I almost died in a Norwegian peat bog (STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS NORWAY PART 3)
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ต.ค. 2024
- The final and by far the most action packed chapter in this three part series that sees me attempt to cross the magnificent country that is Norway, in a completely straight line. In this episode, I tackle more steep gradients, nearly die in a ghastly bog, and almost score a screamer on a football pitch.
Listen to the newly released "16-Bit Adventure" featuring all the music
from this adventure and more:
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Or purchase it on Bandcamp for £4 here:
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________________________________________________________________________________________
Support me on Patreon & watch the incoming Bonus Footage here (and more exclusive missions!) for $1: / geowizard
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Thanks so much everyone. It’s been a god damn pleasure sharing this series with you. I sincerely hope you found it at least a fraction as epic as I did. See you all for the next adventure. It’s onwards and upwards from here, both in ambition and entertainment. Love you all.
Love you! Also first/ second. Never stop being you! You have great original content and don't sell that out!
Edit: Mongolia next 😉😉
You’re the carrying force of this pandemic
You dont have to worry about me trampling any rare plants since you have inspired me to stay safe at home instead of drowning in a swamp
if you upload at 4k to trick it, youtube will give the file better compression settings and more bandwidth
I love this series! I suggest that, for future trips, you choose lines that include the country's centroid.
Imagine that you're a Norwegian kid playing football and a random British man walks out of the woods. Misses two goals then just climbs a fence to leave.
I think that's the impression most of the world gets of us whenever we do anything
I’m sure Tom will be having nightmares about them two missed goals for years to come
And leaves the ball on the other side of the pitch so someone has to fetch it 😂😭
@@kathhobson5727 I laughed out loud at that. Misses two goals, sends the ball flying across the pitch and just leaves it there and runs into the woods 🤣
Also doesn't even return the ball when it was like 20m away from him
Those kids are forever going to remember the day a random muddy camouflaged man ran across their pitch and asked for a through pass.
And then disappeared again into the forest like some mystical sasquatch.
After shouting Beckham and kicking the balls off and not passing them back
bruh moment
They’ll tell this story to their mates that weren’t there with them but everyone will think they’re bullshitting
I'm laughing so hard at that moment. Just some random British dude appearing out of the woods looking like hell and scrambling onto the field like a maniac lol.
*man covered in mud climbing out of a forest*
"Hey kids!"
British man in remote Norway, as well
In rural US, that's a good way to either be shot, or have the police called on you.
Apparently in Norway, it's a good way for them to say hello back, and the coach to approve them to kick a ball over for you to kick.
That's such a crazy culture difference hahaha.
@@shipwreck9146 that's Europe for you!
@@dexterbudd1589 It's that kinda stuff that makes me really want to move to Europe.
But also really afraid to move to Europe.
@@TristenSarelvun don't be afraid, it's lovely
You came pretty damn close to being found by archeologists in 3157 as a well-preserved bog body.
Nah, he would have become one with the bog
@@lennerzbell2657 bogs don’t decompose human remains very well. Cold cases decades old have been solved by bog bodies being found and identified
@@Vacated204 you hear that? That's the sound of the joke flying over your head
@@reda84. nothing flew over anyones head aside from maybe yours. Might have even hit you in the head, pretty hard it seems.
@@reda84. You think so? Nothing wrong with sharing information, I thought it was interesting. I would hope you don't "woosh" people every time they talk sense, or else soon everything that isn't a meme/joke will be frowned upon
Imagine you’re just chilling at your home and out of nowhere some swamp monster with a British accent comes out of the forest
Bruh moment
Bruh moment
bruh moment
Bruh moment
bruh moment
“The good thing is that you feel that you own the land”
-**Britishness intensifies**
hahahahha
i was thinking the same thing when he said that. gotta be careful, you think like that too much you might accidentally do a colonialism
Lmao 😆
Timestamp anyone?
Exactly what I thought haha
“Beckham!!!”
Those Norwegian kids and their coaches must think you’ve been in the wilderness since 2002 😂
lmfao
Plot twist: This video is recorded 17 years ago
that would explain the 3x4 aspect ratio
@@thef1dude501 I mean that's what the gopro records at id rather have the full pov than it be cropped to fit my screen
@@goosenik2219 I know dude, It’s only a joke.
And gopros record 16:9 as well, don’t know what you’re on about.
Now that he knows the route, its time to speedrun it.
Du Du Du Du
"Now, this is the mud that had almost killed me the first time. I figured out the the best strat is to just take deviation of 3m. "
@Rayxz that does blj mean
If you side step to a summersault over steep gradient 4 you can shave a whole 20 minutes off the time. Only tip I’m giving though.
