Oookkkk. So what my situation. I tried to end things two months ago. He came back begging. Because I had feelings for him I gave him another chance. A week ago he ended it when I called him out on his bullshit and not doing what he promised he would. He's shy. He doesn't talk (hates it). He's not assertive. I'm currently doing the cold method of defriending him, changing all my passwords, not talking to him. Unfortunately we work together and still cross paths. Out of curiosity -bc I KNOW I'm gonna stand firm and say no if he comes back again - out of curiosity do these guys come back again if they are the one that ended it??
Do you have any good ideas on what to do or how to treat your ex or respond to them when they hit you up and want to get together. Also on what to say. Last time I seen the guy he was sad. He was real toxic and a big ego.
This is SOLID. I literally got back together with an ex - fivevyears later. I inflicted so much of pain after we broke up. I NEVER reached out. He recently said to me : "You have such high standards. I feel like this journey is about to change me." Ladies do not be afraid to lose'Em. And that's how you keep them interested.
Sylvia Montejano. I believe I made him work - enough. I did not go to his place until after four solid dates. I'm 26, still pure. He has a child. But I aim to make him wait till he chooses to marry me. If not, his loss. He is my absolute Twinflame, however - I have done so much spiritual work, I am not willin' to compromise my standards, not even for him. I must say if feels like getting my superpower back. It is refreshin'. The waiting game isn't worth it, however very worth it. ❤
Generally people who r not afraid to louse anything in life like job, house, money, relationship and the strongest but scariest people, because they can’t be controlled, they r the once who control. That when u know you r alive, when no one and nothing has control over you.
Amerokee You should never love another onr more then you love yourself. And when this other one goes against your standards it is an attack on you and you should be able to leave them.
I just recently for the first time had to explain to a guy that I’m seeing that his actions didn’t sit well with me. After I expressed my concerns he appreciated it a lot and started doing more things to make me feel special. I’m 28 years old and I normally would let things slide or cut a guy off without any explanation, showing my shadow self is definitely the better choice.
This video is facts it's called having standards men say they hate them but always come back some try to play games again when they do some rise to meet them. YOU chose which man you let in.
Stand up for yourself ladies this is some bomb ass advice my ex is still chasing me after I ghosted him and told him I was talking to other people hurt their ego take their validation and f*ck it never give it back!!!!!!
I just don’t understand why woman do it or wait until you where broken up? I see so many woman doing this but why not do it while your in the relationship
Spot on advice, absolutely true. It took a long time for me to figure this out. I can be too nice and it isn't healthy and often not authentic. It left me open to getting hurt and taken advantage of. It build resentment. Suppressing my anger only made it come out in worse ways. One has to be able to stand up for themselves or they will be stood on and stood up. Ladies, know your worth. Your anger is your right and your weapon to defend against manipulation disrespect.
Damn you are speaking to me personally. I always tend to people please, be afraid of hurting people and getting on their bad side even when I got walked over many times. It's hard when you're afraid of confrontations and speaking out, but I will definitely use this as fuel to express my emotions, negative ones included. I need to not be afraid of losing them. There's no use in keeping people around if they don't respect you.
3:26 When you don’t like a guy they end up liking you back because you’re sending mixed signals Ignoring them, taking a long time to text them etc 4:11 use pst anger as fuel If you are naturally nice use all the times that people hurt you and made you angry to be able to use your shadow. 6:40 stop people pleasing Stop trying to please people. Become aware of the need to please people, for validation. Be more demanding of people. Start with less important relationships
I’ve actually been acting like this in my current relationship & I just want to say it’s going quite well 👌🏾😂 If Alex says I’m doing it right, then I’m doing it right.
I’m naturally this kind of woman and was told all my life (by women) to change if I wanted a husband. I refused! I still refuse. I know I have a great heart and integrity. I’ve told friends and lovers if you can’t handle the fire once and a while it’s best you find someone else. They always stick around still trying to change me until I put a stop to it for good. and The men seemed to like it though-always longing from a far even after it’s done. Thank you for being confident enough to affirm women like myself. It’s ok not to be perfect and sweet all the time as long as you’re not trying to harm or manipulate or exploit others. Will be joining your patreon tonight. Stay blessed.
To those who don't believe what he's saying, try it and you'll see him chasing you instead of the other way around! Thank you Dalexis, you made me become a stronger person!!
