I once had a crush on a choir director so did all the other women in the church he was a widowed handsome man he played the piano like nobody else could he sang Christian songs and even preached at times in place of our pastor. he was always friendly at the door is people were leaving and he would shake my hand reel tight look in my eyes and say it was so good to see you today and I thought he liked me the way he shook my hand with meaningful gesture being a very shy and humble person I am and I considered myself at least attractive I had confidence in myself in that way so I was bold enough to ask him if he would like to take the opportunity to go to a concert with me I had two free tickets. he suddenly said he was sorry that I should just ask somebody else in place of him. oh my goodness that was such a let-down I was never so embarrassed. I guess my crush just went right down the tubes. so I decided never to try to date someone at church. I believe men and women want to meet a good Christian values person of worth and it's very difficult to cross that line at church. so how is someone to meet someone if they are Christians and can't find the right person at church. I later knew that God was protecting me. I found out he was having an affair with a married woman. never put any man or woman on a pedestal until you really know who they are the only one that should be on a pedestal is Jesus Christ he is perfect
Don't base everything on that one man. Doesn't mean a thing. Don't be afraid to speak up the next time. A man that likes you will appreciate you speaking with him.
I think Isaac and Rebecca give us a great tip about how a woman should approach a man. In the Bible you don't see Rebecca going after any man. She wasn't anxious about that, she was just working and the blessing came to her. I think trusting God is the key to get the right guy for a Cristian woman! Great video!
Simply follow the Holy Spirit rather than your feelings. He'll convict you of what you should or should not do. Because if the desire you have for someone comes from the Lord, the Lord will do the work. What I mean here is you don't have to appear desperate because Abba will provide a way. It won't bother you if that person likes someone else. Because your security comes from the Lord. He is enough, our bridegroom, and our everything.
Thanks for this but.I feel like I got this too late.I felt like a friend of mine was the right person for me but felt he was taking too long to commit so I asked him about his intentions at different point in time and even admitted that I was getting too attached to him .I feel like I was too forward instead of letting the Spirit of lead.now he is acting distant. I feel so vulnerable and embarrassed and feel like I should just let go to save myself further embarrassment 🥹
@@olusabigail9975Your friend is not a good friend for being distant. Everyone seems to be unaware or forgetful of the fact that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ, first and foremost. We should still be there for one another regardless of our feelings. The truth of Scripture trumps/overrides any feeling la each party has towards the other. We are to be sacrificial in all our ways.
I agree that men should do the pursuing. But ladies, telling men they need to "man up" and "step up" will absolutely not help. Instead of assuming the worst - that we are cowards and weaklings - please try to understand that we are just as fallen, broken and in need of understanding as you. We need grace as much as you. And grace is really attractive.
Do ladies want to know why I dont step up its because Im not interested. I am 32 in my life I have only asked out 4 people all were Nos of course but i remember them clearly because it was from the heart. I need to feel in my heart and my soul that the person is worth the time and effort that we would get along well and be the bestest of friends
1. Talks to them a lot more than you talk to other people. 2. Encourage them. 3. Use the power of invitation. Invite him to spend more time with you but not in an obvious way. 😂 1. Don't tell him directly but giving him signs how you feel about him.
YES, YES, YES and once again: YES! I’m a christian guy (27, freshly and happy dating) and I approve every part point of that advice 👍 1. I do get suspicious, that a girl likes me, when she takes her time to talk to me. 2. Any honest (important) positive comments on my skills were more worth that ANY thing, she could else do for me. (Don’t get discouraged by guys possibly awkward response to your compliment, neither push it to strong, just let him know, that you like the way he does stuff). I want for my girl & future wife to be the best, to serve her and be appreciated in my ability to navigate the world, grow and reach my goals in a way God helped me to develop over time. That feeling of being respected is iiiiiiiiiiiiiiinvaluable. A very strong fuel. Use with care and honesty:) 3. Inviting a guy to do something for you is an awesome strategy! Win-Win-Win-Win. One thing though: he might just be friendly and not romantically interested, buuuut you might still have great time and a problem solved (or at least partially solved, or at least get a new perspective on the issues, guys lllove to give there perspectives of issues 🙈) and you two might know each over a little bit better, no pressure:) or he might be interested, but just be busy at that time... dunno) just some thoughts of mine. Best of luck, sisters!!!!! Pray for your relationships, be patient, trust your Creator and let Him shape and prepare you for the life he has planed and prepared for you 😌✨ God bless you!! 🌿 !
I really think this thing of a guy who hits on you or shows interest in any way being called "creepy" or stalking you or whatever?, is the thing that has done the MAJORITY of NORMAL women the greatest disservice..: Normal Guys are so concerned about being thought of in that way.. just precisely because they are NOT that way at all... just interested in a woman... PLEASE... Can you overly sensitive women /show off women ; "He's stalking me -"meantime he is just being a real man... how we ( normal women) would like him to be... So ...can you overly sensitive/scared/ traumatised ladies please get some help/therapy... and I can talk... was married to a raging narc for 38 years longer than I care to admit... THE REST OF US WOULD JUST LIKE TO CARRY ON A NORMAL LIFE WITH A BETTER MAN ...
Ruth put her best clothes and perfume on... she put herself in a position whereby Boaz knew that she was available and desired Him as a husband😁👌☺️💕...she then waited to see how he responded...🙏🏻❤️
Ruth pursued Boaz. Ruth PROPOSED marriage to Boaz. That Leverite Marriage deal took 6 to 9 months to carry out, while she pursued him. And this wasn't just an oddball situation because Levirite Marriage was the Law, for everybody. Where does the Bible say a man is to pursue a woman? Don't put words in God's mouth.
@@scottwhitley5542 Ruth didn't pursue him - she invited him to pursue her. Look at Adam and Eve, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, Moses and Zipporah, etc... Biblically, after the man had an evident relationship with God, had a purpose (job or calling), then his wife was led to him. Then, he pursued her.
I would have to agree with you, however, with today’s society with metoo and feminism is just harder to approach. Not only that, women hides their signals more these days with showing their interests. (Not saying you, just in general)
I don't know your heart, but incase you are, or you will... Please don't think playing mind games to excessively keep him chasing is a Godly way either, that's playing mind games, and it will almost always lead to game over, and if not the buttons will be stiff so you won't get very far in the relationship. If a woman is excessively trying to make me chase her beyond what's natural, I'm backing out, unless God told me otherwise. I understand it's natural and I find it cute but when it comes to excessively trying to bend the strings to make him chase you, it will exaust him and you will become selfish, and end up sincerely accusing him of being selfish because you feel neglected, but he isn't actually neglecting you, it's because you probably have wounds of past hurt which God needs to heal, and if you keep that mindset, you'll be insecure throughout your relationship, because when he's unable to you'll be insecure about it. It's covetousness for attention it will hurt your heart, and it means you need to ask God to fill your heart to be the main one you need attention from. I've got some past wounds that need healing to, it's painful.
This is true. I also don't think there's fault in a woman observing a guy she is interested in and genuinely engaging him in conversation as a clue to your interest. Feel him out as to personality etc. This will also illuminate how you can best proceed. Some guys are more reserved and guarded, especially with modern cultural hypersensitivities
My friend had a crush on a guy for years-finally she told him her feelings. They are in a relationship. So while I can see guys’ wanting to “take the lead,” I think sometimes being upfront is refreshing. Ruth is an example for me.
I agree, a man won’t know how someone feels unless they tell them. It won’t hurt just letting them know you’re interested, that’s definitely not too strong or initiating anything.
Thanks Mark, I really needed to hear this. I caught up with a girl, had an amazing time with her. She extended an invite to me the next day which I accepted, and then when I saw her another time I got really nervous and overwhelmed around her and got attacked horribly by the enemy by past hurt in opening my heart up. I just felt in my own head that it was moving so quickly out of nowhere. She even asked me a week beforehand that she wanted to catch up with me, but I was busy at the time, but this planted a seed in my heart and started to think of her more than just a church friend. Now I desire to pursue her by getting to know her more, but not being too direct too quickly, might take a couple of days to pray over this and ask God to give me the capacity to love her as Christ loves me.
As a dude I can verify everything that was said is spot on. If any of this is too complicated, just throw some more smiles his way when you're talking. If he's at all interested in you, thats only gonna make him like you more.
I’m hoping so I surly SMILE every chance I have when bi bump into him.. HE Smiles back and he gives me his full attention... an we both hinted about coffee together sometime and he answered I like that... but nothing had be of it yet... so tell me Johnny, should I just continue going onwards and just forget it.... may he really don’t want to get know one another
I cannot believe how I was out of track before watching this video!😨 I am literally doing all these things with the guys I don't like and completely the opposite towards the guys I like. That's why they never approach even if they seem that they notice me. I can't believe it. Thank a lot for these words of wisdom and advices. God bless you
Thanks for admitting your shortcomings. You being authentic and honest about it is the first step to doing & being better. Keep doing better & you'll get a different result. An honest woman. Very admireable. 💯✔
I truly laughed at the first point because guys love to assume you like them even when you're just being friendly. I actually have to not smile as much when interacting with the opposite sex because I'm generally a friendly person. I even have to temper myself when it comes to encouraging males because it comes naturally to encourage others. Too many men are not pursuing women for fear of rejection.
