I have borderline OCD. It can be bad but I am not bothered by it all the time. Once took a 7 hour bath. I normally take an hour long bath. If I am doing well it is a half hour. A couple of times a year the OCD gets worse and it will take me 3 or 4 hours to take a bath. It is a vicious cycle because the longer it takes me to bathe the less often I want to bathe. The less often I bathe the longer I feel that I have to scrub myself. Unrelated to bathing, I get into obsessive thoughts like that I am lazy, or a racist or I don't deserve a pet. One of these thoughts keep going through my head. I tell myself that I don't want to think about it anymore but my brain keeps sending the thought. Watching TH-cam videos or reading can distract me from them but often when I stop the thoughts come back. OCD can be hell.
So while it's normal to occasionally have intrusive thoughts ODC focuses on these thoughts and blows them way out of proportion is what I think you are saying. Please correct me if I misunderstood. Thanks for the video.
Clomipramine saved my life. I've tried Citalopram and Fluvoxamine before and both would make me hypomanic, but somehow I got along with Clomipramine. My OCD before was terrible. There were times I couldn't concentrate on anything because of my obsessions/compulsions. Nowadays it's just a little devil that says mean things in the back of my mind. Don't get me wrong, I'm not free from OCD. I still obsess about whether or not I'm a pedophile all the effing time. But at least it doesn't make my life hell. Thank you for the video, it's very educational! 😊
I can definitely relate to this video. At 8 I was diagnosed with OCD and at 22 with schizoaffective disorder bipolar type. Definitely feel it was a precursor. I struggle with OCD still and the hypervigilance I experience is excruciating.
Clomipramine has helped me as much as Zyprexa has helped you. I've had OCD since age 3-4, became severe at age 11 1/2. Finally found clomipramine my senior year of college. Love your channel and hearing your story. Mental health education and destigmatization are so important.
My OCD started out physical, switching lights on and off, getting up out of a chair over and over. But I grew up in a crowded terraced house, and my stepdad,unot knowing how to deal with it, made a joke out of it, which was even more embarrassing, so I internalised, put it away where it couldn't be seen. I sorted words I was reading into sets of particular 'favourable' numbers, I tracked the points on objects with my eyes, counting them until they fit the right numbers. And the numbers would change, the 'right' numbers would alter depending on circumstance. All this was so I wouldn't be responsible for 'bad things happening'. When, in my early thirties my late Wife noticed I was lokkng over her shoulder during an argument (to track cracks on the wall), she finally got me to talk about what everyone else inlmy life had stepped around or ignored or never noticed. She did some research, and with her help, with my trust in her, and the knowledge of how OCD worked, and some simple behavioural techniques, I got my OCD under control within a year. I couldn't beleive I was free, I had never thought it possible. I had lived in a cage of numbers and routines, and somebody had finally cared enough to notice and help me out. I had been like a computer with a virus, running endless pointless tasks, slowing me down. These days I have so many hobbies, art, programming, 3D printing and design, so much capacity, I've even started to befreind numbers, my hated jailers, and learn some maths, all because she noticed, and asked me what was wrong. Thankfully it wasn't a debt I couldn't repay, but I'll never stop being grateful.
Thank you for this clear and understandable explanation of OCD! Videos like this are really important when there are so many misconceptions about OCD floating around (and so many people saying things like "I'm so OCD" when they just mean they're highly organized). I think the biggest thing I learned was that you can be diagnosed with either obsessions or compulsions on their own-I always assumed you had to have both to be diagnosed. It also makes a lot of sense why it's so hard to get diagnosed in the first place, when it's so hard to talk about really messed up intrusive thoughts with another person and worry about facing judgment in order to get help. I also appreciate you sharing about how OCD affects your life. What it did to your eating patterns sounds especially rough. I'm glad that medication and therapy have been helpful and that your OCD is well managed now. Thank you again for making such an informative video!
Thanks for the comment GC! OCD is so much more than just being organized and it wasn’t until I started researching it that I truly started to understand what was up with my brain. Stay awesome!
Exposure Response-Prevention in a nutshell (from over a year in the program)-- get your anxiety as high as you possibly can, and hold it there. I did it two hours, every-other day, plus homework. It's deeply unpleasant, but I'm able to mostly maintain through the OCD. Highly recommend.
