Main theses: 1. Be less impressed, more involved 2. Let time to be on your side: you live your life - on your schedule not someone else's. 3. Forgive yourself: forgive yourself if your life is not gonna be the perfect way you've dreamed about. 4. Lean back: don't be in a rush. Did I miss something?
My mother taught me never to chase a man! I am 77 years old and divorced once. My second husband and I were married 46 years till he passed from Covid 2 years ago….he was the best! Now I have a couple of gentlemen interested and I prefer to stay single…too old to start again.
I stopped searching, relaxed and got on with my life deciding I was ok and chose to be happy at 47...then one day met my perfect man in a cafe❤ it was natural, easy and turned out our lives had been parallel and synchronistic our entire lives....both travelling and living all over the world but we met when we both returned home at the same time. 5 years later its better than ever together. Trust in yourself and life.😊
The past few months I literally let go like Matthew speaks about “finding someone”. I stopped looking and being obsessed. Focused on my life and literally someone that I connect with on every level walked into my life
@@NordyCane that’s what’s up! I’m working on myself currently so I’m not rushing for anything, but I work yoga into my routine a good amount! great to here that there’s good connection opportunities down that road. Happy for ya Nordy!
As a single, never married woman of 43, I can say I made the exact mistake Matthew M described his friend making: trying to force relationships to work that I probably subconsciously realized would not work. I was just SICK of being single and dating, so I tried to accept things I knew I didn't want to accept about men I dated. Fortunately, none of those relationships worked out, leaving me still available to find the right man -- if he exists. That said, I no longer feel the same desperation to partner up because I'm willing to embrace the "single" label now instead of hatefully and shamefully shunning it and doing everything in my limited power to abandon it. Trying to abandon it left me in an emotionally abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. It wasn't until I saw the expression on one of my closest friend's face that I knew I wasn't crazy and his behavior was unacceptable. Yeah, I'm good being single. It's WAY better than being stuck with a man who sabotages everything for you instead of supporting you. To all my younger friends out there, don't make the same mistakes I did. There are TONS of single people out there. You are NOT alone. Don't rely exclusively on dating apps. Go out and live life. Make new friends. Enjoy life. That's when you attract the most interesting people. I certainly met some great guys in my 30s -- they just weren't for me. But I met them all when I was living life on my terms and loving it. Plus, that inner joy sustains you. It sustained me through that narcissistic relationship and continues to shine. He was never able to break it. And, for the love of God, stop perpetuating cruel dating practices. If someone is kind enough to ask you out that you don't like, politely decline instead of ghosting. Stop sleeping with men right away and take the time to get to know them. Develop friendships to know if you really like them and whether they will become reliable partners. The worthy ones will stick around even if you don't sleep with them right away. The ones who expect it up front aren't going to stick around for long anyway. They're usually in a hurry because they have other options or a wife/fiance/girlfriend at home. Figure out why they're in a rush. But, yeah, slow down, respect yourself, respect others, and enjoy the process. Life is good! Go enjoy it!
I dont agree with that. If you find out for yourself that the meaning of life is love (in all its forms), one component of that is romantic love, and in order to have a sense of completion and to feel honest happiness it is more than a requirement. Yes you can be happy with yourself, but there comes a point where you want (need) to share that with someone. What point is there in happiness if it cant be shared with anyone? Is it really happiness then?
@npanic628 well you do not really have to share your love with exclusively with someone u want romantic. I do think being loved and ability to love (which is more important than being loved imo) is the whole core of the world. But since you dont have any romantic partners doesnt means you wont be able to be complete. You are always complete and by having this mindset of I NEED someone to love romantically has led me into bad times.
@@npanic628 My point isn’t that one does not need romantic love in life… I believe that the opposite is very much true actually. What I mean is that romantic love, isn’t something that one can “find” in somebody else. Love is created. It requires conscious and deliberate effort to form it, together with another person. There is no “soulmate” somewhere out there waiting to be discovered. Love is made, not found. Joy, or happiness if you will, also cannot be found anywhere or in anybody else. Joy can only be created from within. Joy is like an aura that we carry around with us wherever we go. You can feel it right away when a joyful person comes around. Their joy is recognizable and infectious. It comes from within them, it is not a function of whom is around them. It is the opposite! Thus, a person who would leave a romantic partner because they believe that another person will make them happy, is doomed to very soon be unhappy with someone else as well. Until such time as they realize that happiness in a relationship can only be present when both partners enter into the relationship as joyful individuals.
"Less Impressed, More Involved" is such a wonderful 'mantra' this world so desperately needs right now...Sending a warm hug and a sincere thank you to Matthew McConaughey for putting that energy out into the world...
As a woman in my mid 30s, single and ideally wanting a family, this was a timely watch. It reassures my perspective to leave it to God, the universe, etc. because while I would have loved to be married “by now”, I’m not willing to settle for prospectives who barely meet my moral baseline as Matthew M put it. If I’m meant to be a wife and mother, it’ll happen in due time. If not, life will have to trek ahead and I’ll do what I’ve always done when faced with disappointment - make the most of it. I will not attach myself to any single path of an outcome because the reality is that I cannot control it and hence will not force it. Much love and light to me and you (whoever reads this) on our journeys! 💫x
Yes, you’re right. I learned this too. My only advice for younger women being now in my early 40s is to freeze your eggs in your 20s and 30s. This way you have options for later in life. I couldn’t do it because of money and then the pandemic then now it’s less effective. Warm wishes!
Thank you.. As someone who's been married before, and has been through a lot of stuff with recent relationships and disappointments, I needed to see this. I may have put too much weight on "finding my family" that I might need to actually let it go.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙏🏽 which resonates sooo much. I'm 45 years old and also still desiring to be married and having at least one child. This video is just on time for us all through this journey 🙌🏽 🙏🏽 Sending everyone love, strength and warm hugs 🥰. Keep rising and shining always no matter what 💛❤️🔥🌠⭐️
One of the reasons we disregard “red light” or flags or our gut feeling is because we don’t want to judge. That’s a bitter pill. Gut feeling is not judgmental it is a warning.
Another reason that also gets intermingled in the ignoring, is also our Anima/Animus (in Jungian terms). It's the idea of the person we are with which is different from who they actually are. We talk ourselves into ignoring the inconsistencies, thinking they are this wonderful perfect person who we conjured from our subconscious. Projecting the anima/animus is dangerous and we should be paying attention to ourselves and our ways of thinking.
When you are experienced and have your eyes wide open, it's NOT judging. It's called "Using common sense." If you don't do that, then you can find yourself involved with a dangerous partner. 💋❤🔥
I recommend the audiobook of 'Green Lights'. It's narrated by Matthew McConaughey and it's like he's telling you about his life over drinks; part memoir, part life lessons.
From somebody who is reached master level on Audible, I can attest to this. Out of all the books, I’ve ever listen to, it is one of the best, it is one of those books that’s better to listen than to read.
One of the things that made the most impact on me in this conversation was when Matthew McConaughey talked about his dream and him realising that all he needed to do was surrendering. I think that's a powerful thing to do to simply surrender and trust oneself, trust the process, life and natural way of life.
Such a true aspect. You see red lights and you don t run away, you stay thinking it s a red light to fight more, to sacrifice more of yourself...but it never has an happy ending.
When I turned 30 I met a guy I thought was “the One” but after some time there were red flags. I wanted so badly to be married and start a family I ignored them. I told myself if I have to start over it could take years to find the right person and I may miss my chance to become a mother. Fast forward 23 years I had a daughter but I had a very unhappy marriage. It ended in divorce. now I’m 55 and feeling a different kind of pressure to find the relationship I always hoped for because I feel like the best years are behind me. It’s not a good mindset I know!! But hearing Matthew talk about being at peace if it never happens is what I need to find first before the person. Thank you for that.
Totally relate to this situation. Remember you don't have to accept being single until you die. The right partner was meant for you and will find you if you're open to it. 🙏
Thanks for sharing! Same , I married my recent ex-husband in my early 30s. I've never loved anyone in the world as much as I loved him. I over looked ( alcohol) red flags. I'm 55 and divorced.
