I laughed so had at the "known homosexual" bit, especially when he told his father that he was actually a known homosexual. I always find the phrases used by homophobes to describedf us quite funny, like when they say homosexuality is a "moral genocide" or an "organic disorder"...like wtf what is an "organic disorder"??? lol
Adam Leo Not sure what an organic disorder is. Veganism, maybe? Lol. Him: Hey what are you doing? Me: Destroying the nuclear family, what are you doing?
Panala Please tell me that’s sarcasm. First of all, you don’t get to decide who goes to Hell. Unless Jesus is paying you to keep the Judgment Seat warm till He gets back. And I very much doubt that’s the case. It’s your job to love your neighbours and let God sort it out. It is not your job to threaten people with God’s wrath. Look to your own sins and not the sins of others. Mother Julian of Norwich told us that doing that puts a veil before your eyes and obscures your view of God, and she was right. Work out your own salvation and let others do the same. Second, don’t presume that because someone is gay, they don’t know God. I have plenty of evidence in my life that God loves me, gay or not. So much so that the rantings of a Bible thumper who is far from the Gospel while being able to quote it chapter and verse won’t shake my faith. The most that’s going to do is encourage me to pray harder for them. Third, and most importantly, remember that St. Paul says the best thing to be is celibate, and if you can’t be celibate, then marry. So, tell you what, why don’t you try to control your heterosexual urges and live the pure celibate life that St. Paul says is best, and leave the rest of us to deal with our urges? After all, it’s not like Jesus worshipped the family the way Evangelicals do. He called several men away from their wives and families to follow Him. I can’t help but think that if people like you had been alive back then, you’d be calling Jesus a socialist and a home wrecker. Lol
I always knew my son was gay so I tried to educate myself as much as possible about it. I would always let him know I loved him unconditionally. When he came out at the age of 16 yrs old I was forever trying to " fix" him up with cute boys. We still laugh about it today. I eventually did get to dance at his wedding 7 years ago. He is happy so I am happy I love my son in law. No mother can ask for more for her children except grandkids still waiting. Lol
Marvelous Superhero WOW ! That's your response to a young kid who is gay shame on you. What are you doing on this page ???? What makes you an expert on gay sex ??????
Darren Cooper Darren it is hard I know but maybe you just need to give your parents time. In the meantime find someone you can talk to it really does get better. I don't know how old you are or if you stay at home. Just remember you are a beautiful person and perfect just the way God made you. There is nothing wrong with being gay don't let other people's negativity bring you down. Your mantra should be everyday " I am Darren and I am Awesome , Period !!!!!! Please don't listen to fear mongers on gay sex , educate yourself. Gay or straight sex have the same risk factors, some straight couples engage in anal sex but there is more to gay sex than anal. I am a Nursing Sister and the mother of a gay son so please don't listen to so called experts on social media. Be safe sending you hugs and lots of kissesxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
*goes up to parents of a random guy from the neighborhood* "Excuse me Mam. I would like you to know that your son has been seen with KNOWN HOMOPHOBES. You may want to take care of that before they turn him into a KNOWN HOMOPHOBE as well. Have a nice day!"
I think this mother in my neighborhood may say that to my mom, she probably would say, “excuse me ma’am, I would like you to know that your daughter has been seen with known homosexuals. And until she stops hanging out with them she can not hang out with my daughter.” I srsly think my friends mom would say that to my mom about me.
I’m a. 63yr old gay man with a much older Gay brother named Pat. When Pat was about 18 or 19 Dad confronted him saying that he’d found out that Pat had been seen around town with known homosexuals and threatened to throw him out. Pat simply smiled and called Dad on the fact that he knew for a fact that Dad had a cute little Latino boyfriend he kept on the side! Needless to say dad was furious, Pat got tossed out and all hell broke loose. I was 5yrs old at the time and missed out on all the drama. 15yrs later I came out as gay, Mom lost it, but Dad just shrugged and chuckled and just kept eating his breakfast LOL! I had no idea about Dads bisexual antics until years and years later, long after he had passed. Pat was 72 at the time and casually told me this story over drinks...what a family.
You know what they say, the family that prays together stays together. It's sad that so many parents treat their gay kids like this, even going to the extreme measure of throwing them out, especially when a parent has his own skeletons rattling in his own closet. To be honest, when parents are this toxic, and full of fire brimstone and BS, it's usually better for the gay or lesbian kid when he or she minimizes or even eliminates contact with his or her messed up toxic parents. I know it hurts like hell for a kid to go through this, and I know a few people who were thrown out of their house after they came out to their parents, but if a young adult can work thru these issues and move on with his life in a healthy manner, he or she will be much better off.
Short story long. I had been nervous to tell my parents I am gay for years, but when I met my first somewhat serious boyfriend, I finally did. My dad would rather avoid the subject, so my mom had "no-one" to support her with her dilemma.... She called her sister the next day (did I tell you I had dealt with it on my own for years?) It was decided (not by me) that all their siblings would be privy to "her" secret if the subject ever came up in conversation, but that their mother, my grandmother, would be spared the burden. I moved abroad to live with my boyfriend the year after. My parents have been very supportive and my mom has made the long journey to visit me and my boyfriend several times. I went back about once a year, sometimes with my boyfriend, sometimes alone. One of these times I happened to be back in my parents home on my birthday, and my grandmother called my mother to say her "happy birthday to your son". I picked up the phone, to my grandmother's happy surprise. We talked a little and she finally asked how long I was staying and when I was going back. I answered only 10 days and leaving day after tomorrow. To which she replied... "Yeah you can't leave your boyfriend alone too long, if you love him" Nobody had "officially" told her. She had understood her children's innuendoes and as we later learned she had proudly told some of her friends that she had a gay grandchild. She must have been well in her 80's at the time. So proud of her.
"You may want to take care of that before they turn him into one." That just blows my mind. You cannot turn a person into being a homosexual. Either you are one or you're not.
@Suicidal Vet Your comment is stupid. NOBODY is ever turned gay. Even if they are molested. Homosexuality is an immutable trait. Either you are born with it or you're not.
@Suicidal Vet Again, your comment is stupid. Nobody is ever turned gay. There are no reputable studies that show this. Only ignorant people and religious fanatics believe that nonsense.
@Suicidal Vet Your kind leave abusive, rude, and inconsiderate comments about and to gays and lesbians all the time. My comments were factual,not abusive, rude, and inconsiderate. If you took them that way that's your problem.
I came out to my parents when I was 21. They suggested electric shock therapy, but I said, no I'm good thanks. They seemed to accept it but my dad masked his opinion for most of his life. He was very controlling and occasionally abusive towards my mum. Towards the end of her life she became ill and as the elder son, it fell to me to help arrange her care as he wasn't being a responsible adult at that point, and that was something that he resented even though I tried to keep my interference to an absolute minimum. He was very difficult and abusive with both me and my brother and we wouldn't accept that so we distanced ourselves from him. When he died, he disinherited both me and my brother, and he wrote a four page letter to his executor where he told him how to 'manage' me if I contested the will. His real opinion came out in that letter, four pages of hate. I had a fundamental weakness of character because I was gay, could never stick at anything, had no morals or ethics. This was not an image any of my friends would recognise. He also suggested to the executor that if I contested the will, they should speak to my long term partner because he would 'see sense'. I saw the letter the week before he died. I had gone to the house to pick up some things to to take to his care home, and as happens in the UK, they had reached the point where they decide whether the State or the Estate should pay for his care. I had power of attorney, so I had to look through his stuff to try to find out how to administer his affairs. When I read the letter, I thought, 'you accept this, you really are a doormat'. Everything else is 'dutiful son', this is 'doormat'. I took his stuff up to the care home and dropped it off, and explained to the nurse that I wasn't coming back and I said why. He died about 3 months later. I knew he had died as soon as I woke up in the morning and so did my brother. We both just felt this overwhelming sense of relief. I arranged his funeral, I wrote and delivered his eulogy, and none of his friends would have realised what he'd done. I knew they'd been told things about me but I didn't think it was fair to taint their memory of him and I wanted them to maybe at least question what they'd been told. I still remember looking down that church and seeing angry faces glowering at me but most of them softened by the end of the service. My brother and I decided to just walk away, a surprisingly easy decision to make. In the longer term, what he did was kill his own legacy. We didn't go back and take anything from our childhood home, because he'd made it clear he didn't want us to have it, and nobody else wants that stuff, so his life ended up in a skip. We are both doing fine. He wasn't much of a dad growing up, but it does make it easier to move on if there is nothing there to miss.
