Why Men STOP Sharing Their Feelings - Stoicism in a hyper emotional world
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ม.ค. 2025
- Men are told to share their feelings. But what if those feelings are not approved as the "right" feelings? I believe stoicism is needed and people should work on their emotional self control.
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Can't share feelings anymore without it being used against you.
You are not wrong, but resilience is not free
Correct.
Yeah, but that's only for people that have something to lose
I was going to write the exact same thing.
Yeah.
The reveal of their true feelings towards you is a greatest test of mettle.
Will you buckle?
Will you yield to their will or will you stand up and walk away from them once they're reveal to be useless.
Older i get more i need peace and being in nature. I don't need drama, chaos and constant rush this modern society puts on me.
I agree with jariranki
@user-jw9lq5ib6g YT Can also be used for education as a bypass to the drama, chaos and rush. You can have the latter.
That is absolutely correct. I'm 67 and city life is killing me.
yes, it's called Testosterone decline, I can totally relate
@@victorstalick5528who's that?
The second you open your mouth to say something, you will be attacked.
People don't listen to each other anymore with an open mind.
Correct.
College has made ppl even more close minded than ever before. Both directly and indirectly.
@@acrane3496 I think that it's social media more than college.
Then you need safer people to be around
What you are describing is sometimes a reaction to a reaction. Sometimes when you say something, it is after a certain amount of thinking and is not unhinged. But other times it is a hyper emotional reaction to stimulus. I think that society is very used to these observations and that's where the attacks come in. Like if I saw a tweet and really quickly thought "that was dumb" and then provided that comment, I'm going to immediately get people who are criticizing me for possible reasons that I think it is dumb. So what is the solution? Well, one is to not verbalize all reactions, we are entitled to our own thoughts and opinions and they only get judged when you share them. That sounds very stifling to people, but it is asking a lot to be able to react to things publicly and expect society to be kind, listening, thoughtful, and non-judgmental. There has to be some responsibility on the individual level of what you are reacting to and how. One example is driving - do you need to react with hand gestures to anything while driving? How often do people react to someone in front of them slowing down suddenly, only to find out they were slowing down due to the car ahead of them slowing down? Everyone should try to tone down their reactions, opinions, and judgment in life. Slow them down, minimize them a little bit. Then there's the idea that people have of having to respond to things. If someone sends you a really bad text or tweet, response is optional. There is a lot of power in not responding. Not everyone is a CEO who has to provide a public response to things. Especially when you find that people are trolling and trying to get a response out of you, it is more powerful a lot of the time to not respond then to find some really edgy zinger, especially with trolls because they have so much practice, they can anticipate any response you give anyway. I think people really need to practice not responding/reacting to things or turning down the temperature in their responses, maybe being more direct, less passive aggressive in responses.
It’s harder and harder to find people who can carry on a meaningful conversation with.
Yes and there is ,,, me , what about me ,me ,me
DAMN TRUTH IF I EVER HEARD IT
Yes.
A 79-year-old living alone in a remote setting with less than a handful of old friends dying but not ready to talk about it, I have little choice but to be stoic. Reasonably healthy, I walked six miles this morning before breakfast and shared a little with the roadside, the creek, the birds. In what might be a last letter to a dying friend who just survived six days without electricity in Houston TX, I included a scrap on which I wrote: "At the end of the day, memories are all that matter." I won't get a response from him.
My thoughts are with you and your friends.
You sound like a wonderful friend to humans and nature. Memories are all we have sometimes. Blessings to you! 💕
Same here, and today I've been pondering on what I should write. Thanks.❤
I am a 67 yr old woman in America and enjoy your channel.
At 72, but in a similar position, I am a bit behind you but I see where this is going. Every time I talk to my few close friends, I wonder if next time there will be silence. Or perhaps it will be I that go silent.
To enjoy what we have and to be stoic , is all we can do.
The stillness of being in a quiet space helps us think and reflect, which is how we had such great thinkers and philosophers in the past. Unnecessary noise in the modern world is disorienting our brains...
Very true and well said.
Very true.
I dont find that to be the case. I believe 95% of everything out there is actively trying to manipulate me in some way, for some reason. When I hear people speak I ask myself what are their motivations by saying this, what do they want people to do, and just as important I dig into their history and find out who they are connected to. Its jaw dropping how within three points of contacts you see a known bad actors name. Then you know the fruit of that tree must at the very least be very handled with suspicion if not rejected outright.