That fear, any fear I believe are works of the devil. We shouldn’t be fearful and think negatively and dwell on our past rejections and bringing that mindset into our present circumstances . So, we should always remain positive of the possibilities that the person may reconsider accepting you back even if they rejected you the first time. Relationships are a big commitment to handle too.
I'm dying of laughter because I do both 1 & 2!!! I'm in leadership & super social, talkative.. it's the Jesus in me to be social & all that. And I mass texts or write encouraging notes to both guys & gals all the time!!! 🤣🥰🤣🥰
This makes me so happy becuz i was doing all of these points without even knowing it was the right way and he's definitely interested and responding well... we've developed a great steady friendship within romantic interest... iit feels good and led by the Spirit... thanx Mark Ford confirming what the Lord was already doing in my life!
Many people choose someone, they prefer or 'think' might be a good choice and then ask the lord to make it work. Whoever, we end up with, we should be confidant that it was his choice for us, not our own, which is why it is important to receive confirmation from the lord. When we give God the option to choose our spouses, he is mindful of our needs and our expectations as long as they align with his will. The more we understand and accept how much we're loved by God, the easier it gets to patiently wait and trust his timing.
I did the blunt approach once after a few years of confusion. He gave both vibes (friendship and romantic). I needed closure to the confusion. He eventually let me know he was interested but decided he wasn’t interested in me romantically anymore. It was good for me so that I could move on.
Speaking as a man, I assume that if you give a guy an "obvious" hint, and he acts like he doesn't get it, odds are, he knew exactly what you wanted, but he wasn't attracted to you, and he wanted to spare your feelings and avoid a potentially awkward situation by rejecting you outright.
Typically, a man is clear (e.g. verbal, non-verbal, the way he treats other) about what he wants. Thus, he wouldn't show friend vibes to someone who he wants to be romantic with. So, if you perceive this, move on because he's not ready (for whatever reason) to be in an exclusive relationship with you.
Just to add a little bit of a woman's perspective, I sort of was blunt with a guy and told him I liked him (after a few months of back and forth where things were unclear). I do regret being blunt, and as you said, instead of starting a relationship it ended a friendship. But at the same time, I'm kinda glad it ended b/c there was no going back to what it once was, and it helped me to move on. So I think sometimes it's OK for the woman to be blunt and get it out of the way. But that's just my 2 cents. :)
I told his sister (my friend) I liked her brother, and she told him I had feelings for him. He was already showing me signs, and she told him to pursue me if he felt something back and he did :))
Just the fact that you spend YOUR time making these videos to help and lead Christian Men and Women means so much. Your wife is lucky to be married to you and I am sure you feel lucky being married to her! Thank you for your efforts and the time you make for this ministry :) :) South Africa
Yes, but I also recommend either letting things grow like you would with any other friendship in the body, and also spend some times praying about the guy you are interested in and asking God if it his will to open his eyes, in the meantime spending time adoring the Lord and loving others. Because he will be more attracted to the fruit of a godly woman.
Great advice. Would you be open to work on a video for women who are having trouble trusting men from past relationships and, how to gain trust through God's wisdom in a loving acceptable relationship? How to spot men who are truly authentic, non-judgemental. If you have already done this, I will check your videos. Thanks!💛
"But Jesus on his part would not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people 25 and needed no one to testify about anyone; for he himself knew what was in everyone." (John 2:24-25 NRSV). If Jesus didn't trust any then how can we?
I had an interest in a woman who showed all these signs so I sat back and waited to see how things would develop. The more I got to know her the more I saw that she was most likely just being friendly. But it gave me time to get to know here objectively and from that I saw that we were not on the same page as far as Bible knowledge went. As a result, I was able to assess her qualities and move on from pursuing her without any one getting hurt. And her none the wiser. As a result, the Lord has used it to establish me in my purpose to encourage others to grow in the knowledge of God and to be free to go wherever He directs me to go. God will always work good to those who love Him and are called in accordance with His purpose. The ultimate purpose for humans is to have a relationship with God and this far outlasts anything the temporal reality we reside in can offer.
I’m so shy when I like the guy .. I talk to everyone else everyone real easy Except the guy I like !! What to do when shy and liking that one guy I avoid .?:/ but really want to talk to him .
I am having the same issue, we are in the same group so we get to contribute on group level but when it's just the two of us, I get really nervous so I normally have someone join us for a chat but I do text him alot basic things like what our brother is talking on
Just from personal experience here. I am very relationally clueless. I had this girl who I was head over heels for and I always made it a point to talk to her whenever I saw her, but I never really initiated anything because I wasn’t sure how she felt. One day she came in the store with a guy and she was dropping slot of hints and chatting me up, and honestly it felt like she might’ve been flirting. However, seeing this guy she came in with standing next to her I thought she was already seeing this guy and therefore just being friendly with me so I didn’t take any of the bait. I later found out from a sister that this girl did really like me and I went up to her and asked her out, unfortunately by this time she had found someone else and moved on, and I kick myself for that a little more every day. So just a guys advice for the ladies, just because he doesn’t respond doesn’t always mean he’s not interested, he may just be stupid like I am, so take that as you will 😅
In all seriousness. Perfect love cast on fear. I don't think a perfect formula exist for how to start a relationship but if you go to overboard to fast it will scare anyone you like. We are all human get to know the person first and see if it's a good experience or a bad one. Not everything that glitters is gold.
You’ve showed me a different point of view with the pushiness... I truly didn’t knw tht. I’m a very straight blunt person and hate wasting my time. I will take your advice 🤩🤩🤩Thank you and God bless!!!👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Pushiness. Dominating. Strong Character...why does a woman do this? Why are people men or women needy? How do you heal if you have been hurt and you turned around to be the dominating one? You forgive, but your gentleness is about gone out the door like way back?
8:38 beyondish, Dont agree. *HE* WHO FINDS A WIFE FINDS A GOOD THING. If it is Gods will then he will ask us out. It also shows me that this person isnt timid. I need a strong Godly man who can be bold not timid. This world is rough i dont have time for games. Pursing a man *N E V E R* works
it isnt pursuing ..letting a guy know by paying attention to him that youre intrested....until then he isnt probably going to even think to ask you out...yet you never know...lol, would you like to got out:? just saying david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com and be humorous ok Romans 8:28&29
I agree with you Alina, women of God, don't worry about having a guy or no. Because God have plan for us and now, we just focus on our relationship with God until God says it's time. When the time comes, you'll just instantly knew He was the God Chosen one for you. We don't have to go looking or pursuing any man. Because God knows our timing. There's a reason for closed door ❤
This was very good. I'm married, so I technically didn't need it for me, but I have a lot of single friends in church. When I was single, the message I was given was that women had to be 100% passive and just wait to be discovered. This led to a lot of passive-aggressive flirting, instead of the straight-forward signals given in this video. Good work.
Correct, Thank You!! Words and actions too Can be non sexual. We as Christians have this thing so mixed up. The comments confirm why so many are single.😔
@@smokerx6291 I kind of hate that I'm so "flirty" without being sexual..I get told this often 🤨 I smile, give eye contact a lot, laugh, compliment people, but it's just my personality. Ironically, the one person I do have a crush on, I act exactly the same around him as I do other people..the only difference is I try to talk to him more than other people and how nervous, happy and warm I feel 😫😅
So funny, every time I think about a question that I would like to write on here, another one of your videos come up which answers the question I wanted to ask. So no need to ask. So far anyway 😂😂😂 Mark, you are definitely a blessing to a lot of us. I’m sure a lot of women would agree with me on that. Thank you for starting this ministry. God bless you and your family!!! 😊❤️
I've been divorced for quite some time, and have gone on a Christian dating site, but not a lot of good replies or ways to meet via social media I am finding out. So I'm looking forward to hearing more about dating as a single older woman and being found by a quality Christian man in today's society.
If I have a daughter- I’ll definitely warn her to be weary of men who’s concept of masculinity is so fragile it shatters when a women takes the initiative 😂
it's about the long term effects... some men become lazy and spoilt when women do all the pursuing. I've seen it and it can be quite exhausting for women😕 don't set your daughter up for a life like that
@@kannot1 It’s about the long term effects... some women become lazy and spoiled when men do all of the pursuing. I’ve seen it happen too and it can be quit exhausting for men. Don’t set your sons up for a life like that. 😂
Is there childish conversation happening between you two or what? Personally I think the man should pursue the woman. But both parties should show interest😊
I think your videos are wonderful, so well spoken and beneficial for everyone. You are very smart and good, i am a muslim woman and i love watching your videos. God bless you and give u strength
This was extremely helpful. I have done a few of these things. And I was about to make that fatal mistake of telling him, based on advice from 2 young, single ministers. Thank you!!
