When To Stop Helping People
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ธ.ค. 2020
- #radicalselfrespect #codependency #boundaries
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Here is the link to Being Better’s TH-cam channelZ
/ beingbetter
She chronicles her struggles with agoraphobia and I highly recommend checking her channel out.
Today I answer a viewer question from the TH-cam channel Being Better. She asks when she should stop helping her sister and how to reserve more of her sympathy and empathy for her husband and children.
I am Autistic. There is someone (Who is autistic as well) in the other room from me that is always dumping their troubles onto their friends. My dorm is basically a converted shoe factory. One of the walls in the suites is not a complete wall, the top is exposed. I always have to listen to this. At full volume. I can't turn it down. I can't tune it out. I didn't ask to hear it. I can't walk away in the middle of the night. I hear every conversation. I hear all the drama.
Thanks for helping me get a grasp on this question, I appreciate it. What I found most important is to first find out if the person is actually trying to help themself.
Anytime! Thanks for watching and thanks for the question!
I would like to learn more about how to not be co dependant. I was helping people and I did have some expectation like for example responding to a text I would send that person. I couldn't expect even the most basic of friendship gestures from them. Since then we've course had a falling-out and they trash talk me. I feel all the work I did for them they did not appreciate. Now I find myself stuck helping another person who doesn't want to help themselves. They are stuck in the same loop that they've always been in.
I can definitely help you with that.
Irene Lyon and Damien Bohler are great resources. Gotta see what the body is holding on to.
I have stopped helping the ungrateful assholes in my life. I have seen an improvement in my own personal energy. I live a solitary life now because other people only like to take whatever they can get from others and not give anything in return. I am learning to expect nothing in life, then there are no disappointments.
I used to help my sister but she don't want to help herself don't want to do anything for herself and on top she into drugs drinking and I'm seeking God I don't want to be around drugs and drinking she's so needy and feel entitled I'm done? 60 no license no job I can't
Yea you gotta do what’s best for you
I'm only watching this video just to hear your insight but I don't have a problem with knowing when to stop helping people or even if I should Start helping them to begin with. Having a family member who has ALWAYS borrowed/asked people for money their entire adult life, I know majority of the reasons how and why folks are always seeking "help" and handouts. They're typically the SAME folks who never get ahead because they don't reach beyond to help themselves. They are codependent on others and they stay there until people cut them off or they die.
You mentions Rollo Tomassi, you got my respect.
He is brilliant
@5:00 i totally relate dude.. fuck its nuts man
Yea it’s weird. I enjoyed it in a way, but it certainly didn’t end well
@@jaredmello it definitely has its benefits sometimes..haha 🤷🏻♂️
Thank you so much!!!! How do I heal burnout after I realize I was doing this?
Your welcome! I’d say put yourself first, help yourself by treating yourself like someone you need to help. Don’t be afraid to tell others no and make sure your boundaries are firm
🥺👌🏽
What about helping a girl with all her issues, and when I have an issue, she is not there for me ?
Her actions speak loudly
@@jaredmello Thanks for the reply. I am removing this person from my life. Should I even make her aware of why I will no longer be at her beck & call?