It was dirty butt romp dressing. I have a cooking show of my own but instead of these dipps I got my mom's pig in a blanket recipe vegan style so no hot dog but instead a celery stick and/or some with carrot stick white salt and some a combination black olive slices garnish and stick wrapped in a blanket of bread dough. Then after I get those out of the oven I'm going down to the mission to let the homeless in on some vegan style menu items from scratch ingredients I had around the kitchen.
The lazy portioning, the false confidence, the half-crazed look as he's violently stirring, the adding mustard to everything... these are some of the many reasons I love this series, and wish it would come back
You wouldn't think that adding mustard to things and having Eric get kind of quietly annoyed would be so funny, but....jesus christ, you guys have it down to an art.
But the best joke is that Tim is so determined to make this show even if he's not good at it, people don't like it, and he is neglecting his real job for it.
It’s mainly because Tim knows how important he is to the show that he forces people to do what he wants no matter how stupid it is, or what important thing your doing. He essentially is Holding their production team hostage till it’s run it’s course and they move on to their actual shows.
The fuckin cats were fine. Just use a little pitzmans mustard to clean the sewage off of them. Pitzmans mustard is also great for cleaning up flooding damage and sealing pipes that have been ruptured by roots!
I love that the premise behind this whole thing is buying various sauces to mix and turn into another sauce of which could have been purchased at the same time as the others.
"You were telling me something about the water pressure in your house, I thought that was interesting." Lmfao he's so disinterested in Eric's problems.
I've seen this so many times, but I still love how he tastes the dip with a dipstick, says it's "really nice," and then instead of dipping again, just eats the rest of the dry dipstick without any of the dip.
I love Pitzmans mustard, and I'm very happy to see a real Celebrity and inspiration in my life uses it too. Thanks Tim, your French onion dip was a huge success at my step son's half birthday party!
I heard that Pitzman's Mustard is really good for your skin texture, so I started filling latex gloves with mustard and wearing them in my sleep. Only problem is, I've developed this really weird rash and everyone is complaining I smell like raccoon urine. I don't think I'm using enough. Should I start applying it to my face, too?
+missiletoe99 No, go straight for where your glands are. As a trained doctor I suggest applying evenly to your groin and seeing if it improves the issue. - Dr Mogel, chef professor at Pitzman's Mustard
+Kayomn I did, and now doctors are telling me they've never seen anything like it when they look at my groin. I feel so unique! Thank you Pitzman's! +Nullll1111 Of course. Everyone tells me I have such a nice set of pearls in my mouth, but those are dentures. Didn't hurt a bit when they pulled my teeth out.
In all seriousness...this is legitimately how you make good French onion dip. Obviously, you don't squirt half a bottle of mustard in the mix. Just a little squirt adds a tangy kick to it, though. You are now informed. Use this information for the good of mankind.
I first watched this video when it came out 7 years ago. I was 10 at the time and my older brother introduced me to Tim and Eric with this series. I really couldn’t tell at the time what was so funny about it, but I always died of laughter and often come back for a dose of nostalgia.
Hey Tim, could you please explain what was going on with that "Abso LUTEly" clip? I understand it features your dad summing up a trip in 2 words, but ... I don't get it.
Hey Tim, this was an excellent episode! I made this dip with your secret ingredient, and everybody loved it! They said it was terrible and spat it out, and I even lost some friends, but I know that they are just super jealous of my awesome cooking skills. If only they knew.
I like to imagine they are storing all their emotions in a side of their brains to allow themselves to be so awkward. And they spend all their time off camera laughing explosively.
I'm happy that the forces of life brought Tim and Eric together to wig us out. Just think, we lived in the same time frame as these two artists, out of all the billions of hours in the universe past and future
I’ve always known he’s joking when he says he has had a lot of negative feedback… but every time I watch this, I get sad at the thought that Tim is being told his sauces suck 😔 Tim, I love your dips
tim hey it's me again I just made this sauce hoping to apologize to my family for the bruncheon incident. i invited my boss to enjoy superbowl sunday with some special onion dip and everyone hated it. my son and pepep both got sick from it, then my boss looked at me in the eyes and said "ya blew it" then stomped out of my house, but not before making an indecent pass at my wife. i thought my mistake last time was not using Pissman's mustard, but i made sure to track down a bottle (I had to buy one from a captain of a chinese shark fishing boat) but it still didn't make a difference. What did I do wrong?