Hi Fuzzy Mino Kitten, here's a video for introverts th-cam.com/video/1sMwS7A-lXk/w-d-xo.html let me know if you have follow up questions after watching it :) God bless
seriously, it was my first time, but I was kind of dating someone two years ago, and suddenly our friendship faded away and we stopped seeing each other. anyway, nothing happened just we stopped seeing each other. yet i got a dream and heard a voice when i was praying in the chapel in the eucharist chapel, the voice was to be patient. every time i pray about these lovey dovey stuff, i get dreams like crucifix or/and cross or sometimes i see our Virgin mary and they tell me to be patient. every time. i am not kidding..
I am so grateful for your ministry through videos brother in Christ. I will be praying for you and your family as you are helping many! Looking forward to new videos in 2020.
I was in that situation. Our mutual friends tried to set us up and I just said no. I said it a billion times to all my friends...if I'm interested in you, you will know. 😂 I'm make an effort to get to know you and your walk with God. I spend more time with that person in a group settings. But I would say "I'm not currently interested in dating any guys I've meet so far."
Awww.... being in the "friend zone" is not a bad position. I would recommend that if you be the best friend to her that you can possibly be, eventually she will come around. Use that position, out shine the competition. You will win her over! Blessings to You!!!
I've heard from several church people that if a guy really likes you, he will be the one to pursue you. Girls aren't really supposed to do the pursuing. Just curious on what your thoughts are one this.....
In other words, you interpreted what you heard to mean that it is your role to be completely passive and lazy in your relationships, and just wait for the men that you like to read your mind and come over to introduce themselves first. You don't have to act all stand-offish and cold and never speak to anyone unless unless they speak to you first. If you act unfriendly and don't socialize at all, then people will avoid you, because they assume that you are rude, and that you don't like them. Acting cold and overly quiet comes across as unfriendly, and is usually a turn-off for most people. You know, it won't kill you to walk over and introduce yourself to the other people in your church (male or female), instead of just waiting for other people to take the initiative and introduce themselves to you. Even if you have no romantic interest in these guys, they are still your brothers in Christ, and you might as well get to know them, because you will be spending eternity with them in Heaven one day. If you watch the video to the end, I think that he actually answers your question, and gives you his thoughts on girls doing the pursing, and what's appropriate, and what's not.
ThankYou for this video. Im actually asking the Lord to show me his way to proceed with the person im interested in. I'm an introvert but i wil talk to him more and with God's grace, i pray, he wil notice me.
Went to church for the first time since I was a boy in the 90's this past Sunday. So many women stared at me. That was kind of awkward. Then a few women came up to me with big smiles on their faces and just said hi to me and left. It was kinda cute to watch them like get all nervous and watch them hype themselves up and come up to me. I'm curious what my second time going will bring. I don't care for all the singing. I enjoy the preaching though.
Loved the video! We’ve got #1 down! I did #2 today (before I watched the video)! Not sure I’m bold enough for #3. How do you determine if he’s “relationally clueless” vs not interested or maybe just shy and introverted?
Celeste Cummins, I would assume he's not clueless and is just not interested. However, if you become friends or know this person well you may realize he needs help :)
I’m usually too quick to assume that the guy I like wouldn’t be interested and then overcompensate by trying not to interact with him too much 😕 Clearly I’m just shooting myself in the foot! I knew most of these things already but just hearing it from a guy’s perspective helps a lot
This is a great video and oddly completely depicts how my husband and I got together. I gave him all the signs and he responded with interest but he was clueless so I got upset one day because of something he said and another guy he was talking to said come on man she likes you. He was shocked and then came back and further pursued and now we are married 4 years. I had some chuckles through this video remembering the beginning lol. Great knowledge to have, now I can word what worked to the younger lady's looking for a significant other, *cough cough my sister
I hold back on the feelings, it's usually the guy declaring all his feeling quickly. I tell them when I'm interested but when they get to heavy, I ask their interests and what they like to do. I don't know another way of doing it, I hope it's right? 🤔 I have watched so many of your videos, they are great and so informative thank you! ❤
Talk to him more... hmmm. Okay Mark but what do I talk to him about???🤣🤣 I'm so shy I really dont know how to spark a conversation or what to ask him to get to know him more
I've been praying to God for a long time to help me meet the right person and who loves God as I do and live for God as well and go to church and pray with me everyday, and be happy together 🙏
I see a lot of comments below which are all encouraging two different things. 1. Desiring and craving a relationship so badly is idolatry. 2. There is nothing wrong with forgetting about God and his mission at this stage because without companionship or help, I cannot fulfill his plan for me. Both these arguments are all taken from extremely generic and and narrow perspectives. We tend to forget that every single individual has their own individual and intrinsic relational and sexual desires. The people who are saying that " God is enough, and you should be satisfied in him" are firstly wrong as God has said very bluntly in his own words that " it is not Good for man to be alone" and that the eye cannot say to the hand "I have no need of you" so God is enough sounds nice but that is not true or even biblical as God has wired most us in such a way that we need this as much as we need food. My point on individual relational cravings: The people who are claiming point #1 may not necessarily be called to singleness but you have to understand that your intrinsic cravings for companionship are obviously less stronger than other people's. I have friends who strongly desire to be married, but they would still, however, cope just fine being single! There are other people however, such as myself, who are wired by God in such a way where the desire for romantic and sexual union is a very very strong desire of the heart, and it is actually dangerous if not provided for. Jesus fasted for 40 days in the desert. Do you think he was content in God? Absolutely yes! What else do you think was continuously running through his mind day and night in that period? "Some food would be really, REALLY nice right now" (#understatement101) So I just need to encourage the people who do not have a desire as strong as that to please understand where these lonely Christians are. If you you want to complain about this kind of contentment then please read about Hannah in 1 Samuel chapter 1 because that is the same craving these singles have for a spouse. They are all single because we live in a fallen world that hated God so yes, trying to find people who love God in a world that hates him is very very difficult and the numbers are not evenly matched so it makes perfect sense that Christian singles are desparate because God's design has again been messed up because Christian singles almost extinct and the rest are taken! Yes a spouse is not garunteed, but God will not drive you to a stage where you either sin or spiritually die. Relationships are a big deal to God and his gifts are not to be idolized, rejected or belittled. To all the Christian singles who are not active in Christianity: You ( or we) are not off the hook. We are not called to disobey Gods command to love him, live for him and live in him by sitting around and being grumpy until we get what we want. Jesus promised that all your needs will be provided. If you are getting angry with God because he is not giving you a relationship, then I am not surprised that you are still single because obviously, you do not want anything more than that. If all you want is for God to give you a spouse, then that is a mind and heart which is based on prosperity principals. And God will not provide a precious gift to someone who has the wrong motives in their heart. I can understand that it gets worrying that it looks hopeless, but examine yourself and see that maybe God will not provide a need to someone who actually doesn't want HIM, but rather wants SOMETHING from him. If God is a prop or a tool to give you a relationship, then I am sorry to be blunt but you deserve to be single. As much as I cannot sleep over this battle of lonliness and frustration myself, I confess that there is something so much greater and glorious and something so much more important. And if you die single , having fought hard this battle on this earth, I have no doubt, ( not sure about scriptures that promise this) but based on my knowledge of God's unchanging character, that you will be rewarded with a hundredfold of spiritual pleasures in eternity.
I just recently subscribed to this channel and really find the videos informational. I trust God with all of my heart and pray regularly for His WILL to be done. I just hope that if God is going to put "it" in my heart for somebody...that He puts in that person's heart also. ☺I don't have any particular person in my mind at this time but, I do hope it's a true, mutual connection...when it happens. And when He does put in his heart, that the guy will be brave enough to trust God too.
I encouraged the guy I like and I didn't even noticed it at the time! 😀 He was listening to a kid with a deficiency that wouldn't stop talking, and I made a joke about how patient he was. ♡♡♡ In my head, it was just a joke. But he looked at me and knew where my heart was. My mouth said a joke, but my heart was saying: wow, you're so patient, I like it so much. ❤️
This advice is on point but the challenge is when you want to start something long distance. That in itself is a challenge but then trying to be subtle from another state/location is just not going to work.
How do u talk to him more, without making him feel annoyed/scaring him away😭😭😭I’m so scared that a guy talks to u back/snapchats w u frequently just because he’s the leader of the fellowship, and he has the responsibility to care for each member, esp for new frds.
