Can I Stop Obsessing About Someone?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 191

  • @olivtrees8749
    @olivtrees8749 6 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    I think I'm obsessed with someone, but I don't want to be with them. I'm just really fascinated by them because they don't make any sense to me and there's a part of my brain that REALLY wants to make sense of them!

  • @jennawarbles6297
    @jennawarbles6297 6 ปีที่แล้ว +179

    Steps:
    1. Get distance from that person-in person and online.
    2. Stop feeding the obsession- stop talking about them.
    3. Distract- have some tasks/ activities.
    =Don't feed the obsession. Then you will have time to do things you need/ want to do.

    • @loreleisharp9298
      @loreleisharp9298 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I actually really appreciate that thanks

    • @Davidbowieissosilly
      @Davidbowieissosilly 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ya but it’s hard

    • @raodenraoden9796
      @raodenraoden9796 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The answer to the question starts at 3:11

    • @stevehowell2910
      @stevehowell2910 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Davidbowieissosilly I know that its hard I'm going through it myself right now. But if we take each day and each hour at a time we can get through this. Time Changes Every Thing.

    • @Blueline3691
      @Blueline3691 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Did that and every few months still reminded of them in the weirdest places. I hate my brain.

  • @eliciagarcia9411
    @eliciagarcia9411 6 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    Distracting yourself with projects and goals is literally a solution to so many internal issues.

  • @katiesmith8501
    @katiesmith8501 8 ปีที่แล้ว +187

    I had an obsession with a TH-cam celebrity who was actually quite nasty to me in the comment section of one of his videos one day. That basically ruined it for me but my brain wouldn't let him go so, of course I unsubscribed from everything of his, cleared my Internet history and my TH-cam watch history so that his videos would not pop up in my recommendations anymore and most importantly whenever I found him popping up in my head I would stop and say these exact words:
    Go away, (his name). You have been evicted.
    This proved to actually be incredibly helpful! If images or thoughts of him would persist, I would basically find ways to restate the same thing, "Get out of my head, you aren't allowed here anymore. I have kicked you out. You are not welcome here. Go away and don't come back."
    Believe it or not it works pretty well!

    • @HADASDAS2
      @HADASDAS2 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Katie Smith
      I’m so happy to hear that I mean read that ..
      I think I was in a toxic relationship.. I need to do the same
      Thank you 🙏

    • @davidlinch2130
      @davidlinch2130 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I have spent months researching how to get any man you want and found a fantastic resource at Maras Magic Words (google it if you're interested)

    • @ramintaurbonaviciute9736
      @ramintaurbonaviciute9736 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I have a similar story, I was quite obsessed with this one blogger and he commissioned me to design him some t-shirts. It was all great, for a while we chatted on FB and he was so interesting and fun to chat with, but one day... he started asking to do illustrations for him for free and it ruined it because I hated people like that. I still read his blog, but obsession is now gone completely

    • @swish6754
      @swish6754 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Katie Smith I like that

    • @lorisiccia5914
      @lorisiccia5914 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Katie Smith love this.. ill have to try it.. i find there are a few negative people in my life or ones that things were going well with..then poof dissapeared..no explanation as to why..or if it was something i did..for future reference on what not todo..
      They are all livin rent free in my head.. so i love your idea.. you are evicted.. you are no longer allowed here.. get out.
      Great comment. Going to try it

  • @4psuche911
    @4psuche911 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Anyone ever had an "angry obsession"? Like you're not any less obsessed with the person, but the fixation is centered around your anger toward them? Idk what this is called, but I've experienced it twice.

    • @kendrakane8400
      @kendrakane8400 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes! That’s why I am here. I feel like if I sort through my feelings/anger towards this person almost everyday it can prevent me from hating them. I’m working so hard to not hate someone. It takes a lot of time and energy.

    • @neuroticgurl0295
      @neuroticgurl0295 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      no bcuz everything they do pisses u off to no end even tho i know its not their fault (sometimes ahah)

  • @bananafanafoferry6970
    @bananafanafoferry6970 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    The worst part of BPD, for me anyway, is the obsession with random men. Many of them are attracted to me at first, then I begin to let my overwhelming tendencies take ahold of the situation and the whole thing blows up. I feel like this woman simplifies things. Like it’s all a choice. If I could just choose to feel better don’t you think I would? Meds can help, but it’s an ordeal to find the right combo that will work for you. Even that won’t last the rest of your life. Living with mental illness has destroyed so many things in my life. Pain and abandonment are always the result of it. My brain causes me to bring about the very thing I fear the most. Being rejected by men I adore because I cannot keep my self destructive impulses in check.

