If my child's teacher ever used the phrase "his disgusting body" about him, especially in front of him, I would have a very hard time not physically harming that teacher. There is absolutely no excuse for that.
Neighbor was too much of a hardheaded herk to be proactive and rip u[ the bamboo on his side and then put down a barrier on his side of the fence. He's his own worst enemy.
I kind of understand the teacher : I mean, I never met somebody that have that much "regular" fart and is that much uncontrollable. It happen to everybody to have sometime more digestive movement. But everyday? Everyday, I would suggest to consult. There might be some issue at play or simple solution to help the situation cause I can guess that for OP too it's not confortable to be a farting machine.
I wish we saw Karen's face when the headmistress made her pay up to op's mom and that she was monitoring her detention slips. I bet she had a surprised Pikachu face and angry that her "power" was taken from her. Pretty sure that's why she didn't let the headmistress know because of that.
Story 5: Technically the angry secretary had "possession" of OP's car without OP's permission which made it stolen. OP could have called the police and had her arrested for GTA.
I would definitely report her to the cops - grand theft auto. Let the B explain herself to an officer. That entitled secretary needs to be fired. Glad she finally was.
So story 3, about farting in class; I had a teacher who didn't try to give detention but would belittle anyone who happened to fart in class. After he picked on a couple of very shy and self conscious kids I knew that revenge was called for. As a farm kid I knew, from experience, that Ammonium Nitrate, a common fertilizer which we had literally tons of, will give anyone who consumes even a very small amount unbelievably, and uncontrollably, bad gas. So I started dropping a few ground up crystals into his coffee, which he drank constantly, every few days. He soon became know as the schools fart king as he would suddenly go off like a fog horn and would have to stand by the open back door with a look of despair. He soon stopped mentions student's farting.
Story 1: that's kind of my policy too: if you throw something at me, if that object hits me, it becomes my property and I can do whatever I want with it. I was at university once, and some bullies decided it'd be funny to throw a pen at me. I picked up the pen, put it back on the floor, put the foot of my chair on top of the pen and dropped my weight on it, completely destroying the pen. I guess it was effective, because after that, no one threw anything at me ever again.
Story 2: Honestly I was expecting either a mirror to shine it back at him or even their own LED light shining at his property. But OP outdid any of us. Poor HOA home…said exactly no one.
Actually, that would have been the easiest solution. It's something I thought of. Or just buying a spotlight of your own and shining it directly into THEIR bedroom. A little taste of their own medicine does wonders.
@@anndownsouth5070 bamboo is notoriously hard to remove, it's a type of grass so if you cut it it grows right back up and it's hard like wood so it's REALLY hard to cut back without hand tools
Me again-this same teacher actually made a student miss the last bus home just because she "said so". The parents of that student managed to get the teacher fired which was a relief to everyone!
Wow, must be easy to fire teachers over there. I guess they are categorized as social workers? Most teachers here are civil servants employed by the state, and that includes certain benefits, like the fact that they can only be fired if they commit a felony.
I had a kid in a senior class yesterday pass gas…and it was silent and deadly and no facial expressions to give away who it was…twice! Did I say anything? No! I just moved away! I’m sure the student was embarrassed and I would never add to that! Anyone who treats students disrespectfully doesn’t deserve to do the job!
And then tell her to fetch cos if she gonna act like a bitch, she gonna get treated like one. (Though rip if that isn’t going to just cause more arguments)
Story 5: Some people are willing to cling on to any straw of power they get, even if it damages them in the process. OP taking advantage of this by draining them of a bit of money was delicious. And the ending, well that's karma for ya
Story 5: There also seems to be the implication that the directors are not willing to stay extra. Apparently, none of them EVER stay beyond 5pm, or they'd have realized that leaving the keys at the desk could be a problem.
If I'm in line at the store and someone with one item asks me nicely if they can go ahead of me, I will say yes every time. If they're entitled then, no
I usually allow people to go in front if they only have a few packages/ items. Big full carts. No they can wait too. But I've also had people see I only had a few items and ask me if I would like to go first. I try to treat folks nicely
Wow, that teacher in #3 is a nightmare. I can't imagine, having IBS, being in that classroom, and the teacher punishing me because of my medical condition. Then again, there have been a few stories here about teacher's messing with various medical devices and conditions (I seem to remember allergy meds/inhaler, diabetes medication and a colostomy bag), so I guess it's not so far-fetched to think of a teacher punishing a student for incessant, uncontrollable farting.
I got demerits once for it in middle school. Wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t make you get your parents to sign the slip. And somehow, even though grandma was a nurse and knows, you know, a bit more than basic biology, it was my fault for now holding it. Like…huh????
Though I am happy to see that the situation was handled justly it doesn't change the fact that the poor kid missed their birthday. Yes it will come back around another year but that specific year that they turned a certain age will never come back around again and they didn't get a chance to celebrate. That is truly a sad thing.
In 2nd grade, I had the worst teacher ever. The bathroom was attached to the classroom. You had to raise your hand to ask to use the bathroom. I raised my hand and called out to the teacher. When she didn't acknowledge me, I just went to the bathroom to avoid peeing my pants. I got yelled at in front of the class that under no circumstances was I to use the bathroom without her permission. I also got recess detention. One day I knew I was going to be sick. Again I raised my hand and called the teacher with no response. I went up to her desk and told her I needed to use the bathroom. Again she ignored me...until I threw up all over her desk. Then she yelled at me for not going straight to the bathroom. Best day ever! Lol
Story 4: three decades ago when I had a drinking problem, I once had the farts after an evening drinking vodka. For dinner I'd had crab legs; the lunch before was bratwurst. I managed to make the garage stink for a full hour even with the garage and back doors open. At a big box store, I released another and my friend commented that it parted the hair of the person walking behind me. I could imagine the newspapers on the following day reporting that 3 people were killed and 100 injured after a gas bomb was released. I've never had gas like that before or since.
