@@maximtcaciuc2904 Still wasn't as single minded about it in the books as he was here in his 'personality wiped clean' amnesia mindset lol but he mostly calms down about sex by the time of Wild Hunt.
@@maximtcaciuc2904 In 3 you can sleep whit 7 women. In witcher 2 its 3. You are on to something. It must be added that the witcher 3 is way bigger and has you meet alot of people so the opportunities are more.
@@maximtcaciuc2904 The books span a lot of years as he ages very slowly, he didn't really sleep with too many women. The games make him seem more like a ladies' man...
It also doesn't make sense if you think about it. She says "my body demands love" as if she's been celibate for too long already. Put then how often does she normally have sex for procreation? Does she have like 17 daughters?
Witcher 1 has these kind of lines on top of the characters’ severe lack of expression and physical gestures while conversing. It’s the perfect formula for a good deadpan comedy
Honestly, a lot of old games are like that, + CDPR was a really small studio back then. But honestly thats what makes those old games without big budget so endearing.
It's a fucking nightmare especially the village one that girl made me circle around the town for 2 hours to finally sleep with her she probably bugged out somewhere that's probably why it has taken that long for to find her
Perfect balance of dead inside and ironic seriousness. I love how they did him in the third aswell tho he has some of the best one liners and that lack of emotion is the cherry on top
@@panagia9007 Don't fucking talk about "the real Geralt" without having read the books. You probably can't even properly pronounce his name, as if it was hard in the first place.
I'm curios if they'll redo the dialogue in the remake. I'm like 80% certain witcher fans (realistically the show and 3rd game) have no idea how horny earlier witcher stuff was.
It's a thing that they definitely toned down after the first game. Geralt in the first game can have sex with like 20-30 people. They're definitely going to lower the amount of romance cards, or flat-out remove them, in the remake.
The first Witcher is meme material all around but also had my favorite quote out of the series. "What of your other sword? I always heard witchers carry two, silver for monsters and steel for humans." "Both are for monsters."
Are you sure you're not mixing up something with the ending? When he's about to stab a human with his silver sword and the interaction goes something like Human:but silver is for monsters! Geralt: precisely
In my opinion, the first witcher has the best atmosphere of the entire trilogy. Walking through Vizima you feel the poverty, the disease, the bodies in the gutters. The same way you feel the danger in the swamps and how easily people disappear there. Great game from my country :)
Women overlook the cringe when you have the body of a marble statue and they just watched you slay a swamp monster three times your size with a hand tied behind your back
In the remake, black Gertrude will tell ze/zem that sex and gender is just a social construct and reproduction is bad for the planet, which will make the romance much easier.
If they don't keep this interaction in the remake, I will actually be so heartbroken. This kind of ridiculous shit is part of what made the first Witcher game so entertaining to me.
One of the wildest ones is that you can romance a noble woman in the Trade Quarter by either giving her the claw of a monster or trying to give her money (she feels treated like a prostitute and likes it lol).
The Witcher 1 was where I learnt everything about women, which unfortunately turned me into an Incel since now I'm offended IRL when women I've just met don't sleep with me for a bunch of flowers. :(((
I played both the Witcher 3 and Witcher 1 at similar times but the first game was pure entertainment. I really can't remember having this much fun in any game
I couldn't get past the button clicking catapult section near the start. It looked great. I wonder if some sort of autoclick could have done it. Oh well.
I was half expecting a "dammit she knows" after she said witchers are sterile but no. The man has a backup plan for everything, which makes sense for a witcher.
Hard disagree, I still like the show despite the rumors that are based on hearsay, funnily enough said hearsay is believed without question but any hearsay about Henry Cavill is dismissed out of hand or treated with skepticism like hearsay is supposed to be treated...almost like we choose to believe based on feelings rather than objectivity...oh well
@@shawnhenderson2091 You needed to use the word ‘hearsay’ one more time to convince me. J/K But seriously, the show is going plummet without Henry. And that’s a dagger to my heart because the Witcher world is probably my favorite fantasy setting. Season one was so good too…
@@shawnhenderson2091 how do you "hard disagree" if vast majority disliked season 2 and despise Blood Origin, while this game is acknowledged as very good for it's time and Witcher fans love it?