You have that mix of good guy but also a really dark one which makes you extremely unpredictable, I think you are a dark guy that is trying to be his best version which makes you attractive so I guess you're right about embracing the shadow self.
If I tell them: "If you're late again, we won't be hanging out anymore." In my mind, I'm afraid that they will be nonchalant about it and keep disrespecting my demand. I have a fear of abandonment since I only have a friend or two. However, I'm not the confrontational type. But I just build up the anger and remove them from my life without a notice
Yeah, depending on the situation, it's probably better to simply practice being assertive. 1) you show your boundaries 2) you practice seeing possible reactions 3) you stand up for yourself sooner than later I think that would help not becoming a volcano. The lateness seems valid and also small. If it's 5-15 minutes then it's small especially for a date. And if they have a valid excuse. Ghosting is not fun especially with more quality people.
@@pollymat991 I tell them that I feel disrespected, I made that known - they're somewhat flaky and make it out to seem like it's my problem. To an extent I am toxic bc of mental health issues, but I'm trying and I want the same effort recriporated... which is unrealistic. Thank you for your 2 cents guys! P.s. I know this is a dating channel, lmao but I'm talking about friendly relationships 😂😅
@@InshasChoice well, you could also start doing to them what they do to you (getting late to dates/cancel dates) and once they feel disrespected, let them know "you though it was okay since they do it to you" PS. Try to get better friends and new ones cause any person that don't value your time, is not worthy at all.
It took me a serious heartbreak to understand the importance of message you're delivering here. I've always felt guilty for feeling anger and frustration and people made fun of me for feeling this way. But now, my every negative emotion is my weapon.
You can do this without anger & resentment. Forgive people, commend not as they play a part into fulfilment in your desires. Operate from a place of higher-self focus on yourself & LOVE yourself. Naturally attention will be withdrawn
This is definitely me. I’ve always embraced the darker side of my personality & every guy I’ve talked to has reacted the same lmao they just get so enticed. I don’t know why cuz I’m such a bitch😂😂
CassieAfricanQueen totally right you by doing this u can expose the personality of the ppl slowly and know how to deal with them before we all rush together ends up by misunderstandings or issues
This is, by far the best relationship advice I've ever had! For over a year, I've been listening consistently to a lot of popular relationship/life coaches, and none of them brought such imense value to my life. I am playing this over and over, included it into my morning routine, so I don't miss any detail, every word you speak is gold. It's not toxic, it helps us become whole again after having rejected our dark side because indeed, we are being manipulated with guilt for having it in the first place.
What you have done for me is beyond words. My shadow self is always poking at me to be known but I thought I needed to push it back. Now I can see that I was right so many years ago. All the wasted years trying to suppress what I should have embraced! No more! Thank you for putting it into the words I needed to hear.
Yes!! Best advice ever!! Women a predispositioned to be sweet, and we all come with needs, desires, ambition. We cast those things out because we're so tolerable that we don't see the boundaries crossed. But what happens when we start seeing how repeated behaviors effects us? We become resentful!!! Then that resentment grows. It's like a seed that thought gets buried and is just ready to bust through the dirt every time it's watered during every storm it flulourishes more, taking over.
I wish I have watched this 2 years ago, it's empowering and enlightening, its applicability is not only in a romantic relationship but in all kinds of relationships and encounters. Thank you. I can't deny that for the longest time, I've been a people pleaser. It end me being hurt.
This is excellent advice for immature minded men. A real man would accept you exactly how you are. I came out the womb “mean” as people would say then I became nice as I matured. Now, I’m at a healthy balance and see bs right away and learning not to waste my time. I’ll die alone like I came in this world if I can’t find someone who loves me for me.
you know what? This is actually the missing piece for me. I absolutely agree with you. You have helped me understand something that I think is helping me release my shadow. I was getting so mad of being the kindest person and being played everytime I am kind.
7:58 "Why can't they work to stay on your good side?" This is so true. After many bad experiences I adapted this mindset naturally cause I am not gonna be forcing shit. If it doesn't work out, that means it's a protection from getting hurt.
I think I went to far this morning! I didn't just hurt his ego I stamped on it and made my crown and walked away like a Queen 👑 I feel fabulous don't ever let anyone disrespect you bless you all and thankyou father Alex
The web is packed with this kind of coaching, but Alex, you WIN. Because you always show your true self, and never pretend to be the "gentle/professional" coach as scripted. Thanks a lot. Serena ❣️
Its about being polarizing. Say yes and mean it! Say no and mean it! Say what you say and there's no maybe, or giving a shit if you hurt peoples feelings. It really will help weed out and keep people who are in your life for the right reasons!
