6 Tips to Find a Christian Husband/Wife From How I Met, Dated, and Married Bethany
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 ก.พ. 2018
- AGW University: Relationship Training for Christian Singles: agwuniversity.teachable.com/
(My Newest Book) The One: How to Know and Trust God’s Sovereign Plan for Your Future Marriage www.amazon.com/One-Trust-Sove...
Here are 6 tips from how God brought Bethany and I together that may help you find a Christian spouse.
1. God Prepared Me for Marriage By Teaching Me to Serve People, Not Just Pretty Girls.
2. When You Actively Serve God in Tangible Ways, You Will Meet Other People You Enjoy.
3. Friendship Is a Great Foundation for a Dating Relationship.
4. God Will Never Remove All the Risk and Will Never Give You All the Answers When It Comes to Relationships.
5. Difficulties in Dating Are Not a Sign You Are Not Meant to Be Together.
6. Perfectionism Kills Your Joy. Love Is Messy. But It’s Worth It.
(Book) The Ultimate Guide to Christian Singleness www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Guide...
FREE eBook: The Ultimate Guide to Christian Singleness: applygodsword.com/christian-si...
Paperback books and small group Bible studies by Mark Ballenger:
Intertwined: Our Happiness Is Tied to God’s Glory www.amazon.com/Intertwined-Ha...
Redeemed Like David: How to Overcome Sexual Temptation www.amazon.com/Redeemed-Like-...
Never Quit: A 5 Week Small Group Bible Study on the Power of Prayer www.amazon.com/dp/1979772673/
Basic Transformation: A Small Group Bible Study on the Basics of Christianity and Transformation www.amazon.com/dp/197959063X/
Social Media and Contact Info:
Facebook: / applygodsword
Twitter: / apply_godsword
Email: markballenger@applyGodsword.com
Website: applygodsword.com/
"Perfection kills love." If you're looking and expecting perfection from a human relationship, you will squelch the relationship and the opportunities to show love.
Even though I'm atheist but i still love respect and follow bible and lord jesus is really inspiring. And I'd like to be Christian oneday
Sounds like it's time to open the door for Him... because i never heard an atheist saying that he hopes to become a christian one day. God bless!
@@francoisea.1713 🙂
Go for it, sooner the better. Jesus said, "seek and you shall find"...(in the context of seeking God) .it's a promise, take him up on his faithfulness. I did 4 years ago, and don't regret it!
Jesus loves you Saran!! Praying for you!
No better time to become a Christian than today! I pray the Lord opens your heart very soon!
When you said you asked her friend not to tell you anything about Bethany because you wanted to take the risk and ask her without already knowing her answer, I melted. That was not only decent, but also way too mature for a 20 year old. Each time I watch your videos, my respect and admiration for you grow. Congratulations on your 10th year of marriage, may God keep blessing you and Bethany with happinness
Thank you Helia, we appreciate that!
“Where can you find a good man/woman? Good people are out there doing good things.” Man! Some serious wisdom right there! God has given you the gift of wisdom. I’m glad you’re making the most of it & sharing it with us.
...you shall know them by their fruits
I had been in a homeless ministry serving and met a few potential girlfriends who I could eventually marry, but it didn't work out.
I served in that ministry for nine years.
I am still single and single at 61, never married.
I was a biker before I was saved, so I am using this now as a point of service for the Lord.
I wear a white cross on my back and share the gospel everywhere I ride.
Hopefully... soon, God will bless me with a lovely lady with the same calling.
Congratulations 🎉 to 10 years of marriage...what a beautiful blessing...
Thank you! That is very kind of you :) God bless!
Thank you for sharing.
👍
Very informative video. A few things I didn't know. Thank you for sharing.
- Love is a risk.
- We can only find perfection in Jesus, not on our spouse.
- God won't always give us the answers, so we have to give it a shot, even expecting to get disappointed.
- Problems and disagreements don't necessarily mean that the relationship is not from God.