Dj Garcia well that explains why the sticker on my mustard was different than the one tim uses. it looks like tim's mustard has a lovely drawing of a colonial house, and mine has a picture of a man sitting in an electric chair. I hate getting sucked into getting knockoffs of otherwise celebrated brands. thank you for the heads up, I'll try harder to find some Pitzman's mustard this time. Maybe my family will love me again when I whip up a special sauce with genuine Pitzman's™ Mustard. i'll never trust a chinese shark fisher again.
Tim, I don't know if you read these but I have to thank you. These tips are saving my marriage. She keeps saying that she can't figure out why my dips taste so good now. *psst* it's Pissmans. I won't tell if you dont. ;)
I am so glad you did this Tim. Honestly, I really was wondering how to make French onion dip for the longest time. Watching this was so much easier than asking a chef or something
Hey Tom, long time fan of Tam's Kitchen here (my 3th year anniversary of watching your cookermen show!) and just wanted to let y'know that you've still got us goons out here laying down some positive vibes your way! Rock on Trim!
@@botdfbvb You guys are absolutely right :D honestly I don't know what I was thinking 6 years ago, it had to be lapse in judgement you have to understand!
Tim and Eric you guys are hilarious! If every episode of awesome show was online and shown on youtube more people would know how briliant you guys are.
I love how they open with “well the first episode got a ton of negative feedback”
I lost it!! 😅
I loved when he said "no one cares!"
It was dirty butt romp dressing. I have a cooking show of my own but instead of these dipps I got my mom's pig in a blanket recipe vegan style so no hot dog but instead a celery stick and/or some with carrot stick white salt and some a combination black olive slices garnish and stick wrapped in a blanket of bread dough. Then after I get those out of the oven I'm going down to the mission to let the homeless in on some vegan style menu items from scratch ingredients I had around the kitchen.
“nobody cares”
The lazy portioning, the false confidence, the half-crazed look as he's violently stirring, the adding mustard to everything... these are some of the many reasons I love this series, and wish it would come back
Anything around food they always make so funny. I think the original Tim and Gelman Have Lunch is one of my favorite bits in the Tim & Eric realm
yes!
You wouldn't think that adding mustard to things and having Eric get kind of quietly annoyed would be so funny, but....jesus christ, you guys have it down to an art.
Don't forget clumsily mixing
Right? It's the subtlety that makes this so funny.
The mixing gets me every time! 😂👍🏻
i'm your 900th like, i will take my 900 dollars now
No one cares
Absolutely love the total indifference in Tim's face when Eric is describing his situation at home. Legends, the both of them.
But the best joke is that Tim is so determined to make this show even if he's not good at it, people don't like it, and he is neglecting his real job for it.
he's only doing it for the mustard lol
@@AnjjzzzI hate people like you
Tim Heidecker is like a lost Christian youth pastor
Anonymouswon best comment ever
Anonymouswon no joke!
I don’t get it
holy shat! longtime t&e fan... you fn nailed it!!! rofl!!! thank you, im totally stealing your words!
You should be a casting director, I can really see this
One more thing, I love how every time Eric comes out, it's a huge inconvenience.
amen to that XD
I love when he snaps in the 4th episode
He acts 🎭 so frenemies with Tim! Delicious 😄...
But he still shows up cuz hes his friend
It’s mainly because Tim knows how important he is to the show that he forces people to do what he wants no matter how stupid it is, or what important thing your doing. He essentially is Holding their production team hostage till it’s run it’s course and they move on to their actual shows.
He really laid on the guilt trip with “who knows where the cats are”
The fuckin cats were fine. Just use a little pitzmans mustard to clean the sewage off of them. Pitzmans mustard is also great for cleaning up flooding damage and sealing pipes that have been ruptured by roots!
I love how Tim pronounces Pitzman's like Pissman's lol.
Well that’s how it’s pronounced dumb shit
@@Capnsensible80 probably the latter...or as he would apparently say lasser because pissman and pitzman sound exactly the same
Isn’t it spelled “pissmans”?
@@gregbradshaw7220 Pitz vs Piss dumbshit
theres so many subtle funny things
The sound of the mixing is literally one of the best parts of these sketches.
Official B17 R473 they got a microphone just for that
+Official B17 R473 I just love how he gets aggressive.
+Official B17 R473 what do you mean, sketch?
I also like the mess he makes and then when he scoops it back into the bowl!
+Official B17 R473
"That's what good pussy sounds like."
I love that the premise behind this whole thing is buying various sauces to mix and turn into another sauce of which could have been purchased at the same time as the others.