  • @zaraali773
    @zaraali773 6 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    The person i was "obsessed' with is in all of my classes and sits very close to me so its very hard to distance myself

  • @ChristinaMonowheat
    @ChristinaMonowheat 9 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Only just watched this, I had to completely cut someone from my life in order to stop the obsession they triggered in me. I destroyed everything that related to the obsession and, over time, got through it.
    Also, in my opinion it's the little things in life that make it better. We just have to choose to see them. :) Today I found a pair of earrings that I'd previously thought I'd lost. Whoop!

    • @theantagonist7677
      @theantagonist7677 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Its hard. Finding soul mates happens all the time. Its not a universal god relationship. It is just someone you vibe with

    • @theantagonist7677
      @theantagonist7677 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      If its not mutual they are start to become legendary to you. And you learn why they deserve someone who has theyre dreams in mind

  • @kevinherrington5563
    @kevinherrington5563 8 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    You kinda blasted through your answer of how to deal with an obsession. Please revisit in detail sometime soon.

  • @jofernie1926
    @jofernie1926 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Kati - you're a breath of fresh air. To the last comment, I am diagnosed Bi- polar - It was initially diagnosed 12yrs ago. I was reluctant to tell anyone, even my nearest and dearest. Admitting to my self, slowly accepting it has been challenging. I truly believe I've been bi-polar since the age of 11. Eventually accepting this and above all, being honest with myself, gave me the opportunity to accept treatment and correct medication. The answer to your question, - no, you do not need meds for life - but have them for the difficult times. Keep talking, keep asking for help and above all feel no shame; being bi-polar does not make you less than, it does not make you a bad person, intact it brings many good qualities. Some of the greatest people are bi-polar. Winston Churchill, Stephen Fry ... I could go on and on. Own it, accept it and more importantly learn to love yourself for you. The more understanding we have about ourselves, the more love we give back. Thanks again Kati for all your positiveness and sound words x

  • @LISUBEE1
    @LISUBEE1 10 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    as to question #1: if they don't know just say something like "yeah i think I lost a bit" and talk about something else. If they insist and you don't want to talk about it say something like "That's a long and complicated story you know"... It's not the perfect thing to say but in my experience people stop asking. And sometimes it's for the best when you don't feel ready to talk.

  • @iris__and_rhizomes
    @iris__and_rhizomes 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Wow! Great video, Kati! My therapists have a tendency to push me so hard. I have fibromyalgia and some kind of autoimmune disorder (docs aren't sure what exactly), so I am fatigued much of the time. I have had this problem with my family and therapists for so long that it was really starting to make me feel like I'm just lazy and just not trying hard enough. My friends who know me well understand that this is not the case because they watch me struggle constantly, always trying to do better and be better.
    I've started to realize how much this is backfiring in my life and undermining my self-efficacy. Your video came into my life at the exact right time.
    It's hard when the "authority figures" in my life continually harp on me to try harder when I'm already past my limit. Thank you for urging patience and acceptance of myself. Like you said, there's nothing I can do about the illnesses, so best to work with the reality of the situation.

    • @denacarson32
      @denacarson32 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jori Church totally understand that. I feel the same way everyday since I can't do the things I used to be able to do whether it's bc of a physical problem (bc I have many right now) or a mental standpoint. I feel like my family still thinks I can be the 50 hr a week hard worker and the super Mom who runs her kids around constantly. I can't even drive anymore per Drs orders.
      So I completely empathize. I hope things have gotten better for you.

  • @CherryBlossom-dj2xd
    @CherryBlossom-dj2xd 10 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I am going to stay positive on thanksgiving even though I'm not going to see half of my family!

  • @Aces00
    @Aces00 7 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    I'm in love with and obsessing over a friend. I asked her out and she rejected me and is avoiding me completely and it hurts. It's been a little over two months of her distancing from me and its only gotten worse. Everyday I think about how much I want to die because life isn't worth living without her, and she seems to just hate me.

  • @shaneadams589
    @shaneadams589 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    You should make a video of a stimulation of a therapy session. Therapy is basically impossible for me atm but I'm interested in how therapy works exactly. I'm so thankful of all your constant efforts for us Kati ❤️💜 you've been one of my biggest helpers in all my recovery.

  • @Shadseaweed
    @Shadseaweed 7 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    what if you have ocd. and your obsessive over a person. it's been 20yrs and I'm still obsessing. she's not right for me. but i can't let it go.

    • @citizencain454
      @citizencain454 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Ron Don , love yourself enough to find someone who wants you in their life. And let those who don’t, go.

    • @citizencain454
      @citizencain454 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That, and watch Corey Wayne. He helps.

    • @christiangarza4836
      @christiangarza4836 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thanks for making me feel like I won’t ever forget her 😂

    • @yourmama3515
      @yourmama3515 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I feel u man. I’ve been obsessed with this girl i will never see, since early teenage years and now im 18. My obsession over her is still growing. Can’t seem to stop it

    • @fredericmoresmau4303
      @fredericmoresmau4303 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Ron Don Sure way is to leave the countrY Detox für 4 Months start New be free finally Stunde they betrayed me of a Life.....