Again Mark thank you. This information will be useful for when the time comes for me to meet the lady God has for me.
I'm so glad this was useful to you! God bless!
I just recently became single because I was not dating a Godly man. I had to end it , it just was not going to work out longterm. Ladies and fellas dont waste your time with an ungodly person. This video was truly inspiring. Thank you, and God bless.
Amen
Amen🙏
I wish you could echo this loud and clear to others who think it will work... Darkness and light can't mix
@nicolareynolds6467 To this day, I'm still single and waiting for God's will.
@@andreakimmy971 that makes 2 of us my dear... I won't jump into anything without the Lord leading. Too much madness happening in relationships these days
Any chance your wife can make videos like this from a lady's point of view? That'd be great!
We have some videos in mind :) coming soon hopefully :)
Awesome! I'll be looking forward to that if so, thank you!
ApplyGodsWord.com/Mark Ballenger same channel ??! Yay! I’m looking forward to it
@@ApplyGodsWordcomMarkBallenger Did your wife do a vid of her side of the story?? I'd love to know her perspective 😊
Yh that would be great
I was born in Liberia, Africa. My parents adopted my brother and me brought in Iowa, America. They taught me about Jesus Christ dead for our sins. He raises from death. I enjoyed watching your video. God bless your family.
Wow, that is so cool. I love Liberia and I hope to return one day. Despite all the problems, it is still a beautiful country
"The good people are out there doing good things". Well said.
“I have to learn how to serve first before I get into a relationship” amen brother
You are the best I've heard and I'm 60 years old! I'm believing God for a husband. You are right on target. Thank you!
Thanks Darlene Holloway, that's a great encouragement to me :)
Hello Darlene. My name is Charles. I live in California. Nice to meet you.
@Angel Diamond Star yes she is really beutiful
@Angel Diamond Star ......hahaha u Love everyone i guess...God loves you so very much
I agree! I’m 51 and enjoy and agree with your videos.
“Can’t have hidden motives”. Love that.
Amen!
19:20 Dude, you were so smart at 20, that is incredible. You told her friend not to tell you anything. Man, so much respect for how you handled that. I wish I could have been that smart when I was 20, wasted so much time living a life of sin following temptation. God found me though after he showed me everything I was running after was hollow. I believe that with my faith in him, that he will make up for lost time. Blessings to you and Bethany and thank you for these videos. You're helping me a lot!
"Real love always requires risk. Love deepens w more vulnerability they have w each other" WOW.
"I didn't want to ask her out because I know she would say yes, that's weak, that's lame" YOU GET EM TIGER HECK YES truest statement Ive heard come out of a mans mouth
😂👍
Great tips. I live in Spain now and there are even less believers here than in the US. I'm also almost 35 and I sometimes feel like all the Christian men are already married...
Emily Flowers, i can see how you would feel like that. My advice is to be very proactive next time you meet a Christian guy you are interested in. Ask him out to dinner and then see if he pursues you from there. If the choices are limited you don't want to let one pass you by. I'm not saying chase a guy but let him know you are interested and then see if makes a move
Yeah, true. Thanks.
Emily Flowers sure :)
Dear Emily...you are not alone. As a 39 year old male living in the Mid-Atlantic region of the US we too have the same problem here. Hardly any Christians...and it seems all the Christian women are married at 22 and they usually marry someone they grew up with. We are in End times.. life as a Christian is hard now ..maybe harder then ever before. Stay strong ! You were chosen for this time period..as were I. We must confront these struggles head on. This life is a spiritual war.. and you are a soldier ! Never forget that !!!
That's a lie. The enemy always wants to make you think that your situation is unique. I'm 38 and confident I will get someone
I’ve been watching you since I was 20. I’m 21 now and I love your videos. You never over complicate the gospel I love you and Girl Defined. Thank you for all you do
So glad you are enjoying the channel! Thanks for the encouragement!
Such an awesome video! Very encouraging to me as a single Christian! Thank you for sharing your story!
