You’re smashing Vlogmas with a chronic illness and really tough life struggles. Your (and Claudia’s) honesty is very refreshing and I really appreciate you putting yourselves out there. Thank you for being yourselves ❤️
Just so awesome the way it starts out with honesty about how bad the day is for both, and moves through introspection to healing. Like a freakin 3-act play. I feel so much better. I hope you two do. My mom died years ago, but still Xmas is hard, because she was all about it.
I feel like Claudia's really on a journey of self reflection at the moment and I'm here for it. It's so refreshing to hear someone talk frankly about their feelings.
There literally the best couple ever, they know each other so well and take such good care of each other , there so kind and gentle with each other I wish I could find a relationship like this .........or a relationship at all😢
Please don't settle for anything, honey! I'm sure there's someone wonderful waiting for you out there, just hold your chin up and respect yourself enough to wait until someone worthy of you appears ❤
My grandfather was a farmer, so seeing Claudia digging a hole did literally remind me of him (utterly adorable). I'm glad she does something constructive to deal with her grief. Working with plants is very therapeutic, too.
Eveanna Goulding yeh same and people ask why are you in bed my exercise is I am disabled an why sit in a cramped in a wheelchair wen you can be comfortable and not in pain.
I'm 49 and it has been 25 years now. Didn't expect by flicking through dally paper had a moment that had an associated memory of tragedy. Was doing well until. Allowed myself a day on the couch watching screens.
When I realise it's one of those days I stop trying to be productive and think, "What can I do that I would utterly enjoy?" and do whatever the best answer to that is. It's the second day that devastates me.
There's an airway clearance system called The Vest that might be helpful for you. It's a vibrating compression vest that helps shake up the lungs. We had one for cystic fibrosis. Take care. Y'all are wonderful ❤️
I have cystic fibrosis and use my vest 2-3 times a day. It’s helped me so much. Unfortunately, the NIH in Britain doesn’t believe in it nor will they pay for it. They would rather shove antibiotics at their cf patients rather than give them equipment that will help them in the long run.
I love watching how you support each other. I think the general perception is that the non-disabled partner does all the supporting. It is wonderful to watch it go both ways. Additionally my darling lesbians this is the part where I remind you that straight couples dont always plan their pregnancies. I have 2 children who are happy accidents. We moved when the first one was 3 weeks old.
Always? My god, half of pregnancies are unplanned. I'd surmise that over half of pregnancies conceived "naturally" are unplanned. I can't name a single planned pregnancy that has ever taken place on the Catholic side of my family.
@@AutumnMoonlight95 thats a very ignorant view that you have, and that kind of view is harmful to those who need abortions. Theres a percentage in all the birth control types, that indicate a a failure which most probably leads to unwanted pregnancies. We are usually harassed for not using it, but most of the abortions that happen aren't form of birth control, but a last resort after birth control fails, rape, and similar.
Oh man when I was 9 years old my great grandmother had a heart attack and everyone panicked and cried, she recovered at that time but while I was too young to fully understand I was old enough to pick things up, so I went to our little garden and dug holes the whole day to plant some flowers it and since then I just have this thing when I'm too stressed or sad that I have to dig holes, so this is very relatable Claudia!
I understand how Claudia is feeling, especially as of late. I'm approaching my first Christmas without my best friend, who passed away on August 31. Christmas was always a big thing that we've celebrated together since we were eleven, and this is the first time I haven't decorated her tree with her, or exchanged gifts with her. I've felt the same way a lot of mornings these past few months. Lots of love 💕
Decorate a tree in her memory if you feel up to it. It takes a long time to adjust to a new reality after losing someone. It's important to hold onto traditions, especially if it reminds of someone dear, but only when you're ready. And give yourself lots of space to not be okay, the next year or two will be really important in caring for yourself, people often underestimate how much losing someone close will actually affect them.
She would have wanted you to be happy, to enjoy the sights, sounds and traditions of her big holiday. Going on isn’t leaving her behind. She is an intrinsic part of you. You carry her and all those wonderful memories with you.
IT is so important to acknowledge that it is perfectly alright to not have an amazing day every single day, especially during the holiday season. Of course we always hope to never have a bad day ever, but feeling down for any multitude of reason is perfectly normal. There seems to be so much pressure to "be in the holidy spirit", and I LOVE Christmas, but to be happy 100% of December is too much for everyone. Hope you and Claud feel better ASAP, but feel free to take time to feel bad for as long as you need!
I absolutely love watching the love between you and your wife. It makes this older CIS white male believe in humanity again. Thank you for your channel.
My sister died on December 23, 2015. I really sympathize with Claudia and how she feels this time of year. It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year. For some people this is the hardest time of the year. I’m glad she has a coping mechanism that works for her. You’re both adorable and deserve happiness. Much love ❤️
I love how you say "waking up on the wrong side of the bed", in German we say "Getting up on the wrong foot" and it means just the same. Also I love how you support each other!
I speak both French and German (though whether I speak them well is another matter entirely) and I just realised that I have been using "waking up on the wrong foot" in French for years
In danish we say "getting the wrong leg out of bed" which in hindsight is such a weird saying because you obviously get both legs out when you get up, but oh well!
same saying in the U.S. Oh. Claudia said a funny phrase that is a bit different than what I've ever heard - at 15:54 : "that will come back to eat us in the ass". we say "bite us in the ass". Funny how some sayings are exact all over, but some are changed up a bit. Which is fine. It's fine. lol
All my support to Claudia. I've lost both my parents and understand just how hard it can be. And in case she doesn't say it, THANK YOU for supporting her and letting her deal with it in her own way even when that's just literally digging a hole
This was so wholesome to watch even with the sombre undertones. I want to face the bad things with the person I love and still be able to make plans for the future 😭❤️
I always get blue and lost in September even before my brain registers that's the time of year when I lost him. It's like a date stamped emotional storm. I'm learning to accept it, let the wave of grief and 'wrongness' break and eventually the sun starts shining again. A big hug to Claudia.
