Great vid! Adhd tip: watch at 1.5 speed. Helps digest video better. Watched twice on regular speed but soothing voices always cause me to drift off Edit: I’m happy this could help so many. Thank you all.
Just wanted to point out as someone with predominantly inattentive ADHD, that almost nothing you described about ADHD applies to our subtype. We are decidedly not 'go go go' and we tend not to have all these problems you describe that make us difficult for others which is why we often go undiagnosed. This made me realize that that's similar to the discouraged and self-destructive borderline types which often go undiagnosed because they cause fewer obvious problems for others.
It's interesting how in both cases of ADHD and BPD which are so very different, that there can be such different presentations caused by the same underlying issue.
@@georgewolfe2963 The underlying issues are different. That is what he means by core content. What drives BPD and what causes ADHD are separate and different. He is differentiating how impulsivity shows up in ADHD and how it shows up in BPD. In fact, almost this entire video is differentiating the two because the term "impulsivity" shows up very differently in ADHD than it does in BPD.
I have both. The inattentiveness is 100% adhd. The mood swings, distrust of people/insecurity in my close friendships is BPD. Feeling worthless is BPD. Believing that anyone you care deeply about will leave is BPD. ADHD with RSD sound a whole lot like BPD though. I don’t have any of the episodes of rage/violence typically associated with BPD, though. I guess I’m on the low end of the spectrum, but the emotional dysregulation I experience only when triggered and I know most of them enough now to pull out my DBT tricks. No one who knows me now would ever know. MY adhd stuff I can’t hid though. My brain is a mess 😩
well, it's like you're reading my brain here except i dont know quite as much about myself as you do.. all i know is i've been diagnosed with both at different points in my life.. i've not had the opportunity to get into dbt yet as i am now without access to healthcare, but im getting a dbt workbook off amazon soon.
I was surprised you focused on the impulsivity and motor-driving overlap instead of the overlap between RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria) in those with ADHD and extreme sensitivity to rejection and abandonment in those with BPD. But after watching the video, I really appreciated your choice of focus, too. The former confusion of symptoms has me really puzzling over why I am so sensitive to being rejected and whether this is due to ADHD or BPD.
Sara Dailey Yes, that is really critical. The overlap of symptoms between GAD and ADHD is another example of this, since stimulants risk exacerbating anxiety. It is essential to get the diagnosis right. From what I gather from Dr. Fox’s videos, BPD benefits more from CBT, DBT and other non-psychiatric treatments, whereas ADHD is directly treatable with stimulant medication. It has been argued ADHD is the most treatable of disorders although potentially disastrous if left untreated. The sensitivity to rejection in both BPD and ADHD is very important for future research to address IMO.
I expected more emphasis on sensitivity and anxiety as well, @Delltron. I also think it’s important to note that one is a personality disorder (often the product of early dysfunctional/traumatic experiences) and the other is neurological. Different means to similar ends, I suppose. My boyfriend reps the BPD, and I’m the one with ADHD. It can be a WILD ride, let me tell ya... 🤦🏼♀️
My BPD prevents me from social intrusiveness, although I have severe ADHD. It’s the fear of rejection and The chronic feeling of being a bother or being invisible, but once I speak, I speak very excessively and so fast! Please make a video about how a comorbid condition can change how other one symptoms and how it manifests itself. I’ve self-diagnosed myself lately with BPD because I’ve never been in a physical fight and rarely screamed at people, so I thought I didn’t fit the diagnosis until I learned about the quiet type. And symptoms are like describing every moment of my life and every cell of my personality. I just thought that was me! I didn’t realize that it was a personality pattern. Such a revelation, but now after noticing that emotional distortion, I cannot trust my feelings anymore and I can’t tell when it’s really a negative situation and if somebody is trying to hurt my feeling on purpose. When I’m splitting and when it’s true that somebody has changed? How could we tell? I’m confused. We can’t be always reading through things and overreacting, right? I think it’s reasonable to think that sometimes our fear has a merit of truth? Mean people exist and humans change. Sometimes it’s good to take a hint to judge and filter people in your circle. It can’t be always hypersensitivity? Thank you for all the videos.
I was misdiagnosed as having BPD when in fact it was just ADHD with severe inattentiveness, a high intelligence with a lack of motivation due to understimulation and autism. I displayed some signs commonly associated with bpd, but their origin was very different and I never had a fear of anyone leaving me. I value others' right to personal space, yet can say I've met a lot of supposedly normal people (mainly men) who did not. I've had a lot of people who thought I liked them because I'm quite nice and caring toward most people, because that's part of the non-western culture I grew up in but also because my autism rendered me incapable of knowing what would be an appropriate level of kindness to show to others. I'd end up no longer seeing those people because I just did not like them back, nor did I want to see them as often as they would want to see me. They labeled me as having "unstable relationships", when I didn't consider those to have been relationships/friendships. I developed "mild" bulimia with only subjective binges after a prolonged period of being anorexic, which isn't all that uncommon. They said bulimia was a clear sign I had BPD. I'm extremely concise in how I analyse myself and things outside of me, meaning I don't just swallow any theory about me or anything else people try to sell me. I'll look for good reasons as to why I should believe A vs B. I'll criticize people for saying something that's not true or something that people simply can't know, especially mental health professionals, becauce if they want to give the impression they're experts on something, they should be accurate. They called that defiant, when all I wanted was to uncover the truth about why I was struggling so I could receive the right treatment. In hindsight, I had extremely obvious signs of adhd and autism. They told me I simply didn't want to achieve anything in life. What I'm trying to say by all of this: encountering an actually competent mental health professional isn't all that easy, and just because people thought you had BPD, does not mean you have it. Anyway, doctor. I know the area of personality disorders is your area of expertise, but could you post videos on autism (maybe as a differential diagnosis) or a more elaborate one on ADHD? I'm very curious to find out what you'd have to say about those conditions.
This is my favorite comment on this thread! I actually do have both ADHD and BPD, but I am exactly like you, in the way I know exactly which parts are the ADHD, which are BPD, and the symptoms that are from both. I've lived my whole life so far thinking I was crazy...even WITH the BPD dx since I was 15. I have seen a crap ton of professionals who have agreed to BPD, they've all added: depression, anxiety, PTSD/C-PTSD, and no one mentioned ADHD until this year!!!???? I'm 32!!! It explains everything that didn't make sense with the rest of the disorders. I could put substance abuse disorder up there too, except that's a misdiagnosis, I believe, because I feel like it was more self medication, which makes sense with the ADHD! I really would like a more in depth video about all of this!! Although I'm not complaining. You may be the only person who I feel actually understands and we are so lucky to have your videos!! Thank you for what you do.
This is wonderful information. I was dx BPD over 40 years ago, All of our children and my husband are ADHD or ADD, one with Asperger, our Granddaughter ADD, Grandson Autistic. The descriptions given here are so accurate. In fact in one class I got told to leave because I was clicking my BIC CLICK PEN! I changed teachers because I couldn't deal with the embarrassment, I didn't even realize I was doing it. Worry is my middle name has been since a small child. I want to scream this information from the hilltops, people are so uncomfortable and uninformed about these real conditions so you just get avoided..... Didn't ask for these.... Like others don't ask for their life altering conditions. Thank you Dr. Fox for putting this out there. Truly compassionate human being you are.
Every person is responsible for their own responsibilities. Nobody owes you anything. Moreover, why should anybody want to be close to you and suddenly get attacked with no reason.