Glad everyone is loving the conversation I had with Matthew. Thanks for being here and sharing a little of your time with me as always. I hope you’re having a beautiful day and that this video helps you find just a little more peace today. Sending love to everyone. ❤ P.S. For anyone asking, the link to Matthew’s free online event on the 24th of April is www.MHLivin.com
How did you drop back into my feed/life when I needed building up the most 😭❤️ can I join the 30 day community still? I'll just keep going afterwards on my own to make up the time?!
I've been watching Matthew's videos for years, but it wasn't until about 6 months ago that all of those lessons finally hit me. As a 29 year old female that was very on track to commit the same mistake that McCanaughey's friend had made (i.e. rushing to find "the one"), I'm here to be yet another voice to reassure any one who is currently single and in the same place that I was this time last year that letting go works! The minute I "let go" and just focused on my life, what brings me joy, and began coming to terms with the potentiality of being single for a very long time, the doors swung wide open. I had tried letting go in the past, but it wasn't until it was truly embodied in mind and body that I experienced that switch. I met more quality men to date than ever just by happenstance. As a result of staying true to myself and doing away with the scarcity mindset, I'm now in the happiest and healthiest relationship I've ever been in. A lot of dating simply boils down to serendipity, and believe me when I say the more time you spend chasing a "maybe" or trying to force something to work, you're losing the time you would otherwise have to meet the right person. I made this mistake over and over, and can attest that saying "no" now is far better in the medium and long term. The right person will make things feel effortless, and will consistently go above and beyond for you. It's worth mentioning that what helped get me here was a period of celibacy. It's not the right answer for everyone, however it's what worked best for me. I felt a lot of societal pressure to go out and explore my sexuality in my early 20s through promiscuity despite knowing deep down, it just wasn't for me. I didn't succumb to the pressure via my actions, but it definitely altered how I looked at myself and what I prioritized as I was dating. Once I stopped looking down at myself for not wanting to have casual sex and embraced that side of me, vetting men became wildly easier and more enjoyable. I was able to stay clear headed and truly get to know the men I was talking to without letting the flurry of physical chemistry cloud my judgement as it always had in the past. As another commenter said, life is good! Go enjoy it :)
Wow as a 29 year old woman who has just about let go I needed to see this 🎉❤🙏☺️ I’ve completely focused on me in 2023 and I have THRIVED like never before! Dare I say this has been the best year of my life so far. No coincidence. I’m all geared up for this new incoming decade 🎉
I attended this and it was so good. I feel energized. I'm going through a divorce right now. I've been married for 26 years to a covert narcissist and I'm breaking free and am going to live my best life. ❤
I'm in the beginning of this video. Did you ever meet someone with the exact amount of energy and charisma as Matthew? lol my grandfather was an Italian man he had a huuuuge lovability factor, very charismatic and charming and my old best friend had the same amount. I think some people are born that way. It's a God given gift!
I've always had a lot of respect for Matthew McConaughey. He seems like a real genuine person and clearly has a good head on his shoulders and never seems afraid to give his honest opinion on things even if it ruffles the feathers of those in his industry (the Hollywood types that bully others in trying to adopt their own ideals). It's also reassuring to hear that a man that been honored as one of the sexiest men alive still struggled with dating and finding a proper mate. Great conversation. Really enjoyed listening to this.
Been married twice and I can still say (with confidence!) that I haven't met "the one." At 55, I know the likelihood of that happening is slim to none. I really wish I had trusted myself more and had more self confidence to avoid one or both marriages...but hindsight is 20/20. I'm currently stuck in a marriage where I'm incredibly unhappy...and feeling like there's no way out. Fat, old and hopeless is no way to live......
Making peace and acceptance of how things are, where you are and what may be. Absolutely hit me! Walking through that journey now. Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing this conversation!
I make peace with a possibility that i may not "find the dream man and have kids and build a family with him". That may not be a reality. But i realize i don't have to find the dream man and i can still be a mom raising kids and build my own family. Knowing that i have the option and the ability to achieve that really changes me. It allows me to be "gutsy" and walk away from the men who are not fit for me.
To love someone truly only occured when you look at yourself as pure peefection, your anger, your immaturity, your infidelity. To really look at yourself and realise you became all of those dark things in the desperate need to find love. Every human you begin a relationship will only ever hurt you if you haven't loved understood and accepted yourself. Everyone's beautiful
What he said I relate to SO much about how he said when his father passed away everything changed about how he viewed things. My mother passed away a couple of months ago and it turned my world completely upside down. The pain and loss has been so extreme and it's really opened my eyes to much in my life of what needed to be fixed. I've made huge changes and I'm now on the best path I've been in years, so grateful to God for His love, guidance and using the grief to draw me in and open my eyes. I have so much peace now.
I also took from this video that although we need to live in the moment and be “less impressed and more involved” we need to be strategic with our time in order to set ourselves up to be in that head space. To me, this means not wasting time in relationships that we know are going to hit a dead end, and not waiting to do the things we’ve always wanted to out of fear. The world is our oyster but we don’t have forever to do it.
The way he described how the dream came to him gave me chills. Because I was about 38 when I had a dream that came to me like that. You just know it's not from your brain. It's a message from somewhere else. Then I had a message sent to my thoughts the same way at age 41 when I was awake. I had been having to think of leaving a job I truly loved due to back problems. The message was the name of a job title that I had never considered before. The way it came to me was the way he used his hands to describe how it came. From outside of me to into my head. When you know, you know.
Losing my Dad this past January has lit a fire under me to close my business and start living my bucket list. A gift! Loved Greenlights- listened to it twice.
As a now single woman of 46 who has been married briefly twice, I can say I have had a good share of heartbreak. Matt M talks about not getting cynical but staying hopeful or waiting to know that this is the right person. There is no recipe in my experience. True love and "the one" seems to be a rare thing that happens to a few. I have not seen any happily married truly-in-love couples around me personally. It's more of a thing in books and movies. In this aspect art does not imitate but glorifies life or maybe just one small snippet of a phase of life. After the couple gets their happily-ever-after ending together, I would like to see the love story enduring as life's vicissitudes presses on. Yet to see a movie where even that kind of story is glorified.
'I would like to see the love story enduring as life's vicissitudes presses on.' This is so true! Most stories end after they fall in love. They don't even continue into the 'honeymoon phase' - let alone the rest of their lives. Since people don't see it as much in real life, it would be good to have examples of how couples work through the hard times in the stories we watch. Even 'The Notebook', which is supposed to be about a lifelong romance, just shows them falling in love - then skips to showing them still in love at the end of their life. (I didn't really like this one, and thought their relationship was very problematic from the beginning. But, at least the characters acknowledge this themselves. And it is sweet how he's still dedicated to her even though she doesn't remember him most of the time.) In the book, 'The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts' by Gary Chapman, he talks about how people think their marriage will be like a fairytale. They don't realize that relationships naturally transition from being full of excitement at the beginning, to a more steadfast kind of love, and that everyone has rough times to work through. I have seen some shows and movies that depict lasting relationships that deal with struggles, though. • Pixar's 'Up' (the very first part of the movie) • 'This is Us' (Not all the relationships last, but some do, and even the ones that don't show them going through ups & downs.) • 'The Vow' (Kind of, for him) • 'Victoria' (I've only seen the PBS series version. It was great. There are others about Albert & Queen Victoria) • 'All Creatures Great & Small' (also PBS: 2020 & ongoing. It's mostly about the vet practice, but there's a romance, too) • '50 First Dates' (as the name implies, it's mostly about the courtship phase, but it does show a little of their married life at the end) • 'Spanglish' (Sort of. IIRC, this one starts in the middle of a marriage with problems, so it's more of a drama than a 'love story') I think that's part of it - the stories about enduring romances turn into family dramas. Also, it's hard to fit a whole lifetime into a couple hours, so movies usually just cover one or the other. • 'Home Economics' (Another family drama / sit-com - but you can see that the couples are still in love & work to keep their romances going even with life & kids taking most of their time.) Can anybody else think of some good ones?
