How Trauma Breaks You Apart (Structural Dissociation)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ก.ย. 2024
- Structural Dissociation: part of Cold Therapy together with other approaches to trauma and retraumatization.
Dissociation: integrative deficit, not defense (child has few active defenses), symptoms (psychoform and somatoform).
Integration and adaptive behavior depend on synthesis (association of all components of experiences and functions into meaningful coherent mental structures both episodically and across time) and realization (analysis and assimilation via personification and presentification - bring past and future to bear on present, mindfulness and reflexivity).
Depersonalization is failure in personification (semantic not episodic memory, see my vid).
Trauma reduces integrative capacity. In premorbid personalities with low integrative capacity, may lead to dissociation.
Action systems (inborn, self-organizing, self-stabilizing, and homeostatic emotional operating systems): 1. Guides daily living and survival of the species 2. Physical defense under threat (4 Fs) 1+2 = social defense against abandonment and rejection (haywire in BPD) and interoreceptive defense against mental content (=defense mechanisms, primitive like splitting or sophisticated like passive-aggression).
Charles Samuel Myers 1940 in acutely traumatized war veterans: AS1 linked to ANP (apparently normal parts) AS2 linked to EP (emotional parts of the personality). Myers called them “personalities”, but today we call them “parts”.
EP contains vivid trauma recall (FLASHBACKS) and vehement negative emotionality (fear, horror, helplessness, anger, guilt, shame - or listless, non-responsive, submissive - or derealized and depersonalized). They are linked to body dysmorphia and separate sense of self.
ANP represses traumatic memories and avoids triggers via amnesia, sensory anesthesia, restricted emotions, numbness, depersonalization.
ANP conditioned to fear EP and reacts to intrusion by altering or lowering consciousness, substance abuse, addictions, compulsions, self-mutilation (to silence inner voice of EP), phobias or mental action, of dissociative parts, attachment and intimacy, attachment loss, normal life and change, evaluative conditioning (associating neutral stimuli with negative or positive outcomes and feelings owing to prior association with negative or positive stimuli), diversion, estrangement.
Individual can have one of each (Primary SD), one ANP and two or more EP (Secondary), or multiple ANP and EP (Tertiary).
Both ANP and EP have rudimentary sense of self (“I”) and exclusive access to some memories (=identity, see my lecture to Rostov students).
Dissociative parts vary in degree of intrusion and avoidance of trauma-related cues, affect regulation, psychological defenses, capacity for insight, response to stimuli, body movements, behaviors, cognitive schemas, attention, attachment styles, sense of self, self-destructiveness, promiscuity, suicidality, flexibility and adaptability in daily life, structural division, autonomy, number, subjective experience, overt manifestations, dissociative symptoms (negative like amnesia, numbness, impaired thinking, loss of skills, needs, wishes, fantasies, loss of motor functions or skills, loss of sensation; or positive when mental content or functions of one part introduce on another part’s - psychotic/schizophrenioa like voices, nonvolitional behaviors, tics, pains; psychoform or somatoform=conversion symptoms).
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As a child you're in survival mode.. you pack it up and put it in a box and make believe it never happened. Then years later it erupts, eats you up and tears you apart. Abusive and cruel parents are spirit breaking, evil monsters ..
Accurate though
Truth
a very appropriate abstract formulation
Agreed. Totally.
I absolutely agree!!
My stepdad abused me for years,something my school teachers could see,knew "instinctively", but back then,nothing was done about it,(nor about his physical violence-also in public/plain view),and my mother turned the blind eye.
Many "parents" should never have put life into this world.