Amen, that's my hope for this video! Glad it was encouraging and thanks for sending your encouragement back to me :)
Bless you, brother.
Bless you Bethany.
Bless your marriage.
I love how you articulate your knowledge and interpretation of the bible so effortlessly. I admire your insight and patience when you met your wife💖🙏Greetings from the African continent 🇿🇦
You're hitting it out the park with these videos Mark!!! Please keep'em coming sir!!! Thanks!!!
That's great to hear, glad they have been helpful. And thanks for your encouragement! God bless :)
'Everybody is looking for the perfect one because we are all looking for Jesus' that was Good! So true! you have no idea how much your videos have been helping me, thank you so much for making them, I just discovered your channel and what a blessing! Thank you! God bless!
Greetings I have just seen the above post, and felt inspired to share a little of my brothers testimony. I born to Jamaican parents in London England of the UK. My brother who is one year younger than me, born in 1964 got married at the age of 20 to his wife who is 8 years older than him. He now pastors in a church I grew up in in North London of the United Kingdom.
He knows the Lord had told him to marry his wife and he went through a lot through doing so as she is older than him but they got married in April 1984 and are still together. They have two daughters and how I have to say God be praised.
I was greatly encouraged by your testimony. PeaceB 😊🙏🏽
Really good points you made in your story! It was quite similar for me. I met my husband after I stopped pursuing men and started pursuing God. My husband is from Colorado and I'm from Ohio, but we met in Charlotte North Carolina because we were both pursuing Ministry in Charlotte North Carolina. So I totally agree that if you want to find a Godly spouse, you need to find yourself active in The Godly community and not necessarily pursuing a spouse, but pursuing God.
We also were friends first and dated for a long time in order to establish a really good foundation for the marriage instead of just jumping into it right away. This is so important.
This is Absolutely Biblical Sound Wisdom. I have No idea where the thumbs down came from (has to be those who are blinded sadly). But this is an Amazing personal experience. I know none of us should expect the same experience, but the wisdom and steps make perfect Sense. Totally loved what you said about " where are all the good men, they're Serving, doing good things!"
Yes, I resonate with that statement too. Good people are out doing good things :) Thanks for sharing!
-Mark
Wow...I love your story! Very helpful video.
And you're right: one person's experience/results in anything isn't a formula for the next person.
Liberia!! So you know our neck of the woods...
I hope you truly enjoyed your time in West Africa.
L. Patrick yes, I loved my time in Liberia and hope to return one day God willing.
He has special and interesting testimonials that is & will continue to help & bless so many believers of all ages; his down to earth style of speaking is a joy to hear.
Oh the feels; the girl that I like is named Bethany too (I talked about her in one of your vids), but she already has a boyfriend, yet I feel God telling me to continue praying for her and her family because I feel a sense of peace every time I do it. I am not actively hoping for them to break up (though as a fallible human being, I do so in the deepest recesses of my mind/heart) because I regard people who are dating as if they're already married, and one must not covet the wife of another. Also, I am aware that doing that would be selfish because it means I am more interested in my own well-being instead of hers by wanting her to experience the heartache of a break-up just so that I can have the chance to win her. The strangest thing is that I barely know anything about her, even though she's my mom's goddaughter (and her mom is my godmother) yet my level of care falls in the category of 'falling in love' instead of 'infatuation', according to my extensive research online. Please Mark, if you have any insight, feel free to share.
To add, every time I forcibly try to let go, everything falls in disarray spiritually, mentally and emotionally. I just find it odd that God would want me to remain in same level of care that I did before I found out she's already taken when in such circumstance He usually closes the door and tells us to move on. My mind (maybe Spirit too? I can't tell I'm afraid) tells me "Perhaps it's to further develop your level of maturity by practicing love in its purest form: selfless and more concerned with the well-being of the other".