It's sad that you've never even seen enduring love in real life. I'm sure you're not alone. I guess I'm lucky to know people who really are still in love. Well, not so much luck, as I think it's because most of the people I know are religious, & our church focuses a lot on families & improving relationships. We constantly hear about selfless love, forgiveness, repentance (aka apologizing & fixing mistakes), being kind, helping others, sacrifice, patience, unity, etc. Religion is really about relationships (Love God, & Love Others - the rest of it is how to accomplish those two goals, which brings joy & peace).
Very comforting advice. At 38, I can relate by accepting my life as it is and be at peace (single, no children yet). I must remain positive and open though, to allow the right man to enter my life. Thank you Matthews 😊 x
39, no kids, never married, still believing I'll find love, BUT this time with the right mindset. I try openness, vulnerability and optimism instead of thinking badly of everyone... ("he's just gonna hurt me anyway..." Well, what if not?)
@@MrKrushgutzlol at thinking you have something to add to these two ladies’ knowledge of pregnancy after 35. Go get back to making your woman miserable or chafing yourself.
She never said anything aboot pregnancy. That was really mean spirited, coach. You dont think she is aware of her age and what having progeny now entails? Lol
It's bad enough losing a parent, but when the other one passes and they're both gone, it's a really harsh reminder of our own mortality because when we're kids we think this is always how life is going to be forever.
Looking back my 20s and 30s, I was rushing to relationships and marriage, partly because of the "culture - everybody was doing it, so did I" and partly because I wanted relationships before finding my true self. Then came the divorce and my single years, I realised that there were always lines of followers/ persuers. I calmed down, no rushing this time and enjoyed my single life. Through living on my own for long enough, I learn about my trueself and realise that all my past men were inappriopriate for me at the first time. I did not see it then because I did not know myself then.
Enjoying how down to earth and from the same eye level he is speaking. Not like he's Matthew McConaughey... He's like just the guy we know who had a truck...Impressed and inspired.
Matthew, You did a great job interviewing MM. It was so refreshing that you weren't the typical sycophant because MM is a famous Hollywood actor. You were warm and genuine. And as a result, your brought out the same qualities in MM. Nicely done.
I'm a 27 year old virgin guy and all I've ever desired ever since I was a young boy was to have a wife and kids, the family I never had. I don't believe in "the one" or "soulmates" however I believe relationships take both parties really trying to make it work for it to work in the end. I have given myself a timeline of till the age of 30 to have children, which most likely will never happen. Even though this will most likely never happen, I have made peace that I will never have children of my own and that's totally ok, my life path just doesn't look to be heading the direction I desired it to go. All I can do now is just hope that I die having left the earth a little better than I found it!!!
Thank you to both of you. I've come to realize that I haven't made peace with myself when it comes to accepting the idea that maybe I'm not going to get married and have children and start a family.. and that that's okay, too! Brought tears to my eyes because it's not an easy concept to accept. Something to work on for me for sure. Wow, powerful stuff. Thanks!
I feel your comment. At 48 I start to accept precisely this one bit at a time for month after month. It finally feels ok to be alone, I hope this is not just giving up.
hey Dee, why would you believe that. We get what we believe. So, we should keep up the faith that someone who is the best for me, is coming. Have it rock strong and you will have the person.
Thinking I may never have a family and kids is so hard for me to even contemplate. It's so sad, depressing and lonely to think about. Every time iij try accepting it I feel as though I'm grieving the deaths of actual family members so I give up trying to accept that. What I do is just focus on the moment and hope that one day at 80 I'm not looking back on a long, empty, lonely life.
Matthew is such a gifted storyteller. It is always a pleasure listening to him. One message that really resonates with me is that we should learn from our crisis. What did we do wrong and how can we shift our behavior to get back in line? An insight that we learn from past experiences is much stronger than mere resolutions, Thank you Matthew!
Just in case you're wondering why McC keeps talking about looking for love in the produce section of the supermarket... it's a recommended spot to try and pick up, because people spend more time there, checking the quality of what they're about to buy. I've done it, it works. ☺️
Also, people who take good care of themselves eat more fruit & veggies, so they are in the produce section each time they shop for groceries and stay a few minutes...long enough to have a little chat.😊
Nothing in life is guaranteed. You have to "forgive the possibility that you may not find anyone" as Mathew says because some people just don't. I've been single my entire life, it took me until April of this year to make peace with that. I've never been the same since.
I just listened this right now one year after. Wonderful energy. And yes I’m 40 I being try to found the right person the last five years.. because I would love to have a family. ❤ But probably I have to stop 🛑 to Looking 👀 because every time that doesn’t work 😢I feel so sad and guilty 🤕. So thank you so much!!
Love the fact so many of MH latest vids are titled 'Don't chase!' Obviously MH is reminding us how important it is to not chase, a friendly reminder!! ♡♡ If they show interest then simply show interest in return xx🩷🩷🧚♀️🧚♂️
Reminds me that scene in "My Best Friend's Wedding" when Rupert Everett tells Julia Roberts "Michael is chasing Kimmy and you're chasing Michael but who's chasing you? No one, get it? He wants Kimmy." It sounded harsh but she had to accept that her attempt to break them up for her own selfish reasons was useless 😂 I always think of that when someone says they are romantically pursuing another person. Are they pursuing you back? No? Then move on 😆
I never see me more than who I am because of family lineage, a man, a career, education, possession, my activities/hobbies, friends, and beauty. My sense of self is the base of my confidence. Everything I list above can and will go away but as long as my mind is intact and taking breath, I am home.
The timeline Matthew talks about really resonated with me. Women have timeline pressure because our eggs are on a timeline. I didn't know men also create timeline for themselves.
What I like about McConaughey - aside form his movies - is that he is unapologetically comfortable and embodied in his masculine energy. Prehaps I'm old fashioned but I like men being masculine & women being feminine & recognizing the strength in both positions.
I loved this so much! Everything he said, tell me I am doing the right thing. That’s exactly we’re I am right now. I am loving and happy with myself! I had stopped looking around and then like magical! He appeared! And we are talking and getting to know each other! He speak with Gods language, and so I do! Before loving anybody is God and myself! Sending many blessings to all of you!
"I forgave the possibility of that not being the outcome...". "Forgive your own ideal that there is only one way...". ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ this, and yes, this "forgiveness" is divinely liberating!
“We" attract this "Moment" 🙏🏻phenomenal moment, realistic message for life ahead of us, such a precious moment.. Thank you Matthew Hussey and Matthew McConaughey⭐️👏🙏🏻
An interesting synchronicity… This past week I signed up for both of the Mathews’ retreat and challenges that they had this week. I’m so excited to be part of their inspiration!
So cool to see the two iconic Matthews have dialogue about love! I have followed Matthew H’s advice since he was a lightly known dating coach and he has really helped me during my single times! I met my Man without even trying and have been with him for almost 7years ! It’s wild! Love this guy!
It's been quite a roller coaster ride, but I've grown and learned a lot about myself. The best thing is being able to interact and touch with the fans Human lives... I'm grateful for that. In return i grant you the privilege to view this channel biography and to follow the instructions for further communication with me. I wish you a nice day.
I admire Matthew McConaughey as an actor and as a person (well, at least those traits that he demonstrates during his interviews or in books); Thank you for this fruitful conversation. I enjoyed every piece of it☺
24:20 What’s frustrating as a single woman when I say “I’m taking time off of the dating sites, if I meet someone great, if not that’s ok too but the sites aren’t healthy for me” and really mean it -the response from well meaning folks is always nudge, nudge ‘that’s when you’ll meet someone’. Which puts me right back. How can you really let go of the goal if you’re hoping that you’ll get it by letting go?