I would highly recommend the book "Unlearn Your Pain". It's a book that helps deal with the emotions and trauma that come with chronic pain and it helps you reprogram how you think of your pain so that it isn't as traumatic when you're sick or in a ton of pain. I have chronic pain from multiple sources and it has literally changed my existence to one of much more peace and happiness. Also, it's extremely science based, backed by science and not hokey "drink my potion and feel better but this will actually kill you" type thing.
I may check that out. I suffer from a chronic pain issue that used to really get me down. But I found a lot more peace in my condition when I just sort of... accepted it? Stopped trying to fight it, and just let myself have the time I need to recover from a flare up. I think a lot of it was to do with guilt and frustration for the things that I couldn't do with and for people, and the things I'd miss out on. Once I accepted that it wasn't my fault, I found myself living more peacefully with it, with less negativity associated. Funnily enough, that positivity has actually lessened my symptoms too!
@@arania.exumai This book actually helps rewire the brain's opinion on pain and it's brilliant. It really does help a TON. It's science based, not some hokey "drink my potion and feel better but it's gonna actually kill you" type book. I find the science behind it fascinating and keep reading it just to try to absorb as much information as I can! :D
@@arania.exumai Also, I had the name wrong originally because I am sick and my brainhole isn't working lol. It's Unlearn Your Pain, not Your Pain Unleashed. Haha! Whoops.
❤️❤️❤️ Thank you for sharing your occasional wobbles. They happen to everyone and seeing this really lets us know we all have our days and we aren't alone in that.
Genuinely refreshing to see lovely folks on a not so good day. We’ve all had days like this and it’s so good to see you just deal with it and find your way through. Hope tomorrow you both wake up into a good day ☺️
To Claudia - I think it will be so nice when you're planting everything in the spring and remember turning over the soil and getting through a difficult time and remembering your mother and getting to watch that turn into a beautiful garden. im sure it will be lovely
I'm sorry to hear that Claudia is having a rough day. Grief and the anniversary of it is rough. Our little household had a tough day (few days) as well, so we're feeling you too. I'm also glad to hear she got some garden therapy to help herself feel better. Sending some love "across the pond" to your both. Cheers! Leigh-Anne & Liz
Being a gardener for a living I can confirm digging is great for sorting out moods and having thinking time. Clay soils hold a load of nutrients so the main thing needed is to improve the drainage with digging or ‘turning’ in lots of organic matter.
Claudia is out here being at peace with living her best life and I am here for it. Also, watching Jessica trying to hold the smile when the tears are trying to come out was like looking in a mirror
Grief is weird. 9 months ago my lovely Grandad passed away suddenly and I still have wobbles throughout my life. I know it must be different losing a parent, but hold on to the fond memories you have. These moments are just your loved ones saying "I'm still here in mind." ❤💙 Stormy, bad days are rough, but the rainbows and sun that will eventually fall through will be worth it. You got this ladies. Much love. ❤
I love Claudias acknowledgement of her bad day! I've definitely coming to my place of work and been like "listen. I'm having a crap day." and it just makes things go so much better.
I’m rewatching this a little over a year later and they’re pregnant and living in a bit of a building site 😂. Also I completely understand where Claudia is coming from. I get like that when it’s close to my mom’s birthday or the day she died. Thank y’all for helping me through my grief. Sending y’all lots of love.
I love your sofa, have you considered having it re-upholstered using modern safety standards? Jessica looks so appropriate sitting on it. Claudia, I do the dig a hole thing, too. And pull weeds by hand. And rake leaves, but I put them on the turned earth and stir them in a bit for soil improvement. It really works to get those bad day feelings out of my body. My late fiance's birthday is the day after Christmas. It's already starting to get to me more than a bit, even though she's been gone 8 years now. I'm doing things she would do - giving to charity, supporting friends in need, even talking to her because I can still feel her around me. So today I made a huge dent in organizing my storage space, just so I didn't grump and cry all day. Bless you both, you make my bad days better, even when you are having one yourself.
I completely understand where Claudia is coming from. I lost my father around this time 10 years ago unexpectedly. It's still a struggle, but it is getting easier. And I have come to enjoy the Christmas season again and recapture the joy I shared with my father. Thank you so much for sharing your stories, thoughts and and feelings. I truly adore you both, Jessica and Claudia. And I am sincerely hoping for your new year goals and dreams to come true. Again, thank you. Take care the two of you. Lovely as always 👍🤟💝
Moments like when your dog comes up to you when you're sad, is why I love my cat Brown paw when I feel horrible and I lay there and don't do anything he comes up to me and I can see that he's concerned, and it makes me feel so much better especially the fact that he can't talk, to ask me any prying questions he just cuddles with me and loves me.
I can relate to what Claudia's going through. My mother died in 2006 and it took me a good 10 years top stop feeling the grief all over again at every holiday. Every year I would hate everything from February (her birthday) through April (death anniversary) through May (Mother's Day). And Christmas was always bittersweet. Only in the last couple of years has time managed to make things better by helping me forget. And I'm kind of the same way with my emotions as Claudia. I have a hard time identifying the root cause, but I try to make sure I'm not taking things out on everyone around me. Solitude helps sometimes, but not too much of it. Thank you guys for pulling back the curtain a bit to let us know that even the best relationships have bad days. Nobody is perfect--although you two come pretty close! Love to you both (and the dogs) and happy Christmas!
