THINGS FROM ARKANSAS THIS IS TOTAL BS. A MAN CHOOSES A WOMAN IF HE LIKES THE WAY SHE LOOKS IT DOESN'T MATTER HER MORALS IT SEEMS WITH SOME OF THESE GUYS THAT CREEPY THEIR CREEPS THEY JUST LIKE IT BUT HOW THE WOMAN LOOKS AND THAT'S IT IT DOESN'T MATTER IF SHE'S GOOD OR A BAD PERSON THESE MEN ARE SUPERFICIAL AND THEY HAVE NO MORALS
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS A LOT OF THIS FROM MY OBSERVATIONS THROUGHOUT ALL THE YEARS IN THE UNITED STATES IS THAT MOST MEN ARE SHALLOW THEY DON'T CARE IF IT'S A NICE WOMAN A GOOD COOK A CLEAN WOMAN A WOMAN LIKES TO COOK AND CLEAN AND DO ALL THESE THINGS NOW THEY WANT THE THE LOOSE WOMAN THEY JUST GO BUY LOOKS THEY'RE VERY MISOGYNISTIC IN THEIR MINDSET AND SUPERFICIAL THEY LIKE A TRASHY LOOKING WOMEN PROVOCATIVE LOOKING THAT'S ALL THEY CARE ABOUT THEY HAVE NO MORALS KNOW GOD GET YOU A CHRISTIAN MAN
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS A LOT OF THIS IS VERY TRUE A LOT OF IT IS NOT MOST MEN JUST CARE ABOUT LOOKS AND WOMEN AND THAT'S IT THEY DON'T CARE IF SHE'S A GOOD PERSON TRY TO EVEN IT'S EVEN HARD TO FIND A GOOD CHRISTIAN MAN GIVE ME A BREAK WE LIVING IN END TIMES MEN ARE CREEPS LOVE YOURSELF DO YOUR OWN THING TRAVEL HELP THE POOR IN THE HOMELESS WHO CARES ABOUT ALL THIS AND ATTRACTING A MAN DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF LOVE GOD DO THINGS YOURSELF A GOODNESS SAKES STOP WASTING TIME ON TRYING TO GET SOME DUDE THEY'RE ALL DYSFUNCTIONAL MOST OF THEM ARE PERVERTED
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS FROM ALL MY OBSERVATION MEN ARE GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AND MORE NARCISSISTIC THEY DO NOT LIKE GOOD WOMEN OKAY THEY'RE LOOKING FOR JUST THE LOOKS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT MORALS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT PERSONALITY IT SEEMS FORGET IT DO YOUR OWN THING LOVE YOURSELF WOMEN STOP WORRYING ABOUT MEN GO TRAVEL HELP THE POOR IN THE HOMELESS LIVE YOUR LIFE MEN ARE A WASTE OF TIME THEY HAVE THEM ARE THEY HAVE MENTAL ISSUES OKAY AND THEY'RE VERY NARCISSISTIC AND MISOGYNISTIC IN THEIR THINKING THEY ARE A HORRIBLE ABUSIVE PEOPLE AND GETTING WORSE WOMEN NEED TO GO LIVE THEIR OWN LIFE BELIEVE IN YOURSELF MY GOSH STOP WATCHING THESE STUPID VIDEOS THEY'RE CRAZY IT JUST CATERING TO MEN WHO IS ABOUT ALL POWER YOURSELF GO LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE AND BE HAPPY AND BE AT PEACE AND NOT BEING ABUSED BY THESE NARCISSISTIC MEN
1:58 "do i feel more alive in her presence?" 3:55 "is she just a fling or something more?" 5:38 "is she feminine and sensual?" 7:45 "does she have boundaries and values?" 9:22 "does she need me in her life?" 10:44 "is she passive-agressive, entitled, a drama seeker?"
An avoidant guy will reject you no matter what. You can be all those things and more and one day he is going to find a silly reason to disappear. The key is in being connected to yourself, what Ben mentioned in this video. It saves you on so many levels.
Studies show that if you give wife benefits (sex) to a man before you're his wife, he will begin to lose interest, regardless if he is avoidant or not.
If you're a virgin, making him wait might make sense. If you've been with 5+ guys, especially if some/none didn't have to wait, he's wasting his time, you're playing games and at 120-150 dollars a date, you're also getting too expensive. If he spends 2 years at 2 dates a week courting you, the dates will go from 120 probably going up to around 1000 a date by the end of that period. If he marries you he'll figure the price will just keep going up. Most guys figure the costs (emotional, physical and financial) are not worth it.
Met up with my ex husband after being divorced for ten years. We discussed the possibility of reconciliation. We went on a date and continued to communicate throughout the week. Saturday rolls around and he texted me stating we should visit one another during the weekend since the weather was so great. I didn’t respond right away; I was tired and wanted to spend the weekend resting and doing some work at home. That evening I expressed to him I was exhausted and had too much to do on such short notice. Besides, I expressed it was too soon to begin visiting one another’s homes and wanted to continue dating before spending extended time at his home or my home. Besides . . . We only went out on one date and I want to take time to get to know one another again. I don’t want to put myself into a venerable situation where we are rushing into sex. Yes. I told him I am not ready to be physically involved at this time. I received no response. He is still the same. Will leave him alone.