There’s just something I love about Matthew McCounaghey, his vibe even while acting has always been so attractive, not just the character he’s playing but himself I can see the core right through the acting and now after listening this I finally understand why and I realize I wasn’t in the wrong or just infatuated for how attractive he’s in the outside, he’s really the whole package, that’s the energy I like in a man.
@@mr.t993 😂 well.. good point, but when there’s a mutual attraction is different you both would be there for each other. I believe That mantra is more for people that keep chasing without receiving anything in return or continue in toxic patterns getting back with their exes and chasing people that at the end is not a good match. When you attract and interact with people with your same energy is different 😊 I don’t know if that makes sense 😄
"This neat and tidy way is the only way I can be happy" - that is it right there. That belief system can destroy the possibility of happiness (and growth and truly living life) so quickly! What a great conversation - thank you!
I am a Leo female that is also an ICU Nurse , so I am strong , too strong..and I chased and chased to try and prove that I was worth his effort and time .. but all that did was exhaust me.. “ you can try all you want , but if he’s the wrong guy he will Never appreciate your efforts “ well I don’t chase , I learned to sit back & Cliché yessss I worked on myself 😊❤
Love how MM says his wife probably wouldn’t have been so attracted to him if he hadn’t slowed down and gotten more comfortable where he was vs hunting too hard. I think this is super important for men to hear, especially the ones who claim “nice guys finish last” and think they do all the right things but women don’t like them. Guaranteed, those guys are seeking too hard and that’s the problem. Need to learn to be comfortable in yourself and your position, in order to attract someone else to you.
I’ll be there ! So excited to be apart of this. Thank you Matthew for being someone I continually lean on over and over again through the last couple of years of my life going through one of the most difficult break ups that took me to dark places and crippled me. In the car, doing laundry where ever I had a chance to listen to your voice and advice it literally helped me get through the toughest days. Thank you for being you! ❤
I appreciate the candor & common sense Matthew M. shares in ‘Greenlights.’ My 2 big take aways are to be less impressed with myself while going forward *and* taking time away from the madness of the world to be myself- until I “don’t “neeeed” the ____”. Thanks y’all, for a great interview.
This was a powerful podcast for me. This is exactly what I needed to hear at the moment. Thank you both Mathew. I took the day off for the Art of Living event. I cannot wait to dive in.
Hussey's face cringed me the fk out when he was listening to him with that smile but i loved what McConaughey had to say.A lot of relatable and inlife experiences..
I've been single over 20 years maybe because I missed out on those skills being mentally unwell... But I fell in love completely about 5 years ago completely unreciprocated but it's taken that long to build and subside and let go... I think just maybe we only need to even feel it truly once in one lifetime... In 20 years no one's even held my hand and people laugh but believe me I loved completely ❤
I actually just signed up for a job as a personal trainer not too long ago to be a personal trainer, excited because this had been a passion of mine. I felt because I was so engaged with becoming a trainer I had involuntarily opened my normally quiet, and “introverted” self to others, and attracted people who were willing to get to know me and share my passion. It helped find things out about myself who would normally keep himself reserved and busy. So it’s a good experiment for anyone to try!
You guys have had this conversation at such a good point in your lives, where you’ve learnt from past experiences but have a youthful hunger for growth. Thanks for sharing
I am going to keep coming back to this. It's exactly what I need to hear and yes such a pressure valve release! Thank you to both Matthews. I very much believe that it's better to let life flow rather than resist what is, but I'll need to keep forgiving the part of myself that finds it hard to let go of the control.
Basically...accept the very real possibility that you will die alone and it wont matter if you're with someone or not. Just be ok with yourself and your path. Do what you do and maybe someone will come along who likes what you're about. If not..whatever..because it's not like relationships are the be all end all. Just because you want something doesnt mean it's meant for you. Essentially...dont attach yourself to your desires or expectations. Oh..and while you're doing all that...dont be bitter because then you're automatically unattractive and you're really not surrendering to life. Focus on yourself and stop comparing your situation to everyone else.
The one thing I wish either Matthew would have touched on is the elephant in the room...ageism in dating, especially in California. Matthew McConaughey is 12 years older than his wife. We can paint this Disney picture of finding a mate all we want but the reality is for women, it gets harder once you turn 30.
I'm 46 and no problem dating, and I know plenty of other older women friends who found someone over 45+ in fact strangely I think it's easier as you get older as people aren't so picky and settle for great personality with an attraction that's not so superficial.
@@charlottebruce979 Dating is like leasing a car. How many women in their 40s are marrying men in their 40s, especially in states like California, New York, etc
I used to think this way. Especially in university, I was in the mindset of: I need to find someone. I was interested in someone but a year or so down the road, I saw she wasn’t interested at all. That was the moment for me. Where I thought I don’t need any one person to feel fulfilled. My brothers found their partners during school and my family were always asking me when I’d find someone. I carried that with me a long time but now, I feel different. I’ve taken some time to work on myself and now I feel I’m in a good spot. I don’t need anyone to make me happy. When it happens, it happens. I’m not looking to rush into things or feel like times running out. It will be great to feel that way about a person, but it hasn’t happened yet, and I’m no longer beating myself up about it.
Thank you for this conversation you had w/ Matthew McConaughey. Altho I have admired his acting for years, I never found him relatable until this conversation. Perhaps it's because we are the same age, I can relate to his perspectives on personal growth & love life in our later years. Thank you!
Main theses:
1. Be less impressed, more involved
2. Let time to be on your side: you live your life - on your schedule not someone else's.
3. Forgive yourself: forgive yourself if your life is not gonna be the perfect way you've dreamed about.
4. Lean back: don't be in a rush.
Did I miss something?
Number 2 is hard in society now days
Love yourself more than the one you are with…
My mother taught me never to chase a man! I am 77 years old and divorced once. My second husband and I were married 46 years till he passed from Covid 2 years ago….he was the best! Now I have a couple of gentlemen interested and I prefer to stay single…too old to start again.
life is not easy its time to let go i have im healing and im worthy of love
@@carolblair2845I don’t think you’re too old but I can see why you might want to stay single
I stopped searching, relaxed and got on with my life deciding I was ok and chose to be happy at 47...then one day met my perfect man in a cafe❤ it was natural, easy and turned out our lives had been parallel and synchronistic our entire lives....both travelling and living all over the world but we met when we both returned home at the same time. 5 years later its better than ever together. Trust in yourself and life.😊
Only women can "just wait around"
Yep. Good things happen naturaly without trying. When you changed and relaxed yourself magic happened. Because you became relatable
Love it! ❤️
Sounds nice
🤍
The past few months I literally let go like Matthew speaks about “finding someone”. I stopped looking and being obsessed. Focused on my life and literally someone that I connect with on every level walked into my life
That’s a fantastic testimony! How’d y’all meet?
@@Pung_Fungler yoga studio 🧘♂️🧘♀️
Wow beautiful 😍
💯
@@NordyCane that’s what’s up! I’m working on myself currently so I’m not rushing for anything, but I work yoga into my routine a good amount! great to here that there’s good connection opportunities down that road. Happy for ya Nordy!
As a single, never married woman of 43, I can say I made the exact mistake Matthew M described his friend making: trying to force relationships to work that I probably subconsciously realized would not work. I was just SICK of being single and dating, so I tried to accept things I knew I didn't want to accept about men I dated. Fortunately, none of those relationships worked out, leaving me still available to find the right man -- if he exists. That said, I no longer feel the same desperation to partner up because I'm willing to embrace the "single" label now instead of hatefully and shamefully shunning it and doing everything in my limited power to abandon it. Trying to abandon it left me in an emotionally abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. It wasn't until I saw the expression on one of my closest friend's face that I knew I wasn't crazy and his behavior was unacceptable. Yeah, I'm good being single. It's WAY better than being stuck with a man who sabotages everything for you instead of supporting you.
To all my younger friends out there, don't make the same mistakes I did. There are TONS of single people out there. You are NOT alone. Don't rely exclusively on dating apps. Go out and live life. Make new friends. Enjoy life. That's when you attract the most interesting people. I certainly met some great guys in my 30s -- they just weren't for me. But I met them all when I was living life on my terms and loving it. Plus, that inner joy sustains you. It sustained me through that narcissistic relationship and continues to shine. He was never able to break it.
