How to handle people who gossip about you; spread false rumors
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ต.ค. 2013
- I got a question from a viewer about what to do when someone says things about you that aren't true. We'll talk about what to do and not do in these types of situations.
Marie Dubuque is a life coach who loves to give advice on everything from dating dilemmas and tricky social situations to drama-filled friendships and romantic relationships gone south! - แนวปฏิบัติและการใช้ชีวิต
So sad people believe them lies I hate to see people destroying peoples lives smh out of jealousy
thats what it is jealousy like when my ex was jealous so he said my mum wanted a abortion
Stupid people who have low iq believe the lies and they woulda been future haters anyways so they dont matter. All reasonable people and people who matter care about is the actual truth. They are the only ones that matter anyway
@@pamelabibby8642 OMG! How nasty!
Gossip borders on slander. Those people hate themselves but they think they hate you
These are people that are so jealous of u they want to kill u but since they dont want to do the jail time for it their weak cowardly butts will resort to the next low lifeded activity which is to kill your character and character assassinate you. They feel like the more people they can get to view you negatively the more chance they can stop your progress in life. These types are the scum of the earth, lower than a snakes belly and deserve to suffer all their lives and have a slow painful, agonizing horrible death. Karma keeps long long long receipts and never forgets an address. How could you think u will ever have good come your way when you operate like this???
"What other people think of you is not your business. If you start to make that business your business, you will be offended for the rest of your life." -Deepak Chopra
poisonhemlock thanks so much..and I thought depak chopra was no good...this is a great phrase which helps me
Thanku
Thank you ☺️
People have been falsely accused and been sent to prison, the mental ward it is their business.
@@michelej9496 Yes!
Smart people see through gossip and anyone who cares about you don’t listen to gossip
Very well stated!
They're TOXIC...
THEY ARE TOXIC POISON
Kevlynn Wi the taste of your lips I'm on a ride you're toxic
Jxnna MSP BAHAH Well said omg I love Britney
❤
when someone spreads rumour about me, i dont even give them any attention. bcuz the people that are real wont believe in them. only the people who are fake will follow like mindless sheep. theres an old sayin that still remains true to this day. "rumors are started by haters, spread by fools, and accepted by idiots". so i cud give 2 shits who believes in the false rumors about me. its not like they are smart enuff for me to even value them in the 1st place. somthing to think about. peace
jstar_94 t-dot_west-end Preach It!!! OMG I love your statement!!!
Well said!!
Thia comment is way under rated !!!! 👏🏼
I had a bad rumour about me shooting up a school that is not true
Very true
Always keep everything to yourself. One of the best advise. I learned it the hard way in life.
I’ve definitely learned this! Outside of a couple trusted friends, I keep everything to myself, including me😂😂😂. Basically, I stay away from most people because I’m always having to watch what I say.
There's a woman at work who constantly flirts with me but I have no interest in her. After a year of ignoring her aggressive overtures (asking personal questions about who I find attractive, coming in my office and rubbing my neck and shoulders, etc) she decided to start rumors that I'm gay.
She's one of the nastiest people I've ever met.
She mad cuz you didn't her the "D" bro.. you dodged a bullet!
Something similar is happening to me. In my case, it's a guy and he is so believable as I am introverted with no one and he is extroverted with absolutely everyone. He and his friends are portraying me as a bad person which I am not. He is putting 100% effort to make sure he brings me down.
yep been there down that it's a terrible feeling I know just rise above it be a light house in the storm
It's best you didn't fall in for her , you know that kind of nasty ugly people women then spread rumors of guys intimacy and control your life there narcissist..having A rumor about a guy being gay is way easier than if she would have gotten into your personal life trust me
Noticed that alot of young people responded. Im 62 and have felt the sting of gossip all my life. Im quite and keep to myself but gossip always seems to follow me. I've lost friends, jobs and family members because of their belief in hurtful gossip. I feel sad, alone and unloved. No one wants to hear how I've been hurt... The only thing that keeps me going is my belief in Jesus and His promise of eternal life. His unconditional love for me and the touch of His finger as He wipes away my last tear before I die.
Write your story, Katie. Get it out of your head and onto paper. I have lost family and a career because of awful people running their mouths with slander.