Some notes:
4:18 Recommended reading and intro
7:20, 8:19 Personality
8:45, 10:33, 30:06 Structural dissociation
13:01, 29:28 Integration
20:45 Dissociation vs dissociative process
22:45, 24:15, 25:11 Scepticism on the subject
25:11 Validity of theory - Trauma causing dissociation and link to personality disorders
26:28 Janet on dissociation, 1907- 2 or more systems of ideas or functions that constitute personality - fragmented
27:50 Emotional disregulation
28:48 Mitchell 1922
30:45 Dissociative self states vs intrusion
33:32 Dissociative phenomena and switching states
35:05, 38:14, 39:45 Metaphysical theory of structural dissociation, 2 action systems
39:45 Interoceptive defense
41:58, 42:30 Myers theory 1940 (ANP and EP personality/part fragmentation)
43:21 ANP, EP and action systems
45:53, 46:23, 56:22 EP (Emotional Part) and PTSD/C-PTSD
50:12, 51:11 ANP (Apparently Normal Part)
52:30, 55:00, 55:26 The internal war in the traumatised mind
53:55 "Empaths", emotional disregulation and real empathy
56:22 EP overwhelms ANP, loss of impulse control, switching (overt, collapsed, covert) in narcissistic defenses and personality disorders
58:38 Unified theory of failed trauma management and 'personality disorders' - dissociative switching
1:00:52, 1:03:06, 1:03:49 ⭐ ANP afraid of, and reactive to, the EP
1:04:31 Evaluative Conditioning and constriction - neutral stimuli becoming trauma triggers leading to more and more avoidance
1:09:30, 1:10:20 Variety in dissociative parts
1:10:38 Variety in dissociative symptoms, Negative - amnesia etc
1:11:02 Positive symptoms - psychotic disorder etc
1:11:57 Differentiating diagnoses and intro to integration of parts
1:13:39, 1:14:18 Integration of ANP and EP in trauma treatment (trauma therapy, social support and restorative experiences after trauma)
1:16:42 Dominant ANP delays ptsd symptoms but exhausts the person and inhibits functioning
1:18:07 "Submission" as Freeze-Fawn-Flight
1:19:08 Collapse/mortification, retraumatisation and regression to traumatised child state
1:20:26, 1:23:16 Dissociative diagnoses, OSDD-1 and DID
1:24:51, 1:26:24, 1:27:13, 1:27:55 CPTSD and BPD
1:26:39, 1:28:37 Trauma examples - overt, ambient
1:27:55, 1:28:52 Personality disorders as post traumatic disorders with dissociative states
Thank you for the timestamps 👍
No problem, this is just how I study.
I'm glad the notes have been useful to you though 🙂
Thanks for the summarization..it's a useful tool in terms of disseminating and imparting this invaluable and complicated process of analyzing ones' experience of accepting it..
I'm going to do this too,
I view it as homework study for my councilor, so we can have meaningful, and productive use of our sessions..
Perfect solution for organizing the principle concepts to discuss with others as well.. convenient soundbites, more easily digested in small portions.. excellent
Hugely helpful; thank you...!
Bless you.
You have helped explain things to me that a counselor has not been able to help me with for 4 years. So grateful you. AntiChrist or not haha. :)
Your dry sense of humour never fails to make me laugh, particularly as relief between heavy topics
Dear Sam,
I just wanted to thank you for your brilliant insight and ability to articulate the complex facets of narcissistic abuse.
At the age of 50, I still hear my Mothers voice telling me I am just “playing the victim” as I write this.
Youngest of Six, Sister to an older brother - Suicide, older brother - died in prison 27 years incarcerated for murder, older brother - registered sex offender & two older Sisters - both currently institutionalized.
I can still hear my Mothers voice, telling me at age 9 or 10 that once I got out into real world, then I’d finally realize how good I had it, how life for me would never be that good again...
What a terrifying prospect for a 10 year old child...
Narc parents destroy their kids
I'm so sorry to hear that. Stay strong, my friend. ❤
Sounds like she had plenty of trauma of her own. Very sad for you all. I hope you are doing well ❤
Just recently found your channel and can’t get enough.. this is the balm for my broken soul.. and you’re a silver fox 🦊 as well !
We need humor to keep sane, while we deal with crazy people.Thank you for your youtube channel.
I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. I finally understand why went through I live through a covert, sadistic narcissist, because of you I was able to put together the pieces understand on my background allowed myself to become a victim of him. Thank you.
100% agree with your theory of cluster B personality disorders are response states to trauma, especially CPTSD. Have had this same thought. The threat response, fueled by adrenaline, is also at play keeps the person hypervigilant - they do not have access to the full richness of the prefrontal. Constricted.
The part of the brain where empathy is known to be housed has been shown to be reduced in size in the brains in adults who survived CPTSD.
Love your lectures - thank you ❤
Trauma. That's when one feels shattered. To understand what happened you have to stand outside and look in to put it back together because the trauma event is emotionally overwhelming.
You are right about a traumatized patient relying upon a therapist and the potential of being manipulated.