This was the most relatable thing I've seen in a long time. And I must compliment you on your choice of garden tools. That's a quality fork. I learnt the hard way - don't cheap out on a garden fork.
Much love to you and Claudia. Thank you for being so honest and real in your videos, and thank you for including us in your life. May tomorrow bring you nothing but joyful tidings.
So happy to hear more about Claudia's inner life in the past few videos. I am grateful that you share how each of you copes with the challenges of your lives as well as how you support and understand one another. Your love and insights give me happiness. ❤️ Happy holidays.
This helps me so so much. I’ve never known anyone else to be so open about struggling and having fragile days around Christmas. I’ve been trying to handle C-PTSD over Christmas since starting trauma therapy for the first time and it’s been so different. Bad days are different and good day are different. It’s just weird overall, everyday is a weird day. Thank you Jessica & Claudia
Aren’t dogs the best for looking after us? I’m struggling at the moment too so I’m going to be talking about that on my channel this week too it’s so important we talk about these feelings we get when chronically sick and fear takes over. Sending so much love to Claudia thank you for being open about how you are feeling grief is definitely a journey with lots of twists and turns. Xxxx
We are all living one day at a time and there are going to be bad days. Your adorable pups are also taking such good care of you, as you two also try to take care of each other. And J, the fear and anxiety about lungs, breathing and anxiety triggers from illness, means you do what you did here--listen to your body’s signals. Rest when you need to, etc. and your little pups are so precious and love you so much-comforting you when you were feeling sad. They are telling you that you are going to be ok. 😘🐾🐾🐾🐾
I do believe it only adds to your channel that you are genuine and honest bad days or good days, shaky footage or spilled tea,, does not matter. I think it shows that you are more than just a person on youtube and encourages others to also do the same and to go through life
I've been watching your vlogmas before going to bed and it's so calming and lovely. I usually have trouble falling asleep but watching your videos make me feel all nice and fuzzy inside ❤ it also makes me want to move back to england again, I miss a good cup of Yorkshire tea!
The loss of a loved one is something that is never forgotten and at this time of year it becomes an even more vivid reminder. Thank you both for sharing. Nothing sugar coated... Just as it is.... I love that you still post, reminds us that we all have crappy days.
Dear Jessica, I was deeply touched by your fear of pneumonia. It is absolutely valid, and pneumonia is dangerous! You mentioned your intercostal muscles. I work as a choir conductor and music teacher, and I know that singing has a number of health benefits, for instance a better immune system and yeah! strengthened intercostal muscles and a better lung capacity in general. Maybe you could try singing three songs a day ... one song at a time.Sad songs, happy songs, doesn't matter, each song counts. If you really "belt out" one of them ( if possible and you don't feel too bad that day), that will be like exercise for your intercostal muscles. Fun fact : I am doing this for over 25 years now, and in my 4 choirs, a lot of singers are 70 and older, but in all those years only one lady suffered from pneumonia, after not being able to sing with us for 3 months in winter because she had a minor stroke and was in hospital. Nobody else (although many have a number of health conditions that would "normally" make them susceptible to pneumonia and the like). Hugs, Lola
Youre picking up on Claudia's grief. Im so sorry for your loss Claudia. Having a cronic illness myself, i detest people telling me to get well soon. I just will send kindness your way. Blessings and joy to you both.
Thank you for being so open and honest. This is utterly wholesome and should be used as a tutorial for how to support your spouse when they're going through a rough patch.
Thank you for your vulnerability and your courage to provide honesty in the face of adversity. Both you and Claud are wonderful examples of perseverance of body and spirit with grace and beauty. It’s hard to remember that dealing with emotions is tough too, with everything else. You are both warriors to me, and I thank you for giving us a glimpse into everything; the good, and the bad.
I'm sorry for Claudia's loss. Anniversaries are hard, and I totally understand turning sadness into angry energy. Digging in the garden sounds like a great way to release the energy and do something productive. Jessica, I hope you stay as healthy as possible this winter. I know you have had 1 cold already, and I hope it's the only one. Good luck for remodels and maybe baby in 2020!
i lost my mom a year ago this past october, a week before her birthday and 5 days before mine. we’re just... all making it through the season at this point i think. i think letting yourself feel it when you need to feel it is important, especially when dealing with the grief of losing a parent young(er than expected).
I wanted to hug you two both through the screen. I definitely get having a illness and know your getting sick and having issues getting the medication you desperately know you need. To prevent things from going down the rails. Also I love the blogs this is the best Christmas spirit.
I'm having a bit of a hard time lately for various reasons (tonight I got quite emotional because I'm missing my Grandma -we were close and she died a little over a year ago-, and also my 19 years old cat who died a few weeks ago...), and I'm sorry you had a bad day, but thank you for being so real and honest, it was very relatable (and quite comforting I have to say) ! I hope tomorrow's a better day for all of us (and I very much concur with the digging holes/gardening to make yourself feel better approach, it's pretty amazing how well it usually works for me ! ) !! xx
Absolutely lovely on many levels. Claudia says the ground is clay-ey... you should dig in the leaf material into the clay which will help break it down and enrich it. Otherwise stack and store the collected leaf and over 3 years it will decompose (a bit like your shed! Ow!) and become great free compost.
I’m currently absolutely exhausted and have stopped at a diner to eat something since I haven’t eaten since yesterday and it’s been well over 24 hours since I slept. I fully understand how feeling bad can exacerbate felling emotionally delicate! Here’s hoping you both have a better day and hugs!
I can recommend the contigo thermo cups for coffee and other hot drinks. Only two parts, lid and mug, not little bits that get lost, unlike most others. Easy to drink from. And - bonus - no spilling when carrying the drink around! No spilling in bed or other places either!