@@tonyp.1463 Backwars Long Jump, that's a reference from the game Super Mario 64 that is known for it's insane speedrunning strats, with a BLJ you can generate an insane amount of speed
*Nearly dies* "Haha! I was scared of getting a bit stuck ha!"
*misses football shot* "I am gutted. I am a failure to the british people. I can not believe it. I am truly truly sorry for this grave mistake."
Hahahahahaaha
*marches back to bog to punish himself*
I love your username
this shit made me burst out laughing. even when his girl came around he was just gutted about the 'missed shot' instead of being grateful to fucking god for being alive after that bog xDD
@@Daminionz evolution would work way too slow if we didn't think like that.
Almost gets stuck in a bog to not deviate a few meters.
Deviates more than 20 meters in a garden.
😂
Almost died in a bog*
I would rather drown in a bog than to interact with other people
Crossing the country side is completely legal, entering someones garden like that is trespassing, so of course the pressure is higher.
@@57thorns In the UK at least trespassing isn’t actually illegal, it’s only a civil offence.
More tense than every episode of Man vs Wild combined.
Fancy seeing you here Gav.
You here? Makes me smile (:
What até tou doing were?
Collab idea: I attempt to cross Wales in slow motion!
Gavigation!
If you’re interested, there is a place in Chile where the country is only 90 Kms wide, on one end there is snow in the andes, and other end is a sandy beach. It would be cool if someone crossed it for the first time. Contact me if you’re interested its not terribly far from where I live right now. Cheers.
Hope geowizard has seen this and contacted you already it sounds amazing to watch
That would be awesome
90 kms is a lot, but chile would be fun
The Andes are will thought. Might be too dangerous
what part of chile exactly is it?
when you think about it, that first bog could’ve saved his life. if it somehow wasn’t there, he could’ve gotten the idea to try to go through the second bog, and you know
good point
So theoretically, that bog should get a medal for saving his life ?
true
I thought that when watching it, this could have ended so, so much worse. He got so lucky.
You can only sink to no further than roughly your waist in a thick bog or in quicksand, after that you just stop sinking since the buoyancy is so much higher than water (and in water you sink to about your head). It would have still been dangerous since he could have gotten stuck and maybe had no way to contact anyone, but he almost definitely wouldn't have drowned.
Congratulations fantastic effort, the peat bog was horrendous, If things had gone wrong I could imagine people finding your well preserved body in 3000 years time and contemplating why 21st century man lived on a diet of Jelly Babies.
Jelly Babies and rotten Beef Jerky
@@internetrambo366 xD
this is so funny
oh my god I laughed at this for a minute straight
And piss water!
Kids: “...can you pass the ball back?”
Tom: “sorry can’t deviate g2g bye”
I know that's what he had to do but it kinda ruined the moment haha
@@1Latettaja1 just should have laid the gps tracker down at that spot, ran to kick the ball back and on to the journey.
@@alexraymond5572 That's called cheating
I was sooo confused as to why he didn't pass the ball back! Thought it was a European thing
@@alexraymond5572 He does that a lot already.
Seeing the footage of you in the bog makes me understand how people sometimes just disappear into thin air, without a trace
ikr geez
it happens a lot of times, all throughout history. and we have no idea how many because you legit disappear for eternity until the bog gets drained up. i wonder how many animals or people have died in the bog he nearly did...
Like this poor chap en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bocksten_Man
@@Bearodon Seems like he was killed by a person before the land became a bog, the bog just preserved him
My grandpa would always stress about not crossing the mire when I went fishing with him as a lad. It's probably the easiest way to die in the Norwegian wilderness, suddenly there's vacuum swallowing both your legs and you're stuck there slowly sinking until you drown. My butt was thoroughly clenched watching him just walk straight into it here.
It's a better a memory for those kids and for you and us too... The strange Brit in military uniform who came, hit the woodwork twice and disappeared.
As absurd and peculiar the videos themselves look, it must look even absurder and peculiarer to random strangers passing watching :D
And one those kids might find this video on accident and get a explanation for the mysterious british military guy they saw one day in training in 2020.
Im dying, this is funny as fuck, just imagine how random it is when you are at football and a wild Geowizard appears
@@momov4060 not only that but he hit the woodwork twice and never bothered to retrieve the ball for them when he was only meters away. They’ll never know why and it makes him even more mysterious lol
@@youarereadingthis457 and then he continued climbing the fence right in front of them.
And thus, the Norwegian myth of the football-playing Swamp Monster was born. Thank you for sharing this amazing journey Tom!
thats funny
Football trying. It seems Scott Stirling was there to keep.