Wow! Why do you think he wouldn't leave anything to you or your brother? You two didn't ask to be born. Part of being a parent is leaving your inheritance behind. Sounds very selfish!!
I think he was mad as hell that he couldn't control us any more. We were prepared for that. I don't think we were expecting the 'skip' effect, the feeling that your childhood is a dead zone and it doesn't belong to you any more. Far worse things have happened to other people on this thread, we survived, and knowing that you can walk away from something like that does give you a peculiar sort of resilience.
Mine wasn't as bad as yours. But still, there was little to miss. When he died I'd just gotten medical clearance (after open heart surgery) to go back to work on the condition that work I only two hours with a one hour break for a nap in between. My mother and sister were incensed that I couldn't make the six hour drive and to this day they refuse to speak to me. I later found out that they told people I had an 'infection' instead of the truth. Why? Good question.
Thank you for this. It is lovely. I cried when you spoke of your father telling you he was proud of you in seeing how you lived your life in light of the challenges you faced. I had a similar conversation with my father on a family pilgrimage to Bosnia in 1993. Several years later he presented me with a picture of the Blessed Mother and said it was in memory of "when we met." I was initially confused but then it dawned on me how important that moment had been to him. He died a year ago at 97 and I miss his unconditional love but I feel his presence with me. Thanks for reminding me of this most precious blessing. Your parents sound wonderful.
You're lucky, my father got a phone call from a high school counselor I had confided in. He beat me unconscious and when I woke up, some of my clothes were stuffed in a garbage bag. My father told me to get out and don't come back. I was 17.
I'm so sorry Mike. All I can say, as twisted as it sounds, is that your father did you a favor. No child should have a parent whose love is conditional. You were better off without such a negative influence in your life. Sending (unconditional) love to you.
The best thing to do is wait until you have graduated high school and are out on your own if you have to “come out” to your parents. Then you’re on equal footing. If they turn out to be unsupportive then just move to a distant metropolitan area and cut contact. You’ll make ‘your own’ family. It’ll be THEIR loss....not yours.
William... easier said than done. Keep in mind, anyone who moves away from home under that kind of pressure will feel like an exile -- uprooted, bereft, dispossessed. Yet you are right, and that is the worst part. I gave you a thumbs up with regret.
@Flenif2247 With the death of rent control everywhere is too expensive. I've known people who rented out a closet. True. I have a friend who has rent subsidy. He's been in the same apt for almost 50 years. His rent is $1500 a month. The same non-subsidized apts in his building are $15,000 a month. Manhattan is no longer affordable for working people. But there are the boroughs.
Video is beautiful. I just cant get over the fact that people think you can ‘turn’ someine homosexual. Like bish!? We are not zombies or vampires. We are just the most fabulous people you’ll meet
@@pinkpanther7442 So are you an atheist homophobe? Hmm that's quite interesting actually So instead of religion, your hatred of gays stems from... what? Saying we all have low IQ's is a gross misrepresentation of all of the gay academics, scholars, and inventors throughout history. Alan Turing and Nicola Tesla are great examples. What is it that truly makes you hate us?
On a somewhat related note, can someone tell me why people think religion somehow makes anyone " immune " from being gay or straight? I mean, you hear about gay people who said they prayed for the longest time to be made straight, but yet you never hear about straight people praying to....remain(?) straight. Unlike the guy in this video, my parents barely said anything to me about sex and I have never asked my siblings if it was the same for them. What my father told me about sex would fit on a postage stamp. Yet, my mother, when she hear the Navy was transferring me to San Francisco, was the one who told me it was a gay Mecca....I had no idea what she was talking about (it was the late 70s).
My Beloved Mother, still going strong at 85 years young, needed to know directly from me why my marriage ended abruptly, after being outed by someone who saw me in a gay bathhouse, and told my ex wife’s close friend. Adding to a Lifetime of her iconic and comical responses, was this: “Steven, I love you no matter what, but after 5 children that’s a fine how do you do,”
This story is beyond incredible! His parents are such strong people to actually use their brains when I'm sure everyone around them were of a differing opinion. I love the Catholic therapist had the strength to not follow the church's views and instead follow his training. I'm sure this therapist helped the parents come to terms with what they already knew, that it was ok to love and support their son.
What a blessing this guy had in his loving parents. It’s ok for parents or people in general not to understand being gay if they are not gay themselves.. but to not understand something and still love and accept a person and to have dialogue and compassion is everything we all want. Wonderful video.
I love your Dads later reaction.. almost word for word what my Dad's was. At first he had a rough time with having a gay son and he actually blatantly favored my brothers ,it I got strung out on meth and he begged me to come home and get clean and work with.hom and I did and after a bout a year we were driving home from work and he told me how proud he was of me. He said "Of all my boys...". He had really supported me those months and he helped me get clean.
What percentage of people have a positive experience of coming out? It’s such a hard and scary thing, especially at that time. It’s nice to hear stories of such loving parents.
I’m bisexual and I never told any of my friends or family, I’ve never came out. I just rocked up one day with a guy then another day with a girl and I never bothered to explain myself. I kept thinking all my friends and family would say something but they could care less and we never talk about it lol I’m happy so that’s enough for them.
A woman in my acting class told be all homosexuals were molested. I was 17 and I knew it was complete BULLSHIT, but I basically said NOTHING because I hated conflict. I hope I get to tell her how wrong she is and slap her across the face one day.
The first person I come out that I was gay. That’s my sister . I cried and said that “I’m not straight I’m gay” The answer I got from my sister is👇 #I don’t care what you are straight , Circle, triangle or square .I love you because you are my brother” WTF..Her answer made me speechless !! 😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳 Her answer made my tears stop flowing. And made me had hard laughed😂😂😂 It may not be the best answer .But I love it.
It´s still mortal sin. Is that more important than the salvation of your soul? It´s not because it´s socially acceptive that is o.k. God´s laws are eternal.
@Suicidal Vet funny I was never pressured into being gay in fact I was terrified when I found out I like guys in junior high being gay is not a choice there's scientific research to prove it please educate yourself.
@Suicidal Vet You're not being considerate and opened minded by spreading the lie that people are turned gay by being molested. These types of lies hurt not only gays who are struggling with their sexuality but heterosexual people who were molested as children. There is no reputable evidence that shows that anyone can be turned gay by any means
Suicidal Vet outstanding claims require outstanding evidence other than ones personal experiences since there is no way of knowing whether that person is telling the truth or not.
I remember when my told me he was gay, we my daughter and myself were grateful he told us i couldn't be more proud of my son and daughter two wonderful children and now 3 wonderful grandchildren
For those who are having a hard time, times are changing bit by bit. I live in an quite socially liberal city but when I was a kid, "gay" was considered a massive insult. Now, almost nobody gives a damn.
So glad that he spoke about his Dad's words to him all those years later. If I could give advice to my younger self it would be that not all parents can adjust immediately. It took years for ME to process the fact that I was gay and parents can't be expected to do so overnight. I lost several years with my Dad by not realizing that - don't let it happen to you
All that matters to me is that my son is happy! What I hate about myself is not knowing whether if I wasn't gay, whether I'd be so accepting. What if I was homophobic? ☹️
Makes me so happy to hear a good story about loving parents. My parents accepted me as well and it makes me so angry when I meet other gay people and find out their parents kicked them out for being gay. No one deserves that kind of pain.
At my nephew's wedding rehearsal dinner, one of his friend's who I have known since they were in 8th grade, came up to me and came out. He introduced me to his partner. They were both very nervous. I was struck dumb and didnt know what to say....because I already knew he was gay. I knew it from the first time I met him. I didnt want to say oh honey I already knew that. It seemed wrong. So after a long pause, I just hugged him and said what possible difference could that make to me and how I've felt about you all these years?. I embraced his partner and told them I hope they were happy, and if all went well, I would be honored to be invited to their wedding someday. (Same gender marriage was not legal at that time which I always thought was stupid). I couldn't care less if my son were gay. I love him unconditionally. And forever.