Withdrawing from the world for inner peace just leaves you an island. I dont intend for my children to only have an island.
If you can't hear the white noise of wind passing through trees, water over stone or waves against the sand....there is too much other noise.
Fresh and fit channel youtube
Constant contact, no connection. Lots of substances, nothing substantial. Unplugging and learning how to live with the silence solves so many ailments.
So true, words of wisdom.
Yes. People all over, but no connections with any really, Not much love left in this world.
When I can't get outside and reconnect with nature, your channel gives me the next best thing
I feel more and more like checking out and walking into the woods, never looking back.
Right
The woods saved me be patient it's a gradual spiritual journey.
'They' won't let you mark my words .Big Brother will be watching your every step.
@@soma4u289 “they” are more than welcome to send someone in after me. None will come back.
Same , why I take long fishing trips alone in the wilds, it’s peace and the best relaxation…nature frees us from dealing with unnecessary stress, and connects us to the earth
Bjorn, I understand what you are saying. Two years ago, I bought a boat and sailed it alone for almost two years. I lived on my boat with no contact with civilization, and it was the best time of my life.
Everyone needs this quiet
You’ve got that right! Noise! It starts in the cradle. Kids are overstimulated with colours, lights, noise and crowds. Everything and everyone has a breaking point. An excellent life lesson is learning to be alone and having quiet time to just be.
Keep doing this videos man! Lets try to save the Manhood left in this word ❤
As soon as men express their feelings, it usually ends up being used against them.
As soon as women express their feelings, it usually ends up being used against them.... or they are completely shut down.
@@djf8619that's not even remotely close to men.
Always used against them. Always.
100%
You guys should get off the internet. This is not true
Amen brother. Self-control is the only control you have in the world
Much respect to you for throwing away the smart phone. I respect stoicism. It guided Marcus Aurelius throughout his life and i find so much inspiration from his Meditations. The world has lost itself. When we go within, we can find peace. I am highly discriminating at almost 50 with what i share and whom i share with. The noisiness of this world has this introvert ready for a meditative life in a peaceful rural setting. 😁
What he is referencing is not Stoicism though.
I really enjoy your videos. 66 years old and female. I like to be quiet. On my own. In nature: the woods, on the hilltop, by the sea early in the morning. Stoicism helps me a lot. I don't have to have an opinion, or express an emotion. Peace!
Been a working stoicism in my life for years. Life is so much better when you control yourself. You are not a slave to others BS.
A Norwegian summer is like a Scottish summer, to be cherished before the long dark nights of winter.
I thank you for your edifying videos, Bjorn. May you progress more, brother.
Latvian latitudes are the same as Scotlands', so there should be some similarity between us too.
have you ever been to the Smoky Mountains in Tennessee and N. Carolina ? if not come on down for a spell 🙂
Same in Minnesota, except maybe shorter... Cherish every moment.
Old Middle-Eastern saying: There is safety in silence.
I agree with you both in silence, self-control and stoicism. Silence and quietness is so important and everywhere is noise. People seem not to be able to cope with silence, perhaps they can't hear their inner voice, they are afraid of the "void" left from the absence of noise, exposing their confused state of mind...Everywhere there is "music", loud (not music, noise) in shops, on the beach (instead of just listening to the waves), in the supermarkets, etc. I've often complained about that in the attempt to form some movement against that. Often I hear that "I'm the only one who complained"....I often feel that I'm a bit different from mainstream people, but I don't care, it's just how I am.
I came to this sideways. I learned that when I feel anxiety, I have to transform it into positive action. When I began to do this successfully, my emotions naturally became more stable. This revealed to me that the origin of many strong emotions was a feeling of helplessness.
Yeah. It can be transformed. I used to change sadness and feeling powerless into anger and will to act. Still, it's been easier when I had more contact with nature. When I could take a walk, hear just nature sounds and be completely alone. In the city. I feel always a
rush.
Very true
@@mentalblasphemy6216
Its not a bitter statement, but as a man you cannot win. If you do not share your feelings you are a cold and heartless person, if you over share you are a basket case. You are expected to be strong and vulnerable at the same time. I have recently totally burntbout from my job (hugely sressful) and have taken a lot of time for introspection and my conclusion is stoicism is more important than ever, sometimes you just have to get on with things and not over think. I am so glad to have found your channel, you come across with a gentle, wise nature and real tonic in the mad times here in the UK.
