves post about their mental health challenges, then foster group sessions that basically glorify the disorders, and make a community that is impossible to leave. It seems like the clients don't know that it is ok to make progress. They stay because they make friends there, then sometimes even get secondary trauma from those around them. I do everything I can to operate on an "up-and-out" model. I want to elevate, teach some skills, then send them on their way. If they come back, we'll troubleshoot, but the goal is for life to continue for them with some improvement. I don't want to see their faces again. My field is saturated with spinelessness and too many positive feedback loops.
I remembered this one time a cardinal landed right in front of my car and my phone camera took so long to open that by the time that it did the bird had flown away. Made me think of the the phrase, you missed the moment by trying to make it last forever.
It’s like the people who go to a concert just to record it on their phone. Life is happening right in front of them, but the constant need to have an excuse to fiddle with the phones is making them miss… all for a small grainy video with poor audio that no one is ever going to watch.
@@Soxfandan yes! Every time when I want to take my phone and start recording a piece of a concert, I make a mental note for myself that the whole show will be accessible online in a much better quality, so there is no need to record. Same with sightseeings - there are million beautiful shots of Eiffel Tower, the Pyramids, Asakusa temple etc. available, I don’t need to go through the crowds of tourists to take my own personal one.
Well, it's not really hard to imagine. We've all been influenced by "social media" even throughout history especially through newspapers and radio. But now it's more wide-reaching, frequent, exaggerated and intense, so of course we're not responding well to it. We're just trying to fulfill our basic human needs for community, security, amongst other things. This is across all demographics. So no, not hard to imagine at all.
In the 80s 90s, and prior, you asked a girl for her number, and if she like you and gave it to you, she'd be thinking of 'you', and you only! Today, this has gone out the window, because of choices due to social media. Therefore men...."Learn to seek your happiness by limiting your desires, rather than in attempting to satisfy them."
And with men and boys the same problem occurs, only more due to internet porn. I bet it also affects women and their apparent "hypergamy" also. Internet porn has been said to be moving us towards Polygamy and polygamous societies are said to be unstable ones, with more insecurity and violence.
The don't have many options. It is even worst than that. All of them are entitled and think that they deserve the top 10% of men. Average women don't want average men.
When Jordan Peterson referred to that study on Tender- he was referring to one data point. There are other studies that show 90% of all people online do not find a relationship. Which means online dating is not working out for most people (both women and men). And yet another study that shows womens desirability decreases after 18 years old, which would indicate men are also engaging in hypergamy online. This victim mindset is ridiculous… talk girls your age in real life… that’s the solution.
The last few years i have realized.. people just do whatever they are told and believe whatever they are told to believe. Free thinking is a rarity that is only getting more rare.
You're not wrong. I'm not talking about a specific political party here, but you can pretty easily figure out if someone is an actual person or if they're a drone by asking about their political stances. There's a massive demographic of both democrats and republicans that hold every single political stance as their political party, because everyone around them thinks the exact same way and they don't question anything. If someone is pro choice, pro trans kids, pro social programs, anti-Catholic, they live in a democratic area. If they're anti-the aforementioned stances, they live in a republican area. A lot of people, who are more like drones than actual people, don't even question any of these stances they have. It is actually crazy how few people can think for themselves. Hardly anyone is a moderate anymore that has their own opinions.
I don't know shit for certain. Except what I know for certain. And even then, I'm not really certain. Is reality real? Are you alive? What is alive? Is this 'free' thinking? Is this the 'free thinking' you're talking about? Is anyone truly free, thinking or otherwise? I'm more enraptured with the questions than the answers at this point. I'll just do what I will with what I think is true for now. Until I know differently. Then I'll do what I will with that. The evolving nature of experience and consciousness is absolutely horrifying, sometimes. But, I'd rather face my fears than shrink from them, for whatever that's worth. For the record, everyone should forgive everyone else, and then protecc themselves and their loved ones as much as they can from what they know are bad experiences.
Since when has there ever been a unity between men and women....? The division exists precisely because men and women are not the same and are competing in the market.
@@Hooga89 You accidentally said it. Men and women didnt use to compete with each other. They use to compliment each other. But you are very right, in modernity, men and women do compete.
@@worndown8280 Men and women have always competed with each other, women were just discourged harder from competing prior to the 1960s, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. And no, women and men have never "complimented" each other either, that's just another fiction.
As a member of Gen Z I couldn't be more happy that this is being talked about. The point she brings up about therapy culture is really important too. The texting service for therapy is horrible because you don't have the opportunity to develop a therapeutic relationship. Without that it's simply someone justifying your actions or affirming you constantly. Which isn't productive for anyone.
Yea, I feel bad for the kids growing up with the internet everywhere. No where for them to go where they don't have to worry about screwing up. Their anxiety has got to be off the charts. It used to be just school, but nowadays kids can't screw up around their friends either, photos, screenshots and social media last forever.
not taking responsibility ensures you'll remain in the same spot women tend to blame everyone but themselves, but so do a lot of the boys trained by w l f d worldviews
@@benchristenson2280 I don't get all this false doom and gloom situations given by the red pill towards women. A way greater percentage of women must have healthy social lives with good people compared to men. Average looking women in their 40's still have lots of options on dating apps if they have a nice personality if they were willing to get to know dudes further away from them etc... Red pill is more about coping than it is telling the 100% truth these days honestly
Young men have been committing suicide and generally dealing with depression for years, no one seemed to care. Some girls start to have a worse time and it’s the worst thing in the world. Not so after equality of outcome now, are we? Funny that.
Yeah, I don't feel bad for them when their side of the coin frequently misrepresents the actual data to make it look like they have it worse when often they don't. Yeah, I have a doomer wojak pfp the detractors can fucking cry about it.
It's called social media women are constantly comparing themselves to one another plus they are hooking up with guys who genuinely don't care...simple 🤙🏾
When they push all the good men away by generalizing them all as bad, they shouldn't be so shocked when it's only bad men left around them because those men ignored what they were saying.
@@SpecterVonBaren They are only getting what they wanted, and they still complain. And the rest of us men can't seem to escape their whining even though we aren't with them. 😔🤷♂
It's about getting a photo nothing more. Everywhere you go people are taking photos. I remember when it started and I would make ugly face for the photo and people would get mad. Good 😂
100% it’s social media. I’ve noticed that so many women can’t go anywhere without posting to social media. I’ve gone out to eat with women and as soon as all of our food arrived I started eating. Meanwhile they started taking pictures. As if the food was more important to their followers than them. They found it amusing that I was the only one eating and not taking pictures. Meanwhile I found it odd that they were taking pictures and not eating.
You’re not special ❤ having food is a privilege and wanting to commemorate the moment that you spend eating good food prepared by a chef in a beautiful place with hopefully a beautiful partner (M or F) should be a moment to celebrate and remember. If you don’t like photos in general, sure. But truly what’s wrong with wanting to capture life’s most beautiful moments? We all struggle in life someway or another, there’s better reasons to put someone down for than this
@@Lizaskz you don't need to take pictures and film something to enjoy it. How many times have you gone through you phone gallery and looked out on old photos? Also if everything is "special" and need to be celebrated, nothing really is.
In actuality it's people's way of dealing with social media. I use it every day, don't post anything (And never have), don't get into that comparison bubble and just read up on news. You are good as long as you realize that most is fake and what's not fake just happens and that you can't do anything about it. Dealing with social media is like dealing with reality since it's been pushed into our daily life. To understand social media is to understand how humans function. If you aren't capable of that, don't use it. On a large scale, as most aren't, I overall have to agree with you though.
As a father of two young daughters this seems like one of the most important topics to know and do something about. Very impressed by this conversation. Thank you both.
Daughters are on phones, and mums are on phones. You just have to have that online recognition to justify your existence. Get real, stop looking inwardly at your phone, and start looking outwardly at the world.
Dude if you look around EVERYONE is on their phones regardless of gender.....even my 65 year old dad who complains about 'young people being on their phones all the time' is on his phone a lot.
Maybe if fathers were more involved their daughters lives it wouldn't be like this.... oh wait the moms voted for a system that makes it easy to kick dad out and fleece him for cash and prizes
Freya really is a perfect medium to communicate these topics, to the young girls of the west. Because she doesn’t come across amped/hyper passionate, like so many young contributors do today, it’s calming just hearing her speak and seeing her demeanour, which I would assume for young girls is vastly needed.
I went on a 2 weeks road trip with my Harley, I documented it in my journal and took pictures on my Polaroid camera and attached them with a paper clip. The pictures are average quality but they can’t be edited or taken again, because of the gloss they can’t be scanned or even retaken on my iPhone. The colour are washed out and they are a bit bland but they represent a moment in time.
Awesome idea. There's something special about those old Polaroids. Lo-Fi movement loves them. I have my granddad's Land Camera, but the film is very expensive at $20 USD for just 8 exposures. Might take my old Pentax KM with me out to the northwest this summer. B&W 35mm film is still cheap and the landscape is pretty much made for it.
@@InvestAndGrow2020oh yeah bro because getting on your moral high horse about this stuff due to being 'vindicated' doesn't do anything good for society, not that you want a good society you just want to feed your ego that you are 'right'.
We all thought fashion and magazines were the devil before social media came out, I’m not surprised the negative impact it’s had on women and girls. The young lads I talk to in my climbing gym are equally as affected now. They are shaving their arms and bodies and are so worried about what people think of them. Pushing the ‘female’ narrative on the world is doing no one any favours. Man up lads, stay strong and hairy it’s what everyone needs!!
Young men are beyond obsessed with their image. In some instances, young men seem to obsess over their image more than young women. Young men are attracting the attention of older, gay men, and they don't understand why.
Im a Gen Z girl, 2001. I didn't get a phone until I was 16/17 and dont have tiktoc, insta ect. I had a father in the military for 20 years since 2001, and it was constant moving and always adapting to uncomfortable situations. He retired in 21 and im thankful that nothing too terrible happened when he went on deployments in Afghanistan. I'm thankful I have wonderful parents. They have been happily married since 2000 and they were high school sweethearts. My parents both came from large families that didn't care about them and didn't care what they would do after high school. My Parents wanted to raise their kids differently from how they grew up and taught me to not be a victim and to just better yourself and toughen up. It's scary how my generation is so weak, I want to find a husband who reminds me of my dad in values/morals. I think I might have met someone like that :) .
@@jimluebke3869 nah just the truth. We let men and women off the hook all the time for personal choices. Thats what life is, a series of choices. Currently we hold few personally responsible. Maybe you are ok with that. I am not.
“There’s something nostalgic about only having a memory of things” I mostly agree with everything you guys are saying. Especially the social media aspect. Though as someone who was raised in the 90s and has almost no videos or photos of the first 20ish years of my life, I’m making an effort to take more videos. Thanks for this thoughtful dialogue about important stuff
Girls made these same arguments in the 1980's, complaining of being influenced into making bad decisions outside of their control, no personal accountability.
I have to say that Orwell noted as well as Frank Herbert in God Emperor of Dune that women are the sex with a bit more zealotry and fervor for ideologies. So if society tells you as a woman to act a certain way, to keep things peaceful, cohesive, and to stay in the loop with other group members, women will do what society and other women tell them to do and sometimes with extreme ideological fervor. This lines up with biology and anthropology because of how women need groups to help raise children and that’s how women socialize with each other. It’s actually quite rare to meet women who are willing to rebel against society. So as much you may think it’s an issue of accountability, which in some aspects it is… but if culture only tells you one thing and your parents are assholes so you don’t care about listening to them, have you actually had anyone tell you properly how to act? Has anyone even modeled it properly for you? My mom told me I should dress like Madonna and Selena with the bustiers and jean jackets at 14. I thought she was crazy. She said I was boring. There isn’t proper modeling of appropriate behavior at home, in society, in culture, in media. If you’re inundated with a message, no matter how rooted you are, you will question yourself if you are going against the inundation. The gaslighting is unreal. From family, “friends”, society, media. It’s hard to sift through all the information. And even harder if you were left to raise yourself.
TH-cam you are the absolute devil for deleting comments. I’m literally defending women because of the gaslighting they get from family, friends, society, and media and you delete my comment. TH-cam hates ppl.