What's sad is that there needs to be a "coming out" at all. I know people, mostly men, who were always gay and everyone knew it. There were no big secrets to hide and so no need to reveal them. I would like to live in a time when "homosexual" is not a big thing.
What a nice guy, and what wonderful parents. Honestly, I was waiting for that BUT moment when his father found out , and it was never spoken. His parents may be proud of him, but I'm proud of both the parents and him.
NEVER try to force your kid to come out!!! My dad did the usual "I love you no matter what" and the "whatever said man to man stays between us"... My dad knew I was gay and kept trying to force me to admit to it. I never did, and sadly never got the chance to tell him. This part hurts, as no matter how many times he said the "man to man blah blah" speech, the few times in my 18 year old life at the time, I did tell him (some not so important) a few things he had to keep quiet about, he failed... So and again it hurts to admit, I couldn't trust that he would keep it to himself. Looking back, I would have came out to him, but at the same time I wasn't ready for anyone else to know... that and he would have kept me away from my bf (20+ years later that bf is still in the closet and why we broke up)... that I definitely know he would have kept us apart.... The sad part is that he passed away just before I graduated HS... He was 41.... The scary part, i just hit 40 not to long ago...
I wish so much I could have been able to go to my parents and tell them that I was in love with another guy and after telling them, hear them say "it's okay, we love you regardless and we hope that you are happy" but the complete opposite happened. Ever since I have been forced to live a straight life. The world still has so much to learn about love and tolerance. I have missed decades of been with someone I love because I had to keep the family happy and unashamed of me.
I remember being kind of blackmailed into seeing a gender specialist by a disgruntled partner but it was the best thing as the professional was really professional and encouraged me to be who I wanted to be make friends or partner with who I felt like and accept the fact I knew I wasn't male but never felt feminine and as a result I have had a pretty happy gender fluid life. His message back in the early 1980s was gender is a spectrum and you don't actually choose where you fit on it. you recognise where you are and you will be happier if you accept that and live your life accordingly rather than playacting
I came out at eight.. sitting in the back seat of the car, I just randomly said “mom, dad, I think I might be bi”. They were cool with it and I later learned that they’d talked about the possibility when I was a baby: that was a bit disturbing to be told. Now I’m partners with the best person ever and I’ve finally found friends. I’m only 18, so there’s still a lot ahead.
Hows that disturbing? It's nice to know that they were talking about it that early. Always having the possibility your child might be gay is good because it shows that they will love you no matter what
It is so weird that some parents think they are being generous when they say things like “oh we love you no matter what”. But actually their job is to love their children unconditionally right?
Ignorance is so destructive. After at least 12 years of “education” yet so many people are ignorant to the bone about homosexuality. How can this be? Being gay is not a choice any more than I have a choice about my skin or hair color or my height. Ignorance and hate are everywhere.
I'm about the same age and I had a remarkably very similar scenario with my folks. Very religious. Very accepting. Almost no questions. They accepted my partners and were very close to us. I didn't have a partner with HIV . . but several very close friends - - they were very loving and caring toward them. I had a partner at one point who's parents were not religious and were more liberally accepting and he held it against my folks for being as conservative as they were.(needless to say - that was instrumental in ending that relationship). Sadly - though - there were times that I felt the church was more important than family . . but . . I understood why. Thank god times have changed and much progress has been made. I kinda do feel like part of a pioneering generation for the LBGTQ movement.
What awesome, supportive, absolutely fantastic parents you had. I am sure you know how lucky you were in this life to have them. The horror stories out there.
As a person my opinion about gays never was negative. Now as a mother at the first moment my daughter said to me she’s gay YES is a lot of things I don’t understand about be a gay or have a children gay is a lot to know to learn but never ever give my back to my beutiful and lovely daughter. If someone needs you support if is in the closet be a support. We need to support each other’s.💖🙏🌸
I like this channel. I'm very much heterosexual, I don't have any openly gay friends/relatives. But like everyone, I'm aware of the inequality and IMO strange beliefs of people with regard to homosexuality and LGBTQ in general. You hear so much 'controversy' and views of extremes, but rarely the quiet everyday people just living their life. This channel has so many video's of just kind decent human beings not trying to make a big fuss about who they are, just want to live their life happily like everyone else. It's refreshing to see, to be emphasised we're all the same, regardless of sexuality. Why is it even an issue?
@Suicidal VetI generally disregard them as i hear/see them, so they don't spring to mind. Umm... 'it's a sickness', 'ungodly', 'responsable for AIDS existing', 'can be passed as a contagion by association', 'is not natural', so many random weird things. All of which are completely factless and rediculous.
@Suicidal Vet No less natural than the many sexually transmitted diseases out there, man made objects for self pleasure, infections and diseases of the urinary tracts, surgical operations to stop pregnancy, drugs and special diets to increase pleasure, ability, or prohibit pregnancies etc. All as a consequence of reason to engage in an intimate act... You highlight the rare and worst cases as a reason. You can do that for literally everything/anything man kind does. If you are that concerned with problems arrising from intercorse, you should support doing away with the act all together. reproduction does not require intercourse. that leaves on pleasure, and if that isn't a reason enough, then simply don't partake of intimate relations at all, no risk of bad things happening then.
My mother is really accepting of my life and she has really accepted my partner and really gets on well with him it is a very different story with my father who hasn't spoken to me for 33 years it is his choice he is still my father and i have the utmost respect for my dad but whatever I try to do he still won't talk to me I get on with my life and just hope one day he will talk to me
If everyone would learn to take care of their own business and problems their hands would be too full and would not have the time to worry about what someone else is doing
I´m happy my parents were completely cool with me being homosexual. My stepfather just said with so much sarcasm in this voice: Oh, really. Never noticed it. For all those who turned out/will turn out not to be so lucky: Lots of love
1965 at the age of 15 I went to my doctor for help because I was homosexual (didn’t use the term “Gay”then) . All he said to me is “well, you have two balls don’t you?” I’m now 71 and never found the love of my life or a soul mate.
It’s not just coming out. You have to have a certain relationship with someone to begin with. I came out YEARRRSSS ago and my parents still know little about my life. It’s not like you come out and instantly are closer. Sure it was eye opening to them but that’s it. My parents are “supportive” but never ask me anything about my life ever. But they don’t really ask any of there kids anything. Your very lucky to have parents that sound like they were loving affectionate people. My parents accept and “ support” me, but they don’t really know me or make an effort to.
I live with them so I should say they know me but don’t really really know me. They never ask anything. They have never made any attempts to get to know me. They don’t know most my interests. They don’t know my fav color or fav food. We hardly talk ever. They have said they love me soo that’s good I guess, but you wouldn’t know it lol other then fact they let me live here for cheap rent but that’s less love and maybe they feel obligated. Anyways always super jealous to hear heart warming stories of ppl being close to there parents or there parents being warm and affectionate.
This video made me cry since I've been debating since the beginning of this year about coming out to my parents sometime this month. I've watched a lot of coming out stories on this channel and others, trying to gauge how my parents would react to this (maybe negatively). I'm at a point in my life where withholding who I am is holding me back in being authentic, happy and achieving my goals. No matter the reaction, good or bad, I thank you Michael for sharing your story.
id312474 I am praying that your parents realize that love is love and that there is nothing wrong with you. I don't know how old you are or if you are living at home. Please be safe if you are living with parents and not independent be sure that you will not be thrown out. There are so many organizations that can help you contact one of them. You are not alone and remember you are beautiful and there is nothing wrong with you. May God Bless you and keep you safe.