If you would like, you can add me on Facebook if you need a friend that will believe you, I have been through this as well. I'm turning 30 but have been through this from a family member since I was young and it truly is isolating, my heart hurts for you
Katie, what has happened to you has happened to thousands of others so do not think it is you alone. Believe in yourself and your values and do not let malicious tongues destroy your self confidence. It happened to me many years ago and although 99% was pure lies it hurt and it is still painful. Sad thing is that those with the most vicious mouths and minds were doing it to take the spotlight off their own behaviours. Worse still they were teachers - passing on their ways (subliminally) to the very people they should have been caring for - children.
I've suffered like u. For me it's within family. Right now I'm not on speaking terms with the only sibling I'm left with, younger sister. She has so much poisonous power her gossip and meanness is unstoppable. I've decided to cut her out of my life forever. Let's focus on ourselves and those who love us. Do whatever u can to heal ur heart. The universe is coming for them with karma that will make history.
@@mathehanyane6246 i am sensitive person, who has walked away from my entire family for the same reasons. I encounter people at work-mean girls, a rude doorman, & know it's about them -not me. But, it does bother me, it's out there. I'm smart, kind and creative- but, no tolerance for cruelty. So, i just move on grieve the fairy tale family and seek love and joy in nature animals and a few good friends.
Not worrying about it too much is important, but in my experience, there are times where it is necessary to say something, depending on the nature (nastiness) of the rumour, or because it is turning into harassment.
Canadian97467 One of my boyfriend’s friends started talking shit about me to him literally behind my back and he told me. She’s a jealous bitch 😢
Use rumours to your advantage.
The people get highlighted.
When you finally become a successful human being, Always remember the people who stood by you.
What you mean by the people getting highlighted
I live in australia and workplace bullying seems to be a STANDARD and accepted part of culture here, ESPECIALLY by 'management'. Malicious gossip has caused me a lot of stress and depression. The stupid thing is it's usually started by one person who spreads it, then before you know it a whole bunch of people have an opinion about you based on one person's opinion who's wrong to begin with! People can end up being totally ostracized within a workplace. Gossip is TOXIC POISON and a very understated type of bullying.
2 years later totally agree. One person spreads it and then people believe it even though they have never met that person they talked about
Sounds like Jamestrong ltd nz , same over here , part of the culture .
Avoid and ignore people who gossip don't even say hi to them.
I tried being silent many many times. Many times the gossiper will think he/she has simply won and won't hesitate to bother you a second time, as you're obviously no threat. Now I find it more effective to argue back. Some of them actually stay out of my face now.
" Genuine Caring people" don't exist in this world anymore.
Tony Montana Probably in your proximity. Genuine caring people do exist. Hard to believe but true
Tony Montana sad
We do we're just introverted!
Kayla-Marie I AGREE...I'm also introverted!
it is but rare..
Star, I will do it. Remember, this person is picking on you, not because you are ugly, but because he/she has serious self esteem issues.
I'm having a hard time right now. This guy who was my friend, gossips about me almost everyday in school. He's trying to take all of my friends. And now I have less and less friends. Now I'm doing exactly what you said. Thank you so much 💗😙
Same i don't know what to do
You don’t have to worry about those people or that “friend”. What you need to focus on is you. Work so hard and excel so much that they become BENEATH you. If you’re are student, focus on getting perfect grades, multiple large scholarships and things that will help you shine. It will be a slap in all of their faces when they see how well you are winning. The words will hurt but the power is in ignoring it.
If your friends are being taken away, they werent friends to begin with, just aquaintances....i would firmly but gently stand up to the gossiper and ask why he is doing that to you.....do that in front of your other "friends" and see what happens
This just happened to me, helped me a lot. Thank you so much!
Same
😄
1.Act like it doesn't bother you
2. Don't react it gives them power.
3. people will forget about what he said because they will stop listening to them.
7 and a half years later I still heard lies about me and my family. Thanks for the god pan straightforward advice I will try to follow what you said more. Although I have been doing this I'm going to do it more.
And there are a few more things remaining here. Rumors and gossipers are like weapons of mass destruction which will also dominate celebrities forever, Marie. They can't just spread false rumors about you, but also your family, too. Take important precautions.
Unless someone spreading rumors with some facts to get people to believe them then starts to lie more and more but adds some truth to it in order to get everyone to believe them. I know someone who nearly got beat down bad because of rumors. It's scary to think that people and bullies are finding ways around these messages in order to fulfill their agenda but now and days they are aware of others ignoring you and if they are out there to get you...