Hi Dr. Daniel - thank you so much for this video! I've gone for so long thinking there was something "wrong" with me in the sense that I could relate to the feeling of restlessness described in ADHD - but never really fit the criterias. I sought help one year ago and was recently diagnosed with BPD - and suddently everything made sense. When I'm not triggered I can focus and relax - however, when I'm in emotional turmoil I'm an impulsive restless mess. This was so helpfull to watch - especially also since my partner is diagnosed with ADHD. It helped me put in to words the different sense of restlessness that I so often feel that we have. He's always like "yes I know the feel" and YES, I know that he knows - but on another level. I'm definately gonna watch this together with him as well - so that he might have a better understanding of the difference. I'm sorry if I repeat myself in this comment, but sometimes when I write - especially when its not in my first language - I get lost. Thank you so much - your videos help me a lot between my sessions with my therapist. I'm starting DBT tomorrow - I'm so scared, but I feel motivated to learn new strategies to ease my BPD. Lots of love from Norway!
I have never heard a better description of what my BPD programming feels like. Although it may seem silly, the coffee pot analogy was perfect. This was so comforting to hear because I didnt realize other people felt like that, too. I look forward to the video about slowing down. Thank you for your videos, Dr. Fox!
Dr. Fox. Thank you for giving me the insight I need to learn as much as I can on BPD/ADHD. I struggle and suffer everyday with my symptoms. Unfortunately I have been unsuccessful in finding a psychiatrist that has a true understanding of how Complex childhood trauma, BPD, ADHD, PTSD, and social anxiety can cause so much suffering. I don't know where to go with this, I just wish there were more dr's whom understand the difficulty of these very intense conditions. Your videos help out ALOT. Thank you!
I think it would also be helpful for this video, to also note that there is also ‘Inattentive’ type of ADHD. Because, as someone with BPD and also someone who is looking at being assessed for ADHD, I feel I’m more inattentive than hyperactive. I think to look at where the overlap is between inattentive adhd and BPD and what inattentive adhd core content would look like. Thanks for the video ☺️
And girls and women present differently, and if intelligent usually learn go-arounds and other coping strategies. Hormones also play a huge role. Then there is medical misogyny, where you are much more likely to be diagnosed with mood disorders and/or personality disorders, and have adhd, autism and/or trauma be what's really going on. I'd recommend Dr. Russell Barkley's youtube vids; he is top of the field in adhd research, and says that emotional dysregulation, which he calls DESR, or "deficient emotional self regulation," is always a core feature of ADHD and ought to be included in the diagnostic criteria.
I'm mixed. Or I think now is called complex. I'm a female. I USED to have that outwardly I obvious, leg bouncing, blurt out the answer in grade school. In junior high I would knit or draw or twirl my pen to help me concentrate. When especially make teachers scream at.you "sit still" and there aren't any other girls in class who can't mask then you sit still...but space out because your teacher is talking SO slow.
a year late, but thank you SO much for this video. i was diagnosed with ADHD last year, and recently i’ve begun to suspect i may have BPD- most if not all of the symptoms add up for me, but it’s so hard to figure out what’s ADHD and what could be BPD. what you said about anxiousness and fearfulness made so much sense to me.
My anxiousness drives my impulsivity !! Wow! Eye opening. Thank God for you Dr. Fox , you javelin a gift for explaining these things. So my take away is; if I can get my anxieties under control then I will be less impulsive.
My daughter (19) has BPD and more ADD than ADHD (hyperactive element not prevalent)… stimulant calms her anxiety and helps her mood/depression from.BPD. Helps her focus & do better interpersonally with others. It’s like a flipped switch. Only starting to treat the ADD but WOW!! She’s starting to use DBT skills as well. Praying it gives her relief.
This is great! I have many Adhd, Bipolar, BPD, and OCD! This is so helpful they all overlap. Another counselor said D.I.D. but still doubt that. What I love about this.. Is how complex the mind is, these labels really help with all the "controls in the cockpit". The more insight I have, the higher functioning I become.. Thank you for this video.. Would love to hear about transitions in both disorders. I still struggle with that Thank you!
Ehhh DID is... eh. But- there can definitely be elements of dissociation in people with BPD, and even some breaks with reality. When my partner is having a BPD “episode,” I swear, he even looks physically different. Something in his eyes switch and it’s like he’s looking right through me. It’s dissociation.
I of course cant say for certain that i have both without a diagnosis, but i have ADHD and through this video and a couple others i can confidently say i think i have both. All of what's said explains my thoughts and actions almost perfectly, specifically because i know i have both types of impulsivity in my daily life. Thank you very much for being the boot that kicks me in the direction of getting help
I wish you could be my doctor. Your videos always help, you’re really great. I’ve been diagnosed with both and as for impulsivity, I now see at 33 that I’m more the adhd impulsive type, when I used to have both a few years ago. But therapy and self work really helped with bpd impulsivity. 💪🏻 what I love about your videos, contrarily to some other people one YT, is that you always give a sense of control and hope for people with bpd instead of shaming us for being The Worst Thing that ever happened to our friends and families, even if we work super hard to better ourselves. So yeah, thank you for your kindness and empathy too 🖤
Does untreated ADHD in Childhood lead to BPD? I was diagnosed with BPD at age 15 and then ADHD at 18. I only received therapy for depression prior till age 32, but took ADHD meds for a long time. Its very hard for me to relax and I'm always anxious. Its hard for me to focus, remember, pay attention and sit still for long periods unless its a topic I'm really interested in. Its hard for me to read a book, watch a movie, or complete a task in one setting. I'm working with a psychiatrist to try and get ADHD meds (as well as benzos for anxiety), but its difficult.
Yes. That's me. Keep in mind I come from a 3rd world toxic masculinity and religios country. So as a child I was always just the weird kid. Now I'm 26 and a year ago with severe sweeting, and lose of all self control and inability to do anything productive. I have Both ADHD and BPD. And a sorta conformation from my sessions, that my mom also has if not same diagnosis then another personality disorder.
Personally, I’ve read that it’s more linked with untreated or unmanaged Reactive Attachment Disorder in childhood that then can progress into BPD as we know it. However I am also not a psychologist. I just have BPD and did a tonne of research to understand myself better. Hope this helps
I'd say it's more of a correlation than causation. BPD is often caused by emotional abuse and neglect in childhood, which would also include things like medical neglect and under-diagnosing
Thank you so much for your videos. :) I have ADHD and BPD, along with bipolar 2, depression, anxiety, PTSD, partial complex seizures in the inner cortex of my brain, and generalized mood disorder. I've been told by a professional that they thought I've been over diagnosed. I recently have been exposed to information about aspbergers/autism in women and that ASD can overlap with BPD and ADHD. I feel a diagnosis of ASD would explain (not exaggerating) nearly all of my symptoms I've been experiencing since my childhood. I've spent literally over half of my life in and out of talk therapy, medicating, lifestyle changes, etc. to behave out of alignment with my internal experience and more in alignment with my values and adaptive behaviors, but I do still experience those symptoms that coincide with ASD. I believe that I have BPD and ADHD as well- as diagnosed by professionals. I don't assume I am on the spectrum, but I have found it very helpful to learn more about it. I would immensely appreciate if you would make a video about the overlap between autism spectrum disorder and borderline personality disorder. I checked your website and didn't see info about comorbidity between the two, but I'm wondering if you or anyone else could point me in the direction of information you've put out on the subject or if anyone else has resources as well. Thank you so so much!