In my Airforce days in the late 1970s, I was an avionics tech on T-33A trainer jets. One check I had to do involved crawling up the tailpipe, to install heater probes . I'm a big guy and it was a snug fit. I worked midnight shift, and ate "mid-rats" before working, basically a second breakfast. I ate lots of scrambled eggs and sausage gravy. One night I'm up the tailpipe clipping the heater probes on. Uh oh.... had to fart.... and it was a doozy. I shinnied back out of that stinky pipe double quick, my eyes watering. Hoowee! 😝
Honestly I was thinking mirrors for the second story. There was another story about person putting mirrored film on their windows in a different story. That light would have gotten moved real quick if half the light was reflecting back into the AHs house.
Punished for farting. Sadly I had this happen at my old job twice. A boomer of a supervisor who actually wrote me up for farting in the locker room as I was trying to rush to the bathroom(and my explanation of being sick didn’t sway her) and once for farting while cleaning the plane. Squatting and bending has a tendency to force the gas out because…you know…belly squish? The one who complained on the latter was a bit of a Karen. Complained about the new employee parking area because “I’m a woman! I can’t walk past that small dark spot in case someone is hiding in those trees!!” Karma caught up with her when she got canned for damaging an aircraft. A very minor, easily fixable thing, but one that still forced the cancellation of a flight. Yeah…you don’t force the cancellation of a flight for negligence and keep your job
Everytime I got after school detention I would just walk out regardless of if they tell me I need to be there. As far as I'm concerned, once that bell rings they can't tell me to do anything
I have had multiple teachers threaten to pull me out of classes, only one actually following through, due to hiccups. The claim was always made (in front of the entire class too) that I was doing it for attention. Still grumbling about this many years later. Those three teachers must have a super secret hiccup switch that is being kept from the rest of humanity.
There are some people who just aren't cut out to be teachers. They should find a job in a prison as warders. That's more their style I'd say. Their bullying would be more productive in there.
That Karen teacher clearly has no business in a classroom, especially with those students who are going through that entertaining part of life called puberty. I have worked with all school aged kids from preschool through high school for 26 years. I know full well that these kids are going through changes and their bodies are doing things that they can't control. Bodily functions, body odor, personal hygiene and acne are things that kids struggle with. When I was in middle school, I developed a hernia on my bladder. When I needed to go, I needed to go or else risk having the hernia rupture. I had a teacher that took great pleasure in refusing to let kids take bathroom breaks. One day, I just walked out of class after her refusal. The teacher tried having me suspended from school. When my mom found out what happened, she went full Momma Bear and had the teacher and principal shaking in their boots.
M&M revenge story: Thank you, awesome checkout girl! Bamboo story: Too bad Mr. Bright Security Light didn't check to see how to stop bamboo from spreading. He could have put in his own root barrier if he had caught it in time. Now he just needs to get some PANDAS! Parking entrance story: Talk about power trips. There are very few rules that can't be set aside on occasion when it makes sense to do so. Secretary Karen had obviously never learned that.
Story 2: My husband & I moved into a new place that we absolutely love back in December! My husband works nights & I'm currently between jobs so 1 night around 6pm (being winter it's completely dark out) the people behind us were leaving their car's headlights on (high beams of course) for up to almost an hour most days! This vehicle's lights were so bright they completely lit up my living room & mud room making it difficult to even just sit in our living room! I told my husband about it but since he had never had to deal with it he of course thought I was exaggerating then came the night my husband was home & got to experience these headlights & my husband was NOT happy! So he gets online & orders a high intensity searchlight to be put on & aimed at the neighbors car the next time they pulled their crap! It took 4 times before these idiots learned how to shut their lights off when pulling into their driveway! We still don't know why they were blinding us with their headlights & we honestly don't care why we only care that they finally stop their bs!
Story 5 - OP should have immediately called the police on that secretary when she refused to give OP their keys back. That is called theft. OP should have also done it while standing right in front of the secretary and refused to move. That secretary had no power to write her up either, because that is a matter for her direct manager and HR.
One of the oldest recorded jokes in history is fr4om ancient Rome... and is a fart joke. More or less translated to for the first time since time immemorial did a woman sit on her husband's lap and did not fart.
I never understand the Karens like in story #1. I remember when I once had to grab some bin bags from a shop and the couple in front of me at the till had a trolley full of stuff yet at no point did I ever feel the need to say can I go first (I'm patient, perhaps too much lol) but instead turned, realised what I had and let me go ahead (with me just profusely saying thank you over and over). Good people will do good turns but if you act like you're owed it then you deserve everything coming your way.
The story of the Karen who refused to stand up to OP reminds me of something that happened in middle school. One thing I should note is that I have mild scoliosis and had to wear a back brace that restricted a lot of movement in my body. I was in theater class, and instead of having desks to sit at, we sat at bleachers that had chairs on them. Well, I was sitting next to a girl a grade ahead of me who highly disliked me (still unsure why tbh) and I had to use the restroom. She actually had her feet propped up on the chair ahead of her, and I asked her if she could move her legs. She looked me straight in the eye and coldly said, "No." I asked again, saying I _really_ needed her to move, she shrugged and said "just go under my legs." Now keep in mind I was wearing a back brace that made crawling nearly impossible, and I told her that I couldnt, and she shrugged again and said "not my problem." So I had to resort to going the other way. I was actually sitting at the farthest left on the top bleacher, and right beside the bleachers was where students kept their instruments and music stands. So I painstakingly very cautiously made my way down the bleachers, knowing that if I fell, it would be on top of a lot of very expensive musical instruments, and of course, being an uncoordinated middle school child and overall klutz, I fell onto a drum set with the loudest sounding crash. It was mortifying. My teacher rushed to me to check if I was okay, and other being a little bruised and humiliated, I was fine. The drum set, thankfully, was undamaged. I then went to the bathroom and spent the rest of the class on the verge of tears. So yeah, I hecking loved middle school.