Thank you dr. I have only recently been diagnosed with CPTSD . I have struggled in the past with anxiety and depression, and other things , but never had a correct diagnosis of what my problem was . The thing is , I have never suffered what the majority of people would call abuse, with the exception of being practically invisible to my parents and raised by a nanny. Poor little rich girl, right? I supposed I never even suspected this tiny detail would have any consequence on my mental health. Apparently it did. I just recently talked to my therapist, also, how I had so many behaviors that fitted with the diagnosis of bpd, yet I knew I was not a borderline. You just explained the reason. Thanks again .
Please don't give up on us Sam! U can't imagine how much u already have impacted this world. I've learned so much from u & now I crave this. It's incredible how good it feels to learn & to actually see my life improve more all the time. U are the greatest thing I've ever found in my life.
I think you are amazing, extremely smart, very funny, unbelievably knowledgeable. Hell to the the negative people. I just watched the "How your childhood effs up your adulthood (adverse childhood experiences)"- it made me cry and hit home very hard. It was bang on though.
Sam, you saved my life! May God bless you ..
I don’t know how I would manage my trauma without you..
keep going my friend, focus on us ppl who admire you . Thank you 🙏
Thank you for sharing your priceless knowledge. I have been diagnosed with Borderline since 12 years old and am finally able to understand it more in-depth thanks to you. My 17 year old son is a narcissist and his abuse has become unbearable. Therapists have been easily manipulated by him or simply don't believe in narcissism in a teenager or have disregarded my concerns as attempting to diagnose my own son. I agree that cluster B personalities are all under the PTSD umbrella.
Sam,
I feel you are the only man in the world who could understand me. I have a personality diagnosis and you speak my language. ❤️
Obviously, surprise to no one, your insights are a helpful, intelligent, and always well-articulated guide to navigating the world of difficult personalities and those they have affected. I have the biological trait of HSP, as I've commented before, and this is about the third time you've mentioned the trait in a video. I've had very unfortunate run-ins with narcissistic persons in workplace situations that have left me incredibly scared of entering new workplaces (for fear there is a narcissistic person present) and I know it affects me more in these situations than others, (my concentration, my work, my self-esteem). Since I've had repeated experiences, I knew how to handle the second time better (with your advice) and I still found a large target on my back because, I believe, my sensitivity, (I can't completely surpress reactions around provoking people and I am mentally very drained just being around them). If you would ever be willing to talk about HSP and Narcissistic relationships and share your insight on this biological trait and how these two people tend to interact and tips for HSP people specifically to protect themselves, I would really appreciate that.
These old long videos are A++
THESE BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS HAVE BEEN THE SINGLE MOST PIVOTAL FACTOR IN DECODING my inner landscape sorry for the caps i just realized you replied to my last comment and got a bit too excited
This is all very interesting after living for 45 years in a marriage with a very unemotional partner and someone it was very difficult to get to talk about their childhood.
I’m so glad that I found your videos! Thank you so much for your help, and what you are doing to help people with your videos. Love and blessings to you!)🙏❤️😊
😢 My teacher,. My doctor, my friend thank you 💔 I could listen to you all day everyday...I wish that I could disassociate...I remember EVERYTHING all the time and remember EVERY feeling all the time...it's awful and lonely because I can't tell anybody...hyper empathize I've never heard of it 😢
I have ADHD and I can't stop watching your long videos. Human socializing and psychology is my hyperfixation though. Okay, I'm going to watch the video now and shut up.
Unrelated Sam, I'm an old follower and haven't been around for a while. I have to say you look great! Thank you for all the work you do.