Kiano Uy there's nothing wrong with liking a girl you don't know too well, it just becomes a problem when you start delaying pursuing other people who God may be leading you to pursue who are available. In other words, I wouldn't put your life on hold for her. Keep moving forward with God and he will make it clear in time
I'm definitely open to others Mark, but I'm treading very cautiously in order to avoid making impulsive decisions.
Kiano Uy smart
Amen! Thank you for all the video's you post and that they are spoken in love and truth of God's word. They have have vey encouraging and up lifting. Congratulations to you and Bethany in 10 yrs of marriage, may God continue to use you both and bless you. Thank you again! I'm praying to be married soon, Amen! God bless you always. Until, Roxanna
Roxanna Barela thanks so much and I'm so glad this was helpful. I pray God continues to lead and guide and make clear the paths he wants you to walk. God bless!
I think the advice about finding people through service has wisdom to it but I more applicable to young people. At the age of 42 my contemporaries have family responsibilities and have reached a point of responsibility in their careers. They aren't on boats in Liberia! A lot of middle aged and older single Christians experience loneliness even though they are often expected to provide a disproportionate level of service.
Eve, if you are believer in Jesus, you do not need to go by the norms of what should happen to you by what age and all that. Have you believed on the God who gave Abraham a child as a centenarian? Not a very regular age to be getting babies. He should have been a great grandfather many times over. "Look to Abraham, your father, and to Sarah, who gave you birth. When I called him he was only one man, and I blessed him and made him many, Isaiah 51:2". This does't mean you look to him like God, but look at his example. He is the father of those who believe. God is now limited by age, or is he? If 62 is the age to give you a fulfilling marriage, that will bring him Glory, who are we to talk back God, Paul asks (perhaps say, that will be too late) Not our will but his will. For me I love the adventure that is following God.
Rightly divide the word. If the word does not apply to you. No need to complain. Fish for water, cat for land. This young man was sent to the people God called him. Now that just may not be you.
Thank you for your comment. I e.pathize with you and hear your heart. May God bring real solutions to transform any lonliness. He loves you.
Eve I 55 and single. It took me forever to come to a point where I was ok not being married despite meeting two men whom I thought would be my spouse. God has really got me to think differently about time. God once told me "I can give you more in a few years than many have in 30". My parents were married for 46 years. Most of it was a struggle. I'm ok not having a husband. I need a deep purpose living for God and carrying out his will for my life. May God richly bless you and give you peace. Acts 13:36
@@overcomer4226 Good for you. I haven't had the same path and I don't feel the same.
I'm nearly 63 & I've still haven't found or met that special man that truely loves me. Nobody wants me because I have a leaning disability & mental health issues, the second one is because of school.
I hope you are doing well and have some good friends. Life is not always easy. God bless
This is a wonderful love story! This gives me hope. Thanks for sharing!
Christeenia Lee so glad it was helpful :)
it is so important what you are doing on this channel. Young people really need this kind of wise advice. Please keep making videos. Even though I am already married is still helpful for me in my marriage and I'm sure helpful to a lot of others.
Woowww! 🙌🏻 "Im not going to take Risk out of the equation, love is a Risk" That spoke to me! Thanks for the video!
Congratulations Mark !
Blessings to you and your family always .
You are blessed 🙏
Thank you for making your ebook free on your website! I can't wait to start reading it tomorrow! Bless both you & your wife! May God bless your family too.
Such an amazing story about how you got together! So inspiring!!
Thanks for sharing.
Unaddressed fear of rejection is a wrecking ball to a relationship 😞
Oh my gosh thank you for being so open to us - you’ve really given me a taste of how God works and have given some insights as to relationships in general. Thank you so much!
"Love is always a risk". Needed this advice. God bless :) :)
What a blessing! This gives me so much perspective! Thanks for sharing!
I was hoping you would make a video like this -thanks for sharing your story!
Im almost 60 years old. I wish I could have known and believed in all this 30 years ago
I'm sixty too, Mark. Thank you for sharing the moving story of you and Bethany and your journey together into marriage.