I am a psychologist with depression. There are days I dont want to leave the bed and I feel guilty cuz Nowadays my life is actually great. But that is the thing with mental illness, it is a long struggle. When I have bad days I write to my partner (we dont live together just yet) and ask him to plan something to do together. I dont like to be late for events or cancel meetings, so it helps to have a date or someone to see, it gives me a motive to step out of the house. I dont cry as much as before or have suicidal thoughts but the struggle is still there, and just as hard. Thank You for your videos Jessica, I am learning a lot!!!! 💕 You and Claudia are adorable together.
You two are just the sweetest, and when you started talking about your pregnancy hopes for 2020 I just had to chime in -- this time last year I was a mopey wreck because we hadn't yet managed to get pregnant. On January 4th I had a positive pregnancy test, and this Christmas I have a 3-month-old who is just the most delightful wee thing I have ever known. You will be marvelous parents, and I am hopeful and excited for you to get to meet your own wee one(s)! Happy Vlogmas!
Jessica you don't have be in good spirit everyday that's not why we love you ! Its for your genuine feeling which you share with us, thank you ! My mom being dead for 4 yrs. and holidays still get to me. I just get so angry and sad and then I just start crying ! I think I understand how Claudia is feeling but I know that you do ! You are both lucky to have each other , hold on to that ! ❤
Claudia as a sexy grandpa and Jessica as a pin-up Barbie.. They make a lovely couple because they compliment each other. Sometimes opposites really do get along.because they meet each other where they are instead of trying to change the other one, love you both so much have a great Xmas♥️💋 Don't worry Jessica you'll be okay as long as you have Lemsip💚🎄
Being emotionally vulnerable when ill is the story of my life, I cry every time, to everyone. Grateful for you sharing though, hopefully you can get the pneumonia jab from another doctor!
Honestly, digging a hole is like really healthy coping because you can clear your head and release the physical tension. I hope you're both feeling a bit better tonight
Thank you for being so honest, both of you. Christmas tends to be a tough time of year for me, and I usually try to make it better with xmas music & films & baking, but there are still those bad days. This year has been particularly rough, but your videos, esp the ones with some vulnerability like this help a lot.
I love videos like this because they are real even though everything you put out is real but I think it helps to know even you can't smile every second
I'm still fairly new to this channel, but I remember in past videos it seemed Claudia didn't talk as much or she may have felt a little uncomfortable. Now she seems so much more comfortable and it's a joy to watch you both interact and to witness how much you two lover each other.
I have not laughed at a youtube video for months, thank you both for being so lovely and sharing your silly views on your troubled day, it somehow made me feel really happy!
![All The Weekend Gossip // Vlogmas Day 17 [CC]](/img/n.gif)
"Feeling unwell makes me feel emotionally vulnerable." I needed this. Thank you.
I love that Claudia just dug a hole for her problems I need to try that
Jessica: "Hello!! :)"
Claudia: "-_- *angry digging intensifies*"
Zero from the movie holes
tip: there may be reforestation crews in your area in need of volunteers. You can dig a whole and brighten the community!
I was thinking maybe Claudia wanted to bury someone...
Dana Z that actually sounds like a good idea I’ll check- because honestly our area really needs it right now lol
Its now 2021, Claudia is pregnant and they live in a building site. I love how this video has aged 😍
You’re smashing Vlogmas with a chronic illness and really tough life struggles. Your (and Claudia’s) honesty is very refreshing and I really appreciate you putting yourselves out there. Thank you for being yourselves ❤️
Just so awesome the way it starts out with honesty about how bad the day is for both, and moves through introspection to healing. Like a freakin 3-act play.
I feel so much better. I hope you two do.
My mom died years ago, but still Xmas is hard, because she was all about it.
I feel like Claudia's really on a journey of self reflection at the moment and I'm here for it. It's so refreshing to hear someone talk frankly about their feelings.
The captions called Claudia "Tortilla" and I'm still not over it 😂
There literally the best couple ever, they know each other so well and take such good care of each other , there so kind and gentle with each other I wish I could find a relationship like this .........or a relationship at all😢
Please don't settle for anything, honey! I'm sure there's someone wonderful waiting for you out there, just hold your chin up and respect yourself enough to wait until someone worthy of you appears ❤
Britischen is right, at this point if my future wife doesn't treat me like Jessica and Claud treat each other then I don't want it
Claudia is our favourite grandpa ♥️
My grandfather was a farmer, so seeing Claudia digging a hole did literally remind me of him (utterly adorable). I'm glad she does something constructive to deal with her grief. Working with plants is very therapeutic, too.
Doggos always know when you need them for a cuddle ❤
Aren't they just the best, most intuitive creatures.
Thank you so much for watching! How do you cope with your bad days...? xxx
Sending my love to you we love you and people that love you it is ok to not be 100% I would rather you put your health first then good content.
I just lie in bed, and sing, then decide I'm really bad at singing, so I watch TH-cam and try to make myself happy, and cuddle my dog
I go back and look at the photo's i have taken to help me! Xx
Eveanna Goulding yeh same and people ask why are you in bed my exercise is I am disabled an why sit in a cramped in a wheelchair wen you can be comfortable and not in pain.
I'm 49 and it has been 25 years now. Didn't expect by flicking through dally paper had a moment that had an associated memory of tragedy. Was doing well until. Allowed myself a day on the couch watching screens.
Absolutely couple goals, even on the bad days.
Any baby born into this family will be so very lucky.
Update: yes they will!
This literally made me cry, just for being so relatable.