Brilliant! Thank you Dr Fox you make everything so clear for me. I was diagnosed ADHD 3 years ago and BPD traits 3 months ago... I’m 50yrs old next month so have been suffering with the exact symptoms you describe for a long time! 😰 however, I am very positive about the future 😁 my ADHD medication and coping strategies are beginning to work well to slow me down and I have found that this gives me much hope for my BPD personal recovery 👍🏻 I am on chapter 2 of your workbook, which, combined with your excellent videos, have given me strength, determination and compassionate self-acceptance for who am I am and why this personality developed within me
Could you do a follow-up video discussing rejection sensitive dysphoria in ADHD (whether or not you believe it exists as a standalone phenomenon, or reflects co-occurring BPD)?
I’ve become convinced I have both. That motor sense I definitely engage in and purposely so because that’s when I’m most productive. I’ve found that I only do one of the sabotaging behaviours now but only because my anxiety means that I have learned that when I have the bubbling pot sensation I know only action will make me feel better but that I have to find an action that won’t have a bad consequence.
I've researched both for a long time and undertaken much reflection. I was told by a mental health professional I score highly for BPD but because I have held down a job. I shouldn't pursue it as I would regret it and my self harming wasn't as bad as the severe cases he had seen. I have used Dr Fox's books and worksheets when my BPD (based on that assessment and my own) is bad and it helped. Along with his videos. Which are very comforting, as some videos on BPD. Paint BPD very negatively which makes you feel more depressed. Ive taken various self assessments for ADHD and scored highly. I definitely have a motor that doesn't stop. I have been that hyperfocused that my speech has been impacted by tiredness but I kept working until I was literally struggling to articulate what I was saying. My Child is being assessed and was asked to explain the end point of a visual instruction to follow. We both got lost and could not follow. It was like the assessor was talking fast about words I knew but they felt random and in no recognisable pattern. My brain couldn't process. Same with mathematical formula. My brain feels like it goes in slow motion. But with other things I am very quick at connecting dots. All very confusing. Dr Fox if you ever offer online consultations count me in!
Hey Doctor Fox. Thank you so much for another great video. That´s my combo unfortunately. It´s very difficult - but ADHD mostly affects just memory and focus. To be honest yeah, the feeling goes I can´t get going anymore. I´ve gone 30 years without any help and now I have limited access to help - and yeah, the hopelessness kinda grows. Trying to be strong but squeezed as a lemon. Hoping to be able to get your book soon at least.
Femme Fatale hey girl, thanks for reaching out. Yes, but for me it looks like I need full 8 hrs and less than 50 hrs work I currently have. Exercise does help a LOT and one of workouts I would recommend in particular is Body Combat where you discharge all that negative aggressive energy and it keeps you on tips of your toes literally as well as figuratively: you get tired and you don’t get bored at all while at the same time training your focus cause the choreography is not easy.
SAME-IT GETS WORSE W/AGE FOR ME...MORE DISCONNECTED/NUMB/DEAD AS A DOORNAIL INSIDE/FORGOTTEN/INADEQUATE.......CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHY SUICIDE IS BAD WHEN IT WILL CLEARLY ONLY GOT SO MUCH WORSE,SO MUCH LONELIER.........BPD IS A CURSE FROM GOD...GOD HAS ABANDONED US.
@ Alla Kitaeva I'm almost 70 yrs old, suffering from both of these disorders myself. After all of this time, going to therapist after therapist, I've come to the conclusion that aside from taking meds for bpd and adjusting to the adhd (which you have to do to avoid addiction), realizing 'the only one that can help me is myself, is important'. Dr. Phil says, "What's the payoff, what do you get in return", I thought these were great questions. You have to understand the problem in order to live with it, in fact hon, it'll always be with you, so you need to find productive ways to satisfy the need that's left, you need to get excited about something and let your disorder dive into it.
All my life I felt lonely because I was so different from my peers in so many ways yet so like them in so many others but still never able to fully connect. My symptoms isolated me and getting diagnosed with multiple disorders made me feel even more lonely. Even more like no one will ever see me or my uniqueness in a positive light. I have felt like I was on my own island away from everyone else but close enough to see what I was missing. Finding videos like this that seem tailored to what I thought was my own special brand of disorder is encouraging in breaking that feeling of aloneness. There ARE other people with my similar combination of struggles and there ARE medical professionals who can treat comorbidities like this. Thank you not only for this video but for the work you do in understanding complicated cases to help people like me.
for one who has both i've never found such an accurate video when it comes to describing the difference in the impulsivity aspects but also the aspect of how the panic and anxiety driven face of bpd combines with the impulsive outbursts. It's a blessing and i thank you very much for your much needed videos!
when you started talking about how bpd controls your pessimistic views of the future i felt so related to that. i am always trying to define what that feeling is, and you defined it for me!! thank you!!
I am diagnosed with both ADHD and borderline. My personality disorder developement has got to do with being raised by an autistic mother. My father is narcistic. In my childhood it looked like I was the one with autism and my parents were fine. During my whole childhood I thought everything about me is wrong and I should be gratefull with having 'normal parents' who did their best to take care of me. I am not angry anymore at my parents. I never was angry at my mother, because despite everything I always felt her true love towards me. I don't have contact with my father anymore because of self-protection - if I let him enter into my life again he will eventually start humiliating me on such a subtle way I will realise it afterwards. But it is so lonely. My anger goes mainly towards other people. I cannot blame my mother she doesn't understand me, because she just can't. Other people CHOOSE not to understand me. They let me down and they let my mother down and they will continue doing so, because they are ignorant and they refuse to take me seriously. The psychiatry is developing, however it doesn't matter because on this world nobody will help you. If you are weak then people are not interested in you. I have to deal with extreme procrastination behaviour. I am so used to fail about everything. I am sick and tired of people who say I should think more positively to gain self-esteem. People cannot force developing that by just saying they are fine. It's more important to find out why one has a low self-esteem.
Thank you so much Dr Fox! Please keep putting out your videos. I'm very well-read on the subject of BPD. Most other content on TH-cam is review. Your videos are different. You have an excellent understand of BPD, much more thorough than my therapists seem to be.
I love how easy it is to follow you talking. Not too fast, not too slow...perfect pitch. I am noise sensitive, especially voices and I am impatient so I really enjoyed this video. And you were animated enough to keep me interested, but not overly animated to the point of annoying. I actually sat and listened for about 5 min without getting distracted once.
Can you do a video on paranoia and BPD? I’ve been having a lot of paranoid thoughts and I believe them even if others tell me they aren’t true. I’ve been having a hard time with this lately! Thanks for all your helpful videos!
Try getting more sleep practice mindfulness eat healthy drink more water less sugary drinks deep breathing practice observing your thoughts with emotional detachment . Observe without engaging with them
I have both and I've been diagnosed 3 days ago. Honestly the diagnosis made everything so much brighter to me. I have had problems in school, but I was always able to manage them and help everything on a decent level, which made me literally proud when I got diagnosed, since I didn't hit the exact behavioral criteria for bpd, less for adhd, because of my hard work that I put into being a healthy person towards myself and others. I struggle a lot with inattentiveness, have struggled with addictions, but I've been able to manage them (I don't take anything anymore) and gosh my whole life, every romantic relationship has been a disaster in the end. I'm currently managing even that!!! I feel like I've really worked hard all my life against this diagnosis, not even knowing it was there and always thought about myself in terms of being different, but right now I am aware of just how much effort I've put to it...