Still better than lampard
😂😂😂
They say that it leaves trails of candy and rotten meat where it roams, and on cloudy grey days you can hear it cursing at bogs and interrogating the machinations of local insects.
Jesus Christ that bog scene was horrendously anxiety-inducing. Made me feel claustrophobic just watching it. Congrats on not dying!!
yet the thrills were really nice to feel
Bog? What does that mean lol
@@emilartwave throw it on google man, it's like to 2 seconds and will explain much better than any comment here
@@emilartwave peat bog.
@@emilartwave bog/marshlands/ swamps are all in the family of wetlands
my favourite moment is at 24:42 when he asked the mosquito what kinda strategy he was employing
same, he's pretty chill for someone being harassed that hard by insects, I would have lost my temper for sure
I lost it at that moment 😆
It's the way he said it that gets me
Peat bogs are where they've found some of the oldest naturally preserved human remains.
Our wizard came so close to being a future archeological find.
Ha yes I thought of that as well, pleased he got out safe!
i'm surprised he didn't find something accidentally
@@MassachusettsTrainVideos1136 i half expected him to come out with a mammoth tusk lol.
lmao i just thought of that watching it!
Would have been fine had he not thrown his garmin, imagine getting stuck and your emergency link to the world is just out of reach.
"British man literally seconds away from drowning to death in a bog in bizarre attempt to cross Norway in a straight line"
Now THIS is content
... after which he fails to make a goal, twice, embarrassing all of England.
The best content I've ever seen
Ahh a bog that you can potentially sink into and dire, let me walk through it
I suggest a three-part series called "I attempted to score a goal in Norway"
golden comment
Can I get an explanation for us 'Murican's here? Edit: Lmao I didn't get to the end yet. I thought this was a soccer thing 🤣
@@a-a-ron2686 he didn't even say anything particularly regional
@@a-a-ron2686 I'm from usa, how is that confusing he tried to score a goal
@@a-a-ron2686 hahaha "sorry I'm american i don't speak this 'watching the video' language"
Love how he hikes for hours eating nothing but candy and has the audacity to say his stomach doesnt feel too good
the stereotype of gnarled british teeth seems to be because their diet consists of mainly sugar
He mentions being weak from not having eaten proper food just before, perhaps it was too heavy to carry or something?
Health experts: "jelly babies aren't appropriate fuel for strenuous activity"
The Wizard:
And also the doctor :
And also every experienced mountaineer:
Actually the contrary. They do recommend jelly bears, you can see bikers at tour the france eating a handful of jellybears at the finish
@@Vismajor01 True, there used to be a professional team that was sponsored by Jelly Belly as well
Technically the Wizard is the leading expert in cross-country straight-line expeditions so jelly babies are the preferred choice of experts
As a Scandinavian I can tell you that my anxiety shot through the roof when you started walking out further and further into the bog. My grandparents have lost friends to the bog and I have been warned countless times never to walk close to bogs, never do that again please.
When he said he was going to go through the bog my mind was like OH NO
Video has almost 500k views, there's gonna be a lot of natural selection happening soon...
Omg same
Saaame man, I'm English, but lived in Norway as a child, and I once got stuck in a bog, watching this has awakened some deep seated fears
Look at episode 1 of this, he did the same stupid thing.
The amount of suffering this man goes through, purely for our entertainment is remarkable.
wdym this shit look mad fun
@@pxwder1387 looks that way but its probably hell...
The worst part is falling asleep thinking 'i could have fallen'. But other than that it's well worth it. Makes you thankful for not falling off a cliff
@@TimmyMorinII stole your name
@@pxwder1387 yeah nearly dying is fucking rad
The bog is so dangerous and common that in Norway we have this monster you tell your kids about called “nøkken” it’s a monster who drowns you if you go into bogs like that (easy explained)
Isn't she an infinitely beautiful woman luring you there?
@@johndododoe1411 You probably mean "Huldra" which is a forest creature often described as a mystical and beatiful female creature. She was not the one louring you into the bogs or lakes though.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hulder
Nøkken is described as a male creature louring women and children into the water with enchanting songs.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nixie_(folklore)
In Finland, it seems like 90% of the mythological creatures have something to do with killing you in the bog.
Interesting. In Sweden näcken is usually a violin playing spirit that lure people into dangerous rivers. Of course since the mythology features the violin it might be more recent than the bog version.
Supposedly he's also willing to teach you how to play the violin. Nice guy.
Its best described as the sea-weed monster from Plants vs zombies.