I completely agree that finding places where you can enjoy quiet moments is very important. Those of us with mountains nearby are spoiled to be able to do this often.
Another outstanding video Bjorn.
Thank you Bjorn, you express all I feel about the world today. As a 70 year old NZ woman in the south of the South Island, I find peace where I can. My husband and I were hikers or (trampers in our country) and found much pleasure in walking amongst the forests and mountains. Injury has prevented this pastime, but just a walk near the river and in the short tracks near our home, sometimes in complete silence, no talking, replenishes our souls. We both have an interest in stoicism, which as you state, means different things for men and women. It is a rare and wonderful thing in this day and age, to find a video with someone speaking quietly and truthfully about themselves and how they view the world. Keep it up sir, we both wish you well.
I backpacked your country in 1989 mostly The South Island (less tourists) you live in one of my personal top 3 most beautiful places in the world if I myself was more flexible in life I'd ditch it all dust off my pack and disappear to your Southern Alps (probably not truly feasible) I am living in Chattanooga Tennessee and every possible moment I can either get on my bike or even hike outside of the city I do there's a Japanese philosophy of communing with nature (I don't remember what it's called , and Im not going to Google it) and believe you me there's some beautiful wilderness close by to just sit AWAY from all of this 21st century mumbo jumbo ! anyway I'm rambling here 😊 enjoy your day and may you find peace ps. I loved the little tiny sandwich shops in NZ one in particular was in Christchurch LOL
Stoicism is the currency of the future.
Those who are too emotional and reveal their weaknesses too often will be controlled by those who feel little or hide much.
Sadly true.
@@jennywren8937 Ouch!! true..... 😢
Well said
But that has nothing to do with Stoicism the philosophy. Stoicism is about living virtuously. Stoicism and being stoic are two different things.
@eric explain that please 😮
Love your quiet conversations Bjorn, as a 60 plus years old woman I very much appreciate QUIET
oh cmon, lets get drunk and bicker for 2 hours!!! 😁
@@RobertBoston-n4d😅👍
Bjorn, men dont share their feelings because nobody cares. Sad but true.
i used to be more open and that was absolutely used against me by people who claimed to have loved me
I like to think they have been left behind, and I'm better for it.
been there done that ! more times than I can count
Me too, I tend to open up to everyone and they think im a nut.
Need to be careful what you share..
It’s looks so magical and peaceful where you are. Hard to find places like that in England these days. Thanx for another great bud 👍
Never complain. Never explain. // My life = My rules.
That's the philosophy I'm striving for.
Where do you get these emojis
@@jake4404
@@jake4404 Who cares about emojis?
@@hadeseye2297 Modern 'adults'.
Had a girlfriend that was angry, yelling at me. Over nothing. All rooted in her own insecurities and doubts. She was just expecting me to give a positive reflection of them back to her. Which I didn't. I told her the honest truth. She didn't want the truth, she wanted me to agree with her as if it would make her feel better. She was convinced she was overweight, and not skinny enough. Untold her she looked great, and would look worse if she lost weight. So she got mad. I remained quite, let her vent. Once she was done i remained quiet. She than asked me if inwas some kind of psycho or something, and asked why I had no emotion towards her dilemma. She should ask the realnquestion, why the dilemma, who stayed the dilemma, where will it really take her, why the dilemma? I can be emotional. Deeply emotional and vocal. Over nonensene however, it's not right to be. Yetbwere in an age where it's expected. She now has the chance to find a man that can scream and wave there hands around like her. 20 years ago if people would habe done that in public, they woulda been taken away.
Tell her about the end of Karen Carpenter, she was skinny and thought, in her head she needed to lose more weight, she died form that conviction.
What was her height and weight?
Women, cant live without them,and cant live with them. Glad I grew up in the 60's when men and women didn't try to identify as the opposite sex,and feminism wasn't as toxic. Better to be alone than tortured in a bad relationship.
She clearly had mental issues
Impulse control disorder abounds since 2020 ☣️
I'm so glad I stumbled upon your wisdom while I was scrolling. My son is 38 this year and at the moment he is camping solo in the Kruger National Park, with his camera. Your points of view help me to understand my son more, even though we are very close and share many thoughts together. I am a music teacher and have young students come to my house for their lessons. I find solace, peace and quiet by staying away from the social scene in the small village I live in -- it just makes life unnecessarily noisy. I never feel lonely.