I'm about to try the first 2 tomorrow if the guy I like is in church tomorrow. I think he likes me cause he's awkward around me which I find is super adorable. He's so amazing! I've never felt like this about a guy before...
praying the best for you, i am a Messianic Jew...and totally agree with you...except feelings can lead us instead of His guidance..the good shepherd david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com
I think I'm too obvious when I like a guy.. Communication means affection. I just need to know more about the I'm interested with by talking to him more often?Sometimes I talk too much..I think I'm just confused... I'm still naive about men..thank you.please keep on guiding us..I would like to listen more on your videos..God bless You!
just relax...when we are confused ask....and care is important...some talk alot some little we are all different ikr...thanks i am a Messianic Jew...and agree with you...except feelings can lead us instead of His guidance..the good shepherd david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com Wyeth
I just want to say that, though they may be very few, but there are guys who don't easily assume a girl is romantically interested and even feel quite comfortable doing activities such as doing a sport or going to the cinema one on one with a girl they're only friends with and have no other intentions. And it's not just about not seeing the subtle signs but about just being comfortable with such things and not feeling as though these should be anything non-platonic in general. I know someone like this. He said he had to learn to restrain from things that may lead a girl on even though for him personaly those would be just friendship things with someone he values as a person.
I like you videos very much. At the moment I am struggeling with the question if he is interested or just kind and polite. I find it very hard to make a difference between it. Do you have any advices for that? God bless you!
Great question, I will do a video on that. One tip is to observe his behavior towards others. If he treats you differently that might be a sign he's interested. If he is kind to all then it probably is not a sign he likes you
I don't want to be the one who makes the first move. I spent most of my life asking guys out or approaching the man first. I want to do it differently this time.
I believe both if interested should show it in a pure manner but yes us men should open doors and be the gentleman God created us to be.I don't however know how to read minds and a woman who hides her interest expecting a man to pursue her is just not realistic or practical.Yes we should pray about ALL things but sometimes the LORD doesn't give us answers the way we expect either.It should be pre mutual in the beginning stages but as a man i have no problem stepping up because that's my duty as a believer.🙏🙌☝🔥👑
I meet a good man of God at work. We worked together for a year then he got a different job but we still went to church together.We have become really good friends this year. Talking on the phone 2 to 3 times a week, and doing church stuff together. I will not ask him out so I am just enjoying this season and we will see what God has planned.
5:42 hahahhaa. That made me smile! We all need encouragement. I used to be so hypocritical of men but I have learned to edify people with my tongue. Man or woman. :)
I really like this guy at my church and I have actually followed all of these things and we have become really good friends and we have a lot of common interests. We now hang out weekly outside of church and church events. We don’t hang out alone, there is always a third friend, but during movies we sit close, not cuddling, but to where our arms are touching even though there is plenty of room to sit elsewhere. Now, it’s been 2 months and I feel like I like him even more and I feel as if he might feel the same. I’m waiting on God’s timing. And I am also waiting on this guys timing and trying to respect how he wants to pursue. I don’t even know if he has ever had a gf before or perused a woman before. I’m still waiting for a casual non-obvious way to ask him. Anyway, I don’t know if this is okay, but I’m giving it until July and if he hasn’t expressed to me that he does indeed like me, I’m going to come right out and ask him. I’m praying about it, but I need to know one way or another and I think 6 months is a pretty decent amount of time to hold off and give him the space to go at his own pace. If he doesn’t feel the same, I need to move on for my own sake because with how much time we spend together, it might prevent the guy who God has for me from pursuing me. Idk can anyone else relate? I honestly feel like this is the guy God has for me. I have been praying for the past 2 years for the guy I marry to love God more than he loves me, go to my church, and that I not be initially attracted to him. He had been going to my church 6 months before I felt God put it on my heart to reach out to him. He wasn’t my type, but that has now changed. I invited him hiking and now we go to the gym or hiking every Saturday and we both are into testimonies and content creation and he’s now the audio engineer for my testimony project at church. He also does sweet things like give me a speaker when my radio wasn’t working, he fixed my car key remote so I could unlock my car from a distance, and he has done other things. He’s always eager to help me. So, I feel like he likes me but then again, what if he’s just being nice? I feel God growing me in patience but man this whole Christian dating thing is tough as someone who lived in the world and has only been saved 4 years. I should also mention, I am 33 and the guy I like is 30. If I was in my early 20’s I’d just ride it out, but at my age, I am looking to settle down and have children. I appreciate these videos, it’s definitely helped a lot with how Christians should pursue and date each other. I think now I mostly want to know how to go about approaching this guy with my feelings without being pushy.
Well there is a guy I realised I really liked but I think I was too late to drive that point home because in all the time he sent me signals, I never responded because I was healing from a past relationship. Now I feel he's right for me. But the old vibe is gone. He's more withdrawn. We are friends I don't want to lose that. But I desire more. Should I tell him that I like him?
I once had a crush on a choir director so did all the other women in the church he was a widowed handsome man he played the piano like nobody else could he sang Christian songs and even preached at times in place of our pastor. he was always friendly at the door is people were leaving and he would shake my hand reel tight look in my eyes and say it was so good to see you today and I thought he liked me the way he shook my hand with meaningful gesture being a very shy and humble person I am and I considered myself at least attractive I had confidence in myself in that way so I was bold enough to ask him if he would like to take the opportunity to go to a concert with me I had two free tickets. he suddenly said he was sorry that I should just ask somebody else in place of him. oh my goodness that was such a let-down I was never so embarrassed. I guess my crush just went right down the tubes. so I decided never to try to date someone at church. I believe men and women want to meet a good Christian values person of worth and it's very difficult to cross that line at church. so how is someone to meet someone if they are Christians and can't find the right person at church. I later knew that God was protecting me. I found out he was having an affair with a married woman. never put any man or woman on a pedestal until you really know who they are the only one that should be on a pedestal is Jesus Christ he is perfect
Chocko
Gabrielle Budd woow 😳
Don't base everything on that one man. Doesn't mean a thing. Don't be afraid to speak up the next time. A man that likes you will appreciate you speaking with him.
@Carly Fournier God was protecting her from being another one of this man's mistresses.
In hindsight most of the time I felt rejection I found it was God protecting me from a mess. 🥰
I think Isaac and Rebecca give us a great tip about how a woman should approach a man. In the Bible you don't see Rebecca going after any man. She wasn't anxious about that, she was just working and the blessing came to her. I think trusting God is the key to get the right guy for a Cristian woman! Great video!
Amein agreed
Amen 🙏🏽!
Hello
I agree amen.
True, I agree.
Simply follow the Holy Spirit rather than your feelings. He'll convict you of what you should or should not do. Because if the desire you have for someone comes from the Lord, the Lord will do the work. What I mean here is you don't have to appear desperate because Abba will provide a way. It won't bother you if that person likes someone else. Because your security comes from the Lord. He is enough, our bridegroom, and our everything.
I REALLY like your comment. It is simple yet very profound. ❤
Thanks for this but.I feel like I got this too late.I felt like a friend of mine was the right person for me but felt he was taking too long to commit so I asked him about his intentions at different point in time and even admitted that I was getting too attached to him .I feel like I was too forward instead of letting the Spirit of lead.now he is acting distant. I feel so vulnerable and embarrassed and feel like I should just let go to save myself further embarrassment 🥹
@@olusabigail9975Your friend is not a good friend for being distant. Everyone seems to be unaware or forgetful of the fact that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ, first and foremost. We should still be there for one another regardless of our feelings. The truth of Scripture trumps/overrides any feeling la each party has towards the other. We are to be sacrificial in all our ways.
I agree that men should do the pursuing. But ladies, telling men they need to "man up" and "step up" will absolutely not help. Instead of assuming the worst - that we are cowards and weaklings - please try to understand that we are just as fallen, broken and in need of understanding as you. We need grace as much as you. And grace is really attractive.
I love this. Thank you
Do ladies want to know why I dont step up its because Im not interested. I am 32 in my life I have only asked out 4 people all were Nos of course but i remember them clearly because it was from the heart. I need to feel in my heart and my soul that the person is worth the time and effort that we would get along well and be the bestest of friends
1. Talks to them a lot more than you talk to other people.
2. Encourage them.
3. Use the power of invitation. Invite him to spend more time with you but not in an obvious way. 😂
1. Don't tell him directly but giving him signs how you feel about him.
YES, YES, YES and once again: YES! I’m a christian guy (27, freshly and happy dating) and I approve every part point of that advice 👍 1. I do get suspicious, that a girl likes me, when she takes her time to talk to me. 2. Any honest (important) positive comments on my skills were more worth that ANY thing, she could else do for me. (Don’t get discouraged by guys possibly awkward response to your compliment, neither push it to strong, just let him know, that you like the way he does stuff). I want for my girl & future wife to be the best, to serve her and be appreciated in my ability to navigate the world, grow and reach my goals in a way God helped me to develop over time. That feeling of being respected is iiiiiiiiiiiiiiinvaluable. A very strong fuel. Use with care and honesty:) 3. Inviting a guy to do something for you is an awesome strategy! Win-Win-Win-Win. One thing though: he might just be friendly and not romantically interested, buuuut you might still have great time and a problem solved (or at least partially solved, or at least get a new perspective on the issues, guys lllove to give there perspectives of issues 🙈) and you two might know each over a little bit better, no pressure:) or he might be interested, but just be busy at that time... dunno) just some thoughts of mine. Best of luck, sisters!!!!! Pray for your relationships, be patient, trust your Creator and let Him shape and prepare you for the life he has planed and prepared for you 😌✨ God bless you!! 🌿 !