  • @Failycia
    @Failycia 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Thank you for your videos! I wanted to ask, how about getting rid of that really empty feeling when you finally stop obsessing over someone? what do you do when you find yourself depressed after you stop obsessing and you almost want to go back to it?

  • @food4444lyfe
    @food4444lyfe 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    I thought " Distance makes the heart grow fonder " ?? 😭😭

  • @ericaswanberg8641
    @ericaswanberg8641 6 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    Distraction... lady, I can't get out of bed because of this depression I'm in

  • @daniiiakasha1436
    @daniiiakasha1436 9 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Hi Kati. I'm having a rough time obsessing over an old flame. He was a high school friend whom I rekindled a relationship with later online. I think of him every now and then. Lately, its been abnormal. Two years ago, he sent me a suicide message and disappeared. When I contacted his mom on Facebook to see how he was, he got.mad and said that was a stalker move. I was in love, but I know he has his share of.problems. I just wish I could stop thinking of him and move on

  • @82dreamdancer
    @82dreamdancer 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Kati, As someone who has had CFS for over 5 years (and to say it turned my life upside down is an understatement), I really appreciate the sensitivity and respect that you showed in your response to Question #3.
    To the person who asked the question, CFS impacts every facet of your life, and it's a tough run, but you CAN do it. What Kati has said is completely right. In my personal experience, the moment that I was able to let go of all my expectations and self-criticism over what I felt I should and shouldn't be doing/having, was the moment things began to gradually get easier. But it's a process. And you do have to be patient. It really helped me to understand that chronic illness generally requires a big adjustment in your life - and we grieve for what we had, and what we wanted for our future. If you can read some literature on the grief process, I honestly believe you will relate well to it.
    What I want to say most is hang in there. Don't give in. CFS doesn't mean you can't achieve the things you wanted to in life - you may just have to go a different way about it. And sometimes you have to feel like you're going 'backwards' to move forwards. In my process, it helped me to say "you know, I'm gonna give it 12 months. For 12 months I'm going to stop worrying about changes in my weight due to the illness & treatments; I'm going to cut myself some slack on everything I think I should be doing.. and on [this date] in 12 months time, I give myself permission to worry again". This is how I was able to mentally give myself the break I needed, and honestly, in those 12 months I worked on myself and my recovery... and I have never returned to where I was.
    I could talk for a long time on this topic, because there's so much to say on it... but I'll stop there. I'm happy if I've offered something helpful or encouraging to you. Sending you good energy xxx

  • @malgoooooo
    @malgoooooo 10 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Regarding "obsession question": I was in kind of similar situation. I was kind of obsessing over one of the people in my group in university. I knew it's not the kind of person I want to have in my life in any way. So I wanted to avoid him as much as I could. I guess some higher power didn't want to help me with that :) He was in my group in every subject I had. Even English - with was based on knowledge of the language so it was almost impossible for him to be in the same group, No luck for me there :) When I saw his in the same English group I didn't know if I should cry or laugh. In my university changing groups isn't an easy thing to do so I didn't want to go through all this trouble. I just always tried to stay as far away as I could (wasn't easy because world obviously hates me :) ). I think it's finally died down on it's own. Probably my constant battle with my mind to stop thinking about him and me trying to keep distance helped. But luck was not with me on this.

  • @adu1991
    @adu1991 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I feel this way about a certain celebrity, so thanks for clearing that up.

  • @EmmaCupcake
    @EmmaCupcake 10 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Sometimes I find I obsess over MH things, - ppls stories, SH,ED,anxiety. I worry that it fuels /triggers my problems,and maybe makes them worse?? Like there always on my mind sometimes? But then what I am doing is kinda mostly positive in that I'm researching some of my problems and learning about myself. Also I am taking in advice & working on my recovery. I think as long as what I'm watching/researching is positive it must do me good. Thanks for this video kati xx

    • @lucianarosa1208
      @lucianarosa1208 10 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I am so obsessed with mental health things too. I find myself reading and watching things like this every single day.

    • @slothmilly9012
      @slothmilly9012 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I am also super obsessed. Sometimes it seems like all I think about

    • @hannahpring830
      @hannahpring830 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I know this was years ago but it’s because mental health is sneaky and wants you to trigger it so it makes you want to watch things like it

  • @jennym9743
    @jennym9743 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    When people comment on my weight the comments change in my head. If someone says you lost weight my ED is all for it and makes me want to continue or I think they're lying trying to make me feel good. I'm too scared to ever say anything though.