I just wanted to thank you and I can tell that you truly understand women and that you must love them to give them this advice. I had a guy who is supposed to come over last night and I checked him today and said what happened? He tried to blow it off and just say he was tired from work. After I had listen to your video I told him that next time he needs to let me know and not waste my time and I’ll do the same with him. He started explaining himself and got really respectful and let me know the next time he would definitely not do that again, his bad, this and that. So thank you for letting me be assertive but not necessarily blowing up and being too aggressive or irrational! It got his attention and then I stroked his ego about his job and he praised me on my exams... so it worked it well! 💋💜
"Value people respecting you over anything else" They disrespect you, don't let it slide, demand(in a controlled manner!) accountability . I like that, and never do it - i hold it inside until it comes out on a very uncontrolled attack, which he can then use against me.
Wish I understood the when I was younger. I’ve been putting my foot down in the last couple of years after going through a horrible abusive relationship, & guess what? people don’t like it....feels good to be empowered!
I swear as God is my witness, if I had any cash I’d set up a weekly appointment till I gleaned all the knowledge from your mind! Two kids in college there’s been nothing left since 2007. But I really really want to Sincerely Thank You for your time, your effort, and for sharing stuff that has literally changed my life!
@@suras8984 it may help to learn strategy. That way you're not being mean, just smart and tactile. Or operate from self love that way you have boundaries and have other healthy ways of protecting yourself.
Cath Exactly. Have high standards for yourself and for how people treat you. Once a mofo crosses your boundary or doesn’t meet your standards, cut him off. Give them one chance and then on to the next one.
Thanks for this one. I need to embrace my shadow if I start liking a guy. I got to stop smiling. legit. Use my negative emotion through facial expressions more. This I can definitely do more. I feel like I've embraced the G in me when it comes to men, but this will put the icing on the cake.
You are so wise beyond your years. It’s religious programming such as guilt and turning the other cheek which gets you manipulated. I just realized that the shadow self is in many ways sin. We are taught not to sin etc. Strict religious programming has suppressed this in many people so you end up being inauthentic. This suppresses your power, people can feel it and then violate your boundaries. Everything is energy and you become infinitely more powerful integrating the shadow self
I love you! I loved it when you moved in for your close-up and said, 'I come back!' You're confident enough to say that even though some women could use it against you! Thank you for talking straight to women and helping us :)
This advice is easier to follow for those who were born that way naturally. For those of us born with too much "nice" in our personalities, it's more difficult.
Haha ‘when you don’t know somebody and they show you negative emotions, that startles you a little bit’- last year I was at a concert and my mum was walking the wrong way- this guy shouted at her- and I shouted at him twice as loud- it more than startled him- he did NOT expect it... no one shouts at my mum lol
I’m a Christian but that doesn’t mean I let people treat me bad! You can be nice (to a point) but not let yourself get manipulated. One of the best things that ever happened to me was me being manipulated bc now my eyes are open to it & I will never let it happen again. I’m a sweet girl to an extent but I definitely embrace my mean side lol
“Be willing to walk away” “embrace your negative emotions” Hahah I love this video. I try so hard to be nice and I get fucked over.. but you’re right, when I stand my ground no apologies, I get more respect and guys like me more. Ok! I gotchu!! Thank you! Lol
One main thing I’ve learned from this channel is. YOU CAN NOT APPLY THESE TECHNIQUES AS “TIPS AND TRICKS.” You need to get to the root of the problem of why your relationships always fail, why you’re a “nice girl”, why you let take advantage of you, why you’re so needy. ALL OF THIS STEMS FROM LACK OF CONFIDENCE AND/OR INTERNAL TRAUMA. Improve your confidence and you will naturally apply the techniques he discusses without having to be instructed. Trying to apply his tips without working on the core issues will be noticeably forced and will never work.
Your description in breaking things down is profound. Simple yet profound. I can identify the things I do and the things I don't. I do most of these things but there's one thing I will master, the Sexual competition, in another video. Also inflicting pain on men, in this video. Like, this is really getting interesting as a single woman, type thing.