And, for the love of God, stop perpetuating cruel dating practices. If someone is kind enough to ask you out that you don't like, politely decline instead of ghosting. Stop sleeping with men right away and take the time to get to know them. Develop friendships to know if you really like them and whether they will become reliable partners. The worthy ones will stick around even if you don't sleep with them right away. The ones who expect it up front aren't going to stick around for long anyway. They're usually in a hurry because they have other options or a wife/fiance/girlfriend at home. Figure out why they're in a rush. But, yeah, slow down, respect yourself, respect others, and enjoy the process. Life is good! Go enjoy it!
Well said
@@sherriflemming3218 Thank you!
There are the window shoppers and intebtial daters. Susan Winters has a podcast on this.
Intentional daters
I'm 51... :/
Happiness has never been something one can find in another person… It comes from within. Realizing THAT is the game changer. Nothing else.
On point
I dont agree with that. If you find out for yourself that the meaning of life is love (in all its forms), one component of that is romantic love, and in order to have a sense of completion and to feel honest happiness it is more than a requirement.
Yes you can be happy with yourself, but there comes a point where you want (need) to share that with someone. What point is there in happiness if it cant be shared with anyone? Is it really happiness then?
@npanic628 well you do not really have to share your love with exclusively with someone u want romantic. I do think being loved and ability to love (which is more important than being loved imo) is the whole core of the world. But since you dont have any romantic partners doesnt means you wont be able to be complete. You are always complete and by having this mindset of I NEED someone to love romantically has led me into bad times.
@@atadeniz18 Also a good point.
@@npanic628 My point isn’t that one does not need romantic love in life… I believe that the opposite is very much true actually.
What I mean is that romantic love, isn’t something that one can “find” in somebody else. Love is created. It requires conscious and deliberate effort to form it, together with another person.
There is no “soulmate” somewhere out there waiting to be discovered. Love is made, not found.
Joy, or happiness if you will, also cannot be found anywhere or in anybody else. Joy can only be created from within. Joy is like an aura that we carry around with us wherever we go. You can feel it right away when a joyful person comes around. Their joy is recognizable and infectious. It comes from within them, it is not a function of whom is around them. It is the opposite!
Thus, a person who would leave a romantic partner because they believe that another person will make them happy, is doomed to very soon be unhappy with someone else as well. Until such time as they realize that happiness in a relationship can only be present when both partners enter into the relationship as joyful individuals.
"Less Impressed, More Involved" is such a wonderful 'mantra' this world so desperately needs right now...Sending a warm hug and a sincere thank you to Matthew McConaughey for putting that energy out into the world...
As a woman in my mid 30s, single and ideally wanting a family, this was a timely watch. It reassures my perspective to leave it to God, the universe, etc. because while I would have loved to be married “by now”, I’m not willing to settle for prospectives who barely meet my moral baseline as Matthew M put it. If I’m meant to be a wife and mother, it’ll happen in due time. If not, life will have to trek ahead and I’ll do what I’ve always done when faced with disappointment - make the most of it. I will not attach myself to any single path of an outcome because the reality is that I cannot control it and hence will not force it. Much love and light to me and you (whoever reads this) on our journeys! 💫x
Yes, you’re right. I learned this too. My only advice for younger women being now in my early 40s is to freeze your eggs in your 20s and 30s. This way you have options for later in life. I couldn’t do it because of money and then the pandemic then now it’s less effective. Warm wishes!
Thank you..
As someone who's been married before, and has been through a lot of stuff with recent relationships and disappointments, I needed to see this. I may have put too much weight on "finding my family" that I might need to actually let it go.
Maybe your standards are unrealistic.
@@cmhardin37
Have thought about that. 👍
Thank you for sharing your thoughts 🙏🏽 which resonates sooo much. I'm 45 years old and also still desiring to be married and having at least one child. This video is just on time for us all through this journey 🙌🏽 🙏🏽 Sending everyone love, strength and warm hugs 🥰. Keep rising and shining always no matter what 💛❤️🔥🌠⭐️
One of the reasons we disregard “red light” or flags or our gut feeling is because we don’t want to judge. That’s a bitter pill. Gut feeling is not judgmental it is a warning.
Another reason that also gets intermingled in the ignoring, is also our Anima/Animus (in Jungian terms). It's the idea of the person we are with which is different from who they actually are. We talk ourselves into ignoring the inconsistencies, thinking they are this wonderful perfect person who we conjured from our subconscious. Projecting the anima/animus is dangerous and we should be paying attention to ourselves and our ways of thinking.
When you are experienced and have your eyes wide open, it's NOT judging. It's called "Using common sense." If you don't do that, then you can find yourself involved with a dangerous partner. 💋❤🔥
I recommend the audiobook of 'Green Lights'. It's narrated by Matthew McConaughey and it's like he's telling you about his life over drinks; part memoir, part life lessons.
From somebody who is reached master level on Audible, I can attest to this. Out of all the books, I’ve ever listen to, it is one of the best, it is one of those books that’s better to listen than to read.
Ah ok. Narrated by Matthew McConaughey. At first I wondered which Matthew, lol
While also selling you a Lincoln car? 😅
Link please
thank you i have been thinking about this book lately
One of the things that made the most impact on me in this conversation was when Matthew McConaughey talked about his dream and him realising that all he needed to do was surrendering. I think that's a powerful thing to do to simply surrender and trust oneself, trust the process, life and natural way of life.
Such a true aspect. You see red lights and you don t run away, you stay thinking it s a red light to fight more, to sacrifice more of yourself...but it never has an happy ending.
"Let the art of what you do be what you love"
When I turned 30 I met a guy I thought was “the One” but after some time there were red flags. I wanted so badly to be married and start a family I ignored them. I told myself if I have to start over it could take years to find the right person and I may miss my chance to become a mother. Fast forward 23 years I had a daughter but I had a very unhappy marriage. It ended in divorce. now I’m 55 and feeling a different kind of pressure to find the relationship I always hoped for because I feel like the best years are behind me. It’s not a good mindset I know!! But hearing Matthew talk about being at peace if it never happens is what I need to find first before the person. Thank you for that.
Totally relate to this situation. Remember you don't have to accept being single until you die. The right partner was meant for you and will find you if you're open to it. 🙏
Thanks for sharing! Same , I married my recent ex-husband in my early 30s. I've never loved anyone in the world as much as I loved him. I over looked ( alcohol) red flags. I'm 55 and divorced.
Glad everyone is loving the conversation I had with Matthew. Thanks for being here and sharing a little of your time with me as always. I hope you’re having a beautiful day and that this video helps you find just a little more peace today. Sending love to everyone. ❤
P.S. For anyone asking, the link to Matthew’s free online event on the 24th of April is www.MHLivin.com
Which matthew now? 😂
I was already signed up but this was a great video too💝🙏
ps: I figured out your theme song & now it’s on my fave list❣️
How did you drop back into my feed/life when I needed building up the most 😭❤️ can I join the 30 day community still? I'll just keep going afterwards on my own to make up the time?!
How can we ask a question or in contact
I Wish Matthews event was on the weekend, I had to work that when he had it 😢
I've been watching Matthew's videos for years, but it wasn't until about 6 months ago that all of those lessons finally hit me. As a 29 year old female that was very on track to commit the same mistake that McCanaughey's friend had made (i.e. rushing to find "the one"), I'm here to be yet another voice to reassure any one who is currently single and in the same place that I was this time last year that letting go works!
The minute I "let go" and just focused on my life, what brings me joy, and began coming to terms with the potentiality of being single for a very long time, the doors swung wide open. I had tried letting go in the past, but it wasn't until it was truly embodied in mind and body that I experienced that switch. I met more quality men to date than ever just by happenstance. As a result of staying true to myself and doing away with the scarcity mindset, I'm now in the happiest and healthiest relationship I've ever been in.