Pill popping should be avoided unless absolutely needed Its a destructive hole to go down and does not address the route problem and merely creates an additional highly addictive problem
I'm 30, met a 24 year old girl who was amazing, intelligent, funny, smart and witty, had great taste in music art and clothing, really really pretty. I honestly fell in love with her but it didnt work out, i had to leave the country for work and she wasnt ready for a serious relationship. Anyway, her biggest problem was her lack of resilience and fortitude. She couldnt handle negative emotions - she was convinced she had a mental disorder and her doctor had agreed she was bipolar or had an emotional issue. Maybe she did, but i remember helping her through some hard days and her opening up and telling me she had never thought about handling stress the way i was advising her to - she had always just assumed anxiety = something is wrong with me. I hope shes doing well.
Guy, you absolutely not get with someone that doesn't have themselves together. Most of the time, you'll be the one that has to deal with their issues instead of themselves and you'll become their therapist instead of a partner. It isn't fair to you to deal with someone else's problems that they aren't confident enough to try and handle themselves
The whole idea of snow white not needing the prince, ok she doesn't need to rely on him but it's a hard cold miserable existence to be alone. She needs nobody will lead to a sad lonely life but that's the goal the image now. Women don't need men !!! Everybody who's emotionally healthy needs other ppl because we are social animals. We need love trust and connection. The idea we need no one is the psychopaths dream
@@matthewguzda4075 Pretty much. I don’t really see the point without someone to come home to. In my experience everything is better with a significant other. I think a lot of people don’t understand what it takes to be in a relationship. Compromise, commitment, respect, the smallest amount effort all seem to be a bridge to far for many. The payout from the effort is priceless.
@@mi5jason I'll tell you something man, when ppl are on their death bed and want to tell others there what they are thinking it's often " I love you" . Which to me is obvious yet still ppl feel the need to say that and the reason is is because it matters. We need to express how we feel. There needs to be an ear to the lips. Yin and yang. You know I love you but I need to say it because it's what I genuinely feel in my soul. I love you. Weather that's a person or a cat or a dog we all need to be noticed in this world. We were here. We were alive and lived.
Bible saw that coming, but nobody believes this old book. So many ancient but universal stories in there about people in their proper and in their pathology. But nah, who would've want to believe this stuff.
I was a teen in the late 2000’s and in my experience every step towards this social media dystopia has felt like a self imposed hell for likes, follows, attention, validation, and projecting a false image. We as individuals have created this environment we are now in through our choices and behaviors. Companies are just as happy as ever to make money off of addictions and weaknesses but it’s users that are the problems and users that suffer the most.
1:29:11 Even beyond broken families...for non-broken families, I think many Gen-Z girls have moms that are conflicted and it affects their daughters. The working moms aren't sure if they should've worked for the past 10-15 years b/c it took so much time away from their kids and families, while the stay-at-home moms aren't sure if they made the right life choice b/c they see so many other late 40s, 50 yr old women with successful, productive careers of their own. This is especially the case in the upper-middle class and up, the suburbs where kids buy therapy and girls want cosmetic surgery and the such. I'm kind of describing a female mid-life crisis in both those cases of Moms. Either way, IMO I suspect that their daughters can sense, then learn and unknowingly mirror their mothers' conflicted inner self and lack of assuredness.
No. I am 53 and was a stay at home mom till my girls went to high school I have no issues with self-worth, but yet both my girls suffer from anxiety and depression. Their dad and I monitored the phones as best we could went they were in high school. But it's almost impossible to keep a teenager away from phones. It really is social media and how the algorithms work against young girls and boys for that fact.
Interesting thought. But I have home schooled both my girls in grade school for kindergarten and sixth grade. Both were socially accepted all through school. played sports, dance the whole nine yards. I guess my point is even the "normal" family unit has this issue with the gen Z girls. @@three_owl_night
This entire podcast is talking about female-female competition in the context of the super-charging effect of social networks, without talking about it.
Correct. Even the lowest of female influencers can make TONS of money. My friend was a lawyer and she did the contracts for influencers. The money that these girls are bringing in is outrageous. But, it makes sense considering that store are closing and influencers are the new sales reps.
It's funny how porn was slammed for objectifying women yet social media isn't getting nearly the same amount of backlash. And feminism only wants to blame men for women's misfortunes?
I wrote a book called "the graysonian ethic" to my son (and got it published), and two chapters relate to personal failure: "failure is an option" and "when you make a mistake". Both emphasize the fact that failure is a multifaceted thing, it sucks but it can be beneficial and what matters when you do fail is to figure out what you're going to do about it. I mention it because of the discussion of the way pain and failure and risk are made to be the worst thing that can possibly happen and the key is to avoid it at all costs when in reality you just need to figure out how to be better tomorrow.
Also, a therapist saying they’re like a “bestie” is them misrepresenting themselves. It’s a lie. A therapist is not a friend. A friend doesn’t charge money, and doesn’t end the relationship when the payment stops. And I disagree, we don’t need more therapists and more therapy. People need friends, family, activities, a purpose, work, sunlight, mental stimulation, art, poetry, etc. and the outdoors. Looking for a therapist as a substitute for friends and getting a life is not going to work. And WHY do so many children and adults now need therapy ? A therapist goal should be to put themselves out of work, not 24/7 access in exchange for $$. And are they also pushing hey, buy this product from me for $$$ and it will solve all your problems . . .
I've met therapists like that. They're simply professional enablers & justifiers of women's shitty behavior, week after week, in perpetuity. My ex's therapist is this person.
Healthcare gives free access to people that are paid to listen to narcissistic gibberish then say "maybe you're a victim" then they apply for government funds and the therapist continues to bill insurance. If it were cash payments fewer people would sign up.
The increase in young female su i cide is a concern and shouldn’t be ignored. However, the overall rate for males is still multiple times higher than females. the 75 and older male su i cide rate is something like 5x that of female rate (or 500% more, how’s that for shock). Again, I’m not discounting any group in my comment, just that using a statistic that provides shock value versus the societal magnitude of su i cide rates is what I don’t like.
Reminds me of a shock value PSA that pointed out “25% of homeless people were women!”… or in other words 75% are men. I’m not even bother that all of western society is centered around catering to women, I’m just irritated that millions of people still have the gall to pretend it’s the opposite.
no but you have to be responsible too... yes male suicide rates are through the roof... perhaps that could of been prevented... if girls suicide rates is increasing it could be useful to nip it in the bud but it gets out of hand... it could equally be a seasaw effect, where as mens suicide rates decrease womens increase due to the nature of the men and womens roles in society considering evolution and the sexual marketplace
I disagree. Therapists are obligated to give in to gender ideology legally right now. They will lose jobs if they even suggest that a patient may have other underlying pathology. That alone is enough to drive someone crazy
Just saw a documentary about how the Therapy profession has been overrun by woke Marxist ideologies like critical race theory. You can't even work in the field unless you subscribe to that. So that's not going to improve anything.
@@zaullizalde365As a man and a medical psychotherapist for adults of decades, a) it's not a good time to be a serious therapist at all. What passes for 'therapy' here would be described as the most *collusive* and unchallenging, unprofessional stuff in my trade. In my trade, ENDING therapy is discussed from the very beginning of therapy -- I don't know where to start, really b) The vast majority of the time we don't discuss gender. c) Therapy as a whole, even bona fide well trained therapy, is and has become less man-friendly. It is indeed more difficult to engage us. The worsening (but not the origin) is in part due to the establishment pushing the idea that our mental health problems are due to 'toxic masculinity', part of which is 'machoism' leading to 'not talking about your feelings'. Thankfully most of us see this as the grossly mistaken generalization that it is, and new movements have started. However many new 'magic pills', like weight-lifting therapy, do not actually address men's problems even though they alleviate symptoms.
Anyone with 1/2 a functioning brain cell knows social media is a death knell to many kids. While I think the internet is one of man’s greatest inventions I’m also sooooo glad the internet didn’t exist when I was kid growing up. I was in my mid 20’s when I first got online using AOL, Compuserve, and Prodigy. Watching the internet unfold and now the negative effects it has on people is a bit depressing. The internets positives are sadly reduced exponentially by its negative uses.
I'm a few years younger than you. The internet was a great place until about 2005. At that point high speed internet became ubiquitous, images and multimedia flourished, modern social media was born, and it turned into a corporate cesspool.
The guest says that social media pressures young women, but this is a bit of a cop-out, and also lets their parents off the hook for giving kids a family life where their most exciting activity is staring at a phone.
Yes, concerned parents enroll their kids in lots of activities, like sports. If the kid is out playing hockey or soccer there's much less time and energy for social media.
I am a software engineer and naturally I spend my working time in front of screens, recently I have redesigned my living and bed room to be screen free zones, music comes from vinyl, tv has been replaced with board games, and a nice shelf of books, it has been life changing so far, having people over and just talk, no youtube no "hey look at the newest xyz", just having a good time
how many guys have stopped caring and decided to just stay away from them? how many of us has reached the point where we realise they're not worth it? and how many still hold out hope that we could be the lucky few and fiind a decent one? or hope that the culture will change for the better?
Who needs a decent one? I've had many awful ones and they still made me very happy. Bottom line you guys all need love but are rejecting women as not good enough...that is the switch of gender roles completely. Your fault for internalizing conservative 'philosophers'.
@@Up-hill-Battle you guys are so cute. Im' gen-x...i dont think submissive guys really existed among us to be perfectly honest. I've had many women..probaly 80% were 'bad girls' who cheated on me for sure or very likely looking back as an older guy...who cares. I didn't know at the time, what I knew was I had hot girlfriends to go out to eat, to weddings, to party with then come home and sleep with. All my friends did, we just tried to marry the best one eventually if/when we wanted kids.
Agreed. Imagine being that hot and complaining about how you're treated on social media. Guarantee she is treated better in her life than 99% of people
This was my ex. I was with her for 8 months-her bs gave me 24/7 anxiety. You have to be strong and pick these traits out early on and avoid these types of people at all cost.
@@jonkybeats same here man. Hate to be a sexist, but from what I can tell there's a whorle lot more of them than girls who can be reasonable, logical, and straightforward enough to be in a relationship with Granted, we've all got problems and I wasn't any good to be in the relationship I am referring to, but I believe that one side of the gender spectrum causes a LOT more of the relationship issues in modern times. Especially when they have infinite amounts more freedom than us, usually with no scrutiny allowed
The reason gen x kids came out better is our boomer parents neglected the majority of us, and our grandparents made a huge impression for us. We are the remnant of the Golden generation, for having the best grandparents in over a hundred years or more.
I'm so glad I'm an old dude. Growing up at a time when people were sane and talked to each other. None of this social media garbage, never looked at tick toc or Instagram never will.
As a Senior PWP that has worked in mental health for 5 years, this girl is SPOT ON! Yes, we should talk about our mental health. Although, everyone will have ups and downs - that's life. It's about building resilience. Our waiting lists our enormous and I can't tell you the many young people refer themselves because they've had their first break up or their girlfriend/boyfriend is ignoring them. Meanwhile, I have another client who was a firefighter for 40 years dealing with complex PTSD who can't be seen yet because of the sheer amount of mild presentations coming through. It's the equivalent of going to A&E with small cut.
I absolutely adore all you have to say Freya:) Thank you for sending out some relevant msgs for young people. Well done. And thank you Chris for your insights and wonderful questions.... 'just right' kind throughout the episode. Well done you too..
They hit the nail on the head when they talked about how men have role models that help them better themselves, however women don't, because everyone is too afraid to talk to women in any way that could be perceived as "telling them what to do". I often see/hear women giving advice that tells a woman to treat their partners in the exact opposite way they should be treating them in order to have the relationship that they want and women wonder why their relationship is so awful.
Unfortunately, women are receiving and tending to listen to advice that makes them feel emotionally validated in the moment, rather than being confronted with a painful truth head on, stewing on it and then accepting the wisdom within.
Oh yes, I was so coddled when my mother spanked me over taking a few bandaids from the cupboard when I was 5, cause I was an accident prone kid and knew my mother wasn't going to come to my aid when I scraped my knee enough to drip blood.
Sounds like you’re taking a personal issue out of context and projecting it onto an entire demographic of people 👍🏻 you don’t actually know anything lol
🇭🇳 fan here! I love the subject of this video. I may have an unpopular opinion, but I believe many of these mental health issues are created in social media, but can be solved by bringing back people to reality and showing them real life problems or situations other people are facing. Not to undermine your issues, but to show you that your issues have solutions, or they are not as big as you think they are or simply that people pull through even in the middle of adversity. People nowadays need more perspective and real life experience, to not live so wrapped into themselves. Volunteering, specially in country like Honduras, can really ground you and make you realize what real life problems are.