Right? I love this channel. Makes me feel less alone
When they Claudia said that they are hoping for a baby in 2020 my heart melted!!!!❤
100% how a good relationship should work. ‘What will make you feel better?’
When I realise it's one of those days I stop trying to be productive and think, "What can I do that I would utterly enjoy?" and do whatever the best answer to that is. It's the second day that devastates me.
innocent_fugitive this is an excellent advice, thank you for sharing ❤️❤️❤️
@@yanad6980 Thank you for saying so! Hopefully you won't need it much.
💗
There's an airway clearance system called The Vest that might be helpful for you. It's a vibrating compression vest that helps shake up the lungs. We had one for cystic fibrosis.
Take care. Y'all are wonderful ❤️
Steph LJ My mom, who’s 90, uses that vest twice a day to keep her lungs clear.
@@diannemartino3464 I always love to hear about how it helps others! Hope your mom is well!!
I have cystic fibrosis and use my vest 2-3 times a day. It’s helped me so much. Unfortunately, the NIH in Britain doesn’t believe in it nor will they pay for it. They would rather shove antibiotics at their cf patients rather than give them equipment that will help them in the long run.
I was coming in the comments to suggest this exact thing!
Where can I purchase one of those vests?
I love watching how you support each other. I think the general perception is that the non-disabled partner does all the supporting. It is wonderful to watch it go both ways.
Additionally my darling lesbians this is the part where I remind you that straight couples dont always plan their pregnancies. I have 2 children who are happy accidents. We moved when the first one was 3 weeks old.
Always? My god, half of pregnancies are unplanned. I'd surmise that over half of pregnancies conceived "naturally" are unplanned. I can't name a single planned pregnancy that has ever taken place on the Catholic side of my family.
That's why we have birth control :D 42 yrs and no accidents
@@AutumnMoonlight95 lucky. It doesn't always work that way.
Jennifer Wells I was conceived on birth control! It is rare but it happens. Poor mum had quite the shock
@@AutumnMoonlight95 thats a very ignorant view that you have, and that kind of view is harmful to those who need abortions.
Theres a percentage in all the birth control types, that indicate a a failure which most probably leads to unwanted pregnancies. We are usually harassed for not using it, but most of the abortions that happen aren't form of birth control, but a last resort after birth control fails, rape, and similar.
Oh man when I was 9 years old my great grandmother had a heart attack and everyone panicked and cried, she recovered at that time but while I was too young to fully understand I was old enough to pick things up, so I went to our little garden and dug holes the whole day to plant some flowers it and since then I just have this thing when I'm too stressed or sad that I have to dig holes, so this is very relatable Claudia!
BeeCharmer I like your profile name, it reminds me of the movie/book Fried Green Tomaoes
I understand how Claudia is feeling, especially as of late. I'm approaching my first Christmas without my best friend, who passed away on August 31. Christmas was always a big thing that we've celebrated together since we were eleven, and this is the first time I haven't decorated her tree with her, or exchanged gifts with her. I've felt the same way a lot of mornings these past few months. Lots of love 💕
so sorry for your loss ❤ I hope you can find a little joy this christmas even if she is not there physically
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Decorate a tree in her memory if you feel up to it. It takes a long time to adjust to a new reality after losing someone. It's important to hold onto traditions, especially if it reminds of someone dear, but only when you're ready. And give yourself lots of space to not be okay, the next year or two will be really important in caring for yourself, people often underestimate how much losing someone close will actually affect them.
I lost my best friend suddenly 6 years ago now. Certain times of the year are still incredibly hard. Remember them and be kind to yourself!
She would have wanted you to be happy, to enjoy the sights, sounds and traditions of her big holiday. Going on isn’t leaving her behind. She is an intrinsic part of you. You carry her and all those wonderful memories with you.
Claud wearing her birthday present while digging a hole ❤
Claudia is so adorable “yes i cleaned up leaves with a rake” so precious. Im glad you both have each other to help thru difficult times.💕
The fact that Claudia diped her chocolate in the tea makes me think she'd love Tim Tams
claudia should deffo try a tim tam slam!
IT is so important to acknowledge that it is perfectly alright to not have an amazing day every single day, especially during the holiday season. Of course we always hope to never have a bad day ever, but feeling down for any multitude of reason is perfectly normal. There seems to be so much pressure to "be in the holidy spirit", and I LOVE Christmas, but to be happy 100% of December is too much for everyone.
Hope you and Claud feel better ASAP, but feel free to take time to feel bad for as long as you need!
I absolutely love watching the love between you and your wife. It makes this older CIS white male believe in humanity again. Thank you for your channel.
next time i have a problem im gonna try digging a hole
that sounds pretty stress relieving tbh
Angrily washing dishes always helps me :D
I tend to rage reorganize/clean my room
My sister died on December 23, 2015. I really sympathize with Claudia and how she feels this time of year. It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year. For some people this is the hardest time of the year. I’m glad she has a coping mechanism that works for her.
You’re both adorable and deserve happiness. Much love ❤️
My condolences. That's a really hard thing to deal with. I hope memories and family can comfort you.
I’m just watching this video in August 2020. And I have to say Claudia was wise with her expectations this year - a couch 👌🏻
The “mometer” thing was adorable.
I love how you say "waking up on the wrong side of the bed", in German we say "Getting up on the wrong foot" and it means just the same.
Also I love how you support each other!