Story 3: Excellent petty revenge but on a serious note OP needs to get his stomach and digestive system checked out, if he's having that much gas from eating certain foods(chili and curry), he may have a allergy to one or more of the ingredients.
In 1st/2nd grade I would hold my nose when I sneezed, which caused me to fart. After a sneezing fit of 7-10 in a row, I got kicked out of class, you know ALL of us kids were dying lol
to all those out there that are bat ass crazy about flatulence, everyone does it. and it is a good sign that your colon is working as it should. get a bloody life.
oh man, that fart story reminds me of having hiccups in 4th grade science class, and some asshat classmate was mocking me for it and loudly faking hiccups right after i would hiccup. teacher dragged us both out into the hall and i was like, bruh i just have hiccups and this f-er is mimicking me. luckily the teacher had some sense and told the other kid to f off
*OH MY GOD!!!!* Me and that commenter are on the same page. Listening to it I was thinking the same thing about launching them in any direction saying *"Do something."*
*Third Story:* In the end, after the kid's mom won, she had him tank up on gas-producing foods to make sure he literally tell her the words of the nasty insulting French Guard in *_"Monty Python and the Holy Grail:_* *"I **_FART_** IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION!!!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣*
Dark fluff is right, people can be really nice til you mess with them. I have plenty of people in my family that are like that. My great aunt in El Paso is like that. Family is everything to her be it blood related or not. Now she despises my mom's brother, her nephew and disowned him. My sisters are also sweet and loving til you piss them off and our youngest sister is the violent one but my middle sister ain't far behind if you push her hard enough, same with me. My family is know to be really nice and caring but scary as hell if you piss us off.
Like I said in another recent video, you don't own an item from the store until you pay for it. The M&Ms Karen didn't have a leg to stand on. OP bought them. They're his. Way to deal with a pushy line jumper. I like.
OP3: I got detention once in my entire life (and I was framed, 100% seriously), but is it common in places for a kid to get detention without parental notification?
OMG...where to start...I was laughing through most of it. The M&M's I was thinking also of using them as a ball and tossing them...but I like OP's fix better. The airline gas attack...serves that lady right. The bamboo was a nice one...I will have to remember that as far as a fast growing hedge fence. And the last one...LOL...That gals boss was awesome..to her and how he ended up getting revenge for his own ordeal with that guard...I bet she guarded that door better then she was a secretary!!
4:05 I would have installed a mirror to reflect HIS light that was encroaching on your property. Direct the mirror to shine the glorious light into a window (Master Bedroom, if available). Problem solved. If the home owner or HOA complained, you were just making sure that his light was illuminating HIS property and not being wasted. He should thank you.
I doubt OP would have allowed Karen to go before them considering how loud Karen had been shouting into her phone prior to her trying to jump the line... I know I wouldn't... 😄😁😆😅😂🤣
When I taught junior high, kids loved to get fart bombs--some small device that simulated farts pretty well--then they all would complain and demand to be let outside--I calmly said, nope--if I have to smell it, and you all know whose it was, we ALL have to remain in the room to enjoy it! It cut down on those shenanigans!
I would’ve found the brightest spotlight, that you can legally own and pointed directly at that guys house. Find his bedroom and light it up like the Fourth of July on the surface of the sun. And then leave it there that way your house looks dark in comparison.
@DarkFluff: I just listened to an episode from three years ago. The improvement across the board - selection, presentation, commentary - is impressive. Kudos!
😂😂❤😂😂 OMGOSH ❣️ I cannot tell you HOW MUCH I ABSOLUTELY LOVE story #2... EPIC petty revenge!! WTG OP!! WTG!! Also.. the fact the "BAMBOO 🎍 JUNGLE" is STILL there! CHEFS 💋
I love how these Karens say they need to go first because they have somewhere important that they need to be, yet they cause such a disturbance that it wastes way more time than if they would have just waited their turn. I had a guy at my children's School Who Parked his truck and trailer taking up at least 4 to 5 parking spots and the only spot available was between his trailer and another car so I parked there. He immediately came up and without even asking politely just started yelling at me to move my car and that he was going to be late to work and blah blah blah. I told him "well then you shouldn't have parked your trailer where it is taking up all those spaces", and he literally went from 0 to 100 in 2 seconds and rudely said "I had to get my kids to school!", so I looked at him and I said "well I have to get my kids to school too", and he just flipped out even more and kept trying to get others involved who were obviously taking my side and not his cuz he was in the wrong. He even sat against my car door so I couldn't get out to get my kids to school, and kept trying to get my kids to roll down their window, at which point I yelled to him "Don't you dare talk to my kids!!!" He ended up not only verbally assaulting the parents who wouldn't take his side, but also verbally assaulting the children of those parents. He told my 7 year old "shut up you little f#@k!". He also made fun of an astistic child😡 . He went back to his truck when I started calling the police. I thought he was finally giving up so I hung up and proceeded to get my kids out of the car and to school. He aggressively walked up to me, so another parent took him down to the ground so he couldn't hurt my kids or myself. He then fled the scene cuz he knew he screwed up, hitting my car in the process, and took off. He then had the nerve to then call the school and tell the school that he was the victim and that he was the one verbally and physically assaulted. Funny thing is the school had cameras so he did not get away with it. And the police told me that the judge was going to have a Hayday with him lol. The entire experience wasted at least 45 minutes of his time. Had he just let me go drop my kids off and come back, he would have been gone within a couple minutes🤦♀️🙄
"how did my mom finish her petty revenge? by putting my right in the front of the teacher's desk and loaded me up with gas." The fart to the katen in the airplane Ah yes, the "French assault" (according to Monty Python and the Holy Grail).