Best Wishes -- Be careful. Have a backup plan if possible. That is, have a friend, another family, somewhere you can stay a while if your parents freak out and refuse to accept you and kick you out. They might come around after initial shock. Or they might be so-so and need time to adjust. Or they could be fine with it. They may know already and be OK with you, or they may know yet they don't want to see and face that. They may say all sorts of things, and you might too, in the heat of the moment. So please be prepared. Decide when you feel it's right and best for you to come out to them. If you decide to wait until you are living on your own after high school, say, then that's OK too. If you feel like your parents would not kick you out and would not be hostile and judging you the rest of the time, then OK, maybe come out while you're still living at home. If your parents are OK with it, great! You can also test the waters by seeing how they respond to things in the news, or to the question of being gay in general, or if you have friends who might be gay, things like that, before coming out. That can help you gauge how they'd take the news that their son or daughter is not straight. -- And hey, just because anyone like me answers, please listen to your own heart and mind about this. We don't know your family/home or school/work situation, or your personality, physical situation, etc. So we can't know what's the ultimate best answer for you. If you have friends around who can accept you, if there's a local teen shelter, if you can get a job to begin saving money for your future, if you can work toward living on your own, these are all good ideas anyway. (Hey, I don't know your details and don't need to, so I'm being general here.) Best Wishes. When you are ready to tell people, do, and I hope you have a good, happy, healthy life, and find somebody terrific.
If you believe your parents are reasonable people and you feel safe with them (if you do not, then I would NOT recommend this) you should try to come out of the closet. If your parents are good people, they will love and support you no matter what, and show you the love and compassion you need and deserve. And if they don’t, then I will.
whatagreatcoffee , if you’re already out on your own, then do it. If not then wait until you are so you’ll be on equal ground. And if they’re not supportive then simply cut contact.
Loving parents like that are so uncommon, even today. My parents' love was very conditional. There were so many unwritten rules and invisible lines I had to stay within that doing so was basically a full time job. It was only decades later when I found myself consulting in the human services fields that I learned how messed up that truly was.
I appreciate your story but, I have to say most people in the LGBTQ community I have spoken to says they wish they had never come out of the closet because, it destroyed their relationships with family. It is sad that I hear this so much and they always say that what they do in the privacy of their rooms as far as sex is concerned should not have been something that defined them as a person. I agree with that in the sense of what you do sexually in private should only be known to you and who you are doing that with. Why does LGBTQ seek and need the acceptance and approval from people that so obviously will always believe they are unnatural and even find them disgusting and sick? What is the driving need to force acceptance out of them? I don't get it.
The same logic can be applied to heterosexual people. Us gay people get tired of heterosexual society forcing their lifestyles on us as well. Overall,I dont think we are forcing people to accept us. We simply want to live our lives in peace with the same freedoms that other people enjoy. No one deserves to have to endure discrimination because they are heterosexual or homosexual. Visibility is part of our fight because it forces people to challenge their deep seated bigotries.
How fortunate you are to have had such loving, supporting parents. It shows in you as well, in your "well-adjustedness," and your caring attitude toward them as well. Every kid, gay or straight, deserves parents who are on their side and leave no doubt about it.
You are very lucky your parents were so supportive. I recall when I was 11 years-old, my mother said right in front of me, "I'd rather be dead than to know one of my children was gay." My parents know, but we never discuss it. As long as you ignore it, it is not real. I'm truly very happy for you.
I told my Dad. He said he loved me. Said I could never tell my Mother. And that if I respect him I would never bring it up again or tell her. Sadly, that was way better than I thought it would turn out. And I told him because he was far more understanding a person than my mother.
Okay, so basically, your father says he loves you yet doesn't want to know sh*t about your lovelife and makes your respect for him depending on whether you act against yourself or not? This man doesn't deserve respect.
Yuzu Maybe not. Add on top that he was an alcoholic and gambled to a point we almost ended up homeless. I don’t have any delusions that he was good person. But he was still my Dad.
@@kevinh811 Sorry to say it so harshly, but family is people caring for you, wanting your best and supporting you. The way you describe your dad - he's not your family, neither is your mum.
@@kevinh811 Well, okay then. I just wish you the best of luck, and that you get out of there ASAP...it's not healthy to surround yourself with destructive people, so please put your own health first. Good luck!
What we need is a world where telling your parents your gay has as much impact as telling them you prefer chocolate milk to regular. Parents should care that their kid is happy not which gender makes them happy.
I have always firmly believed that God has a fantastic sense of humor; that's why he gives gay children to homophobic parents and He basically says, "There, now YOU deal with it and then tell me how you really feel."
I agree! There is a price to pay when we point our noses in the air and tell God what kinds of people we will love and won't love. My dad was super homophobic and now his job is to learn to love the very thing he said he hated. Love and light my friend!
I've tried all my life to be a "known homosexual", but nobody ever seems to remember or recognize me. Maybe if I was as cute as this guy...
I laughed so had at the "known homosexual" bit, especially when he told his father that he was actually a known homosexual.
I always find the phrases used by homophobes to describedf us quite funny, like when they say homosexuality is a "moral genocide" or an "organic disorder"...like wtf what is an "organic disorder"??? lol
Adam Leo Not sure what an organic disorder is. Veganism, maybe? Lol.
Him: Hey what are you doing?
Me: Destroying the nuclear family, what are you doing?
Panala Please tell me that’s sarcasm. First of all, you don’t get to decide who goes to Hell. Unless Jesus is paying you to keep the Judgment Seat warm till He gets back. And I very much doubt that’s the case. It’s your job to love your neighbours and let God sort it out. It is not your job to threaten people with God’s wrath. Look to your own sins and not the sins of others. Mother Julian of Norwich told us that doing that puts a veil before your eyes and obscures your view of God, and she was right. Work out your own salvation and let others do the same. Second, don’t presume that because someone is gay, they don’t know God. I have plenty of evidence in my life that God loves me, gay or not. So much so that the rantings of a Bible thumper who is far from the Gospel while being able to quote it chapter and verse won’t shake my faith. The most that’s going to do is encourage me to pray harder for them. Third, and most importantly, remember that St. Paul says the best thing to be is celibate, and if you can’t be celibate, then marry. So, tell you what, why don’t you try to control your heterosexual urges and live the pure celibate life that St. Paul says is best, and leave the rest of us to deal with our urges? After all, it’s not like Jesus worshipped the family the way Evangelicals do. He called several men away from their wives and families to follow Him. I can’t help but think that if people like you had been alive back then, you’d be calling Jesus a socialist and a home wrecker. Lol
Wf Coaker it’s how homophobic Christians sugarcoat their hate. So yes, it’s sarcasm
petre Tepner bahahah! I know right!
I always knew my son was gay so I tried to educate myself as much as possible about it. I would always let him know I loved him unconditionally. When he came out at the age of 16 yrs old I was forever trying to " fix" him up with cute boys. We still laugh about it today. I eventually did get to dance at his wedding 7 years ago. He is happy so I am happy I love my son in law. No mother can ask for more for her children except grandkids still waiting. Lol
I'm actually crying at this rn,my parents won't even talk about me being gay
Marvelous Superhero WOW ! That's your response to a young kid who is gay shame on you. What are you doing on this page ???? What makes you an expert on gay sex ??????
Darren Cooper Darren it is hard I know but maybe you just need to give your parents time. In the meantime find someone you can talk to it really does get better. I don't know how old you are or if you stay at home. Just remember you are a beautiful person and perfect just the way God made you. There is nothing wrong with being gay don't let other people's negativity bring you down. Your mantra should be everyday " I am Darren and I am Awesome , Period !!!!!! Please don't listen to fear mongers on gay sex , educate yourself. Gay or straight sex have the same risk factors, some straight couples engage in anal sex but there is more to gay sex than anal. I am a Nursing Sister and the mother of a gay son so please don't listen to so called experts on social media. Be safe sending you hugs and lots of kissesxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Marvelous Superhero not sure she hates god more like she's a decent human being with empathy and sympathy
Marvelous Superhero actually about ten percent of the population is gay
*goes up to parents of a random guy from the neighborhood*
"Excuse me Mam. I would like you to know that your son has been seen with KNOWN HOMOPHOBES. You may want to take care of that before they turn him into a KNOWN HOMOPHOBE as well. Have a nice day!"