In 2022 I owned 3 brand new cars within 4 days during a manic episode that actually led me to the psych ward I'm now 2 years later and open to trying medication again after getting out of the psych ward last week. I'm trying to do my best but it's hard when I'm so unmotivated to do anything even things that I like to do. The cars were a Nissan NV200, a Nissan Juke, and a Toyota Prius. I ended up losing about 7000$ through the trades in 4 days. Really messed me up I wasn't thinking straight at all and the Nissan dealership definitely took advantage of me seeing my struggle
@@allie54774 Because only in usa so many people have a bunch of psychological diseases in the same time, and nowhere else in the world, and do you wonder why? Country where parents take their children to the doctor at the slightest strange sign, a doctor who of course determines that some of the disorders ARE in question... and only to inject as many drugs as possible because the pharmacomafia rules the health care system, which is the worst and most expensive in the world there.. I am absolutely sure that in fact, you don't even have 60% of what you stated, that's why. Be well, wake up
@@allie54774TH-cam keeps deleting my answer, anyway.. Because you live in the only country (I'm assuming usa) where so many people have a bunch of disorders in the same time, where parents take their children to the doctor at the slightest strange sign in behavior, a doctor who of course determines that some of the disorders are in question..only to inject as many drugs as possible because the fa Rm ako mo b rules the health care system, which is the worst and most expensive in the world.. I am absolutely sure that in fact, you don't even have 60% of what you stated, that's why. Be well, wake up
@CarpeDiem23 lol incorrect. I live in the UK, and suffered my whole entire life until the past 5 years (I'm now 35) undiagnosed with these disorders. Suffered very significantly. Its taken the past 15 years in and out of mental health services where the puzzle pieces have all fit together. The only medications I take are an ssri, low dose of blood pressure medication and over the counter allergy pills and vitamins. I'm in group psychotherapy now & have been for the past 3 years. Nice job on making a bunch of assumptions about me though!
Schitzotypal with OCD and ADD, here. OCD is probably the worst of the lot. There's a reason I insist my therapists and shrinks take vague notes if I'm going to speak openly about my obsessions. There's no such thing as "mild OCD". It's a disorder, if it isn't fucking up your day-to-day life, it ain't a disorder. My OCD expresses in such a way that I thought originally that it was "pure O" OCD because my compulsions where mostly internal. My siblings in madness, ruminating and thought monitoring are compulsions. Pure O ain't a thing.
I'm not sure if this is either compulsion or obsessive. But I can NOT stand blankets on the floor especially MY blankets! People whistling, smacking food, popping fingers or any other body part, rubbing hands together, hearing the shriek of the guitar strings when someone is playing it. Absolutely full nightmare! People chewing loudly, smears on mirrors or glass. I'm a perfectionist, that is a bipolar trait I believe. People (hubby or my grown kids) using my brush, omg that is one that will launch me into mars lol. I always wash my brush before and after I wash my hair. I don't like when my personal items, of anything I own, gets moved. It drives me nuts! So. There's me in a nutshell. I'm sure there's more, but I can't think of anything else at this point. * I detest anyone mopping my floor except me, I will give them the look of hell fire shooting out my eyeballs if they even attempt it. touching anything sticky on my hands, I can't do the sticky hand thing. Being a mom, that was fun! Kids are sticky thing connoisseur that sucked! lol
I'm highly obsessive, but mostly in regards to social interactions. I'm pretty sure it's not OCD, I just have had a history of really bad social anxiety I'm gradually getting over. The intrusive thoughts are really intense, and at times they occur every few seconds. I just have this movie theater in my head that loves all my awkward experiences, from slightly inconveniencing people to more heated arguments. I also don't really have romantic feelings for anyone unless I'm REALLY into them, and then they're all I can think about, even years later. I have certain compulsions, but they don't feel that harmful. For instance, I am constantly taking screenshots for seemingly no reason. I do this more if I'm feeling really anxious for some reason. I can almost measure how bad my anxiety was on a certain day by how many screenshots I have, lol. Another compulsion I have is eating from clean dishes - I just really don't trust anyone else to wash the dishes I eat from, even if I directly saw them clean them. My ritual around this involves rinsing it out with water and wiping it out, even though I know that doesn't do anything about the germs by itself. I sometimes also use dish soap (or it's mandatory if someone else didn't plausibly clean it). It's for this reason I usually prefer to be the one who cleans the dishes in my house. Another more minor compulsion I have is that I just _have to_ take a shower before I go anywhere, which usually annoys whoever I'm going with and I always say "I *know* you don't care, I *know* you think I look fine, I just have to, give me a minute". So, I mean, I guess OCD fits, but it's extremely tame in my case compared to my general anxiety especially around social situations. Also, my family and one (1) friend would never really guess I have OCD because my room is constantly a mess. "For a germophobe you sure have a messy room" my mom would always say. I also have a history of depression (I think it may actually be bipolar II but I'll have to speak with a professional about it) so letting myself go during those periods is pretty expected from me.
I'm not sure how this relates exactly, but I do know that there's this girl I used to work with that I felt this way about, and I keep on wanting to see her one last time to say goodbye before I leave the state for good. But every time I drive up there, I freak out and basically make a u-turn. There was one time I had to pick up a package from there. I saw her and immediately my fight or flight kicked in and I was on a mission to get out of there. The cashier was trying to talk to me but I couldn't really formulate any good responses, I must've looked so suspicious lol. Ahh, fear - you and I go way back. I may die alone but at least I have you. I'm gonna miss her, all I have to do is walk in one last time and say bye but due to my stupid ass brain I just can't. I hope I don't seem like some kind of creep, I genuinely just admire her so deeply and I sincerely hope she has a good life, god knows she deserves it.