About 6 months ago I started reading books on stoicism and philosophy. I can honestly say things in the world and encounters I have with people bother me far LESS than they used to. I am learning to better manage patience and attitude. I see things more for what they are and less how I would like them to be. Thank you again for your channel. ❤️🙏
In the woods on a hike in south New Jersey. Share your feelings on silence. Like a dark night sky it’s disappearing . I see the younger generation loosing connection to the natural world. Too much information is as bad as not enough. Thanks, peace all
In the Pineys, eh? I used to live in Cape May.
"people talk too much n talk to fast" yep totally agree with that statement. World needs to slow down a bit.
Social media, smartphones, tablets, TH-cam, podcasts… people are slowly loosing it; collective insanity, absolute poison ☠️
Bloody well right mate ,even at the dinner table, hopeless!
Might have been slow...but it's speeding up exponentially I think!
You do realise you're commenting on TH-cam?
@@nicola1466 Maybe use the tool to spread the word , could be seen as an advantage.
Tools od mass brainwashing.... Tools to eat your life and your time. Damn them all
Thank you. Your wise thoughts give me inner peace in this noisy world.
34 years old female from Quebec, Canada here. I watch your videos because they are so peaceful, calming and true. I feel “normal” when hearing those things because it is exactly what my soul has been longing for, for so many years. Thank you for sharing in such a calm, firm and steady manner. We need more of you in this world.
@@Sunny.Amy44 When I tried to be 'normal' I knew that I didn't fit in.
For me as a women who feels deeply at home in her feminine essence your words are a huge gift.
We are longing for men who live what you say. We need men like you. A firm rock. Stillness. Power.
We are more like the ocean, constantly changing our form, feeling many different emotions, also due to our hormonal cycles.
(I am not referring here to the DRAMA a lot of immature little princesses in the body of a grown up women create).
Thank you so much for sharing this.
I very much appreciate your work.
"we are longing for men who live what you say", well these men have demands too
@@Kai-zv6gc That's what I teach the women in my membership. When they apply what I say (and what I live) they are a huge gift for a man.
I get what you are saying Bjorn. In groups I am always the quit one, but in reality I am assessing each individual ( not judging. They are who they are ) and it takes time to realized how each individual brain functions as far as how honest you can be with each individual. When I was going thru a divorce I talked with an older gentleman while having coffee in a small restaurant who I knew had gone through one. He sat back on the chair, took a couple sips of coffee and looked me straight in the eyes and said " sometimes divorces can be a blessing". It took a couple of weeks to understand what he was saying as I began to feel happier and free from all the hassle
Bjorn, once again 100% correct. I get sick of some of these people that feel they need to have tantrums, stamp their feet, yell and abuse everyone for problems they most likely made for themselves. You only need to go to a supermarket and see how most little kids behave these days. However, if you say something to the parent, well then you're the worst person in the world.
Love your videos, I have Viking heritage myself and I know exactly what you mean. Skől!
They tell the people to show more emotions but they probably have never heard about Emotional intelligence.
Exactly. Very bad idea to advertise one's vulnerabilities to any but the very closest of trusted friends and even then its not by any means a sure bet that it won't bite you in the ass down the line.
@@JesseP.Watson Even the most trusted and close to you are humans with their traumas, frailty, judgements. Most it seems are in it for themselves and will take advantage of you in some way or another.
@@deadreckoning6288 Indeed. I suppose by 'biting you in the ass' I mean, and I've experienced this often as I'm very open, even those close to me who mean well and love me will, through compassion, reflect back those vulnerabilities shared later down the line in ways that are not actually helpful. In the most obvious way, if we say: "I'm ill and suffering," they'll take that onboard, which is what we hope for, and treat you accordingly... but, the day will come, hopefully, when you are well and strong. When that day arrives, they will likely not understand and will continue to treat you as a fragile person and so we end up being framed by those vulnerabilities then in a way that is detrimental to our persona... having reflected our past internal struggles out, they then start being reflected back to us later down the line and so can then undermine the new strength we have found, lead folk to question it and not quite believe it.
So, for that reason, these days I'm very cautious about exporting anything but my best because it's much better to have those around one expecting one to be strong and inspirational even when one is actually feeling anything but than to have folk suspecting one is weak and fragile when in fact we are full of strength and light.