I speak both French and German (though whether I speak them well is another matter entirely) and I just realised that I have been using "waking up on the wrong foot" in French for years
In danish we say "getting the wrong leg out of bed" which in hindsight is such a weird saying because you obviously get both legs out when you get up, but oh well!
same saying in the U.S. Oh. Claudia said a funny phrase that is a bit different than what I've ever heard - at 15:54 : "that will come back to eat us in the ass". we say "bite us in the ass". Funny how some sayings are exact all over, but some are changed up a bit. Which is fine. It's fine. lol
All my support to Claudia. I've lost both my parents and understand just how hard it can be. And in case she doesn't say it, THANK YOU for supporting her and letting her deal with it in her own way even when that's just literally digging a hole
I love how you girls are very different but so suited. Kudos to Claudia for her understanding of the therapeutic power of gardening.
This was so wholesome to watch even with the sombre undertones. I want to face the bad things with the person I love and still be able to make plans for the future 😭❤️
Claudia: “Maybe in the new year we should spend some time apart”
2020: “Yeah, no, sorry, that’s not happening.”
It has taken me this long to figure out Lemsip is like American Theraflu (holds hands super far apart)
Emily Rachel Gilley saaaaaaame
I had no idea
Now all I need to know is what Theraflu is... We have neither in Norway.
Theraflu? Never heard of it 😂
Neocitran here in Canada. Lol
I always get blue and lost in September even before my brain registers that's the time of year when I lost him. It's like a date stamped emotional storm. I'm learning to accept it, let the wave of grief and 'wrongness' break and eventually the sun starts shining again. A big hug to Claudia.
If the GP won't give it to you, Boots are providing pneumonia jab I saw the leaflet when I was in their pharmacy yesterday.
I second this - most vaccines can be done privately and they don’t cost much in the U.K.
I would highly recommend the book "Unlearn Your Pain". It's a book that helps deal with the emotions and trauma that come with chronic pain and it helps you reprogram how you think of your pain so that it isn't as traumatic when you're sick or in a ton of pain. I have chronic pain from multiple sources and it has literally changed my existence to one of much more peace and happiness. Also, it's extremely science based, backed by science and not hokey "drink my potion and feel better but this will actually kill you" type thing.
I may check that out. I suffer from a chronic pain issue that used to really get me down. But I found a lot more peace in my condition when I just sort of... accepted it? Stopped trying to fight it, and just let myself have the time I need to recover from a flare up. I think a lot of it was to do with guilt and frustration for the things that I couldn't do with and for people, and the things I'd miss out on. Once I accepted that it wasn't my fault, I found myself living more peacefully with it, with less negativity associated. Funnily enough, that positivity has actually lessened my symptoms too!
@@arania.exumai This book actually helps rewire the brain's opinion on pain and it's brilliant. It really does help a TON. It's science based, not some hokey "drink my potion and feel better but it's gonna actually kill you" type book. I find the science behind it fascinating and keep reading it just to try to absorb as much information as I can! :D
@@arania.exumai Also, I had the name wrong originally because I am sick and my brainhole isn't working lol. It's Unlearn Your Pain, not Your Pain Unleashed. Haha! Whoops.
❤️❤️❤️ Thank you for sharing your occasional wobbles. They happen to everyone and seeing this really lets us know we all have our days and we aren't alone in that.
Genuinely refreshing to see lovely folks on a not so good day. We’ve all had days like this and it’s so good to see you just deal with it and find your way through. Hope tomorrow you both wake up into a good day ☺️
To Claudia - I think it will be so nice when you're planting everything in the spring and remember turning over the soil and getting through a difficult time and remembering your mother and getting to watch that turn into a beautiful garden. im sure it will be lovely
I'm sorry to hear that Claudia is having a rough day. Grief and the anniversary of it is rough. Our little household had a tough day (few days) as well, so we're feeling you too. I'm also glad to hear she got some garden therapy to help herself feel better. Sending some love "across the pond" to your both. Cheers! Leigh-Anne & Liz
Doing things the way we want is a superpower. You both are very evolved that way. yay
when claudia literally dug a hole for her problems i felt that
Claudia trying to name the Kardashians made me laugh a little too much 😂🤣😂🤣
Same here! But by golly do I get it. I have no idea what the Kardashians are doing haha.
I have to say that Claudia is particularly adorable in this video.
Sorry had to laugh when you carried the tea, cause that is so me.
Being a gardener for a living I can confirm digging is great for sorting out moods and having thinking time. Clay soils hold a load of nutrients so the main thing needed is to improve the drainage with digging or ‘turning’ in lots of organic matter.
Claudia is out here being at peace with living her best life and I am here for it.
Also, watching Jessica trying to hold the smile when the tears are trying to come out was like looking in a mirror
Grief is weird. 9 months ago my lovely Grandad passed away suddenly and I still have wobbles throughout my life. I know it must be different losing a parent, but hold on to the fond memories you have. These moments are just your loved ones saying "I'm still here in mind." ❤💙
Stormy, bad days are rough, but the rainbows and sun that will eventually fall through will be worth it. You got this ladies.
Much love. ❤
I love Claudias acknowledgement of her bad day! I've definitely coming to my place of work and been like "listen. I'm having a crap day." and it just makes things go so much better.
I'm so used to bad days I feel more emotionally vulnerable on good days. I don't know what to do when things go right.
I’m rewatching this a little over a year later and they’re pregnant and living in a bit of a building site 😂. Also I completely understand where Claudia is coming from. I get like that when it’s close to my mom’s birthday or the day she died. Thank y’all for helping me through my grief. Sending y’all lots of love.
I’d wish it could always be vlogmas because I feel less alone watching you everyday. I genuinely like you two!