Also, I have to hunt for bugs every time I come back home. In all fairness though I have seen spiders and centipedes here and have pretty bad insectophobia. The phobia is (by definition) irrational, but the compulsion is not. Additionally, I'm not sure if this counts, but I'm constantly rewriting messages dozens of times before sending them. Also, I just love this, like... why watch a horror movie when I can just clean out my closet lmao. Same idea. Like, I know there's no real danger, and yet it gives me the same kind of adrenaline that you'd get during a jumpscare lol.
You know, I never realized this, but I think saying "sorry" or "I'm gonna kill myself" (quietly, to myself) every time I remember something embarrassing probably qualifies as a compulsion. (Sorry for the barrage of comments, I just have a lot of time on my hands today and I've been thinking about this stuff, lol.) Psychoanalysis is an endless rabbit hole for me, I hardly understand why I am the way I am. Also "I'm gonna kill myself" gradually turned into "I'm gonna cut myself in the eye with a butterknife" I guess because in the past few years I've been making attempts to go easier on myself lol. Why the eye? Why the butterknife? Who knows! Who cares lol.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It is very helpful. I like some of your explanations as well. People could use more practical associations to help figure out things for themselves.
I have never been diagnosed with ocd but I have struggled with intrusive thoughts in the past. Sometimes I think I did something horrible and don't remember it and now everyone is looking at me like I'm a monster but they are afraid of talking about it in front of me for some reason. The thought comes to me and I tell myself "no way that happened" but then it's like another part of my brain does believe it and repeats the "what ifs" over and over. And that's only one of the ways my mind betrays me on a daily basis. It's weird because on the outside I just seem to be a quiet and relaxed person but my mental space is a disaster
I always tell people that they wouldn’t last ten minutes in my brain between the voices, racing thoughts/depressive thoughts, my monologue, and my intrusive thoughts. It’s a mess.
For me, it's not neat, it's not organized, it's like losing my soul when I can find something or dieing when someone forces me to do something that I know is incorrect, losing my mind when a group forces a scenario they don't understand.
nice video thanks for making this. I have clinical ocd was diagnosed as a kid and still in treatment. Genuine question for you how do you tell the difference between loud ass intrusive thoughts and AVHs? Curious how and if you make a differentiation. Thanks and thanks for raising awareness for this . i cant tell you how much it annoys me when ppl say "im so ocd" like ... bruh ...
One of my friends always checks several times if the door is locked despite the fact she just locked it with her key like a second ago. And after she did all the checking and left, sometimes she even comes back home just to check it again, even if she left 20 minutes ago. We discussed that and haven't noticed other OCD related behaviour, and probably she doesn't have an OCD, but it still looks excessive and sometimes funny (she's the first to laugh). I have intrusive thoughts and sometimes irrational way of choosing clothes or paths, but my doc told me it's just a typical bipolar thing (in my case, I mean) and I was never prescribed with any meds to manage this specific symptom. A therapy was suggested, but I am so resistant to any type of a psychological therapy that it's just a waste of time (my mind sees it as a way to manipulate, control and change who I am). For the last decade there was not a single therapist who could get through my resistance. All my sessions always turned into a conversation about people's behavior patterns, history, psychiatry or philosophy, or even an argument why I think the therapist is wrong about something.
Would you ever be open to making a video explaining or giving advice on how you stopped self harming? Totally ok if you are not comfortable just thought I'd ask. ❤
This is the closest I have: From Hurt to Healing: The Three Reasons I Quit Cutting th-cam.com/video/VqywDKZVgx0/w-d-xo.html I won’t be making more because the community guidelines surrounding the issue are too much to tiptoe, and monetization is basically impossible (that video is not monetized) Hope this helps enough tho! The piggies are super cute in it :)
i have, from time to time, considered that i might be a bit ocd. but in self evaluation, i know it's really just part of my paranoia. if i am distracted or simply on autopilot, i will do things without applying enough thought to remember. so i would drive thru town, the get a bit obsessed about whether i stopped at the red lights. or i might push the lock button on the car remote 3 or 4 times to make sure it is locked. but the reality is that it's my paranoia about the red lights because i do not directly remember stopping at any. or it's my paranoia about the functioning of the car remote and my need to hit it a few times to make sure the button press registered.
Thank you. I mentioned the idea of kissing my best friend, the idea that I forgot to switch off the stove turning the house down on fire, the idea that someone followed me and judged me everytime, that people could have listen to my thought and much more . I have adhd with Schizoaffective disorder. Do you have any Pica history ?
two years ago I had been studying so hard at the age of 26 and all of a sudden a devastating palpitation that lasted four months and restlessness and then after the palpitation disappeared I have got vicious ocd and then depression and headache, we don't have a health system in Iraq so the physicians were only for one year prescribing me medications with zero benefits and no one told me to change my bad lifestyle, I'm gonna change my lifestyle and I know no one in the world know if I'm gonna get rid of the ocd and depression or they gonna stick with me for good
Hello, can I ask you? Where do you see the main difference between strong OCD obsession and psychotic delusion that you are aware of? Because last year I had my very intensive psychopatological episode stemming from my new and one of the first partner relationship in my life. The beginning of the episode was OCD based and I have never had anything psychotic, but from the experiences of other people I can see that my obsessions were very delusion-coded. I experience it as if there were two distinct opinions in my head at the same time and this tends to be so strong I even personified the OCD. For example last year I had the obsession (one of many) when my OCD thought that my mom killed my queerplatonic partner and served his meat as a lunch to me instead of a turkey. At that moment I rationally knew that it's not true, but it's like a part of my brain just belives it fully at the moment. It's like an endless fight with a hypnotist in your head that is giving you bizzare suggestions. Also I experienced a lot of aphophenia and sometimes it was a bit referential delusions and paranoia coded as well. So sometimes I thought about what exactly makes my experiences different from someone with delusions that is aware of them.