But jokes aside, bogs are so unbeleavably dangerous though. One of the things i were constantly reminded of when i was young here in Norway by people (Well into their 60s-too 80s) that i knew was how bad bogs are. Im pretty sure basically every family tree i know have had at least one casualty to one. Atleast the families of the closest people my family knows
That is just P O R R I D G E, I can't even imagine anything mor British than this statement
6:24
i read that as i heard it
Well, he aalso said something along the lines of. "If you're crossing this land, it's yours for a moment. It feels like you've conquered it." I thought that was pretty British...
Just wait 20 minutes until he yells 'BECKHAM' while missing an open goal.
Is porridge not a thing in the US?
expectations: I'VE F****NG DONE IT!!!
reality: Slightly salty, not completely salty.
"How've you got in there? What kinda strategy are you employing?" Is the best thing I've ever heard anyone say to a mosquito
This was one of my fav quotes from this series for sure, haha. Gold.
Those are the kind of things that make me laugh out loud haha
GeoWizard while commiting trespassing: "Whoa I hope there are no cameras"
Also GeoWizard: *Films his act of trespassing and uploads it to TH-cam*
Nah he's in Norway lol, no trespassing here in Nature
@@KuratCTA what about on train tracks?😆
@@Emperorhirohito19272 No one really cares, hah! They assume he's a hunter, going on a hike, or that he has business there. It's Norway for you. People do these things.
Rap snitches, tellin on they business
Trespass is civil law in UK and some countries have right to roam laws
Imagine finishing soccer/football practice only to have a swamp monster with a gopro ask you for a pass and miss.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
He didn't miss. He did that on purpose (◠‿◕)
walking around cliffs: 25m off
walking around swap: 2m off - naaaaah imma walk through this stuff
Almost devoured by a Norwegian peat-bog; goes on to hit the bar on a local football pitch a few hours later. Magical.
These bogs are the most dangerous thing in our mountains
But could he do it on a cold rainy night in the bog?
He painted the corners of the goal too. Damn that was impressive.. in peat-bogged boots no less.
@@palharaldrindal4871 I think he should introduce a rule for future missions - unexpected deathly swamps CAN be walked around.
@@nikobellic570 I imagine after his experience in the first one, he will just walk around any peat bogs that lie on any future straight line mission. He wasn't aware of what it was when he entered the first one.
I just imagine a Norwegian guy walking his pet moose and seeing some dude wading thru the middle of a peat bog with a clear way round it on either side, then hearing his British accent going “This is just porridge” 😂
Did you mean "pet møøse"? 😁
OMG this comment is gold
The absurdity of the situations created by Tom in these videos is nothing but art hahaha
This comment combined with my allergies made me snot my keyboard quite thoroughly
"hva faen?"
The funny thing is you could have drawn a line 10 meters to the north or south and lived a completely different adventure while still being in the same places
Exactly, that's the wonderful thing about it.
The scary thing is that if he would've drawn the line only 2 meters to the left, the bog situation may have been fatal
And just think of how many meters there are in the world. That's life.
@@Terdmissle9 And five meters to the right he would probably have gotten around it, underestimated the next (big) bog and actually got stuck/died...
@@vigilantcosmicpenguin8721 deep 🤣🤣
Passed about 50 meters from my house, mate! Grew up on that football field. So awesome to see you act so cautions around the same houses Ive run around all my life. The last two red houses you went past is my childhoods friends house and his grandparents house! A delight to watch! Should have known you went here and would have been there to greet you!
Would the local people in the houses be angry at seeing someone run through their gardens ? I'm thinking they'd be more likely to be a bit confused ?
thats amazing
@@DavySpikeMill Nah i don’t think they would care. I live 50-60 kilometers farther south and i have walked through plenty of gardens in my life and no one cared. I imagine it helps being a grown man with hiking equipment too.
Ooooh thank you for posting, I always hope some local recognizes him and comments! Very beautiful country, by the way, reminded me a little of mine (Canada). Especially the huge mosquitoes.
@@vegardpig8634 I disagree. It's pretty rude
Geowizard: GET IN
Also Geowizard: GET OUT
LMAO
I laughed at this harder than I should have.
2 years later, that peat bog bit still gives me the chills. I can hear the panic in your voice. That must have been terrifying
Same here, just rewatching this series and Jesus... When he’s grasping for the grass I’m still praying he won’t go in face first, absolute nightmare material.
“The best thing about exploring areas like this is you feel like it’s yours, you own it, like you’ve conquered it.”
How British of you to say that.
Ha ha I thought exactly the same. You can take the man out of Britain...
This explains a lot 😂
33:58 "I let England down" Don't worry, they let us all down every 4 years.