Great video Mark. Everyone needs to watch this!!
Thanks Connor!
I have been abord the Anastasia. The Anastasia was in Faroe I slands at one point. Me and my brother and my cousin were onboard and saw people who were willing to pay money to be abord the ship.Be strong and of a good courage. fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is tnat doet go with thee: he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.
.
This is a great video. Definitely saving it. This was so clear and eye opening. Thank you. God bless brother.
Thank you for sharing your story!! GOD Bless !
Lauraç Baier my pleasure and God bless:)
Really appreciate the authenticity and realness of it all. Life lessons actually that you have picked up through the process. Definitely has made you evolve as a person.
Who in their right mind would put a thumbs down on this video?! People are ridiculous!! This is a Christian video. If people don't believe in Christian way of meeting the opposite sex, then don't watch this video!
Thank you. Truely you have taught me so much. I’m a young teen girl but I’ve been called to mature myself and you have really helped me. Thank you.
God loves you.
This was very helpful Mark, thank you!!
Hey Mark! I must say, this was by far the BEST video I’ve seen on this topic. And I LOVED the quote at the beginning! I’m so used to other Christians who share their story making us feel like there’s a formula to the way God is going to do something. I appreciate your tips and will subscribe to view more videos as time permits! God bless you and Bethany! 🙏🏽❤️
So glad you enjoyed this video Shan! I agree, much advice out there turns everything into a formula that is not biblical. I hope the AGW channel continues to bless you :)
Wow! This was very good! I love the story of how you met your wife. You make some very helpful relationship points in this video.TY and God bless! ☺️
Awesome! Thank you Mark-great advise☺
Rose Morales you are welcome and God bless :)
Mark,thank you so much for sharing your story!! My respect for you continues to grow!! I love it when young people are wise. I don't see much godly wisdom in my age group...I'm 61.
May the Lord continue to bless you and your precious family richly!!
You are so blessed to have met your wife at 19
Great story of you and your wife. Love you both!!. God bless you and your ministry 🙏❤️🇬🇧
That's a beautiful testimony. It gave me a lot of encouragement. God bless you both 😊
I’m so Bless in this video 🙏🏼
Mark thankyou!!! Very Helpful!!🙏🏾🙏🏾❤
Thanks so much for sharing and encouraging! !!
Taria Usher my pleasure! Glad it was helpful :)
What a great quote to open with!! Thanks!
So blessed by your message.. learnt soo much... thank you.. God bless you
Thank you. Amazing video 💕
Love when you said you had to learn some things first in the relationship!!!
I'm glad u made this video.. After all the vids about two people coming together I've watched, I've always wondered God brought u two got together... Awesome!
Awesome vid my man! 🙏🏿
Thank you for sharing your personal story! It is an incredible one!!
Thank you for sharing.....this helped me allot especially tonight. This has cleared up many things in my mind.
Brenda Izaguirre, glad to hear this, grateful that God used this :)
Love this! 🦋 "You know where all the Good People are? The Good People are out there doing good things. That's where all the Good People are" LOL idk why that was so funny 🤣🌹✨🤍
Your videos completely changed my perception. Thanks so much
I grew up in Mercy Ships!!! That’s so amazing!!!!
Thanks for sharing! Good stuff!
Lgirl 2011 you are welcome!
Thank you for your testimony!
I think this is one of your best videos.
So good and heartfelt, thanks for sharing 😁💯🙏
My pleasure!
Great job A-MEN!!!!! Bravo
Great advice!😊
I’d like to try this direction...👍🏾
Thanks for sharing your personal story and experience! It was really great 👍🏻 God bless. Pray for singles who constantly watching your videos)
Thank you so much Mark 🙏🏻 really helpful for me!
Hey Mark! Thanks for your videos.