I guess I'm lucky I only triple check, or more, if I took my meds when I go on a long trip. I also wash my hands every time I was outside, at least for like 20 seconds, I don't know if this is ocd or just legit bacteria eradication. But yeah, I don't know if that qualifies me for ocd. Thanks as always for nice and informative video Kit.
@@Catlily5 I might have not made myself clear, when I said outside I meant whenever I go outside my house for some chore or drive a car, basically when there's lots of touching potentially unclean objects, and I don't do that a lot so my skin is fine.
I would suggest someone with ocd to place nanny cams that they can access from their phone in key areas of the house. 1 facing the oven for example. then they can check their phone througout the day to ease anxiety.
That would not help. Hard to explain but with OCD “checking” is what needs to be avoided. Having cameras would make someone with OCD more likely to check and check and check when they aren’t home, so this is the opposite of what someone with OCD needs because they need to stop checking thing. Hope this explains some things!
I have an appointment with my psychiatrist this week about switching meds and my ocd is really flaring up. I had a hospital visit a couple years ago from switching meds and do not feel safe switching meds without being in the hospital but also cannot afford to miss work. The medication is lamictal which you said you're on and I have just seen some pretty scary videos about its side effects which I know will happen with any medication I look up incldung seroquel xr which I am on right now and have been for a couple years. Just feel really lost and hopeless right now and I am really scared. My diagnosis is major depressive, generalized anxiety and ocd.
Just really need someone that understands because the littlest things take over my life and I feel so much shame for having nothing left to give when I only work 30 hours a week and do nothing besides that :( I just want the constant torment to end
The worst type of osd is when it's a situation and you have to react in a particular way.i had a allergec reaction to lamicdal stivan Johnson syndrome it was really bad
I'm schizo too and have OCD I won't mention I actually wrote a book along those lines but great example the kissing one I never had that one unless I came across certain people 🙂 laughter is the best medicine aye kit kat ha
when you've been through the system and mi rigamarole long enough, you learn that diagnoses are only helpful in the very beginning, to name the demon. eventually, it becomes simply a matter of which meds work and if you can tolerate the side effects-and this will give you insight into how useless diagnoses are at the end of the day.
Medication is based on diagnosis. When I was misdiagnosed I didn't get the right medication and it was hell. So I would say that a diagnosis is definitely important if you are being medicated (and even if you aren't being medicated for non-medicine treatment options).
The intrusive thoughts at some point almost put your body on "autopilot" if that makes any sense. That's how I experience OCD.
Yes! I feel this way sometimes as well
@@SchizoKitzo If you've ever watched the anime Soul Eater, Death the Kid is basically how I have OCD, albeit not as dramatic, but yeah lol
I have borderline OCD. It can be bad but I am not bothered by it all the time.
Once took a 7 hour bath. I normally take an hour long bath. If I am doing well it is a half hour. A couple of times a year the OCD gets worse and it will take me 3 or 4 hours to take a bath. It is a vicious cycle because the longer it takes me to bathe the less often I want to bathe. The less often I bathe the longer I feel that I have to scrub myself.
Unrelated to bathing, I get into obsessive thoughts like that I am lazy, or a racist or I don't deserve a pet. One of these thoughts keep going through my head. I tell myself that I don't want to think about it anymore but my brain keeps sending the thought.
Watching TH-cam videos or reading can distract me from them but often when I stop the thoughts come back. OCD can be hell.
OCD is horrible and I hate that you suffer with it as well. And it’s always wild to me how differently it presents in others so thank you for sharing!
@@SchizoKitzo Thanks for the video.
So while it's normal to occasionally have intrusive thoughts ODC focuses on these thoughts and blows them way out of proportion is what I think you are saying. Please correct me if I misunderstood. Thanks for the video.
You got it right! Exactly
Clomipramine saved my life. I've tried Citalopram and Fluvoxamine before and both would make me hypomanic, but somehow I got along with Clomipramine. My OCD before was terrible. There were times I couldn't concentrate on anything because of my obsessions/compulsions. Nowadays it's just a little devil that says mean things in the back of my mind. Don't get me wrong, I'm not free from OCD. I still obsess about whether or not I'm a pedophile all the effing time. But at least it doesn't make my life hell. Thank you for the video, it's very educational! 😊
I can definitely relate to this video. At 8 I was diagnosed with OCD and at 22 with schizoaffective disorder bipolar type. Definitely feel it was a precursor. I struggle with OCD still and the hypervigilance I experience is excruciating.