If both of you do decide to continue dating I would highly suggest getting professional support (ie couples therapy) before deciding to commit to one another.
Don't fall into that trap. You divorced for a reason. Don't get all nostalgic, and only remember the good times. Remember the reasons why you broke up. Clearly, he doesn't respect you, or your needs.
@@-Clarence- That's the problem with you men. You expect everything, without putting in the effort to show someone you are worth it, and willing to do the work it takes to make things right, and to know you are in it for the long term. It shows that ALL you care about it sex, and not the person. Then you have the nerve to be upset if your girl has bedded lots of men! Sorry but the dating coach would NOT be on your side!
I'm single because I choose to be unless and until I fall madly in love with head and heart. Not been interested in anyone the past 4 years. If I come across that amazing partner that would be awesome, and if not it's perfectly fine, my life is still beautiful and full of love🙏♥️
My husband does not allow my emotions and drama's to get in his head. He knows that I'll be okay after a few minutes, an hour or two and when I come back, nothing changes. We're still as crazy to each other than ever before ❤❤❤❤
You have such a warm charisma and still seem to be so strong and assertive. It always makes me happy to watch good men like you. It makes me more confident that there are more out there 🤗✨
you really are my fav relationship coach, realized it when you simplified fling versus the real thing. So many others complicate with this and this category and like 3 -5 categories. But you kept it simple, thx!
1. Do I feel alive in her presence? How connected are you as a woman to your life force ? 2. Is she a fling ( exciting. Hot nice to ne with for a moment) or the real deal ? How easy is it for him to Connect with you ? If he knows he has to work for it … 3. Does she feel connected to her feelings and sensuality? Be present in your body. Is her Mind and heart acting in unison. 4. Does she know herself to be high value? ( does she have boundaries and knows how to express them? 5. Does she need me in her life ? Bonus: is she a drama queen ? Passive Aggressive ? High maintenance?
@@BernMendez i believe the concept of relationship need to be preceived differently. Within each of us is the potential to do "good" or "bad" so the outlook to be considered is how can we maximize the greater good together, if u r not selfish, otherwise it will turn into how can one use the other. I know of someone experience in marrying a narc and did not realize the narc bad behavior til 15 yrs into the marriage but by then a businesa was bulit home was created and a partnership of commitment on other levels was made. The cheating became more prevalent after 20yrs when the narc decided monogamy was not for them and they separated on good terms after the healing if hurt and betrayal was forgiven and put aside, yet still support each other in bus and other areas without the marriage bed. With that being said approach relationship like a business see what fulfillment can be achieved by both and be willing to separate based on boundries made.
Wow an ancient concept of a loving relationship for life, is was unexpected and heart warming to hear......100% agree, being your authentic self, creates a ripple effect, to your king or queen, your children, your family, your community.......you presented in such an authentic style that is easily understood, informative and a healthy way of loving, severing and enjoying your king. Thank you
True, who needs drama or a high maintenance man? What you forgot is a sense of humour!!! Emotions are human, but you have to be able to laugh things off a bit.
I like this, and... I feel like 1 and 3 require a personality transplant for me. I am friendly but an introvert, usually a listener vs expressive, and a reflective intellectual. I don't know what “aliveness” and “expressive” means while still being true to my natural temperament. Open to suggestions.
It means going 1% more into sharing who you are, dating to make eye contact, being present and In tune with your emotions and erring on the side of expressing a bit more vs pushing your emotions down.
I love and needed to hear this! I’m very grateful 🙏 I m divorced and with a man that’s married now for past.4 years we live together he’s had no contact with wife 4 years but won’t get a divorce ! I’m wasting my life 😮
Every true drama queen I've ever met has guys RUNNING after her. You can say what you will and most men will probably say: no way! no drama for me! But out in the real world, consciously or not, most guys I know- mostly among my friends and co-workers- they RUN to the drama! - also not suggesting women should try this as a dating tip - no way! - but please.... just observe among friends and at work what you see! Who is chasing who! Lol! Otherwise - very good video. Thank you!
Yes! good additions! I worked with a woman - and every man that came in to our business, she'd put the flirt on so deep! the guy would leave thinking- wow! this woman gave me such a great deal! I am probably even gonna get sex out of this! In the end they'd get almost nothing and no attention to their problem- which would normally have to be handled by someone else in the office- because she didn't like doing any paperwork! She had our boss at the time wrapped around her finger too! Her whole life was one dramatic episode into the next. One crazy excuse why she was late or out sick or why her life was in turmoil!! She'd put her hair up in a high pony tail hair piece and had 6 inches of wrinkly cleavage (years of tanning beds and no lotion!) hanging out of her uniform! I guess wrinkly cleavage is still cleavage! I never once heard her apologize to anyone or admit she was wrong and if anyone made any critique of her work, she'd go full out ballistic and attack them til they backed down! Relentless! Somehow, she manipulated her way to the top and she's now become our boss and we are still doing her job! She still comes and goes as she pleases and guys are still running to her like a moth to a flame- and getting all excited over her sexy innuendos- but then getting nothing in return! It's hilarious to watch! @@deadlifts_steaks.