  • @Airvian
    @Airvian 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    In regards to the 3rd question about physical help, I think one of the most important things that Kati didn’t say is get help for your physical health!! Although I was never diagnosed with any illness I was constantly tired for several years. It effected my work, school, depression got worse, I never felt like I had energy to do anything, everything felt like a chore. Maybe chronic fatigue syndrome is technically different but I definately know what it feels like to be constantly fatigued. In May last year I finally found a health program that’s helping me and I feel better than ever physically and mentally. It’s hard not to be depressed without dealing with what is making you depressed. If it’s your health instead of trying to cope with it, take care of it if possible. I had already seen several doctors and tried their suggestions and it didn’t work but this one did. It’s holistic health care, so you may have to try non traditional routes but this has been the best thing I’ve ever done and I wouldn’t be able to be a positive person like I am now without it even though I haven’t finished the program. I’m 9 months in and still a little left to go.

  • @alexathecute4023
    @alexathecute4023 8 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    i am obsessed over a guy so much..... Johnnie i wish you loved me......

    • @theantagonist7677
      @theantagonist7677 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Its tough. Basically the 30 year old virgin.
      Just be strong and mighty 💪 👊

    • @ButerWarrior44
      @ButerWarrior44 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hey what’s up baby, Johnnie here

    • @thebullwhisperer916
      @thebullwhisperer916 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sometimes I find it's a blessing in disguise when the separation happens....Yahuah Baruk you in abundance! Shalum & Ahavah

    • @dixienormous6969
      @dixienormous6969 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here.. I've been obsessed with him since 8th grade. Wtf is wrong with me. I don't even know him. I've talked to him multiple times but never in person lmao what?!?! I even talked to him on the phone, I loved hearing his voice and his laughter, it made me want him even more. I know this isn't actual love but... I'd imagine this is what it kind of feels like. I don't want to be like this anymore. I don't know what is wrong with me. I just want it to fucking stop.

  • @britaylor5586
    @britaylor5586 10 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Hi, I am struggling really bad, and everything is falling apart. I have not been on because I was somewhat scared to tell you, and others in the community. I feel like a failure I feel like I'm failing everyone. I'm losing everything, and I don't know what to do. Love and miss you. I'm sorry.

    • @slothmilly9012
      @slothmilly9012 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sending love and hugs* remember it's the depression talking, it's not true :) people do care. Whether you're sad, happy, anxious, or uplifted, people aren't going anywhere. We're here for you!

  • @thebullwhisperer916
    @thebullwhisperer916 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    "When you choose joy, you feel good, when you feel good you do good reminds others what joy feels like & it just might inspire them to do the same"

  • @maddalena5708
    @maddalena5708 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I have to say Katy, as much as i like you, i am not entirely satisfied with the "obsession answer". I would like you to dig in much deeper with the true meaning of an obsession. To me, before stopping feeding the obsession it would be more interesting to explore in depht the meaning of these obsession over people. I believe that obsessions can be very much related to early abandonment trauma, especially erotic ones. I mean in the end it is is toxic eventually you have to cut it off, but before doing so you battere explore the whole thing🤗.

  • @elevenbyfive
    @elevenbyfive 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    ***** Thank you so much, Kati. You got it exactly! I compare my recovery to others' and have all these expectations and then feel too ill to meet them and then beat myself up over THAT too! Your answer was exactly what i needed to hear. Thank yooooooooou!!💕💕

  • @PrettyPinkPeacock
    @PrettyPinkPeacock 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thank you for this video, I am going to try these anti-obsession tips in future and also now. sounds like good advice.

  • @fabianamazzara5375
    @fabianamazzara5375 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I am too obesed with Tom holland and spiderman and I literally cannot stop thinking about it. I need serious help especially since spiderman is a fictional character and I have an emotional attachment to him.

    • @divaboo2412
      @divaboo2412 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do you still think about him.

  • @VisionaryTribe
    @VisionaryTribe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Is it normal to meet an attractive person once and already be obsessing over them and planning a future together. Lol that’s been my dilemma and it brought me to these vids

  • @tompalmer5986
    @tompalmer5986 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    When I was little I developed the most intense crushes on girls. One time when I was eleven I went swimming, and I was surprised to realize that I hadn't thought about this girl for thirty minutes. It was a total obsession. I've talked to other guys who said they experienced the same thing. When I reached puberty that went away. That was also when my mental illness started to surface.

  • @karastenberg2518
    @karastenberg2518 10 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Kati, This will be my first Christmas without my Mom, who passed away earlier this year. Her birthday is also just a few days after Christmas. Do you have any tips for how to handle your first big days (holidays/birthdays) after a loved one has passed?

    • @jamesgeorge2230
      @jamesgeorge2230 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kara Stenberg i know this post was awhile back but i feel for u

    • @sramilatagore6445
      @sramilatagore6445 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      I'm investigating how to make a man fall in love with you and discovered a great website at Maras Magic Words (google it if you're interested)

    • @fabian8813
      @fabian8813 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      hey ,if anyone else trying to find out how to get get a guy to like you try Avyanna attract tactic (Have a quick look on google cant remember the place now ) ? Ive heard some interesting things about it and my mate got amazing results with it.