I do wonder if there’s a more serious relationship between the two given how common the two are together
@@SchizoKitzo I do as well. My psychiatrist says it is being looked in to in more detail. We'll see...
Clomipramine has helped me as much as Zyprexa has helped you. I've had OCD since age 3-4, became severe at age 11 1/2. Finally found clomipramine my senior year of college. Love your channel and hearing your story. Mental health education and destigmatization are so important.
So glad you found meds that worked for you!
I read about ERP a while ago and the thought of it it's somehow terrifying for me. I guess that's the point lol
It was scary for me too but it helped so so much
The edits around the DSM bring me such joy everytime! I definitely feel like I have a better understanding of OCD now
Operhs grad level book club has frequently covered the DSM widely.
Awesome! Glad to hear it!
My OCD started out physical, switching lights on and off, getting up out of a chair over and over.
But I grew up in a crowded terraced house, and my stepdad,unot knowing how to deal with it, made a joke out of it, which was even more embarrassing, so I internalised, put it away where it couldn't be seen.
I sorted words I was reading into sets of particular 'favourable' numbers, I tracked the points on objects with my eyes, counting them until they fit the right numbers.
And the numbers would change, the 'right' numbers would alter depending on circumstance.
All this was so I wouldn't be responsible for 'bad things happening'.
When, in my early thirties my late Wife noticed I was lokkng over her shoulder during an argument (to track cracks on the wall), she finally got me to talk about what everyone else inlmy life had stepped around or ignored or never noticed.
She did some research, and with her help, with my trust in her, and the knowledge of how OCD worked, and some simple behavioural techniques, I got my OCD under control within a year.
I couldn't beleive I was free, I had never thought it possible.
I had lived in a cage of numbers and routines, and somebody had finally cared enough to notice and help me out.
I had been like a computer with a virus, running endless pointless tasks, slowing me down.
These days I have so many hobbies, art, programming, 3D printing and design, so much capacity, I've even started to befreind numbers, my hated jailers, and learn some maths, all because she noticed, and asked me what was wrong.
Thankfully it wasn't a debt I couldn't repay, but I'll never stop being grateful.
Thank you for this clear and understandable explanation of OCD! Videos like this are really important when there are so many misconceptions about OCD floating around (and so many people saying things like "I'm so OCD" when they just mean they're highly organized).
I think the biggest thing I learned was that you can be diagnosed with either obsessions or compulsions on their own-I always assumed you had to have both to be diagnosed. It also makes a lot of sense why it's so hard to get diagnosed in the first place, when it's so hard to talk about really messed up intrusive thoughts with another person and worry about facing judgment in order to get help.
I also appreciate you sharing about how OCD affects your life. What it did to your eating patterns sounds especially rough. I'm glad that medication and therapy have been helpful and that your OCD is well managed now. Thank you again for making such an informative video!
Thanks for the comment GC! OCD is so much more than just being organized and it wasn’t until I started researching it that I truly started to understand what was up with my brain. Stay awesome!
Exposure Response-Prevention in a nutshell (from over a year in the program)-- get your anxiety as high as you possibly can, and hold it there. I did it two hours, every-other day, plus homework. It's deeply unpleasant, but I'm able to mostly maintain through the OCD. Highly recommend.
Yup I recommend it too!!! Saved so many aspects of my life even if it sucks while it’s happening.
I am diagnosed with OCD, Depression, and ADHD.
It’s interesting the way dual diagnosis work and how common different ones are.
Very good video Kit! I suffer from OCD since I was 10. Thank You for this video ❤
In 2022 I owned 3 brand new cars within 4 days during a manic episode that actually led me to the psych ward I'm now 2 years later and open to trying medication again after getting out of the psych ward last week. I'm trying to do my best but it's hard when I'm so unmotivated to do anything even things that I like to do. The cars were a Nissan NV200, a Nissan Juke, and a Toyota Prius. I ended up losing about 7000$ through the trades in 4 days. Really messed me up I wasn't thinking straight at all and the Nissan dealership definitely took advantage of me seeing my struggle
Thank you so much Kit. I also suffer from OCD along with bpd and osdd and this helps me understand the ocd a lot more ❤️
Glad to have helped!
I have it alongside cptsd, bpd, osdd, autism and adhd. It definitely ties in to those other conditions in my case.
I think you should change your doctor, or even better country..
@@CarpeDiem23 why?