I really love this video. It’s just for me. I’m always scared of rejection so I always try to please people even when I’m hurt. Thanks so much for this
Amazing way of thinking, embrace your shadow...at some point I was exposing more of my shadow self and I couldn't understand why it is so interesting to be as so with people but truth is that it is the most magnetic and interesting part of you. This is the best advice everyone should consider it(not only for impressing guys)
Ty ty ty ty u know me and we have never met. I have known this about myself at Age 10. I have lived this way for 40 yrs. And have had a good life. Not everyone can say this but here I am . Proof that what u say is possible. Ur the shit . I think we would be great pals dude . Meet ur Tia Jack jack from S Cali.
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I think you are super cute and your accent
I love your advice.. i love it :)
Oookkkk. So what my situation. I tried to end things two months ago. He came back begging. Because I had feelings for him I gave him another chance. A week ago he ended it when I called him out on his bullshit and not doing what he promised he would. He's shy. He doesn't talk (hates it). He's not assertive. I'm currently doing the cold method of defriending him, changing all my passwords, not talking to him. Unfortunately we work together and still cross paths. Out of curiosity -bc I KNOW I'm gonna stand firm and say no if he comes back again - out of curiosity do these guys come back again if they are the one that ended it??
Do you have any good ideas on what to do or how to treat your ex or respond to them when they hit you up and want to get together. Also on what to say. Last time I seen the guy he was sad. He was real toxic and a big ego.
You're cute you kind of remind me of the weeknd you're cute once again.
"Be colder with people in the beginning, so they can earn your warmth!"
This
Or u’ll attract someone emotionally unavailable
This works
Well that works for a certain time but afterwards, they understand your game and pull away.
This is SOLID. I literally got back together with an ex - fivevyears later. I inflicted so much of pain after we broke up. I NEVER reached out. He recently said to me : "You have such high standards. I feel like this journey is about to change me."
Ladies do not be afraid to lose'Em. And that's how you keep them interested.
❤ loved this
Sylvia Montejano. I believe I made him work - enough. I did not go to his place until after four solid dates. I'm 26, still pure. He has a child. But I aim to make him wait till he chooses to marry me. If not, his loss. He is my absolute Twinflame, however - I have done so much spiritual work, I am not willin' to compromise my standards, not even for him.
I must say if feels like getting my superpower back. It is refreshin'. The waiting game isn't worth it, however very worth it. ❤
Do you mind emailing me please? I want to ask you something its janellmelisa@gmail.com
Janell Melisa - sure thing.
@@substancenotvibes.4914 thank you!
Remember that: nice people get manipulated
even if youre not some will still try
I will put this sentence on my desktop (and on my car).
*People pleasers get manipulated*
I was exactly the girl whose religion taught you were basically going to hell if you didnt forgive and forget everyone for everything.
@Amerokee yess I heard that on Michaela pinks channel I was shocked
You are LITERALLY giving GOLD to people.
💪
Facts
Am a proud golddigger 😂🤣
Dalexis famous phrase, “be willing to walk away”. Great video.
Thanks Raquel
I totally agree
Generally people who r not afraid to louse anything in life like job, house, money, relationship and the strongest but scariest people, because they can’t be controlled, they r the once who control. That when u know you r alive, when no one and nothing has control over you.
Whenever this statement crosses me, I read it with Alex's voice
Who's Dalexis?
So basically treat them likre you dont want them.
Yes.
More nuanced than that. Just have standards and stick by them.
No, treat them like you don’t care about losing them (cause you shouldn’t anyways)
Amerokee
You should never love another onr more then you love yourself. And when this other one goes against your standards it is an attack on you and you should be able to leave them.
Just dnt want him until he's nice to u. Shouldn't be an act! I hate ppl tht treat me like sh*t!
Why can't mean people change and be nice, why is it that its nice people that have to change and be mean this world is fucked up
Cause the power lies with whom cares less. It's sad, but it's life.
There’s too much niceness in the world, standing up for ourselves is a good thing ☺️
Because mean people are acting nice more often than we know
I know..it sucks. But it’s balance.
Millicent Akoth Not necessarily, It’s simply about balance.
“Nice people get manipulated “ soooo true! 🤦🏽♀️ lesson learned
I just recently for the first time had to explain to a guy that I’m seeing that his actions didn’t sit well with me. After I expressed my concerns he appreciated it a lot and started doing more things to make me feel special. I’m 28 years old and I normally would let things slide or cut a guy off without any explanation, showing my shadow self is definitely the better choice.