A lot of dating simply boils down to serendipity, and believe me when I say the more time you spend chasing a "maybe" or trying to force something to work, you're losing the time you would otherwise have to meet the right person. I made this mistake over and over, and can attest that saying "no" now is far better in the medium and long term. The right person will make things feel effortless, and will consistently go above and beyond for you.
It's worth mentioning that what helped get me here was a period of celibacy. It's not the right answer for everyone, however it's what worked best for me. I felt a lot of societal pressure to go out and explore my sexuality in my early 20s through promiscuity despite knowing deep down, it just wasn't for me. I didn't succumb to the pressure via my actions, but it definitely altered how I looked at myself and what I prioritized as I was dating. Once I stopped looking down at myself for not wanting to have casual sex and embraced that side of me, vetting men became wildly easier and more enjoyable. I was able to stay clear headed and truly get to know the men I was talking to without letting the flurry of physical chemistry cloud my judgement as it always had in the past.
As another commenter said, life is good! Go enjoy it :)
How do you let go??😢
Thank you so much for this 💛
Wow as a 29 year old woman who has just about let go I needed to see this 🎉❤🙏☺️ I’ve completely focused on me in 2023 and I have THRIVED like never before! Dare I say this has been the best year of my life so far. No coincidence. I’m all geared up for this new incoming decade 🎉
@@annebowles550 meditation
his kids must learn so much from him. what a man. he is so wise.
…..his Wife, too.
✨These 2 Matthews Rock.
I attended this and it was so good. I feel energized. I'm going through a divorce right now. I've been married for 26 years to a covert narcissist and I'm breaking free and am going to live my best life. ❤
Good for you! You will not regret it
How was he acting with you?
For women everybody is a covert narcissist
Don't chase PERIOD. "Chasing" implies someone is trying to evade you. Pursuit is different.
I'm in the beginning of this video. Did you ever meet someone with the exact amount of energy and charisma as Matthew? lol my grandfather was an Italian man he had a huuuuge lovability factor, very charismatic and charming and my old best friend had the same amount. I think some people are born that way. It's a God given gift!
I've always had a lot of respect for Matthew McConaughey. He seems like a real genuine person and clearly has a good head on his shoulders and never seems afraid to give his honest opinion on things even if it ruffles the feathers of those in his industry (the Hollywood types that bully others in trying to adopt their own ideals).
It's also reassuring to hear that a man that been honored as one of the sexiest men alive still struggled with dating and finding a proper mate.
Great conversation. Really enjoyed listening to this.
I was married for 10 years in my 20s, I would love to have a partner but if it doesn’t happen I’m still going to be ok. Amen.
Been married twice and I can still say (with confidence!) that I haven't met "the one." At 55, I know the likelihood of that happening is slim to none. I really wish I had trusted myself more and had more self confidence to avoid one or both marriages...but hindsight is 20/20. I'm currently stuck in a marriage where I'm incredibly unhappy...and feeling like there's no way out. Fat, old and hopeless is no way to live......
Matthew is dead on about parents passing away. It sobers you up. It truly life changing. And dead on about that pedestal stuff too.
Making peace and acceptance of how things are, where you are and what may be. Absolutely hit me! Walking through that journey now. Brought tears to my eyes.
Thank you for sharing this conversation!
I make peace with a possibility that i may not "find the dream man and have kids and build a family with him". That may not be a reality. But i realize i don't have to find the dream man and i can still be a mom raising kids and build my own family. Knowing that i have the option and the ability to achieve that really changes me. It allows me to be "gutsy" and walk away from the men who are not fit for me.
To love someone truly only occured when you look at yourself as pure peefection, your anger, your immaturity, your infidelity. To really look at yourself and realise you became all of those dark things in the desperate need to find love. Every human you begin a relationship will only ever hurt you if you haven't loved understood and accepted yourself. Everyone's beautiful
What he said I relate to SO much about how he said when his father passed away everything changed about how he viewed things. My mother passed away a couple of months ago and it turned my world completely upside down. The pain and loss has been so extreme and it's really opened my eyes to much in my life of what needed to be fixed. I've made huge changes and I'm now on the best path I've been in years, so grateful to God for His love, guidance and using the grief to draw me in and open my eyes. I have so much peace now.
You don't find who you're looking for when you're looking... amazing....
Stop trying so hard. Let it be. If it’s meant to be it’s meant to be. Words I needed to hear.
I also took from this video that although we need to live in the moment and be “less impressed and more involved” we need to be strategic with our time in order to set ourselves up to be in that head space. To me, this means not wasting time in relationships that we know are going to hit a dead end, and not waiting to do the things we’ve always wanted to out of fear. The world is our oyster but we don’t have forever to do it.
Haha I messed up with my ex she’s thinks we are a dead end
The way he described how the dream came to him gave me chills. Because I was about 38 when I had a dream that came to me like that. You just know it's not from your brain. It's a message from somewhere else. Then I had a message sent to my thoughts the same way at age 41 when I was awake. I had been having to think of leaving a job I truly loved due to back problems. The message was the name of a job title that I had never considered before. The way it came to me was the way he used his hands to describe how it came. From outside of me to into my head. When you know, you know.
That’s God
Losing my Dad this past January has lit a fire under me to close my business and start living my bucket list. A gift! Loved Greenlights- listened to it twice.
As a now single woman of 46 who has been married briefly twice, I can say I have had a good share of heartbreak. Matt M talks about not getting cynical but staying hopeful or waiting to know that this is the right person. There is no recipe in my experience. True love and "the one" seems to be a rare thing that happens to a few. I have not seen any happily married truly-in-love couples around me personally. It's more of a thing in books and movies. In this aspect art does not imitate but glorifies life or maybe just one small snippet of a phase of life. After the couple gets their happily-ever-after ending together, I would like to see the love story enduring as life's vicissitudes presses on. Yet to see a movie where even that kind of story is glorified.
I’ve seen it! There’s hope!
'I would like to see the love story enduring as life's vicissitudes presses on.' This is so true! Most stories end after they fall in love. They don't even continue into the 'honeymoon phase' - let alone the rest of their lives.
Since people don't see it as much in real life, it would be good to have examples of how couples work through the hard times in the stories we watch.
Even 'The Notebook', which is supposed to be about a lifelong romance, just shows them falling in love - then skips to showing them still in love at the end of their life. (I didn't really like this one, and thought their relationship was very problematic from the beginning. But, at least the characters acknowledge this themselves. And it is sweet how he's still dedicated to her even though she doesn't remember him most of the time.)
In the book, 'The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts' by Gary Chapman, he talks about how people think their marriage will be like a fairytale. They don't realize that relationships naturally transition from being full of excitement at the beginning, to a more steadfast kind of love, and that everyone has rough times to work through.
I have seen some shows and movies that depict lasting relationships that deal with struggles, though.
• Pixar's 'Up' (the very first part of the movie)
• 'This is Us' (Not all the relationships last, but some do, and even the ones that don't show them going through ups & downs.)
• 'The Vow' (Kind of, for him)
• 'Victoria' (I've only seen the PBS series version. It was great. There are others about Albert & Queen Victoria)
• 'All Creatures Great & Small' (also PBS: 2020 & ongoing. It's mostly about the vet practice, but there's a romance, too)
• '50 First Dates' (as the name implies, it's mostly about the courtship phase, but it does show a little of their married life at the end)
• 'Spanglish' (Sort of. IIRC, this one starts in the middle of a marriage with problems, so it's more of a drama than a 'love story')
I think that's part of it - the stories about enduring romances turn into family dramas. Also, it's hard to fit a whole lifetime into a couple hours, so movies usually just cover one or the other.
• 'Home Economics' (Another family drama / sit-com - but you can see that the couples are still in love & work to keep their romances going even with life & kids taking most of their time.)
Can anybody else think of some good ones?
It's sad that you've never even seen enduring love in real life. I'm sure you're not alone. I guess I'm lucky to know people who really are still in love.