In my 55 years of live, the one time I really noticed society & dating deteriorating almost over night, was the introduction of the cell phones, dating sites and then swiping date websites. It put way too much in the palm of peoples hands, especially women. Most do not know how to handle it. All the attention and false expectations.
I knew dating would die once cell phones were common. We used to meet up with friends, go home to messages, call people back and make plans for another day. Now the person you're with may get a call and want to leave. Or take calls from a fling easily. When people had land lines you couldn't tell a fling "I've been at work the past 3 months". Now guys are hiding in the toilet to make calls while with another woman but not want the other to notice their disappearance so they could get laid by multiple.
@@terrorists-are-among-us Oh no, you couldn't do that with Filipina women. My ex filipina sniper could hack all your calls and email. Don't ask me how. I can tell she still does this despite being apart for the past 10 years. I did not cheat but think she was bi-polar, gas lighting and driving me sleepless and over the edge, cops showing up at my door, unable to function, So had to cut it loose just to keep a job and survive.
Great expectations. People growing up today, believe that everyone else is having a terrific life, so they get depressed. Everyone's life sucks, it's always been like this, get used to it, and start enjoying what you are and what you have, instead of expecting a wonderful life to be just handed to you.
This. I was grumbling about some minor deprivation or other when my son was about 7 and he said to me, "Have what you have, mom " IOW be content. Be grateful.
As i grew up woman suddenly had all the good charakter traits, men got what has been left, the bad traits. Woman see themselves as the moral humans, therefore woman will not accept men giving them advice. The sisterhood created the echochamber to control the sisters, and all the sisters follow the bs without critical thinking. I have no idea how to get back to normal, but i think woman should take the iniciative to change.
It's so refreshing to see such a level-headed discussion of what's going on in society right now. No judging or ulterior motives; just two people telling it as it is. Don't be fooled into thinking this is just content for Gen Z / women. Everyone should see this to understand the problems that are affecting us all right now. Thank you for the insight. As a Gen X'er, I feel partially responsible for, and I apologize for, the creation of the internet. What was supposed to be a simple repository of information has morphed into a dangerous social media influence machine.
yeah, it's better. Only negative I see is that you're kind of alone in that decision. I feel like I'm the only one not on social media, my 60 year old mother is literally on Instagram and I can see her in real time change. (Ex: further from god, less traditional, more materialistic) She sees her friends and sisters on it and doesn't want to be left out.
Thank you for warning me not to go there, i never did in the past,it seems something was always telling me to stayaway from that and i did & i dont regret it.
just for some clarification that 128% increase in numbers for females can be misleading. in 2022 39,255 males did it and 10,194 females did it, and that is across all age groups. as per cdc website. also on website in the 10-24 age range 7,124 males and 6,529 females did it (an annual decrease of almost 9% for that age bracket with both sexes included, in the single year of 2022)
This immediately jumped out at me. Why is she comparing middle aged white men to teen girls? Sounds like cherry picking. I couldn’t find the data she is talking about. Also the elephant in the room, as you point out, is the HUGE difference in absolute numbers between males and females.
Met a 24 yr old at work who was more concerned about her following on instagram than about her job..always talking to different men on the phone before she texts her boyfriend that she loves him smh.felt sorry for the guy he said I love u back and he sounded genuine.Don’t get yourself in a hole like that.
God is dead and we have killed him. The issue isn't the symptom , but the reason, which is lack of meaning. Not only that meaning is lacking, but anti-meaning is prominent. Things like tiktok, youtube shorts, instagram etc. Suicide of a whole civilization, and since I am in my 20's , and in my opinion , it's my and my generation's responsibility/goal in life to not let that happen.
@@Laura-hg9bk Oh yes, 'monitor' your child as they descend into madness. My mother did that with me and video games. 'Monitored' me as I actively dropped out of 8th grade to play Starcraft. The kids need more than monitoring. They need abstinence from these things until they're 21, same as drinking.
My ex had a lot of anxiety problems .....she dealt with that anxiety by doom scrolling on tik tok which made her more anxious. Or she'd be anxious because she hadn't cleaned her room, so I told her pick one thing to put up at a time and she yelled at me and just sat there being anxious instead of doing something.
@ubiwrongcomeatme3452 your laziness is your fault, it's not an issue with games it's an issue within you as an individual. Most people can self regulate and just because you can't doesn't mean our freedoms should be infringed upon. Touch grass
Attention. That is all. You get attention as a female by saying you're suffering. People pay attention to you as a girl when you're in pain. Attention is female currency. Imagine if every time a young man said he was in pain, he would get offered sex to make him feel better. We'd be having a discussion about why so many young men are in constant pain.
Oh really? Huh, maybe nothing is wrong with me, that must be why my doctors never listen when I say I can't sleep due to nightmares and chronic pain... hmm, yep, women are always listened to when we say we're suffering. It's not like I'm told "just take some panadol" for my cramps, when I've already taken 4-6 ibuprofen. Or "Oh you're just anxious, come back in a month and we'll see if those SSRIs are working... oh, they make you nauseous, jittery and give you worse insomnia? Well, they must be working then!" "Oh you want your uterus removed, cause your periods are extremely painful and you don't want children? Well, what if your future husband wants kids? You need his permission,". "Oh you're anxious and depressed because your baby isn't latching and that's interfering with bonding? Well, you must be doing something wrong,". "You sure you haven't been fooling around with boys? We know how teenage girls get. You have got to be pregnant, there's no way it could be your appendix or ovary about to rapture,". Everywhere we turn, women's health is dismissed. Men can walk into the doctor's office, complain about a minor pain and walk out with a prescription, maybe after the second or third appointment at most. For many women, it takes years for us to be even believed that our period cramps aren't in fact normal. Let alone any other health condition. Look up the diagnosis rate of endometriosis compared to male infertility. Men don't get diagnosed with mental illnesses as often because they don't mention they struggles. That on them. We get diagnosed with anxiety without even a proper work up, just boom "anxiety, nothing else". We're called hysterical while whimpering in pain, while you are too proud to get off your fcking high horse about needing to bend someone's ear.
Of course not always… but I think you’re on target. I know a couple of older ladies who will engineer conflict and make up nasty shit, because they are lonely, and anything is better than being ignored
I wonder if/when it will ever occur to Gen Z girls to get off social media. Will they develop the discipline and wherewithal? Your guest is an incredibly articulate and effective communicator who hopefully will be able to help some of them.
The parents are to blame! Parents are supposed to guide children into the right direction because kids don’t have the self control and the connection to consequences that adults do. Don’t blame the teens and kids, blame the parents who know better.
I find it interesting that the pendulum is currently on blaming men for not stepping up, not taking care of themselves, not keeping their shit together and being ultra-competitive in the dating market, but I see it swinging in the other direction within the next 10 years.
@@ma3stro681 I don't think that's the answer for me. I chose to work on myself and I have many options now. There are good women out there but hard to find.
The posts about reasons not to have kids make me so sad. I had a miscarriage and one of my sons was stillborn at 9 months with no health problems (he got tangled in his umbilical cord and developed a clot). But I went through IVF to get pregnant again after trying the natural way for more than a year and I did it because being a mom is transcends all other forms of happiness. It is a happiness with true meaning that is basically indescribable. Is being a parent hard? Yes. But would I give it up to take trips to Bali and have regular boozy brunches? HELL NO!!! Motherhood and fatherhood is a gift from God on so many levels. If someone doesn't want kids, fine. But the pro and con list is made in ignorance. You can't understand the pros.
Although I'm a man who knew very early on that I don't want to have kids, I agree with you 100%. I've heard about the line of thinking "children are a burden" etc and I think it's actually vile. I mean most of those people probably shouldn't be parents anyway but trying to influence others that way is not right. I believe having a stable family is absolutely a blessing and having kids is a big part of that. What about all the couples who experience miscarriages or can't have children? I would also say that to "pro choice." They made their choice when conceiving (except rape) all they are choosing to do is end life. Anyway, I'm glad you shared your comment and sorry you had to go through that.
@@Engrave.Danger dunno how many people you've lost in your life but i carry them with me always, sometimes fondly sometimes not so. its okay to have those feelings and acknowledge them when they're there.
Just happened across this video. Actually, first time I've come across both of you. Both of you seem "reasonable and logical." Most definitely impressed with Ms India's calm, reasoned approach to the items addressed. The world could use more of young ladies like her. Good interviewer and interview Chris...
is it "as women" or "als women". ALS is a pretty terrible disease, right. But then... that makes no sense. Also the statement is pretty neutral. When there are women that care about men a lot, then you seem to care about women a lot, too. Sounds fair to me :)
28:05 I remember both of the times I found out I was going to be a father, like it was yesterday. The rush of emotions, the mixture of joy and anxiety. My boy riding his bike without training wheels for the first time. I still have pictures and of those times, but I think it's so important to experience the moment first and take a snap later.
Hello you savages. Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books here - chriswillx.com/books/ Here's the timestamps:
00:00 Is Gen-Z in a Mental Health Crisis?
05:13 The Dangers of Unnecessary Therapy
09:20 Gaps Between Social Media & Reality
16:50 How Public Should You Be on Social Media?
23:24 Capturing Memories Instead of Being Present
30:46 The Advice Young People Aren’t Receiving
34:41 Who Are Gen-Z Girls Looking Up to?
38:08 Is Society Coddling Women Too Much?
42:39 Bring Back Selfie Editing Shame
49:04 More & More Women Getting Cosmetic Surgery
52:48 Should Gym Girls Be Posting Their Stretch Marks?
59:14 How Gen-Z Girls Perceive Guys & Dating
1:06:39 Belief That Careers Provide More Meaning Than Family
1:15:54 Do We Actually Live in a Hookup Culture?
1:23:16 Impact of Broken Families on Gen-Z
1:31:26 Where Are the Mainstream Feminists Now?
1:33:07 What’s Next for Freya
1:35:06 Where to Find Freya
Chris - why aren't you calling her for her dishonest used of stats. Boys in the same age range have 44% higher suicide rate. Letting her call this a 'girl problem' is very dishonest of you. Boys in the same age range over the same age range had a 47% increase in suicide rate, not the 3% stat she selected.
I don't think TS is gonna have kids. She's too focused on her career, and she's almost pass that age to have kids.
the danger of unnecessary therapy is literally one of the topics, while you are also sponsored by betterhelp, a very contraversial therapy. Which is it chris? or are you just willing to take the money and turn the cheek?
can someone please clarify the name mentioned at 1:33:52 ? it got lost in translation for me (not a native english speaker)
We're not ur beauties anymore?
I didn’t allow my first son to have social media and now, at 20, he has no interest. I also don’t allow my 10 year old to have social media it is poison.
The world needs more of you
Yes. Our 2 sons (11 and 13) are the only ones without phones in their school.
Your watching this on social media? Hypocrite?
@@raczykThere’s a difference in allowing kids to use something and using it as an adult. It’s not hypocritical to drink a beer but not allow your son to drink one.
@@raczykTH-cam and instagram are two very different beasts. I wouldn’t consider TH-cam “social media.”
Social media has made people think they can get anyone and replace anyone.
i dont think that is true i think it has helped us see people we would not otherwise meet and empathize sadly it opened the door to toxicity and bullying
I think one of the most damaging things for females in todays society is telling them they should behave like males sexually. It actually hurts women to behave like men, and vice versa, when it comes to courtship and sex. This is the case regardless of one’s political affiliation. The sexes have different sexual systems, stemming from thousands of generations of evolutionary influence. Drawing upon biological or evolutionary explanations for behavior and abiding by traditional gender roles might actually help us when it comes to romantic relationships. The modern-day feminist movement maintains that a well-functioning society should do away with gendered norms. In theory, this would be a good thing; a person should be free to live as they please without being held to expectations based on an immutable characteristic like sex. But then this line of thinking goes too far-if the sexes are truly equal, it reasons, there should be no differences between men and women, including in the realms of dating and sex.
Any deviation from this symmetry, or any adherence to gender-typical roles, is seen as chauvinistic or “toxic” of men and belittling of women. The admirable goal of gender equality has metastasized into meaning that men and women are the same, and therefore, any sex differences differences are socially imposed and can be unlearned, or altogether don’t exist. As a result, it’s become fashionable to call into question biology and evolutionary psychology, which is a shame because they offer a truly enlightening perspective into the way we think. Both have become verboten in recent years, tarnished with allegations of sexism, irrelevance, and being in opposition to women’s rights. In actuality, nothing could be further from the truth.