I need to listen to this video everyday in the morning
i was thinking d same too.😂
And listen to it over and over.
For Real!! Great idea 💕💕💕
Dude! 😂👌🏾
Same!!!! Maybe it will actually, finally do me some good!!!!!
This video is facts it's called having standards men say they hate them but always come back some try to play games again when they do some rise to meet them. YOU chose which man you let in.
Even without a shirt, i can still take you seriously. Your content is so valuable. Thanks!
😂😂🤣
I never thought about this. Wow. Good point. I didn't even notice he is shirtless
I noticed. Oh yeah
Can't let people take advantage of you. This is so true if you're too nice. The best one yet!
@Amerokee thanks, I will
Stand up for yourself ladies this is some bomb ass advice my ex is still chasing me after I ghosted him and told him I was talking to other people hurt their ego take their validation and f*ck it never give it back!!!!!!
*”Become a (potential) threat to his self-esteem”* 👏
Stop people pleasing ladies! ⚖️ Boundaries.
Embrace confrontation. Respect yourself.
Ladies ! Make sure that your shadow over shadows his
citygirl212 what do you precisely mean?
This is gold. "Value respect over everything and things will fall into place" ~ Alex
Being too nice doesn’t work.
Exactly
Mindful Attraction 2.0 is the
Mindful Attraction 2.0 f
Mindful Attraction 2.0 high
yep! I lost 90 pounds in less than a year and look good just to make him regret leaving me. Oh boy did he regret it!
Congrats Erin!!
I just don’t understand why woman do it or wait until you where broken up? I see so many woman doing this but why not do it while your in the relationship
Perfect revenge!
@@naomikrahn1944 because usually the guys make you feel like crap.
@@marissajustice2411 they do your right.. probably no motivation to do it. Dating the wrong guy also does that
Make people sense the coldness in the beginning before they sense your warmth 🙌🙌🙌
Spot on advice, absolutely true. It took a long time for me to figure this out. I can be too nice and it isn't healthy and often not authentic. It left me open to getting hurt and taken advantage of. It build resentment. Suppressing my anger only made it come out in worse ways. One has to be able to stand up for themselves or they will be stood on and stood up.
Ladies, know your worth. Your anger is your right and your weapon to defend against manipulation disrespect.
Damn you are speaking to me personally. I always tend to people please, be afraid of hurting people and getting on their bad side even when I got walked over many times. It's hard when you're afraid of confrontations and speaking out, but I will definitely use this as fuel to express my emotions, negative ones included. I need to not be afraid of losing them. There's no use in keeping people around if they don't respect you.
3:26
When you don’t like a guy they end up liking you back because you’re sending mixed signals
Ignoring them, taking a long time to text them etc
4:11 use pst anger as fuel
If you are naturally nice use all the times that people hurt you and made you angry to be able to use your shadow.
6:40 stop people pleasing
Stop trying to please people. Become aware of the need to please people, for validation.
Be more demanding of people. Start with less important relationships
I’ve actually been acting like this in my current relationship & I just want to say it’s going quite well 👌🏾😂 If Alex says I’m doing it right, then I’m doing it right.
I’m naturally this kind of woman and was told all my life (by women) to change if I wanted a husband. I refused! I still refuse. I know I have a great heart and integrity. I’ve told friends and lovers if you can’t handle the fire once and a while it’s best you find someone else. They always stick around still trying to change me until I put a stop to it for good. and The men seemed to like it though-always longing from a far even after it’s done. Thank you for being confident enough to affirm women like myself. It’s ok not to be perfect and sweet all the time as long as you’re not trying to harm or manipulate or exploit others. Will be joining your patreon tonight. Stay blessed.
To those who don't believe what he's saying, try it and you'll see him chasing you instead of the other way around! Thank you Dalexis, you made me become a stronger person!!
This is a good video on "self respect", man. Good topic.
Thank you
If you're in jail and not willing to shank someone, you're going to get shanked!😂 Priceless!
You have that mix of good guy but also a really dark one which makes you extremely unpredictable, I think you are a dark guy that is trying to be his best version which makes you attractive so I guess you're right about embracing the shadow self.
If I tell them: "If you're late again, we won't be hanging out anymore."
In my mind, I'm afraid that they will be nonchalant about it and keep disrespecting my demand. I have a fear of abandonment since I only have a friend or two.