I find this to be true as well. When I pretend to be the drama queen every guy wants to please me, but I am not a drama.queen naturally and I have to fake it and I hate it because it's not me. I think it Is because they confuse drama with the woman valuing herself which is often not true the women is actually a bit crazy and the guy gets stuck in an unhappy relationship down the road with a person like that. So I think it says a lot about men who like drama queens and that is they actually don't value themselves.
Thank you so much !!! I get approached all the time BUT I am the girlfriend fling and not the keeper - now I know why ..... I also find myself dating "below" my standards but.... I am doing it and now I am doing a lot of soul searching and questioning myself why .....Thank You
I heard somewhere there's a saying that when a man is ready for family/commitment, he will have the right woman and a woman is ready when she found the right man.
LOVE THIS!! Especially the part about femininity. It’s something that I’ve been wondering if I have enough of. Only because there’s so much mixed information about it. The way you explained it made me smile because I’m absolutely feminine! Thanks😊
Okay I have a topic for you. What if you are very attractive but you look young! I am 30 who looks like I’m 18-23. I want to attract an older man. Does this make a difference in your opinion? I think it attracts a certain type of man. Please do a video on this! I think men don’t approach me bc I look so young and on top of that I’m very attractive so maybe they are afraid? Idk I work as a waitress even to give more chances bc I do not get approached in the real world.
Aliveness in presence- feeling excitement & connectedness, joy, uniqueness, openness, expressiveness to activate his heart Fling=exciting and cool; not able to introduce to mom; marriage material = delayed physical affection Polarity, openness, expressing your light, clear & unfiltered, acting in coherence with mind & heart Personal sense of self-worth: you understand your own value, what you value, and maintaining boundaries Needs: do you need *him* in your life? Does he satisfy your needs, does him being in your life make things better, cannot live without? Conscientiousness: not being High maintenance, Drama, Passive-aggressive, Entitled, bringing Problems without being solution-oriented
A man one time told me I was playing a passive aggressive game...but I don't know what that means. Could you please tell me what that means. I would like to know, so that I can make meaningful change in my life.
Honestly, I hate all these games that men and women play with eachother....I really am just over it. Honestly, all it does is create trama, and gosh, your partner is the last person that should create that in you.
What does it mean to "put the weight of their challenges on mine without doing the same thing for me"? Note - in watching this, I'm noticing that I was in relationship with someone that called me "Drama." I was confused because I was vocal and communicative but now I see that they fulfilled your list to a tee and they were projecting . . .
Yes! Say no. Have some class, some good boundaries! Let him know you know your own value, and can draw the line about what you do or don't need. You can clearly and kindly let him know you are not available to every man. He doesn't know or value you if he pressures you for sex.
Hi, i met with man in 2022 but never dated him until November last year. We are living together, though i have my own apartment . He introduced me to his Mum, Son and Baby mama. He was cool until recently his ex for 14 yrs is coming to visit him when im at work. What can i do. Im mad at him.
My share here is if you find a guy valuable here are some ways he'll evaluate you. It's not that it's men's role to find women valuable or not it just so happens that both men and women do this evaluation constantly. Hope this helps.
Do you believe that we need to find ourselves before we find a partner, so that we know ourselves? I think it is great what you are saying, but I do feel that we also need to be fulfilled on our own without the guy and be able to æive just as a fulfilling æife without him...
If he’s a truly good guy honestly looking for a relationship, he’s not going to be sleeping around “judging” girls on whether or not they sleep with them, those men are for the streets. Any guy sleeping around a copious amount is not looking for a relationship; they are looking for short term fun and are no good. Even if they managed to get into a relationship they will eventually cheat which defeats the purpose. Stay away from men who sleep around.
No One Wants High Drama Mama, but HE NEEDS TO Take Responsibility to COMMUNICATE WITH HER... To AVOID passive aggressive moody b- itchy 💩. Because When a Woman feels Safe, Because she IS SAFE... 99% Of Drama Caca Doesn't happen. If he's Unavailable, Please Expect Drama Queen...
Like I feel like it's not even worth it anymore. I just want to be myself. Why is it THAT hard lol. If they don't like me, then whatever. Who are they? Lol. If they pick me, then what to I really get? A stupid husband that I can "show off" to the world that I've finally gotten married? What's the point??! Lol. Or an accidental pregnancy?? I may even be too old for kids anyway.
Sounds like you've had a rough time. I'm sorry to hear this. Hope these videos help inspire a NEW vision that is more exciting than what you just shared : )
This is tough. We have never met physically. We met online over a year ago. He's very handsome and successful. He wants to finally meet in person. In Miami. He lives in Italy and I live in the United States He wants us to be together for a week. We say we love each other, if we sleep in the same bed, how can we not have sex? I think I love him. But I worry that being intimate with him will ruin my chances of a long term relationship.
