Story 1 therapist here.. iq of 80 means mild intellectual disability. It IS a disability a mental disability. I realy don't understandstand the comments from people in that story. He ain't lazy, he just don't understand the things he needs to learn in school. Do i agree with giving him everything definite NO. More wise is to give op everything let her handle the estate and pay something from the profits to her brother. Example if the rent the home out. They can split the money. That helps him more than this set up.
The brother can be helped with a full retaking of the IQ test, along with disability screenings/diagnosis, capability tests, the works. I had that done when I lost my old diagnosis papers and it helped me immensely to get the fresh look on what I both could and could not do. That OP owes those parents exactly as much as OP was given. The legal minimum. Which in the case of an adult toward their parents means nothing. Those parents can hire people who can manage their estate, manage their son's needs and their old-age assistance if they have such a healthy nest-egg. Let the Op enjoy a life of no pressure or obligation. That peace is priceless.
Bc OP clearly added this vital info in an edit. Just bc he can't get legal disability payement doesn't mean that having the iQ of a 12yo as an adult isn't 100% a disability.
Came here to say something similar. It seems like the parents did him a major disservice. The sibling does not have to care for him, but the lack of empathy.. wow
And they have classes in school for those between the IQ of special needs and general education but it sounds like the parents didn’t enroll him or do anything to actually help him.
parents probably talked him down 'oh the teachers are just not good at their jobs' kind of talks. at least he tried something, how many stories have we heard of brothers who are functioning adults who sit at home al day playing video games and saying they expect the actual adult sibling to pay for their life once the parents are gone.
Thanks to being their 'special little boy' he hasn't failed to launch - they never let the plane leave the hanger from a young age and now he's miles behind everyone else.
RE: Traditional What OP described is NOT traditional, unless you have been in a Traditional Cult. Traditional families consist of Men being faithful and supportive of their family. Not cheating consistently, and women Divorcing men who cheat, not cow towing to them OP needs to dump Sarah and ignore any and all threats and sob stories.
The brother isn't lazy, he is actually in need of some help but it is for the parents to figure out what they will do for his care and their care. They ought to just hire a POA.
Did any of those commenters hear the bit where the OP said her brother has an IQ of 80. He is not a smart man. Learning rote tasks is all he will ever be capable of. He will know this. I very much doubt he is "lazy" as such. OP NTA.
And depending on what age he was when they gave him the iq test it could've actually changed. They should get him retested and go from there. It's for sure not ops job too take care of him. Sounds life her parents are pretty well off.... maybe they should spend some of that money trying to get him better situated. As op suggested, maybe a trust to dole out money to the brother.
They should have him fully diagnosed. A capability test, IQ test, disability diagnosis, everything. Like I had to take. It helped me immensely to have my limitations explained by people with degrees to the people who used to call me lazy. Also it made WAY too much sense when it was all laid bare and still helps me to this day to know which things to avoid to not break myself and which things to keep doing despite the discomfort to not regress in the skills I've worked hard to obtain and polish.
a lot of my coworkers are like this, it's almost scary being one of the 'smarter ones' at the job site especially since we had a lot of relatives who believed I was a simpleton.
S3 (after the edit): Sarah is an abuser, and she was setting up OP with her creepy friend to get SA'd. Because Sarah has so thoroughly convinced everyone in her orbit besides OP that she's an angel (including OP's parents) and that OP is the bad guy, Sarah will only continue to escalate the situation until OP is actually harmed in some way. Since OP can't move out, she needs to start gathering proof of Sarah's lies and manipulation in order to protect herself. Considering Sarah is willing to commit self-harm to get her way, OP has even more reason to break away from Sarah! Op also has to realize that she's an adult now, and nobody's entitled to her friendship. She needs to look up DARVO and grey rocking and cut those toxic influences from her life.
I have a friend with an IQ of 86, he's looking completely normal self-sufficient guy. Lives by himself, works, worked overseas. Absolutely nothing different with him. Dropped out of college for computer science, but it was boring for him, I would drop out too. I struggle to see how op's brother could be that much unable to support himself. Maybe parents didn't let him learn life skills.