Well, not so much luck, as I think it's because most of the people I know are religious, & our church focuses a lot on families & improving relationships. We constantly hear about selfless love, forgiveness, repentance (aka apologizing & fixing mistakes), being kind, helping others, sacrifice, patience, unity, etc.
Religion is really about relationships (Love God, & Love Others - the rest of it is how to accomplish those two goals, which brings joy & peace).
Very comforting advice. At 38, I can relate by accepting my life as it is and be at peace (single, no children yet). I must remain positive and open though, to allow the right man to enter my life. Thank you Matthews 😊 x
39, no kids, never married, still believing I'll find love, BUT this time with the right mindset. I try openness, vulnerability and optimism instead of thinking badly of everyone... ("he's just gonna hurt me anyway..." Well, what if not?)
Geriatric pregnancy is where you would be if you get pregnant now
@@MrKrushgutzlol at thinking you have something to add to these two ladies’ knowledge of pregnancy after 35. Go get back to making your woman miserable or chafing yourself.
She never said anything aboot pregnancy. That was really mean spirited, coach. You dont think she is aware of her age and what having progeny now entails? Lol
It's bad enough losing a parent, but when the other one passes and they're both gone, it's a really harsh reminder of our own mortality because when we're kids we think this is always how life is going to be forever.
Looking back my 20s and 30s, I was rushing to relationships and marriage, partly because of the "culture - everybody was doing it, so did I" and partly because I wanted relationships before finding my true self. Then came the divorce and my single years, I realised that there were always lines of followers/ persuers. I calmed down, no rushing this time and enjoyed my single life. Through living on my own for long enough, I learn about my trueself and realise that all my past men were inappriopriate for me at the first time. I did not see it then because I did not know myself then.
Enjoying how down to earth and from the same eye level he is speaking. Not like he's Matthew McConaughey... He's like just the guy we know who had a truck...Impressed and inspired.
Matthew, You did a great job interviewing MM. It was so refreshing that you weren't the typical sycophant because MM is a famous Hollywood actor. You were warm and genuine. And as a result, your brought out the same qualities in MM. Nicely done.
Never thought I would cry at a Matthew McConaughey Interview part called "Red Sports Car" but here I am...
Aww..
Idolatry is a killer.
You find peace when you get to a place of accepting your reality.
The truth is this guy has amazing charisma. He's basically created everything out of that.
I am SMILING with the love and peace I feel in my heart listening to the conversation between Matthew H and Matthew Mc. Thank you! 🙏❤️
I'm a 27 year old virgin guy and all I've ever desired ever since I was a young boy was to have a wife and kids, the family I never had.
I don't believe in "the one" or "soulmates" however I believe relationships take both parties really trying to make it work for it to work in the end.
I have given myself a timeline of till the age of 30 to have children, which most likely will never happen. Even though this will most likely never happen, I have made peace that I will never have children of my own and that's totally ok, my life path just doesn't look to be heading the direction I desired it to go.
All I can do now is just hope that I die having left the earth a little better than I found it!!!
We always get the story of the “loser” on high school but rarely of the popular kid, really interesting point of view 👏🏽
17:30 I’m guilty of this. Theres for sure an art of not overlooking or over-pursuing
23:25 LOVE this analogy
Seeing gifts in everything that's happening is my primary focus on recent days. YHVH is Good.
I really like the prospective that Matthew put out. Like the forcing yourself into a relationship to beat a timeline
Thank you to both of you. I've come to realize that I haven't made peace with myself when it comes to accepting the idea that maybe I'm not going to get married and have children and start a family.. and that that's okay, too! Brought tears to my eyes because it's not an easy concept to accept. Something to work on for me for sure. Wow, powerful stuff. Thanks!
I feel your comment. At 48 I start to accept precisely this one bit at a time for month after month. It finally feels ok to be alone, I hope this is not just giving up.
hey Dee, why would you believe that. We get what we believe. So, we should keep up the faith that someone who is the best for me, is coming. Have it rock strong and you will have the person.
Thinking I may never have a family and kids is so hard for me to even contemplate. It's so sad, depressing and lonely to think about. Every time iij try accepting it I feel as though I'm grieving the deaths of actual family members so I give up trying to accept that. What I do is just focus on the moment and hope that one day at 80 I'm not looking back on a long, empty, lonely life.
Rehear this again prrhaps
Matthew is such a gifted storyteller. It is always a pleasure listening to him. One message that really resonates with me is that we should learn from our crisis. What did we do wrong and how can we shift our behavior to get back in line? An insight that we learn from past experiences is much stronger than mere resolutions, Thank you Matthew!
Just in case you're wondering why McC keeps talking about looking for love in the produce section of the supermarket...
it's a recommended spot to try and pick up, because people spend more time there, checking the quality of what they're about to buy.
I've done it, it works. ☺️
Also, people who take good care of themselves eat more fruit & veggies, so they are in the produce section each time they shop for groceries and stay a few minutes...long enough to have a little chat.😊
Nothing in life is guaranteed. You have to "forgive the possibility that you may not find anyone" as Mathew says because some people just don't. I've been single my entire life, it took me until April of this year to make peace with that. I've never been the same since.
If more people in the world went about their lives with these level headed perspectives it would truely be a better place. Awesome interview thanks 👏
I just listened this right now one year after. Wonderful energy. And yes I’m 40 I being try to found the right person the last five years.. because I would love to have a family. ❤
But probably I have to stop 🛑 to Looking 👀 because every time that doesn’t work 😢I feel so sad and guilty 🤕.
So thank you so much!!
Love the fact so many of MH latest vids are titled 'Don't chase!' Obviously MH is reminding us how important it is to not chase, a friendly reminder!! ♡♡ If they show interest then simply show interest in return xx🩷🩷🧚♀️🧚♂️
Reminds me that scene in "My Best Friend's Wedding" when Rupert Everett tells Julia Roberts "Michael is chasing Kimmy and you're chasing Michael but who's chasing you? No one, get it? He wants Kimmy." It sounded harsh but she had to accept that her attempt to break them up for her own selfish reasons was useless 😂 I always think of that when someone says they are romantically pursuing another person. Are they pursuing you back? No? Then move on 😆
I never see me more than who I am because of family lineage, a man, a career, education, possession, my activities/hobbies, friends, and beauty. My sense of self is the base of my confidence. Everything I list above can and will go away but as long as my mind is intact and taking breath, I am home.
The timeline Matthew talks about really resonated with me. Women have timeline pressure because our eggs are on a timeline. I didn't know men also create timeline for themselves.
"Say no to the wrong things to the right things to come"
Went to high school with him, same class in Longview, TX. Cool guy even then.
What I like about McConaughey - aside form his movies - is that he is unapologetically comfortable and embodied in his masculine energy. Prehaps I'm old fashioned but I like men being masculine & women being feminine & recognizing the strength in both positions.
I loved this so much! Everything he said, tell me I am doing the right thing. That’s exactly we’re I am right now. I am loving and happy with myself! I had stopped looking around and then like magical! He appeared! And we are talking and getting to know each other! He speak with Gods language, and so I do! Before loving anybody is God and myself!
Sending many blessings to all of you!
"I forgave the possibility of that not being the outcome...". "Forgive your own ideal that there is only one way...".
❤️ ❤️ ❤️ this, and yes, this "forgiveness" is divinely liberating!
I haven't even finished watching but wanted to comment how much I'm enjoying this candid chat with Matthew M! 😊 It is inspiring.
Matthew is magical... he can somehow understand and clarify Matthew's obscure ideas.
“We" attract this "Moment" 🙏🏻phenomenal moment, realistic message for life ahead of us, such a precious moment.. Thank you Matthew Hussey and Matthew McConaughey⭐️👏🙏🏻
"Less impressed more involved"
Wow, this blew my mind 🤯👌🏼
An interesting synchronicity… This past week I signed up for both of the Mathews’ retreat and challenges that they had this week. I’m so excited to be part of their inspiration!