Story 4: I thought for sure the guy was going to vomit on Karen. I know sometimes some people get really upset stomachs if they drink too much (like me).
Story 2: I was expecting some large, slightly concave, mirrors pointing back exactly at the neighbor's windows. But bamboo is good, and probably less expensive. BTW, there are apparently two general categories of bamboo: I think the kind that doesn't spread quickly (and is recommended for landscaping) is called clumping, but I don't recall the other.
I have some elephant bamboo. It spreads like wildfire. It is BRUTAL to get rid of or keep it contained. It was the 1st thing i thought of when OP went to plant stuff.. Ha!
Story 4 with the fart in the face, back around 10 years ago when I had to get up really early I started saying "waking up at the butt crack of Dawn ain't so bad Unless she's gassy", and I will still say it those rare days I have to be up that early
Glad I never had a teacher like this. I have hereditary flatulence. The body farts as a normal bodily function. Controlling it is as unhealthy as holding in your bladder when you need to pee.
In Primary School (aprox age 8) we had a new teacher who was married to our Deputy Head Teacher Mr Guy. Mrs Guy was awful. Not only did she yell at you when you accidentally knocked a pencil onto the floor, she wouldn't let you go out to break if you yawned as you were bad children for not getting the amount of sleep needed for school the next day! Also at that age I didn't cry much as even when I fell over I would laugh instead. One day I was crying as we came back into the classroom from lunch break (couldn't remember why and this was very rare for me) and my best friend was concerned and immediately told the teacher. Her response to me without knowing anything was "Don't be such a drama queen!". She then proceeded to ignore me. Her only claim to fame at the time was she once taught Wayne Rooney. From what I've heard since is she alledgedly was fired after hitting a student. She was basically the real life Professor Umbridge and I hated that bitch!
Detention Story: I know people say Revenge is best served Cold but OP's Mom proved that wrong... Revenge is best served Stinky... Very, VERY Stinky... 😄😁😆😅😂🤣
sounds amazing. i walked through the bamboo foret in Kyoto last november. it was beautiful and tall. i can only imagine the forest he had that took up his backyard... great airplane revenge, LOL crying my eyes out.
If my child's teacher ever used the phrase "his disgusting body" about him, especially in front of him, I would have a very hard time not physically harming that teacher. There is absolutely no excuse for that.
Yep.... she needed to learn to control her disgusting mind.
...even though, it was true!
I'd report her to the Principal, with the suggestion on not renewing her contract.
💯
ABSOLUTELY!!
I know I WOULD HAVE caught a charge.. FOR SURE!! 🤬🤬
with how narcissistic and entitled and GROSSLY lgbt these teachers have become nowadays my kid is gonna be homeschooled.
Story 2: Looks like the entitled neighbor got bamboozled.
OMG that's so good
I was about to say that!
Bro the pun!!! 🤣
Neighbor was too much of a hardheaded herk to be proactive and rip u[ the bamboo on his side and then put down a barrier on his side of the fence. He's his own worst enemy.
🤣Bamboozled. Love.
French class seems like the appropriate place to learn how to fart in someone's general direction.
I wonder if that teacher’s mother was a hamster and her father smelt of elderberries?
Hahahahahahaahahahahahaha!
I kind of understand the teacher : I mean, I never met somebody that have that much "regular" fart and is that much uncontrollable. It happen to everybody to have sometime more digestive movement. But everyday? Everyday, I would suggest to consult. There might be some issue at play or simple solution to help the situation cause I can guess that for OP too it's not confortable to be a farting machine.
The fifth story reminds me of something a coworker once told me. "You can't be a world class company if you have a preferential parking policy."
That fart in the Karen's face had me hollerin'!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I honestly thought that OP was gonna puke on Karen, not fart on her. But that was awesome!
She so deserved it.
I’m nearing 53yr old so as mature as I’m ever going to be, and that’s exactly what I would’ve done 😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂
I wish we saw Karen's face when the headmistress made her pay up to op's mom and that she was monitoring her detention slips. I bet she had a surprised Pikachu face and angry that her "power" was taken from her. Pretty sure that's why she didn't let the headmistress know because of that.
Story 5: Technically the angry secretary had "possession" of OP's car without OP's permission which made it stolen. OP could have called the police and had her arrested for GTA.
Absolutely, id say i was threatened as well
True or he could get his car back by force like I would
I would definitely report her to the cops - grand theft auto. Let the B explain herself to an officer.
That entitled secretary needs to be fired. Glad she finally was.
I would have done that. and pressed charges and made sure everyone knew.
So story 3, about farting in class; I had a teacher who didn't try to give detention but would belittle anyone who happened to fart in class. After he picked on a couple of very shy and self conscious kids I knew that revenge was called for.
As a farm kid I knew, from experience, that Ammonium Nitrate, a common fertilizer which we had literally tons of, will give anyone who consumes even a very small amount unbelievably, and uncontrollably, bad gas. So I started dropping a few ground up crystals into his coffee, which he drank constantly, every few days.
He soon became know as the schools fart king as he would suddenly go off like a fog horn and would have to stand by the open back door with a look of despair. He soon stopped mentions student's farting.
Brilliant! 👏👏👏
That's awesome
Nothing like a bit of Hauber's finest.
Story 1: that's kind of my policy too: if you throw something at me, if that object hits me, it becomes my property and I can do whatever I want with it.
I was at university once, and some bullies decided it'd be funny to throw a pen at me. I picked up the pen, put it back on the floor, put the foot of my chair on top of the pen and dropped my weight on it, completely destroying the pen. I guess it was effective, because after that, no one threw anything at me ever again.
Story 2: Honestly I was expecting either a mirror to shine it back at him or even their own LED light shining at his property. But OP outdid any of us. Poor HOA home…said exactly no one.