I'm sorry someone said this about you. I personally find a warmth and true consern from you. Your videos and content involve content that most people avoid and they certainly don't consern themselves with helping individuals who are suffering. There seems to be a societal belief that the only healthy thing to do is abandon anyone labeled as toxic or to flat label a person narcissist and other one word whole labels when there are many complexities to a person. I dont want to get rid of people, but I do need to know how to communicate with someone whom may live on the same planet speak the same language and even have similar cultural back ground yet seem to speak another language than I do. You've helped me to understand not just others but also myself. I have been able to see myself with more truth and understand what it was I had done and that in my relationship with others I had been the dangerous one. I bordered on that enchantress borderline, however I did not start out my life like this as an adult with my first relationship, I experienced a traumatic event during 3rd trimester of pregnancy when I tryed to stop my sons father and brother from driving drunk, I begged them to not go or let me drive at least, he told me to just go with them I could sit in the middle. I sat on his foot wrapped myself around his leg crying begging because I knew his brother had some very dark intentions and wanted to harm someone, and bruce was happy go lucky he just wanted to go where ever his older brother went. Anyhow he laughed and used the door to gently peal me off. When his brothers girlfriend seen them drive past again heading other direction she said hes going to get the gun from his moms. We got into my car to try and catch them before the left there moms, but what I seen coming from the ditch about 3 miles down the road still to this day I see those flames, for years I reacted strongly to the sound of sirens but I didn't know I was doing it, a roommate asked me why do I go around and look all the doors when I hear an ambulance? I was taken aback, I said I'm not its police sirens, and she said ah, no it's not you don't even react to police sirens at all. I thought I was reacting to a fear of criminal dangers. That shocked me. My sons father survived his brother was DOA, and the recovery and hospitalization. It was also traumatic as his head injury created inability to recall what was just said, the doctor warned us all that it would be unhelpful to tell bruce about his brother at that time as hed only have to relive it. His mother felt it was her duty to tell him and she lived far up north so she and the brothers girlfriend decided they would trick me to meet downstairs for Thanksgiving dinner and that's when they did it. I came up with my food because they didn't show up. It was an uproar and they were scrambling beside themselves, Bruce seeing the 2 of them and not me had drawn the conclusion possibly that they were lying to him or mabe I'd been hurt. So they women were quite upset scared and crying and they said Bruce wants you hes screaming for you, I was startled then and asked what happened and all his mom was able to get out before she peeled outa site was , he knows. That left him with a vague understanding something wasnt right he was in the hospital, I tryed to follow what the doctor said and said nothing but he started to ask questions, he would ask about HIS truck, car, other car? He would scratch his head trying to figure this out and then the questions became more direct asking where people were, I would have to tell him and see the pain wash over his face, it was brutal. And as soon as that happened he would be puzzled and it would start from beginning all over again. Time and time again. I had been taken by ambulance also after finding them, it took hours for help to arrive by which time I was exhausted there were at least 3 men who arrived after me and someone had found him thrown from vehicle I immediately tryed to run to him only to be held back and restrained. I knew his brother was dead, and heard someone say hes barely breathing. I immediately thought to myself oh my gosh I wanted to comfort him, if he was going to die what if he was afraid, so I started to yell to him that I was hear your not alone I'm right hear, I love you. But the flames of the car where getting larger and he was so close to it, I started to panic, he was alive and now he might die anyway, my son may never meet his father never know him and started screaming my baby for whatever reason. Theres alot more to this. I was 18 years old. I felt something inside of me snap, it broke and I was angry I understood something had forever been altered in me and I didn't have a say a choice in this thing in me whatever if was. I did not get help for myself my only focus had been getting to Bruce and then caring for him. I Also had bed rest once he was able to come home. We parted eventually when he got into substance use and started to abuse me. It was the most difficult choice but only choice I had. This is when I became like someone elese. I needed the love support of my mother who couldn't see herself in me so I became like her. I was cool with my leather jackets and partied. I had never been this way I was my authentic self very different. I came back to myself when with my 2nd sons father, whom again I learned of his cocaine use and problems insued. I was a good mother stay at home crafted with my toddlers did preschool trips as volunteer. I felt the shaking inside me start again and didn't know who long it would last, I reacted to those physical manifestations not understanding PTSD. I met my husband under this state of deep insecurity after self trashing and he was the brother of a friends boyfriend who was in town who was in greif over life events himself. He just looked at me one day and he asked me if I could just hold him that he just needed to feel loved. And that for me was a very simple request. Love was the only thing I had I could give. And we proceeded to be eachothers one. That one that's like fire and ice. The otherside of the same coin. But he had alchohol and extreme substance abuse issues. We had several years of sobriety and life was good. Then he relapsed and the anger rage violence began, severe abuse to point I couldn't do this anymore. My mother had passed and his jealousy over anything in my life was out of control, he had me alone with only his hateful words. My sons grown came to me and said you leave him or we won't see you anymore. My oldest didn't see the excessive abuse, my youngest couldn't forgive him, because he had tryed to hurt me in the final way, tryed offering my son those drugs! I left because it was the greatest act of love for both of us. 4 years later suddenly after being hateful everyday says his dreams can't come true unless hes with me, ect. Wants me to meet him alone, I won't because I have heard he has become scitzophranic from drug abuse. I'm deeply saddened but knew I could never go back. He wanted to bring alive a vixen a seductress that was my mid to early thirties with him. My health and age and possibly my return of self. Whoever I was aware of the 2 so tryed to merge them and think I did that very well for years. But I wasnt happy with his I jump you jump aproch trying to get me to join his reckless selfish act of losing himself intentionally to substance abuse. Your videos help me. Currently I am dealing with a much more difficult situation with a younger brother that I share a home inherited. He refuses to pay or share expenses I care for his son and hes left me unable to care for my own needs while only doing for his cars his room doesn't allow me in the outbuildings. People say do this do that but they have no idea the tight line I must walk.