@@AnonymousForPPL Majority disliked season 2? How do you figure? I saw no complaints in large scale about that season until AFTER the Henry Cavill drama began. Before that and during the weeks following its release on Netflix I saw only one complaint, the character who died (not gonna say to avoid spoilers) at Kaer Moren. Beyond that it was heaps of praise. In fact, the imdB scores still reflect that, averaging 8 or higher including the finale. I think its a retroactive reaction by some, maybe not you and some of your friends, but some out there and I see it reflected in the things I laid out here. Blood Origin is a flop, not gonna contend you on that one, but its not the same writers as the Witcher series itself. And I'll reiterate another point in that Andrej Sapkovski has enjoyed the show's adaptation thus far, and this "the writers hate the source material" angle is based on one guy saying he heard it from another person on set...yet that gets treated as gospel truth while the rumors said of Henry on set behavior is dismissed out of hand...look, all I am saying is I personally enjoyed season 2, my firends and family enjoyed it, imdB reviews indicate others enjoyed it, I heard little complaints before Henry announced his departure, I think we should wait and see before summarily hating the show...I'd hate to see season 3, enjoy it and then watch it tumble because of purists online and Henry Cavill loyalists...if it sucks, then fine, I'll be right there with y'all agreeing it sucks and dismissing the show from my mind...THAT is all I mean by hard disagree.
Ah, the good old "Poke'em all" game. It was impossible to get all the cards in the same play through unfortunately. And some of the cutscenes involved were hilarious. If the remake doesn't have this feature then there's no point making it.
Yep, geralt could be really weird on the first game, i like how The witcher 2 & 3 speaks strong about the neutrality of geralt but in the first game you could ask triss to have a family with her and adopt some kids, just for 3 days after making out with a random peasant's daughter just because you happened to be there. Im glad they are remaking the first game, the story of the witcher child is so awesome and the ending, even if it was predictable at mid game, was astonishing. I didnt like the combat but the combos felt really good and the story makes it worth playing.
Damn this dialogue is actually so hilariously bad. Dryad: "no sex without procreation" Geralt: "how about yes" Dryad: "OK you win" Geralt did not present anything that Dryad is not aware of already so that dialogue really does not make sense.
@@undeadbandit835 as a Pole, I'm warning, don't get your hopes up, there was a rainbow flag in the news feed for Cyberpunk 2077 on GOG around 1.5 update and I think CD PR has a studio in America.
@@vulthurmir2478 I am a German and I envy you Poles for not getting as woke as we are. Germany has become a clown nation now and lost all of its former glory. I really dislike the LGBTQ nonsense and I am telling you this as a gay man.
@@omegapirat8623 one likely reason why we're not as woke is one you wouldn't envy, which is the past 200 years of being split apart by either our or foreign governments. We had a choice of learning how to resist foreign pulls or have our identities perish.
I like how there is a wrong and even more hilarious answer for "Why fuq with witcher if witcher sterile?" It had something about rolling on a soil making it more fertile for plants to grow 🤣
Amnesia Geralt was out of control.
Like he wasn't pre amnesia, I swear in the books he almost has a higher body count in the bed than in the field
@@maximtcaciuc2904 Still wasn't as single minded about it in the books as he was here in his 'personality wiped clean' amnesia mindset lol but he mostly calms down about sex by the time of Wild Hunt.
@@thelaw6267 interestingly I think he unsheathes his 3rd sword more times in Witcher 3 than in Witcher 2, not certain though
@@maximtcaciuc2904
In 3 you can sleep whit 7 women. In witcher 2 its 3.