I watched this one twice. I think sometimes when teaching, it's good to "Tell them what you're going to say [introduce topic]; then tell it to them; then tell them what you said [review/summarize]." Since I like taking notes, I hope you don't mind that I went ahead and typed a summary of your teaching. Please feel free to correct any errors I made or add anything that I missed! thanks This is what I heard:
(Preface) "Never try to make your own experience a principle for others..."--O.C. "Your story is going to be different."
1st Tip: SERVICE: "God was teaching me how to have a servant mind". Treat all girls and people with a servant-mind -- dignity and love, regardless of whether they are a dating prospect. "Servant-mindedness is the key to healthy relationships." Being a servant is "attractive to other Christians". "Work on being a servant."
"When you are serving you will naturally join a community of like-minded Christians..." "Serving is a great way to meet like-minded individuals who are serving Christ..."
2nd Tip: start with FRIENDSHIP: "our relationship started with friendship....Become friends with as many people as you can.... Friendship is one of the best foundations for romance..."
3rd There's nothing wrong with girl giving a hint --"a little signal"-- that you're interested in a guy.
4th tip: "LOVE IS ALWAYS A RISK": God is "not going to take all the risk out of this. Love is always a risk." God did not tell Mark whether relationship would lead to marriage or if marriage would be successful. "Real love requires risk". You have to be vulnerable. "You're going to have to risk." "Love is never safe."
5th Tip: CONFLICTS: We had "fights" and "disagreements." "Don't think that difficulties mean that God isn't blessing your relationship" or "that this dating relationship isn't meant to be."
6th Tip "Perfectionism kills relationships." God is the only perfect One. Your wife cannot be the perfect One.
Omg! I’m half Liberian! Love your videos!
I was literally in tears watching this video. Such a beautiful love story. You’re right, Love is always a risk. That’s how you know it’s real.
Wow.Thanks for the video! Thinking about how love is always a risk and how love can be "messy" and not perfect. :)
So true
Thank you so much! Your videos have always been helpful, and I have grown a lot in my walk with the Lord and my understanding of how He works to bring two people together. God writes the best love stories, and yours is very unique and inspirational. Keep the videos coming!
I appreciate all your videos Mark. Thanks for your heart for others, love for God's word, and wisdom. Trusting God's leading in this area.
Thank you for this video. So full of wisdom & encouragement.
Great and wholesome story. You both are very blessed.
Beautiful story and I especially like the comment about hard times. Thankyou 💜
Hey Mark I'm really liking your TH-cam channel I think it's really great to see good role models online for other Christians to follow and I really like your godly wisdom and practical advice
Keep up the good work...also your kid telling you it's ok if you talk to yourself haha so cute!
Mary Swenson hahaha, I'm glad you saw that video, I really must have looked like a crazy person to him just talking in a room by myself, but his acceptance of me was great hahahaha
Thank you so much for these messages, I learn to take a break from seeking a special someone and just focusing on serving! Thank you so much!
Wow Mark. What a brilliant story. You'll be telling that story to your children and grandchildren till your dying day. You'll put Mills & Boon out of business too. So many points of interest that I can connect with. Many thanks Mark. Long life and happiness to you both.
Great video.
13:50 man I feel the same way but I gotta trust God! You are truly blessed when you actually get to marry your friend
Wow, amazing story 😊, learned a lot from this
This video has answered so many of my questions. Thank you for sharing your story.
I'm so glad it was relevant for you!
Oh, that narrative is so adorable! Mark, your insecurities and your thoughts were so cute! Could you and Bethany do a "He Said, She Said" format where she can do rebuttals of your thoughts? Or, like a Lizzie McGuiere format? On your anniversary launch of this channel? Or wedding anniversary? Please, please?
Would also love to know what she thought about being older than you. And maybe a video on what Bible says of "older female younger guy" couples, the unique challenges of this type of set up, and how those biblical couples handled it?
Praise the lord ...thank u mark for sharing ur story and the encouragment for taking risk and believing in lord..may god bless u nd ur family.
Powerful truth. I can't believe I didn't see it!