Story 2: OP has the upper hand against her friend in this story. OP's version is essentially protecting her virtue while her friend was willing to pimp her out pre-marriage. In the traditional family dynamic, this could work in OP's favor, but she'll need to get ahead of this. Inform her family why she's cutting contact with the friend before she does it so she doesn't get scapegoated after. Hopefully*. *OP's family also sounds like they need very little excuse to be awful to her.
yea Sarah just knows that all she will ever be is a broodmare while op is creating a way out, scary thought here. she hoped he would attack her and get her pregnant or at least taint her so the parents would force her to marry and drop the college.
So 70-75 is the average to be considered disabled and the brother passed by 5-10 points 👀 If I lose half my foot but can still use my nub- Am I disabled or not? Walking would be VEERY difficult but I can still walk right? Ask yourself that Simple thing is parents are crappy but the brother still needed help
But parents want to leave EVERYTHING to him and did SO MUCH MORE for the adult son than they did for their daughter from the time she was 17 years old. Bro needs help, but it doesn't need to be the sis. He can't handle his affairs, but they want to leave a $1,000,000+ estate to him with his sister hardly getting anything, not even as the estate manager, but being in charge of looking out for him! Just NO!
@deborahpinkey1264 question if you see someone bleed out on the street. You are going to treat them like the person standing there with a paper cut. Do call know what equitable means.
Sounds like that first OP just needed to let those parents know she will put in as much effort as they have. Which appears to be the legal minimum. And the legal minimum a child owes their parents is... nothing.
Last story: Am I losing it? If OP's family missed her so much, why couldn't they come to see her. Obviously she was mainly trying to avoid talk of her loss and her sister's pregnancy, she didn't say she was against talking to her other family members otherwise. That they made such a big deal about her leaving is crazy. And why couldn't the hubby go back with the son? She was upset, yes, but they didn't have to stay away out of solidarity. Just weirdness all around IMO and not by OP.
7:11 Ha! No. OP is NTA. She chose to set a reasonable boundary and he CHOSE not to respect it. And "friend" cares more about being right than OP'S feelings and boundaries
And let’s not forget that he repeatedly did not respect OPs boundary and furthermore he grabbed her. I honestly think if OP stayed, he would’ve tried to drug her if available
No, the parents need to set up any money they leave him to be in a trust. And the sister should not be in charge of it, because it will mess up any relationship they still have.
@@brookelynnwu8016Fair has nothing to do with it. They obviously have no intention to leave her anything. If they are determined to leave it all to the brother, they need to set it up so he won't spend it all.
An intellectual impairment doesn't mean they can't do things. Generally speaking people with an intellectual impairment of that range are amazing at finding adaptive strategies to find success on their terms.
Brother has more like a disadvantage than a disability in my opinion. But meh, its just words. On the other hand, he totally shouldn't recieve all the inheritance unless he proves he can manage it and not transferit to a nigerian prince.
@@SergioBicerrathere was a woman who lost her life savings by giving it to a scammer who used AI to pass themselves as Keanu Reeves. I’ve heard another one where someone used Jennifer Aniston
That's not a guy just being a guy. Tell your 'friend' she is not a friend, she is literally ok with setting you up to be assaulted. Was her plan to have him take advantage of you or force himself on you?
What lies did she tell Jake about OP? That OP is 'open for anything'? If Jake had 'harmed' OP in any way, the friend should also be charged with conspiracy to those crimes and being an accessory
Last story : if the roles were reversed everyone would be saying that she has a right to be happy & not ashamed of her pregnancy & that her sister can't just expect to never see her niece or any child ever. It's so interesting when ppl also are biaised by taling the side of who tells the story
S2: To the unhinged matchmaker/shipper, there's nothing more important to the fantasy in their head. Update; yeah, friend is the average shipper. Gotta love the 'Yeah i know my friend is toxic, but we've been friends since school...'.