@@allie54774 Because only in usa so many people have a bunch of psychological diseases in the same time, and nowhere else in the world, and do you wonder why? Country where parents take their children to the doctor at the slightest strange sign, a doctor who of course determines that some of the disorders ARE in question... and only to inject as many drugs as possible because the pharmacomafia rules the health care system, which is the worst and most expensive in the world there.. I am absolutely sure that in fact, you don't even have 60% of what you stated, that's why. Be well, wake up
@@allie54774TH-cam keeps deleting my answer, anyway.. Because you live in the only country (I'm assuming usa) where so many people have a bunch of disorders in the same time, where parents take their children to the doctor at the slightest strange sign in behavior, a doctor who of course determines that some of the disorders are in question..only to inject as many drugs as possible because the fa Rm ako mo b rules the health care system, which is the worst and most expensive in the world.. I am absolutely sure that in fact, you don't even have 60% of what you stated, that's why. Be well, wake up
@CarpeDiem23 lol incorrect. I live in the UK, and suffered my whole entire life until the past 5 years (I'm now 35) undiagnosed with these disorders. Suffered very significantly. Its taken the past 15 years in and out of mental health services where the puzzle pieces have all fit together. The only medications I take are an ssri, low dose of blood pressure medication and over the counter allergy pills and vitamins. I'm in group psychotherapy now & have been for the past 3 years. Nice job on making a bunch of assumptions about me though!
Schitzotypal with OCD and ADD, here. OCD is probably the worst of the lot. There's a reason I insist my therapists and shrinks take vague notes if I'm going to speak openly about my obsessions. There's no such thing as "mild OCD". It's a disorder, if it isn't fucking up your day-to-day life, it ain't a disorder.
My OCD expresses in such a way that I thought originally that it was "pure O" OCD because my compulsions where mostly internal. My siblings in madness, ruminating and thought monitoring are compulsions. Pure O ain't a thing.
I am also diagnosed Schizoaffective bipolar type and OCD. I find OCD worse than Schizoaffective sometimes.
I'm not sure if this is either compulsion or obsessive. But I can NOT stand blankets on the floor especially MY blankets! People whistling, smacking food, popping fingers or any other body part, rubbing hands together, hearing the shriek of the guitar strings when someone is playing it. Absolutely full nightmare! People chewing loudly, smears on mirrors or glass. I'm a perfectionist, that is a bipolar trait I believe. People (hubby or my grown kids) using my brush, omg that is one that will launch me into mars lol. I always wash my brush before and after I wash my hair. I don't like when my personal items, of anything I own, gets moved. It drives me nuts! So. There's me in a nutshell. I'm sure there's more, but I can't think of anything else at this point.
* I detest anyone mopping my floor except me, I will give them the look of hell fire shooting out my eyeballs if they even attempt it.
touching anything sticky on my hands, I can't do the sticky hand thing. Being a mom, that was fun! Kids are sticky thing connoisseur
that sucked! lol
ohhh cd yes its not fun. Thank's a lot for sharing your life with this comorbidity. very entertaining and informative.
An example of a compulsion would be NEEDING to slap a book twice every time you reference it lol
I'm highly obsessive, but mostly in regards to social interactions. I'm pretty sure it's not OCD, I just have had a history of really bad social anxiety I'm gradually getting over. The intrusive thoughts are really intense, and at times they occur every few seconds. I just have this movie theater in my head that loves all my awkward experiences, from slightly inconveniencing people to more heated arguments. I also don't really have romantic feelings for anyone unless I'm REALLY into them, and then they're all I can think about, even years later.
I have certain compulsions, but they don't feel that harmful. For instance, I am constantly taking screenshots for seemingly no reason. I do this more if I'm feeling really anxious for some reason. I can almost measure how bad my anxiety was on a certain day by how many screenshots I have, lol. Another compulsion I have is eating from clean dishes - I just really don't trust anyone else to wash the dishes I eat from, even if I directly saw them clean them. My ritual around this involves rinsing it out with water and wiping it out, even though I know that doesn't do anything about the germs by itself. I sometimes also use dish soap (or it's mandatory if someone else didn't plausibly clean it). It's for this reason I usually prefer to be the one who cleans the dishes in my house. Another more minor compulsion I have is that I just _have to_ take a shower before I go anywhere, which usually annoys whoever I'm going with and I always say "I *know* you don't care, I *know* you think I look fine, I just have to, give me a minute".
So, I mean, I guess OCD fits, but it's extremely tame in my case compared to my general anxiety especially around social situations. Also, my family and one (1) friend would never really guess I have OCD because my room is constantly a mess. "For a germophobe you sure have a messy room" my mom would always say. I also have a history of depression (I think it may actually be bipolar II but I'll have to speak with a professional about it) so letting myself go during those periods is pretty expected from me.
I'm not sure how this relates exactly, but I do know that there's this girl I used to work with that I felt this way about, and I keep on wanting to see her one last time to say goodbye before I leave the state for good. But every time I drive up there, I freak out and basically make a u-turn. There was one time I had to pick up a package from there. I saw her and immediately my fight or flight kicked in and I was on a mission to get out of there. The cashier was trying to talk to me but I couldn't really formulate any good responses, I must've looked so suspicious lol. Ahh, fear - you and I go way back. I may die alone but at least I have you. I'm gonna miss her, all I have to do is walk in one last time and say bye but due to my stupid ass brain I just can't. I hope I don't seem like some kind of creep, I genuinely just admire her so deeply and I sincerely hope she has a good life, god knows she deserves it.