Very simply put: focus on the light, speak of that, and that will be what surrounds us, focus on darkness and that will be what surrounds us.
Emotional intelligence is a phrase that has been around for a while. More than twenty years ago I read one book about it. Roughly a year later I read another book about emotional intelligence at work. Sometime after reading the first or maybe both books, the man in charge of the unit sent out an email about emotional intelligence training coming up. I soon saw another email from him that the training was only for the leadership team. I felt a bit mischievous, and replied back to him, "That is fine. I read the books." I thought it was amusing. 🤣🤣
@@onlyone2948 Thinking about it... I reckon perhaps emotional intelligence used to be called "wisdom". [Well, I think it's fair to say one quality of wisdom is emotional intelligence, whether those with emotional intelligence are wise is another matter, maybe so but you definitely can't do a training day in wisdom... OR NOT UNTIL NOW - Opens web design software. 🤓]
Stoicism is being able to choose (at any given moment) what is allowed to be on your emotional radar. We can't really choose which emotions come knocking, but we can choose to open the door or not. Being a stoic is being able to discern what is and is not an appropriate emotional response in whatever situation you find yourself.
I agree
I agree. Fylde Coast UK
It's something I talked about just yesterday with my wife. This peace thing. People have not enough silence in their lives. It's constant noise and overstimulation. Which is also constant stress for the body. We need moments to spend in a quiet place each day to make a break from stress. I work my ass right now to get us back to living in the village.
Thanks for being there!
STOICISM IS MY FAVORITE PHILOSOPHY. I did not know I had on all caps. but it's equally important to men and women. It leaves me with a sense of peace. Meditations is a book I read over and over. I see nothing in it for it to be labeled as what you said. I can't wait for the insanity to go away, IF it does. Thanks B jorn!
IMO XX chromosome people have a very difficult time understanding STOICISM too much of their existence is based on emotions
So true! One of my favorite concepts and philosophies as well. Not appreciated enough nowadays.
A quiet place, a quiet time, a quiet mind, all very under rated in today's mad world.
Just take a lot of 'NO NOTICE' of where the noise comes from.
I agree … I can’t escape it.. endless negative chat, loud and fast at work and everywhere I go, I escape to the Forrest or beach alone in my free time
You bring me peace. I am happy that your chanel was shown to me Bjorn. Gracias from Chile
So glad to hear that, and to have you 'on board'.
@@BjornAndreasBull-Hansen MUCHAS GRACIAS BJORN !
Nice drone shots, thank you. I can't get enough quiet time, I live solo by choice, don't have a guest room, don't entertain, and don't invite people into my home. Sometimes even my dogs are too much 😂😂😂
Adult males know that the self is the first place to seek when seeking help for any
problem. The solution invariably lies within when facing challenges that arise in this life.
If you have control of your own mind and spirit...at ease with both, then you have the
primary answer to most concerns.
Facts
That's a highly perceptive comment and completely in alignment with my philosophy.
Easier said than done in this modern world but yes.
adult females know this too ;). I guess with all the noise goign on around us adults... we loose the peace and quiet that is needed to get to know ourselves and accept ourselves as we are
I believe we should be very selective in the way we share our emotions
Not everyone is worthy of sharing your emotions. Not everyone can be trusted. The trouble is that we have all these propaganda memes floating around in our heads about how we are supposed to be. But really, they are only meant to get us to lower our defenses so that we can the more easily be plundered and exploited. That's all that they are for. They are a clever form of brainwashing.
Definitely, look deeply within. Find out why you have a " bad" emotion. Get a piece of paper,ask yourself questions. The answers will come.
I think that if you are drawn to like minded people, you can express your emotions without worrying. That being said , the more like minded those people are, there is no need to express anything as they know all ready!! Great message yet again
Emotion is best expressed in moments of quiet reflection. There is no upside to displaying emotion in public. It mostly only harms, it seldom helps. A man must understand and feel through his own emotions. But there is scant benefit to sharing or expressing them. Love and care are best expressed through action, rather than words. A man is what he does, not what he says.
A man is what hé does, not what hé says....oh my ...my ex husband what the opposit....😅.
No women need to hear words of love to them, so do kids.
@@connydm729but you chose and married him, don't pretend you didn't knew what you were getting into 🙄
Thank you. I need more of what you talked about. At 72 I think I've lost some of those skills and must bring them back to my life.