Actually, that would have been the easiest solution. It's something I thought of. Or just buying a spotlight of your own and shining it directly into THEIR bedroom. A little taste of their own medicine does wonders.
Story 2: You can say that the neighbour got... Bamboo-zled by his own stubborness.
And all he had to do was cut back the bamboo on his side of the fence.
@@anndownsouth5070 bamboo is notoriously hard to remove, it's a type of grass so if you cut it it grows right back up and it's hard like wood so it's REALLY hard to cut back without hand tools
Me again-this same teacher actually made a student miss the last bus home just because she "said so". The parents of that student managed to get the teacher fired which was a relief to everyone!
Wow, must be easy to fire teachers over there. I guess they are categorized as social workers?
Most teachers here are civil servants employed by the state, and that includes certain benefits, like the fact that they can only be fired if they commit a felony.
I had a kid in a senior class yesterday pass gas…and it was silent and deadly and no facial expressions to give away who it was…twice! Did I say anything? No! I just moved away! I’m sure the student was embarrassed and I would never add to that! Anyone who treats students disrespectfully doesn’t deserve to do the job!
Story #4: Brilliant! I just went into a major coughing fit from reading about the flatulence of the undead being unleashed.🤣🤣🤣🤣
Story 3. Love that mom. That teacher got what she deserved.
RE: Story 1: Rude Karen tosses a bag of sweets in front of my stuff? Imma yeet that to the other end of the store. Good luck with lunch, KAREN.
And then tell her to fetch cos if she gonna act like a bitch, she gonna get treated like one.
(Though rip if that isn’t going to just cause more arguments)
I geuss that some sweet justice to op.
I'm mean, she'd have been wearing them.
The plane fart.... I can't stop laughing. I 100% approve.
Story 5: Some people are willing to cling on to any straw of power they get, even if it damages them in the process. OP taking advantage of this by draining them of a bit of money was delicious.
And the ending, well that's karma for ya
Hence the saying: Never give keys to someone with a small mind.
Facts if that was me im taking my car back and they wouldn't do a thing about it
Now that's some pro revenge.
Personally I would have gone to the police for theft on that first day
Story 5:
There also seems to be the implication that the directors are not willing to stay extra. Apparently, none of them EVER stay beyond 5pm, or they'd have realized that leaving the keys at the desk could be a problem.
They're on the golf course by 3:00 every day.
If I'm in line at the store and someone with one item asks me nicely if they can go ahead of me, I will say yes every time. If they're entitled then, no
I usually allow people to go in front if they only have a few packages/ items. Big full carts. No they can wait too.
But I've also had people see I only had a few items and ask me if I would like to go first. I try to treat folks nicely
Wow, that teacher in #3 is a nightmare. I can't imagine, having IBS, being in that classroom, and the teacher punishing me because of my medical condition. Then again, there have been a few stories here about teacher's messing with various medical devices and conditions (I seem to remember allergy meds/inhaler, diabetes medication and a colostomy bag), so I guess it's not so far-fetched to think of a teacher punishing a student for incessant, uncontrollable farting.
I remember hearing a story of a teacher who confiscated someone's *INSULIN PUMP* because it looked like a phone.
Story 3: Imagine giving people detention because they passed a bit of gas. Like, that has got to be one of the weirdest cases of abuse of power
Good thing you can always skip detention
I got demerits once for it in middle school. Wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t make you get your parents to sign the slip. And somehow, even though grandma was a nurse and knows, you know, a bit more than basic biology, it was my fault for now holding it. Like…huh????
Though I am happy to see that the situation was handled justly it doesn't change the fact that the poor kid missed their birthday. Yes it will come back around another year but that specific year that they turned a certain age will never come back around again and they didn't get a chance to celebrate. That is truly a sad thing.
In 2nd grade, I had the worst teacher ever. The bathroom was attached to the classroom. You had to raise your hand to ask to use the bathroom. I raised my hand and called out to the teacher. When she didn't acknowledge me, I just went to the bathroom to avoid peeing my pants. I got yelled at in front of the class that under no circumstances was I to use the bathroom without her permission. I also got recess detention. One day I knew I was going to be sick. Again I raised my hand and called the teacher with no response. I went up to her desk and told her I needed to use the bathroom. Again she ignored me...until I threw up all over her desk. Then she yelled at me for not going straight to the bathroom. Best day ever! Lol
@@nancyn6215 that teacher is dumb but I would had skipped recess detention
Story 4: three decades ago when I had a drinking problem, I once had the farts after an evening drinking vodka. For dinner I'd had crab legs; the lunch before was bratwurst. I managed to make the garage stink for a full hour even with the garage and back doors open. At a big box store, I released another and my friend commented that it parted the hair of the person walking behind me. I could imagine the newspapers on the following day reporting that 3 people were killed and 100 injured after a gas bomb was released. I've never had gas like that before or since.
In my Airforce days in the late 1970s, I was an avionics tech on T-33A trainer jets. One check I had to do involved crawling up the tailpipe, to install heater probes . I'm a big guy and it was a snug fit. I worked midnight shift, and ate "mid-rats" before working, basically a second breakfast. I ate lots of scrambled eggs and sausage gravy. One night I'm up the tailpipe clipping the heater probes on. Uh oh.... had to fart.... and it was a doozy. I shinnied back out of that stinky pipe double quick, my eyes watering. Hoowee! 😝
@@lancerevell5979 lucky there was no ignition source nearby. That would have been a truly memorable backfire.
As soon as Karen made the guy walk over her, I yelled "BEER FARTS!" in my car.
Ironic that the teacher managed to be a much bigger fart than anything that ever came out of OP... or from OP in the plane story.
Honestly I was thinking mirrors for the second story. There was another story about person putting mirrored film on their windows in a different story. That light would have gotten moved real quick if half the light was reflecting back into the AHs house.