So can we ever recover from. trauma ? Thousands and thousands of traumatized, abused children desperately need help
Once the mind is right, the healing can begin.
From my experience the mind has to be built up to it. It takes a while. Additionally, certain triggers you are not aware of can set you back ALOT. Awareness is key to prevent a backsliding that will cost you months or years to recover from.
Wow. Thank you very much. This video is the clearest explanation of SD theory that I have encountered, and framing it as a deficit of integration brings clarity to the issues in a very powerful way. Also a very intriguing invitation to learn about Cold Therapy.
Always an educational entertaining pleasure listening to you . 👍🏻
You have taught me alot about myself as a Co dependant I've had a narcissistic husband for 22 years i never knew what was wrong with me until I saw your videos and realized it's not me at all it's him now the hard part how to get away thank you for posting
I like how he pointed out in the one recent video how it's not all the narcissist, its the codependent in a fantasy as well. I got away about 2.5 years ago. Now im working on removing my heart from their power. (Ex husband, mom, dad, and the Jehovahs witness narcissistic cult i was involved in).
@@narcslayer9844 yea same for me. I'm 32 years old and just woke up from it all the past couple of years. I have to shake my head sometimes on how much BS I allowed from so many aspects. Were u in the JW cult before as well? I actually got baptized at 14 n everything 🙄
After listening to the entire talk, I do think many of these reactions result from childhood trauma and lack secure attachment. The brain organizes itself for survival under duress in weird ways.
This is amazing content. My gf has BPD , cptsd and disassociation , though unsure of the functional and primary or secondary ( 1.11.33 approx. ) What came to mind is her recent diagnosis of FND functional neurological disorder , after a 5 month hosp sysy thru eventually diagnose with FND , and left in a wheelchair . Breaks my heart .
I wonder if you could do a video on FND as it relates to the BPD and CPTSD, rating disorder issues. Some days I had seen her walk , I was floored , most days in a chair. Have not found anyone who understands this disorder. Thank you Dr you are a genius . My heart breaks daily for her .
I can help with this, suffered from it and have overcome. She must find self love.
Thank you for confirming what I have thought since I started educating myself about narcissism. For awhile now, I have thought narcissism was due to PTS.
11:51 Professor Vaknin, when you describe dissociation in the Freudian sense, I wonder if coupled with amnesia, theres a place you escape to instead as a child and as an adult when we experience these things that may be remotely close to the type of abuse endured-it produces feelings of revulsion or feelings of shame/guilt or whatever they caused at the time, but you don’t know why because as a child you literally went to another world while the abuse was taking place.. sorry guess not really a question but this is very interesting anyway you never disappoint.. thank you 😊
Amnesia is a form of dissociation.
Phenomenal insight and application of the empirical data - as usual! Quantifying qualitative traits is exactly what we need to push these ideas in the direction of becoming ideals to heal! Bravo, Sam - and thank you!
I loveeeeeeeeee your channel..your work is AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGG Profesor Vaknin..well done and all the besttttt of luckkkkkk..thank u so muchhhhhhhh for helping us specially the empath to the understanding of the NARC by an accurate information..
Stop being obstinate and accept ....spot on.... lack of acceptance is a huge problem among mankind
Wonderful podcast.
Temerity! I love looking up new words. Thanks for that.
I have DID- and the theory of structural dissociation felt like someone stole my idea. I was shocked. It was basically how I had explained DID to everyone around me. I'm thankful it's becoming more well known.
Thank you so much for this. I now understand a bit more. Have been diagnosed with CPTSD and DID.