@@alouise3557 I become tiring and exhausting, I have a tendency to pass the responsibility for my emotions and my well-being onto my romantic partner. Things that made perfect sense to me, for example I could be super angry at some point and then just casually dissociate and not even remember that, indicating that it wasn’t this much of a deal and I don’t understand why she is shocked or doesn’t understand my behavior. I would plan to do one thing and feel like it very deeply and strongly to just casually forget about it as if I never cared. I would try to fit in the needs of my partner, completely ignoring mine ones and not even being able to see them, then when I found out about them I would struggle communicating them, bursting out with anger at her only to apologize literally 2 seconds after that and say that I didn’t know what was happening with me. Well in the end I end up being a burden, not an autonomous entity, completely reliable on the other person to the point where she’s exhausted. That’s what she told me when she broke up with me. We’re friends now and receiving the diagnosis really helped either her and me understand what was happening. I think the worst thing that would be happening to me were the said outbursts of anger and dissociating afterwards. It made it really difficult to accept the responsibility for the uncontrolled behavior since it really didn’t seem real and didn’t feel like being me during the outbursts. I would apologize and not be able to understand what truly happened with me as I watched my partner still processing the situation from 30 seconds ago that I have struggle remembering and felt like it was not even me who did it.
I agree with everything in this video, coming from a place of ADHD, depression, and severe mood swings (but with any other symptoms of BPD that can't be explained by ADHD), but my lord dr fox you are very handsome please continue to exist I appreciate you, in and out.
Two questions #1 would you agree that consistent despair & giving up on life is a form of self harm like cutting? #2 How would you differentiate between BPD & ADHD once you understand the RSD aspect in ADHD? Thanks a lot.
This is interesting. A few days ago I have found in myself that somehow my extended despair, self-abandonment and giving up on my life seem to me as a way of self harm. It feels like a way punishing myself and my life.
I was officially diagnosed with ADHD.. I had all the tell tale signs but I grew up when ADHD wasn't really a thing and if it was it was a boy thing. I am a BPD, ADHD, PTSD, severe anxiety and depression, and impulse control issue sufferer. It can be so hard. But I have a great therapist and psychiatrist that work with me. And I am leaps and bounds better than even a year ago.
As a kid I was diagnosed with adhd? And for a long time I internalized everything. I attacked myself in my head almost everyday. I was very angry and violent around 11-15 years of age. I get hyperactive too. I’m not so violent now at 17, but when I’m losing people in my life I feel like I’m forced to keep it quiet. I watch how people around me behave I just don’t think it’s safe to tell anyone, no one in my life has acted how I needed them to.
I’d be interested in understanding what comorbid adhd and bpd looks like and how it differs from comorbid bpd and autism, if that’s something you’re open to exploring. It seems to me like the social hindrances of being neurodivergent could contribute substantially to the development of bpd, and there are a lot of overlapping traits that probably influence presentation of each disorder in interesting ways, but I’ve never seen the dynamics covered in much depth.
I'm diagnosed with both. Wow I can't get enough of your videos, your insight is amazing just watching these helps calm and slow me down. Can't wait for the next one😊
This video helped me confirm that I don’t have BPD! I have ADHD and I went to a psychiatrist for the first time and within my half hour of meeting her she diagnosed me with BPD and prescribed me lithium. I’ve been through extremely through phych testing and they found no sign of a mood or personality disorder. I now am on a hunt for another psychiatrist yet again
I feel more confused [about myself] after this video. Hmm. The symptoms sound very similar still. I am a million percent positive that I have ADHD. However, my mother has BPD and I see similar traits (regarding relationships) in myself, but I am outgrowing the need for drama. I still blow up in angry episodes but it is usually related to my poor executive functioning causing anxiety and then someone/something triggers me at the most inopportune moment. Thank you for this video; I have had difficulty finding videos comparing these 2 disorders, even though (in my opinion) they seem to overlap the most (as opposed to other psych disorders).
Could you possibly also make a video about why some people with bpd dont want to grow up? I'm at a very confusing part of my life and will be 20 this thursday, but i dont want to get older and i feel very emotional the closer it gets.
!!!! This is me too, I don’t want to at all but also I wasn’t supposed to exist past 2017, so I didn’t plan further and now I’m like ?? So I keep getting older and I’m supposed to know things and how to exist etc???? Didn’t sign up for it!!! :(
I love your videos, truly.. As a woman who went undiagnosed with adhd until 4 months ago, I need to point out that your description of adhd impulsivity is correct except that the bpd impulsivity content especially substance abuse and spending sprees are also very typical of adhd. I think what you are getting at is where it comes from, bpd more of a bottle up of emotions/anxiety and impulsive reaction vs adhd trait impulsivity, not emotion driven but driven by lack of stimulation. I guess it gets messy because adhd can also be emotionally impulsive. Apparently we have higher trait impulsivity and bpd has higher state impulsivity
Is it possible that they’re just a spectrum of the same thing? Same with procrastinstion and also some narcissistic tendencies they all seem to overlap with BPD in their own ways and ADHD and it’s like, why can’t we just call all of this “emotional dysregulation” or “emotional underdevelopment”
I find it interesting, and beneficial to hear these things ! I had to learn about BPD, 'the very hard way ' , from the backwards forward, from the inside to the out, and not fun by any way one may look at it ! It was only after I had 'gone thru' so much complication in my own life ( due to others's issues), that I happened to find all these great helps !
Adderall + BDP: We know that there is no specific medicine prescribed to treat BPD, but many with ADHD are prescribed stimulants such as Adderall. These stimulants come with many adverse side effects similar to symptoms of BPD, especially anger outbursts and anxiety. The daily come-down from Adderall alone initiates a wave of bad thoughts, stress, emptiness, and impulsivity. How do you work with patients that deal with this combination?
I have both & bipolar. For me, the impulsivity in BPD is trigger-driven, my ADHD is not. Impulsivity in bipolar is always in the manic phase and like you say, it lasts longer, weeks even.
So i did not get my adhd diagnosis as expected. I have all the symptoms and have had them all my life, but my doctor thinks its just the autism i was diagnosed with as a child (theres a lot of autism symptoms i dont have, and the ones i had as a child i think is likely symtoms of my attachment issues to my parents) . I think i might have developed bpd (or at least i have traits of it). I tried taking adhd meds i got from a friend for a week and it reeeeally helped. i became calm (not an emotional rollercoaster as i always usually am) , i still felt the emotions but i could bear them they werent over bearing and i had less impulses to act on them , i had impulse control (!!!) , i was less hyper active and more patient and - the absolute best - I COULD THINK - I didnt have ten tabs open at once in my head but i was present in the moment and could think clearly - i became more productice and less distracted because of this. Can adhd meds have effect on bpd or autism as well ? or is this a sign i might have adhd ?
Great question. I'd thought ADHD stimulant meds would only be be balancing /regulating for ADHD, but I'm intrigued to learn more about the effects on other brains 😊xx
@@anne-louisegoldie I am still think I was misdiagnosed and that really I have ADHD as well as depression and BPD. Coffee makes me calm and Adhd meds real help. And there is just so many signs... Have The BPD diagnosis now and have not been able to get a secondhand opinion on my Adhd diagnos (and they probably Will not give me since I have BPD). But I wisj i could get it.