It's not just shipping. Her friend lacks empathy; routinely threatens her with self-harm and suicide; and her friend is the golden child between both families, so if OP tries to cut her off, OP's parents will view her as the bad guy. She's in the orbit of an abuser, and financially can't leave it right now.
Miscarriage story .. went through the same thing only my ex was not empathetic, nor was his family because wouldn't want to upset pregnant sister in law . She was understanding when I didn't feel like staying in the hospital room with her and her new baby. ( I was there the month before recovering from the D&C. Her mum was also very understanding.
Why would you stay where you aren't respected? Your brother needs to get on husband mother and sister's case not yours. When you are nasty, guess what people do not want to be around you. You need to talk to your dad though. Keep your distance from the rest, they aren't people you need around you.
Op needs to understand that the brother is reality very stupid.i it's not weaponized incompetence. He's truly incompetent. My brother is like him. It's not he won't do it. He can't understand how or what he's doing
The US military won't take anyone with an IQ under 83 because there no tasks that they can do. If your brother's IQ is 80, his issue isn't laziness. Imagine being in a math class with geniuses and not being able to understand what they are saying but being expected to succeed. No matter how hard you try you can't figure it out. Your brother is overwhelmed. He will forever be the person in the room who just doesn't understand. That is not his fault. He may not be disabled, but effectively he is closer to it than having the average IQ of 100. Look at what your parents have done in that light. They call you because they don't want to add to your brother's mental burden. They cannot count on him. Let me ask you OP, after your parent pass and the money goes to your brother, are you going to cut him out of your life?
I’d like to play devil’s advocate for the last story. Im gonna assume the sister probably has multiple miscarriages but was still there for her sister and her nephew. And now she sees OP not doing that and is taking it personally.
Oh so he thought bc you hadn't had any for awhile he could just come along and you would hop on pop. Well he should learn women with self worth are never that desperate
Last Story: …WHAT? “Hey if you had stayed this wouldn’t have happened” …no…it wouldn’t have happened if Op’s crappy sister hadnt said it… NTA Op thats awful:(
Story 1. Significantly younger kid treated much worse than older sibling, to the point of being forced into the military at 17. Expectation that parents own them nothing but they owe them everything. How much do you want to bet they are an affair baby thus why they so easily cut them from the will. OP has probably been treated poorly their whole life due to resentment for the affair .....
The brother isn’t dumb. He’s been allowed to skirt by and therefore never had to try. Reinforcing that behavior was the parent’s fault and so he got left behind. There is no such thing as a “dumb” person. You either have a disability or you were failed as a child and continued to practice incorrect behaviors that reinforce poor habits. I really wish this idea that people are legitimately incapable based on birth would stop.
@@mattwho81 I agree. That’s why I mentioned that there’s no such thing as a dumb person. Either it’s an intellectual disability or improper teaching methods that reinforced poor learning habits. Based on his IQ he definitely has a disability.
Story 1: Jesus Christ people, the brother isn’t “lazy” he has an IQ of 80 and needs help! ESH here except for the brother. Parents for obvious reasons and OP for diminishing the fact his brother has such a low IQ by saying “he’s not legally disabled”.
IMO OP was not disparaging her brother. She was trying to explain that in her country the brother is not considered disabled since his IQ is above the maximum level for him to be considered (get benefits) disabled. OP is not the AH and not part of the ESH. Her parents are fully and totally the AHs.
I think she is an oops baby or an affair baby her parents did not want her and she reminds them the one they wanted is not very bright. If they loved her she would get half or be the head of a family trust. Boomers being selfish and entitled 😮
@@benmeech4972 Considering the age gap between OP and brother, I don't think so. I think OP was the child they had to take care of their disabled brother and them in their old age. Happens all the time with families who have disabled children or children with chronic illnesses; some kids are even born for the explicit purpose of being spare parts for organ donation, like a future kidney or bone marrow transplant. She was never supposed to have a purpose outside of that. So that allows them to view her as entitled for expecting an inheritance and a villian for "abandoning them" when she doesn't want to fulfill her "obligation" of prioritizing their healthcare in old age. The independence thing is a front for the fact that they never really viewed OP as a their child - OP was their future employee and potentially her brother's caretaker. Nothing more.