You are on to something.
It must be added that the witcher 3 is way bigger and has you meet alot of people so the opportunities are more.
@@maximtcaciuc2904 The books span a lot of years as he ages very slowly, he didn't really sleep with too many women. The games make him seem more like a ladies' man...
"Sorry, sex without procreation is not recognized by my culture"
"Yea but feel good tho"
"Aight can't argue with that"
It also doesn't make sense if you think about it. She says "my body demands love" as if she's been celibate for too long already. Put then how often does she normally have sex for procreation? Does she have like 17 daughters?
Aight imma head in
MY MEDALLION IS HUMMING 😏
I'm a Witcher. Sex is part of my culture.
Hahahaha you took the video but reworded it as black slang hahahahaha
geralt of rizzia
I'm stealing this
@@PalashaGabarra everyone using this whatu mean
i loled
Geralt of Rivia, the Rizzler
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Witcher 1 has these kind of lines on top of the characters’ severe lack of expression and physical gestures while conversing. It’s the perfect formula for a good deadpan comedy
Making up for the absolute emotional apathy with mad dialogue lol
Alpha frame
Honestly, a lot of old games are like that, + CDPR was a really small studio back then.
But honestly thats what makes those old games without big budget so endearing.
Witcher 1, oblivion and morowind. Those are the trio of emotionless dialogues that are histericly funny
Kinda like Deus Ex too lol
I spent hours getting every single romance card in this game. 😩
Very well spent time, my king
The Witcher: Geralt's Quest for Sex
It's a fucking nightmare especially the village one that girl made me circle around the town for 2 hours to finally sleep with her she probably bugged out somewhere that's probably why it has taken that long for to find her
Witcher 1 was the first witcher card game
@@RenatoMoulin1 based and true 😂
I’m convinced that Geralt was just using Axii during this whole interaction.
she was using him too. there was mutual using.
Wow
U expanded witcher lore 😂
Nah, you unlock Axii later.
Hell no. This would actually work if you’d found a girl like that.
In fact, there are. They’re called religious girls.
The way Geralt looks in Witcher 1 is my favorite visual interpretation of Geralt.
Perfect balance of dead inside and ironic seriousness. I love how they did him in the third aswell tho he has some of the best one liners and that lack of emotion is the cherry on top
i don't see why people think henry cavill's Geralt is any good, his geralt show to many facial emotions to be a real Geralt
@@panagia9007 Don't fucking talk about "the real Geralt" without having read the books.
You probably can't even properly pronounce his name, as if it was hard in the first place.
I love his crackhead stare.
@@Big-BossX dead inside armed and dangerous meth-head albino.
"sex" - Geralt of Rivia
I'm curios if they'll redo the dialogue in the remake. I'm like 80% certain witcher fans (realistically the show and 3rd game) have no idea how horny earlier witcher stuff was.
I'm really hoping the remake looks and feels truly next gen and amazing, but still keeps the original dialogue lmao.
I wish everyone could read the books...
@@luisphelipecarvalho5990 sadly the books aren't for everyone, most people would find it kinda boring
It's a thing that they definitely toned down after the first game. Geralt in the first game can have sex with like 20-30 people. They're definitely going to lower the amount of romance cards, or flat-out remove them, in the remake.
"In Wyzima you can be cum"
This whole game is just a gem
The "not truuuuuue" Geralt says when you try and enter Shani's house drunk is my personal favourite
Absolute gold
When say "Die hag!" to her grandma and it actually kills her is pretty good as well
@@bearok89 why does everyone think she's her grandma? She's just a random lady Shani rents a room from.
The first Witcher is meme material all around but also had my favorite quote out of the series.
"What of your other sword? I always heard witchers carry two, silver for monsters and steel for humans."
"Both are for monsters."
Are you sure you're not mixing up something with the ending?
When he's about to stab a human with his silver sword and the interaction goes something like
Human:but silver is for monsters!