At least your clubs are good, while your country may let you down every 4 years my club let me down almost every year
@@marcelo497 Three Lions originally was 30 years of hurt, now it's almost 50.
The saddest thing about that is you could be talking about literally any English sports team and be right
@@marcelo497 acabamos de ganhar copa América, olimpíadas, copa das confederações. Ainda temos 5 copas e eles só tem uma. Relaxa aí po
@@hc6576 I mean first off the English football team isn’t that bad sure we don’t win but that doesn’t mean we are bad also the English rugby team is phenomenal we always do very well in rugby and cricket idk tbh
Is it just me who thinks he's a comedic genius, bloody hilarious
He is fantastic. This should become kind of a Netflix Show with him doing geo-related stuff. Success guaranteed.
rodney wilson
*Only eats sugary jelly candies*
“Why is my stomach hurting?
And mouldy rotten beef
And takes sips from random bodies of water
Second attempt he picked up gloves, third attempt he brought a helmet. He'll get round to sorting out food by the six or seventh mission I reckon.
@That Fat Guy From GTA SA No they can contain bacteria that can make you sick. But it is usually pretty nice to drink.
@That Fat Guy From GTA SA Yep, but I am from Norway and some people say i can drink it easily and others say differently and that they’ve had bad experiences with it.
You hitting the post twice was actually perfectly fitting for England really.
the good thing about dying in a peat bog is that you'll be perfectly preserved for future generations to see you in a museum and marvel at & wonder how you managed to die in such a small bog... "Why didn't he just walk around it?" "He must have been one of the first believers of the straight line religion!" "All hail the Wizard of Straightlineus!"
I'm 3 years late, but damn this comment was funny!
2010 Pop culture: Avril Lavigne
2020: Evil Ravine
Why'd it have to go and make the trip so complicated?
666 likes💀
@@dianbarkhuizen3648 777 now
As a kid I had an irrational fear of being swallowed up alive by the Earth in a quicksand type scenario. It's no longer irrational. Cheers mate
You'll be safe in quicksand. Peat bogs are easily avoidable, so don't worry
Quicksand and peat bogs don't draw you in deeper. You can't physically sink in sand or in mud. The only way you're going to drown in it is if you push yourself in deeper. Remember that it's easier to push your foot down than it is to pull it out. Use your upper body to get out.
And another thing that is worth remembering: It's not the quicksand that kills people. It's the tide coming in that catches them stuck in quicksand.
The human body is buoyant enough to float on water. The density of swamps and quicksand are a lot higher than that of water, which means that you can not even sink in, unless you push yourself into it, like was mentioned above.
www.nationalgeographic.com/news/2005/9/quicksand-science-why-it-traps-how-to-escape/
Think I need to point out that I really wasn't being serious before all the science teachers reply ;-)
"I feel like I almost conquered it"
**Zooms aggressively to union jack on jacket**
**Imperialism intensifies**
He succeeded what Churchill failed to do.
The British Empire in the 17th century:
6:25
😂😂
*British Empire in their entire existence
This comment is underrated
@@keikei2942 we learned it from our parents, the roman empire 😉
Best comment
You got this homeless guy in full camo walking out of the woods going “ hey kids” lmao
They probably thought he was in the military.
@@shaileshshadadcharan8384 no they probably thought he was walking across norway in a straight line, like any rational adult would immediately think
@@shaileshshadadcharan8384 Norwegian militairy dude speaking perfect english?
It is sad there are so many child predators, makes something completely innocent like this so awkward.
@@TTaiiLs TBH, not that far-fetched, what with all the NATO exercises and other joint/special-training done in the Nordic/Arctic. Tho rarely military goes on trail without any sort of service weapon..
I just adore that he was more upset about the missed goal than the time he nearly died
thats tom for you
Priorities.
I am from notway and the most dangerous ting he did was not climbing. It vas the puddle in the swamp
Those were some good kicks
i wouldn't say nearly died but yeah that was probably the most dangerous part of the trip
5000 years from now - "well preserved human body found in a peat bog in Norway"
Maybe Ötzi was doing a straight line mission as well 🤔
Hell, people probably drown in those every day. What I'm questioning is why didn't he throw a rock or put a long stick in it?
@@AlittleTooClose He's simply different🥶😈
With a mystic amulet with the inscription “GoPro”
@@gorankrajnovic “Its widely believed that GoPro was one of those they called God in that era. Along with Netflix and Instagram.”
"after removing centuries of peat from my ankles I said goodbye to the wretched bog..."
"fuck you."
love it hahahahhaa
Next: I attempted to cross NORWAY in a completely perfect sine wave
No tangent
How about a hyperbola?