I apologize to all who I have hurt through gossip and other means
apologize personally and not in the internet lol
@mlemsmr7551 I know this person in real life. Thank you for telling them to do it in real life. After I found out they were gossiping about me, I beat the absolute crap out of them. So thank you
I was really feeling frustrated and stressed about this same issue, it was really getting to me. I'm glad I listen to this video you really helped me. Thank you!!!!
gossipers and rumor mongers show their true colors!!
You would think that after a certain age, people would stop acting like it's high school. I used to be best friends with someone on my collegiate rowing team. A lot of weird things happened within our friendship. Feelings got incredibly confused and we eventually started fighting. People on our team were picking sides. I heard she was going around making a mockery about me. I got mad, retaliated vivaciously, and she told on me to higher authorities in our college. We had a nasty school case against each other. After 6 months of this case, nobody got in trouble and both of us were let off the hook. I went out with my friends the other day to a bar. She works at that bar. And then when a friend of mine walked in to hangout, right before he talked to me, she jumped in front of me and grabbed him. One of my friends can read lips, and she found out that they were talking about me. Now that one friend that walked in and got snatched up by my ex friend won't even talk to me. Can't believe my ex friend can't get over stuff. Didn't know we were still 5.
Sophia Kopasakis you would think that but sadly they ingest too much food and fluoridated water
Omg I’ve dealt with this too. She ran her mouth to a guy friend then came back to our shared apartment banging on my bedroom door one night and told me my guy friend didn’t want to talk to me anymore bc she had “told him the truth about me” in other words a wildly aggressive and exaggerated story she concocted to make herself look like a hero
This guy actually did stop talking to me after that but I think it was a mixture of reasons I did ask him about this and he claimed he has no idea what she was talking about
True, Myself, if a story smells like rumor, I immediately switch off and don't believe a word. Gossip is for gossipers. Who believes in gossip, is a gossiper him/herself. Fry with your gossips, I have better things to believe in than fried rumors inflated by gossipers twisted minds. Thank you for the inspiring video. xx
Thank you this helps a lot someone continue to spread rumors about me and I always cry I have depression and social anxiety and if I stand out and stick up for myself I know I can be strong and fight the rumors.
Thank you!! I am scared about drama being spread about me because I talk to much and tell to many secrets 😢😢
You know what's sad. When I found the church I Ioved and connected with, Christians within the church began spreading rumors about me. The last place I expected was gossip inside a church, especially some of the followers I considered my friends.
I love what you said ' people will comment about you regardless so be who you really are.'
My husband loves to gossip about me. His gossip has made his family hate me. He calls them when we argue and then tells them his 1 sided story. This has created a huge grudge I have for him. This has been going on for years. It has made me feel like everyone thinks I'm a horrible person.
Dealing with this at work. My co-worker is spreading rumors about me and telling all the newbies at my job not to speak with me. He's mad because I put him in his place now he's out to gather a group of supporters to ruin my good name. I'm not quite surprised at his actions as he suffers from EXTREME low self-esteem and is simply intimidated. I know that there will be a day when everybody will see right through his gossiping ways.
SHERAYAMILI you are right. But in the mean time, I know this is tough. Just hold your head high and go on with your work. If people see you are not reacting to the rumors, they won't either.
Marie Dubuque
dear Marie, do you think you should block someone who's not your friend or spouse anymore, but uses another profile and posts bad things about you? pls I'd need some help on this.tyvm
+Angel V u should. and jus avoid them. don give that person the power
thanks
+SHERAYAMILI It's so childish what he's doing. It's comical. He needs to grow up.
They judge because they have nothing because they cant reach what you achieve in life. ignore them
Thank you so much this will help my granddaughter because there has been alot of people spreading fake rumors and has been gossiping
Listening to her makes me feel that everythings gonna be alright❤️🤟
Everyone believes the lies because it suits them.
They are all cut from the same cloth 🥰
There are a few people at my work that make me feel uncomfortable no matter how you handle the situation, it just gets worse. Fuck this I'm just gonna make me some voodoo dolls.
Ha !! Exactly it's so frustrating.
What if when you been fired from your job because of gossip?
Honestly this has helped me a lot with a significant others babymomma and i feel 10X better about the whole situation im in. thanks love
If the gossiping and rumors cost me my job, someones catching hands in the parking lot and you won't even see me coming.