"I have sewer water going into my house right now, and who knows where the cats are..." -Eric
"and when I say I have an emergency I'm not fucking around..."
Thats tricky
An alternative to making this dip is to just dip an onion in mustard and take a bite of it.
***** fer yer health
Same for the honey mustard video.
Just grab a beehive, dip it in mustard and boom. Honey mustard.
Get rid of those bees first though.
You gotta speak french while eating the onion, too.
Lol
@@0mnicide lmfao.
Don't pay attention to the negative comments Tim. I've showcased all of your various dips at many gatherings and they are ALWAYS a hit!
So wonderful to showcase Tim's trademark dips, even still!
My old Moe-Moe told me on the day I left for America, _"Son, remember to showcase Tim's signature dips."_
@@Elrond_Hubbard_1 Did your pep-pep give you any extra wisdom?
"You were telling me something about the water pressure in your house, I thought that was interesting."
Lmfao he's so disinterested in Eric's problems.
"My message to the haters out there? No one cares. Nobodies listening."
- Tim Heidecker
Best advice ever.
Sounds like Tim Cook
"Well...uh, ya gotta get yer place ready fer, fer Superbowl Sunday, whenever that's comin up"
You can see Eric almost break the moment after Tim said that.
I've seen this so many times, but I still love how he tastes the dip with a dipstick, says it's "really nice," and then instead of dipping again, just eats the rest of the dry dipstick without any of the dip.
Well it's rude to double dip
@@BioYuGi What’s rude is being this inconsiderate to Eric.
I love how he almost goes into a trance while mixing.
"It comes right off, it's just mustard" Tim, you're a god
“My message to the haters is: no one cares and no one’s listening.”
*opens the episode with this message*
Lmao Tim is a comedic genius
I love Pitzmans mustard, and I'm very happy to see a real Celebrity and inspiration in my life uses it too. Thanks Tim, your French onion dip was a huge success at my step son's half birthday party!
you can only give 25% fucks at that party :(
@@siunlee Put some Pitzmans on that party, and I bet you can get up 28%
You're a great step-peppers!
I died when it hit his shirt! "It comes right off, it's just mustard" Comedy gold this is. I like at 3:21 where Tim had to hold back the laughter
+Cana Dude that line got me too
That's my fave part
"Get this ready for Super Bowl Sunday whenever that is..."
Posted July 1st
I love how nobody is supportive of Tim's random foray into a televised cooking show but for some reason he is dead set on doing it.
At 2:50 he says " comes right off it's just mustard". Just mustard? No this is not "just mustard", this is Pitzman's mustard.
Pissman's mustard
Pitzman's mustard, now reformulated with yellow dye for extra staining potential!
Fuck your piss mustard!
@@tranquilrabies LOL! How are you? "NOT GOOD!"
Thank you for sticking up for Pitzman’s
I love how positive the Tim and Eric comment section is
It's refreshing.
These guys are geniuses at taking 1 gag making it a bunch of episodes and making everyone of them funny.
Tim is such a good actor that he makes me feel sorry for the negative reaction he says this is getting
I heard that Pitzman's Mustard is really good for your skin texture, so I started filling latex gloves with mustard and wearing them in my sleep.
Only problem is, I've developed this really weird rash and everyone is complaining I smell like raccoon urine. I don't think I'm using enough. Should I start applying it to my face, too?
+missiletoe99 No, go straight for where your glands are. As a trained doctor I suggest applying evenly to your groin and seeing if it improves the issue.
- Dr Mogel, chef professor at Pitzman's Mustard
+missiletoe99 Have you tried removing your teeth?
+Kayomn I did, and now doctors are telling me they've never seen anything like it when they look at my groin. I feel so unique! Thank you Pitzman's!
+Nullll1111 Of course. Everyone tells me I have such a nice set of pearls in my mouth, but those are dentures. Didn't hurt a bit when they pulled my teeth out.
yo;u're wrong
@@Nullllus lolz
This is so relaxing. I use this as a way to fall asleep at night.
Shaka
Underrated comment
The intro makes me unironically nostalgic for when HD TV first got big 2005-2006 and every show started like that.
2:54 - That's a good tip. Mustard has never been known to stain.
Been looking for deluge98 for a good 10 minutes now
kumis91
3 years ago
if anyone is wondering deluge98's comment said "Tim's mother loves it when i make her climax.. ;-) "
Olis Blackmore He’s gone. Probably got bullied.