Nah, now is South to North. Either Noway or Chile
lol
"I attempted to cross Canada by writing 'Ice Hockey Sucks' with my path line"
Imagine at the end he was just like "Alright, time to go back now" and just started walking back into the woods lmao
There and back again challenge!
OMG
HAAA
Lol kinda like the wildebeest running from one side of Africa to the coastline on the other ...."fuck, wrong way lads ! about-turn !"
The bog is calling me
''Time to go and get the kayak''
Next in line: "I attempted to cross RUSSIA in a completely straight line."
Yeah, probably through Kaliningrad
From the Russian/Norwegian border to the Russian/North Korean border :p
Horizontally...
Content for years
and after that, "I attempted to circumnavigate the earth on the equator in a completely straight line"
Geowizard: Sees *ghastly* bog
Also Geowizard: Get in
i can just imagine those kids on the footballpitch were really impressed thinking you were trying to hit the post/bar twice in a row xD
It IS way more impressive to hit the bar twice in a row, than a huge goal. Even if that wasn't the intention 😃
Imagine the stories when they got home to their parents. 'You won't believe what happened today at training, some English speaking bloke just ran across our pitch dressed in army gear and hit the bar twice'.
Tbh he should've just played it off that he was going for the post lol
33:54 looks like the ball might have actually scored in the side goal
The fact an unmarked obstacle ends up giving you more bother than most of the ones you'd planned is just classic GeoWizard! Loved the series and looking forward to future ones!
How is your comment two days old when the video was uploaded today, was it a reupload ?
@@onefecker4820 Patreons can watch these 2 days early
Moral of the story: Never ignore what the prepared intelligence brief tells you.
Isn't that how life works... ?
The things you plan for are easy.. The things you don't and aren't expecting are things that typically give you trouble?
Is it honestly hard to imagine that he had more trouble dealing with an obstacle he didn't know was going to be there when compared to ones that he knew were going to be there?
@@Gulliedoutbigup and things never go according to plan
Now if you had chose a slightly different route you definitely would have reached the Finnish line
Underrated comment!
leave, get out, never make that pun ever again you fiend
Nice pun there...😂😂
ehehehehehe
The pun so good I questioned if it was intentional.
Tom, this video is 2 years old. I've seen it many times now. But every single time I watch you make that peat bog crossing I cannot help but tense up it's truly horrifying.
He was so lucky that the bank was just about in reach by the time he got really stuck. If it had been a bit bigger he would have probably been a goner
I'm happy you decided to document the trip my dad had to take to get to school every day.
Wow ur dad had it easy, mine had to hike through two countries
@@NegativeAccelerate My grandma had to walk through a world war 2 battlefield
@@WaluigiLebron well my granny actually had to swim across the Atlantic Ocean every morning
@@NegativeAccelerate Amateurs! My grandma had to build her own spaceship before she even could go to school!
We call those "synkemyr" in Norwegian, literally sinking bog. We are taught from an early age that it is easy to die in one of those. They can be many metres deep.
Same here in Finland
I love how similar Scandinavian languages are to English. "synkemyr" sounds like "sink mire" to me. Which is an accurate English description since it is a mire (bog) that you sink in.
@@Xezlec Yeah we’ve taken a lot of Words from each other
@@Xezlec The word husband is also taken from the scandinavian languages, I believe. A long time ago when they were more "crude".
@@lynxplayz8474 House band, perhaps?
Bear Grylls saved your life. You did the right thing by doing forward strokes with your arms and pulling your weight that way instead of trying to push on with your legs. That was a close call my man. Great job on the entire journey.
In this scenario he did the right thing, but if you are not close to something to reach for, you should float on your back instead of leaning forward.
@Bernardo 13:20
Just imagine you're 8 years old in rural Norway, practicing with your local football team, when some camo-wearing, mud-caked maniac with a swarm of flies in tow runs through your pitch and demands a retry on a pointless goal kick, only to miss again and run off into the woods again without even kicking the ball back. lmao
If only you had heard of the Norwegian monster that we call “Nøkken”, he’s a good reason to stay away from swamps in the woods;)
He IS the monster
holy hell yall need to google this that thing is absolutely terrifying looking😂
If you hear his violin, you're most likely done for.
i regret googling that
If you're asked to cross a peat bog, just say NIX
"At this point I was beginning to smell the victory"
**BIG SNIFF**
Solid editing haha (@ 20:00)
Ha! I loved that. Glad I wasn’t the only one who noticed that ingenious piece of editing
I laughed
haha the voice over was brilliant done this series, i also liked @15:10 “...I said goodbye to the wretched bog.” *”FUCK YOU”*
@@gabewrsewell That one is great aswell xD
Jelly babies and mouldy beef jerky, sounds like a solid diet for a long trek
Somehow that's still heartier than what I usually eat.