One of the greatest myths perpetuated about female sexuality is that women enjoy casual sex as much as men. Young women are encouraged to pursue hooking up because that is what empowered women are supposed to. Those who abstain are seen as unfortunate casualties of a culture rampant with slut shaming and repressive gender norms. Considering everything we know about evolutionary psychology, this doesn’t make much sense. Despite feminism’s incessant prodding that women indulge in no-strings-attached sex, men consistently report greater enjoyment of it, while women experience more negative reactions. After having casual sex, women are more likely to self-report depression, regret, and feeling “used.” Men, conversely, self-report feeling like they had used their female partners. Is there any truth to the idea that social standards influence this behavior?
When we look at sociosexuality (which refers to a person’s enjoyment of sex without commitment), in more egalitarian societies, like Norway and Denmark, women enjoyed casual sex more, but so did men, leading to larger sex differences This is not to say that women should cease having casual sex. Women should be free to have as many libidinous encounters with as many different partners as they’d like, if that’s what they choose to do. I’m a strong believer that what’s good for the goose is good for the gander; if promiscuity is socially acceptable for men, then it should be socially acceptable for women, too, and conversely, if it is frowned upon for one sex, it should be frowned upon for both sexes. There definitely still exists a double standard regarding women’s sexuality-for example, that men are free to roam sexually while women must remain chaste to preserve their inherent value as future wives and human beings, more broadly-and even though these attitudes are rooted in evolutionary psychology, that isn’t an excuse to hold women to a different standard than men.
A person cannot make good decisions without having all of the information available to them. Currently, only one message is being aimed at women in the mainstream, and unless a young woman has parents, educators, or health professionals in her life-who have not embraced this particular ideology around casual sex-whom she feels she can turn to to talk about these very intimate and in some cases, potentially embarrassing, topics, the only place she will be able to access information will be on the Internet and through exposure to messages in the media. There are, of course, many women who do enjoy casual sex, and many men who don’t, and so long as everything is consensual, it’s no one’s place to judge.
My concern is that only one perspective is being promoted as acceptable for young women, once again dictating to women that they should behave like men in order to be well adjusted, yet paradoxically, young men are being made to feel shameful if they behave like men. If a woman is more interested in having committed relationships, that should be completely fine, too. She should not be made to feel as though she is uptight, unenlightened, or a sexual prude.
The narrative that sexism and socialization are the most powerful influences on women’s sexual behavior-or lack thereof-leads women astray in several ways. First of all, male sexuality is concordant. This means when a man is turned on psychologically, he’s also turned on physically, down below. Female sexuality, on the other hand, is much more context-dependent, and is lower in sexual concordance. Women may be psychologically turned on, but not physically, and vice versa. It can take a bit of extra time for a woman to get warmed up.
From an evolutionary perspective, this ties into women’s greater selectivity when choosing their mates. For instance, a woman’s brain processes sexual cues differently, depending on where she is in her ovulatory cycle. A recent study using functional MRI demonstrated that women possess increased efficiency in inhibitory brain function when they are potentially fertile. This is adaptive because it allows a woman to be more cautious when evaluating a potential partner at times when it is more likely that she will become pregnant. It’s not appropriate or helpful to use male sexuality as the standard, because women’s bodies don’t operate this way. Women who believe female and male sexuality are no different will feel pressured to perform similarly to their male partners in the bedroom. When they don’t or can’t, they will internalize this, thinking there is something wrong with them.
It may be the twenty-first century, but a man should still be required to make the first move. Initiating contact contact or romantic interest is a small act demonstrating he is willing to invest in her. As a woman, you do not want your boyfriend to treat you like one of the guys, even if that sounds commendable in the name of gender equality, because doing so requires him to put in much less effort. You want to know that if and when the day comes that you’re heavily pregnant and immobile on the couch, he will bring you what you need to ease your discomfort, instead of muttering that you should get it yourself. Even if you have no plans to have children, you want to ensure that your partner will prioritize you.
We have not yet severed our modern-day sexual behavior from its history. It’s a system that has served us quite well, considering that we exist today. Acknowledging as much doesn’t mean women will get the short end of the stick, nor does it require perpetuating the cliché that women should be sexually submissive and men should be sexual aggressors. If anything, this knowledge can be used to the advantage of both sexes. Women have been told to take charge in their romantic lives as a sign of independence, confidence, and female strength. While I don’t think women should be sitting around, waiting for a guy to send a text, there is something to be said for letting him come to you. You want to give signals that you are interested, but not too interested-sexually appealing, but not too forward. Finding the right words to start a conversation can be hard, especially if it’s with a stranger. Requiring men to, at minimum, initiate interest will help to weed out those who are just going to waste your time. It also means that he values you. A man who isn’t required to invest will almost by default be interested.
Beyond that, I’d advise women to not play hard to get. If you are interested in someone and they ask you out, say yes. As for men, don’t apologize for being masculine. Pull your weight in a relationship and be gentlemen. Some women may find holding doors open and gestures of the like unnecessary, but they shouldn’t be offended. Truly successful relationships require a healthy and accurate understanding of not only one another, but human behavior; otherwise you will end up with a partner who is only telling you what you want to hear.
Rogan quote: "Instagram is an infidelity accelerating MACHINE."
@@silverkitty2503 stop drinking the kool aid my friend
Sam Vakn said social media are made in narcissistic way, and in isolatring way.....he says its anti-social media, because the creators also are antisocial, and creators are all men he said none of the creators or owners is a woman... but nerd anti-social men.
Also Tristan Harris said the social media is made by design, also the behavior is expected, because they hired thousands of attention engineers to make it certain way.
It's really creepy that the only advice men are ever getting is self-improvement and the only advice women are ever getting is self-acceptance. We should strive to give everyone a more balanced outlook.
Jesus Christ already did but most people like their own fused idealistic religion
@@AniMeLoVeR23451 true, we need to self reflect (a good thing church tends to encourage, self reflecting and pondering morality), and also consider the needs of others (first two greatest commandments, golden rule)
Completely agree. Both genders need both self acceptance and self improvement. I am constantly defending Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan to other women. They've helped me a lot, particularly Peterson. And it makes me sad that so many people lump them in with Tate, who is sex trafficker and terrible person. A lot of people don't seem to like self-reflection.
Yup! Most of these kids can't sit with feeling negative emotions. I think we're going to have a generation of very emotionally fragile people.
maybe on some of these topic if not many. there are that much difference between men and women.
I mean yes man and women are different sexes, sex is real, but we might be the same species and not one is bear and one a fish. so maybe.
I struggle for some time, and sometimes still do, to express this to young people. Workwise i come in contact with a lot of people between 15-25.
And the balance between your are okay as you are love yourself and you are not okay as you are improve yourself is difficult.
Cause these are somewhat exclusive. If everything is okay why would you improve and if there is something to improve you arent perfect maybe not even good. And it doenst have to be self hatred but at least some selfdisappointment
Most people need mentors not therapists.
It does reinforce the 'sick person' position, doesn't it ?
married parents. specifically fathers present in the home.
No they need fathers, except women voted for a system that makes it easy to kick them out of the home and fleece them for cash and prizes
@@dolanduk7946 well sure but once you're an adult in a position to get your own therapist, you've probably missed the window on a father. Lol
@@DavidSmith-mt7tb ....more than likely because mommy divorced him, kicked him out of the house, took his money, and alienated him from his kids
The problem is social media and we all know it.
Thanks for pointing out the problem but can you provide a solution? Social media is here to stay, it's unreasonable to simply say "social media = bad" Sure, we can use it less often but you're living in a fantasy world if you think that'll fix all our problems.
While things did get worse after smart phones, much worse, the problems were already there. But men arent allowed to talk about it, even if they have a daughter. So women will have to sort this one out all on their own.
@@worndown8280 Men aren't allowed to talk about what? Not even sure what this comment means
Putting aside the monetary value of holding attention, in whatever way possible - often in a cynical way: Doesn't social media simply amplify and present us with existing competition behaviors between women?
Yup social media and phones!
This isn't just a gen z issue. My ex partner is in her 40s and exhibits exactly the same behaviours you are describing.
I agree unfortunately this cancer has affected a lot of age groups and will soon if not have already affect other more traditional groups and religions I’m from turkey and it have made it already to my borders and has infected women with the same shit the western countries are going through so I when men are getting their passports I always say your leaving to find the same shit you are running away from
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains how easy is to brainwash human brain especialy in childhood, or at young age,
because subconscious mind is created in childhood.
Because when you watch a tv or screen of computer, and see things moving on the screen, the brain freezes for a while,
it creates a state of alpha in brain a hypnotic state of brain,
it opens the door from conscious mind into subconscous mind,
and person becomes more suggestible to information.
It´s like installing program into Ipad or computer a good valuable progarm or bad program.
Human brain works as computer.
What happens is the girl wants to be a good person, has good values of the conscious mind,
but she is not realising that in her subconscious mind are installed all the negative beliefs, or programs.
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains that until you reprogram the subconscious mind púrograms, you can not fulfill your conscious mind values and you positive wishes and desires.
But of course if you practice meditation or metacognition, you are more self-aware, but most people don´t know the meditation or metacognition techniques.
or they don´t realize that their brain is hacked by the media
But he teaches people techniques how to reprogram the subconscious mind in positive way, or changing habits, thoughts, and beliefs etc.
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains how easy is to brainwash human brain, especialy in childhood, or at young age,
because the subconscious mind is created in childhood.
Because when you watch a tv or screen of computer, and see things moving on the screen, the brain freezes for a while,
it creates a state of alpha in brain a hypnotic state of brain,
it opens the door from conscious mind into subconscous mind,
and person becomes more suggestible to information.
It´s like installing program into Ipad or computer a good valuable progarm or bad program.
Human brain works as computer.
What happens is the girl wants to be a good person, has good values of the conscious mind,
but she is not realising that in her subconscious mind are installed all the negative beliefs, or programs.
Dr. Bruce Lipton explains that until you reprogram the subconscious mind púrograms, you can not fulfill your conscious mind values and you positive wishes and desires.
But of course if you practice meditation or metacognition, you are more self-aware, but most people don´t know the meditation or metacognition techniques.
or they don´t realize that their brain is hacked by the media
But he teaches people techniques how to reprogram the subconscious mind in positive way, or changing habits, thoughts, and beliefs etc.
@@MS-nm2kt I was looking at moving to asia for this reason, but I can see that the same behaviours are already showing up there too. It's affecting anyone with a smartphone.
Older women are worse. They think used cars go up in value.
Female role models: “live your life however you want!”
Male role models: “there are rules and boundaries to living a good life”
That very much depends on whom you consider a male role model. There are some pretty big names in the manosphere that completely lack any integrity or virtue and a lot of young men copy and paste their values (or lack thereof) onto their own lives, which is sad.
But I agree there are too few good female ones.
Those manosphere dudes are easy to weed out. They show their true colours fast. @@tempsoda
@@Sisterlisk you'd think so, but judging by the amount of followers they have between them, I'm not convinced. I mean it's not hard to see why, when you're an angsty 18 year old guy, that's facing rejection or failure and you see a 'successful' older guy offering you cheat codes to get everything you deem valuable, if you only join his online program...🙄 Hook, line, sinker.
@@skyrailmaxima that might be more plausible if they weren't the exact same values and integrity that they demand from women.
That is just garbage.
Mental anguish is a barometer for personal development. Telling women they dont need to work on themselves is a recipe for a confusing, painful life.
Yeah after they find themselves on the wrong side of 30 and they don't have legions of white knights stepping in to save them from all their fatherless decisions
Superdisco - well said! But it's worse than that... By pandering and soothing to youngster's needs (and making money off of it), it's preventing growing up, meeting and over coming adversity, stopping independence because it's creating ever lasting dependency... Social Media - truly an opioid drug for the masses...
@@dolanduk7946That too like when a girl out earns you by a significant degree has a timer silently ticking down.
This💯💯
All women are perfect 10s.
It's heresy to imply gods need to work on themselves.
It’s sad people aren’t learning how to socialize irl. Trying to befriend anyone in-person is incredibly hard now. They start to think you’re creepy for asking get-to-know-ya questions. Then of course they’ll reflexively share their socials with you, which ironically reveals too much personal information.