I love your sense of humor 🤣
I am a pragmatist. I live in reality. I know that I myself am the mechanism beihind my failures, my achievements, and have been well tempered by both.
Not antisocial but then again, I can also be at peace if I don't see or speak to individuals if I don't feel like it.
No stranger to violence, deception, nor betrayal. Have dished it out myself. It is human default programming. I've become numb as you say, yet not incapable of sympathy nor empathy. Some folk just travel like rivers in life.
I believe I live two lives. The one I learn from, and the one I choose to live thereafter. It's all my choice.
One thing I do know is that I can look myself in a mirror, self analyze, cope with regret, and celebrate confidence. Confidence in knowing I survived and have an opportunity with every first conscious breath, every morning, to correct myself and move on. Simple, I free my mind and my arse tends to follow. Nothing narcissistic, just humbleness and knowing it's just better to be alive
I like the way you think. Noted.
This is a psychological string theory.
Wow! I JUST stumbled on THAT channel while searching for one your videos yesterday and wondered if you were aware of it, Sam. What are the offs that I’d click on this video on dissociation and you mentioned THAT other video. You ARE an all-knowing god who guides us to the information we need. 😀
My sin is CPTSD whoever helpt me to dissociate thank you
Sam you are a pschologist thank God for the people you have minimug....... keep up the good work please ❤
I am not a psychologist. I am an author of books in psychology and a former visiting professor of psychology.
@@samvaknin dear Sam thank you just discovered your channels so I haven't been through all the blogs, still what your saying is helping me either way, I'm still on my hopefull recovery of diagnosed CPTSD
So whatever someone says attacking you f##k them it's a fight we won't
Loose 😻
I had to laugh when you suggested that your viewers needed to look up the meaning of temerity, that was perfect.
I've searched😂
Hope extends suffering and aggravates pain
Lol gurl you crackin me up. The intro here.
Genius, 💯 helpful
36 years old my name is Joey I've been living with myself and recently with diagnosis having both classic and covert borderline personality disorder I have been having to consciously try to surface some of my repressed memories and I have found it liberating even though I don't really know why that I was born susceptible and ultimately I just didn't have people who valued the high value person that I was and I use this reference as I was a Porsche that was highly valuable and I had owners who valued bicycles the only thing is I was a Porsche that was durable but eventually I fell apart in terms of all the things that happened and everything that has to be rewired subconsciously to cope over the years and then I had some of my family members actually use some of my own truth and self to make myself believe in what they were telling me like I was nothing you would get girls if you didn't have this imperfection so there was malevolence as well I forgive myself and I forgive the people who either consciously knew what was happening which was malice and neglect or didn't have the own capacities and tools because of their own Character defects I really appreciate all these videos you post here I at least want to have a chance of sustaining the want and need to keep trying to help myself knowing exactly what I have and why I have it and ultimately not beating myself up because I have kind of wasted my life and the people who created me didn't give a crap that there was potential there to begin with
I have truly tried to find an answer to this question for years….. I know that CTSD can be induced in a ”later stage” of childhhod once many critical mental parts of the self have been developed (like after the age of 6). Is this the case of pure NPD and BPD, or do they require a super early onset of trauma to have their ”particular trauma effect” on the mental constructs? Can repeated trauma actually make someone loose/disintegrate their true self once it has been constructed…?
Thank you.
Thank you ❤
I love your honest 💞💞💞 that was interesting topic
Would like to hear you talk about preverbal trauma cauaes relinquishment and adoption.
Search the channel for “adopt”.
As I'm listening to this, I can't help but wonder if Sam has a theory about how functional neurological disorders fit into theories of trauma, disassociation and the like. The neurologists and psychologists I've had interactions with don't seem to ever have a glancing opinion on FNDs, perhaps because as I've heard, the condition operates at the interface of both fields. I don't know. Nobody really wants to deal with FND's lol. But I got to think FNDs could potentially give some clues about the mechanics of trauma, emotional regulation, disassociation etc.., something. Could be just wishful thinking on my part. Anyway, thank you Sam for always coming with the interesting discussions.
You make me chuckle 😅
I switch. What you describe in this video happens to me.