@@ADevilFromHeaven You should definitely be able to have this conversation. A diagnosis of anything doesn't mean putting blinkers on to the rest of the person's lived experience. 🤗🤗xx
I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid but the way you described impulsivity I probably have BPD too. After 2 years of therapy I m just learning to love myself for who I m. The war with myself is over. 😊
I haven't been sleeping for a week... worried about loosing my family due to my BPD symptoms ... Dr.Fox has been a wonderful help with my ability to communicate my wants/needs/thoughts which eases my thoughts of me being a burden on my wife and causing traumas to my children... and the information he gives helps me to communicate and understand my care providers better
I have a diagnosis of BPD but I think I have ADHD as well. Every time I ask my therapists about it, they won't even entertain it and just shut it down straight away. It's really frustrating.
I have the exact same thing but the other way around! I have ADHD but I think I could have BPD. All mental health professionals think it’s just because I want to have it (which I don’t). I feel your frustrations
Thank you for this video. I was diagnosed with ADHD early on in elementary school, but after really looking into BPD I fit that as well heavily. Always felt it was more than just ADHD, especially due to the dissociation that I've had all my life on and off...but never had a name for the dissociation until the last couple years. You feel crazy Definitely will be going to talk with a professional at some point
I am not 100% sure if I have BPD (I only found out about it today on TH-cam), but I am pretty sure I have some sort of disorder. I just can't seem to figure out what it is I have. However, BPD sounds like what I experience. I don't have the money for a therapist or psychologist and currently I am out of work due to the place I worked at closing. So, doing lots of research is all I have right now. That part about the coffee pot was spot on with my experience. I have a few different impulsive behaviors and when I don't do them, the pressure builds up. I have anxiety and depression often and I act on my impulsive/addictive behaviors to make me feel better, but then I feel worse shortly after and it is a cycle. Thanks for the videos. I have only watched a couple of videos of yours so far, but they are very informative.
Dr. Fox please address whether people with BPD really know that their behaviors/reactions are extreme and out of the norm. Or do they not actually see it? How do you approach a loved one who you believe has BPD if they believe that their behaviors are not abnormal? The angry reactions are so painful to recieve but watching them suffer through life is impossible when you love them. Clearly having knowledge and a proper diagnosis is essential for treatment. Doctors and psychologists often miss the diagnosis because they dont see the extreme emotional dysregulation in a typical 1 hour session. What can a loved one do to help get proper treatment for someone who so desperately needs it?
I found the description of Impulsivity as the driven by a motor feeling to be somewhat inaccurate. I find that is more an aspect of hyperactivity. Impulsivity for us seems to be more on the decision making and planning side. Those executive functions that guide our ability to think out all the steps of something and wait till its time to act
Thank you so much for another extremely enlightening video! I’m so happy when I can read and listen to your explanations. Thank you for putting on screen words to go with your verbal explanations! ❤️ I have such a hard time concentrating and absorbing material. I can go back and listen again and again and hopefully it will sink in! I gave up on antidepressants. I’m on mood stabilizer and Xanax. But I think I need to approach from adhd angle again. Tried one med. made it worse. So I didn’t pursue another choice. I’m early 60’s, and as life and health issues get more complicated, I’m sinking more than treading. You are great to share your knowledge and I love your delivery! All around #10 for me!
That is how I feel. When I think about a relational issue I feel this sense of urgency all the time, I did not know that this is not normal... No wonder my life feels like I am always on a roller coaster.
I'm also wondering what a differential diagnosis would look like for female symptoms of autism+ADHD vs. BPD vs. C-PTSD/PTSD of non-usa and non-uk cultures
I appreciate this. I've been diagnosed with BPD since I was 18, literally. Lately, I've been wondering if I have undiagnosed ADHD, but I can't get a mental health professional to take me seriously (since they think I'm just drug seeking) but this is very informative.
I do have ADHD, I really relate to these traits more than the BPD ones. I think have some traits of BPD but not so so bad, I think it’s my neurodivergent brain who mirrors other peoples actions in these stressful moments because they been learnt from observation. But I’m really reflective on these things afterwards. I’m had been diagnosed with PTSD, with the acknowledgment of it being cPTSD.
Talking about ADHD, you explain it with the observations of behaviour and not in a way that accurately conveys the actual experience/underlying behaviour - e.g. 'unable to wait your turn' is one effect, not the cause or key driver... if at all. I felt that it might be somewhat misleading in that the distinction wasn't clear if you intended to only describe observations or if you were attempting to describe the experience and drivers as well.
omg the anxiety coffee pot explanation is so good! Yes! I can relate so much to all the anxiety and fear being something that makes such a mess for me and sends me into unhealthy behaviours. Also it's so weird, all the people closest to me have ADHD and I have BPD!
I have ADHD and I have a friend with BPD who uses my adhd against to to make me feel lesser than him quite often. I had to stop being his friend because it ended up becoming very unhealthy for me for quite a while, which is very unfortunate.
That’s why they are part of the anti social Cluster B group together with psychopath, narcissist, and histrionics . No contact is the solution according to experts.
What I read is, Borderline is also called failed narcissist+ secondary psychopathy. it’s basically the same quality but on different dimensions or spectrum. Cluster B’s psychopathy, narcissist NPD, borderline BPD and histrionic, they are the same things on a spectrum or different dimension, and they interchange according to different situations and phases.
I would love to know what you think about the borderline and narcissistic couple. It seems that they attract each other in very unhealthy ways. For the Borderline this is hell on earth, and the narcissistic partner is just fine it seems. I love your videos. They are full of hope, patience and love. ❤️
I have both. I’m struggling with it. Really struggling. I was treated for BPD for 30 years with stabilizers and antidepressants but there was a hole in myself I couldn’t figure out. As a kid I had ADD. I assumed when I went full blown BPD at 17 that that was all that I had, so for nearly 30 years I haven’t been treating my extremely bad attention and my inability to get up and do things. It’s almost like depression when you want to do things but can’t. Problem is that now that I’m taking add. I struggle with it with my mood swings, so I have to be _extremely_ careful how I take it. I’ve even learned to break 10 down to 1.5mm which helps me get off my seat, but doesn’t do anything for my inability to keep my attention on things. I’m really struggling here. If I take add. too long, I get extreme burnout. My body has to be finely grounded. I have to watch EVERYTHING. Moon phases affect me, rainy days, days that suddenly get cooler. I have to be careful with what I eat and that I get exercise. It’s a complete tightrope for me or I spiral out of control.
I have both and was diagnosed with ADHD when I was like 7-8 and diagnosed with borderline recently. For years I thought my dissociation was just me zoning out. Learning to separate some of the symptoms
4 years late to this video but I've been trying to make sense of everything. I know I'm adhd, but thought there was always more to it, and I've been looking into bpd because it explains a lot of things that I feel I have to constantly use brain power to monitor what I should or shouldn't do and sometimes even that disappears in anxious situations with too much to focus on. I've never directed anger at someone but it seems to be the worst when I'm driving, or stubbing a toe or accidently hurting myself somehow, or those small instances where you're doing something simple but it doesn't work the first 3-4 times. Get that little outburst of like "OMFG" for a few seconds and then after I scold myself for that little outburst. There's way more but it's not coming to mind.
I have both of these. Also OCD and memory problems with ahantasia. I can't remember any of my past. No memories. I do work on myself daily, build myself up then I get teared down from 100 to 0 multiple times a day. Takes me so long working on myself then go down like a teeter twitter or a roller coaster except stuck at bottom and get less don'e. I really need to talk to you Dr. Fox.