That's something you need to talk to him about. If you are not keen in being intimate the first time seeing each other let him know. Get connecting rooms.
Most of this doesn't apply for divorced men over 50... Because they crave validation and physical satisfaction - i.e. when was the last time a woman adored him physically? And no - not all of them want a 30 y/o girl
Expressing your feminine side is less about a strong personality and more about feeling, expressing and being connected to your light and vulnerability. Hope this helps : )
But I do love him. But he told me he needs to figure out what he wants. There’s a third party involved. However we talk about everything. I’m patient. I hope he will choose me.
If you bail, I bet he will come after you. Be strong. If he does you’ll be gratified and if he doesn’t you’ll understand how he really feels. You will leave with your head up and your self esteem enhanced.
[Take My Free Quiz]: What's the #1 Reason You're Single: bit.ly/youresinglequiz
THINGS FROM ARKANSAS THIS IS TOTAL BS. A MAN CHOOSES A WOMAN IF HE LIKES THE WAY SHE LOOKS IT DOESN'T MATTER HER MORALS IT SEEMS WITH SOME OF THESE GUYS THAT CREEPY THEIR CREEPS THEY JUST LIKE IT BUT HOW THE WOMAN LOOKS AND THAT'S IT IT DOESN'T MATTER IF SHE'S GOOD OR A BAD PERSON THESE MEN ARE SUPERFICIAL AND THEY HAVE NO MORALS
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS A LOT OF THIS FROM MY OBSERVATIONS THROUGHOUT ALL THE YEARS IN THE UNITED STATES IS THAT MOST MEN ARE SHALLOW THEY DON'T CARE IF IT'S A NICE WOMAN A GOOD COOK A CLEAN WOMAN A WOMAN LIKES TO COOK AND CLEAN AND DO ALL THESE THINGS NOW THEY WANT THE THE LOOSE WOMAN THEY JUST GO BUY LOOKS THEY'RE VERY MISOGYNISTIC IN THEIR MINDSET AND SUPERFICIAL THEY LIKE A TRASHY LOOKING WOMEN PROVOCATIVE LOOKING THAT'S ALL THEY CARE ABOUT THEY HAVE NO MORALS KNOW GOD GET YOU A CHRISTIAN MAN
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS A LOT OF THIS IS VERY TRUE A LOT OF IT IS NOT MOST MEN JUST CARE ABOUT LOOKS AND WOMEN AND THAT'S IT THEY DON'T CARE IF SHE'S A GOOD PERSON TRY TO EVEN IT'S EVEN HARD TO FIND A GOOD CHRISTIAN MAN GIVE ME A BREAK WE LIVING IN END TIMES MEN ARE CREEPS LOVE YOURSELF DO YOUR OWN THING TRAVEL HELP THE POOR IN THE HOMELESS WHO CARES ABOUT ALL THIS AND ATTRACTING A MAN DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF LOVE GOD DO THINGS YOURSELF A GOODNESS SAKES STOP WASTING TIME ON TRYING TO GET SOME DUDE THEY'RE ALL DYSFUNCTIONAL MOST OF THEM ARE PERVERTED
GREETINGS FROM ARKANSAS FROM ALL MY OBSERVATION MEN ARE GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AND MORE NARCISSISTIC THEY DO NOT LIKE GOOD WOMEN OKAY THEY'RE LOOKING FOR JUST THE LOOKS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT MORALS THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT PERSONALITY IT SEEMS FORGET IT DO YOUR OWN THING LOVE YOURSELF WOMEN STOP WORRYING ABOUT MEN GO TRAVEL HELP THE POOR IN THE HOMELESS LIVE YOUR LIFE MEN ARE A WASTE OF TIME THEY HAVE THEM ARE THEY HAVE MENTAL ISSUES OKAY AND THEY'RE VERY NARCISSISTIC AND MISOGYNISTIC IN THEIR THINKING THEY ARE A HORRIBLE ABUSIVE PEOPLE AND GETTING WORSE WOMEN NEED TO GO LIVE THEIR OWN LIFE BELIEVE IN YOURSELF MY GOSH STOP WATCHING THESE STUPID VIDEOS THEY'RE CRAZY IT JUST CATERING TO MEN WHO IS ABOUT ALL POWER YOURSELF GO LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE AND BE HAPPY AND BE AT PEACE AND NOT BEING ABUSED BY THESE NARCISSISTIC MEN
1:58 "do i feel more alive in her presence?"
3:55 "is she just a fling or something more?"
5:38 "is she feminine and sensual?"
7:45 "does she have boundaries and values?"
9:22 "does she need me in her life?"
10:44 "is she passive-agressive, entitled, a drama seeker?"
Thank you ❤
🫶🏾
❤
Thank you 😎🤟
You’re a sweetheart
Thank you for this ❤
An avoidant guy will reject you no matter what. You can be all those things and more and one day he is going to find a silly reason to disappear. The key is in being connected to yourself, what Ben mentioned in this video. It saves you on so many levels.