I know those days, and I think having a partner like you two do must be so comforting. I love both of you and your energy
I love your sofa, have you considered having it re-upholstered using modern safety standards? Jessica looks so appropriate sitting on it. Claudia, I do the dig a hole thing, too. And pull weeds by hand. And rake leaves, but I put them on the turned earth and stir them in a bit for soil improvement. It really works to get those bad day feelings out of my body. My late fiance's birthday is the day after Christmas. It's already starting to get to me more than a bit, even though she's been gone 8 years now. I'm doing things she would do - giving to charity, supporting friends in need, even talking to her because I can still feel her around me. So today I made a huge dent in organizing my storage space, just so I didn't grump and cry all day. Bless you both, you make my bad days better, even when you are having one yourself.
Cyn McCollum oh bless you and thank you so much for sharing, made my eyes well up. Sending you lots of love from a stranger ❤️❤️❤️❤️
“I was a bit annoyed that you let me sleep to 9:30 because I’m like, half the day is gone!”
Me, whose official wake-up time is noon: 😐😬
When I first glanced at this I though it said “So we had a baby” 😂
I completely understand where Claudia is coming from. I lost my father around this time 10 years ago unexpectedly. It's still a struggle, but it is getting easier. And I have come to enjoy the Christmas season again and recapture the joy I shared with my father.
Thank you so much for sharing your stories, thoughts and and feelings. I truly adore you both, Jessica and Claudia. And I am sincerely hoping for your new year goals and dreams to come true. Again, thank you. Take care the two of you. Lovely as always 👍🤟💝
Moments like when your dog comes up to you when you're sad, is why I love my cat Brown paw when I feel horrible and I lay there and don't do anything he comes up to me and I can see that he's concerned, and it makes me feel so much better especially the fact that he can't talk, to ask me any prying questions he just cuddles with me and loves me.
I can relate to what Claudia's going through. My mother died in 2006 and it took me a good 10 years top stop feeling the grief all over again at every holiday. Every year I would hate everything from February (her birthday) through April (death anniversary) through May (Mother's Day). And Christmas was always bittersweet. Only in the last couple of years has time managed to make things better by helping me forget. And I'm kind of the same way with my emotions as Claudia. I have a hard time identifying the root cause, but I try to make sure I'm not taking things out on everyone around me. Solitude helps sometimes, but not too much of it.
Thank you guys for pulling back the curtain a bit to let us know that even the best relationships have bad days. Nobody is perfect--although you two come pretty close! Love to you both (and the dogs) and happy Christmas!
“Like just a mermitor” omg you made me laugh on a rough evening 😂❤️
I just love watching your stuff honestly. And it's weirdly nice to see the off days, makes me feel less alone x
This was the most relatable thing I've seen in a long time. And I must compliment you on your choice of garden tools. That's a quality fork. I learnt the hard way - don't cheap out on a garden fork.
Much love to you and Claudia. Thank you for being so honest and real in your videos, and thank you for including us in your life. May tomorrow bring you nothing but joyful tidings.
So happy to hear more about Claudia's inner life in the past few videos. I am grateful that you share how each of you copes with the challenges of your lives as well as how you support and understand one another. Your love and insights give me happiness. ❤️ Happy holidays.
This helps me so so much. I’ve never known anyone else to be so open about struggling and having fragile days around Christmas. I’ve been trying to handle C-PTSD over Christmas since starting trauma therapy for the first time and it’s been so different. Bad days are different and good day are different. It’s just weird overall, everyday is a weird day. Thank you Jessica & Claudia
Aren’t dogs the best for looking after us? I’m struggling at the moment too so I’m going to be talking about that on my channel this week too it’s so important we talk about these feelings we get when chronically sick and fear takes over. Sending so much love to Claudia thank you for being open about how you are feeling grief is definitely a journey with lots of twists and turns. Xxxx
We are all living one day at a time and there are going to be bad days. Your adorable pups are also taking such good care of you, as you two also try to take care of each other. And J, the fear and anxiety about lungs, breathing and anxiety triggers from illness, means you do what you did here--listen to your body’s signals. Rest when you need to, etc. and your little pups are so precious and love you so much-comforting you when you were feeling sad. They are telling you that you are going to be ok. 😘🐾🐾🐾🐾
I do believe it only adds to your channel that you are genuine and honest bad days or good days, shaky footage or spilled tea,, does not matter. I think it shows that you are more than just a person on youtube and encourages others to also do the same and to go through life
I've been watching your vlogmas before going to bed and it's so calming and lovely. I usually have trouble falling asleep but watching your videos make me feel all nice and fuzzy inside ❤ it also makes me want to move back to england again, I miss a good cup of Yorkshire tea!
The loss of a loved one is something that is never forgotten and at this time of year it becomes an even more vivid reminder.
Thank you both for sharing. Nothing sugar coated... Just as it is.... I love that you still post, reminds us that we all have crappy days.
Dear Jessica, I was deeply touched by your fear of pneumonia. It is absolutely valid, and pneumonia is dangerous! You mentioned your intercostal muscles. I work as a choir conductor and music teacher, and I know that singing has a number of health benefits, for instance a better immune system and yeah! strengthened intercostal muscles and a better lung capacity in general. Maybe you could try singing three songs a day ... one song at a time.Sad songs, happy songs, doesn't matter, each song counts. If you really "belt out" one of them ( if possible and you don't feel too bad that day), that will be like exercise for your intercostal muscles. Fun fact : I am doing this for over 25 years now, and in my 4 choirs, a lot of singers are 70 and older, but in all those years only one lady suffered from pneumonia, after not being able to sing with us for 3 months in winter because she had a minor stroke and was in hospital. Nobody else (although many have a number of health conditions that would "normally" make them susceptible to pneumonia and the like). Hugs, Lola
Youre picking up on Claudia's grief.
Im so sorry for your loss Claudia.
Having a cronic illness myself, i detest people telling me to get well soon. I just will send kindness your way. Blessings and joy to you both.