Don't let your emotions dictate your actions. Simple.
That has been my problem al my 70 yrs and many others' problem, and our toxic modern society encourages it. Dumbing down the masses.
Hello Bjorn🤗 I totally agree with you, the modern world and culture are very intense, that's why i like listening you, because it always brings me peace. Greetings from Poland🌞
Sometimes I just need to hear myself think,I just go to the the rest room and close the door and take time to think where nobody will bother me.Being an Empath just drains me,I can feel and read everyone's emotions, and it effects my mood.I love when I'm home alone and can sit for hours in pease.People cause fatigue and now j understand the quiet people around me,and don't take it personally.
As an 83 year old Welsh man I miss my times of Stoicism. Where I live the green hills and mountains gave me that. I longer get out to long walks and rambles along our coastal paths and mountains as my worn out knees and hips will not allow me to. I so envy you and where you are now I live with my noisy young family who forever stare at the screen on the phone oblivious of all the beautiful things that surround them their are consuming Facebook Twitter and other social media.I now find things to repair and hide away in my garage i now use for a workshop the only stoicism and in the evening watching people like you that I was once while ago.
Da iawn 👍
When in the woods and you hear no noise, you are being hunted.
Hi from the Orkney Islands , lucky enough to be able to walk from my home to the beach for shutter therapy ( with camera ) , great for restoring the mind .
Would love to visit the Orkneys. 👍
Always helpful hearing your words my friend, Skol ✌️
Could not agree more. Am ill at moment and have just spent 8 days in hospital…with TVs blaring, radios on full , cell phones, constant banal chatter, raucous laughter by staff and general mayhem. I just want and need quiet and peace. xxx
Hospitals are not the place for true healing and well being. That should be apparent to everyone after the last 4 years.
Great conversation. Thanks!!!
Excellent topic and thorough examination of why Stoicism is vital for men...🤔
I feel that this is one of your best videos/topics. Thank you for addressing the - unspoken - issue of too much noise in our society, and with it, too much talk. It’s much appreciated!
I think something I've come to learn about myself is that almost every thought you have has some sort of emotional root and it takes careful and intentional focus to be logical and objective. We're not our thoughts, but rather the thoughts we focus on. But that's just an opinion.
Best cure for mental anguish is to be amongst nature. My greatest teacher of all.
Great topic! A lesson I never learned growing up...or refused...or I have no free will and was conditioned to be an over-sharer. Either way, definitely time to start zippin it.
Me too. Starting now 🤐
My experience as a guy is no one cares to hear about my problems, or rather, they do not want to hear it, so I learnt not to share my ''feelings''.
It can even ruin the mood in a social setting, as people get uncomfortable.
I sometimes said something after one too many beers, never doing that again.
I know for women it is very different, it is not always genuine, but people are often willing to listen.
I had this before, I had to leave that marriage and finally find a partner where everything is calm, there is this trust built where I could talk openly about my feelings without feeling attacked , feeling heard and validated. It's pretty incredible really
Expressing fellings, emotions Is a human attitude that everybody should have but only with empathetic people, with People Who are reliable
Björn, of all your videos that I've had the pleasure of watching, which is just a fraction of them this one is very special to me. It means a lot to me that you chose to discuss this and I want to thank you. Your words brought tears to my eyes and a sense of comfort. Thank you 😊
Grew up in a family and culture where stoicism is practiced. Was accused as a young women of being too unemotional because I seldom expressed emotions or had emotional reactions to even the worst teasing/bullying (well, I did tend to use my fists to shut bullies down). Guys thought it unnatural that I didn't flirt and act like the other girls - not that I cared. And yet these guys would complain about other girls being too emotional, too silly, and too big of a flirt.
Damned if I did and damned if I didn't.
Most people would benefit from minding their own business, practicing self-restraint, and listening more than talking. As for talking or expressing things - if it isn't true, isn't useful, isn't respectful, and isn't educational or practical, then maybe it is best left unsaid.
Agree. Too much talking, not enough listening in this modern society.
I've been called a cold bitch more than once for not over reacting.