    • @PERFORTIS
      @PERFORTIS 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      I have spent months investigating how can u make a guy like you and found an awesome resource at Avyanna attract tactic (google it if you're interested)

    • @mohssinajaiz4906
      @mohssinajaiz4906 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      I've been studying how can u make a guy like you and discovered a great resource at Avyanna attract tactic (look it up on google)

  • @AzumaRikimaru
    @AzumaRikimaru 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    ive been in love with a women who lives in a different state for 5 years. Helped her through a rough relationship, and tried just being her friend. Eventually she got into a new relationship and started not answering my calls or texts. Soon i told her how i felt, and I knew nothing would come of it - and she told me she didnt feel the same. Although I knew this, hearing it broke my heart. I continued being her friend, but she never even reciprocated friendship.Never chcked up on me, never said happy birthday. However my feelings never went away, i started day dreaming about marrying this women. Every time I tried to get close, she pushed me away. Further down the road, she got back together with her toxic ex, by cheating on her boyfriend then made her boyfriend look bad by saying he wasnt good enough. That really opened my eyes, why did i ever trust this women in the first place. Now im going through no contact and it is hard, but I can breathe to ground myself because before that I couldn't even relax.

  • @koolaidk8595
    @koolaidk8595 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, Major Depression, PTSD, Anxiety, and ODD and I don't take any antipsychotics, only over the counter medicine for sleep or Trazadone. I don't think antipsychotics are the best route after researching but it can def stabilize people who are so far gone and need help to focus on getting better or just can't get better. I understand but please people do your research because for people like me antipsychotic and mood altering meds are the worst route to go. If it damages you in many other ways there is no point. Just remember all the bs the medical industry engages in ----> eating animals and consuming dairy ----> using fluoride in your oral hygeine products ----> not curing man-made diseases to keep ppl on medication that also harms you in the long run ----> RACKING UP BILLS TAKING UP SPACE IN A HOSPITAL BED. In my case, both mental hospitals and whatever you call hospitals where Emergency Rooms and ICU and shit is. Peace to all of you. Just sharing my take on drugs.

  • @DigitalMadrigal
    @DigitalMadrigal 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    What's amazing is how many people are comfortable dating someone who obsesses over them. Someone obsessing over me makes me uncomfortable. But some people really enjoy being obsessed over.

  • @etownshawn
    @etownshawn 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    too late im 8 years deep. burnout stage. brought me to the brink of suicide time & time again. but i appreciate this video, thx

  • @InshasChoice
    @InshasChoice 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I've only known him 3 days, beat that 😭

  • @maryelizabeth8058
    @maryelizabeth8058 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I live in an apartment house I'm on second floor a covert narcissist is on first floor... I wish I never met her but we are neighbors long story short she's giving me the silent treatment which is very painful cuz we share the same driveway .... I have become obsessed with her I don't like her I don't want to be friends with her she's spiteful manipulative I wish her the best to go find her life but we are so not compatible..... there's more to say but I obsess about her so I'm going no contact distancing myself realizing she has no power over me it's hard because I suffer with OCD thanks I love your videos prayers and love💞

  • @MartRam16
    @MartRam16 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Love the last quote! 💜

  • @TheBr00talhamster
    @TheBr00talhamster 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What if my favourite movies and movies I wanna see has that celebrity I'm obsessed with? She's beautiful and seems so perfect and talented and gifted and my favourite actress. She's 23 and already one of the most amazing people I've ever seen and I'm 25 alone unemployed and useless. She makes me feel so sad that I'll never be around her. I love her movies so much. Will I ever be able to have a healthy way of liking her and finding her attractive from afar or do I have to stop following her entirely?

  • @indridcold8433
    @indridcold8433 ปีที่แล้ว

    This may sound strange to most. However, I have never obsessed about anybody in my life. I do not form long, deep, bonds, with humans. I just do not like the way most of them treat me. Thus, when I am forced to meet a human, I am on my highest guard and disallow any familiarity to be formed.

  • @spota4589
    @spota4589 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    That step brothers scene where will ferrel comes on to his therapist describes this perfectly

  • @MyRainn
    @MyRainn 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you, I needed this video right now

  • @level5productions
    @level5productions 10 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hi Kati, I am not sure if you will see this, but I am wondering if you could cover a bit more on intrusive thoughts and possibly into OCD more. I have Pure O OCD which is when I am obsessing over an intrusive thought that spirals out of control and gets me quite a lot of anxiety, the worst part is, it is a sexual obsession in OCD which makes it all the more disturbing. I think it would be awesome to cover that stuff, I am working on my recovery and it is getting better and I feel less anxious around triggers but I still heavily struggle with overwhelming guilt over the thoughts that can literally cripple me for an entire day and causes me to do no work (also, would some DBT skills help with this overwhelming emotion because you said they can help with overwhelming emotions?)

