@@georgiaoliviia I don't disagree with you. My point was, Is robbing a bank to feed one's family a different crime than robbing a bank out of personal greed? they are two different conversations in terms of causality and I do believe the hungry parent should be treated according to their circumstances but they are both guilty of the same crime.
@@Scientology-The-Big-Lie it’s not the same then, if you rob bread for greed makes you cold and evil like the narcissist if you’re scared of getting hurt to the same as being poor it’s different things I’ve been hurt and it’s important to see they’re two different things avoident don’t get off hurting you. If people don’t understand the basic they shouldn’t comment they can be hurting but in order to heal need to see them for two different things it’s like saying murder and self defence r the same it’s not
My narcissistic husband needs to be validated, admired. He worships his fake muscles, his money, his looks exetera. He is very controlling. He always talks negative about people, but finds bo flaws in himself. He hates when the attention is not in him, but on someone or something else. You have described my husband. He bought me a perune and tokd me thatbhe bought it because he wanted me to feel good about myself. He hates getting old, but guess what we are all getting old. The difference between me and him is that i want to grow old gracefully. My husband is filled with darkness. I am in the process of leaving him because i have lost myself just to make him feel good and nothing i do is good because he is always right. He cannot accept criticism, but he critisizes everyone and everything
let’s talk about how you can turn from an anxious attacher into an avoidant after being in a long term relationship with a narcissist. that relationship plants a fear in you that will literally have you avoiding healthy relationships out of fear of being manipulated again
I don't look at it as fear and maybe I am wrong about that...... It's just common sense. My ex and myself both came from psycho crazy families and we were doomed when we married in ignorance. I have yet to meet any potential partner that has any self awareness. And by that I mean they run the gambit of MESSED UP, SOCIOPATH, POSSIBLE SERIAL KILLER, PATHOLOGICAL LIAR, SEX ADDICT, BROKE DEADBEAT, to we just have nothing in common to there's no spark. So, I don't have any reason to believe that I will meet anyone who is suitable. I will say I definitely fear trying to trust anyone about finances. I have too much to lose
So true, I've found narcs enjoy confrontation, whilst DA's avoid it like the plague, (and the label 'dismissive' avoidant looks bad, but there's a context for that too)
I've delt with both narcissists and DAs my entire life. Avoidants are not always "far from" narcissists unless it's an uncomplicated DA style minus any other problematic layer, such as another personality disorder, e.g. antagonistically presenting BPD or OCPD. The three DAs I had in my inner circle were all on different levels. The one closest to me has been downright evil. Another isn't really a good person but isn't a bad person either. And the third is a sweetheart with a broken soul. He is the only one far from a narcissist. The other two can be mean and one of them deeply disturbs my spirit. I try to avoid them as much as possible.
Depends on the type of narcissist, i think, but generally they're after new emotional supply, use up and discard, draw the person back and repeat, moving on and coming back until someone sees what they're up to.
Labels don’t matter. All that matters is behavior.
Most important thing yes
100%
It does matter, one is evil and selfish and one is from fear of getting hurt you can’t compare it.
@@georgiaoliviia I don't disagree with you. My point was, Is robbing a bank to feed one's family a different crime than robbing a bank out of personal greed? they are two different conversations in terms of causality and I do believe the hungry parent should be treated according to their circumstances but they are both guilty of the same crime.
@@Scientology-The-Big-Lie it’s not the same then, if you rob bread for greed makes you cold and evil like the narcissist if you’re scared of getting hurt to the same as being poor it’s different things I’ve been hurt and it’s important to see they’re two different things avoident don’t get off hurting you. If people don’t understand the basic they shouldn’t comment they can be hurting but in order to heal need to see them for two different things it’s like saying murder and self defence r the same it’s not
Lack of empathy and so very distant...cold as ice.
My narcissistic husband needs to be validated, admired. He worships his fake muscles, his money, his looks exetera. He is very controlling. He always talks negative about people, but finds bo flaws in himself. He hates when the attention is not in him, but on someone or something else. You have described my husband. He bought me a perune and tokd me thatbhe bought it because he wanted me to feel good about myself. He hates getting old, but guess what we are all getting old. The difference between me and him is that i want to grow old gracefully. My husband is filled with darkness. I am in the process of leaving him because i have lost myself just to make him feel good and nothing i do is good because he is always right. He cannot accept criticism, but he critisizes everyone and everything
let’s talk about how you can turn from an anxious attacher into an avoidant after being in a long term relationship with a narcissist. that relationship plants a fear in you that will literally have you avoiding healthy relationships out of fear of being manipulated again
Yes
I don't look at it as fear and maybe I am wrong about that......
It's just common sense. My ex and myself both came from psycho crazy families and we were doomed when we married in ignorance.
I have yet to meet any potential partner that has any self awareness. And by that I mean they run the gambit of MESSED UP, SOCIOPATH, POSSIBLE SERIAL KILLER, PATHOLOGICAL LIAR, SEX ADDICT, BROKE DEADBEAT, to we just have nothing in common to there's no spark.
So, I don't have any reason to believe that I will meet anyone who is suitable.
I will say I definitely fear trying to trust anyone about finances. I have too much to lose
Absolutely my experience!
True, it's me now. I became avoidant and emotionally numb
Ohhhh great topic!!!👏👏👏
My ex never admitted his mistakes fault and bad behavior everything blames on me and he said I'm crazy.
If she knows the harm they are causing, and don't do nothing about: THEY'RE NARCISIST.
Are there any men out there who AREN’T either Narcs or DA’s? Just asking for a friend….
So true, I've found narcs enjoy confrontation, whilst DA's avoid it like the plague, (and the label 'dismissive' avoidant looks bad, but there's a context for that too)
I've delt with both narcissists and DAs my entire life. Avoidants are not always "far from" narcissists unless it's an uncomplicated DA style minus any other problematic layer, such as another personality disorder, e.g. antagonistically presenting BPD or OCPD. The three DAs I had in my inner circle were all on different levels. The one closest to me has been downright evil. Another isn't really a good person but isn't a bad person either. And the third is a sweetheart with a broken soul. He is the only one far from a narcissist. The other two can be mean and one of them deeply disturbs my spirit. I try to avoid them as much as possible.
Very helpful! Thank you.
How do i know if he has another woman/ Supply if i can't see him cuz long distance?? How do you know if he doesn't tell me??
Thank you!
I have been both.My bad.
Brilliant explanation. Where can I find your bio? I might be interested in the course
Very good videos! Thank you! Where is your bio?
Can a narcissist stays loyal to his spouse by any chance ?
Depends on the type of narcissist, i think, but generally they're after new emotional supply, use up and discard, draw the person back and repeat, moving on and coming back until someone sees what they're up to.
No
Is it possible to be both?
Yes!!!
@@danielgray2872 aren’t I the lucky one then? Good thing he’s on his way out. Not before wreaking havoc for 20 years though.