If he's paying you

[@kevin7151]

As a male in a longstanding marriage, I have no issues providing support for a partner who was there for me in so many aspects in my life. However, given how todays laws treat men in divorce and child custody/support, explains why so many men are refusing to get married. The financial risks are significant for men and men have awoken to that very fact.

[@georgegraham9206]

The word entitlement was used an awful lot

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@georgegraham9206 yeah! Because when it's the law, it's a matter of right - you are entitled to it. Its not "being entitled" if you actually ARE entitled. The problem is when you act entitled to something that you are not entitled to.

[@Andy-u2g]

Only a fool would get married in the United States .

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@Andy-u2g it's fine to not get married. But I think it's a problem when people don't get married but take on all the characteristics of a married couple - buying houses, having babies - and then have no way to resolve their break up. It's a position of extreme vulnerability, often more for women than men.

[@stanlysteemer4872]

You are completely correct, with the extreme feminism you’re absolutely correct.

[@gailspringborg2061]

A woman shouldn't be entitled if all she did was spend the money that he doubled down to provide.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@gailspringborg2061 I don't know what women you know - but I've literally never known that to be the case. Though many women DO spend - the majority of consumer spending - because we're taking care of entire households.

[@commenter5469]

@@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorceApparently there’s A LOT you don’t know!!!
Actually - there’s not much you do know. But running your mouth!

[@brianmerkel704]

Why does he owe you money for the rest of your life?
You are no longer entitled to his money once you got divorced!
Why is the government not involved in the nuptials but all of a sudden the government is needed in the divorce!
Woman want to be treated equally, until it’s time to be treated equally, like taking care of themselves!

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@brianmerkel704 government has always been involved. Government issued the marriage license. The government processes your taxes every year. In most places, spousal support is no longer indefinite - and if it is, it's for good reason. It also doesn't mean that immediately upon divorce she can just magically make the same or even similar money. Adjustments are made. Most women worked already or go back to work and are happy to do so. They just can't and should not live in poverty while their husband maintains the same standard of living.

[@TrueNovice]

Yeah it's legaly obligated, like you are an endentured servant. Hard to understand when there are no kids, but she's entitled to continue the lifestyly you may have made possible.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@TrueNovice no one maintains their standard of living after divorce. It's costly and, anyway, two households are more expensive to maintain than one. But it's as a direct results of her contributions to the marriage and to the success that you (and/or she) may have achieved personally or professionally.

[@g.h.5057]

​@@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce What about her "contributions" to getting divorced? What if she's the reason? Or how about if he was well off prior to the marriage and "she" contributed absolutely NOTHING to his success?

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@g.h.5057 in most states - and VA, where I practice - anything earned, purchased, or acquired prior to marriage is separate already - so not factored in to asset division.

[@SPEEDOFDOG]

This is the reason I never got married 😂

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@SPEEDOFDOG doing women everywhere a favor 🫶🏻

[@SPEEDOFDOG]

@@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce 🤣if you say so. Case in point.

[@kristinadevine707]

America... Lawyers have ruined your country.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@kristinadevine707 yeah it's true! Advocating for those who would otherwise be bulldozed

[@mauricepowers8079]

Sometimes it is fair, other times it is not. To label it as an "entitlement" is just plain arrogant. Somehow the "poor, poor, pitifull me" act ... just doesn't come across as anything close to believable with this woman.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@mauricepowers8079 I mean entitled in the sense that it is given to you by law.

[@omarjassar4650]

But what if he receives spousal support , do the same rules also apply ??

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@omarjassar4650 yes.

[@omarjassar4650]

@@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce cool 😎

[@commenter5469]

@@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce😂 You are “Nuts”!!! Gold digger!!!

[@claudeivey4997]

Long answer..... Noooooo!

[@omarjassar4650]

@@claudeivey4997 I knewed it , I didn't knewed it before but now I knewed it

[@canucutitnoucant3351]

Makes me irritated....GET a job too

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@canucutitnoucant3351 in many cases, they already have jobs! We're not necessarily talking about stay at home moms. But there's a wage gap, childcare is insanely expensive, and juggling work and home life means many women have to work part time, work from home, work in a lesser paid but more flexible environment, etc. Women are also promoted less often and given raises less than men. So all of this just amounts to a really challenging situation.

[@g.h.5057]

Support should not be simply based on mathematics. Fault should be considered in all support. If "she" is a cheater or just decided to change her mind, she's not entitled to $HIT!! Support should be like justice should be, "he" is innocent until proven guilty!
Edit: Here in Pennsylvania, part of the judges retirement is funded by a percentage of support awarded. THAT'S why it's it's simple math.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@g.h.5057 WHAT? I will be researching that. That seems insane! There should be no personal motivation. In virginia, where I practice, if you commit adultery it is a bar to spousal support, except in cases of "manifest injustice". Every state is different.

[@g.h.5057]

​I personally experienced it. My ex cheated and eventually left. Support wasn't even decided by a judge. We went in, they took my income subtracted hers and I paid the difference. At the time, I was bringing home around $1200 every 2 weeks, she was getting $750 out of each paycheck. Thank God, we settled before I lost everything.

[@BradKandyCroftFamily]

Then why do women who worked during the marriage still get it? Why don't men get it, even when she was the bigger earner, or he stayed home with the kids? The idea is a nice sentiment, but it's not practiced like this at all.

[@tobyfitzpatrick565]

Some men do get it. My sister's ex husband got it from her. It does happen.

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@BradKandyCroftFamily It's a question of income shares, not just whether she worked. If he earns more, spousal support just bridges the gap a little - though it doesn't equalize the incomes, at least, not in Virginia. Men get it, too, but I work in a firm where I represent women only and all of my content is geared towards women. There are men only firms too, so if you're looking for that kind of info, you can find it - just not here.

[@brianmerkel704]

It is money you DO NOT HAVE AN ENTITLEMENT TO!

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@brianmerkel704 review the laws in your state. In my state, many women do have an entitlement to support based on our statute.

[@Chris-hp2gg]

Why buy the cow when the milk is free?😂

[@canucutitnoucant3351]

Entitled

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@canucutitnoucant3351 yes - you are entitled to something that the law gives you.

[@jed1729]

Well if you lived in Florida unless you're married over 20 years you get almost zero

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@jed1729 every state is different - and most are getting more restrictive every year

[@williamwallace6046]

BS

[@barbmelle3136]

What a delusional mindset. If you are that instrumental to his success, then why are you not able to build your own success? If it was really a partnership, then why did the marriage fail, why did you file for divorce?

[@YourGirlfriendNeedsaDivorce]

@@barbmelle3136 it's hard to juggle a household, raise children, and work like you're not managing a house and children. Humans are a communal species; we have evolved to work together and live in communities with different people handling different aspects of life. If he wanted a different balance, why did he agree to the one that existed? I think we have to assume that the balance or division of labor that existed is what was agreed upon by the people involved. We can't act like she's solely responsible and should alone walk away with less.