  • @alanl.4252
    @alanl.4252 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I've been obsessing over someone I've met back in high school for some time now, my obsession died down after I graduated but I've noticed a rekindling in this obsession of mine recently after I've noticed this person consistently liking my stuff on social media since I'm friends with the person on Facebook.
    I've never really had the chance to know the guy back when we were in school, only ever exchanged a few words, a few hellos and small talk here and there, but for some reason just like that I can't get him off my mind. I've always wanted to be friends with this person even though we never really had a full on introduction or conversation.
    From what my friends that knew him have told me I hear that he's all around a nice guy and it shows.
    I guess I'm just wondering whether I should trying reaching out to this person even though it's been a couple of years since I've last seen him, or whether I should kill this reemerging obsession by unfriending him from social media?
    Sorry if it's long I guess I just don't know how I should deal with this. I guess I just wanted to get some stuff off my chest.

  • @britaylor5586
    @britaylor5586 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    BTW, I

  • @gabbiefulton8604
    @gabbiefulton8604 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you Kati for this video it has help me understand why someone has become obsessed with me. Why I felt a little obsessed with my ex after our breakup.

  • @larrychu6396
    @larrychu6396 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Whoa it's like everyone video covers my crazy 😜 feelings 😛

  • @raodenraoden9796
    @raodenraoden9796 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    The answer to the question starts at 3:11

  • @sadiemccarley
    @sadiemccarley 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I know you probably won't or can't share this.. But you are doing so well, and have had past struggles, are you on any medications that maintain you? I am not asking to know what you are on or be invasive, but I have been on meds for so many years and wonder if getting to a really functional place means usually being off medication? Are therapists and psychiatrists on meds themselves? You can put this in a video.

  • @emileejohnson3868
    @emileejohnson3868 10 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hey! my name is Emilee and I have watched lots of videos on signs and symptoms of depression.I have also heard a lot of people say it may just be hormones, i'm having a really hard time figuring it out. I go 24-48 hours without eating because I just don't have an appetite,I don't like leaving my house to see Friends or family. And not sleeping great and very easily agitated. Maybe I'm being a bit dramatic, or overthinking this but I would appreciate some guidance and advice. Thank you! By the way I love you and your videos! 💜

  • @HADASDAS2
    @HADASDAS2 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you 🙏
    What if I’m not good with ignoring.. 😬...
    Not going dancing 💃 makes me feel good
    But my parents ask if I danced
    Cause I need exercise I did gained weight ... I got slime .. but love candy 🍭 lol and eat food fruit 🍎...
    thank you 🙏 for saying that I can not go to those places - I’m doing that ... it’s on my free time.. and I pay money ...
    I did the wrong thing ...

  • @rylwin8585
    @rylwin8585 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    here's several suggestions for how to get any guy you want
    don't be impatient
    Use less words and choose them with care
    Communicate via behaviour as well as words
    (I read about these and more from Maras Magic Words website )

  • @craiglange4550
    @craiglange4550 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great video Kati, you have a range informative helpful videos that people can relate to. Keep them coming and ignore any negative comments if you he any. You inspire many people :-)

  • @mood-qe8mg
    @mood-qe8mg 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My grandma came a few days ago, she rarely visits so, but I cant help but feel bad not saying goodbye after she last came and not spending time with her when I had the chance, now I cant help but think about bad I didnt say bye and spend that quality time with her, I told this to my siblings about how I was feeling but they just say get over it and move on but I cant help but feel bad and thinking that my grandma may think that I dont like her or something and i am trying to move on but ever once in a while i cant help but feel teary and bad about the last visit, so right now I'm trying to get over it as best I could, but it's just hard since covid coming and anything could happen, I see my grandmother as a second mom and just ignoring from the last visit just didnt feel right and she rarely comes so now I cant help but feel bad and regret over my shoulders, what should I do about this?

  • @nonno318
    @nonno318 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    What if you have an obsession with your best friend that rejected your love in an intentionally crude way and left you with unanswered questions, expected you to be fine in the friend zone because you’re gay (and gay feelings can’t be as legit right?..) and you don’t want to leave them because you love them both romantically and as a really close friend. And you can’t leave them because they need you through a crisis. Am I doing the wrong thing to keep feeding the obsession, thinking I’m helping them and saving an important friendship?

  • @Neil-y3l
    @Neil-y3l 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks Kati.

  • @melissatenhove6222
    @melissatenhove6222 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    What if your obsession is with someone who your trying to start a relationship with ... You don't want want to scare them away and don't want to have them take up all your time thinking of them.