To learn more about this you can check out my book complex personality disorder. I’m sorry but I’m not taking new clients at this time. I wish you all the best.
Of course you'd have videos on this lol it's very validating that one could have a hard time discerning the two .... I have a borderline diagnosis and as a kid had a adhd diagnosis and since then I've been so unsure to even make sure I dint also have adhd .... as I have every hyperactive symptom including the one you stated about interrupting as my partner and I have noticed I start talking before I even enter the room and interrupted him Watching a show or reading ect ..... but I also have the anxious issues where I'm impulsive do to in the moment things like when I shot up meth for the sec time I went to hook up with someone not planing for meth he had it so I did some then he offered I said sure and dident even care to see how much he was giving me ..... Soni know I have bpd but really I have every adhd on the hyper list of symptoms and have since before school..... I'm trying to talk to my theprist about this cuz I'm not sold yet as when they put me in ritlan I had worse anxiousness so I flapped my hands and made sounds since they ked did that I've kind of been under the impression that it couldn't have been adhd .... but since my partner got his asd1 diagnosis it's been brought up alot from him .... I even talk fast and loud lol my whole life lol 😆
My view for what’s it’s worth is that ADHD left untreated / not properly managed develops into what looks much more like BPD. Especially if there is added trauma, high stress or an addiction battle going on. Whereas BPD early onset has more trauma going on it early life. Are they totally separate conditions. That’s debatable. Diagnosis proliferate. Look at how many new conditions there are.
I would say the impulsivity and focusing issues seem to be driven by external factors in BPD and more episodic, whereas in ADHD it's there pretty much all the time. Also even ADDers without the hyperactivity component do tend to wriggle or fidget some when sitting for any length of time. I don't think this is the case with BPD from what I've seen.
@@DrDanielFox Another suggestion as I work my way through your invaluable videos. A follow up to BPD in the workplace, it would be really helpful to learn more about when to disclose BPD or ADHD, potential risks, possible benefits, and to hear any anecdotes you may have on this. Or even how to discuss it with those close to you. Not being able to afford professional advice, I can't thank you enough for these videos, but it made me realise what a great community you could build, have you considered something like discord to bring together your viewers?
Dr. Daniel Fox, I understand so many of these people in the moments. I hope you get the chance to read my comments I have left in other videos. Thank you. I know you are very appreciated.
Ex Girlfriend claims shes adhd which I agree, but also says she was miss diagnosed about being bi-polar. I dont think shes that but I feel shes BPD. She hasnt been to a doc in a while but our 4 yr relationship came to an end. She was arrested for physical abuse out in public, non stop beating on me until the cops came.(Cop shook my hand saying he never saw someone have the restraint I did) She also physically destroyed my property(smashed my phones, hid my expensive car keys in un-findable places) and had no recollection of it, until last fight of the relationship she had a realization. Sad because I wasnt the one who ended it, even though I should haVe wayyy sooner. I feel BPD is all over her
Great vid! Adhd tip: watch at 1.5 speed. Helps digest video better. Watched twice on regular speed but soothing voices always cause me to drift off
Edit: I’m happy this could help so many. Thank you all.
I will use this when I watch another Dr Daniel fox vid later thank you I'm showing it to my friend with adhd I'll ask her about it first tho
Thank you this helped alit :)
I do this all the time with every video regardless of what it's purpose is lmaooo I always knew my adhd folks would be able to relate
Oh dang, I never knew you could do this. This. Just. Changed. My. Life.
Same! 🤣
Just wanted to point out as someone with predominantly inattentive ADHD, that almost nothing you described about ADHD applies to our subtype. We are decidedly not 'go go go' and we tend not to have all these problems you describe that make us difficult for others which is why we often go undiagnosed. This made me realize that that's similar to the discouraged and self-destructive borderline types which often go undiagnosed because they cause fewer obvious problems for others.
It's interesting how in both cases of ADHD and BPD which are so very different, that there can be such different presentations caused by the same underlying issue.
@@georgewolfe2963 The underlying issues are different. That is what he means by core content. What drives BPD and what causes ADHD are separate and different.
He is differentiating how impulsivity shows up in ADHD and how it shows up in BPD. In fact, almost this entire video is differentiating the two because the term "impulsivity" shows up very differently in ADHD than it does in BPD.
I have both. The inattentiveness is 100% adhd. The mood swings, distrust of people/insecurity in my close friendships is BPD. Feeling worthless is BPD. Believing that anyone you care deeply about will leave is BPD. ADHD with RSD sound a whole lot like BPD though. I don’t have any of the episodes of rage/violence typically associated with BPD, though. I guess I’m on the low end of the spectrum, but the emotional dysregulation I experience only when triggered and I know most of them enough now to pull out my DBT tricks. No one who knows me now would ever know. MY adhd stuff I can’t hid though. My brain is a mess 😩
What is RSD?
Right there with ya 😅
@@mcseavers RSD Is Rejection Sensitive Disorder. I also have BPD and ADHD.
well, it's like you're reading my brain here except i dont know quite as much about myself as you do.. all i know is i've been diagnosed with both at different points in my life.. i've not had the opportunity to get into dbt yet as i am now without access to healthcare, but im getting a dbt workbook off amazon soon.
I completely get you!
I identify with so many of the traits of each lable.
I was surprised you focused on the impulsivity and motor-driving overlap instead of the overlap between RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria) in those with ADHD and extreme sensitivity to rejection and abandonment in those with BPD. But after watching the video, I really appreciated your choice of focus, too. The former confusion of symptoms has me really puzzling over why I am so sensitive to being rejected and whether this is due to ADHD or BPD.
Yesssss. All of this
Also the topic of medication for ADHD with comorbid bpd...really tough
Sara Dailey Yes, that is really critical. The overlap of symptoms between GAD and ADHD is another example of this, since stimulants risk exacerbating anxiety. It is essential to get the diagnosis right. From what I gather from Dr. Fox’s videos, BPD benefits more from CBT, DBT and other non-psychiatric treatments, whereas ADHD is directly treatable with stimulant medication. It has been argued ADHD is the most treatable of disorders although potentially disastrous if left untreated. The sensitivity to rejection in both BPD and ADHD is very important for future research to address IMO.
I expected more emphasis on sensitivity and anxiety as well, @Delltron. I also think it’s important to note that one is a personality disorder (often the product of early dysfunctional/traumatic experiences) and the other is neurological. Different means to similar ends, I suppose. My boyfriend reps the BPD, and I’m the one with ADHD. It can be a WILD ride, let me tell ya... 🤦🏼♀️
No one has EVER mentioned rsd to me. I've been diagnosed with BPD since I was 15 and just this year, I'm 32, with ADHD.
My BPD prevents me from social intrusiveness, although I have severe ADHD. It’s the fear of rejection and The chronic feeling of being a bother or being invisible, but once I speak, I speak very excessively and so fast! Please make a video about how a comorbid condition can change how other one symptoms and how it manifests itself. I’ve self-diagnosed myself lately with BPD because I’ve never been in a physical fight and rarely screamed at people, so I thought I didn’t fit the diagnosis until I learned about the quiet type. And symptoms are like describing every moment of my life and every cell of my personality. I just thought that was me! I didn’t realize that it was a personality pattern. Such a revelation, but now after noticing that emotional distortion, I cannot trust my feelings anymore and I can’t tell when it’s really a negative situation and if somebody is trying to hurt my feeling on purpose. When I’m splitting and when it’s true that somebody has changed? How could we tell? I’m confused. We can’t be always reading through things and overreacting, right? I think it’s reasonable to think that sometimes our fear has a merit of truth? Mean people exist and humans change. Sometimes it’s good to take a hint to judge and filter people in your circle. It can’t be always hypersensitivity?