I think he changed his username
"i almost feel like a modern art painter"
how did i miss that line when i first watched this? god DAMNIT tim.
In all seriousness...this is legitimately how you make good French onion dip. Obviously, you don't squirt half a bottle of mustard in the mix. Just a little squirt adds a tangy kick to it, though.
You are now informed. Use this information for the good of mankind.
The Raddest Chad Great, now it's not a secret anymore! Thanks, Chad.
No
I'll be using this information for the bad of mankind.Thanks!
The Pissman's really wakens the flavors!
I love how mustard just comes right out.
i love how they turn the music off when he stirs
5:26 they actually break character here 🤣 Look at Tim's face
I love how Tim is so into the sauces he goes into a full on trance when "mixing"
I love watching Tim keep his shit together. He's doing everything that he can while slowly giving up. Mwah!
_You were telling me something about the water pressure in your house or something I always thought that was interesting_
I first watched this video when it came out 7 years ago. I was 10 at the time and my older brother introduced me to Tim and Eric with this series. I really couldn’t tell at the time what was so funny about it, but I always died of laughter and often come back for a dose of nostalgia.
Holy crap, Tim actually cuts things properly. He actually knows how to use a knife.
I can't wait to try these new tips at my upcoming family gathering! I'll be the talk of my nephew's funeral!
relieved to see that 8 years later, drunk, i had already liked this video
Relatable.
brit this is our only chance 2 b friends with the ultimates lets get it theyre our truest friends that we got
Hey Tim, could you please explain what was going on with that "Abso LUTEly" clip? I understand it features your dad summing up a trip in 2 words, but ... I don't get it.
Brendan Harris That's the point I believe.
PradaHollistarOnline That was a rather vague and indirect statement on your part, don't you think? What, exactly, do you mean?
Brendan Harris Ok, let me try again.
You. Aren't. Supposed. To. Get. It. Is that better?
"I have sewer water going into my house right now....and who knows where the cats are?"
Tim: "time to start mixing it all together"
*jazz music stops*
Pitzman's Mustard: Ruining friendships since 1832.
Hey Tim, this was an excellent episode! I made this dip with your secret ingredient, and everybody loved it! They said it was terrible and spat it out, and I even lost some friends, but I know that they are just super jealous of my awesome cooking skills. If only they knew.
These guys are fucking genius. Just their attitudes and mannerisms alone are hilarious
Haha this is so much more subtle than I'm used to seeing from T&E. I really enjoy it.
FOR REAL!!!!! UH Oh does that mean the end of the world is NEAR????? O.O xD
Qué?
I like to imagine they are storing all their emotions in a side of their brains to allow themselves to be so awkward. And they spend all their time off camera laughing explosively.
watching this helps with my constipation
“It’ll come right out, it’s just mustard.”
Mustard being one of the hardest stains to remove.
My favorite part of these that I never thought about is the fact that he REFUSES to just make recipes that actually use mustard
Thank you Tim! I served this dip tableside at my Super Bowl Sunday party, whenever that's coming up, and it turned out great!
tim is arguably the funniest person alive
Tim’s genius signature response: look away - eyebrows raise - tilt head - half smirk - hold - insert “cliche tag line.” So damn funny! #spaget!
When the video starts and the music plays I immediately start laughing 😂 just the pure fact of knowing what you're in for 😂
Pitzman's! I've been using it since 1994. The best. The only mustard.
I like this so much. I think it's far more subtle than their normal comedy, which is in some ways nice. It really refines their style.
every time he knocks stuff out of the bowl while mixing gets me laughing so hard, and i cannot explain why
Made this for my big party last night. The guests loved it, and the Pitzman's really brought out the flavor! Thanks for the great recipe, Tim
I hope Tim is well. Love you Tim
This is just so unbelievably cold, love it
Wow way to turn it around! Almost nine years later and no dislikes!
Did they find the cats? Please update me.
they just found them
@@siugbait oh thank heavens!
They died and are burning in hell with Hitler, Stalin and Jesus.
Yes the cat's are fine!! Here's a picture of those cutties
C:/Users/Owner/Pictures/photo's/cat/New Folder/peppep-n-cookie.jpeg
@@privateprofile9659 ahh yes, my photo's folder is also in my Pictures folder
Honestly love that he's adding cream based dips into the rotation
Whether or not Tim Heidecker will be remembered as a George Carlin of comedy or not, he makes me cry laughing every single time. Brilliant.