I agree, an avoidant human will not connect in ways most healthy women feel fulfilled with. Glad this was helpful : )
Studies show that if you give wife benefits (sex) to a man before you're his wife, he will begin to lose interest, regardless if he is avoidant or not.
@@juliabliss1477 Source of the “studies?”
@@richerDiLefto most men feel that way because he needs to connect with you emotionally before the physical, that's where you use boundaries.
@@juliabliss1477 Why on Earth would you marry a man you haven't slept with? How do you know if he can make you happy in bed, or if you're compatible?
A smart woman loves herself first. Period. Definitely, make him work for your attention. If he falls short during dating, he'll be worse as a husband.
I’ve had to explain that, “I’m not playing hard to get, I am hard to get “.
@@cleomiller6844hard to get is hard to want
If you're a virgin, making him wait might make sense. If you've been with 5+ guys, especially if some/none didn't have to wait, he's wasting his time, you're playing games and at 120-150 dollars a date, you're also getting too expensive.
If he spends 2 years at 2 dates a week courting you, the dates will go from 120 probably going up to around 1000 a date by the end of that period. If he marries you he'll figure the price will just keep going up.
Most guys figure the costs (emotional, physical and financial) are not worth it.
🎯👌
Met up with my ex husband after being divorced for ten years. We discussed the possibility of reconciliation. We went on a date and continued to communicate throughout the week. Saturday rolls around and he texted me stating we should visit one another during the weekend since the weather was so great. I didn’t respond right away; I was tired and wanted to spend the weekend resting and doing some work at home. That evening I expressed to him I was exhausted and had too much to do on such short notice. Besides, I expressed it was too soon to begin visiting one another’s homes and wanted to continue dating before spending extended time at his home or my home. Besides . . . We only went out on one date and I want to take time to get to know one another again. I don’t want to put myself into a venerable situation where we are rushing into sex. Yes. I told him I am not ready to be physically involved at this time. I received no response. He is still the same. Will leave him alone.
If both of you do decide to continue dating I would highly suggest getting professional support (ie couples therapy) before deciding to commit to one another.
Don't fall into that trap. You divorced for a reason. Don't get all nostalgic, and only remember the good times. Remember the reasons why you broke up. Clearly, he doesn't respect you, or your needs.
You don’t wanna have sex with him and expect to get back together? Doesn’t take a dating coach to see this is terrible 😂
@@-Clarence- That's the problem with you men. You expect everything, without putting in the effort to show someone you are worth it, and willing to do the work it takes to make things right, and to know you are in it for the long term. It shows that ALL you care about it sex, and not the person. Then you have the nerve to be upset if your girl has bedded lots of men! Sorry but the dating coach would NOT be on your side!
@@-Clarence-your way of thinking is truly mind blowing
I'm single because I choose to be unless and until I fall madly in love with head and heart. Not been interested in anyone the past 4 years. If I come across that amazing partner that would be awesome, and if not it's perfectly fine, my life is still beautiful and full of love🙏♥️
Blessings 💞
My husband does not allow my emotions and drama's to get in his head. He knows that I'll be okay after a few minutes, an hour or two and when I come back, nothing changes. We're still as crazy to each other than ever before ❤❤❤❤
It’s so true when you say see the world as it is not the way you wish it would be.
Thank you for watching, Katia : )
From the first seconds you are already giving clear information. This videos has a lot of value. Thank you very much!
You have such a warm charisma and still seem to be so strong and assertive. It always makes me happy to watch good men like you. It makes me more confident that there are more out there 🤗✨
Thank you Sonja for your kind words.
Healthy, mature men, you mean, right?
Yes and some of these apply to all men…
Which are few and far between...
Men not boys
@@BernMendezThis isn't actually healthy. Males that want to be needed are insecure and unhealthy.
@@BernMendezAll men???? 😂😂😂😂
Anyhoo I can tell you DONT date men! B
I think this is one of my fav relationship advice ever! Clear and concise, not drawn out, to the point. Thank you!
Glad it was helpful! :)
I found this very insightful in review of my past relationships and for moving forward as I come out of my 10+ year hermit phase
Selena, glad to hear you're coming out of a 10 year introspection period : )
you really are my fav relationship coach, realized it when you simplified fling versus the real thing. So many others complicate with this and this category and like 3 -5 categories. But you kept it simple, thx!
1. Do I feel alive in her presence? How connected are you as a woman to your life force ?
2. Is she a fling ( exciting. Hot nice to ne with for a moment) or the real deal ? How easy is it for him to Connect with you ? If he knows he has to work for it …
3. Does she feel connected to her feelings and sensuality? Be present in your body. Is her Mind and heart acting in unison.
4. Does she know herself to be high value? ( does she have boundaries and knows how to express them?
5. Does she need me in her life ?
Bonus: is she a drama queen ? Passive Aggressive ? High maintenance?
Thanks for watching.