Thank you for all the videos.
I was misdiagnosed as having BPD when in fact it was just ADHD with severe inattentiveness, a high intelligence with a lack of motivation due to understimulation and autism. I displayed some signs commonly associated with bpd, but their origin was very different and I never had a fear of anyone leaving me. I value others' right to personal space, yet can say I've met a lot of supposedly normal people (mainly men) who did not. I've had a lot of people who thought I liked them because I'm quite nice and caring toward most people, because that's part of the non-western culture I grew up in but also because my autism rendered me incapable of knowing what would be an appropriate level of kindness to show to others. I'd end up no longer seeing those people because I just did not like them back, nor did I want to see them as often as they would want to see me. They labeled me as having "unstable relationships", when I didn't consider those to have been relationships/friendships. I developed "mild" bulimia with only subjective binges after a prolonged period of being anorexic, which isn't all that uncommon. They said bulimia was a clear sign I had BPD. I'm extremely concise in how I analyse myself and things outside of me, meaning I don't just swallow any theory about me or anything else people try to sell me. I'll look for good reasons as to why I should believe A vs B. I'll criticize people for saying something that's not true or something that people simply can't know, especially mental health professionals, becauce if they want to give the impression they're experts on something, they should be accurate. They called that defiant, when all I wanted was to uncover the truth about why I was struggling so I could receive the right treatment. In hindsight, I had extremely obvious signs of adhd and autism. They told me I simply didn't want to achieve anything in life. What I'm trying to say by all of this: encountering an actually competent mental health professional isn't all that easy, and just because people thought you had BPD, does not mean you have it.
Anyway, doctor. I know the area of personality disorders is your area of expertise, but could you post videos on autism (maybe as a differential diagnosis) or a more elaborate one on ADHD? I'm very curious to find out what you'd have to say about those conditions.
This is my favorite comment on this thread! I actually do have both ADHD and BPD, but I am exactly like you, in the way I know exactly which parts are the ADHD, which are BPD, and the symptoms that are from both. I've lived my whole life so far thinking I was crazy...even WITH the BPD dx since I was 15. I have seen a crap ton of professionals who have agreed to BPD, they've all added: depression, anxiety, PTSD/C-PTSD, and no one mentioned ADHD until this year!!!???? I'm 32!!! It explains everything that didn't make sense with the rest of the disorders. I could put substance abuse disorder up there too, except that's a misdiagnosis, I believe, because I feel like it was more self medication, which makes sense with the ADHD! I really would like a more in depth video about all of this!! Although I'm not complaining. You may be the only person who I feel actually understands and we are so lucky to have your videos!! Thank you for what you do.
You rationalizing all your behaviours; so why do you needDr. Fox to agree with you? Clearly that'a what you are after.
You don't want to achieve anything because you are afraid of failing. This holds true wether you have bpd, bipolar, adhd or whatever.
Eaty McEatison Omg yes everything yes! This is exactly me!
@@GM-yb5yg Sure.
This is wonderful information. I was dx BPD over 40 years ago, All of our children and my husband are ADHD or ADD, one with Asperger, our Granddaughter ADD, Grandson Autistic. The descriptions given here are so accurate. In fact in one class I got told to leave because I was clicking my BIC CLICK PEN! I changed teachers because I couldn't deal with the embarrassment, I didn't even realize I was doing it. Worry is my middle name has been since a small child. I want to scream this information from the hilltops, people are so uncomfortable and uninformed about these real conditions so you just get avoided..... Didn't ask for these.... Like others don't ask for their life altering conditions. Thank you Dr. Fox for putting this out there. Truly compassionate human being you are.
+mama baehr 🦊👍
Every person is responsible for their own responsibilities. Nobody owes you anything. Moreover, why should anybody want to be close to you and suddenly get attacked with no reason.
Hi Dr. Daniel - thank you so much for this video! I've gone for so long thinking there was something "wrong" with me in the sense that I could relate to the feeling of restlessness described in ADHD - but never really fit the criterias.
I sought help one year ago and was recently diagnosed with BPD - and suddently everything made sense.
When I'm not triggered I can focus and relax - however, when I'm in emotional turmoil I'm an impulsive restless mess.
This was so helpfull to watch - especially also since my partner is diagnosed with ADHD. It helped me put in to words the different sense of restlessness that I so often feel that we have.
He's always like "yes I know the feel" and YES, I know that he knows - but on another level.
I'm definately gonna watch this together with him as well - so that he might have a better understanding of the difference.
I'm sorry if I repeat myself in this comment, but sometimes when I write - especially when its not in my first language - I get lost.
Thank you so much - your videos help me a lot between my sessions with my therapist.
I'm starting DBT tomorrow - I'm so scared, but I feel motivated to learn new strategies to ease my BPD.
Lots of love from Norway!
Stine Sofie Grasto All the best to you,try not to be scared,you will find DBT so helpful ♥️
I have never heard a better description of what my BPD programming feels like. Although it may seem silly, the coffee pot analogy was perfect. This was so comforting to hear because I didnt realize other people felt like that, too. I look forward to the video about slowing down. Thank you for your videos, Dr. Fox!
+Sarah Johnson 🦊👍
Dr. Fox. Thank you for giving me the insight I need to learn as much as I can on BPD/ADHD.
I struggle and suffer everyday with my symptoms. Unfortunately I have been unsuccessful in finding a psychiatrist that has a true understanding of how Complex childhood trauma, BPD, ADHD, PTSD, and social anxiety can cause so much suffering. I don't know where to go with this, I just wish there were more dr's whom understand the difficulty of these very intense conditions.
Your videos help out ALOT.
Thank you!
How are you today Maria?
Have you tried EMDR?
🙏🙏🙏
I think it would also be helpful for this video, to also note that there is also ‘Inattentive’ type of ADHD. Because, as someone with BPD and also someone who is looking at being assessed for ADHD, I feel I’m more inattentive than hyperactive. I think to look at where the overlap is between inattentive adhd and BPD and what inattentive adhd core content would look like. Thanks for the video ☺️
Same here! I’m not hyperactive I’m definitely the inattentive type
And girls and women present differently, and if intelligent usually learn go-arounds and other coping strategies. Hormones also play a huge role. Then there is medical misogyny, where you are much more likely to be diagnosed with mood disorders and/or personality disorders, and have adhd, autism and/or trauma be what's really going on. I'd recommend Dr. Russell Barkley's youtube vids; he is top of the field in adhd research, and says that emotional dysregulation, which he calls DESR, or "deficient emotional self regulation," is always a core feature of ADHD and ought to be included in the diagnostic criteria.
I'm mixed. Or I think now is called complex. I'm a female. I USED to have that outwardly I obvious, leg bouncing, blurt out the answer in grade school. In junior high I would knit or draw or twirl my pen to help me concentrate. When especially make teachers scream at.you "sit still" and there aren't any other girls in class who can't mask then you sit still...but space out because your teacher is talking SO slow.
a year late, but thank you SO much for this video. i was diagnosed with ADHD last year, and recently i’ve begun to suspect i may have BPD- most if not all of the symptoms add up for me, but it’s so hard to figure out what’s ADHD and what could be BPD. what you said about anxiousness and fearfulness made so much sense to me.