I'm happy that the forces of life brought Tim and Eric together to wig us out. Just think, we lived in the same time frame as these two artists, out of all the billions of hours in the universe past and future
I love how on this cooking show he only makes sauces
I have learned so, so much. I made this and it’s indeed very good with carrot. The Pitzman really brings out the onion.
Also, who the hell downvotes this?
My message to the haters is no one cares no one’s listening
I’ve always known he’s joking when he says he has had a lot of negative feedback… but every time I watch this, I get sad at the thought that Tim is being told his sauces suck 😔 Tim, I love your dips
tim hey it's me again
I just made this sauce hoping to apologize to my family for the bruncheon incident. i invited my boss to enjoy superbowl sunday with some special onion dip and everyone hated it. my son and pepep both got sick from it, then my boss looked at me in the eyes and said "ya blew it" then stomped out of my house, but not before making an indecent pass at my wife.
i thought my mistake last time was not using Pissman's mustard, but i made sure to track down a bottle (I had to buy one from a captain of a chinese shark fishing boat) but it still didn't make a difference. What did I do wrong?
Dj Garcia well that explains why the sticker on my mustard was different than the one tim uses. it looks like tim's mustard has a lovely drawing of a colonial house, and mine has a picture of a man sitting in an electric chair. I hate getting sucked into getting knockoffs of otherwise celebrated brands.
thank you for the heads up, I'll try harder to find some Pitzman's mustard this time. Maybe my family will love me again when I whip up a special sauce with genuine Pitzman's™ Mustard. i'll never trust a chinese shark fisher again.
Lol i thought you were serious when you commented on the first episode.
Adam Hawrysiak he is serious
Why is this so tragic and beautiful at the same time? Good job!
Titanium I lost my shit laughing when I read the label with the guy in the electric chair. Genius.
The way he keeps furiously stirring with a casual expression on as face as globs of mustard dip splatter his shirt will forever be hilarious to me.
Tim, I don't know if you read these but I have to thank you. These tips are saving my marriage. She keeps saying that she can't figure out why my dips taste so good now. *psst* it's Pissmans. I won't tell if you dont. ;)
eric walking out yelling fuck is the best thing i have ever seen
I am so glad you did this Tim. Honestly, I really was wondering how to make French onion dip for the longest time. Watching this was so much easier than asking a chef or something
I love how he's absolutely determined to overmix the hell out of everything hahaha
something about this guy mixing sauce is fucking hiliarious. in every episode.
Ikr
I just made this sauce for my PepPep and he really enjoyed it. Thanks Tim, Great Job!
Hey Tom, long time fan of Tam's Kitchen here (my 3th year anniversary of watching your cookermen show!) and just wanted to let y'know that you've still got us goons out here laying down some positive vibes your way! Rock on Trim!
You had it right the first time. It's Tom.
I gotta say. I came here thinking this series was a joke, but by god it's not. This is my new favorite cooking show.
Love how he dips half of the carrot says its really nice...then proceed to eat rest of the carrot without diping it :D
Lol
You don't want to be a nasty double dipper, he did it to be polite.
@@botdfbvb You guys are absolutely right :D honestly I don't know what I was thinking 6 years ago, it had to be lapse in judgement you have to understand!
Tim and Eric you guys are hilarious! If every episode of awesome show was online and shown on youtube more people would know how briliant you guys are.
and who knows where the cats are...
Delicious side tip, and there's a juicy consistency in Tim's wooden spoon to bowl ratio. 10 popcorns and 2 drips of mustard
Normally, Tim and Eric annoy the Pissman’s out of me, but these kitchen episodes really crack me up.
The ASMR on this is off the charts. Great job!
To everyone that truly gets this kind of humor,
I appreciate you more than you know.
The rest of you I feel sorry for.
Baby i love you
im glad they removed down thumbs tim. the haters went overboard you made a real good episode and your ketchup mustard sauce was legitimately gormet.
"Because I got...I have sewer water going into my house right now, and who knows where the cats are."
"No one cares, no one's listening" Your voices are unheard. HAHAHA That's me every day.
Awesome show! Haven't laughed this much in ages.
I love how the different consistencies of the sauces cause Tim to have to take a few seconds to find the funniest way of mixing.
How do these things get past me for so long, I'm just coming across this.
Dude, I found this only after~7 years :D Imagine how many ppl who wrote comments on this video is no longer with us :O
You know that these guys have a gift when they can turn someone getting kind of annoyed and inconvenienced into comedy gold.