Fun fact, that's the path my dad took to school every day.
I thought it was uphill both ways?
@@Ragatokk In the snow.
@@firesurfer And He went straight through every peat bog
@@Etherbeats90210 and he walked in darkness in the middle of the night...and was never late for school.
So did mine, but he vanished in the peat bog. Told me he was going to get cigarettes and he just vanished.
"Oooh, that's so scary. "
Yeah, that was close to death. People still die in peat bogs these days, even if they know what they are.
The moment he threw away the GPS I was thinking, if you are stuck you could have at least used that and your phone to give them your exact position at least! What are pockets for anyway?
The scariest thing is that the bog swallows your body and you are never found.
" _a steep cliff? pff, it means nothing_ "
" _a pud of mud? pff, it means nothing_ "
" _A GARDEN?!?! frick..._ "
Lmao
Ah yes, the impassable geographic accident also known as p r i v a t e p r o p e r t y
There's nothing worse than encountering a *W* *E* *L* *S* *H* *F* *A* *R* *M* *O* *W* *N* *E* *R*
@@sergioabrb The sounds of those dreaded quadbikes behind the next hedgerow...
My favourite line: "what sort of strategy are you employing?" said to a midge, while sitting slumped over on the floor, caning a bag of jelly babies.
Love it, love everything about it.
15:10 the only valid way to address the bog you just nearly died in
The best value for money all year has come from being a GeoWizard patron. What a bloody legendary adventure. Worth every cent!
How u a day ago when this vid just been posted 1 hour ago
@@ryantaylor841 patrons get to watch early
The preview from last episode was actually what prompted me to cancel my Patreon membership. He was so close to death here - I don't want to be responsible for encouraging him to take these kinds of risks, no matter how entertaining it is.
Wait, this came out early? On patreon?
How much is it?
- Have you seen this man in military my CCTV cameras filmed?
- Yeah, he missed two shots with a football and then kept going that way.
Headlines in Norway: *Sugar-fueled swamp monster spotted in the fjords. Caution!*
*british
He actually made the news in Norway: www.nrk.no/nordland/youtuber-tom-geowizard-davies-ville-krysse-norge-i-en-rett-linje-i-rana_-var-ikke-godt-nok-forberedt-1.15293567
@@ximono damn thats crazy
as a norwegian i was about to have an anxiety attack from the moment you decided to enter the peat bog. there's a reason our ancestors used those bogs to sacrifice to the gods. they're more powerful than us. im so stressed out now lol
Watch out, or Nøkken will get you!
But yea theyre so dangerous, 1. rule i heard when i was young was how bad bogs are. (I live and grew up out in the country side.)
I suppose that’s why tales about creatures like Nøkken are so widespread, to scare kids and make them weary of the marshes and bogs 😅
It seems like all countries have some form of tale similar to yours
We have them in the UK too, I’m surprised Tom wasn’t aware how dangerous they are
@@ala0284 The first time I watched this I was yelling at the screen. what a complete numpty. there are some things in life you can't learn the hard way. Tom is so lucky to be alive.
The fence you climbed at the soccerfield, i have peed on that like 3 times
nice
@@timnergaard3831 ZUKOOO BB
Ew, why.
chad
@@nordstjerna2 gotta mark the territory
13:20 This short section makes me feel a bit sick. The genuine panic in his voice, arms raking to grasp something solid but only finding handfuls of slime. No one around to help. Stuff of nightmares!
I was so scared for him
That is literally something every norwegian child is taught to stay the fuck away from... At least was when I was a child. And they sometimes just pop up on you without warning.
The part where he described his struggling at his thighs put it over the top & gave me shivers. I used to think drowning was my worst fear, but I think now it’s getting pulled into a peat bog.
24:10 That water was so clear it didn't even look like the camera was underwater.
Beautiful un-polluted water lol
Fjäll water
AMAZINGNES!!!
Holy shit, dumb me thought there is actually air and only a thin sheet of water flowing, but I think you are right!
I actually thought the water was at the bottom at first
Being norwegian, I can tell you right now that Norway was honoured to have you here to do this. You made even me, that's lived with this kind of nature around my entire life, have a newfound appreciation for it. Thank you so much, glad you were able to get through the trip safely.
Its a stunning country
"that stretches all the way to the finish line"
Excuse me, I believe you mean the swedish line
As a Finn this cracks me up.
@@nicostenfors5690 perkele
Good stuff.