Geralt: precisely
@@Al77343 Naw different quote. The one I wrote here is earlier in the game when Geralt only has a steel sword with him
@@Al77343 Not just any human, that was like the main bad guy of the entire game
"The one between my legs is for the ladies."
The problem with that quote is it's just a worse version of a quote from the books.
In my opinion, the first witcher has the best atmosphere of the entire trilogy. Walking through Vizima you feel the poverty, the disease, the bodies in the gutters. The same way you feel the danger in the swamps and how easily people disappear there. Great game from my country :)
Even as a horny teen back in 2007 I felt slightly weirded out by some of these random scenes where Geralt beds women with the cringiest dialogue.
just like in the books
My man Geralt can be cringe but he gets game every time.
back in the olden times of that era it wasn't cringy because lines weren't common like that
Women overlook the cringe when you have the body of a marble statue and they just watched you slay a swamp monster three times your size with a hand tied behind your back
@@Rajastega Sex appeal level up ! 100 haaaaaaa🎵
God I hope the entire romance system of this game is preserved in the remake
I read they have already decided to remove collectible sex cards because sexism
Remake????
@@parasitic1344 Yeah, CDPR announced they are remaking the first game. No release date yet.
@@icaromiranda9981 based CDPR
In the remake, black Gertrude will tell ze/zem that sex and gender is just a social construct and reproduction is bad for the planet, which will make the romance much easier.
the editing is what made this gold lol
nicely done mate
If they don't keep this interaction in the remake, I will actually be so heartbroken. This kind of ridiculous shit is part of what made the first Witcher game so entertaining to me.
Yep remove the sex cards if they want but not the content.
You know you have godlike game, when you turn being completely sterile into something sexy.
Gerizzler of Rizzvia
I'm pretty sure the whole authorial intention of making witchers sterile is to have them be able to fuck without any consequences
I remember when i just wanted to feed the elves in the cave, i was confused when a card appeared when i gave the girl elf some grapes.
Witcher 1 will always have a very special place in my heart for being a very special game
Geralt in the first game really gets around
They don't call him geralt of rizzia for nothing.
Surprisingly iirc this was one of the harder romances to get…most women in the game can be romanced by giving them ice cream or a red scarf.
One of the wildest ones is that you can romance a noble woman in the Trade Quarter by either giving her the claw of a monster or trying to give her money (she feels treated like a prostitute and likes it lol).
yeah i remember failing this on the first try hahaha
The Witcher 1 was where I learnt everything about women, which unfortunately turned me into an Incel since now I'm offended IRL when women I've just met don't sleep with me for a bunch of flowers. :(((
@@Thanatos833 That's rough, buddy.
Just like in real life
I played both the Witcher 3 and Witcher 1 at similar times but the first game was pure entertainment. I really can't remember having this much fun in any game
I couldn't get past the button clicking catapult section near the start. It looked great. I wonder if some sort of autoclick could have done it. Oh well.
I don't know why I find this so funny but thank you for the Witcher 1 appreciation
Amnesia hit geralt so hard he forgot how to act
Card collecting in the witcher 3 vs witcher 1
Still better than the netflix series
A Netflix adaptation we deserved
witcher geralt: witching them bitches since 2007
Already can't wait to see all the comparison videos between the original and the remake in a few years.
Me tooooo
This sequence basically sums up the first Witcher game perfectly.
I have not facepalmed harder in my life than when looking at this.
As a pole I'm proud of both Witcher 1 and 3, for entirely diffrent reasons
witcher 2 is good too, if it wasnt so buggy
We REALLY NEED MORE OF THIS
BEST content I've seen in a long time
The editing just makes it even better.