@@petersayatshkin7454 Thanks for taking the time to write out all of your feedback on these!
Peter Sayatshkin thank u for the insights
ugh to late
I really think this thing of a guy who hits on you or shows interest in any way being called "creepy" or stalking you or whatever?, is the thing that has done the MAJORITY of NORMAL women the greatest disservice..:
Normal Guys are so concerned about being thought of in that way.. just precisely because they are NOT that way at all... just interested in a woman...
PLEASE...
Can you overly sensitive women /show off women ; "He's stalking me -"meantime he is just being a real man... how we ( normal women) would like him to be...
So ...can you overly sensitive/scared/ traumatised ladies please get some help/therapy...
and I can talk... was married to a raging narc for 38 years longer than I care to admit...
THE REST OF US WOULD JUST LIKE TO CARRY ON A NORMAL LIFE WITH A BETTER MAN ...
If it’s Gods will it will happen, regardless things will flow so naturally :)
Evelyn Calderon Tu sera mia,
nomas no te pierdas en nuestro flow.
You are SOOOOOOOOOO CORRECT !!!!
Not without some effort on your part.
You must make the effort to position yourself
I thought it was the right time to pursue
"Encouragement is biblically flirting" 😂😅
Tehillah Praise 😂😂
Oh nice
Tehillah Praise my current situation. Will tell you how it goes 😂😂 I’m not flirtatious but I know how to be nice.
Tehillah Praise will try that 😂😂
😂😂 But also 💯
Ruth put her best clothes and perfume on... she put herself in a position whereby Boaz knew that she was available and desired Him as a husband😁👌☺️💕...she then waited to see how he responded...🙏🏻❤️
Child of God Yehovah exactly! a good example. ❤️
Trish G amen she slept at his feet in submission
Ruth pursued Boaz. Ruth PROPOSED marriage to Boaz. That Leverite Marriage deal took 6 to 9 months to carry out, while she pursued him. And this wasn't just an oddball situation because Levirite Marriage was the Law, for everybody. Where does the Bible say a man is to pursue a woman? Don't put words in God's mouth.
@@scottwhitley5542 Ruth didn't pursue him - she invited him to pursue her.
Look at Adam and Eve, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, Moses and Zipporah, etc...
Biblically, after the man had an evident relationship with God, had a purpose (job or calling), then his wife was led to him. Then, he pursued her.
@@BluDrop5 Great examples, well said!
Guys need to start stepping up and pursuing women. Thats the Godly way!
I would have to agree with you, however, with today’s society with metoo and feminism is just harder to approach. Not only that, women hides their signals more these days with showing their interests. (Not saying you, just in general)
I don't know your heart, but incase you are, or you will... Please don't think playing mind games to excessively keep him chasing is a Godly way either, that's playing mind games, and it will almost always lead to game over, and if not the buttons will be stiff so you won't get very far in the relationship.
If a woman is excessively trying to make me chase her beyond what's natural, I'm backing out, unless God told me otherwise. I understand it's natural and I find it cute but when it comes to excessively trying to bend the strings to make him chase you, it will exaust him and you will become selfish, and end up sincerely accusing him of being selfish because you feel neglected, but he isn't actually neglecting you, it's because you probably have wounds of past hurt which God needs to heal, and if you keep that mindset, you'll be insecure throughout your relationship, because when he's unable to you'll be insecure about it. It's covetousness for attention it will hurt your heart, and it means you need to ask God to fill your heart to be the main one you need attention from.
I've got some past wounds that need healing to, it's painful.
This is true. I also don't think there's fault in a woman observing a guy she is interested in and genuinely engaging him in conversation as a clue to your interest. Feel him out as to personality etc. This will also illuminate how you can best proceed. Some guys are more reserved and guarded, especially with modern cultural hypersensitivities
I. agree with you on all of this as it most certainly is. Be blessed always. 💖💖
And women need to stop giving good guys attitude
My friend had a crush on a guy for years-finally she told him her feelings. They are in a relationship. So while I can see guys’ wanting to “take the lead,” I think sometimes being upfront is refreshing. Ruth is an example for me.
Wow lol
I agree, a man won’t know how someone feels unless they tell them. It won’t hurt just letting them know you’re interested, that’s definitely not too strong or initiating anything.
I like it!!
@@chloeleinster251 I love anything that is too strong. I am looking for nice woman to get married .
Ruth didn't take the lead. Boaz showed interest by offering protection and provisions. She responded.
“I enjoy small talk with my wife....that’s because I want my wife to like me” 😆😂 that made me laugh
That
Thanks Mark, I really needed to hear this. I caught up with a girl, had an amazing time with her. She extended an invite to me the next day which I accepted, and then when I saw her another time I got really nervous and overwhelmed around her and got attacked horribly by the enemy by past hurt in opening my heart up. I just felt in my own head that it was moving so quickly out of nowhere. She even asked me a week beforehand that she wanted to catch up with me, but I was busy at the time, but this planted a seed in my heart and started to think of her more than just a church friend.
Now I desire to pursue her by getting to know her more, but not being too direct too quickly, might take a couple of days to pray over this and ask God to give me the capacity to love her as Christ loves me.
Listen to Yolanda Adams's song, "Open My Heart." Ask God for guidance. He will answer. Trust in all that He reveals to you in due time. You will know.
This is so beautiful! ❤
@@LoveFirstYou ❤ God bless you,
I'm taking this advice all the glory to Jesus Christ !!!!
As a dude I can verify everything that was said is spot on. If any of this is too complicated, just throw some more smiles his way when you're talking. If he's at all interested in you, thats only gonna make him like you more.
Johnny Thus very true my friend.thank you
I’m hoping so I surly SMILE every chance I have when bi bump into him.. HE Smiles back and he gives me his full attention... an we both hinted about coffee together sometime and he answered I like that... but nothing had be of it yet... so tell me Johnny, should I just continue going onwards and just forget it.... may he really don’t want to get know one another
I cannot believe how I was out of track before watching this video!😨 I am literally doing all these things with the guys I don't like and completely the opposite towards the guys I like. That's why they never approach even if they seem that they notice me. I can't believe it. Thank a lot for these words of wisdom and advices. God bless you
So glad this was helpful! God bless :)
This is so me as well.
Thanks for admitting your shortcomings. You being authentic and honest about it is the first step to doing & being better. Keep doing better & you'll get a different result. An honest woman. Very admireable. 💯✔
Definitely have been making this same mistake as well!
Me too.
I truly laughed at the first point because guys love to assume you like them even when you're just being friendly. I actually have to not smile as much when interacting with the opposite sex because I'm generally a friendly person. I even have to temper myself when it comes to encouraging males because it comes naturally to encourage others. Too many men are not pursuing women for fear of rejection.
Well said!
That fear, any fear I believe are works of the devil.
We shouldn’t be fearful and think negatively and dwell on our past rejections and bringing that mindset into our present circumstances .
So, we should always remain positive of the possibilities that the person may reconsider accepting you back even if they rejected you the first time. Relationships are a big commitment to handle too.
Divine Diva Come be my freind will see if you can handle the beauty I am, like all the girls who want to eat me like a desert. 😍😚
I'm dying of laughter because I do both 1 & 2!!! I'm in leadership & super social, talkative.. it's the Jesus in me to be social & all that. And I mass texts or write encouraging notes to both guys & gals all the time!!! 🤣🥰🤣🥰
So true!
This makes me so happy becuz i was doing all of these points without even knowing it was the right way and he's definitely interested and responding well... we've developed a great steady friendship within romantic interest... iit feels good and led by the Spirit... thanx Mark Ford confirming what the Lord was already doing in my life!
You need to teach the rest of us. I’ve fumbled a bit
Many people choose someone, they prefer or 'think' might be a good choice and then ask the lord to make it work. Whoever, we end up with, we should be confidant that it was his choice for us, not our own, which is why it is important to receive confirmation from the lord. When we give God the option to choose our spouses, he is mindful of our needs and our expectations as long as they align with his will. The more we understand and accept how much we're loved by God, the easier it gets to patiently wait and trust his timing.
I love your anserw
But if we ask God then how we can understand and read the signs he gives us?
Sugeta Arul so good and so true! I believe this 100%
So true!
I believe God gives us multiple good Choices.