😂😂, that help sometimes as a kid
Wow, very well said Allison. Both woman and man can learn from this
Well, even if women are encouraged to be like men these days, it's just not attractive to most of them, especially the men what you guys are looking for (the 20%), no offense
Stoicism is the key, I discovered this tool a few years ago , it does indeed assist greatly. As a feminine woman I realize that I’m stepping into my masculine side & left brain thinking when I slide into stoicism, it surprised me when this started to happen, how could I be so sure and cool making decisions without being emotional anymore? …..it’s my badge of honour for passing tests and learning lessons. I love it ❤ Totally badass.
We have intuition, feelings, intelligence - and we have core values. The three first alert us to be more aware, both inside and outwards. But the values are at the core of our existence, they point out our true north. When we love with wisdom, our life functions better than when we are constantly spontaneous and let always shifting feelings have the last word. But feelings should be volatile, like weather. However our values should be firm and dependable, as our actions that follow in the wake. I think this is what you shifted into. In its simple form visible thus: if you have a pet or a child, they need this safe and secure love, as also does our Inner Child, and the Inner Child of our husband's. That's real love. It is very feminine, wisely, proactively, far-sighted life-enhancing. Does this resonate with you?
@@DNA350ppm indeed, Yes…Resonates
@@stephf121 All the best wishes!!!
It's awesome that you are stoic! You can be stoic in a feminine way. It's a necessary adult trait. Don't worry too much about it ^^
Always enjoying your video's Bjørn, as a fellow norwegian. With the same first name btw. Stoicism is a thing, a force, a mental safespace and a guideline in life. And it's important now more than ever, in this societal chaos.
Constant noise. That’s a great observation. I have noticed I crave more silence and alone time in the woods and in the kayak. Cheers for the great chats.
Protect peace protect the quiet have moments of stillness in our live well said sir
Ive been a subscriber for a while and it's always a breath of fresh air when you share your wisdom. I'm on the other side of the planet in South Africa and have always enjoyed your content. All the best!
Your videos are the antidote to the madness and insanity of the modern world.
Luckily I live close to nature reserves and lakes and woods and enjoy the silence and solitude and peace in natural, untouched tranquility for an hour or two every day.
I'd go insane if I didn't have that respite from reality - a contemporary world fraught with division and anger and hate and idealogical lunacy.
There has to be other systems of peace and togetherness and a way to detach ourselves from the chaos around us, alone, disengaged, reflective, ourselves.
Thank you, Sir. Your words are wise in uncertain times.
"Protect the quiet". I hadn't thought of that in those terms. Thank you for your thoughts on this subject of endless streams of words, emotions, or just plain sound. Protect the quiet...I am going to mull that over for a while.
Oh neat coincidence seeing this uploaded within like 4 min. Called of sick today from work from a mix of actually being sick with something weird but also anxiety. Glad to see this. I always get so anxious when i have to call in sick, my manager just doesnt care. I told a different one the other day I'd probably be moving to part time. I was looking at continuing my education into horticulture but idk if thats really going to do much for me. I just want a job that helps nature.
Get better soon! And good luck with your plans.
@@eliteslayer66 Horticulture is wonderful. You'll love it.
@@BjornAndreasBull-Hansen thank you ^_^
@@jennywren8937 happy to hear.
You're on your way to 1 million subscribers 🤙 only a matter of time.
So often Every one is talking while no one is listening.
I am exhausted from all the noise in the world today, and I am a baby boomer, so I have been around for a long time and see the deterioration on the planet. I spend as much time as possible in nature because it soothes me greatly, and I limit my time around people and shopping centres.
I love watching your videos because they calm me - the scenery is magnificent as is the silence around you - and your voice is very calming also. I get what you are saying about sharing your emotions etc., you need the right person to hear you - a listener. I wish I was there, where you are in the forest, to listen to everything. Blessings.
I went back to stoic behavior a few months ago after many years of trying to share feelings and be open. Immediately various relationships, mood and even sleep improved.
Ever since I came across a book about Stoicism a few months back and the words of Marcus Aurelius and Seneca that I had read, the teachings of stoicism are especially applicable to todays modern world that just cannot stay silent and in silence do we find respite in a world that never sleeps.
It had helped me tremendously and had calmed a storm in me that has been brewing for years and it is something of incredible value for personal growth and development. It is a treasure trove when you know how to apply it.
Nature is our caretaker for as long as we live so we should treat it with the most respect for there are only things that nature can give.
Incredible video Bjorn, and so delicately and presicely put into the right words in just 10 minutes.