I'm not sure if all of this is social media influence. I find it invasive when upon first meeting someone basically interviews me about my background. Let's just exchange names and talk about a shared interesting subject first. I don't think that type of questioning has ever been comfortable to people. But maybe it's a bit different where you are, I come from a pretty private culture. And yeah I share basically nothing whatsoever on my socials, less than you would find out by just looking at me irl.
@@Noelciaaaagreed, part of the getting to know people irl thing is remembering that personal info is a resource you should save only for those who have earned your trust. Over sharing personal info, ironically, is a very online thing since most people feel a okay revealing personal shit to strangers who they may or may not ever see again.
In real life, you go slow because they stakes are higher. You could reveal something embarrassing to a person with loose lips, or secretly dislikes you, or is of bad moral character who wants to manipulate you. You never know what to expect, and for that reason you will want to withhold too much until you are certain as to what you have.
It's safer to tell a random stranger about something personal than to post it online.
@@castirondude yeah well i don't do either
It’s sad gen z people don’t even seem to believe millennials that socialising 15 years ago really was awesome, and it really is gone. People had a way higher base level of confidence and flair. It was a completely different experience of life. It started to fall away as censorship and identity movements took over, which most of my generation got sucked into, and gen z people don’t seem to be aware there was a much nicer world before when people weren’t always looking for a way to catch you out for perceived moral transgressions and people could fight and make friends again afterwards. I mean we used to have parties where stuff really happened that people would be talking about for years, in a good way, and if we mention then to gen z people then they are all freaked out. It’s so sad. It’s a huge cultural retreat.
The social media revolution and it’s consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
Fucken aye Uncle Ked
100% agreed
*as he uses social media 😂
@@allenwarfield * as you prove his point
Invest in cats and cat accessories, in 5 to 10 years these vapid social media obsessed garden tools are going to turn into bitter spinsters
I had a girlfriend who turned out to be a covert narcissist. She engaged with an online therapist who was analysing me dependant on what my girlfriend was saying.
Needless to say it made our relationship worse. I eventually left.
Stay away from these cranks
Good luck boss 👍
Was she diagnosed by the same therapist?
Used to be common knowledge to not date someone in therapy. Wait until they’re healthy enough to stand on their own two feet. The problem is people with no serious problems going to therapy and the therapist needs to find a problem to talk about.
@@KatKhatibi It should not be an issue if the therapist is competent. It isn't the therapists job to validate or have opinions about people in their patients' lives. In fact the therapist's job is to challenge the person's thinking.
ZZZZzzzz. Crazy is as crazy does...try meditation and recognize the vaccine and online use effect your hippocampus....unplug from the Matrix.
Abandoning social media about two years ago was one of the best decisions I have ever made.
@@randalldraco3822 he is back and his life falls apart as i type this comment, rip 😥
Everyone has got to do this. It’s a breath of fresh air.
Very cool!
TH-cam is social media as well.
Isn't TH-cam social media?
The problem is that society is so polarized. There’s no balance in anything and has to be black and white, the world without grey area is a terrible world to be in
What kind of american are ya?
Very true
Depends on context because some grey areas can be a slippery slope
So what’s the gray area on murder, pedophilia, rape, theft, drunk driving, etc?
@@seminolekilla did I say that everything needed a grey area or did I say that the world as a whole lacks grey area? Instead of looking for an argument digest what I said. Also there’s already grey areas on murder, you have to decide if it’s self defense on not which inserts grey area. What if the person is trespassing on your property and threatening you? You’re allowed to killed them if you have a lawful firearm, so there’s your grey area. For rape there’s a grey area, it’s hard to consider consent if both parties are drunk and they’ve been having sex but this time the woman wasn’t totally down to do it. It’s up to a judge or jury to decide if there’s enough to consider it rape or not.
As a college professor, I see it firsthand. The whole political, social media and dating practice are destroying relationships and confidence in younger generations. It is both genders - not just women. Big business and influencers need to be identified and rejected.
people need to learn how to think critically and think for themselves, not just blindly follow
i worked at university as well, and i am astounded how many people come in with good grades in school, getting into med school and doing well but cant get any confidence out of it. Dont know how do manage any relationships properliy, friends, roommates, dates, partner and professional ones.
maybe because i came from lower income household i felt like i was boss when i got accepted into med school. i mean so was everybody else, but i never saw it as a competition because once i was in, and if ai graduate i am a physican nobody can take that from me.
the term influencer, to me as a 41 year old man in the UK, makes a little bit of sick appear in my throat, imagine wanting to be influenced I mean, people cant even create their own opinion these days its ridiculous.
@@phutureproofkind of sums up the recent rise and fall of leftism. Strap in it gonna be a bumpy ride 🤙
This is important. Also, people stopped talking before class starts.
People used to require the teacher/professor to get us to settle down.
Phones are slowly killing us. Been preaching this for at least four years. I’ve finally got my usage in check and boy it’s like my eyes have been opened again.
My granddaughter is 16. I've noticed that these kids don't actually TALK to each other. The kids get off the bus together but they're all on their phones texting someone somewhere else!? 😢
I take away all my kids devices the two hours immediately after school when they get home. From 3-6pm they may only eat, read, sleep, exercise outside or take a nap.
Kathy in Europe it's increasingly more common to forbid phones at schools. This forces the kids to talk to each other again in the real world.
@@TokyoTaisu that's a great idea. I don't believe they can have their phones turned on at school either. Luckily she loves to come over and visit us often, even though I make her leave her phone off while she's here.💗
A close family member, a 15 years old girl, all I get in response in text messages is: yes, no, aha, nice, I don’t know. Period.
I think this is a good thing. All of us are eventually going to live in virtual worlds because the virtual worlds will be more miraculous than anything in our real one. Now is the time to train our kids to become one with their devices..... sort of like an adjustment period.
Capturing memories with a phone is a sort of Faustian bargain: you can have the memory forever if you forgo experiencing the moment.
Daaaaamn
what about cameras
@@JK-cz1km phones are cameras
🎯
You can easily do both.
As a clinician in the field, the problem pervades the (mostly female) therapists around me. They themselves post about their mental health challenges, then foster group sessions that basically glorify the disorders, and make a community that is impossible to leave. It seems like the clients don't know that it is ok to make progress. They stay because they make friends there, then sometimes even get secondary trauma from those around them. I do everything I can to operate on an "up-and-out" model. I want to elevate, teach some skills, then send them on their way. If they come back, we'll troubleshoot, but the goal is for life to continue for them with some improvement. I don't want to see their faces again. My field is saturated with spinelessness and too many positive feedback loops.
Doing the lords work there friend.
I remembered this one time a cardinal landed right in front of my car and my phone camera took so long to open that by the time that it did the bird had flown away. Made me think of the the phrase, you missed the moment by trying to make it last forever.
It’s like the people who go to a concert just to record it on their phone. Life is happening right in front of them, but the constant need to have an excuse to fiddle with the phones is making them miss… all for a small grainy video with poor audio that no one is ever going to watch.
Urgh I hate it when it rains clergymen.
@@Soxfandan yes! Every time when I want to take my phone and start recording a piece of a concert, I make a mental note for myself that the whole show will be accessible online in a much better quality, so there is no need to record. Same with sightseeings - there are million beautiful shots of Eiffel Tower, the Pyramids, Asakusa temple etc. available, I don’t need to go through the crowds of tourists to take my own personal one.
I first thought it was the Church Cardinal 😂😂😂
Imagine letting social media dictate how you live your real life.
Well, it's not really hard to imagine. We've all been influenced by "social media" even throughout history especially through newspapers and radio. But now it's more wide-reaching, frequent, exaggerated and intense, so of course we're not responding well to it. We're just trying to fulfill our basic human needs for community, security, amongst other things. This is across all demographics. So no, not hard to imagine at all.
It is not that weird to think, they are present in our life to big extend.
Easy to say this when you don't have the looks or personality required to gain a big following and make great money off it
Social media is dictating women to live 4B lifestyle, even though that movement is for Korea
Imagine looking down on young girls for being easily influenceable…
In the 80s 90s, and prior, you asked a girl for her number, and if she like you and gave it to you, she'd be thinking of 'you', and you only!
Today, this has gone out the window, because of choices due to social media.
Therefore men...."Learn to seek your happiness by limiting your desires, rather than in attempting to satisfy them."
And with men and boys the same problem occurs, only more due to internet porn. I bet it also affects women and their apparent "hypergamy" also. Internet porn has been said to be moving us towards Polygamy and polygamous societies are said to be unstable ones, with more insecurity and violence.
The don't have many options. It is even worst than that. All of them are entitled and think that they deserve the top 10% of men. Average women don't want average men.
When Jordan Peterson referred to that study on Tender- he was referring to one data point. There are other studies that show 90% of all people online do not find a relationship. Which means online dating is not working out for most people (both women and men). And yet another study that shows womens desirability decreases after 18 years old, which would indicate men are also engaging in hypergamy online.
This victim mindset is ridiculous… talk girls your age in real life… that’s the solution.
@@panos7256it’s going to result in a world wide set back, the fall of western society is inevitable
@@susieq2873 Only old women advocate for men to talk women their age.
The last few years i have realized.. people just do whatever they are told and believe whatever they are told to believe. Free thinking is a rarity that is only getting more rare.
Now i don't know whether i should believe you or not🤔
dont think there is such a thing as a free thinker, unless you lived by yourself in the mountains from day 1
You're not wrong. I'm not talking about a specific political party here, but you can pretty easily figure out if someone is an actual person or if they're a drone by asking about their political stances. There's a massive demographic of both democrats and republicans that hold every single political stance as their political party, because everyone around them thinks the exact same way and they don't question anything. If someone is pro choice, pro trans kids, pro social programs, anti-Catholic, they live in a democratic area. If they're anti-the aforementioned stances, they live in a republican area.
A lot of people, who are more like drones than actual people, don't even question any of these stances they have. It is actually crazy how few people can think for themselves. Hardly anyone is a moderate anymore that has their own opinions.
People want to do what’s popular more than what is right.
I don't know shit for certain. Except what I know for certain. And even then, I'm not really certain. Is reality real? Are you alive? What is alive? Is this 'free' thinking? Is this the 'free thinking' you're talking about? Is anyone truly free, thinking or otherwise? I'm more enraptured with the questions than the answers at this point.
I'll just do what I will with what I think is true for now. Until I know differently. Then I'll do what I will with that. The evolving nature of experience and consciousness is absolutely horrifying, sometimes. But, I'd rather face my fears than shrink from them, for whatever that's worth.
For the record, everyone should forgive everyone else, and then protecc themselves and their loved ones as much as they can from what they know are bad experiences.
The issue is the intentional division of men and women.
Since when has there ever been a unity between men and women....? The division exists precisely because men and women are not the same and are competing in the market.
What's wrong with intentional division?
@@Hooga89it was better before the tax collector and lawyer found out how profitable the division could be
@@Hooga89 You accidentally said it. Men and women didnt use to compete with each other. They use to compliment each other. But you are very right, in modernity, men and women do compete.
@@worndown8280 Men and women have always competed with each other, women were just discourged harder from competing prior to the 1960s, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. And no, women and men have never "complimented" each other either, that's just another fiction.
As a member of Gen Z I couldn't be more happy that this is being talked about. The point she brings up about therapy culture is really important too. The texting service for therapy is horrible because you don't have the opportunity to develop a therapeutic relationship. Without that it's simply someone justifying your actions or affirming you constantly. Which isn't productive for anyone.
"Everything you say or do can and will be used against you"- THE INTERNET
Yea, I feel bad for the kids growing up with the internet everywhere. No where for them to go where they don't have to worry about screwing up. Their anxiety has got to be off the charts.
It used to be just school, but nowadays kids can't screw up around their friends either, photos, screenshots and social media last forever.
Sounds more like a woman than the internet
Women down bad- Society needs to change
Men down bad- Get good scrub
What in the world is that?
not taking responsibility ensures you'll remain in the same spot
women tend to blame everyone but themselves, but so do a lot of the boys trained by w l f d worldviews
These days it's the red pill incel culture saying society needs to change
and that is harder on women then on men.
@@benchristenson2280 I don't get all this false doom and gloom situations given by the red pill towards women. A way greater percentage of women must have healthy social lives with good people compared to men. Average looking women in their 40's still have lots of options on dating apps if they have a nice personality if they were willing to get to know dudes further away from them etc... Red pill is more about coping than it is telling the 100% truth these days honestly
Young men have been committing suicide and generally dealing with depression for years, no one seemed to care.