@@nicostenfors5690 Kimi Raikkonen
I hate you so much right now
Wizard: "Pristine waters of the fjord"
Poisonous fjord full of mining sludge: " u wot mate?"
"It's only a bit salty"
That part I didn't understand. If he crossed Norway, he ended up on the coast of the Norwegian Sea. Why could he drink it and only be a bit salty?
@@EspenX probably a river nearby making the water brackish.
Love the taste of that mining sludge.
@@EspenX It was a fjord. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fjord#Freshwater_fjords
WOW! The orangeish berries you came across are cloudberry. It's a dream of mine to find them in the wild, only found in tundra typically. I think the stuff you refer to as grass is swathes of crowberries. Both are delicious.
They are everywhere in Norway.
@@musFuzZ They are very rare in the UK. Lucky you! Cloudberry juice is the best.
Pretty common in Sweden as well.
@@seanjose219 only found in the boggy uplands in the UK right?
they are pretty common in lapland
BBC or anyone, should give you your own show! Imagine that! Your absolutely the pinnacle of entertainment and genuine humanity.
Weird Explorer: spends days chasing fresh cloudberries in Finland
Geowizard: random shots of cloudberries in walking compilation
I'm glad to see there is some overlap in the viewership. I haven't watched Weird Explorer's cloudberry video just yet but I added it to watch later (and saw "most elusive fruit" in the title) and was definitely thinking about it when Geowizard casually put up shots of it on the screen, haha. I wonder if he knew what it was or just thought it was a cool shot.
I was thinking the exact same thing while watching that part honestly excited to see his vids payed off
Christ, you nearly became a bog body there. Scary shit.
Can you gimme a time stamp please?
@@someoneyoumayknow5637 10:45 to 14:10
Peat bogs are so so dangerous. Avoid at all costs
He probably would have found a way to survive it no matter what happened, based on the relatively small area of the bog pool, I think it’s fairly likely that it might have even been not deep enough to submerge him past his upper chest. If you lay forward or back and minimize your surface area you can easily prevent any further sinking, not to mention that many bog bodies recovered had an ulterior cause of death recordable, and were simply dumped there as a hiding spot. But still they are vary dangerous and certainly a risk of death.
@@lanceanthony198 he was almost literally in over is head but fair play to him
This has got to be one of the most creative, interesting, engaging and awe-inspiring series on not just TH-cam, but any form of media. Insanely fun to watch! Thanks for sharing, and stay safe my man.
This needs to be some netflix or youtube red thing in the future!
Absolutely. "The most creative is the most personal" someone said one time and this is just that. Pure and perfect stuff
"The more progress you make the closer you get to the end"
Ah yes, the floor here is made out of floor
[Screams in Norwegian as the narrator steps into tHAT BOG]
Jesus Christ...never have I shouted at my computer mate until I saw you starting off into that peat bog!
As someone who grew up in a bog region and was traumatised with stories of bog mummies from a very young age, your preview footage of this bog already had me _highly_ worried, and watching the real thing had me _high-key_ panicking. :'D
The fact that you were obviously alive to tell the tale was a small comfort, but oh geez...
Bogs are incredibly dangerous.
If you struggle, they only pull you deeper. This is such a deeply-rooted fact of life for me that I never even stopped to consider that other people might not know it :'DD
I'm _really_ glad that you made it out of there alive!
I live basically where this guy is from and I know what quicksand is. I can't believe he didn't realise it tbh. No shade on him, but I do worry about some of his lack of foresight
Yeah I was super worried as well. Grew up in Norway and I had it drilled into my head not to mess with bogs, and I didn't even live in a boggy area. Obviously he was fine since we have the video, but I was freaking out a bit during that part. Those things can swallow you whole.
It's frustrating too because even before that he knew he had already gone farther off the line than walking around the edge of the bog would have taken him.
"I've let England down" nah mate you're performance was pretty accurate to England's 😂
Yeah remember when Iceland defeated England back in 2016 xd
@@opethium647 professional footballers earning millions of £ each year losing to a dentist and his friends. One of my favorite moments in the history of mankind.
Verity, what a legend though! you've got yourself a true keeper there. She's brillaint.
He doesn't need a keeper, his shots are never on target
@@M0jibake lol, gg
@@M0jibake You deserve a medal
I loved Verity's hesitant hug when she saw the state of you
or a Hawaiian Island.
"I've let England down" and "Maybe I shouldn't have picked such dated footballer names" had me feel the pain, great job on the rest though!!!
As a Norwegian, it's really scary but at the same time hilarious watching GW wade into the bog oblivious of the danger.
I'm so glad that you didn't title this as "NEARLY DIED IN A BOG" even though it wouldn't be clickbait. Great series mate