I did the blunt approach once after a few years of confusion. He gave both vibes (friendship and romantic). I needed closure to the confusion. He eventually let me know he was interested but decided he wasn’t interested in me romantically anymore. It was good for me so that I could move on.
Ebony Oliver amen 🙏
Speaking as a man, I assume that if you give a guy an "obvious" hint, and he acts like he doesn't get it, odds are, he knew exactly what you wanted, but he wasn't attracted to you, and he wanted to spare your feelings and avoid a potentially awkward situation by rejecting you outright.
Typically, a man is clear (e.g. verbal, non-verbal, the way he treats other) about what he wants. Thus, he wouldn't show friend vibes to someone who he wants to be romantic with. So, if you perceive this, move on because he's not ready (for whatever reason) to be in an exclusive relationship with you.
Just to add a little bit of a woman's perspective, I sort of was blunt with a guy and told him I liked him (after a few months of back and forth where things were unclear). I do regret being blunt, and as you said, instead of starting a relationship it ended a friendship. But at the same time, I'm kinda glad it ended b/c there was no going back to what it once was, and it helped me to move on. So I think sometimes it's OK for the woman to be blunt and get it out of the way. But that's just my 2 cents. :)
King Xerxes: Come to my banquet pls ily :p
Queen Vashti: no lol
*Queen Vashti has been kicked from this server*
😂😂😂
Come in dude. That's how my name is. Lol
@Tyler Gibson in Hebrew its without the H
I told his sister (my friend) I liked her brother, and she told him I had feelings for him. He was already showing me signs, and she told him to pursue me if he felt something back and he did :))
Thank you Mark. God bless you for helping single people find a husband or wife.
You welcome Maria :)
Just the fact that you spend YOUR time making these videos to help and lead Christian Men and Women means so much. Your wife is lucky to be married to you and I am sure you feel lucky being married to her! Thank you for your efforts and the time you make for this ministry :) :) South Africa
Yes, but I also recommend either letting things grow like you would with any other friendship in the body, and also spend some times praying about the guy you are interested in and asking God if it his will to open his eyes, in the meantime spending time adoring the Lord and loving others. Because he will be more attracted to the fruit of a godly woman.
So beautifully said. I agree. 🙂
Gracias for so True praying on if it is the person, an asking MyDad♥️☝️♥️🕊🙏🏼
This!! ❤
It’s really nice to hear a guy’s perspective for us Christian single women! Thank you so much for sharing this, it’s much needed!!
Great advice.
Would you be open to work on a video for women who are having trouble trusting men from past relationships and, how to gain trust through God's wisdom in a loving acceptable relationship?
How to spot men who are truly authentic, non-judgemental.
If you have already done this, I will check your videos.
Thanks!💛
Tanya Stevens agree, I need it TOO!
Yes, I love this idea, great suggestion. I will add it to my list and hopefully do this soon
Yes please!! I was horribly abused growing up and trust is hard for me.
"But Jesus on his part would not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people 25 and needed no one to testify about anyone; for he himself knew what was in everyone." (John 2:24-25 NRSV). If Jesus didn't trust any then how can we?
Tanya Stevens YEESSS
Small talk: one purpose is to open a conversation which can lead to deeper more profound talk.
I enjoyed your video!
1. Little talks with the guy
2. Encourage him
3. Invite him to do things with you
I had an interest in a woman who showed all these signs so I sat back and waited to see how things would develop. The more I got to know her the more I saw that she was most likely just being friendly. But it gave me time to get to know here objectively and from that I saw that we were not on the same page as far as Bible knowledge went. As a result, I was able to assess her qualities and move on from pursuing her without any one getting hurt. And her none the wiser. As a result, the Lord has used it to establish me in my purpose to encourage others to grow in the knowledge of God and to be free to go wherever He directs me to go. God will always work good to those who love Him and are called in accordance with His purpose. The ultimate purpose for humans is to have a relationship with God and this far outlasts anything the temporal reality we reside in can offer.
I’m so shy when I like the guy .. I talk to everyone else everyone real easy Except the guy I like !! What to do when shy and liking that one guy I avoid .?:/ but really want to talk to him .
It might be hard at first but the more time you spend w him the easier it will get.
I am having the same issue, we are in the same group so we get to contribute on group level but when it's just the two of us, I get really nervous so I normally have someone join us for a chat but I do text him alot basic things like what our brother is talking on
I have spent a long time studying how to get a man to love you more and found a great website at Covert attractor audit (look it up on google)
Moroccanluv88 Bite the bullet..gurl
Just talk to him I promise it’ll be okay
Just from personal experience here. I am very relationally clueless. I had this girl who I was head over heels for and I always made it a point to talk to her whenever I saw her, but I never really initiated anything because I wasn’t sure how she felt. One day she came in the store with a guy and she was dropping slot of hints and chatting me up, and honestly it felt like she might’ve been flirting. However, seeing this guy she came in with standing next to her I thought she was already seeing this guy and therefore just being friendly with me so I didn’t take any of the bait. I later found out from a sister that this girl did really like me and I went up to her and asked her out, unfortunately by this time she had found someone else and moved on, and I kick myself for that a little more every day. So just a guys advice for the ladies, just because he doesn’t respond doesn’t always mean he’s not interested, he may just be stupid like I am, so take that as you will 😅
That's so sad 😭
In all seriousness. Perfect love cast on fear. I don't think a perfect formula exist for how to start a relationship but if you go to overboard to fast it will scare anyone you like. We are all human get to know the person first and see if it's a good experience or a bad one. Not everything that glitters is gold.
You’ve showed me a different point of view with the pushiness... I truly didn’t knw tht. I’m a very straight blunt person and hate wasting my time. I will take your advice 🤩🤩🤩Thank you and God bless!!!👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I'm the same way Patrice Wiley so I've had to learn gentleness the hard way :)
Pushiness. Dominating. Strong Character...why does a woman do this? Why are people men or women needy? How do you heal if you have been hurt and you turned around to be the dominating one? You forgive, but your gentleness is about gone out the door like way back?
Your advice is always so good! I appreciate your non-judgemental candour.
So glad you enjoy these videos :) 👍
You explained this really well. Very practical.
8:38 beyondish, Dont agree. *HE* WHO FINDS A WIFE FINDS A GOOD THING. If it is Gods will then he will ask us out. It also shows me that this person isnt timid. I need a strong Godly man who can be bold not timid. This world is rough i dont have time for games.
Pursing a man *N E V E R* works
it isnt pursuing ..letting a guy know by paying attention to him that youre intrested....until then he isnt probably going to even think to ask you out...yet you never know...lol, would you like to got out:? just saying david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com and be humorous ok Romans 8:28&29
I agree with you Alina, women of God, don't worry about having a guy or no. Because God have plan for us and now, we just focus on our relationship with God until God says it's time. When the time comes, you'll just instantly knew He was the God Chosen one for you. We don't have to go looking or pursuing any man. Because God knows our timing. There's a reason for closed door ❤
This was very good. I'm married, so I technically didn't need it for me, but I have a lot of single friends in church. When I was single, the message I was given was that women had to be 100% passive and just wait to be discovered. This led to a lot of passive-aggressive flirting, instead of the straight-forward signals given in this video. Good work.
Flirting doesn't have to be sexual. It can be a playful way with words that shows you are a fun person to be around.
How do you flirt without being sexual?
Correct, Thank You!!
Words and actions too Can be non sexual. We as Christians have this thing so mixed up. The comments confirm why so many are single.😔
Loraine Wilson you have pinned it.i also second your complement
@@smokerx6291 I kind of hate that I'm so "flirty" without being sexual..I get told this often 🤨 I smile, give eye contact a lot, laugh, compliment people, but it's just my personality. Ironically, the one person I do have a crush on, I act exactly the same around him as I do other people..the only difference is I try to talk to him more than other people and how nervous, happy and warm I feel 😫😅
So funny, every time I think about a question that I would like to write on here, another one of your videos come up which answers the question I wanted to ask. So no need to ask. So far anyway 😂😂😂 Mark, you are definitely a blessing to a lot of us. I’m sure a lot of women would agree with me on that. Thank you for starting this ministry. God bless you and your family!!! 😊❤️
I've been divorced for quite some time, and have gone on a Christian dating site, but not a lot of good replies or ways to meet via social media I am finding out. So I'm looking forward to hearing more about dating as a single older woman and being found by a quality Christian man in today's society.
If I have a daughter- I’ll definitely warn her to be weary of men who’s concept of masculinity is so fragile it shatters when a women takes the initiative 😂
it's about the long term effects... some men become lazy and spoilt when women do all the pursuing. I've seen it and it can be quite exhausting for women😕 don't set your daughter up for a life like that
@@kannot1 It’s about the long term effects... some women become lazy and spoiled when men do all of the pursuing. I’ve seen it happen too and it can be quit exhausting for men. Don’t set your sons up for a life like that. 😂
Lol
It has to be real... pursuing seems like effort... but if you love each other then surely it’s no effort?