Story 1 therapist here.. iq of 80 means mild intellectual disability. It IS a disability a mental disability. I realy don't understandstand the comments from people in that story. He ain't lazy, he just don't understand the things he needs to learn in school.
Do i agree with giving him everything definite NO. More wise is to give op everything let her handle the estate and pay something from the profits to her brother. Example if the rent the home out. They can split the money. That helps him more than this set up.
The brother can be helped with a full retaking of the IQ test, along with disability screenings/diagnosis, capability tests, the works. I had that done when I lost my old diagnosis papers and it helped me immensely to get the fresh look on what I both could and could not do.
That OP owes those parents exactly as much as OP was given. The legal minimum. Which in the case of an adult toward their parents means nothing.
Those parents can hire people who can manage their estate, manage their son's needs and their old-age assistance if they have such a healthy nest-egg. Let the Op enjoy a life of no pressure or obligation. That peace is priceless.
Bc OP clearly added this vital info in an edit. Just bc he can't get legal disability payement doesn't mean that having the iQ of a 12yo as an adult isn't 100% a disability.
Came here to say something similar. It seems like the parents did him a major disservice. The sibling does not have to care for him, but the lack of empathy.. wow
It kinda hurt to hear the brother apologize to be a bother when he has a low IQ. Parents are at fault here, brother seems just not smart.
And they have classes in school for those between the IQ of special needs and general education but it sounds like the parents didn’t enroll him or do anything to actually help him.
parents probably talked him down 'oh the teachers are just not good at their jobs' kind of talks. at least he tried something, how many stories have we heard of brothers who are functioning adults who sit at home al day playing video games and saying they expect the actual adult sibling to pay for their life once the parents are gone.
Thanks to being their 'special little boy' he hasn't failed to launch - they never let the plane leave the hanger from a young age and now he's miles behind everyone else.
Depends on where they live. Where I'm from there's no such thing @@lorilancaster5917
RE: Traditional
What OP described is NOT traditional, unless you have been in a Traditional Cult.
Traditional families consist of Men being faithful and supportive of their family. Not cheating consistently, and women Divorcing men who cheat, not cow towing to them
OP needs to dump Sarah and ignore any and all threats and sob stories.
The brother isn't lazy, he is actually in need of some help but it is for the parents to figure out what they will do for his care and their care. They ought to just hire a POA.
What's a POA?
@@DragonGoddess18 Power of attorney
No, the brother has a hard time keeping jobs. Tried to go to trade school and failed out. He definitely sounds lazy as fuck.
@@khendralibbey617 Oh,okay
And he actually sees the disparity hence why he apologized to OP. The parents are at fault and I’m glad OP updated that she’s cut contact with them.
Did any of those commenters hear the bit where the OP said her brother has an IQ of 80. He is not a smart man. Learning rote tasks is all he will ever be capable of. He will know this. I very much doubt he is "lazy" as such. OP NTA.
And depending on what age he was when they gave him the iq test it could've actually changed. They should get him retested and go from there. It's for sure not ops job too take care of him. Sounds life her parents are pretty well off.... maybe they should spend some of that money trying to get him better situated. As op suggested, maybe a trust to dole out money to the brother.
More importantly his disability or lack thereof has no bearing on whether OP has any obligation to lift a finger for their worthless asses.
That IQ comment was an edit, which may have come after some of the comments already posted.
They should have him fully diagnosed. A capability test, IQ test, disability diagnosis, everything. Like I had to take. It helped me immensely to have my limitations explained by people with degrees to the people who used to call me lazy.
Also it made WAY too much sense when it was all laid bare and still helps me to this day to know which things to avoid to not break myself and which things to keep doing despite the discomfort to not regress in the skills I've worked hard to obtain and polish.
a lot of my coworkers are like this, it's almost scary being one of the 'smarter ones' at the job site especially since we had a lot of relatives who believed I was a simpleton.