Thank you for being so open and honest. This is utterly wholesome and should be used as a tutorial for how to support your spouse when they're going through a rough patch.
Claudia, you are not alone. I too rage when I sad. Good on yah Jessica for taking it in stride. Hope the foot is okay
I lost my grandma on Christmas Eve and I totally get where she is coming from! She is blessed to have you
Thank you for your vulnerability and your courage to provide honesty in the face of adversity. Both you and Claud are wonderful examples of perseverance of body and spirit with grace and beauty. It’s hard to remember that dealing with emotions is tough too, with everything else. You are both warriors to me, and I thank you for giving us a glimpse into everything; the good, and the bad.
why did I just fall in love with Jessica over a series of videos and her whimsical voice
I'm sorry for Claudia's loss. Anniversaries are hard, and I totally understand turning sadness into angry energy. Digging in the garden sounds like a great way to release the energy and do something productive. Jessica, I hope you stay as healthy as possible this winter. I know you have had 1 cold already, and I hope it's the only one. Good luck for remodels and maybe baby in 2020!
i lost my mom a year ago this past october, a week before her birthday and 5 days before mine. we’re just... all making it through the season at this point i think. i think letting yourself feel it when you need to feel it is important, especially when dealing with the grief of losing a parent young(er than expected).
I wanted to hug you two both through the screen. I definitely get having a illness and know your getting sick and having issues getting the medication you desperately know you need. To prevent things from going down the rails. Also I love the blogs this is the best Christmas spirit.
I'm having a bit of a hard time lately for various reasons (tonight I got quite emotional because I'm missing my Grandma -we were close and she died a little over a year ago-, and also my 19 years old cat who died a few weeks ago...), and I'm sorry you had a bad day, but thank you for being so real and honest, it was very relatable (and quite comforting I have to say) ! I hope tomorrow's a better day for all of us (and I very much concur with the digging holes/gardening to make yourself feel better approach, it's pretty amazing how well it usually works for me ! ) !! xx
I love that when you both had bad day you both coped with it alone and together without going to extreme. It is a good example
Absolutely lovely on many levels.
Claudia says the ground is clay-ey... you should dig in the leaf material into the clay which will help break it down and enrich it. Otherwise stack and store the collected leaf and over 3 years it will decompose (a bit like your shed! Ow!) and become great free compost.
I’m currently absolutely exhausted and have stopped at a diner to eat something since I haven’t eaten since yesterday and it’s been well over 24 hours since I slept. I fully understand how feeling bad can exacerbate felling emotionally delicate! Here’s hoping you both have a better day and hugs!
I can recommend the contigo thermo cups for coffee and other hot drinks. Only two parts, lid and mug, not little bits that get lost, unlike most others. Easy to drink from. And - bonus - no spilling when carrying the drink around! No spilling in bed or other places either!
I am a psychologist with depression. There are days I dont want to leave the bed and I feel guilty cuz Nowadays my life is actually great. But that is the thing with mental illness, it is a long struggle. When I have bad days I write to my partner (we dont live together just yet) and ask him to plan something to do together. I dont like to be late for events or cancel meetings, so it helps to have a date or someone to see, it gives me a motive to step out of the house. I dont cry as much as before or have suicidal thoughts but the struggle is still there, and just as hard.
Thank You for your videos Jessica, I am learning a lot!!!! 💕 You and Claudia are adorable together.
You two are just the sweetest, and when you started talking about your pregnancy hopes for 2020 I just had to chime in -- this time last year I was a mopey wreck because we hadn't yet managed to get pregnant. On January 4th I had a positive pregnancy test, and this Christmas I have a 3-month-old who is just the most delightful wee thing I have ever known. You will be marvelous parents, and I am hopeful and excited for you to get to meet your own wee one(s)! Happy Vlogmas!
Jessica you don't have be in good spirit everyday that's not why we love you ! Its for your genuine feeling which you share with us, thank you ! My mom being dead for 4 yrs. and holidays still get to me. I just get so angry and sad and then I just start crying ! I think I understand how Claudia is feeling but I know that you do ! You are both lucky to have each other , hold on to that ! ❤
Claudia as a sexy grandpa and Jessica as a pin-up Barbie.. They make a lovely couple because they compliment each other. Sometimes opposites really do get along.because they meet each other where they are instead of trying to change the other one, love you both so much have a great Xmas♥️💋 Don't worry Jessica you'll be okay as long as you have Lemsip💚🎄
Being emotionally vulnerable when ill is the story of my life, I cry every time, to everyone. Grateful for you sharing though, hopefully you can get the pneumonia jab from another doctor!
Honestly, digging a hole is like really healthy coping because you can clear your head and release the physical tension.
I hope you're both feeling a bit better tonight
Thank you for being so honest, both of you. Christmas tends to be a tough time of year for me, and I usually try to make it better with xmas music & films & baking, but there are still those bad days. This year has been particularly rough, but your videos, esp the ones with some vulnerability like this help a lot.
I love videos like this because they are real even though everything you put out is real but I think it helps to know even you can't smile every second
I'm still fairly new to this channel, but I remember in past videos it seemed Claudia didn't talk as much or she may have felt a little uncomfortable. Now she seems so much more comfortable and it's a joy to watch you both interact and to witness how much you two lover each other.
I have not laughed at a youtube video for months, thank you both for being so lovely and sharing your silly views on your troubled day, it somehow made me feel really happy!
If I ever open my own bar, I'm calling it Claudia's Therapy Hole.
Jessica's Vlogmas 2019: Sponsored by Lemsip
I thought this same thing watching this video! :)
every time you talk about wanting a baby i get emotional because that's just so amazing for you two, you're going to be amazing parents
It makes me smile every time Claudia diverges.