My thought also. Mirrored film on patio doors are considered energy efficient so many HOAs have rules encouraging.
I was thinking my own spot light aimed at the neighbor's house.
Nah. An art installation of mirrors that reflected the light back at his outse and windows.
Story 3 had me laughing and loving the petty revenge of the mom.
His parents are awesome.
3:06 legend has it that Karen is still there to this day demanding M&Ms
Punished for farting. Sadly I had this happen at my old job twice. A boomer of a supervisor who actually wrote me up for farting in the locker room as I was trying to rush to the bathroom(and my explanation of being sick didn’t sway her) and once for farting while cleaning the plane. Squatting and bending has a tendency to force the gas out because…you know…belly squish? The one who complained on the latter was a bit of a Karen. Complained about the new employee parking area because “I’m a woman! I can’t walk past that small dark spot in case someone is hiding in those trees!!” Karma caught up with her when she got canned for damaging an aircraft. A very minor, easily fixable thing, but one that still forced the cancellation of a flight. Yeah…you don’t force the cancellation of a flight for negligence and keep your job
Everytime I got after school detention I would just walk out regardless of if they tell me I need to be there. As far as I'm concerned, once that bell rings they can't tell me to do anything
I have had multiple teachers threaten to pull me out of classes, only one actually following through, due to hiccups. The claim was always made (in front of the entire class too) that I was doing it for attention. Still grumbling about this many years later. Those three teachers must have a super secret hiccup switch that is being kept from the rest of humanity.
There are some people who just aren't cut out to be teachers. They should find a job in a prison as warders. That's more their style I'd say. Their bullying would be more productive in there.
Oh my goodness Fluff!! You have dealt us a Royal Flush Aces High with this selection!! I was howling with laughter 😂😂😂
That Karen teacher clearly has no business in a classroom, especially with those students who are going through that entertaining part of life called puberty. I have worked with all school aged kids from preschool through high school for 26 years. I know full well that these kids are going through changes and their bodies are doing things that they can't control. Bodily functions, body odor, personal hygiene and acne are things that kids struggle with. When I was in middle school, I developed a hernia on my bladder. When I needed to go, I needed to go or else risk having the hernia rupture. I had a teacher that took great pleasure in refusing to let kids take bathroom breaks. One day, I just walked out of class after her refusal. The teacher tried having me suspended from school. When my mom found out what happened, she went full Momma Bear and had the teacher and principal shaking in their boots.
Most people think they are too mature to laugh at farts. Just stop. Don’t deny it, farts are hilarious. They’re the pinnacle of humor.
I mean, editors USE farting sound effects on videos XD. *insert fart SFX*
I have never found farting funny. For me, it falls in the same category as burps, sneezes, and yawns. Why would it be funny.
@@anndownsouth5070 because it is funny. heck the oldest known joke in the world is a fart joke. written on clay tablets from mesopotamia i think.
@@MindrapeJrthe one with the dog who can't see and opens this one?
@@HappyBeezerStudios no. its older than that one.
M&M revenge story: Thank you, awesome checkout girl!
Bamboo story: Too bad Mr. Bright Security Light didn't check to see how to stop bamboo from spreading. He could have put in his own root barrier if he had caught it in time. Now he just needs to get some PANDAS!
Parking entrance story: Talk about power trips. There are very few rules that can't be set aside on occasion when it makes sense to do so. Secretary Karen had obviously never learned that.
Story 3---Is Beano available in England? "Use Beano and they'll be no gas."
I don't care what anyone says to try to deny it, flatulence is funny! The plane story had me absolutely rolling.
Story 3: wow I would have slapped Mrs F in the face for that comment
Same that and I would had skipped detention
Story 2: My husband & I moved into a new place that we absolutely love back in December! My husband works nights & I'm currently between jobs so 1 night around 6pm (being winter it's completely dark out) the people behind us were leaving their car's headlights on (high beams of course) for up to almost an hour most days! This vehicle's lights were so bright they completely lit up my living room & mud room making it difficult to even just sit in our living room! I told my husband about it but since he had never had to deal with it he of course thought I was exaggerating then came the night my husband was home & got to experience these headlights & my husband was NOT happy! So he gets online & orders a high intensity searchlight to be put on & aimed at the neighbors car the next time they pulled their crap! It took 4 times before these idiots learned how to shut their lights off when pulling into their driveway! We still don't know why they were blinding us with their headlights & we honestly don't care why we only care that they finally stop their bs!
Story 5 - OP should have immediately called the police on that secretary when she refused to give OP their keys back. That is called theft. OP should have also done it while standing right in front of the secretary and refused to move. That secretary had no power to write her up either, because that is a matter for her direct manager and HR.
Farting is an ageless humor
One of the oldest recorded jokes in history is fr4om ancient Rome... and is a fart joke. More or less translated to for the first time since time immemorial did a woman sit on her husband's lap and did not fart.
If a teacher tried to give me detention in high school for farting I would have laughed at them and said no.
Oh I fully celebrated when he ripped one in that karen's face, comedy gold 🤣
I never understand the Karens like in story #1. I remember when I once had to grab some bin bags from a shop and the couple in front of me at the till had a trolley full of stuff yet at no point did I ever feel the need to say can I go first (I'm patient, perhaps too much lol) but instead turned, realised what I had and let me go ahead (with me just profusely saying thank you over and over). Good people will do good turns but if you act like you're owed it then you deserve everything coming your way.
I am addicted to these stories. It confirms my belief on how crazy the world has gotten.
P.S. May god help us all.