So cool to see the two iconic Matthews have dialogue about love! I have followed Matthew H’s advice since he was a lightly known dating coach and he has really helped me during my single times! I met my Man without even trying and have been with him for almost 7years ! It’s wild! Love this guy!
It's been quite a roller coaster ride, but I've grown and learned a lot about
myself. The best thing is being able to interact and touch with the fans Human
lives... I'm grateful for that. In return i grant you the privilege to view this channel biography and to follow the instructions for further communication with me. I wish you a nice day.
I admire Matthew McConaughey as an actor and as a person (well, at least those traits that he demonstrates during his interviews or in books); Thank you for this fruitful conversation. I enjoyed every piece of it☺
Very relatable for me right now. Love this heartfelt and heartwarming conversation. Love these two genuine humans
I want to remember and live by every word of this because it is SO true.
24:20 What’s frustrating as a single woman when I say “I’m taking time off of the dating sites, if I meet someone great, if not that’s ok too but the sites aren’t healthy for me” and really mean it -the response from well meaning folks is always nudge, nudge ‘that’s when you’ll meet someone’. Which puts me right back. How can you really let go of the goal if you’re hoping that you’ll get it by letting go?
My most favorite Matthews in the world, in one screen 😍❤❤❤
❤❤❤🎉
There’s just something I love about Matthew McCounaghey, his vibe even while acting has always been so attractive, not just the character he’s playing but himself I can see the core right through the acting and now after listening this I finally understand why and I realize I wasn’t in the wrong or just infatuated for how attractive he’s in the outside, he’s really the whole package, that’s the energy I like in a man.
Repeat with me: I don’t chase I attract ❤️🙌🏽✨ This content always inspire me ❤🙌🏽✨
@@mr.t993 😂 well.. good point, but when there’s a mutual attraction is different you both would be there for each other. I believe That mantra is more for people that keep chasing without receiving anything in return or continue in toxic patterns getting back with their exes and chasing people that at the end is not a good match. When you attract and interact with people with your same energy is different 😊 I don’t know if that makes sense 😄
Good explanation
@@mr.t993but when you do, it will be from a genuine place instead of ego
You’re just lazy and expect everything handed to you
Gen z mantra 😂
Best post ever. I definitely recommend his book. Really good and unlike most celebs he wrote it himself.
Matthew McConaughey is a good dude.
"This neat and tidy way is the only way I can be happy" - that is it right there. That belief system can destroy the possibility of happiness (and growth and truly living life) so quickly! What a great conversation - thank you!
I am a Leo female that is also an ICU Nurse , so I am strong , too strong..and I chased and chased to try and prove that I was worth his effort and time .. but all that did was exhaust me.. “ you can try all you want , but if he’s the wrong guy he will Never appreciate your efforts “ well I don’t chase , I learned to sit back & Cliché yessss I worked on myself 😊❤
Love how MM says his wife probably wouldn’t have been so attracted to him if he hadn’t slowed down and gotten more comfortable where he was vs hunting too hard. I think this is super important for men to hear, especially the ones who claim “nice guys finish last” and think they do all the right things but women don’t like them. Guaranteed, those guys are seeking too hard and that’s the problem. Need to learn to be comfortable in yourself and your position, in order to attract someone else to you.
My two favorite and most genuine Matthews in the whole world ❤
I’ll be there ! So excited to be apart of this. Thank you Matthew for being someone I continually lean on over and over again through the last couple of years of my life going through one of the most difficult break ups that took me to dark places and crippled me. In the car, doing laundry where ever I had a chance to listen to your voice and advice it literally helped me get through the toughest days. Thank you for being you! ❤
I appreciate the candor & common sense Matthew M. shares in ‘Greenlights.’ My 2 big take aways are to be less impressed with myself while going forward *and* taking time away from the madness of the world to be myself- until I “don’t “neeeed” the ____”. Thanks y’all, for a great interview.
This was a powerful podcast for me. This is exactly what I needed to hear at the moment. Thank you both Mathew. I took the day off for the Art of Living event. I cannot wait to dive in.
Listening to my 2 favorite Matthews is great ! So much wisdom... loved Greenlights.
I’m glad my name is Matthew. People call me Matt mostly. But these guys make me grateful to share the name.
Hussey's face cringed me the fk out when he was listening to him with that smile but i loved what McConaughey had to say.A lot of relatable and inlife experiences..
Matthew Hussey I listen to you almost every day….. I Love your dating advice!!!! My dating life is a work in progress for sure ❤️😂
Matt is incredibly engaging, and conveys an enormous amount of experience
I've been single over 20 years maybe because I missed out on those skills being mentally unwell... But I fell in love completely about 5 years ago completely unreciprocated but it's taken that long to build and subside and let go... I think just maybe we only need to even feel it truly once in one lifetime... In 20 years no one's even held my hand and people laugh but believe me I loved completely ❤
No one will love you more than yourself.
I actually just signed up for a job as a personal trainer not too long ago to be a personal trainer, excited because this had been a passion of mine. I felt because I was so engaged with becoming a trainer I had involuntarily opened my normally quiet, and “introverted” self to others, and attracted people who were willing to get to know me and share my passion. It helped find things out about myself who would normally keep himself reserved and busy. So it’s a good experiment for anyone to try!
The timing of this dropping is crazy for me. I’ve been following since 2016! And STILL learning. Thank you so much for this! ❤
"It bothers me more than ypu actually enjoy it" really put things into perspective when asking to make certain changes or adjustments.
I don’t know what Matthew had the biggest smile. I think my baby did. Keep raising the bar 💗
You guys have had this conversation at such a good point in your lives, where you’ve learnt from past experiences but have a youthful hunger for growth. Thanks for sharing
I am going to keep coming back to this. It's exactly what I need to hear and yes such a pressure valve release! Thank you to both Matthews. I very much believe that it's better to let life flow rather than resist what is, but I'll need to keep forgiving the part of myself that finds it hard to let go of the control.
Always the best to keep it real and incredibly honest. Mathew is awesome.
Basically...accept the very real possibility that you will die alone and it wont matter if you're with someone or not. Just be ok with yourself and your path. Do what you do and maybe someone will come along who likes what you're about. If not..whatever..because it's not like relationships are the be all end all. Just because you want something doesnt mean it's meant for you. Essentially...dont attach yourself to your desires or expectations. Oh..and while you're doing all that...dont be bitter because then you're automatically unattractive and you're really not surrendering to life. Focus on yourself and stop comparing your situation to everyone else.
The one thing I wish either Matthew would have touched on is the elephant in the room...ageism in dating, especially in California. Matthew McConaughey is 12 years older than his wife. We can paint this Disney picture of finding a mate all we want but the reality is for women, it gets harder once you turn 30.
Ok but before that age, its laughably easy for women. It balances out I think.
I'm 46 and no problem dating, and I know plenty of other older women friends who found someone over 45+ in fact strangely I think it's easier as you get older as people aren't so picky and settle for great personality with an attraction that's not so superficial.
@@charlottebruce979 Dating is like leasing a car. How many women in their 40s are marrying men in their 40s, especially in states like California, New York, etc
I’m 51 and I have no interest in men my age and older. They’re too OLD. 😅
@@SmithMaximus funny how no one commented, they just want it to keep going lol
I used to think this way. Especially in university, I was in the mindset of: I need to find someone. I was interested in someone but a year or so down the road, I saw she wasn’t interested at all. That was the moment for me. Where I thought I don’t need any one person to feel fulfilled. My brothers found their partners during school and my family were always asking me when I’d find someone. I carried that with me a long time but now, I feel different. I’ve taken some time to work on myself and now I feel I’m in a good spot. I don’t need anyone to make me happy. When it happens, it happens. I’m not looking to rush into things or feel like times running out. It will be great to feel that way about a person, but it hasn’t happened yet, and I’m no longer beating myself up about it.
Thank you for this conversation you had w/ Matthew McConaughey. Altho I have admired his acting for years, I never found him relatable until this conversation. Perhaps it's because we are the same age, I can relate to his perspectives on personal growth & love life in our later years. Thank you!