Doug Life nah it’s gonna cost them their life fuck all that
PERIODT 😂
It almost cost my own life
The thing is the more they spread rumors to random people ( people who don't know you ) they will believe the tales :/
So if you don't confront them and prove them wrong it's your image which will go down :/
Exactly
So many idiots out here still dont understand you cant believe everything you hear about a person. These types have never been successful at anything to understand having haters and how they operate. smh but successful people and smart people know exactly what it is!
This is good advice! I just went through this and followed your advice and it worked! I Kept a smile on my face and ignored it and all went away! It’s like the gossip and lies that we’re being said about me just vanished!
Gossip changed my life and I’m always grateful for it. Because it empowered me to prove that what people said about me was false and make something of myself.
Now every time I think of the gossips I’m so grateful for them. Yes it took years to get here but I truly believe God puts people in our path for a reason, even gossips.
My ex started a rumor that I cheated on him and now there's a girl who is going around spreading rumors about me 😂 like really? You're that insecure about yourself!
Well you women are most of the time extremely insecure
Subbed... I really want to confront this person. I thought they were my friend but I found out all this nonsense they were talking about me all the time. I was always very nice to her. She only has the friends she has because I introduced her to mine. She made up stories and turned people against me. My real friends decided to turn against her for what she did. So I guess I should be thankful. But I do have to see this person and deal with them at events and I really want to confront her.
SuperImprovGal hi there I would not waste my time n energy. It's like this lady says " don't give them the power. With people like this the silent treatment kills them honest it does!! Like you said your proper friends have stood by you. The other friends who have took her side are not your friends but give them time they might smell the morning coffee n see that horrible person for whatch she is! All in good time
Your words gave such a big help. Really appreciate it. God Bless Madame.☺
Thank you so much for your kind words.
I usually just deny everything. Especially high school boys, they love to spread stuff and say this and that. But if you just laugh and say “who?” It gets easier🙂
I used to hang out with people who lied different people like friends, family members, complete strangers and each other. They complain about the stupidest of things and they spread rumours about me.
Thank you for the honest advice. You are a Blessing in my life,Marie.
Marie - Thank you so much for this... Which is in fact this thing is happening to me right now and before I watched your video I have already been doing to what exactly to what you were saying. I just couldn't explain it in words like what you have told... You made things crystal clear and credible for me to believe in the state of living where I am right now... Thank you so much. The world is never alone with people as such as you... Always - North Borneo
Thank u Marie, so much for the honesty I'm in middle school and that's when everything starts like rumors, bullying, and other kind of stuff but u got me thru a lot of those situations cause if it wasn't for u I wouldn't be here right now. So thank u 🙌
I’ve put two and two together and realised people are saying things about me by piecing little bits of info together. Little sly comments I’ve been receiving have finally clicked. I’m crying because I don’t know how to address these horrible assumptions
Thank You!!! Every bit of reassurance is great and what you're saying is true 👍
North, thank you for your kind comment. So glad I could help.
Thank you so much, I was so anxious before watching this and I am definitely feeling a lot better. Thank you.
i cried watching this because i am trying to stop false rumours about me
I've been having a really rough time, and I really needed to hear this... Thank you.. really made me feel alot better...
Even 9 years later seeing this video was extremely helpful as I am going through a hard time right now but thank you
People are spreading rumors about me are barely letting me have a chance to react. They are spreading it behind my back, telling people not to tell me. Of course I found it. It's really annoying because people are actually believing it. Before this whole thing happened, a lot of people sat next to me at lunch and in the classroom, now there is 2 people that sit with me. I hate it
people who don't even know me spread rumours about me ..even my so called girlfriend gets in on the act when we argue ..I told her they are just using her to get to me but she is just as bad as them when it comes to making me look bad ...I think I gonna dump her because I am sick of her back stabbing me..
Marie, I just wanted to say that your'e amazing! I'm going through a tough time in my life right now, and your'e like my second mom (haha). I really need advice now so I'm watching your videos over and over again, and they help me SO much. I always have your words in the back of my head, and it makes me do better choices, become more confident, and become a happier human being. Thank you.
Spot on. Thank you for great advice 😊
Wow! This is so timely, I've been dealing with this mentally about the people who gossips about me and spread false accusations. You have a wonderful advice, thanks! Also, people need to read what the Bible says about it and put it into application. God Bless!