People who only played Wild Hunt are missing out big time
Now I REALLY want that remake
Wait, I remember this NPC being green and naked
It's a mod, had to censor it for yt. No clue how she lost the skin color tho 🤷
@@RenatoMoulin1 Damn that whitewashing
I really appreciate you for making this, I don't think they'll match this raw energy in the remake
When your speech skill is 100
I was half expecting a "dammit she knows" after she said witchers are sterile but no. The man has a backup plan for everything, which makes sense for a witcher.
Ready to play the witcher 1 now. Thanks
And this is gonna be removed in Remake among many other dialogues to "fit" the modern audience.
CDPR said themselves.
Feels like it was written by an AI lmao
PURE GOLD
Geralt of Rizzia
Hope the youtube algorithm picks this up. 484 views is not fitting.
Boy did the algorithm pick up
Your wish was granted
@@HOTLink-xq7pm it did
Congrats, it has 80 thousand
@@kendarr and it's ap to 385 thousand.
lmfao, i wonder if they gonna keep this in the remake
They better
We are in 2023. I will take a very wild guess and say no chance.
I hope not.
I'd rather have actual romances with interesting characters.
If i want to hear funny dialogues followed by sex, i watch porn.
Objectively better than season 3 is looking.
Hard disagree, I still like the show despite the rumors that are based on hearsay, funnily enough said hearsay is believed without question but any hearsay about Henry Cavill is dismissed out of hand or treated with skepticism like hearsay is supposed to be treated...almost like we choose to believe based on feelings rather than objectivity...oh well
@@shawnhenderson2091 You needed to use the word ‘hearsay’ one more time to convince me. J/K
But seriously, the show is going plummet without Henry. And that’s a dagger to my heart because the Witcher world is probably my favorite fantasy setting.
Season one was so good too…
@@shawnhenderson2091 how do you "hard disagree" if vast majority disliked season 2 and despise Blood Origin, while this game is acknowledged as very good for it's time and Witcher fans love it?
@@AnonymousForPPL Majority disliked season 2? How do you figure? I saw no complaints in large scale about that season until AFTER the Henry Cavill drama began. Before that and during the weeks following its release on Netflix I saw only one complaint, the character who died (not gonna say to avoid spoilers) at Kaer Moren. Beyond that it was heaps of praise. In fact, the imdB scores still reflect that, averaging 8 or higher including the finale. I think its a retroactive reaction by some, maybe not you and some of your friends, but some out there and I see it reflected in the things I laid out here. Blood Origin is a flop, not gonna contend you on that one, but its not the same writers as the Witcher series itself. And I'll reiterate another point in that Andrej Sapkovski has enjoyed the show's adaptation thus far, and this "the writers hate the source material" angle is based on one guy saying he heard it from another person on set...yet that gets treated as gospel truth while the rumors said of Henry on set behavior is dismissed out of hand...look, all I am saying is I personally enjoyed season 2, my firends and family enjoyed it, imdB reviews indicate others enjoyed it, I heard little complaints before Henry announced his departure, I think we should wait and see before summarily hating the show...I'd hate to see season 3, enjoy it and then watch it tumble because of purists online and Henry Cavill loyalists...if it sucks, then fine, I'll be right there with y'all agreeing it sucks and dismissing the show from my mind...THAT is all I mean by hard disagree.
Hearsay? YOU MEAN HERESY!
"Want to buy some fresh milk?!"
"Hmm, I don't see any cows around here."
"I lived in the country and I have my ways!"
Bro is the CEO of rizz
I really don't remember the game like this. The dialog felt normal when I played it.
Ah, the good old "Poke'em all" game. It was impossible to get all the cards in the same play through unfortunately. And some of the cutscenes involved were hilarious.
If the remake doesn't have this feature then there's no point making it.
Rollercoaster of emotions
Gooood, let the love flow through you.
Geralt starts with G for a reason.
Yep, geralt could be really weird on the first game, i like how The witcher 2 & 3 speaks strong about the neutrality of geralt but in the first game you could ask triss to have a family with her and adopt some kids, just for 3 days after making out with a random peasant's daughter just because you happened to be there.