  • @Taffer9876
    @Taffer9876 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I know this is public, but that is OK. I was trying to become friends with a girl at work (just friends) and I told her I thought she was nice and I liked her along with her pretty smile. This was over 2 years ago. She has not spoken to me since and avoids me at all costs. I had two other friends at work and now they are her friends and now they do not want me around etc.
    Yes, more to the story. The girl I was trying to be friends with is openly judgmental. I went through an extremely traumatic phase where I lost a good job of 9 years because my neck is too fat. So 23$ and hour went away, my apartment, all my belongings etc. Now I barely make more than minimum wage. So I showed her a video I made of myself playing the first solo of Comfortably numb on my Gibson Les Paul (which I also lost) and I said this is how I was before this terrible phase happened. She immediately told me I am negative. I do complain too much, but I did tell her right off the bat I suffer from depression and it is hard to snap out of it sometimes, especially early in the morning, which is when I showed her the video.
    That video was my proudest moment of my life. I never thought in a million years I could do that. So now I am out of 3 "friends" and have none left. I can joke about my problems or issues and they think that is negative. I think it is positive if you can joke about it. I do not know if you will read this or not, but this is killing me to the point I cannot sleep. Thank you for your time if you do read any of this.

  • @flybirdsmith5406
    @flybirdsmith5406 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Yes, but what you do when you’re obsessed with your therapist for instance? When you talk about with her, but still the feelings of love insisting? Do you stop therapy to get that distance you need to get over it?

    • @cookies-mh9th
      @cookies-mh9th 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      How r u now ? Are you still in love with your therapist ? 🙃

  • @lorisiccia5914
    @lorisiccia5914 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I moved on from someone who i thought we were closer than i thought...we used to message eachother everyday. I was in a tough time ans suddenly being ignored just made me wonder what i did wrong.
    I ended up moving for school and to be closer to family
    And started to move on... and keep busy doing my thing with school.
    Then saw tgis person in traffic so i messaged..no answer.. so i went back to just finally moving fwd.
    Then i get a dream of meeting them for a bike ride...ans it was nice to see you.. and seemed so real... but I need this to stop.
    I want to move fwd...but part of me still wonders what happened and what i did wrong... to have someone just drop our of your life.. like they died or something.. but really it seems im dead to him.
    And makes it harder to be able to move fwd....or to trust anyone new i might meet.
    Honestly its less stress being solo but how do i get the dreams to stop. So i can stop re thinking of him for days n weeks afterwhen a dream happens.

  • @gabbiefulton8604
    @gabbiefulton8604 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey Kati please do more video on this topic

  • @neganOG
    @neganOG 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    when i think i'm finally getting over this girl i dream of her and the obsession comes back. i don't know what else to do

  • @Lisbett-m3
    @Lisbett-m3 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great advice

  • @LISUBEE1
    @LISUBEE1 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Plus honestly yes, it is a choice to think happy thoughts. I know because I've been there. But what if ou just can't seem to decide on being positive anymore? It's hurting how you say it's a choice as I don't feel like it is one at the moment.

  • @-_-iamaunicorn-_-2455
    @-_-iamaunicorn-_-2455 9 ปีที่แล้ว

    My friend my whole life (I'm 13) started bullying me 1 year ago then new kids moved in and they all ganged up on me the first kid threatened me a few time and punched me once. The new kids are knocking on my windows at 8:00 at night and I have a chronic illness that causes depression and depression runs in my family. It just sucks what do I do? I have chemo every month threapys every day cbt , pt , it and water therapy. What do I do? Please help.

  • @thegamingrelish9272
    @thegamingrelish9272 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have intrusive thoughts about my ex/bestfriend nearly all day everyday. either its a memory, her voice, or thinking about her coming round the corner for example or just anything really. I don't pay attention to the thoughts as I know it can just make them worse and more frequent. I see a therapist and I meditate everyday once in the morning and once at night. I've also been on antidepressants for a month now for my anxiety/depression. I don't do any compulsions to make these thoughts appear or dissappear i just let the thoughts be. Any idea what this is. Is it related to my anxiety or depression

  • @notsurewhatishappening3611
    @notsurewhatishappening3611 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey! I really find your videos helpful. Thank you for making them. I'm new here and I don't quite get those journal topics. What's up with that?

  • @louvillarino
    @louvillarino 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I know it’s creepy but how do I stop myself from stalking people? Not to the extent that I go to their place and look over their window. When I meet people or get to know them, I tend to look them up online - social media and search engine pages. I get to know their backgrounds, in which city they lived in, where did they go last weekend, what type of person is s/he when with friends. Until I became attached to this person. I want to get over this but I can’t. The curiosity and chismosa in me is making me want to do it. Also, you mentioned that I need to like stay away from the person for me not to feed the obsession but I came to a point that I even stalked my previous doctor and my current doctor. Worst is I stalked my current doctor prior having her as my current doctor. (A little background: I’m having check up in a general hospital in the Philippines wherein the assigned doctors for the patients are changed when their residency is over.)