The story of the Karen who refused to stand up to OP reminds me of something that happened in middle school. One thing I should note is that I have mild scoliosis and had to wear a back brace that restricted a lot of movement in my body. I was in theater class, and instead of having desks to sit at, we sat at bleachers that had chairs on them. Well, I was sitting next to a girl a grade ahead of me who highly disliked me (still unsure why tbh) and I had to use the restroom. She actually had her feet propped up on the chair ahead of her, and I asked her if she could move her legs. She looked me straight in the eye and coldly said, "No." I asked again, saying I _really_ needed her to move, she shrugged and said "just go under my legs." Now keep in mind I was wearing a back brace that made crawling nearly impossible, and I told her that I couldnt, and she shrugged again and said "not my problem." So I had to resort to going the other way. I was actually sitting at the farthest left on the top bleacher, and right beside the bleachers was where students kept their instruments and music stands. So I painstakingly very cautiously made my way down the bleachers, knowing that if I fell, it would be on top of a lot of very expensive musical instruments, and of course, being an uncoordinated middle school child and overall klutz, I fell onto a drum set with the loudest sounding crash. It was mortifying. My teacher rushed to me to check if I was okay, and other being a little bruised and humiliated, I was fine. The drum set, thankfully, was undamaged. I then went to the bathroom and spent the rest of the class on the verge of tears. So yeah, I hecking loved middle school.
What a witch that girl was! I am glad that you survived middle school. She is probably an unhappy Karen in one of these stories now.
Story 3: Excellent petty revenge but on a serious note OP needs to get his stomach and digestive system checked out, if he's having that much gas from eating certain foods(chili and curry), he may have a allergy to one or more of the ingredients.
I could understand it if OP easts lots of legumes, those tend to give good gas.
story 1 - I'd have said "Thanks, now I know what I almost forgot. Thank you for geting them for me"
In 1st/2nd grade I would hold my nose when I sneezed, which caused me to fart. After a sneezing fit of 7-10 in a row, I got kicked out of class, you know ALL of us kids were dying lol
Story 1: Simple fix! Ask her if she has seen gone with the wind. No matter what she answers, respond with: "Well frankly my dear I don't give a damn."
I about wet myself at my desk over the airplane turbulence! I loved it!!!
Legitimately had a home ec teacher threatening me with detention because of flatulence. She assumed that I was doing it intentionally.
to all those out there that are bat ass crazy about flatulence, everyone does it. and it is a good sign that your colon is working as it should. get a bloody life.
That teacher sounds like a bum I would had told her your not giving me nothing
I sometimes wish I could fart on cue. Could be useful.
So are there people who can fart at will? Its usually my gut that seems to be in control of when they are available.
Oh gosh the revenge on story 3 ... so satisfying. for story 4 Never mess with a person who has gas.
I happened to be eating M&Ms while watching this. I hope Karen still didn't get any.
Story 3: To quote Shrek, "Better out than in!"
oh man, that fart story reminds me of having hiccups in 4th grade science class, and some asshat classmate was mocking me for it and loudly faking hiccups right after i would hiccup. teacher dragged us both out into the hall and i was like, bruh i just have hiccups and this f-er is mimicking me. luckily the teacher had some sense and told the other kid to f off
*OH MY GOD!!!!* Me and that commenter are on the same page. Listening to it I was thinking the same thing about launching them in any direction saying *"Do something."*
*Third Story:* In the end, after the kid's mom won, she had him tank up on gas-producing foods to make sure he literally tell her the words of the nasty insulting French Guard in *_"Monty Python and the Holy Grail:_* *"I **_FART_** IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION!!!" 🤣🤣🤣🤣*
Last story I would have told the secretary to either give me my car or I was calling the cops and charging her with grand theft auto.
Dark fluff is right, people can be really nice til you mess with them. I have plenty of people in my family that are like that. My great aunt in El Paso is like that. Family is everything to her be it blood related or not. Now she despises my mom's brother, her nephew and disowned him. My sisters are also sweet and loving til you piss them off and our youngest sister is the violent one but my middle sister ain't far behind if you push her hard enough, same with me. My family is know to be really nice and caring but scary as hell if you piss us off.
All stories were so so satisfying!!
She got up to let me in 😂
Story 4, Haven't laughed this hard in so long! Thank you for the stomach ache from laughing so much and so long!
I had a 5th grade teacher that would write kids demerits for yawning...yep and she retired after that year too.
Like I said in another recent video, you don't own an item from the store until you pay for it. The M&Ms Karen didn't have a leg to stand on. OP bought them. They're his. Way to deal with a pushy line jumper. I like.
😂😂😂 The airplane story😂😂😂
OP3: I got detention once in my entire life (and I was framed, 100% seriously), but is it common in places for a kid to get detention without parental notification?
OMG...where to start...I was laughing through most of it. The M&M's I was thinking also of using them as a ball and tossing them...but I like OP's fix better. The airline gas attack...serves that lady right. The bamboo was a nice one...I will have to remember that as far as a fast growing hedge fence. And the last one...LOL...That gals boss was awesome..to her and how he ended up getting revenge for his own ordeal with that guard...I bet she guarded that door better then she was a secretary!!
Story 3 I would had skipped every detention and the original poster should had done that
Nuclear fart revenge. Breathe that in karen
Petty revenge is my favorite. So creative.
4:05 I would have installed a mirror to reflect HIS light that was encroaching on your property. Direct the mirror to shine the glorious light into a window (Master Bedroom, if available).
Problem solved. If the home owner or HOA complained, you were just making sure that his light was illuminating HIS property and not being wasted. He should thank you.
That fart bit reminded me of some of Kragle-Tom's stories. That man has rancid gas that could make an entire house uninhabitable for days
Makes my day to see a Dark Fluff post ❤
I feel bad for the other kids in the class. And everyone on the plane. Talk about collateral damage.
I doubt OP would have allowed Karen to go before them considering how loud Karen had been shouting into her phone prior to her trying to jump the line...
I know I wouldn't...