Thank you so much. U words are the soothing balm I needed. x
Help me. My ex best friend is spreading rumours about me and talks shit about me and is telling my secrets to everyone. I think she is going to turn everyone against me. I do have my real friends. I just want drama in my life to stop. I dont care about the rumours but I feel like everyone knows everything about me now and they hate me. I am not giving her the power and I am not giving in. Is there anything I can do to make this better please help me.
+ChristaGamer*** you are doing the right thing...you are not allowing this toxic person to bring you down. I am sure you are not the first or the last person she is spreading rumors about. She is seriously jealous of you. Hold your head high and move on. People will judge you for you...not based on her gossip. This will blow over. And when she realizes her malicious behavior is not going to upset you, she won't try it again.
+Marie Dubuque Thank you so much for replying! I love your videos and your personality!😄❤
Micheal Johnson I support you
Has a serious problem with envy. probably a sociopath.
They are Sociopaths
I don't know if you're still on this platform but I want to thank you; this is some great advice and you have made me feel better about my situation as of late. Thanks
From the bottom of my heart, thank you ❤
Thanks Marie. I really needed this about now.
Thanks for posting this! You really helped me alot!!!
Thanks for that
My problem is that in middle school for me people are so fake and rumors get around fast and people always think I have a crush on this person who I’m just friends with =(
SS, thank you so much. You made my day.
When it is your mother and sister who lied !!!! It is very sickening and devastating, but I am so glad God showed me their truth amen be safe may God bless🙏🙏🙏
Thank you so much... i feel much better now.
I needed to hear it ! Thank you !
Great advice! Thank you.
I needed to hear this today.
Thank you for sharing this Marie
You are so right ! Thank you ❤
I lost a friend to a very clever trouble maker . He lost lots of friends and ended up just with her. And then she moved on .
This was extremely helpful, thank you.
Thank you for that , something has been bothering me alot lately , i wouldn't say im completely over it , But this makes it easier for me thx
I needed this thank you so much for your words❤️
My ex-best friend was gossiping about me about apparently i was flirting with a girl, who turns out to be a lesbian, yet all i said was hello.
Funny what can happen, when people don't get their facts right, isnt it?....
Excellent piece of advice. I appreciate you.
All I do is laugh and say "you are correct. I am a such a bad human but you must be superhuman because you're perfect. I am Green with Envy. ":) LOL
You said an mouth full thank you
This is very helpful thanks
most people who hear rumors about me think it's true even outside of school people are spreading them and now people are making theories out of a false statements about me it hurts a lot I was called a "whore" and everyone believes it...they even told my crush and people I wanted to know😔
Skg G that is very true, and I'm sensitive so its hard for me to ignore it😞i don't feel that I am strong enough
Good video. Can you do a video on how not to feel bad when someone calls you ugly. My self esteem is low because Ive been called ugly my whole life.
MD,
Thank you very much. I am dealing with a toxic person that is constantly gossiping and talking about me. I think she is angry because I have become the trainer and that was her position. I am going to get a copy of the employee handbook and see how they want these situations handled. I don't want to file a formal complaint and have gotten some great tips from you and other vids. again. Thank You. BV
Marie, you are so great ! Thank you - : )
When you a reject a guy and they start spreading false lies.
Genuine caring people are very few in this world. It's not every one who gets to know them
The stuff about this is they pick a place to spread them like etc closet practice room , classroom , like anywhere
My entire town is a bunch of gossipers. My husband works 50 miles away from our small city. They hired a dude as a helper from here. That dude was telling him they are saying that he ran over someone at 5am in the morning. Like, wtf? Oh, and he’s a vampire with dead bodies in his back yard. I seriously don’t know how these people FUNCTION with brains like this.
Do NOTHING. Eventually their true colors will paint their own picture 💯🤣✌🏾
Thank you so much Marie
Someone is spreading info about me that is true... Every time I walk the hallways I see him telling people. One lesson I've learned is to not lie. I tried to lie to cover up the truth. Lying will only make it WORSE.
Thank you so much. My bosses are big gossips. One of them hates me and has been telling stuff about me for years. He's such a hateful person.
I blocked a colleague because I realised she was envious and too curious about my life, and then she asked me in front of everybody why I had blocked her. I got mad because she said that and I told her I didn't like her. I know I reacted and that people see me as the villain. But now she has to wear that mask of a victim. I know it's too heavy for her, so people will tell how she is eventually. I wish I had had more control over my emotions that day. At first I felt released for not having to pretend anymore. And then I realised that I had lower my standards and went down to her level.