@@BernMendez i believe the concept of relationship need to be preceived differently. Within each of us is the potential to do "good" or "bad" so the outlook to be considered is how can we maximize the greater good together, if u r not selfish, otherwise it will turn into how can one use the other. I know of someone experience in marrying a narc and did not realize the narc bad behavior til 15 yrs into the marriage but by then a businesa was bulit home was created and a partnership of commitment on other levels was made. The cheating became more prevalent after 20yrs when the narc decided monogamy was not for them and they separated on good terms after the healing if hurt and betrayal was forgiven and put aside, yet still support each other in bus and other areas without the marriage bed.
With that being said approach relationship like a business see what fulfillment can be achieved by both and be willing to separate based on boundries made.
Every point is valuable. Your words about being feminine resonate especially ❤
Thank you Olda :)
Wow an ancient concept of a loving relationship for life, is was unexpected and heart warming to hear......100% agree, being your authentic self, creates a ripple effect, to your king or queen, your children, your family, your community.......you presented in such an authentic style that is easily understood, informative and a healthy way of loving, severing and enjoying your king. Thank you
You're most welcome, Michelle : )
Men need to watch this. They can learn a lot.
It's very refreshing to hear you talk about relationships. It's lovely how you express men in such a respectable manner.
Valerie, glad you found this useful.
True, who needs drama or a high maintenance man? What you forgot is a sense of humour!!! Emotions are human, but you have to be able to laugh things off a bit.
I like this, and...
I feel like 1 and 3 require a personality transplant for me. I am friendly but an introvert, usually a listener vs expressive, and a reflective intellectual.
I don't know what “aliveness” and “expressive” means while still being true to my natural temperament.
Open to suggestions.
I love how u talk and keep it true to yourself. That whole message tells me you are funny and interesting. So no need to change 😊
It means going 1% more into sharing who you are, dating to make eye contact, being present and In tune with your emotions and erring on the side of expressing a bit more vs pushing your emotions down.
I love and needed to hear this! I’m very grateful 🙏 I m divorced and with a man that’s married now for past.4 years we live together he’s had no contact with wife 4 years but won’t get a divorce ! I’m wasting my life 😮
Please get some help to figure out a solution and not find youself in the same frustrating situation four years from now...
Oh myyyyyy….Really? Desperate much? Run girl RUN! 🤯😳😝😔🏃🏼♀️ 🏃🏼♀️🏃🏼♀️🏃🏼♀️🏃🏼♀️🏃🏼♀️🏃🏼♀️😞
Every true drama queen I've ever met has guys RUNNING after her. You can say what you will and most men will probably say: no way! no drama for me! But out in the real world, consciously or not, most guys I know- mostly among my friends and co-workers- they RUN to the drama! - also not suggesting women should try this as a dating tip - no way! - but please.... just observe among friends and at work what you see! Who is chasing who! Lol! Otherwise - very good video. Thank you!
Absolutely true. I am so glad you wrote this. Based on my observation, men run behind drama queens, passive aggressive, toxic attention seeking women.
Yes! good additions! I worked with a woman - and every man that came in to our business, she'd put the flirt on so deep! the guy would leave thinking- wow! this woman gave me such a great deal! I am probably even gonna get sex out of this! In the end they'd get almost nothing and no attention to their problem- which would normally have to be handled by someone else in the office- because she didn't like doing any paperwork! She had our boss at the time wrapped around her finger too! Her whole life was one dramatic episode into the next. One crazy excuse why she was late or out sick or why her life was in turmoil!! She'd put her hair up in a high pony tail hair piece and had 6 inches of wrinkly cleavage (years of tanning beds and no lotion!) hanging out of her uniform! I guess wrinkly cleavage is still cleavage! I never once heard her apologize to anyone or admit she was wrong and if anyone made any critique of her work, she'd go full out ballistic and attack them til they backed down! Relentless! Somehow, she manipulated her way to the top and she's now become our boss and we are still doing her job! She still comes and goes as she pleases and guys are still running to her like a moth to a flame- and getting all excited over her sexy innuendos- but then getting nothing in return! It's hilarious to watch! @@deadlifts_steaks.
Yes. My experience also, including with my sisters.
I find this to be true as well. When I pretend to be the drama queen every guy wants to please me, but I am not a drama.queen naturally and I have to fake it and I hate it because it's not me. I think it Is because they confuse drama with the woman valuing herself which is often not true the women is actually a bit crazy and the guy gets stuck in an unhappy relationship down the road with a person like that. So I think it says a lot about men who like drama queens and that is they actually don't value themselves.
Yup
Thank you so much !!! I get approached all the time BUT I am the girlfriend fling and not the keeper - now I know why ..... I also find myself dating "below" my standards but.... I am doing it and now I am doing a lot of soul searching and questioning myself why .....Thank You
One strong and precise decision can change the course of your life forever. Glad this was helpful. 😊
I heard somewhere there's a saying that when a man is ready for family/commitment, he will have the right woman and a woman is ready when she found the right man.
Excellent advice. Agreed! Your presentation of this topic is a breath of fresh air.
Nice video. Couldn't find the link to the quiz.🤔
It's in the description but I'll place it here too: bit.ly/youresinglequiz
LOVE THIS!! Especially the part about femininity. It’s something that I’ve been wondering if I have enough of. Only because there’s so much mixed information about it.