Is there childish conversation happening between you two or what? Personally I think the man should pursue the woman. But both parties should show interest😊
I think your videos are wonderful, so well spoken and beneficial for everyone. You are very smart and good, i am a muslim woman and i love watching your videos. God bless you and give u strength
This was extremely helpful. I have done a few of these things. And I was about to make that fatal mistake of telling him, based on advice from 2 young, single ministers. Thank you!!
Good one! I think there needs to be a video about the guys that "don't have the guts" and are fearful/in denial and how to handle that!
Hey, could you do a video on how to if a shy Christian guy/girl likes you? Or, anything about shy Christians? Thanks!
Hi Fuzzy Mino Kitten, here's a video for introverts th-cam.com/video/1sMwS7A-lXk/w-d-xo.html let me know if you have follow up questions after watching it :) God bless
seriously, it was my first time, but I was kind of dating someone two years ago, and suddenly our friendship faded away and we stopped seeing each other. anyway, nothing happened just we stopped seeing each other. yet i got a dream and heard a voice when i was praying in the chapel in the eucharist chapel, the voice was to be patient. every time i pray about these lovey dovey stuff, i get dreams like crucifix or/and cross or sometimes i see our Virgin mary and they tell me to be patient. every time. i am not kidding..
This video showed up in my reccomended and it literally answered all my questions that I've been praying about lately. Thank you! :)
Great tips! I have tried tip 3 and will try the others. Will keep you posted. If its God's will its His will.
I like how you mentioned invitation. It makes me feel like my presence matters.
I am so grateful for your ministry through videos brother in Christ. I will be praying for you and your family as you are helping many! Looking forward to new videos in 2020.
Amen! Thank you Bethany! All glory to God!
Any tips on how to tell them that you are not interested though?
That's what I need! 😂
😩😩😩😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
I'm not into you. Go away.
I was in that situation. Our mutual friends tried to set us up and I just said no. I said it a billion times to all my friends...if I'm interested in you, you will know. 😂 I'm make an effort to get to know you and your walk with God. I spend more time with that person in a group settings. But I would say "I'm not currently interested in dating any guys I've meet so far."
You delivered that so well, you come across very articulate. Your videos are so helpful thank you
When all three happened and you still get friend zoned 😂… Lord is good
Awww.... being in the "friend zone" is not a bad position. I would recommend that if you be the best friend to her that you can possibly be, eventually she will come around. Use that position, out shine the competition. You will win her over! Blessings to You!!!
Just found your channel, breath of fresh air to hear you advice with faith in mind. Thanks
I've heard from several church people that if a guy really likes you, he will be the one to pursue you. Girls aren't really supposed to do the pursuing. Just curious on what your thoughts are one this.....
Talking to the guy will help him to know that you exist :)
This isnt necessarily pursuing, just dropping a hint 🙂
It's 2019
In other words, you interpreted what you heard to mean that it is your role to be completely passive and lazy in your relationships, and just wait for the men that you like to read your mind and come over to introduce themselves first. You don't have to act all stand-offish and cold and never speak to anyone unless unless they speak to you first. If you act unfriendly and don't socialize at all, then people will avoid you, because they assume that you are rude, and that you don't like them. Acting cold and overly quiet comes across as unfriendly, and is usually a turn-off for most people. You know, it won't kill you to walk over and introduce yourself to the other people in your church (male or female), instead of just waiting for other people to take the initiative and introduce themselves to you. Even if you have no romantic interest in these guys, they are still your brothers in Christ, and you might as well get to know them, because you will be spending eternity with them in Heaven one day.
If you watch the video to the end, I think that he actually answers your question, and gives you his thoughts on girls doing the pursing, and what's appropriate, and what's not.
What about Ruth?
ThankYou for this video. Im actually asking the Lord to show me his way to proceed with the person im interested in. I'm an introvert but i wil talk to him more and with God's grace, i pray, he wil notice me.
I needed this cuz sometimes I'm just kinda out of control~ 😊
I feel like some guys are so insecure even if I give them signs they still doubt it
It's best to be friends first. Brother and sister in Christ FIRST.
I'd never ask a guy out. Maybe tell him about an event coming up? It's so forward. It's masculine behavior.
Thank God for notifications 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾
I see there’s levels to this. Lol 📝
Thank GOD for this video. I almost made the mistake of bluntly laying my feelings out on the table but the HOLY SPIRIT stopped me!
I'm so glad this was helpful to you :)
Same here 👏
Whew!!😂
Went to church for the first time since I was a boy in the 90's this past Sunday. So many women stared at me. That was kind of awkward. Then a few women came up to me with big smiles on their faces and just said hi to me and left. It was kinda cute to watch them like get all nervous and watch them hype themselves up and come up to me. I'm curious what my second time going will bring. I don't care for all the singing. I enjoy the preaching though.
I hope you kept going back!
Loved the video! We’ve got #1 down! I did #2 today (before I watched the video)! Not sure I’m bold enough for #3. How do you determine if he’s “relationally clueless” vs not interested or maybe just shy and introverted?
Celeste Cummins, I would assume he's not clueless and is just not interested. However, if you become friends or know this person well you may realize he needs help :)
I’m usually too quick to assume that the guy I like wouldn’t be interested and then overcompensate by trying not to interact with him too much 😕 Clearly I’m just shooting myself in the foot! I knew most of these things already but just hearing it from a guy’s perspective helps a lot
This is a great video and oddly completely depicts how my husband and I got together. I gave him all the signs and he responded with interest but he was clueless so I got upset one day because of something he said and another guy he was talking to said come on man she likes you. He was shocked and then came back and further pursued and now we are married 4 years. I had some chuckles through this video remembering the beginning lol. Great knowledge to have, now I can word what worked to the younger lady's looking for a significant other, *cough cough my sister
That’s cute. Lol!
@@mariahconklin4150 Thank you
That's awesome. I was just wondering if this advice actually worked for anyone 😆 thank you for sharing that!! Praise God!
13:10 was funny cuz it was like the “i like you alot, maybe we can hang out or something” vine 😂
May God Bless this ministry
I hold back on the feelings, it's usually the guy declaring all his feeling quickly. I tell them when I'm interested but when they get to heavy, I ask their interests and what they like to do. I don't know another way of doing it, I hope it's right? 🤔 I have watched so many of your videos, they are great and so informative thank you! ❤
Talk to him more... hmmm. Okay Mark but what do I talk to him about???🤣🤣 I'm so shy I really dont know how to spark a conversation or what to ask him to get to know him more
I needed this long ago (sigh). But this is stll a great video. Good job!
👍
I've been praying to God for a long time to help me meet the right person and who loves God as I do and live for God as well and go to church and pray with me everyday, and be happy together 🙏
cool now relax...keep loving Jesus, and leave it in His hands...He will shake you when it;s time...dont try and do the job for Him
I see a lot of comments below which are all encouraging two different things.
1. Desiring and craving a relationship so badly is idolatry.
2. There is nothing wrong with forgetting about God and his mission at this stage because without companionship or help, I cannot fulfill his plan for me.
Both these arguments are all taken from extremely generic and and narrow perspectives. We tend to forget that every single individual has their own individual and intrinsic relational and sexual desires.
The people who are saying that " God is enough, and you should be satisfied in him" are firstly wrong as God has said very bluntly in his own words that " it is not Good for man to be alone" and that the eye cannot say to the hand "I have no need of you" so God is enough sounds nice but that is not true or even biblical as God has wired most us in such a way that we need this as much as we need food.
My point on individual relational cravings: The people who are claiming point #1 may not necessarily be called to singleness but you have to understand that your intrinsic cravings for companionship are obviously less stronger than other people's. I have friends who strongly desire to be married, but they would still, however, cope just fine being single! There are other people however, such as myself, who are wired by God in such a way where the desire for romantic and sexual union is a very very strong desire of the heart, and it is actually dangerous if not provided for. Jesus fasted for 40 days in the desert. Do you think he was content in God? Absolutely yes! What else do you think was continuously running through his mind day and night in that period? "Some food would be really, REALLY nice right now" (#understatement101) So I just need to encourage the people who do not have a desire as strong as that to please understand where these lonely Christians are. If you you want to complain about this kind of contentment then please read about Hannah in 1 Samuel chapter 1 because that is the same craving these singles have for a spouse. They are all single because we live in a fallen world that hated God so yes, trying to find people who love God in a world that hates him is very very difficult and the numbers are not evenly matched so it makes perfect sense that Christian singles are desparate because God's design has again been messed up because Christian singles almost extinct and the rest are taken! Yes a spouse is not garunteed, but God will not drive you to a stage where you either sin or spiritually die. Relationships are a big deal to God and his gifts are not to be idolized, rejected or belittled.