Story 2: Friend tried to pimp you out to a creep. No wait - that's not a friend.
All in the name of telling people she set them up. More like she set up OP to have a horrible experience that I cannot say
guy was probably bothering the friend and she hoped he would leave her alone if he got with op.
I hate that she’s scared to tell her family she dropped the evil “ friend” because they won’t support her decision. I mean - WTF
S3 (after the edit): Sarah is an abuser, and she was setting up OP with her creepy friend to get SA'd. Because Sarah has so thoroughly convinced everyone in her orbit besides OP that she's an angel (including OP's parents) and that OP is the bad guy, Sarah will only continue to escalate the situation until OP is actually harmed in some way. Since OP can't move out, she needs to start gathering proof of Sarah's lies and manipulation in order to protect herself. Considering Sarah is willing to commit self-harm to get her way, OP has even more reason to break away from Sarah! Op also has to realize that she's an adult now, and nobody's entitled to her friendship.
She needs to look up DARVO and grey rocking and cut those toxic influences from her life.
I have a friend with an IQ of 86, he's looking completely normal self-sufficient guy. Lives by himself, works, worked overseas. Absolutely nothing different with him. Dropped out of college for computer science, but it was boring for him, I would drop out too. I struggle to see how op's brother could be that much unable to support himself. Maybe parents didn't let him learn life skills.
That's actually impressive cuz chimps have an IQ of around 80
Story 2: OP has the upper hand against her friend in this story. OP's version is essentially protecting her virtue while her friend was willing to pimp her out pre-marriage. In the traditional family dynamic, this could work in OP's favor, but she'll need to get ahead of this. Inform her family why she's cutting contact with the friend before she does it so she doesn't get scapegoated after. Hopefully*.
*OP's family also sounds like they need very little excuse to be awful to her.
yea Sarah just knows that all she will ever be is a broodmare while op is creating a way out, scary thought here. she hoped he would attack her and get her pregnant or at least taint her so the parents would force her to marry and drop the college.
@@velvety2006 Yup, crab bucket mentality and Sarah is the head crab!
So 70-75 is the average to be considered disabled and the brother passed by 5-10 points 👀 If I lose half my foot but can still use my nub- Am I disabled or not? Walking would be VEERY difficult but I can still walk right? Ask yourself that
Simple thing is parents are crappy but the brother still needed help
But parents want to leave EVERYTHING to him and did SO MUCH MORE for the adult son than they did for their daughter from the time she was 17 years old. Bro needs help, but it doesn't need to be the sis. He can't handle his affairs, but they want to leave a $1,000,000+ estate to him with his sister hardly getting anything, not even as the estate manager, but being in charge of looking out for him! Just NO!
@deborahpinkey1264 question if you see someone bleed out on the street. You are going to treat them like the person standing there with a paper cut. Do call know what equitable means.
Is his name “ Forrest”?
Sounds like that first OP just needed to let those parents know she will put in as much effort as they have. Which appears to be the legal minimum. And the legal minimum a child owes their parents is... nothing.
Last story: Am I losing it? If OP's family missed her so much, why couldn't they come to see her. Obviously she was mainly trying to avoid talk of her loss and her sister's pregnancy, she didn't say she was against talking to her other family members otherwise. That they made such a big deal about her leaving is crazy. And why couldn't the hubby go back with the son? She was upset, yes, but they didn't have to stay away out of solidarity. Just weirdness all around IMO and not by OP.
As a man myself, I find the idea of "a man can do whatever he wants" really disgusting and disturbing.
Sister with the fertility issues needs to apologize; the rug sweeping is disgusting
Story 1: I'm glad OP feels a sense of relief from cutting ties. Good for her
Story one, the parents need to set up a trust with a lawyer. Putting the sister in charge of the brothers money will only ruin their relationship.