LMAO
LMAO
+ gece How did the caller know these guys were 'known homosexuals'? hmmm
LMAO
I think this mother in my neighborhood may say that to my mom, she probably would say, “excuse me ma’am, I would like you to know that your daughter has been seen with known homosexuals. And until she stops hanging out with them she can not hang out with my daughter.” I srsly think my friends mom would say that to my mom about me.
I’m a. 63yr old gay man with a much older Gay brother named Pat. When Pat was about 18 or 19 Dad confronted him saying that he’d found out that Pat had been seen around town with known homosexuals and threatened to throw him out. Pat simply smiled and called Dad on the fact that he knew for a fact that Dad had a cute little Latino boyfriend he kept on the side! Needless to say dad was furious, Pat got tossed out and all hell broke loose. I was 5yrs old at the time and missed out on all the drama. 15yrs later I came out as gay, Mom lost it, but Dad just shrugged and chuckled and just kept eating his breakfast LOL! I had no idea about Dads bisexual antics until years and years later, long after he had passed. Pat was 72 at the time and casually told me this story over drinks...what a family.
Raven Dearest,that truly is a story!
You know what they say, the family that prays together stays together. It's sad that so many parents treat their gay kids like this, even going to the extreme measure of throwing them out, especially when a parent has his own skeletons rattling in his own closet.
To be honest, when parents are this toxic, and full of fire brimstone and BS, it's usually better for the gay or lesbian kid when he or she minimizes or even eliminates contact with his or her messed up toxic parents. I know it hurts like hell for a kid to go through this, and I know a few people who were thrown out of their house after they came out to their parents, but if a young adult can work thru these issues and move on with his life in a healthy manner, he or she will be much better off.
Short story long.
I had been nervous to tell my parents I am gay for years, but when I met my first somewhat serious boyfriend, I finally did.
My dad would rather avoid the subject, so my mom had "no-one" to support her with her dilemma.... She called her sister the next day (did I tell you I had dealt with it on my own for years?)
It was decided (not by me) that all their siblings would be privy to "her" secret if the subject ever came up in conversation, but that their mother, my grandmother, would be spared the burden.
I moved abroad to live with my boyfriend the year after.
My parents have been very supportive and my mom has made the long journey to visit me and my boyfriend several times.
I went back about once a year, sometimes with my boyfriend, sometimes alone.
One of these times I happened to be back in my parents home on my birthday, and my grandmother called my mother to say her "happy birthday to your son".
I picked up the phone, to my grandmother's happy surprise. We talked a little and she finally asked how long I was staying and when I was going back.
I answered only 10 days and leaving day after tomorrow.
To which she replied... "Yeah you can't leave your boyfriend alone too long, if you love him"
Nobody had "officially" told her. She had understood her children's innuendoes and as we later learned she had proudly told some of her friends that she had a gay grandchild. She must have been well in her 80's at the time. So proud of her.
She definitely was ahead of her time and loved you unconditionally
I read the title and I was just like “me too my dude”
(Also his hand writing is astoundingly beautiful)
"You may want to take care of that before they turn him into one." That just blows my mind. You cannot turn a person into being a homosexual. Either you are one or you're not.
@Suicidal Vet There is no such thing as being turned gay because you are molested. People that believe that are not that bright
@Suicidal Vet Your comment is stupid. NOBODY is ever turned gay. Even if they are molested. Homosexuality is an immutable trait. Either you are born with it or you're not.
@Suicidal Vet Again, your comment is stupid. Nobody is ever turned gay. There are no reputable studies that show this. Only ignorant people and religious fanatics believe that nonsense.
@Suicidal Vet Your kind leave abusive, rude, and inconsiderate comments about and to gays and lesbians all the time. My comments were factual,not abusive, rude, and inconsiderate. If you took them that way that's your problem.
Suicidal Vet once again, just like before can you supply actual evidence?
I love these oral histories and feel so proud to know and learn from them. Thank you, Michael!
vbflyboy thanks Shelton. ❤️
He's sure got a lot of oral history. And probably anal too.
@@stringer-ik1pc .....TACKY!
A very kind man. I can see that he has great parents.
I came out to my parents when I was 21. They suggested electric shock therapy, but I said, no I'm good thanks. They seemed to accept it but my dad masked his opinion for most of his life. He was very controlling and occasionally abusive towards my mum. Towards the end of her life she became ill and as the elder son, it fell to me to help arrange her care as he wasn't being a responsible adult at that point, and that was something that he resented even though I tried to keep my interference to an absolute minimum. He was very difficult and abusive with both me and my brother and we wouldn't accept that so we distanced ourselves from him. When he died, he disinherited both me and my brother, and he wrote a four page letter to his executor where he told him how to 'manage' me if I contested the will. His real opinion came out in that letter, four pages of hate. I had a fundamental weakness of character because I was gay, could never stick at anything, had no morals or ethics. This was not an image any of my friends would recognise. He also suggested to the executor that if I contested the will, they should speak to my long term partner because he would 'see sense'.
I saw the letter the week before he died. I had gone to the house to pick up some things to to take to his care home, and as happens in the UK, they had reached the point where they decide whether the State or the Estate should pay for his care. I had power of attorney, so I had to look through his stuff to try to find out how to administer his affairs. When I read the letter, I thought, 'you accept this, you really are a doormat'. Everything else is 'dutiful son', this is 'doormat'. I took his stuff up to the care home and dropped it off, and explained to the nurse that I wasn't coming back and I said why. He died about 3 months later. I knew he had died as soon as I woke up in the morning and so did my brother. We both just felt this overwhelming sense of relief.
I arranged his funeral, I wrote and delivered his eulogy, and none of his friends would have realised what he'd done. I knew they'd been told things about me but I didn't think it was fair to taint their memory of him and I wanted them to maybe at least question what they'd been told. I still remember looking down that church and seeing angry faces glowering at me but most of them softened by the end of the service.
My brother and I decided to just walk away, a surprisingly easy decision to make.
In the longer term, what he did was kill his own legacy. We didn't go back and take anything from our childhood home, because he'd made it clear he didn't want us to have it, and nobody else wants that stuff, so his life ended up in a skip.
We are both doing fine. He wasn't much of a dad growing up, but it does make it easier to move on if there is nothing there to miss.
Wow! Why do you think he wouldn't leave anything to you or your brother? You two didn't ask to be born. Part of being a parent is leaving your inheritance behind. Sounds very selfish!!
I think he was mad as hell that he couldn't control us any more. We were prepared for that. I don't think we were expecting the 'skip' effect, the feeling that your childhood is a dead zone and it doesn't belong to you any more. Far worse things have happened to other people on this thread, we survived, and knowing that you can walk away from something like that does give you a peculiar sort of resilience.
Mine wasn't as bad as yours. But still, there was little to miss. When he died I'd just gotten medical clearance (after open heart surgery) to go back to work on the condition that work I only two hours with a one hour break for a nap in between. My mother and sister were incensed that I couldn't make the six hour drive and to this day they refuse to speak to me. I later found out that they told people I had an 'infection' instead of the truth. Why? Good question.
Thank you for this. It is lovely. I cried when you spoke of your father telling you he was proud of you in seeing how you lived your life in light of the challenges you faced. I had a similar conversation with my father on a family pilgrimage to Bosnia in 1993. Several years later he presented me with a picture of the Blessed Mother and said it was in memory of "when we met." I was initially confused but then it dawned on me how important that moment had been to him. He died a year ago at 97 and I miss his unconditional love but I feel his presence with me. Thanks for reminding me of this most precious blessing. Your parents sound wonderful.
You're lucky, my father got a phone call from a high school counselor I had confided in. He beat me unconscious and when I woke up, some of my clothes were stuffed in a garbage bag. My father told me to get out and don't come back. I was 17.
Mike Davis No kid deserves that. I'm sorry that happened to you. Hope you're in a good place now.
Michael DeMartino, thank you. I’m doing good these days. Happy with the life I have built for myself.
Wow
No one deserves that, I'm sorry you didn't have good supportive people around you then, I hope you do now and that you're living a much better life.
I'm so sorry Mike. All I can say, as twisted as it sounds, is that your father did you a favor. No child should have a parent whose love is conditional. You were better off without such a negative influence in your life. Sending (unconditional) love to you.