  • @Demitrival
    @Demitrival 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have a Jake Gyllenhaal obsession that recently started up again. But this time I literally watch some many movies and interviews that he is in. I guess I wanna know why I’m obsessed?

  • @GordonGarvey
    @GordonGarvey 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Inference, the person you obsess over probably fulfils an ideal image on an archetype deeprooted in your psyche. That's what I think about an ex of mine. Although I haven't yet, I'd say see a shrink to figure out what's going on in your head. This "don't think about them", "distract yourself" stuff doesn't work for me. It's like telling someone who depressed to just "cheer up!". That's just not how this stuff works.

  • @coffeecoffee8
    @coffeecoffee8 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    love that artwork behind you, very cool, what is it made from?

  • @kayleederose9492
    @kayleederose9492 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was so helpful. Thank you so much 😭😭

  • @leahnosnhoj2203
    @leahnosnhoj2203 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Heh. I have an aunt Rhonda.

  • @theantagonist7677
    @theantagonist7677 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I latch onto ppl. Have to distance myself always cuz im too intense

  • @xBagheera
    @xBagheera 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    With 2 I just try but I just can't

  • @chandnichangal6375
    @chandnichangal6375 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have obsassation toward my teacher,you are saying be far away from your obsassation ,tell me how could possible i meet him daily

  • @jennym9743
    @jennym9743 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Kati my mom and family put food on my plate for me maybe because they don't trust me but it really stresses me out. What can I say to my family so I can get my own food?

  • @Spritual-life-lessons
    @Spritual-life-lessons 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hi Kati, as you said that people usually stop asking questions usually when they get their answers. It didn't happen to me although the technique I use is when someone asks or say something that I dislike or feel confused, I do not say anything at all. Do u think it's ok ?

  • @nikkigardner5069
    @nikkigardner5069 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hi Kati I'm from the uk we don't have thanksgiving here but I scared for Christmas I don't want to eat anything at the minute I think I might be anorexic so I'm worried about Christmas because all my family will be there and will ask what's Wrong
    HELP?

  • @alexwolfslaughter9699
    @alexwolfslaughter9699 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    so I found out that my friend was using ANSI was pushing me baby obsessed with my ex

  • @cyantile5490
    @cyantile5490 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    But what if we want to stop obsessing about the person but want to eventually come back to them without thinking obsessively

    • @cyantile5490
      @cyantile5490 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cuz they're close friends

  • @spota4589
    @spota4589 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I need this

  • @sagey2.015
    @sagey2.015 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    The person who submitted question 2 is exactly like me

  • @gjop-xm2xe
    @gjop-xm2xe 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Interesting peace behind you

  • @thebullwhisperer916
    @thebullwhisperer916 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks! No Christmas no Starbucks for me. No meds! REPENTENCE Fasting breaking soul ties praying seeking Yahusha! Yahuah Baruk you in abundance! Shalum & Ahavah

  • @camilat8268
    @camilat8268 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Damn I wish I would have found your channel a few days ago when I was just in a bad place but nevertheless I'm so happy I found you!!!

  • @caitlinharris6871
    @caitlinharris6871 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    What happens if it's a teacher?

  • @robbylake3784
    @robbylake3784 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love hobbies...

  • @Lynn99757
    @Lynn99757 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    im obsesse with a guy for 7 yrs,,idk how to stop it

  • @shell877
    @shell877 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey I know this is a old video but I'm wondering if obsessing over things,bands, hobbies or people etc is a sign of any mental illness? Like having phases of only being interested in one thing for a few months is this normal?

    • @fluu619
      @fluu619 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I guess it could be about getting attached? Maybe there is some kind of relationship you want/need and fill the lack of it with something else that gives you pleasure

  • @TimothyGrabowski
    @TimothyGrabowski 10 ปีที่แล้ว

    Subsribed to your channel. Great stuff. You are very good on camera. One shot, no jump cuts, and you satay on topic. I'm Struggling with psych meds. I have to take them or to the hospital. Been meeting people who actually recover without meds. Just did a video on yes or no to psych meds.Drugs or Medications Your Choice / MI2MH Started doing weekly webinars you would be a great guest. Keep on Keeping on.

  • @raquelalmeida8536
    @raquelalmeida8536 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    i was reading the second question and i got surprised shfjf i thought: waaait...did i send a question? 🤔🤔🤔 but then i saw the date and realised i didnt 😂

  • @AJanae.
    @AJanae. 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Why do we even get obsessed

  • @alannahhan2045
    @alannahhan2045 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have an obsession with richie and eddie from IT xD

  • @jamesgeorge2230
    @jamesgeorge2230 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    i wish i could loose weight so bad.