To all the Christian singles who are not active in Christianity:
You ( or we) are not off the hook. We are not called to disobey Gods command to love him, live for him and live in him by sitting around and being grumpy until we get what we want. Jesus promised that all your needs will be provided. If you are getting angry with God because he is not giving you a relationship, then I am not surprised that you are still single because obviously, you do not want anything more than that. If all you want is for God to give you a spouse, then that is a mind and heart which is based on prosperity principals. And God will not provide a precious gift to someone who has the wrong motives in their heart. I can understand that it gets worrying that it looks hopeless, but examine yourself and see that maybe God will not provide a need to someone who actually doesn't want HIM, but rather wants SOMETHING from him. If God is a prop or a tool to give you a relationship, then I am sorry to be blunt but you deserve to be single. As much as I cannot sleep over this battle of lonliness and frustration myself, I confess that there is something so much greater and glorious and something so much more important. And if you die single , having fought hard this battle on this earth, I have no doubt, ( not sure about scriptures that promise this) but based on my knowledge of God's unchanging character, that you will be rewarded with a hundredfold of spiritual pleasures in eternity.
Perfect answer!
Rewatching this again to prepare myself 😬
I just recently subscribed to this channel and really find the videos informational. I trust God with all of my heart and pray regularly for His WILL to be done. I just hope that if God is going to put "it" in my heart for somebody...that He puts in that person's heart also. ☺I don't have any particular person in my mind at this time but, I do hope it's a true, mutual connection...when it happens. And when He does put in his heart, that the guy will be brave enough to trust God too.
Tamara Hathaway PHILIPPIANS 4:3 well said
I encouraged the guy I like and I didn't even noticed it at the time! 😀
He was listening to a kid with a deficiency that wouldn't stop talking, and I made a joke about how patient he was. ♡♡♡
In my head, it was just a joke. But he looked at me and knew where my heart was. My mouth said a joke, but my heart was saying: wow, you're so patient, I like it so much. ❤️
Yes, you make some good points. I am glad to listen to you talk about this specific subject. Your wife got lucky.
This advice is on point but the challenge is when you want to start something long distance. That in itself is a challenge but then trying to be subtle from another state/location is just not going to work.
How do u talk to him more, without making him feel annoyed/scaring him away😭😭😭I’m so scared that a guy talks to u back/snapchats w u frequently just because he’s the leader of the fellowship, and he has the responsibility to care for each member, esp for new frds.
xin chao...just relax a friend is a good place to start...live in His amazing grace and friendship...then nothing is impossible
Exactly! For me personally I feel like such a child when I date so I’d rather just be friends with the person before hand and see how it goes.
He’s been doing these to me! He’s a very hardworking man so we don’t talk much but when we do it’s for hours❤
Thanks so much for this vid, bro! Some meaty nuggets to knaw upon! May our Lord & Saviour Jesus Christ continue to bless you & your ministry👍💖👑
Amen Disa Jardine, so glad this was helpful to you :)
Appreciate your wisdom and Godly perspective I ve!
I'm about to try the first 2 tomorrow if the guy I like is in church tomorrow. I think he likes me cause he's awkward around me which I find is super adorable. He's so amazing! I've never felt like this about a guy before...
Btw anyone reading this can y'all pray for me? Thanks!
praying the best for you, i am a Messianic Jew...and totally agree with you...except feelings can lead us instead of His guidance..the good shepherd david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com
I think I'm too obvious when I like a guy.. Communication means affection. I just need to know more about the I'm interested with by talking to him more often?Sometimes I talk too much..I think I'm just confused... I'm still naive about men..thank you.please keep on guiding us..I would like to listen more on your videos..God bless You!
just relax...when we are confused ask....and care is important...some talk alot some little we are all different ikr...thanks i am a Messianic Jew...and agree with you...except feelings can lead us instead of His guidance..the good shepherd david777aqua4Jesus gmail.com Wyeth
I just want to say that, though they may be very few, but there are guys who don't easily assume a girl is romantically interested and even feel quite comfortable doing activities such as doing a sport or going to the cinema one on one with a girl they're only friends with and have no other intentions. And it's not just about not seeing the subtle signs but about just being comfortable with such things and not feeling as though these should be anything non-platonic in general. I know someone like this. He said he had to learn to restrain from things that may lead a girl on even though for him personaly those would be just friendship things with someone he values as a person.
Hi
I like you videos very much. At the moment I am struggeling with the question if he is interested or just kind and polite. I find it very hard to make a difference between it. Do you have any advices for that? God bless you!
Great question, I will do a video on that. One tip is to observe his behavior towards others. If he treats you differently that might be a sign he's interested. If he is kind to all then it probably is not a sign he likes you
I got a headache anyone has aspirin? Here I thought us women were complicated. The vid was very informative. I see what I've been doing.
I don't want to be the one who makes the first move. I spent most of my life asking guys out or approaching the man first. I want to do it differently this time.
I really enjoyed this one and I'm probably going to try it out! 😁 Thanks.
So true! I talk to guys very nonchalant and they think I like them.
I believe both if interested should show it in a pure manner but yes us men should open doors and be the gentleman God created us to be.I don't however know how to read minds and a woman who hides her interest expecting a man to pursue her is just not realistic or practical.Yes we should pray about ALL things but sometimes the LORD doesn't give us answers the way we expect either.It should be pre mutual in the beginning stages but as a man i have no problem stepping up because that's my duty as a believer.🙏🙌☝🔥👑
I meet a good man of God at work. We worked together for a year then he got a different job but we still went to church together.We have become really good friends this year. Talking on the phone 2 to 3 times a week, and doing church stuff together. I will not ask him out so I am just enjoying this season and we will see what God has planned.
Thank you for the topics you treat. So relevant!
My pleasure! So glad the videos have been helpful :)
5:42 hahahhaa. That made me smile!
We all need encouragement. I used to be so hypocritical of men but I have learned to edify people with my tongue. Man or woman. :)
Your videos are very helpful. Thank you very much! 👏👏👏💕💕💕
I'm so glad they are helpful to you! God bless!
I really like this guy at my church and I have actually followed all of these things and we have become really good friends and we have a lot of common interests. We now hang out weekly outside of church and church events. We don’t hang out alone, there is always a third friend, but during movies we sit close, not cuddling, but to where our arms are touching even though there is plenty of room to sit elsewhere.
Now, it’s been 2 months and I feel like I like him even more and I feel as if he might feel the same. I’m waiting on God’s timing. And I am also waiting on this guys timing and trying to respect how he wants to pursue. I don’t even know if he has ever had a gf before or perused a woman before. I’m still waiting for a casual non-obvious way to ask him.
Anyway, I don’t know if this is okay, but I’m giving it until July and if he hasn’t expressed to me that he does indeed like me, I’m going to come right out and ask him. I’m praying about it, but I need to know one way or another and I think 6 months is a pretty decent amount of time to hold off and give him the space to go at his own pace.
If he doesn’t feel the same, I need to move on for my own sake because with how much time we spend together, it might prevent the guy who God has for me from pursuing me. Idk can anyone else relate?
I honestly feel like this is the guy God has for me. I have been praying for the past 2 years for the guy I marry to love God more than he loves me, go to my church, and that I not be initially attracted to him. He had been going to my church 6 months before I felt God put it on my heart to reach out to him. He wasn’t my type, but that has now changed.
I invited him hiking and now we go to the gym or hiking every Saturday and we both are into testimonies and content creation and he’s now the audio engineer for my testimony project at church. He also does sweet things like give me a speaker when my radio wasn’t working, he fixed my car key remote so I could unlock my car from a distance, and he has done other things. He’s always eager to help me. So, I feel like he likes me but then again, what if he’s just being nice?
I feel God growing me in patience but man this whole Christian dating thing is tough as someone who lived in the world and has only been saved 4 years. I should also mention, I am 33 and the guy I like is 30. If I was in my early 20’s I’d just ride it out, but at my age, I am looking to settle down and have children.
I appreciate these videos, it’s definitely helped a lot with how Christians should pursue and date each other. I think now I mostly want to know how to go about approaching this guy with my feelings without being pushy.
😮beautiful story. Praying God reveals what this all means. ❤
Amen, a great message given,God bless you🌷🌷🌷
Solid advice! So glad I found your videos because they are biblically sound and encouraging. Bless you!
This was a great video! That was one of the best piece of advice I've heard on the topic! Blessings Marc.
Amen, it's encouraging to hear this, God bless :)
I never thought of encouraging as a healthy way to talk to a Christian guy -- thanks!
Well there is a guy I realised I really liked but I think I was too late to drive that point home because in all the time he sent me signals, I never responded because I was healing from a past relationship.
Now I feel he's right for me. But the old vibe is gone. He's more withdrawn. We are friends I don't want to lose that. But I desire more. Should I tell him that I like him?
dude ur blessed with wisdom