I'm sorry you lost your partner, Michael. I know how it is to lose someone you love like that.
The best thing to do is wait until you have graduated high school and are out on your own if you have to “come out” to your parents. Then you’re on equal footing. If they turn out to be unsupportive then just move to a distant metropolitan area and cut contact. You’ll make ‘your own’ family. It’ll be THEIR loss....not yours.
William... easier said than done. Keep in mind, anyone who moves away from home under that kind of pressure will feel like an exile -- uprooted, bereft, dispossessed. Yet you are right, and that is the worst part. I gave you a thumbs up with regret.
@Flenif2247 Or just across town.
@Flenif2247 If you have to light out I recommend New York bc everything happens there. There's a niche for everyone and a lot of cheap restaurants.
@Flenif2247 With the death of rent control everywhere is too expensive. I've known people who rented out a closet. True. I have a friend who has rent subsidy. He's been in the same apt for almost 50 years. His rent is $1500 a month. The same non-subsidized apts in his building are $15,000 a month. Manhattan is no longer affordable for working people. But there are the boroughs.
I would have said - move to San Francisco, but guess I'm thinking Haight Ashbury days.
Video is beautiful. I just cant get over the fact that people think you can ‘turn’ someine homosexual. Like bish!?
We are not zombies or vampires. We are just the most fabulous people you’ll meet
Take a joke? We say we're fabulous because people like you say things like this.
And if/when we wing up in hell, it is going to be the most fabulous place you could be!
Shiny Smeargle lmao yeah ... you can’t “turn” someone into a homosexual. Everyone knows you have to watch magic mike at midnight during a thunderstorm
@@pinkpanther7442 So are you an atheist homophobe? Hmm that's quite interesting actually
So instead of religion, your hatred of gays stems from... what?
Saying we all have low IQ's is a gross misrepresentation of all of the gay academics, scholars, and inventors throughout history. Alan Turing and Nicola Tesla are great examples. What is it that truly makes you hate us?
On a somewhat related note, can someone tell me why people think religion somehow makes anyone " immune " from being gay or straight?
I mean, you hear about gay people who said they prayed for the longest time to be made straight, but yet you never hear about straight people praying to....remain(?) straight.
Unlike the guy in this video, my parents barely said anything to me about sex and I have never asked my siblings if it was the same for them. What my father told me about sex would fit on a postage stamp. Yet, my mother, when she hear the Navy was transferring me to San Francisco, was the one who told me it was a gay Mecca....I had no idea what she was talking about (it was the late 70s).
My Beloved Mother, still going strong at 85 years young, needed to know directly from me why my marriage ended abruptly, after being outed by someone who saw me in a gay bathhouse, and told my ex wife’s close friend. Adding to a Lifetime of her iconic and comical responses, was this: “Steven, I love you no matter what, but after 5 children that’s a fine how do you do,”
That must have been some divorce!
S. Hurd You got that right
What a nice man, and full of wisdom.
This story is beyond incredible! His parents are such strong people to actually use their brains when I'm sure everyone around them were of a differing opinion.
I love the Catholic therapist had the strength to not follow the church's views and instead follow his training. I'm sure this therapist helped the parents come to terms with what they already knew, that it was ok to love and support their son.
“Your son has been seen with known homosexuals “
-said the man who probably had the hots for his son and felt guilty.
Jon Compos,you got that right! Two men my Father knew....put a hit on me,and they were both Married ( to women) living their LIES!
Or maybe a rejected.
Ya, the funny part is, where was he when he saw these encounters and what was he looking for.
@One Vast and Ecumenical Holding Company 😂👍
Making a phonecall like that anonymously is so amazingly cowardly.
What a blessing this guy had in his loving parents. It’s ok for parents or people in general not to understand being gay if they are not gay themselves.. but to not understand something and still love and accept a person and to have dialogue and compassion is everything we all want. Wonderful video.
That and a willingness to try and understand not refusing to learn
Straight ally from the speaker's hometown of Louisville here. Shout out from da Ville, and our strong LGBTQA community!
I love your Dads later reaction..
almost word for word what my Dad's was. At first he had a rough time with having a gay son and he actually blatantly favored my brothers ,it I got strung out on meth and he begged me to come home and get clean and work with.hom and I did and after a bout a year we were driving home from work and he told me how proud he was of me. He said "Of all my boys...". He had really supported me those months and he helped me get clean.
What percentage of people have a positive experience of coming out? It’s such a hard and scary thing, especially at that time. It’s nice to hear stories of such loving parents.
Eventually.
You truly have wonderful parents.
I’m bisexual and I never told any of my friends or family, I’ve never came out. I just rocked up one day with a guy then another day with a girl and I never bothered to explain myself. I kept thinking all my friends and family would say something but they could care less and we never talk about it lol I’m happy so that’s enough for them.
@Suicidal Vet go away, stop saying molestation is a reason for being gay, it's not, and I hate you for using that as an argument
A woman in my acting class told be all homosexuals were molested. I was 17 and I knew it was complete BULLSHIT, but I basically said NOTHING because I hated conflict. I hope I get to tell her how wrong she is and slap her across the face one day.
The first person I come out that I was gay. That’s my sister . I cried and said that
“I’m not straight I’m gay”
The answer I got from my sister is👇
#I don’t care what you are straight , Circle, triangle or square .I love you because you are my brother”
WTF..Her answer made me speechless !!
😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳
Her answer made my tears stop flowing.
And made me had hard laughed😂😂😂
It may not be the best answer .But I love it.
It´s still mortal sin. Is that more important than the salvation of your soul? It´s not because it´s socially acceptive that is o.k. God´s laws are eternal.
What a lovely man. He exudes peace and contentment. We should all be so blessed.
Question. ... how is one TURNED gay? Happy your parents were so loving and supportive.
Because people think sexuality is a vice, much like alcohol or smoking, and one "turns" out of peer pressure.
@Suicidal Vet funny I was never pressured into being gay in fact I was terrified when I found out I like guys in junior high being gay is not a choice there's scientific research to prove it please educate yourself.
@Suicidal Vet Are you speaking about yourself? Were you pressured into becoming gay? You are popping up under a lot of comments on this video
@Suicidal Vet You're not being considerate and opened minded by spreading the lie that people are turned gay by being molested. These types of lies hurt not only gays who are struggling with their sexuality but heterosexual people who were molested as children. There is no reputable evidence that shows that anyone can be turned gay by any means
Suicidal Vet outstanding claims require outstanding evidence other than ones personal experiences since there is no way of knowing whether that person is telling the truth or not.
Every child deserves parents like yours.
I remember when my told me he was gay, we my daughter and myself were grateful he told us i couldn't be more proud of my son and daughter two wonderful children and now 3 wonderful grandchildren
I know that is not important but....the calligraphy in the letter eas stunning!
Thanks. Product of the Catholic school system 🤷🏼♂️
For those who are having a hard time, times are changing bit by bit. I live in an quite socially liberal city but when I was a kid, "gay" was considered a massive insult. Now, almost nobody gives a damn.
Incredibly beautiful. Perfect example when your parents surprise you in a positive and loving way❤❤❤
"Your son had been seen around town with known homosexuals"
*Turns in heels*
"That BITCH! 👹"
So glad that he spoke about his Dad's words to him all those years later. If I could give advice to my younger self it would be that not all parents can adjust immediately. It took years for ME to process the fact that I was gay and parents can't be expected to do so overnight. I lost several years with my Dad by not realizing that - don't let it happen to you
All that matters to me is that my son is happy! What I hate about myself is not knowing whether if I wasn't gay, whether I'd be so accepting. What if I was homophobic? ☹️
Makes me so happy to hear a good story about loving parents. My parents accepted me as well and it makes me so angry when I meet other gay people and find out their parents kicked them out for being gay. No one deserves that kind of pain.
Mikey speaks so honestly. I'm so glad he had decent people for parents. Humans can be very ugly but also very beautiful.
Thank you Michael for sharing your story.
‘Talks about his sick partner’
Comment Section
‘Talks about how he looks like a daddy’....sounds about right.
Religion has destroyed so many families.