Some girls start to have a worse time and it’s the worst thing in the world.
Not so after equality of outcome now, are we? Funny that.
Yeah, I don't feel bad for them when their side of the coin frequently misrepresents the actual data to make it look like they have it worse when often they don't. Yeah, I have a doomer wojak pfp the detractors can fucking cry about it.
It's called social media women are constantly comparing themselves to one another plus they are hooking up with guys who genuinely don't care...simple 🤙🏾
When they push all the good men away by generalizing them all as bad, they shouldn't be so shocked when it's only bad men left around them because those men ignored what they were saying.
@@SpecterVonBaren They are only getting what they wanted, and they still complain. And the rest of us men can't seem to escape their whining even though we aren't with them. 😔🤷♂
@@CrusaderZealotI agree.
Personally I'm sick of their problems.
It's about getting a photo nothing more. Everywhere you go people are taking photos. I remember when it started and I would make ugly face for the photo and people would get mad. Good 😂
I agree.
Social media and its consequences have been a disaster for humanity.
100% it’s social media. I’ve noticed that so many women can’t go anywhere without posting to social media.
I’ve gone out to eat with women and as soon as all of our food arrived I started eating. Meanwhile they started taking pictures. As if the food was more important to their followers than them.
They found it amusing that I was the only one eating and not taking pictures. Meanwhile I found it odd that they were taking pictures and not eating.
That's called food porn lol
You’re not special ❤ having food is a privilege and wanting to commemorate the moment that you spend eating good food prepared by a chef in a beautiful place with hopefully a beautiful partner (M or F) should be a moment to celebrate and remember. If you don’t like photos in general, sure. But truly what’s wrong with wanting to capture life’s most beautiful moments? We all struggle in life someway or another, there’s better reasons to put someone down for than this
@@Lizaskz you don't need to take pictures and film something to enjoy it. How many times have you gone through you phone gallery and looked out on old photos? Also if everything is "special" and need to be celebrated, nothing really is.
In actuality it's people's way of dealing with social media. I use it every day, don't post anything (And never have), don't get into that comparison bubble and just read up on news. You are good as long as you realize that most is fake and what's not fake just happens and that you can't do anything about it. Dealing with social media is like dealing with reality since it's been pushed into our daily life. To understand social media is to understand how humans function. If you aren't capable of that, don't use it. On a large scale, as most aren't, I overall have to agree with you though.
Taking pictures of food is not the problem itself, more the taking pictures for validation is the problem.
To sum this episode up: women hurt women and girls hurt girls. They're their own worst enemy.
'women beware women', as old Ben Thingummy had it.
ok incel
@@pm8401 Ok, femcel.
Men and boys hurt women and girls too for being in their natural looks and not fake character.
Huh
As a father of two young daughters this seems like one of the most important topics to know and do something about. Very impressed by this conversation. Thank you both.
Daughters are on phones, and mums are on phones. You just have to have that online recognition to justify your existence. Get real, stop looking inwardly at your phone, and start looking outwardly at the world.
Dude if you look around EVERYONE is on their phones regardless of gender.....even my 65 year old dad who complains about 'young people being on their phones all the time' is on his phone a lot.
Maybe if fathers were more involved their daughters lives it wouldn't be like this.... oh wait the moms voted for a system that makes it easy to kick dad out and fleece him for cash and prizes
Its over
technology is addictive, and you cant really life without it. @@mrbritisher9748
Freya really is a perfect medium to communicate these topics, to the young girls of the west.
Because she doesn’t come across amped/hyper passionate, like so many young contributors do today, it’s calming just hearing her speak and seeing her demeanour, which I would assume for young girls is vastly needed.
I went on a 2 weeks road trip with my Harley, I documented it in my journal and took pictures on my Polaroid camera and attached them with a paper clip. The pictures are average quality but they can’t be edited or taken again, because of the gloss they can’t be scanned or even retaken on my iPhone. The colour are washed out and they are a bit bland but they represent a moment in time.
Awesome idea. There's something special about those old Polaroids. Lo-Fi movement loves them. I have my granddad's Land Camera, but the film is very expensive at $20 USD for just 8 exposures. Might take my old Pentax KM with me out to the northwest this summer. B&W 35mm film is still cheap and the landscape is pretty much made for it.
They are strong and independent, they will be fine, don't worry.
Agree! They bought into all the bs and here they are now whining.
27 no's and 1 yesch is still a yesch
@@deangelisdatapls seek help...
@@InvestAndGrow2020oh yeah bro because getting on your moral high horse about this stuff due to being 'vindicated' doesn't do anything good for society, not that you want a good society you just want to feed your ego that you are 'right'.
Load up on them cat food stocks lol
We all thought fashion and magazines were the devil before social media came out, I’m not surprised the negative impact it’s had on women and girls. The young lads I talk to in my climbing gym are equally as affected now. They are shaving their arms and bodies and are so worried about what people think of them. Pushing the ‘female’ narrative on the world is doing no one any favours. Man up lads, stay strong and hairy it’s what everyone needs!!
Young men are beyond obsessed with their image. In some instances, young men seem to obsess over their image more than young women. Young men are attracting the attention of older, gay men, and they don't understand why.
Yes all the media: magazines, tv, etc are trash
I hate being hairy 😂 it's to friggin hot.
Shaving their arms?!
@@JoeNeutrino yes mate, I couldn’t believe it. Lads are ashamed of growing hair. The polar opposite of when I was at school.
bro nobody is doing ok
Facts
I am
Just have to experience groundhog day.
@@ericcantu3027 what do you mean?
Im a Gen Z girl, 2001. I didn't get a phone until I was 16/17 and dont have tiktoc, insta ect. I had a father in the military for 20 years since 2001, and it was constant moving and always adapting to uncomfortable situations. He retired in 21 and im thankful that nothing too terrible happened when he went on deployments in Afghanistan.
I'm thankful I have wonderful parents. They have been happily married since 2000 and they were high school sweethearts. My parents both came from large families that didn't care about them and didn't care what they would do after high school. My Parents wanted to raise their kids differently from how they grew up and taught me to not be a victim and to just better yourself and toughen up. It's scary how my generation is so weak, I want to find a husband who reminds me of my dad in values/morals. I think I might have met someone like that :) .
Cherish him and make sure he cherishes you like the gem you sound to be!
Well best of luck to you
Best of luck. As an older man I tell you: respect him and everything might go well. Search for bigger fish or wallet and become a cat lady.
Lucky girl! Congrats to you and your dad.
That's awesome. I'm happy for you.
And this “pressure” comes from other women.
and the pressure from other women comes from corporations and gov't
@@Xopher30 so you are saying women are incapable of agency? Nice. Women are either personally responsible or they are not.
Exactly the wrong women are influencing other women, nowadays.
@@worndown8280Fascinating black and white thinking, there.
@@jimluebke3869 nah just the truth. We let men and women off the hook all the time for personal choices. Thats what life is, a series of choices. Currently we hold few personally responsible.
Maybe you are ok with that. I am not.
I like her, my goodness, a young lady that actually THINKS rather than FEELS everything. So refreshing.
“There’s something nostalgic about only having a memory of things”
I mostly agree with everything you guys are saying. Especially the social media aspect. Though as someone who was raised in the 90s and has almost no videos or photos of the first 20ish years of my life, I’m making an effort to take more videos.
Thanks for this thoughtful dialogue about important stuff
Girls made these same arguments in the 1980's, complaining of being influenced into making bad decisions outside of their control, no personal accountability.
And they had a point then, too.
Madonna was not a good role model.
I have to say that Orwell noted as well as Frank Herbert in God Emperor of Dune that women are the sex with a bit more zealotry and fervor for ideologies. So if society tells you as a woman to act a certain way, to keep things peaceful, cohesive, and to stay in the loop with other group members, women will do what society and other women tell them to do and sometimes with extreme ideological fervor. This lines up with biology and anthropology because of how women need groups to help raise children and that’s how women socialize with each other. It’s actually quite rare to meet women who are willing to rebel against society.
So as much you may think it’s an issue of accountability, which in some aspects it is… but if culture only tells you one thing and your parents are assholes so you don’t care about listening to them, have you actually had anyone tell you properly how to act? Has anyone even modeled it properly for you?
My mom told me I should dress like Madonna and Selena with the bustiers and jean jackets at 14. I thought she was crazy. She said I was boring. There isn’t proper modeling of appropriate behavior at home, in society, in culture, in media.
If you’re inundated with a message, no matter how rooted you are, you will question yourself if you are going against the inundation. The gaslighting is unreal. From family, “friends”, society, media. It’s hard to sift through all the information. And even harder if you were left to raise yourself.
TH-cam you are the absolute devil for deleting comments. I’m literally defending women because of the gaslighting they get from family, friends, society, and media and you delete my comment. TH-cam hates ppl.
TH-cam deleting my comment after defending women for the gaslighting they get from family, friends, society and media is just chef’s kiss.
TH-cam deletes comments defending women.
Pill popping should be avoided unless absolutely needed
Its a destructive hole to go down and does not address the route problem and merely creates an additional highly addictive problem
I'm 30, met a 24 year old girl who was amazing, intelligent, funny, smart and witty, had great taste in music art and clothing, really really pretty. I honestly fell in love with her but it didnt work out, i had to leave the country for work and she wasnt ready for a serious relationship. Anyway, her biggest problem was her lack of resilience and fortitude. She couldnt handle negative emotions - she was convinced she had a mental disorder and her doctor had agreed she was bipolar or had an emotional issue. Maybe she did, but i remember helping her through some hard days and her opening up and telling me she had never thought about handling stress the way i was advising her to - she had always just assumed anxiety = something is wrong with me. I hope shes doing well.
Probably isn't, but it's not your problem anymore.
You dodged a bullet bro
Guy, you absolutely not get with someone that doesn't have themselves together. Most of the time, you'll be the one that has to deal with their issues instead of themselves and you'll become their therapist instead of a partner. It isn't fair to you to deal with someone else's problems that they aren't confident enough to try and handle themselves
@@electroeel148did you not watch this video? Almost no young people (myself included) have their lives together
You dodged a bullet. My ex was a narcissist and bipolar. She had a Jekyll and Hyde personality.
You mean toxic feminism doesn’t bring happiness. I’m shocked I mean literally nobody saw that coming.
The whole idea of snow white not needing the prince, ok she doesn't need to rely on him but it's a hard cold miserable existence to be alone. She needs nobody will lead to a sad lonely life but that's the goal the image now. Women don't need men !!! Everybody who's emotionally healthy needs other ppl because we are social animals. We need love trust and connection. The idea we need no one is the psychopaths dream
@@matthewguzda4075 Pretty much. I don’t really see the point without someone to come home to.
In my experience everything is better with a significant other.
I think a lot of people don’t understand what it takes to be in a relationship. Compromise, commitment, respect, the smallest amount effort all seem to be a bridge to far for many.
The payout from the effort is priceless.
@@mi5jason I'll tell you something man, when ppl are on their death bed and want to tell others there what they are thinking it's often " I love you" . Which to me is obvious yet still ppl feel the need to say that and the reason is is because it matters. We need to express how we feel. There needs to be an ear to the lips. Yin and yang. You know I love you but I need to say it because it's what I genuinely feel in my soul. I love you. Weather that's a person or a cat or a dog we all need to be noticed in this world. We were here. We were alive and lived.
Spot on, @@matthewguzda4075
Bible saw that coming, but nobody believes this old book. So many ancient but universal stories in there about people in their proper and in their pathology. But nah, who would've want to believe this stuff.
I was a teen in the late 2000’s and in my experience every step towards this social media dystopia has felt like a self imposed hell for likes, follows, attention, validation, and projecting a false image. We as individuals have created this environment we are now in through our choices and behaviors. Companies are just as happy as ever to make money off of addictions and weaknesses but it’s users that are the problems and users that suffer the most.
1:29:11 Even beyond broken families...for non-broken families, I think many Gen-Z girls have moms that are conflicted and it affects their daughters. The working moms aren't sure if they should've worked for the past 10-15 years b/c it took so much time away from their kids and families, while the stay-at-home moms aren't sure if they made the right life choice b/c they see so many other late 40s, 50 yr old women with successful, productive careers of their own. This is especially the case in the upper-middle class and up, the suburbs where kids buy therapy and girls want cosmetic surgery and the such.