😄😁😆😅😂🤣
When I taught junior high, kids loved to get fart bombs--some small device that simulated farts pretty well--then they all would complain and demand to be let outside--I calmly said, nope--if I have to smell it, and you all know whose it was, we ALL have to remain in the room to enjoy it! It cut down on those shenanigans!
I would’ve found the brightest spotlight, that you can legally own and pointed directly at that guys house. Find his bedroom and light it up like the Fourth of July on the surface of the sun. And then leave it there that way your house looks dark in comparison.
@DarkFluff: I just listened to an episode from three years ago. The improvement across the board - selection, presentation, commentary - is impressive. Kudos!
All of these put a huge grin on my face after a rough day at work!🍻🍻🍻
😂😂❤😂😂
OMGOSH ❣️
I cannot tell you HOW MUCH I ABSOLUTELY LOVE story #2...
EPIC petty revenge!!
WTG OP!! WTG!!
Also.. the fact the "BAMBOO 🎍 JUNGLE" is STILL there!
CHEFS 💋
I love how these Karens say they need to go first because they have somewhere important that they need to be, yet they cause such a disturbance that it wastes way more time than if they would have just waited their turn. I had a guy at my children's School Who Parked his truck and trailer taking up at least 4 to 5 parking spots and the only spot available was between his trailer and another car so I parked there. He immediately came up and without even asking politely just started yelling at me to move my car and that he was going to be late to work and blah blah blah. I told him "well then you shouldn't have parked your trailer where it is taking up all those spaces", and he literally went from 0 to 100 in 2 seconds and rudely said "I had to get my kids to school!", so I looked at him and I said "well I have to get my kids to school too", and he just flipped out even more and kept trying to get others involved who were obviously taking my side and not his cuz he was in the wrong. He even sat against my car door so I couldn't get out to get my kids to school, and kept trying to get my kids to roll down their window, at which point I yelled to him "Don't you dare talk to my kids!!!" He ended up not only verbally assaulting the parents who wouldn't take his side, but also verbally assaulting the children of those parents. He told my 7 year old "shut up you little f#@k!". He also made fun of an astistic child😡 . He went back to his truck when I started calling the police. I thought he was finally giving up so I hung up and proceeded to get my kids out of the car and to school. He aggressively walked up to me, so another parent took him down to the ground so he couldn't hurt my kids or myself. He then fled the scene cuz he knew he screwed up, hitting my car in the process, and took off. He then had the nerve to then call the school and tell the school that he was the victim and that he was the one verbally and physically assaulted. Funny thing is the school had cameras so he did not get away with it. And the police told me that the judge was going to have a Hayday with him lol. The entire experience wasted at least 45 minutes of his time. Had he just let me go drop my kids off and come back, he would have been gone within a couple minutes🤦♀️🙄
"how did my mom finish her petty revenge? by putting my right in the front of the teacher's desk and loaded me up with gas."
The fart to the katen in the airplane
Ah yes, the "French assault" (according to Monty Python and the Holy Grail).
If the kid that kept farting was my child, not only would I make them pay me back for all that trouble, I would take it to the news.
Jesus Christ, please don't broadcast your kid's farts on the news. High school is tough enough already.
Story 4: I thought for sure the guy was going to vomit on Karen. I know sometimes some people get really upset stomachs if they drink too much (like me).
Story 2: I was expecting some large, slightly concave, mirrors pointing back exactly at the neighbor's windows.
But bamboo is good, and probably less expensive.
BTW, there are apparently two general categories of bamboo: I think the kind that doesn't spread quickly (and is recommended for landscaping) is called clumping, but I don't recall the other.
I think Mom needs to make a special meal for here sons class. The more gassy the better.
I have some elephant bamboo. It spreads like wildfire. It is BRUTAL to get rid of or keep it contained. It was the 1st thing i thought of when OP went to plant stuff.. Ha!
I bet that last Karen didn't have a car lol
These are my favorite stories from this channel. And the last one was epic
Story 4 with the fart in the face, back around 10 years ago when I had to get up really early I started saying "waking up at the butt crack of Dawn ain't so bad
Unless she's gassy", and I will still say it those rare days I have to be up that early
Glad I never had a teacher like this. I have hereditary flatulence. The body farts as a normal bodily function. Controlling it is as unhealthy as holding in your bladder when you need to pee.
Make sure you have soup beans for dinner the night before and lunch LOL
In Primary School (aprox age 8) we had a new teacher who was married to our Deputy Head Teacher Mr Guy. Mrs Guy was awful. Not only did she yell at you when you accidentally knocked a pencil onto the floor, she wouldn't let you go out to break if you yawned as you were bad children for not getting the amount of sleep needed for school the next day! Also at that age I didn't cry much as even when I fell over I would laugh instead. One day I was crying as we came back into the classroom from lunch break (couldn't remember why and this was very rare for me) and my best friend was concerned and immediately told the teacher. Her response to me without knowing anything was "Don't be such a drama queen!". She then proceeded to ignore me. Her only claim to fame at the time was she once taught Wayne Rooney. From what I've heard since is she alledgedly was fired after hitting a student. She was basically the real life Professor Umbridge and I hated that bitch!
I love petty stories!
Detention Story: I know people say Revenge is best served Cold but OP's Mom proved that wrong...
Revenge is best served Stinky...
Very, VERY Stinky...
😄😁😆😅😂🤣
The only time I was put into the front of a grocery checkout line was when I went into labor in the grocery line.
1st story - yeah right, OPs going to engage the crazy woman in conversation 😂😅
sounds amazing. i walked through the bamboo foret in Kyoto last november. it was beautiful and tall. i can only imagine the forest he had that took up his backyard... great airplane revenge, LOL crying my eyes out.
In Germany its kinda an unspoken rule to letting someone in front of you if they have just a couple of items and you are doing a family shopping
I just checked with Satan, and he said that planting that bamboo is far more evil than even he is capable of.