The way you explained it made me smile because I’m absolutely feminine! Thanks😊
Thank you
I am a woman and believe its the best video i have ever see
Glad you found this useful : )
So, so good, Bern! Thank you!
You're so welcome!
All sounds like work...guess I am not ready for someone...yet.❤
There is no rush on this 😊🙏
Muchas Gracias, muy cierto! Bendiciones! Mi primera vez en tu canal.
Okay I have a topic for you. What if you are very attractive but you look young! I am 30 who looks like I’m 18-23. I want to attract an older man. Does this make a difference in your opinion? I think it attracts a certain type of man. Please do a video on this! I think men don’t approach me bc I look so young and on top of that I’m very attractive so maybe they are afraid? Idk I work as a waitress even to give more chances bc I do not get approached in the real world.
So inspiring video and instructions in the link! Thank you! ❤
Aliveness in presence- feeling excitement & connectedness, joy, uniqueness, openness, expressiveness to activate his heart
Fling=exciting and cool; not able to introduce to mom; marriage material = delayed physical affection
Polarity, openness, expressing your light, clear & unfiltered, acting in coherence with mind & heart
Personal sense of self-worth: you understand your own value, what you value, and maintaining boundaries
Needs: do you need *him* in your life? Does he satisfy your needs, does him being in your life make things better, cannot live without?
Conscientiousness: not being High maintenance, Drama, Passive-aggressive, Entitled, bringing Problems without being solution-oriented
Thanks for watching!
Again, great video Bern💯
Love this video! Thank you for sharing ❤️
A man one time told me I was playing a passive aggressive game...but I don't know what that means. Could you please tell me what that means. I would like to know, so that I can make meaningful change in my life.
Tit for tat. He takes 3 hours to respond so you take 6.
Honestly, I hate all these games that men and women play with eachother....I really am just over it. Honestly, all it does is create trama, and gosh, your partner is the last person that should create that in you.
One by one is eleven!
When you find the right companion. 🎉
What does it mean to "put the weight of their challenges on mine without doing the same thing for me"?
Note - in watching this, I'm noticing that I was in relationship with someone that called me "Drama." I was confused because I was vocal and communicative but now I see that they fulfilled your list to a tee and they were projecting . . .
Great points! 👍🏻
This was a great video👍
Great video - thanks Bern ❤
My pleasure. Catherine.
Wonderful presentation 👏 👌
Thank you : )
Yummy 😋 I love ❤ your content Bern. So soo good and on pt. Grateful for you and how you share with us 🙏
Thank you for watching and for your kind words. 🙏
4:54 what if he initiated the physical contact? He wanted me at his place 2-3 dates in? An I supposed to say no?
Yes! Say no. Have some class, some good boundaries!
Let him know you know your own value, and can draw the line about what you do or don't need. You can clearly and kindly let him know you are not available to every man.
He doesn't know or value you if he pressures you for sex.
Love this, thank you.❤
Most are men children. Mature men do not need fakery
Thanks for watching.
Good advice ❤
Glad it was helpful.
Thank you sencerely
You're welcome!
🧡Love🧡this🧡video🧡
3:42 I am sad i feel like I was too scared to share this with him. He is not realistic but my passions are about bags
Cute girls with good personalities get the guy too! ❤ Loved this video
Gina, glad you enjoyed this : )
Thank you
You're welcome : )
That doesn't always true
No ,I feel intense fear of him. He ghosted me, left me feeling terrified.
Hi, i met with man in 2022 but never dated him until November last year. We are living together, though i have my own apartment . He introduced me to his Mum, Son and Baby mama. He was cool until recently his ex for 14 yrs is coming to visit him when im at work. What can i do. Im mad at him.
Get help, your situation isn't easy to navigate alone so you make an empowered decision taking all the nuanced factors into account.
@@BernMendez Thanks so much. It's quite disturbing coz I don't understand why all of a sudden he is communicating with his ex and even visiting
Cool 😎 thanks for this
You're welcome.
lol I did have boundaries with this guy, but he’s toxic and so am I because I keep letting him back in 🥴🤦🏾♀️😭😭😭😭
I’m so emotionally connected. When I intimate with someone.
Men …CHOOSE…Women based on how they feel about themselves firstly….from my experiences….and then everything else he is looking for…..
Thank you for watching!
If there is no vibe none of all those tricks make anyone to commit.
My last relationship was with a covert narcissist. I don't trust men now. That's why I'm single
I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope you take some time to heal and Ideally get some therapeutic help to not let that relationship define your future.
SAMAPI😢TAHAP ITU PERUMPAMAAN AGAR KEADILAN DALAM BERKONGSI NIKMAT CINTA .
Thanks for watching.
I’m probably a drama unfortunately. I don’t know why I am like that. 😢
What if you did delay the sexual encounter for months with him and he is still treating you like you're just some fling what is up with that?
Why is it up to men what they seek and measure as valuable. Women time to make your standards known. But thanks for the video.