I'm kind of describing a female mid-life crisis in both those cases of Moms. Either way, IMO I suspect that their daughters can sense, then learn and unknowingly mirror their mothers' conflicted inner self and lack of assuredness.
No. I am 53 and was a stay at home mom till my girls went to high school I have no issues with self-worth, but yet both my girls suffer from anxiety and depression. Their dad and I monitored the phones as best we could went they were in high school. But it's almost impossible to keep a teenager away from phones. It really is social media and how the algorithms work against young girls and boys for that fact.
@@Laura-hg9bk do you think if they were homeschooled the results would've been different in terms of their mental health?
I'm a 61 year old woman, worked my entire life. Married, had 1 child, divorced. Retired now. No issues.
Interesting thought. But I have home schooled both my girls in grade school for kindergarten and sixth grade. Both were socially accepted all through school. played sports, dance the whole nine yards. I guess my point is even the "normal" family unit has this issue with the gen Z girls. @@three_owl_night
The only internet kids need is on the family computer in the middle of the living room. Dumb phones are sufficient for communication.@@Laura-hg9bk
This entire podcast is talking about female-female competition in the context of the super-charging effect of social networks, without talking about it.
Another channel recently stated that only women understand women
And that's why they hate each other
Correct.
Even the lowest of female influencers can make TONS of money.
My friend was a lawyer and she did the contracts for influencers.
The money that these girls are bringing in is outrageous.
But, it makes sense considering that store are closing and influencers are the new sales reps.
@johnnyparatrooper1326 and yet it's only the top 1% that do. Everyone else pretends to be an influencer, while barely having a few hundred followers.
It's funny how porn was slammed for objectifying women yet social media isn't getting nearly the same amount of backlash. And feminism only wants to blame men for women's misfortunes?
I wrote a book called "the graysonian ethic" to my son (and got it published), and two chapters relate to personal failure: "failure is an option" and "when you make a mistake". Both emphasize the fact that failure is a multifaceted thing, it sucks but it can be beneficial and what matters when you do fail is to figure out what you're going to do about it. I mention it because of the discussion of the way pain and failure and risk are made to be the worst thing that can possibly happen and the key is to avoid it at all costs when in reality you just need to figure out how to be better tomorrow.
Also, a therapist saying they’re like a “bestie” is them misrepresenting themselves. It’s a lie. A therapist is not a friend. A friend doesn’t charge money, and doesn’t end the relationship when the payment stops. And I disagree, we don’t need more therapists and more therapy. People need friends, family, activities, a purpose, work, sunlight, mental stimulation, art, poetry, etc. and the outdoors. Looking for a therapist as a substitute for friends and getting a life is not going to work. And WHY do so many children and adults now need therapy ? A therapist goal should be to put themselves out of work, not 24/7 access in exchange for $$. And are they also pushing hey, buy this product from me for $$$ and it will solve all your problems . . .
I've met therapists like that. They're simply professional enablers & justifiers of women's shitty behavior, week after week, in perpetuity. My ex's therapist is this person.
Healthcare gives free access to people that are paid to listen to narcissistic gibberish then say "maybe you're a victim" then they apply for government funds and the therapist continues to bill insurance. If it were cash payments fewer people would sign up.
Very well said, I agree with every word you wrote.
they don't want to solve your problems, they just want your money
are you familiar with Ray Peat?
"We suffer more often in imagination than in reality" - Seneca
The increase in young female su i cide is a concern and shouldn’t be ignored.
However, the overall rate for males is still multiple times higher than females. the 75 and older male su i cide rate is something like 5x that of female rate (or 500% more, how’s that for shock).
Again, I’m not discounting any group in my comment, just that using a statistic that provides shock value versus the societal magnitude of su i cide rates is what I don’t like.
There's also the issue of attempts vs successes at it
still this doesn't change anything both issues of men and women are alarming @@BusinessWolf1
Nah they don't care, age old "men failing in society that's been set up against them, women most affected"
Reminds me of a shock value PSA that pointed out “25% of homeless people were women!”… or in other words 75% are men.
I’m not even bother that all of western society is centered around catering to women, I’m just irritated that millions of people still have the gall to pretend it’s the opposite.
no but you have to be responsible too... yes male suicide rates are through the roof... perhaps that could of been prevented... if girls suicide rates is increasing it could be useful to nip it in the bud but it gets out of hand... it could equally be a seasaw effect, where as mens suicide rates decrease womens increase due to the nature of the men and womens roles in society considering evolution and the sexual marketplace
Remember when BetterHelp sold all its customers data?
Pepperidge Farm and the FTC remembers.
The Alamo remembers
Thank you Chris for inviting hosts that have expertise/skills/knowledge/experiences etc and I can gain information and identify with what is spoken.
never been a better time to be a therapist
Therapy is still extremely stigmatised though. I study psychology and there are lots of people who don’t see its purpose - Particularly men.
I disagree. Therapists are obligated to give in to gender ideology legally right now. They will lose jobs if they even suggest that a patient may have other underlying pathology. That alone is enough to drive someone crazy
@@ADDjem-i7i”therapy” has been weaponized, politicized, and also filled with a lot of pseudoscience. So at this point it’s a mixed bag.
Just saw a documentary about how the Therapy profession has been overrun by woke Marxist ideologies like critical race theory. You can't even work in the field unless you subscribe to that. So that's not going to improve anything.
@@zaullizalde365As a man and a medical psychotherapist for adults of decades, a) it's not a good time to be a serious therapist at all. What passes for 'therapy' here would be described as the most *collusive* and unchallenging, unprofessional stuff in my trade. In my trade, ENDING therapy is discussed from the very beginning of therapy -- I don't know where to start, really b) The vast majority of the time we don't discuss gender. c) Therapy as a whole, even bona fide well trained therapy, is and has become less man-friendly. It is indeed more difficult to engage us. The worsening (but not the origin) is in part due to the establishment pushing the idea that our mental health problems are due to 'toxic masculinity', part of which is 'machoism' leading to 'not talking about your feelings'. Thankfully most of us see this as the grossly mistaken generalization that it is, and new movements have started. However many new 'magic pills', like weight-lifting therapy, do not actually address men's problems even though they alleviate symptoms.
Anyone with 1/2 a functioning brain cell knows social media is a death knell to many kids. While I think the internet is one of man’s greatest inventions I’m also sooooo glad the internet didn’t exist when I was kid growing up. I was in my mid 20’s when I first got online using AOL, Compuserve, and Prodigy. Watching the internet unfold and now the negative effects it has on people is a bit depressing. The internets positives are sadly reduced exponentially by its negative uses.
I'm a few years younger than you. The internet was a great place until about 2005. At that point high speed internet became ubiquitous, images and multimedia flourished, modern social media was born, and it turned into a corporate cesspool.
Freya India is doing great work.
I wish more women/people were as mature and level headed as this lovely lady.
The guest says that social media pressures young women, but this is a bit of a cop-out, and also lets their parents off the hook for giving kids a family life where their most exciting activity is staring at a phone.
Yeah I hate TV and phones they're my last choice. TV never. Phone when I'm desperate to avoid something. Like today 😂
Yes, concerned parents enroll their kids in lots of activities, like sports. If the kid is out playing hockey or soccer there's much less time and energy for social media.
I am a software engineer and naturally I spend my working time in front of screens, recently I have redesigned my living and bed room to be screen free zones, music comes from vinyl, tv has been replaced with board games, and a nice shelf of books, it has been life changing so far, having people over and just talk, no youtube no "hey look at the newest xyz", just having a good time
The issue is no one is living in the moments that are happening anymore....
how many guys have stopped caring and decided to just stay away from them? how many of us has reached the point where we realise they're not worth it? and how many still hold out hope that we could be the lucky few and fiind a decent one? or hope that the culture will change for the better?
Who needs a decent one? I've had many awful ones and they still made me very happy. Bottom line you guys all need love but are rejecting women as not good enough...that is the switch of gender roles completely. Your fault for internalizing conservative 'philosophers'.
no chaos lasts forever, humanity has always overcome all evil
@silvertone1 that is absolute nonsense and you know it.
@@jb894I don’t believe he does know it. He seems to believe that bullshit. I imagine him being a submissive based on that comment.
@@Up-hill-Battle you guys are so cute. Im' gen-x...i dont think submissive guys really existed among us to be perfectly honest. I've had many women..probaly 80% were 'bad girls' who cheated on me for sure or very likely looking back as an older guy...who cares. I didn't know at the time, what I knew was I had hot girlfriends to go out to eat, to weddings, to party with then come home and sleep with. All my friends did, we just tried to marry the best one eventually if/when we wanted kids.
Victim narcisism is the biggest problem I see.
Agreed. Imagine being that hot and complaining about how you're treated on social media. Guarantee she is treated better in her life than 99% of people
This was my ex. I was with her for 8 months-her bs gave me 24/7 anxiety. You have to be strong and pick these traits out early on and avoid these types of people at all cost.
@@jonkybeats same here man. Hate to be a sexist, but from what I can tell there's a whorle lot more of them than girls who can be reasonable, logical, and straightforward enough to be in a relationship with
Granted, we've all got problems and I wasn't any good to be in the relationship I am referring to, but I believe that one side of the gender spectrum causes a LOT more of the relationship issues in modern times. Especially when they have infinite amounts more freedom than us, usually with no scrutiny allowed
That's covert narcissism I think.
The reason gen x kids came out better is our boomer parents neglected the majority of us, and our grandparents made a huge impression for us. We are the remnant of the Golden generation, for having the best grandparents in over a hundred years or more.
She is a strong empowered queen. What happened to “you go girl”, “I am living my best life”?
That was a delusional lie.
I'm so glad I'm an old dude. Growing up at a time when people were sane and talked to each other. None of this social media garbage, never looked at tick toc or Instagram never will.
But TH-cam is better 🤷
Yes it totally is.
With the obnoxious ads plastered everywhere..
TikTok*
Couldn't agree more with you
I just found Freya on Substack and now I'm backtracking so hard. Can't believe I passed up this episode when it came out! She's amazing.
As a Senior PWP that has worked in mental health for 5 years, this girl is SPOT ON!
Yes, we should talk about our mental health. Although, everyone will have ups and downs - that's life. It's about building resilience.
Our waiting lists our enormous and I can't tell you the many young people refer themselves because they've had their first break up or their girlfriend/boyfriend is ignoring them. Meanwhile, I have another client who was a firefighter for 40 years dealing with complex PTSD who can't be seen yet because of the sheer amount of mild presentations coming through.
It's the equivalent of going to A&E with small cut.
the average modern woman has never been told no
absolutely and a lot of them have daddy issues so lack discipline
@@vince-n In most families the dads have been excluded from regular parenting. This is causing massive problems for both boys and girls.
My spine and entire body tell me no every day. You have no idea what you’re talking about.
100%@@DavidNotSolomon
@@bethanysmith2919i have no idea what your comment means! lol
I absolutely adore all you have to say Freya:) Thank you for sending out some relevant msgs for young people. Well done.
And thank you Chris for your insights and wonderful questions.... 'just right' kind throughout the episode. Well done you too..
They hit the nail on the head when they talked about how men have role models that help them better themselves, however women don't, because everyone is too afraid to talk to women in any way that could be perceived as "telling them what to do".
I often see/hear women giving advice that tells a woman to treat their partners in the exact opposite way they should be treating them in order to have the relationship that they want and women wonder why their relationship is so awful.
Big facts.
How many positive online female role models cancel out a negative role model in the home though? Because I think that's what's really lacking.
Unfortunately, women are receiving and tending to listen to advice that makes them feel emotionally validated in the moment, rather than being confronted with a painful truth head on, stewing on it and then accepting the wisdom within.
Women giving other women bad advice...shocking! 🤣
Candace Owens seems to me to be an excellent role model
As a Millennial with a Gen Z step kid, my observation is they were extremely coddled and don’t know how to handle anything.
Oh yes, I was so coddled when my mother spanked me over taking a few bandaids from the cupboard when I was 5, cause I was an accident prone kid and knew my mother wasn't going to come to my aid when I scraped my knee enough to drip blood.
@@audreydoyle5268Sounds like a lovely, caring and kind mother. /s
Sounds like you’re taking a personal issue out of context and projecting it onto an entire demographic of people 👍🏻 you don’t actually know anything lol
@@audreydoyle5268 And I'm sure you're a better person for it. Spare the rod, spoil the child.