Also, I have to hunt for bugs every time I come back home. In all fairness though I have seen spiders and centipedes here and have pretty bad insectophobia. The phobia is (by definition) irrational, but the compulsion is not. Additionally, I'm not sure if this counts, but I'm constantly rewriting messages dozens of times before sending them. Also, I just love this, like... why watch a horror movie when I can just clean out my closet lmao. Same idea. Like, I know there's no real danger, and yet it gives me the same kind of adrenaline that you'd get during a jumpscare lol.
You know, I never realized this, but I think saying "sorry" or "I'm gonna kill myself" (quietly, to myself) every time I remember something embarrassing probably qualifies as a compulsion. (Sorry for the barrage of comments, I just have a lot of time on my hands today and I've been thinking about this stuff, lol.) Psychoanalysis is an endless rabbit hole for me, I hardly understand why I am the way I am.
Also "I'm gonna kill myself" gradually turned into "I'm gonna cut myself in the eye with a butterknife" I guess because in the past few years I've been making attempts to go easier on myself lol. Why the eye? Why the butterknife? Who knows! Who cares lol.
Thank you for sharing your experience. It is very helpful. I like some of your explanations as well. People could use more practical associations to help figure out things for themselves.
Glad I could help! I worked hard on those explanations so thanks!
I have never been diagnosed with ocd but I have struggled with intrusive thoughts in the past. Sometimes I think I did something horrible and don't remember it and now everyone is looking at me like I'm a monster but they are afraid of talking about it in front of me for some reason. The thought comes to me and I tell myself "no way that happened" but then it's like another part of my brain does believe it and repeats the "what ifs" over and over. And that's only one of the ways my mind betrays me on a daily basis. It's weird because on the outside I just seem to be a quiet and relaxed person but my mental space is a disaster
I always tell people that they wouldn’t last ten minutes in my brain between the voices, racing thoughts/depressive thoughts, my monologue, and my intrusive thoughts. It’s a mess.
For me, it's not neat, it's not organized, it's like losing my soul when I can find something or dieing when someone forces me to do something that I know is incorrect, losing my mind when a group forces a scenario they don't understand.
Or, it's a simulation, "whatever that means to 'you'"
This is definitely my experience with OCD
nice video thanks for making this. I have clinical ocd was diagnosed as a kid and still in treatment. Genuine question for you how do you tell the difference between loud ass intrusive thoughts and AVHs? Curious how and if you make a differentiation. Thanks and thanks for raising awareness for this . i cant tell you how much it annoys me when ppl say "im so ocd" like ... bruh ...
All I can say to answer that question is to stay tuned! You’re not the only one to ask it and I do listen to my audience 👀
Glad you liked the video!
One of my friends always checks several times if the door is locked despite the fact she just locked it with her key like a second ago. And after she did all the checking and left, sometimes she even comes back home just to check it again, even if she left 20 minutes ago. We discussed that and haven't noticed other OCD related behaviour, and probably she doesn't have an OCD, but it still looks excessive and sometimes funny (she's the first to laugh). I have intrusive thoughts and sometimes irrational way of choosing clothes or paths, but my doc told me it's just a typical bipolar thing (in my case, I mean) and I was never prescribed with any meds to manage this specific symptom. A therapy was suggested, but I am so resistant to any type of a psychological therapy that it's just a waste of time (my mind sees it as a way to manipulate, control and change who I am). For the last decade there was not a single therapist who could get through my resistance. All my sessions always turned into a conversation about people's behavior patterns, history, psychiatry or philosophy, or even an argument why I think the therapist is wrong about something.
Would you ever be open to making a video explaining or giving advice on how you stopped self harming? Totally ok if you are not comfortable just thought I'd ask. ❤
This is the closest I have:
From Hurt to Healing: The Three Reasons I Quit Cutting
th-cam.com/video/VqywDKZVgx0/w-d-xo.html
I won’t be making more because the community guidelines surrounding the issue are too much to tiptoe, and monetization is basically impossible (that video is not monetized) Hope this helps enough tho! The piggies are super cute in it :)
i have, from time to time, considered that i might be a bit ocd. but in self evaluation, i know it's really just part of my paranoia. if i am distracted or simply on autopilot, i will do things without applying enough thought to remember. so i would drive thru town, the get a bit obsessed about whether i stopped at the red lights. or i might push the lock button on the car remote 3 or 4 times to make sure it is locked. but the reality is that it's my paranoia about the red lights because i do not directly remember stopping at any. or it's my paranoia about the functioning of the car remote and my need to hit it a few times to make sure the button press registered.
Thank you. I mentioned the idea of kissing my best friend, the idea that I forgot to switch off the stove turning the house down on fire, the idea that someone followed me and judged me everytime, that people could have listen to my thought and much more . I have adhd with Schizoaffective disorder. Do you have any Pica history ?
two years ago I had been studying so hard at the age of 26 and all of a sudden a devastating palpitation that lasted four months and restlessness and then after the palpitation disappeared I have got vicious ocd and then depression and headache, we don't have a health system in Iraq so the physicians were only for one year prescribing me medications with zero benefits and no one told me to change my bad lifestyle, I'm gonna change my lifestyle and I know no one in the world know if I'm gonna get rid of the ocd and depression or they gonna stick with me for good
If it were easier I'd unplug the oven after using it. I'd still wake up after sleeping 20 minutes and go check lol ugh
Good video!😁
Why you don't take Sertraline? I would really appreciate an answer to this question. Thank you so much for all your content, it's so helpful!!!!