At my nephew's wedding rehearsal dinner, one of his friend's who I have known since they were in 8th grade, came up to me and came out. He introduced me to his partner. They were both very nervous. I was struck dumb and didnt know what to say....because I already knew he was gay. I knew it from the first time I met him. I didnt want to say oh honey I already knew that. It seemed wrong. So after a long pause, I just hugged him and said what possible difference could that make to me and how I've felt about you all these years?. I embraced his partner and told them I hope they were happy, and if all went well, I would be honored to be invited to their wedding someday. (Same gender marriage was not legal at that time which I always thought was stupid). I couldn't care less if my son were gay. I love him unconditionally. And forever.
What's sad is that there needs to be a "coming out" at all. I know people, mostly men, who were always gay and everyone knew it. There were no big secrets to hide and so no need to reveal them. I would like to live in a time when "homosexual" is not a big thing.
You know, I had pretty much the same done to me. Why do people think it's cool to inform on you? It never made any sense to me and only annoyed me.
Yeah well I made it know to the party that narc'd on me that it wasn't cool to do that.
@@kd1s How long was he in the ICU?
@@hrh4961 For five days.
@@kd1s Zowie!
@@hrh4961 Four days. Then transferred to a normal room.
A parent cannot love one child more then another.... so not true! But, I am very glad this man had a very supportive and loving parents.
What a nice guy, and what wonderful parents. Honestly, I was waiting for that BUT moment when his father found out , and it was never spoken.
His parents may be proud of him, but I'm proud of both the parents and him.
NEVER try to force your kid to come out!!!
My dad did the usual "I love you no matter what" and the "whatever said man to man stays between us"... My dad knew I was gay and kept trying to force me to admit to it. I never did, and sadly never got the chance to tell him. This part hurts, as no matter how many times he said the "man to man blah blah" speech, the few times in my 18 year old life at the time, I did tell him (some not so important) a few things he had to keep quiet about, he failed... So and again it hurts to admit, I couldn't trust that he would keep it to himself.
Looking back, I would have came out to him, but at the same time I wasn't ready for anyone else to know... that and he would have kept me away from my bf (20+ years later that bf is still in the closet and why we broke up)... that I definitely know he would have kept us apart.... The sad part is that he passed away just before I graduated HS... He was 41.... The scary part, i just hit 40 not to long ago...
Wonderful as so these videos most often are. They're always beautiful, but sometimes quite sad and humbling.
I wish so much I could have been able to go to my parents and tell them that I was in love with another guy and after telling them, hear them say "it's okay, we love you regardless and we hope that you are happy" but the complete opposite happened. Ever since I have been forced to live a straight life. The world still has so much to learn about love and tolerance. I have missed decades of been with someone I love because I had to keep the family happy and unashamed of me.
Manny Baquero you owe nothing to your family. Even if you love them. Live your life.
Bran M. Fuck them mate don’t let their bigoted views control your life. What a selfish family u have.
this story is beautiful. I am glad his parents were so welcoming.
I remember being kind of blackmailed into seeing a gender specialist by a disgruntled partner but it was the best thing as the professional was really professional and encouraged me to be who I wanted to be make friends or partner with who I felt like and accept the fact I knew I wasn't male but never felt feminine and as a result I have had a pretty happy gender fluid life. His message back in the early 1980s was gender is a spectrum and you don't actually choose where you fit on it. you recognise where you are and you will be happier if you accept that and live your life accordingly rather than playacting
The person who called!!! Unbelievable.
I think TH-cam has figured out that I’m not straight judging by this being the 5th time I’ve seen a driftwood video in my recommendations XD
Planeboy 2520 🤦♀️ oh no. Do you think TH-cam might tell your parents?🙀
I came out at eight.. sitting in the back seat of the car, I just randomly said “mom, dad, I think I might be bi”.
They were cool with it and I later learned that they’d talked about the possibility when I was a baby: that was a bit disturbing to be told.
Now I’m partners with the best person ever and I’ve finally found friends. I’m only 18, so there’s still a lot ahead.
Hows that disturbing? It's nice to know that they were talking about it that early. Always having the possibility your child might be gay is good because it shows that they will love you no matter what
what wonderful parents Michael had/has! Thanks for sharing this very well done personal story. And that "catholic therapist" was cool too!
So good to hear a story like this without demonizing people for their faith.
It's a blessing hearing how older gay people dealt with coming out in an age that was far less open-minded than the one we fortunately live in now.
I'd love to see the FBI list of "Known Homosexuals"
It is so weird that some parents think they are being generous when they say things like “oh we love you no matter what”. But actually their job is to love their children unconditionally right?
Good therapist that told your parents you were well adjusted.👍.
Ignorance is so destructive. After at least 12 years of “education” yet so many people are ignorant to the bone about homosexuality. How can this be? Being gay is not a choice any more than I have a choice about my skin or hair color or my height. Ignorance and hate are everywhere.
How the fuck could you not support your child, no matter what
I'm about the same age and I had a remarkably very similar scenario with my folks. Very religious. Very accepting. Almost no questions. They accepted my partners and were very close to us. I didn't have a partner with HIV . . but several very close friends - - they were very loving and caring toward them. I had a partner at one point who's parents were not religious and were more liberally accepting and he held it against my folks for being as conservative as they were.(needless to say - that was instrumental in ending that relationship). Sadly - though - there were times that I felt the church was more important than family . . but . . I understood why. Thank god times have changed and much progress has been made. I kinda do feel like part of a pioneering generation for the LBGTQ movement.
This testimony brought tears to my eyes. Love is so strong!
What awesome, supportive, absolutely fantastic parents you had. I am sure you know how lucky you were in this life to have them. The horror stories out there.
Thank you for sharing this story.
Merci, Michael!
"you should probably do something before they turn him into one."
how is it any of your goddamn business how I raise my own children.
It’s 20 years today that I came out !
Congrats!!!
Sp what
As a person my opinion about gays never was negative. Now as a mother at the first moment my daughter said to me she’s gay YES is a lot of things I don’t understand about be a gay or have a children gay is a lot to know to learn but never ever give my back to my beutiful and lovely daughter.
If someone needs you support if is in the closet be a support. We need to support each other’s.💖🙏🌸
I like this channel. I'm very much heterosexual, I don't have any openly gay friends/relatives. But like everyone, I'm aware of the inequality and IMO strange beliefs of people with regard to homosexuality and LGBTQ in general. You hear so much 'controversy' and views of extremes, but rarely the quiet everyday people just living their life. This channel has so many video's of just kind decent human beings not trying to make a big fuss about who they are, just want to live their life happily like everyone else. It's refreshing to see, to be emphasised we're all the same, regardless of sexuality. Why is it even an issue?
@Suicidal VetI generally disregard them as i hear/see them, so they don't spring to mind. Umm... 'it's a sickness', 'ungodly', 'responsable for AIDS existing', 'can be passed as a contagion by association', 'is not natural', so many random weird things. All of which are completely factless and rediculous.
@Suicidal Vet No less natural than the many sexually transmitted diseases out there, man made objects for self pleasure, infections and diseases of the urinary tracts, surgical operations to stop pregnancy, drugs and special diets to increase pleasure, ability, or prohibit pregnancies etc. All as a consequence of reason to engage in an intimate act...
You highlight the rare and worst cases as a reason. You can do that for literally everything/anything man kind does.
If you are that concerned with problems arrising from intercorse, you should support doing away with the act all together. reproduction does not require intercourse. that leaves on pleasure, and if that isn't a reason enough, then simply don't partake of intimate relations at all, no risk of bad things happening then.
@Suicidal Vet so why are you here ? Suicidal
NZScruffy thank you!! ❤️
@Suicidal Vet did you do that yourself, read a comment and stop your gay ? Lol
how to get teeth that white !!
myworld426 semen
Al Phalfa bitch
All About Beebo oh c'mon you know it was funny
Al Phalfa it really wasn’t funny
A Phalfa Tried it, doesn't work.