However, I'm not the confrontational type. But I just build up the anger and remove them from my life without a notice
You’re passive aggressive. Be assertive and follow through with your threats, or you’re nothing but a toxic person.
Yeah, depending on the situation, it's probably better to simply practice being assertive. 1) you show your boundaries 2) you practice seeing possible reactions 3) you stand up for yourself sooner than later
I think that would help not becoming a volcano.
The lateness seems valid and also small. If it's 5-15 minutes then it's small especially for a date. And if they have a valid excuse.
Ghosting is not fun especially with more quality people.
@@pollymat991 I tell them that I feel disrespected, I made that known - they're somewhat flaky and make it out to seem like it's my problem. To an extent I am toxic bc of mental health issues, but I'm trying and I want the same effort recriporated... which is unrealistic. Thank you for your 2 cents guys! P.s. I know this is a dating channel, lmao but I'm talking about friendly relationships 😂😅
@@InshasChoice well, you could also start doing to them what they do to you (getting late to dates/cancel dates) and once they feel disrespected, let them know "you though it was okay since they do it to you"
PS. Try to get better friends and new ones cause any person that don't value your time, is not worthy at all.
I used to be the same way. Unfortunately, you will be shitted on until you teach yourself how to speak up early and often. “No” & “I don’t like that”
It took me a serious heartbreak to understand the importance of message you're delivering here. I've always felt guilty for feeling anger and frustration and people made fun of me for feeling this way. But now, my every negative emotion is my weapon.
Brilliant video, Alex. I agree 100. You are totally right. You can be kind but it does not mean to let them walk over you. Thx.
You can do this without anger & resentment. Forgive people, commend not as they play a part into fulfilment in your desires. Operate from a place of higher-self focus on yourself & LOVE yourself. Naturally attention will be withdrawn
This is definitely me. I’ve always embraced the darker side of my personality & every guy I’ve talked to has reacted the same lmao they just get so enticed. I don’t know why cuz I’m such a bitch😂😂
Anna sameee jajaja
And mind you, you didn't keep any of them so how is this a thing that keeps a guy interested? 🤔
Nokss __ where in my comment did I say I never kept any of them
You’ll get used big time, kinda’ sad in the long run.
Use this in the workplace too not just a relationship
CassieAfricanQueen totally right you by doing this u can expose the personality of the ppl slowly and know how to deal with them before we all rush together ends up by misunderstandings or issues
Everyday.
🤣
✔️💯💯
This is, by far the best relationship advice I've ever had! For over a year, I've been listening consistently to a lot of popular relationship/life coaches, and none of them brought such imense value to my life. I am playing this over and over, included it into my morning routine, so I don't miss any detail, every word you speak is gold. It's not toxic, it helps us become whole again after having rejected our dark side because indeed, we are being manipulated with guilt for having it in the first place.
What you have done for me is beyond words. My shadow self is always poking at me to be known but I thought I needed to push it back. Now I can see that I was right so many years ago. All the wasted years trying to suppress what I should have embraced! No more! Thank you for putting it into the words I needed to hear.
Yes!! Best advice ever!! Women a predispositioned to be sweet, and we all come with needs, desires, ambition. We cast those things out because we're so tolerable that we don't see the boundaries crossed. But what happens when we start seeing how repeated behaviors effects us? We become resentful!!! Then that resentment grows. It's like a seed that thought gets buried and is just ready to bust through the dirt every time it's watered during every storm it flulourishes more, taking over.
I'm ole school and this is straight putting people up on game. Big Pimpin' Dalexis. FACTS💯😉👍🏽
i really like your approach. SICK and tired of ALLOWING people to disrespect me. I always wait till i snap
you are my main source of calmness whenever im about to react out of anxiety and do something stupid. Thanks Alex!❤️
I wish I have watched this 2 years ago, it's empowering and enlightening, its applicability is not only in a romantic relationship but in all kinds of relationships and encounters. Thank you. I can't deny that for the longest time, I've been a people pleaser. It end me being hurt.
U guys are afraid of pretty assertive women.
Every guy I've ever broken up with still hits me up from time to time.
This is excellent advice for immature minded men. A real man would accept you exactly how you are. I came out the womb “mean” as people would say then I became nice as I matured. Now, I’m at a healthy balance and see bs right away and learning not to waste my time. I’ll die alone like I came in this world if I can’t find someone who loves me for me.
we are never alone we have ancestors and angels on the other side and when we pass they will be there to guide us-dying alone is a lie
😂😂this was so entertaining! Advice from a half naked man on TH-cam...🤭 so different than the usual coaches I watch..”I’ll come back” 😂😂😂
Even the guy I dated years ago openly told me I was "too nice"...damn, it's crazy...and it's crazy that I stayed in spite of everything.