Agreed
🇭🇳 fan here!
I love the subject of this video. I may have an unpopular opinion, but I believe many of these mental health issues are created in social media, but can be solved by bringing back people to reality and showing them real life problems or situations other people are facing. Not to undermine your issues, but to show you that your issues have solutions, or they are not as big as you think they are or simply that people pull through even in the middle of adversity.
People nowadays need more perspective and real life experience, to not live so wrapped into themselves.
Volunteering, specially in country like Honduras, can really ground you and make you realize what real life problems are.
In my 55 years of live, the one time I really noticed society & dating deteriorating almost over night, was the introduction of the cell phones, dating sites and then swiping date websites. It put way too much in the palm of peoples hands, especially women. Most do not know how to handle it. All the attention and false expectations.
especially women. don't be jealous
I knew dating would die once cell phones were common. We used to meet up with friends, go home to messages, call people back and make plans for another day. Now the person you're with may get a call and want to leave. Or take calls from a fling easily. When people had land lines you couldn't tell a fling "I've been at work the past 3 months". Now guys are hiding in the toilet to make calls while with another woman but not want the other to notice their disappearance so they could get laid by multiple.
@@terrorists-are-among-us Oh no, you couldn't do that with Filipina women. My ex filipina sniper could hack all your calls and email. Don't ask me how. I can tell she still does this despite being apart for the past 10 years. I did not cheat but think she was bi-polar, gas lighting and driving me sleepless and over the edge, cops showing up at my door, unable to function, So had to cut it loose just to keep a job and survive.
Great expectations. People growing up today, believe that everyone else is having a terrific life, so they get depressed. Everyone's life sucks, it's always been like this, get used to it, and start enjoying what you are and what you have, instead of expecting a wonderful life to be just handed to you.
This. I was grumbling about some minor deprivation or other when my son was about 7 and he said to me, "Have what you have, mom "
IOW be content. Be grateful.
The unrealistic expectations of life and the "I deserve" mentality. Which women are doing to themselves through social media.
While blaming men, so the problem never gets solved
As i grew up woman suddenly had all the good charakter traits, men got what has been left, the bad traits. Woman see themselves as the moral humans, therefore woman will not accept men giving them advice. The sisterhood created the echochamber to control the sisters, and all the sisters follow the bs without critical thinking. I have no idea how to get back to normal, but i think woman should take the iniciative to change.
Put the social media down ladies.
So they need a 1 man and that's not acceptable 😅
Give up the constant stream of attention? It will be a cold day in hell before that happens…
Will never happen, their currency is attention & validation.
It's so refreshing to see such a level-headed discussion of what's going on in society right now. No judging or ulterior motives; just two people telling it as it is. Don't be fooled into thinking this is just content for Gen Z / women. Everyone should see this to understand the problems that are affecting us all right now. Thank you for the insight.
As a Gen X'er, I feel partially responsible for, and I apologize for, the creation of the internet. What was supposed to be a simple repository of information has morphed into a dangerous social media influence machine.
Life became so much easier once I dumped apps like Facebook and Instagram.
I have youtube only... It's enough for me!
yeah, it's better. Only negative I see is that you're kind of alone in that decision. I feel like I'm the only one not on social media, my 60 year old mother is literally on Instagram and I can see her in real time change. (Ex: further from god, less traditional, more materialistic) She sees her friends and sisters on it and doesn't want to be left out.
Thank you for warning me not to go there, i never did in the past,it seems something was always telling me to stayaway from that and i did & i dont regret it.
just for some clarification that 128% increase in numbers for females can be misleading. in 2022 39,255 males did it and 10,194 females did it, and that is across all age groups. as per cdc website. also on website in the 10-24 age range 7,124 males and 6,529 females did it (an annual decrease of almost 9% for that age bracket with both sexes included, in the single year of 2022)
Precisely why I stopped watching when she said that.
This immediately jumped out at me. Why is she comparing middle aged white men to teen girls? Sounds like cherry picking. I couldn’t find the data she is talking about. Also the elephant in the room, as you point out, is the HUGE difference in absolute numbers between males and females.
Yep. She's yet another member of the group that thinks any time something is wrong for men then it's taking away from women.
What is "it?" Do I have to watch the whole video to find out or what?
@trevors6379 it is a word you are not allowed to say on youtube without removal/blocking of comment. a synonym for self-deletion
Met a 24 yr old at work who was more concerned about her following on instagram than about her job..always talking to different men on the phone before she texts her boyfriend that she loves him smh.felt sorry for the guy he said I love u back and he sounded genuine.Don’t get yourself in a hole like that.
So this is solved by not using social media?
Seems like a self-inflicted problem.
It needs to be monitored in the home from a young age.
God is dead and we have killed him.
The issue isn't the symptom , but the reason, which is lack of meaning.
Not only that meaning is lacking, but anti-meaning is prominent. Things like tiktok, youtube shorts, instagram etc.
Suicide of a whole civilization, and since I am in my 20's , and in my opinion , it's my and my generation's responsibility/goal in life to not let that happen.
@@Laura-hg9bk Oh yes, 'monitor' your child as they descend into madness. My mother did that with me and video games. 'Monitored' me as I actively dropped out of 8th grade to play Starcraft. The kids need more than monitoring. They need abstinence from these things until they're 21, same as drinking.
My ex had a lot of anxiety problems .....she dealt with that anxiety by doom scrolling on tik tok which made her more anxious. Or she'd be anxious because she hadn't cleaned her room, so I told her pick one thing to put up at a time and she yelled at me and just sat there being anxious instead of doing something.
@ubiwrongcomeatme3452 your laziness is your fault, it's not an issue with games it's an issue within you as an individual. Most people can self regulate and just because you can't doesn't mean our freedoms should be infringed upon. Touch grass
Attention. That is all. You get attention as a female by saying you're suffering. People pay attention to you as a girl when you're in pain. Attention is female currency.
Imagine if every time a young man said he was in pain, he would get offered sex to make him feel better. We'd be having a discussion about why so many young men are in constant pain.
hmmm this is an excellent point my guy.
@@ibizawavey8630 The most obvious answer is normally the correct one.
Oh really? Huh, maybe nothing is wrong with me, that must be why my doctors never listen when I say I can't sleep due to nightmares and chronic pain... hmm, yep, women are always listened to when we say we're suffering. It's not like I'm told "just take some panadol" for my cramps, when I've already taken 4-6 ibuprofen. Or "Oh you're just anxious, come back in a month and we'll see if those SSRIs are working... oh, they make you nauseous, jittery and give you worse insomnia? Well, they must be working then!"
"Oh you want your uterus removed, cause your periods are extremely painful and you don't want children? Well, what if your future husband wants kids? You need his permission,". "Oh you're anxious and depressed because your baby isn't latching and that's interfering with bonding? Well, you must be doing something wrong,". "You sure you haven't been fooling around with boys? We know how teenage girls get. You have got to be pregnant, there's no way it could be your appendix or ovary about to rapture,".
Everywhere we turn, women's health is dismissed. Men can walk into the doctor's office, complain about a minor pain and walk out with a prescription, maybe after the second or third appointment at most. For many women, it takes years for us to be even believed that our period cramps aren't in fact normal. Let alone any other health condition. Look up the diagnosis rate of endometriosis compared to male infertility. Men don't get diagnosed with mental illnesses as often because they don't mention they struggles. That on them. We get diagnosed with anxiety without even a proper work up, just boom "anxiety, nothing else". We're called hysterical while whimpering in pain, while you are too proud to get off your fcking high horse about needing to bend someone's ear.
@@audreydoyle5268 Goodness you're desperate for attention. Thanks for proving the point.
Of course not always… but I think you’re on target. I know a couple of older ladies who will engineer conflict and make up nasty shit, because they are lonely, and anything is better than being ignored
What an articulate and intelligent young woman. As someone that works with college students, this was an incredibly useful discussion. Thank you both
I wonder if/when it will ever occur to Gen Z girls to get off social media. Will they develop the discipline and wherewithal? Your guest is an incredibly articulate and effective communicator who hopefully will be able to help some of them.
The parents are to blame! Parents are supposed to guide children into the right direction because kids don’t have the self control and the connection to consequences that adults do. Don’t blame the teens and kids, blame the parents who know better.
When FOMO rules you, you can never rule yourself.
It’s like Kanye West said “They want to monetize and traumatize”. SMH
people ALL need to stop focusing on the outside of their bodies and start working on their character and vocations
I find it interesting that the pendulum is currently on blaming men for not stepping up, not taking care of themselves, not keeping their shit together and being ultra-competitive in the dating market, but I see it swinging in the other direction within the next 10 years.
It’s always in a cycle. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
You’re too generous. I say next 5 years.
It’s already swinging back now with so many men choosing to go their own way, free of woemyn and toxic romantic relationships …
@@ma3stro681 I don't think that's the answer for me. I chose to work on myself and I have many options now. There are good women out there but hard to find.
Everything is being pathologized . EVERYTHING!
They mention a statistic though, in the beginning, right...I guess...?
She used the phrase "algorithmic conveyor belt". The website stimulates a person's anxiety in order to hold its audience.
What I’m gonna say I don’t care what she says. It’s basically hook up culture OF and porn is what screwing up modern dating these days
The posts about reasons not to have kids make me so sad. I had a miscarriage and one of my sons was stillborn at 9 months with no health problems (he got tangled in his umbilical cord and developed a clot). But I went through IVF to get pregnant again after trying the natural way for more than a year and I did it because being a mom is transcends all other forms of happiness. It is a happiness with true meaning that is basically indescribable. Is being a parent hard? Yes. But would I give it up to take trips to Bali and have regular boozy brunches? HELL NO!!! Motherhood and fatherhood is a gift from God on so many levels.
If someone doesn't want kids, fine. But the pro and con list is made in ignorance. You can't understand the pros.
Although I'm a man who knew very early on that I don't want to have kids, I agree with you 100%. I've heard about the line of thinking "children are a burden" etc and I think it's actually vile. I mean most of those people probably shouldn't be parents anyway but trying to influence others that way is not right. I believe having a stable family is absolutely a blessing and having kids is a big part of that. What about all the couples who experience miscarriages or can't have children? I would also say that to "pro choice." They made their choice when conceiving (except rape) all they are choosing to do is end life. Anyway, I'm glad you shared your comment and sorry you had to go through that.
I respect you. Sorry about the loss of your children.
People are being taught and trained to orbit their trauma as central to themselves instead of being supported in not letting their trauma dominate.
Is it possible to acknowledge our trauma and persevere through it?
@@allenwarfieldwe can acknowledge the death of a loved one, mourn their passing then return to life. Why should our trauma be any different?
@@Engrave.Danger dunno how many people you've lost in your life but i carry them with me always, sometimes fondly sometimes not so. its okay to have those feelings and acknowledge them when they're there.
Trauma becomes their identity.
@@allenwarfieldYes, by detaching from it.
This is what meditators do.
Just happened across this video. Actually, first time I've come across both of you. Both of you seem "reasonable and logical." Most definitely impressed with Ms India's calm, reasoned approach to the items addressed. The world could use more of young ladies like her. Good interviewer and interview Chris...
She's so gentle and soft spoken. ASMR for sure.
Women most affected.
I care as much about women as women care about men.
Care as much as which women...the worst of us?
Genuinely if that's your attitude, all you do is ensure that the good ones steer well clear of you too.
is it "as women" or "als women". ALS is a pretty terrible disease, right. But then... that makes no sense.
Also the statement is pretty neutral. When there are women that care about men a lot, then you seem to care about women a lot, too. Sounds fair to me :)
@@tempsodathe worst is not a small or exceptional minority, that's the issue. Your 'kind' is clearly the problem, the data is not murky on this
@@dreamingmusic3299and with that, we couldn't race each other to the bottom faster. Such a bright future for all!
@@killjoyredux8361 thankfully I spend enough time in the real world to realise that these comment sections usually represent the worst of your 'kind'.
Men struggling: who cares
Women struggling: oh no! we have a huge problem!
Maybe if women rethink, they might be more appealing to men and bridge the gap between women and men.
28:05 I remember both of the times I found out I was going to be a father, like it was yesterday. The rush of emotions, the mixture of joy and anxiety. My boy riding his bike without training wheels for the first time. I still have pictures and of those times, but I think it's so important to experience the moment first and take a snap later.