Im glad they are remaking the first game, the story of the witcher child is so awesome and the ending, even if it was predictable at mid game, was astonishing. I didnt like the combat but the combos felt really good and the story makes it worth playing.
Yeah the gameplay is clunky as hell but you get used to it.
this is gold
Geralt the rizzmaniac as always
MY EARS ARE BLEEDING, THANK YOU!
I lulled too hard from the editing
subbing for these this is so good oh my god
This is amazing!!
Masterful.
This better be in the remake
They better keep this in the remake. It's not the Witcher 1 if I can't finish my card collection again.
Geralt got skillz. Respect
Damn this dialogue is actually so hilariously bad.
Dryad: "no sex without procreation"
Geralt: "how about yes"
Dryad: "OK you win"
Geralt did not present anything that Dryad is not aware of already so that dialogue really does not make sense.
Some other comment said these might as well have been written by an AI and i'm still recovering my breath.
Her body demanded love
It seems you never had to convince a lady to sleep with you at the first date.. 😂
We all know The Witcher 1 will be remade for "modern audiences". A scene like this won't be in it
If you will be proven right then I will haunt you so hard you will piss yourself, each bloody night.
Don't underestimate polish devs. They are not as politically brainwashed as Americans
@@undeadbandit835 as a Pole, I'm warning, don't get your hopes up, there was a rainbow flag in the news feed for Cyberpunk 2077 on GOG around 1.5 update and I think CD PR has a studio in America.
@@vulthurmir2478
I am a German and I envy you Poles for not getting as woke as we are. Germany has become a clown nation now and lost all of its former glory. I really dislike the LGBTQ nonsense and I am telling you this as a gay man.
@@omegapirat8623 one likely reason why we're not as woke is one you wouldn't envy, which is the past 200 years of being split apart by either our or foreign governments. We had a choice of learning how to resist foreign pulls or have our identities perish.
aaaah, the good ol' days, that game was a treasure chest.
To be fair tho, if you've read the books, this is pretty accurate. Author was a horndog fantasizing his ideal Sex God who no woman would say no to.
Lol rly?
the most book accurate game, everyone.
yes, that means the visuals as well.
games are after the books, the game is not accurate with book at all
If they don't keep this in the remake, I ain't
Replaying it 😈
They're making a remake?
@@m97polska How have you not heard?
If it aint in the remaster im PLAYING THE ORIGINAL
They didn`t fixed Cyberbug until now(which is 10 years of production already) and you belive they can go for a remake and don`t screw it up?
@@freespeech3817 Literally not true they only had 2-3 years of production with restarts... not good bait
Awesome dialogue
I swear for a second he was wearing a fedora
ye, Geralt is the hero we deserve...
I think life would be a lot easier for a lot of people if romance was like this in real life.
she had no chance against that witcher rizz
I almost spit out my tea... xD
GERALT OF RIZZIA
Ok, who put clothes on the dryad??
-OG player from OG version
GOLD!
"My body demands love"
Can't wait for the remake!
"Giggidy, giggidy, hmmm."
- A naughty White Wolf
I like how there is a wrong and even more hilarious answer for "Why fuq with witcher if witcher sterile?"
It had something about rolling on a soil making it more fertile for plants to grow 🤣
The other dialogue option is also gold xd
Top tier edits
Giving Adda a hunk of raw meat so you can give her _your_ hunk of raw meat afterwards
This is like dialogue in the later dune books
now i see why everyone is waiting on witcher remake 😇
Son of good mother you earned yourself a card, and not a gwent one
They better keep these dialogues in the remakes
Witcher 1 was another level
I cant wait for re master
Geralt is such a poon slayer its insane
"would you like to be with me? 🥺👉👈"
"yes. : )"
This game felt more like Leisure Suit Larry than Leisure Suit Larry itself.
Absolute jungle fever here