Sir you are remarkable! I am absolutely amazed at the way you explain this personality disorder so well it is mind blowing ! You spoke on cheating on the narcissist and you spoke on three types of cheating! And how the the Narcissist reacted ! Could you speak on cheating as revenge from the Narcissist cheating first! My Husband cheated and I cheated to show him how it hurt and then maybe he would feel the heartache and stop once he realized how it felt! Of course I just ended up being the sorriest dog despite his affair first ! Well mine lasted a month and his lasted for a year and a half after yet I was the sorry piece of shit ! Help please
A simple, reasonable theory-just contemplating it aids the needed subconscious truce.
@Juliette M Understood. Best of luck to you.
Being molested by 2 7yr old boys that lived next door to me at the age of 3 yrs old - flashbacks beginning at 19yrs old then confused and thinking my father was the abuser 10 years ago..now 38yrs old only to have therapy a year ago for a full year and being diagnosed as Borderline Personality Disorder and realising I had it wrong the past 10 years that my loving father did not do anything like that at all -parents divorced at 9 and didn't see my father consistently over the years to now where I was estranged to him for the past 10years - reconnected with him last year and sadly he pasted December 2021 of Dementia - possibly caused by his lifestyle as an alcoholic - However I am grateful to have the last couple of months with him....I'm wondering if I actually am BPD or just too much trauma and absent father had caused my "Daddy Issues" throughout my 20s punishing myself by dating "the bad boy" with a trail of broken and abusive relationships - whether physical or mental...just wondering what you think Prof Sam? Or am I just a crazy person lol ...my younger brother suicide at 25yrs old - he was diagnosed with Bipolar in prison and had ADHD as a young child..always wondered if I was ADHD
I would also recommend the groundbreaking work on Trauma by Dr. Judith Herman ("Trauma and Recovery" ).
Clearly you haven’t listened to the video where her work occupies a good 10 minutes. Not impressed.
Is it possible to cure the "clivage" ("splitting" by Ferenczi) caused by childhood trauma?
I just have to salute! You!!!! Wish I could ask you about what to do about thes campaign which is in full bloom and everybody just enables it. I wish to just sue everybody for being this incompetent! Your videos are just heaven to my Ears! And it just goes Klick Klick Klick klick and I feel my power getting coming back! Thank you! You are really the first and only who knows about all this! And thank you!!! I just thought that I am surrounded from incompetent „supporters“ ! And Nobody gets that this is set up through my ex! Everybody is not listening and so I just have gave up! Because I am just sick of this invalidation and not even know what is gaslighting. Here in my country only with going to court and „prove of all this“ People can validate it! Because it’s not possible - only in films😂😂 please get me out of this!
No contact is the best thing after a childhood of Insanity 🎉
Hey AntiChrist, been waiting on you, you're late, mate!!!
@@aloysiusdevanderabercrombi470 eyyy....hi Rebecca, from Rebekah (real name used. Faye is my doggo)
I am a Sagittarian ENTP, for those who study outside of Narcissistic personality types.
I get bored thinking about my Narc all day.
Omg love this
Karla Shmeeda Vlasta Lol
It is for most people biological meaning the kid probably is pretty smart pretty sensitive the potential is there for maybe that person to be a millionaire and be a great contributive society but only in which if they're there constant care is by somebody who is paying attention to them and really cognitively gifted themself to where they're not going to put the child in a situation where it creates this mind to either have to involuntarily not interpret what has happened and repress it I say and possibly constitute a lack of development in terms of coping and owning that memory there needs to be proper parenting at least in my case at least I won't lie to myself cuz I have done great at telling myself that I had control maybe I'm lying to myself and now you know I'm at a point where I don't know who I am and I I want to keep at least being able to function and do my job and help others even though I am like a empty hollow shell with the drain at the bottom I still have love in my heart and I'm a good person and I have always been however I will say that there are some people in this world that have great parents and somehow find the reasoning rationale and appealing this to become a level and to actually exacerbate and create false reasoning for themself to me those are psychopaths there are variables there are different individual reasonings why but ultimately my instance was hereditary and Gene related and I was susceptible but I was smart and I still am smart without any credibility however I'm really mad because I know there's a lot of people out there that are going to tell other people that they're lying they're gaslighting they're being a narcissist they had control they're choosing to become somebody who tells themselves something and believe their own lives there are those cases but you have to keep individualizing me after nobody wants to believe that the mind can be altered to a point where actual neuro connections and owning of experience to create a thick skin can be done you know the brain is not just a durable car I'm not a Porsche car that can regenerate itself and I had control over everything I am an experienced interpreter my brain is just there to collect information and to have processes and and being able to have the ones around me give me proper instructions and reason to tell me why especially in the trauma I cannot have to see my mom get beat up when I was 5 years old and go down and see the guy who did it and somehow I don't have any sort of figure towards him I just it's a normal thing because I have done things already to interpret it that way so I will protect myself that is not normal and it's not right individualization still has to be made sad to me that there are going to be a bandwagon of like-minded people that are on creditsize actual trauma but it's there and it's real it really is and some people you know they're creating children that can be wonderful contributors to society from the start and from the start they are constantly observing the child and Catering to the needs of its brain development where even if they were susceptible their parents gave them enough intervention and love to make those memories owned and obviously the brains neural pathways are all functioning and thus BPD will not be
Or the middle of the end !!