In fact we all are inmates in one giant prison (Earth). That's why these rules are valid.
Show emotions with your face with people you don't know. Embrace negative emotions
you know what? This is actually the missing piece for me. I absolutely agree with you. You have helped me understand something that I think is helping me release my shadow. I was getting so mad of being the kindest person and being played everytime I am kind.
"Value people respecting you Over Everything!"
Be demanding say what you want. Demand your respect and follow through.
I'm living testimony, absolute facts!
I'm nice and have been manipulated by both males and females.
But no more!!!
I got enough of being a good girl, my goal now is to break a guys’ hearts as many as I can 😅 go into the game field now…!
7:58 "Why can't they work to stay on your good side?" This is so true. After many bad experiences I adapted this mindset naturally cause I am not gonna be forcing shit. If it doesn't work out, that means it's a protection from getting hurt.
“I come back”
I wouldn’t expect any less from you -
embrace showing your negative emotions. communiicate that way with people you want to leave behind. He is saying what i think
The first time u make a real good video. About self respect, do more shit like that love ittt
Every video...I break the chain of people pleasing. I can't thank you enough. 💯
I think I went to far this morning! I didn't just hurt his ego I stamped on it and made my crown and walked away like a Queen 👑 I feel fabulous don't ever let anyone disrespect you bless you all and thankyou father Alex
The realist dating coach ever. I love you alex
The web is packed with this kind of coaching, but Alex, you WIN. Because you always show your true self, and never pretend to be the "gentle/professional" coach as scripted. Thanks a lot. Serena ❣️
Its about being polarizing. Say yes and mean it! Say no and mean it! Say what you say and there's no maybe, or giving a shit if you hurt peoples feelings. It really will help weed out and keep people who are in your life for the right reasons!
I just wanted to thank you and I can tell that you truly understand women and that you must love them to give them this advice. I had a guy who is supposed to come over last night and I checked him today and said what happened? He tried to blow it off and just say he was tired from work. After I had listen to your video I told him that next time he needs to let me know and not waste my time and I’ll do the same with him. He started explaining himself and got really respectful and let me know the next time he would definitely not do that again, his bad, this and that. So thank you for letting me be assertive but not necessarily blowing up and being too aggressive or irrational! It got his attention and then I stroked his ego about his job and he praised me on my exams... so it worked it well! 💋💜
"Value people respecting you over anything else" They disrespect you, don't let it slide, demand(in a controlled manner!) accountability .
I like that, and never do it - i hold it inside until it comes out on a very uncontrolled attack, which he can then use against me.
Wish I understood the when I was younger. I’ve been putting my foot down in the last couple of years after going through a horrible abusive relationship, & guess what? people don’t like it....feels good to be empowered!
I swear as God is my witness, if I had any cash I’d set up a weekly appointment till I gleaned all the knowledge from your mind! Two kids in college there’s been nothing left since 2007. But I really really want to Sincerely Thank You for your time, your effort, and for sharing stuff that has literally changed my life!
I wish u were my friend. I mean u are someone I could talk to about everything because u are different and interesting.. thats rare.
I can relate with this on all levels. I’m too nice but i find it hard to be mean. Great points 👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾
me too. But I usually wait until its a pattern and then I snap.
😂😂
@@suras8984 it may help to learn strategy. That way you're not being mean, just smart and tactile. Or operate from self love that way you have boundaries and have other healthy ways of protecting yourself.
It’s not being mean - just no more people pleasing
Cath Exactly. Have high standards for yourself and for how people treat you. Once a mofo crosses your boundary or doesn’t meet your standards, cut him off. Give them one chance and then on to the next one.
Thanks for this one. I need to embrace my shadow if I start liking a guy. I got to stop smiling. legit. Use my negative emotion through facial expressions more. This I can definitely do more. I feel like I've embraced the G in me when it comes to men, but this will put the icing on the cake.
Could you do more on masculinity in women. I have become so masculine and I don't like it!!! I was not like this before.
Watch Helena Hart on TH-cam
@@starvega144 no , what is it?