My share here is if you find a guy valuable here are some ways he'll evaluate you. It's not that it's men's role to find women valuable or not it just so happens that both men and women do this evaluation constantly. Hope this helps.
Do you believe that we need to find ourselves before we find a partner, so that we know ourselves? I think it is great what you are saying, but I do feel that we also need to be fulfilled on our own without the guy and be able to æive just as a fulfilling æife without him...
If he’s a truly good guy honestly looking for a relationship, he’s not going to be sleeping around “judging” girls on whether or not they sleep with them, those men are for the streets. Any guy sleeping around a copious amount is not looking for a relationship; they are looking for short term fun and are no good. Even if they managed to get into a relationship they will eventually cheat which defeats the purpose. Stay away from men who sleep around.
What happened to love at first sight, and the people them that knew she was the one at first sight those things still happen?
The world has gotten alot smaller with the influence of social media. The innocents of yesteryears have been molested by varing factors.
No One Wants High Drama Mama, but HE NEEDS TO Take Responsibility to COMMUNICATE WITH HER... To AVOID passive aggressive moody b- itchy 💩. Because When a Woman feels Safe, Because she IS SAFE... 99% Of Drama Caca Doesn't happen. If he's Unavailable, Please Expect Drama Queen...
Like I feel like it's not even worth it anymore. I just want to be myself. Why is it THAT hard lol. If they don't like me, then whatever. Who are they? Lol. If they pick me, then what to I really get? A stupid husband that I can "show off" to the world that I've finally gotten married? What's the point??! Lol. Or an accidental pregnancy?? I may even be too old for kids anyway.
Sounds like you've had a rough time. I'm sorry to hear this. Hope these videos help inspire a NEW vision that is more exciting than what you just shared : )
yea, so that was very clear, now I understand why man findig me attractive...unfortunatelly my energy got sucked up, by the wrong person..
This is tough. We have never met physically. We met online over a year ago. He's very handsome and successful. He wants to finally meet in person. In Miami. He lives in Italy and I live in the United States
He wants us to be together for a week. We say we love each other, if we sleep in the same bed, how can we not have sex? I think I love him. But I worry that being intimate with him will ruin my chances of a long term relationship.
That's something you need to talk to him about. If you are not keen in being intimate the first time seeing each other let him know. Get connecting rooms.
If I have to change myself for a man he’s not the right man for me
Very well said. I wholeheartedly agree.
Thank you for this.
My pleasure.
What do you do when he’s more interested in his sister and her friends than his wife?
Run
i wish u were there to tell me this when i was in my prime…
Cool video
Thank you!
Most of this doesn't apply for divorced men over 50... Because they crave validation and physical satisfaction - i.e. when was the last time a woman adored him physically? And no - not all of them want a 30 y/o girl
I’m so sad I slept with him so soon, but also I think it was for the best that he’s not in my life
Sorry you went through pain.
I look feminine...but I'm not. Can't help it - got a strong personality. Keep hearing got to be "feminine" ...so I'm stuffed.
Expressing your feminine side is less about a strong personality and more about feeling, expressing and being connected to your light and vulnerability. Hope this helps : )
YESSSSSSSSSS 🙏🙏🙏
He has pretty teeth
Edit:
Great, clear descriptions!
Thanks for watching : )
I think he is describing the type of man that would cheat because the boundary game ends eventually?
No, I'm just describing subconscious ways men evaluate a potential partner.
Pay attention to the content please …before criticism
Hmmmm. I connected physically with my man on the first night and it’s been 23 years… But good advice though.
Hey Girls , Houston Texas 😁 👍 has some Good , 👍 Handsome 🌹 Men , Whom work for Good Companies, ... You can have it 🌹 All ,,
A big no to Texas
Yeah, if you don't like us , keep I Ass away
😂🤣😁👌🙏🌹that's why Elon moved there and a Street 😁🌹 🦊 is named after him ...Go to where the Good 👍 Men Are girls
Videos sound isn't there
👌👌👌
❤️🔥
❤❤❤❤
But I do love him. But he told me he needs to figure out what he wants. There’s a third party involved. However we talk about everything. I’m patient. I hope he will choose me.
If you bail, I bet he will come after you. Be strong. If he does you’ll be gratified and if he doesn’t you’ll understand how he really feels. You will leave with your head up and your self esteem enhanced.
It is such a humiliating position you put yourself in. It is you who should choose. You deserve much better attitude to yourself than that.
@@Olga8888There is the problem….stop waiting to be chosen! Relationships are not an episode of The Bachelorette. YOU CHOOSE the man…not vice versa.
I'm single because I want to be single.
Naz, whatever makes you happy. Thanks for watching.
❤
Man drought area.
so not all man are choosing famfatale but more deeper than that 🧠💪no offense 😉
I'm not sure what you're talking about but thanks for watching ; )
🙌🏻🫰🏻
Thank you for watching.
😮
5 things men choose you for: big knockers, big bum, youth, beauty & wealth. Fact
Not all men choose women this way AND I'm sorry if this has been your experience.
Yes, there is something wrong with that. Stop with moral relativism.
Thanks for watching.