I Thank you for your priceless know;ege, you ARE Amazubg! I watch all of your videos repeatedly, and learn something new each time. I just ended a 18 year relationship with COVERT, so I am blessed tremendously to be single, and celebacy can be a joy! I had cut off all sexual relations, because of the cheating, and ignored his nonsense and chaos until threw him out! I am only 52 and will never let anyone treat me like rubbish ever again. You have been such a HUGE Blessing to me, and you are rather handsome and easy on the eyes as well, lol don't get the big head now! Just wanted to thank you for everything, not just helping me, but also millions of others too. Would love to meet you in person but know is rather impossible, or attend one of your seminars or meetings held. Have a great day your royal gorgeousness
May I ask for your opinion on the Stellate Nucleus Block for trauma? On one hand, reports of great results with some veterans. On the other - the method is known since 1925; I’d expect that if it were that great, there would be no trauma problems in existence. What do you think, please?
Thanks a lot for your work!🖖🏻
You mean GANGLION block? www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK442253/
Yes, ganglion!, it’s PNS, my mistake :). The link you have sent me is exactly right on. Thank you so much.
May I ask for the link for your cold therapy?
Dr. Vaknin, I have found and read your article “ Cold Therapy and Narcissistic Disorders of the Self” in JCRCR, and the related videos. Very! interesting. It’s a case of PTSD. Not yet sure how to proceed. Thank you.
Just one question.
is cold therapy applicable to a covert narcissist?
To anyone with a False Self.
@@georgiaparaskevaidis5167 sarcasm😂
@@ptrblz invisible to those who don't know about these type of people and I bet once you know this shit no covert narcissist is invisible... You can easily identify just by looking at there body language and style of speaking
@@georgiaparaskevaidis5167 the narc probably thinks everyone else needs a cold shower
@@ptrblz my mom!!!! Everyone thinks she's an angel. Literally she surpasses Lady Jezebel and the Devil himself is highly impressed with her ultra covert nature!!!
I am hoping to stay off social media for a few weeks so I won’t be triggered.
"not nightmarish" 🤣
precisely the problem.
Kathy Steele butler,Janet brown, damn and I'm trying to test my cognitive ability and not lose the place in this video I need to read the stuff cuz I really finding a lot of self need to find out really what's happening and of course being seen by professional I'm in no way shape or form a doctor but I have never got to a point where I want to commit suicide and I never want to get to a point where I believe wholeheartedly that I have something wrong with me and that maybe I don't but I'm really just glad that I could possibly learn more about what's really been happening and get it documented with the doctor and ultimately get treatment and at this point probably Social Security because of the damage I've done to my driver's license three times by speeding drinking driving and of course my reputation is being a person I have not had any sort of stable relationship both personally and professional I have found ways to just come completely create the problem and because I saw the potential of it there so I'm just really glad that I'm just stepping out of this comfortable hell that I've been in for a long time thank you
Yes they do,. And fill me with pills that don't work and make me sleep all day God I wish that I could move and have you as a therapist 😢
😂😂😂😂😂 intro ❤❤❤❤❤
Just if you were naive and trusted without knowing if your counterpart has any deep reflection (emotional intelligence). You can have high analytical IQ. This is measured. But never the inner reflection.
you sound like javier bardem. lucky -__-
Anti christ ? Doesnt he have one eye and blind in the other ? Hahaha
This is how the Muslims envision him. But they have yet to meet me!
How do we know he sees from both??? 👀👁️🔍
Nope. Sam has helped too many people. He didn’t have to. Not the anti.
@@marym897 📠