They should’ve done a lot of things but it sounds like they don’t want to use their resources resourcefully.
You want them to hand control to a complete stranger who has no love for their son? Good way to ensure he is homeless.
7:11 Ha! No.
OP is NTA. She chose to set a reasonable boundary and he CHOSE not to respect it. And "friend" cares more about being right than OP'S feelings and boundaries
And let’s not forget that he repeatedly did not respect OPs boundary and furthermore he grabbed her. I honestly think if OP stayed, he would’ve tried to drug her if available
@lorilancaster5917 Yeah, I wish that kinda thing didn't happen but unfortunately,it still does
OP got herself out of a dangerous situation
Everything should be left to Op so they can disperse it responsibly. He can’t handle that amount of money all on his own.
No, the parents need to set up any money they leave him to be in a trust. And the sister should not be in charge of it, because it will mess up any relationship they still have.
Exactly, what are they thinking?
@@jmarie9997 so give everything to the brother after giving OP nothing her entire life? That’s sounds fair. 😒
Plus if brother is able to get state or government assistance, they look at his income including inheritance which will likely make him over income
@@brookelynnwu8016Fair has nothing to do with it. They obviously have no intention to leave her anything. If they are determined to leave it all to the brother, they need to set it up so he won't spend it all.
An intellectual impairment doesn't mean they can't do things. Generally speaking people with an intellectual impairment of that range are amazing at finding adaptive strategies to find success on their terms.
Story 1 : Given the age differences, I'm guessing they had OP specifically to look after her older brother.
10:09 this OP needs to cut ties with Sarah.
Brother has more like a disadvantage than a disability in my opinion. But meh, its just words. On the other hand, he totally shouldn't recieve all the inheritance unless he proves he can manage it and not transferit to a nigerian prince.
Or an AI claiming to be Scarlet Johansen who is madly in love with him.
@lorilancaster5917 hahahaha can't rememeber where I heard that.
@@SergioBicerrathere was a woman who lost her life savings by giving it to a scammer who used AI to pass themselves as Keanu Reeves. I’ve heard another one where someone used Jennifer Aniston
That's not a guy just being a guy. Tell your 'friend' she is not a friend, she is literally ok with setting you up to be assaulted. Was her plan to have him take advantage of you or force himself on you?
What lies did she tell Jake about OP? That OP is 'open for anything'?
If Jake had 'harmed' OP in any way, the friend should also be charged with conspiracy to those crimes and being an accessory
Last story : if the roles were reversed everyone would be saying that she has a right to be happy & not ashamed of her pregnancy & that her sister can't just expect to never see her niece or any child ever.
It's so interesting when ppl also are biaised by taling the side of who tells the story
Story one - OP is the only daughter, are the parents expecting their daughter to look after them?
S2: To the unhinged matchmaker/shipper, there's nothing more important to the fantasy in their head.
Update; yeah, friend is the average shipper. Gotta love the 'Yeah i know my friend is toxic, but we've been friends since school...'.
It's not just shipping. Her friend lacks empathy; routinely threatens her with self-harm and suicide; and her friend is the golden child between both families, so if OP tries to cut her off, OP's parents will view her as the bad guy. She's in the orbit of an abuser, and financially can't leave it right now.
Miscarriage story .. went through the same thing only my ex was not empathetic, nor was his family because wouldn't want to upset pregnant sister in law . She was understanding when I didn't feel like staying in the hospital room with her and her new baby. ( I was there the month before recovering from the D&C. Her mum was also very understanding.
Why would you stay where you aren't respected? Your brother needs to get on husband mother and sister's case not yours. When you are nasty, guess what people do not want to be around you. You need to talk to your dad though. Keep your distance from the rest, they aren't people you need around you.
updated stories i love them keep them comimg.