@@vhayashi7369 thnq ❤ will do
Take some dancing classes like salsa, casino, pole dancing or even Zumba, etc. You will feel your femininity immediately.
@@1maybeline thnx this seems really helpful
Makes me feel better about me sticking up for myself..... People make me feel like I shouldn't but 🦆 that
Trust me, I have no problem showing negative emotion with my face😂🤷🏻♀️ but thanks I’m gonna use some of these tips!!
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 8:55 "I Come Back " I Respect it, you keep it real across the board i give you that. You advise men and women on what they should do
Watching.. officially on lock down
damn. needed to hear this. be willing to fight and not willing to compromise.
You are so wise beyond your years. It’s religious programming such as guilt and turning the other cheek which gets you manipulated. I just realized that the shadow self is in many ways sin. We are taught not to sin etc. Strict religious programming has suppressed this in many people so you end up being inauthentic. This suppresses your power, people can feel it and then violate your boundaries. Everything is energy and you become infinitely more powerful integrating the shadow self
I love you! I loved it when you moved in for your close-up and said, 'I come back!' You're confident enough to say that even though some women could use it against you! Thank you for talking straight to women and helping us :)
This advice is easier to follow for those who were born that way naturally. For those of us born with too much "nice" in our personalities, it's more difficult.
You need to watch more of sheraseven
Haha ‘when you don’t know somebody and they show you negative emotions, that startles you a little bit’- last year I was at a concert and my mum was walking the wrong way- this guy shouted at her- and I shouted at him twice as loud- it more than startled him- he did NOT expect it... no one shouts at my mum lol
I’m a Christian but that doesn’t mean I let people treat me bad! You can be nice (to a point) but not let yourself get manipulated. One of the best things that ever happened to me was me being manipulated bc now my eyes are open to it & I will never let it happen again. I’m a sweet girl to an extent but I definitely embrace my mean side lol
“Zero respect behind that” - deep.
I’m about to replay
I love you, I am just using your advice, it works!!!! You really love women, beautiful soul
“Be willing to walk away” “embrace your negative emotions” Hahah I love this video. I try so hard to be nice and I get fucked over.. but you’re right, when I stand my ground no apologies, I get more respect and guys like me more. Ok! I gotchu!! Thank you! Lol
“nice people get manipulated” yup i learned that the hard way smh
Same here.
Me too
One main thing I’ve learned from this channel is. YOU CAN NOT APPLY THESE TECHNIQUES AS “TIPS AND TRICKS.” You need to get to the root of the problem of why your relationships always fail, why you’re a “nice girl”, why you let take advantage of you, why you’re so needy. ALL OF THIS STEMS FROM LACK OF CONFIDENCE AND/OR INTERNAL TRAUMA. Improve your confidence and you will naturally apply the techniques he discusses without having to be instructed. Trying to apply his tips without working on the core issues will be noticeably forced and will never work.
Your description in breaking things down is profound. Simple yet profound. I can identify the things I do and the things I don't. I do most of these things but there's one thing I will master, the Sexual competition, in another video. Also inflicting pain on men, in this video. Like, this is really getting interesting as a single woman, type thing.
I really love this video. It’s just for me. I’m always scared of rejection so I always try to please people even when I’m hurt. Thanks so much for this
This is REAL. This dude is gonna make a fantastic girl dad
Amazing way of thinking, embrace your shadow...at some point I was exposing more of my shadow self and I couldn't understand why it is so interesting to be as so with people but truth is that it is the most magnetic and interesting part of you. This is the best advice everyone should consider it(not only for impressing guys)
6:44 I transitioned into a Dark Angel tonight. Thank you Alex
You’re inflicting the “hay bendito!!!!” Lol 😂
Actually it sounds to me: "love yourself more than other people".. If you love yourself then you stand out for yourself and put up boundaires...
You explain facts in a way that no one else ever does.
You are the best!!
Ty ty ty ty u know me and we have never met. I have known this about myself at Age 10. I have lived this way for 40 yrs. And have had a good life. Not everyone can say this but here I am . Proof that what u say is possible. Ur the shit . I think we would be great pals dude . Meet ur Tia
Jack jack from S Cali.
The passion you expressed in this video lmao 🤣
Had me cracking up with the serious face, “I come back”
Boom u know ur stuff dalexis
Honestly one of the best advise I ever heard on yutube!!! Thank you very much for your great work and priceless help 👌♥️ May God bless you 🙏