Honestly, it’s because my doctor hasn’t told me to. Simple as that. Glad I can make content you find helpful!
Hello, can I ask you? Where do you see the main difference between strong OCD obsession and psychotic delusion that you are aware of?
Because last year I had my very intensive psychopatological episode stemming from my new and one of the first partner relationship in my life. The beginning of the episode was OCD based and I have never had anything psychotic, but from the experiences of other people I can see that my obsessions were very delusion-coded.
I experience it as if there were two distinct opinions in my head at the same time and this tends to be so strong I even personified the OCD. For example last year I had the obsession (one of many) when my OCD thought that my mom killed my queerplatonic partner and served his meat as a lunch to me instead of a turkey. At that moment I rationally knew that it's not true, but it's like a part of my brain just belives it fully at the moment. It's like an endless fight with a hypnotist in your head that is giving you bizzare suggestions. Also I experienced a lot of aphophenia and sometimes it was a bit referential delusions and paranoia coded as well.
So sometimes I thought about what exactly makes my experiences different from someone with delusions that is aware of them.
I guess I'm lucky I only triple check, or more, if I took my meds when I go on a long trip. I also wash my hands every time I was outside, at least for like 20 seconds, I don't know if this is ocd or just legit bacteria eradication. But yeah, I don't know if that qualifies me for ocd. Thanks as always for nice and informative video Kit.
Thanks for the nice comment Kinzhe!
Are your hands raw from washing them so much?
@@Catlily5 I might have not made myself clear, when I said outside I meant whenever I go outside my house for some chore or drive a car, basically when there's lots of touching potentially unclean objects, and I don't do that a lot so my skin is fine.
@@kinzhe83 Oh, ok. I walk outside a lot just to check what is going on and walk back in so I wasn't sure what you meant.
I would suggest someone with ocd to place nanny cams that they can access from their phone in key areas of the house. 1 facing the oven for example. then they can check their phone througout the day to ease anxiety.
That would not help. Hard to explain but with OCD “checking” is what needs to be avoided. Having cameras would make someone with OCD more likely to check and check and check when they aren’t home, so this is the opposite of what someone with OCD needs because they need to stop checking thing. Hope this explains some things!
@@SchizoKitzo Oh I think I see. It's important to break the practice of checking and rechecking.
I have an appointment with my psychiatrist this week about switching meds and my ocd is really flaring up. I had a hospital visit a couple years ago from switching meds and do not feel safe switching meds without being in the hospital but also cannot afford to miss work. The medication is lamictal which you said you're on and I have just seen some pretty scary videos about its side effects which I know will happen with any medication I look up incldung seroquel xr which I am on right now and have been for a couple years. Just feel really lost and hopeless right now and I am really scared. My diagnosis is major depressive, generalized anxiety and ocd.
Just really need someone that understands because the littlest things take over my life and I feel so much shame for having nothing left to give when I only work 30 hours a week and do nothing besides that :( I just want the constant torment to end
The worst type of osd is when it's a situation and you have to react in a particular way.i had a allergec reaction to lamicdal stivan Johnson syndrome it was really bad
about to start this one and i'm nervous , were the side effects really bad ?
@@gloomye5596 its very rare ,like 1 in a million,i was unlucky
I'm schizo too and have OCD I won't mention I actually wrote a book along those lines but great example the kissing one I never had that one unless I came across certain people 🙂 laughter is the best medicine aye kit kat ha
My first diagnosis was osd.
Is this a new version of aversion therapy and nicotine abatement thru the smoking of multible cartons of Chesterfields in one sitting?
Also what music do u use in the background?
It’s called “No. 10 A New Beginning” by Esther Abrami from the TH-cam audio library! 🎶
❤
Wasn't OCD an OK show the ole WB?
when you've been through the system and mi rigamarole long enough, you learn that diagnoses are only helpful in the very beginning, to name the demon.
eventually, it becomes simply a matter of which meds work and if you can tolerate the side effects-and this will give you insight into how useless diagnoses are at the end of the day.
Medication is based on diagnosis. When I was misdiagnosed I didn't get the right medication and it was hell. So I would say that a diagnosis is definitely important if you are being medicated (and even if you aren't being medicated for non-medicine treatment options).
Are those real candles?
Heck no my hair has caught on fire twice from candles. I love me some good fake ones for ambiance tho!
You're so cute
You are a shil for the NSA
CDO had to put it alphabetical order
HA
Iused to suffer from obsessive compulsive disorder. I got rid of by finding god and giving everything to him. I stopped being ocd
Lucky you!
Only Jesus Christ can help hwr.
Jesus Christ might approve of using the help that is available. Like medication and therapy.
So why hasn't he?