Op needs to understand that the brother is reality very stupid.i it's not weaponized incompetence. He's truly incompetent. My brother is like him. It's not he won't do it. He can't understand how or what he's doing
The US military won't take anyone with an IQ under 83 because there no tasks that they can do. If your brother's IQ is 80, his issue isn't laziness. Imagine being in a math class with geniuses and not being able to understand what they are saying but being expected to succeed. No matter how hard you try you can't figure it out. Your brother is overwhelmed. He will forever be the person in the room who just doesn't understand. That is not his fault. He may not be disabled, but effectively he is closer to it than having the average IQ of 100.
Look at what your parents have done in that light. They call you because they don't want to add to your brother's mental burden. They cannot count on him.
Let me ask you OP, after your parent pass and the money goes to your brother, are you going to cut him out of your life?
True BUT ppl with a lower IQ than the brother still manage to get a job and live a good life!
So yes, I would still call him lazy!
Story 1: NTA and op don’t help your brother or the parents.
Story 2: NTA
Op has her bachelors, masters and PHD, but is about to get her masters degree.
Reddit has such vomit inducing language.
I’d like to play devil’s advocate for the last story. Im gonna assume the sister probably has multiple miscarriages but was still there for her sister and her nephew. And now she sees OP not doing that and is taking it personally.
Oh so he thought bc you hadn't had any for awhile he could just come along and you would hop on pop. Well he should learn women with self worth are never that desperate
Op in story story three just rug sweeps the fact that her sister also struggled with infertility and probably suffered losses to.
So I’m going ESH
Last Story: …WHAT?
“Hey if you had stayed this wouldn’t have happened”
…no…it wouldn’t have happened if Op’s crappy sister hadnt said it…
NTA Op thats awful:(
Story 1. Significantly younger kid treated much worse than older sibling, to the point of being forced into the military at 17. Expectation that parents own them nothing but they owe them everything. How much do you want to bet they are an affair baby thus why they so easily cut them from the will. OP has probably been treated poorly their whole life due to resentment for the affair .....
Or simply that OP was born a female?
Hi XO
The brother isn’t dumb. He’s been allowed to skirt by and therefore never had to try. Reinforcing that behavior was the parent’s fault and so he got left behind. There is no such thing as a “dumb” person. You either have a disability or you were failed as a child and continued to practice incorrect behaviors that reinforce poor habits. I really wish this idea that people are legitimately incapable based on birth would stop.
IQ of 80, that’s an undiagnosed learning disability. The parents have failed them both by not getting him the help he needed in childhood.
@@mattwho81 I agree. That’s why I mentioned that there’s no such thing as a dumb person. Either it’s an intellectual disability or improper teaching methods that reinforced poor learning habits. Based on his IQ he definitely has a disability.
Story 1: Jesus Christ people, the brother isn’t “lazy” he has an IQ of 80 and needs help! ESH here except for the brother. Parents for obvious reasons and OP for diminishing the fact his brother has such a low IQ by saying “he’s not legally disabled”.
IMO OP was not disparaging her brother. She was trying to explain that in her country the brother is not considered disabled since his IQ is above the maximum level for him to be considered (get benefits) disabled. OP is not the AH and not part of the ESH. Her parents are fully and totally the AHs.
I think she is an oops baby or an affair baby her parents did not want her and she reminds them the one they wanted is not very bright. If they loved her she would get half or be the head of a family trust. Boomers being selfish and entitled 😮
@@benmeech4972 Considering the age gap between OP and brother, I don't think so. I think OP was the child they had to take care of their disabled brother and them in their old age. Happens all the time with families who have disabled children or children with chronic illnesses; some kids are even born for the explicit purpose of being spare parts for organ donation, like a future kidney or bone marrow transplant.
She was never supposed to have a purpose outside of that. So that allows them to view her as entitled for expecting an inheritance and a villian for "abandoning them" when she doesn't want to fulfill her "obligation" of prioritizing their healthcare in old age. The independence thing is a front for the fact that they never really viewed OP as a their child - OP was their future employee and potentially her brother's caretaker. Nothing more.
Story 1 lol, why do ppl think they are entitled to their parents' money it is about the money, and it sad.
AH, the Incel troll 🧌 is back!
Where have you been? We missed you!