As a woman ( I am old enough to be able to remember what the difference between a man and a woman is ) I agree with what you have said in this video. We all have the same emotions but our different physiology and psychology means that we handle it in different ways.
Two halves of a whole.
@@earlymorningtwilight9119 Exactly. We are meant to work as a complimentary pair. Each brings their own kind of wisdom.
I'm a younger man, only 27, had a rather turmutous childhood, turned to nihilism, as it was the only idiology that made sense at the time, I was a bitter, violent, and cruel child then, angry at the world, well on the path to self destruction, I've combined it with stoicism in recent years, as well a few other other philosophies, and it's made me a better person, a better man, I know I have much more to learn, such is life, but I can honestly say I am hopeful for the future, which is not something I could say a few years ago, I will always regret the things I've done, but we can always choose to be better, to learn from our mistakes and the mistakes of others, we must, you do the world a service sharing your wisdom sir.
Stoicism is a worthy philosophy to practice.
I find that staying calm, being supportive, not putting down dreams and hopes goes a long way to my husband starting to open up and talk with me.
The system is supposed to be emotionless. That's how we ended up this deep in this mess.
Yes the system needed emotionless obiendient workers.
it's called the machine for a reason
"He who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities".
Part of that is not letting morals/emotions get in the way of committing those coming atrocities.
We obviously live in different systems. Stoicism is not the same as being emotionless. I think you need you research the concept more, but, you'll probably just call this stupid because you know better. It is what it is
“The system”? What system?
The most autocratic systems have demanded that you love those they want you to love, and hate those they want you to hate. They want you to fear , because without fear you will not see them as rescuers and leaders.
Freedom from the system means taking responsibility for your own emotions. Being in control both of the thoughts that inspire them, and the reactions that they produce.
Either you control your emotions, or others will control them. Your choice.
I have experienced this myself when I've opened up. As a man you are told to open up, but when you do just that, they say "no no not like that" or "no that makes women uncomfortable, you can't say things like that"
Society and it's ideas of vulnerability and honesty are very female centric
I had a thought like this back in early high school, where I was called upon to pick a style since I kind of dressed like I was doing my laundry most of the time. When it was the case of expression and individuality, my brain lucked out into some early wisdom by thinking 'people shop at the same places for clothing, or assign to the same kind of look, that seems like the least individualistic thing around. They're telling us all to be _these_ kind of individuals.' This also became a case of having specific opinions of things in social media and whatever, where it was something I just didn't care about or have the time to get into, and it was a case of 'that means you're not on our side', like I'd HAVE to pick one or risk deportation or something, I don't know.
There's still a ton of work for me to do on myself at 38, and with one near-death experience last year, I've learned better lessons that stick at last. But, that was one nice thing about being in hospital and not having the creature comforts and just.. feeling quiet for a long while, it wasn't a terrific time because I was post abdominal surgery, but I'd never felt smoother, more aware.
There was a lot of trauma in my childhood, divorce and all that, pretty standard stuff, and that's been a whole thing on its own, but one thing it kind of gave me was reality in the face of teenage bullshit. I didn't get to feel weak because there was simply no time, nobody to help, I had to help my mother and two brothers. It wasn't really stoicism, I guess, but I was able to grow with a constitution that could take emotional damage in stride, even if it was a lot at once. It's served me well at times, but it is also important to feel quiet and assess ones own damage sometimes. Gotta turn off the engine and check all the pieces.
Men have to heal their own trauma. Nobody else particularly cares.
It's a time of haters on social media. This channel helps me think about my future, off the grid. Thank you
I was expecting when I clicked on to the video that there would be no comments but here we are ! A bunch of men sharing there feelings in the comment section 😂..
Wise words Bjorn.Short and simple and heartfelt dialogue-something needed but being lost in a world of digital chatter
I'm a woman. I only share my feelings and deep thoughts with animals, birds and trees now. They are great listeners, non-judmental and can even be very supportive.
That's sad
@@amberrose1108 Your response ironically shows that you're the sad one here
@@nassergabriel4778 No, it does not show that person is sad. You have judged and concluded based on 2 words. A true Stoic would not do that. I suggest you go read some Kant, or Hume
Gosh you are blessed to be in such a beautiful place.
I learned a lot about self-control from Eckhart Tolle. "Accept everything that happens as if you had chosen it." That takes discipline and a different attitude towards life.