My mother is really accepting of my life and she has really accepted my partner and really gets on well with him it is a very different story with my father who hasn't spoken to me for 33 years it is his choice he is still my father and i have the utmost respect for my dad but whatever I try to do he still won't talk to me I get on with my life and just hope one day he will talk to me
If everyone would learn to take care of their own business and problems their hands would be too full and would not have the time to worry about what someone else is doing
Bravo John!
Right
I´m happy my parents were completely cool with me being homosexual. My stepfather just said with so much sarcasm in this voice: Oh, really. Never noticed it.
For all those who turned out/will turn out not to be so lucky: Lots of love
@Suicidal Vet My father was completely cool with it
My mother just ignores it...
1965 at the age of 15 I went to my doctor for help because I was homosexual (didn’t use the term “Gay”then) . All he said to me is “well, you have two balls don’t you?” I’m now 71 and never found the love of my life or a soul mate.
As long as you're alive you still got time to find those things, yeah?
It’s not just coming out. You have to have a certain relationship with someone to begin with. I came out YEARRRSSS ago and my parents still know little about my life. It’s not like you come out and instantly are closer. Sure it was eye opening to them but that’s it. My parents are “supportive” but never ask me anything about my life ever. But they don’t really ask any of there kids anything. Your very lucky to have parents that sound like they were loving affectionate people. My parents accept and “ support” me, but they don’t really know me or make an effort to.
I live with them so I should say they know me but don’t really really know me. They never ask anything. They have never made any attempts to get to know me. They don’t know most my interests. They don’t know my fav color or fav food. We hardly talk ever. They have said they love me soo that’s good I guess, but you wouldn’t know it lol other then fact they let me live here for cheap rent but that’s less love and maybe they feel obligated. Anyways always super jealous to hear heart warming stories of ppl being close to there parents or there parents being warm and affectionate.
I was disowned at 17! I never saw my foster parents again.
This video made me cry since I've been debating since the beginning of this year about coming out to my parents sometime this month. I've watched a lot of coming out stories on this channel and others, trying to gauge how my parents would react to this (maybe negatively). I'm at a point in my life where withholding who I am is holding me back in being authentic, happy and achieving my goals. No matter the reaction, good or bad, I thank you Michael for sharing your story.
id312474 I am praying that your parents realize that love is love and that there is nothing wrong with you. I don't know how old you are or if you are living at home. Please be safe if you are living with parents and not independent be sure that you will not be thrown out. There are so many organizations that can help you contact one of them. You are not alone and remember you are beautiful and there is nothing wrong with you. May God Bless you and keep you safe.
Best Wishes -- Be careful. Have a backup plan if possible. That is, have a friend, another family, somewhere you can stay a while if your parents freak out and refuse to accept you and kick you out. They might come around after initial shock. Or they might be so-so and need time to adjust. Or they could be fine with it. They may know already and be OK with you, or they may know yet they don't want to see and face that. They may say all sorts of things, and you might too, in the heat of the moment. So please be prepared. Decide when you feel it's right and best for you to come out to them. If you decide to wait until you are living on your own after high school, say, then that's OK too. If you feel like your parents would not kick you out and would not be hostile and judging you the rest of the time, then OK, maybe come out while you're still living at home. If your parents are OK with it, great! You can also test the waters by seeing how they respond to things in the news, or to the question of being gay in general, or if you have friends who might be gay, things like that, before coming out. That can help you gauge how they'd take the news that their son or daughter is not straight. -- And hey, just because anyone like me answers, please listen to your own heart and mind about this. We don't know your family/home or school/work situation, or your personality, physical situation, etc. So we can't know what's the ultimate best answer for you. If you have friends around who can accept you, if there's a local teen shelter, if you can get a job to begin saving money for your future, if you can work toward living on your own, these are all good ideas anyway. (Hey, I don't know your details and don't need to, so I'm being general here.) Best Wishes. When you are ready to tell people, do, and I hope you have a good, happy, healthy life, and find somebody terrific.
If you believe your parents are reasonable people and you feel safe with them (if you do not, then I would NOT recommend this) you should try to come out of the closet. If your parents are good people, they will love and support you no matter what, and show you the love and compassion you need and deserve. And if they don’t, then I will.
whatagreatcoffee , if you’re already out on your own, then do it. If not then wait until you are so you’ll be on equal ground. And if they’re not supportive then simply cut contact.
@Suicidal Vet children can't consent two male adults can you have to be the most ill informed individual I've had the displeasure of encountering.
Loving parents like that are so uncommon, even today. My parents' love was very conditional. There were so many unwritten rules and invisible lines I had to stay within that doing so was basically a full time job. It was only decades later when I found myself consulting in the human services fields that I learned how messed up that truly was.
What a kind man and a very moving story. Thank you.
I appreciate your story but, I have to say most people in the LGBTQ community I have spoken to says they wish they had never come out of the closet because, it destroyed their relationships with family. It is sad that I hear this so much and they always say that what they do in the privacy of their rooms as far as sex is concerned should not have been something that defined them as a person. I agree with that in the sense of what you do sexually in private should only be known to you and who you are doing that with. Why does LGBTQ seek and need the acceptance and approval from people that so obviously will always believe they are unnatural and even find them disgusting and sick? What is the driving need to force acceptance out of them? I don't get it.
The same logic can be applied to heterosexual people. Us gay people get tired of heterosexual society forcing their lifestyles on us as well.
Overall,I dont think we are forcing people to accept us. We simply want to live our lives in peace with the same freedoms that other people enjoy. No one deserves to have to endure discrimination because they are heterosexual or homosexual. Visibility is part of our fight because it forces people to challenge their deep seated bigotries.
So inspirational ❤️
How fortunate you are to have had such loving, supporting parents. It shows in you as well, in your "well-adjustedness," and your caring attitude toward them as well. Every kid, gay or straight, deserves parents who are on their side and leave no doubt about it.
What a beautiful account of you & your folks.
Thank you for sharing - this has helped me understand my relationship with my folks & family.
Thank you.
My parents were very supportive with me being gay. I’m very lucky.
Nice to know that some parents were/are supportive.🙃
You are very lucky your parents were so supportive. I recall when I was 11 years-old, my mother said right in front of me, "I'd rather be dead than to know one of my children was gay." My parents know, but we never discuss it. As long as you ignore it, it is not real. I'm truly very happy for you.
I am so grateful to have supportive parents!
What a beautiful story. My eyes filled with tears of love for your parents. You were remarkably gifted with such a loving Mother and Father.
I told my Dad. He said he loved me. Said I could never tell my Mother. And that if I respect him I would never bring it up again or tell her. Sadly, that was way better than I thought it would turn out. And I told him because he was far more understanding a person than my mother.
Okay, so basically, your father says he loves you yet doesn't want to know sh*t about your lovelife and makes your respect for him depending on whether you act against yourself or not? This man doesn't deserve respect.
Yuzu Maybe not. Add on top that he was an alcoholic and gambled to a point we almost ended up homeless. I don’t have any delusions that he was good person. But he was still my Dad.
@@kevinh811 Sorry to say it so harshly, but family is people caring for you, wanting your best and supporting you. The way you describe your dad - he's not your family, neither is your mum.
Yuzu it’s ok, you’re not the first person to say something like that to me about my parents.
@@kevinh811 Well, okay then. I just wish you the best of luck, and that you get out of there ASAP...it's not healthy to surround yourself with destructive people, so please put your own health first. Good luck!
How wonderful that you had loving parents. Sorry for your loss.
What we need is a world where telling your parents your gay has as much impact as telling them you prefer chocolate milk to regular. Parents should care that their kid is happy not which gender makes them happy.
Ok you got me with the title.
I have always firmly believed that God has a fantastic sense of humor; that's why he gives gay children to homophobic parents and He basically says, "There, now YOU deal with it and then tell me how you really feel."
I agree! There is a price to pay when we point our noses in the air and tell God what kinds of people we will love and won't love. My dad was super homophobic and now his job is to learn to love the very thing he said he hated. Love and light my friend!
He's so lucky his family wasn't as violent and ignorant as most parents even to date are.
An unusual and unique story. Heartwarming. Quite opposite from my experience or most I knew.
Also very thought provoking. Cheers
"A known homosexual", LOL!
Bless that Christian therapist!