My anxiousness drives my impulsivity !! Wow! Eye opening. Thank God for you Dr. Fox , you javelin a gift for explaining these things.
So my take away is; if I can get my anxieties under control then I will be less impulsive.
My daughter (19) has BPD and more ADD than ADHD (hyperactive element not prevalent)… stimulant calms her anxiety and helps her mood/depression from.BPD. Helps her focus & do better interpersonally with others.
It’s like a flipped switch.
Only starting to treat the ADD but WOW!!
She’s starting to use DBT skills as well. Praying it gives her relief.
Thank you for this video! I didn’t realize how common comorbidity is. I have both BPD and ADHD and this video was really informative & validating ❤️
This is great! I have many Adhd, Bipolar, BPD, and OCD! This is so helpful they all overlap. Another counselor said D.I.D. but still doubt that. What I love about this.. Is how complex the mind is, these labels really help with all the "controls in the cockpit". The more insight I have, the higher functioning I become.. Thank you for this video.. Would love to hear about transitions in both disorders. I still struggle with that
Thank you!
April god damn
Ehhh DID is... eh. But- there can definitely be elements of dissociation in people with BPD, and even some breaks with reality. When my partner is having a BPD “episode,” I swear, he even looks physically different. Something in his eyes switch and it’s like he’s looking right through me. It’s dissociation.
I of course cant say for certain that i have both without a diagnosis, but i have ADHD and through this video and a couple others i can confidently say i think i have both. All of what's said explains my thoughts and actions almost perfectly, specifically because i know i have both types of impulsivity in my daily life. Thank you very much for being the boot that kicks me in the direction of getting help
I wish you could be my doctor. Your videos always help, you’re really great. I’ve been diagnosed with both and as for impulsivity, I now see at 33 that I’m more the adhd impulsive type, when I used to have both a few years ago. But therapy and self work really helped with bpd impulsivity. 💪🏻 what I love about your videos, contrarily to some other people one YT, is that you always give a sense of control and hope for people with bpd instead of shaming us for being The Worst Thing that ever happened to our friends and families, even if we work super hard to better ourselves. So yeah, thank you for your kindness and empathy too 🖤
Does untreated ADHD in Childhood lead to BPD? I was diagnosed with BPD at age 15 and then ADHD at 18. I only received therapy for depression prior till age 32, but took ADHD meds for a long time. Its very hard for me to relax and I'm always anxious. Its hard for me to focus, remember, pay attention and sit still for long periods unless its a topic I'm really interested in. Its hard for me to read a book, watch a movie, or complete a task in one setting. I'm working with a psychiatrist to try and get ADHD meds (as well as benzos for anxiety), but its difficult.
Yes. That's me. Keep in mind I come from a 3rd world toxic masculinity and religios country. So as a child I was always just the weird kid. Now I'm 26 and a year ago with severe sweeting, and lose of all self control and inability to do anything productive. I have Both ADHD and BPD. And a sorta conformation from my sessions, that my mom also has if not same diagnosis then another personality disorder.
Personally, I’ve read that it’s more linked with untreated or unmanaged Reactive Attachment Disorder in childhood that then can progress into BPD as we know it. However I am also not a psychologist. I just have BPD and did a tonne of research to understand myself better. Hope this helps
Im at the state rn of being Annoyed at myself and thinking cause I struggle thinking and I’m forgetting a lot so
I'd say it's more of a correlation than causation. BPD is often caused by emotional abuse and neglect in childhood, which would also include things like medical neglect and under-diagnosing
@@NattyBurz Very good comment! Thats what I was thinking too
Thank you. I have ADHD and was diagnosed with BPD, but it was hard to know if the symptoms were from ADHD or if I have BPD as well.
Marte FCC was. X 55.
@@jjjahner56 ml
Thank you so much for your videos. :) I have ADHD and BPD, along with bipolar 2, depression, anxiety, PTSD, partial complex seizures in the inner cortex of my brain, and generalized mood disorder. I've been told by a professional that they thought I've been over diagnosed. I recently have been exposed to information about aspbergers/autism in women and that ASD can overlap with BPD and ADHD. I feel a diagnosis of ASD would explain (not exaggerating) nearly all of my symptoms I've been experiencing since my childhood. I've spent literally over half of my life in and out of talk therapy, medicating, lifestyle changes, etc. to behave out of alignment with my internal experience and more in alignment with my values and adaptive behaviors, but I do still experience those symptoms that coincide with ASD. I believe that I have BPD and ADHD as well- as diagnosed by professionals. I don't assume I am on the spectrum, but I have found it very helpful to learn more about it. I would immensely appreciate if you would make a video about the overlap between autism spectrum disorder and borderline personality disorder. I checked your website and didn't see info about comorbidity between the two, but I'm wondering if you or anyone else could point me in the direction of information you've put out on the subject or if anyone else has resources as well. Thank you so so much!
Brilliant! Thank you Dr Fox you make everything so clear for me. I was diagnosed ADHD 3 years ago and BPD traits 3 months ago... I’m 50yrs old next month so have been suffering with the exact symptoms you describe for a long time! 😰 however, I am very positive about the future 😁 my ADHD medication and coping strategies are beginning to work well to slow me down and I have found that this gives me much hope for my BPD personal recovery 👍🏻 I am on chapter 2 of your workbook, which, combined with your excellent videos, have given me strength, determination and compassionate self-acceptance for who am I am and why this personality developed within me
What do ADHD meds do for you, specifically? What type of doctor diagnosed you ADHD?
I have been diagnosed with both ADHD (type C) and BPD this year, this video really made what’s going on in my head clear!
Could you do a follow-up video discussing rejection sensitive dysphoria in ADHD (whether or not you believe it exists as a standalone phenomenon, or reflects co-occurring BPD)?
Please do this ^
Dr Fox we still need this video!!
Yes please
DR.FOX COULD YOU COVER BPD AND SEXUAL IDENTITY OR LACK THEREOF
Omg I hope he does! I've always struggled with this!
I actually went on Grindr. My ex was like but you're straight..
I'm a mess😭
That would be a very interesting one BPD and sexual ID
ooooh i would be interested in this as welll
I’ve become convinced I have both. That motor sense I definitely engage in and purposely so because that’s when I’m most productive. I’ve found that I only do one of the sabotaging behaviours now but only because my anxiety means that I have learned that when I have the bubbling pot sensation I know only action will make me feel better but that I have to find an action that won’t have a bad consequence.
I've researched both for a long time and undertaken much reflection. I was told by a mental health professional I score highly for BPD but because I have held down a job. I shouldn't pursue it as I would regret it and my self harming wasn't as bad as the severe cases he had seen. I have used Dr Fox's books and worksheets when my BPD (based on that assessment and my own) is bad and it helped. Along with his videos. Which are very comforting, as some videos on BPD. Paint BPD very negatively which makes you feel more depressed. Ive taken various self assessments for ADHD and scored highly. I definitely have a motor that doesn't stop. I have been that hyperfocused that my speech has been impacted by tiredness but I kept working until I was literally struggling to articulate what I was saying. My Child is being assessed and was asked to explain the end point of a visual instruction to follow. We both got lost and could not follow. It was like the assessor was talking fast about words I knew but they felt random and in no recognisable pattern. My brain couldn't process. Same with mathematical formula. My brain feels like it goes in slow motion. But with other things I am very quick at connecting dots. All very confusing. Dr Fox if you ever offer online consultations count me in!
Hey Doctor Fox. Thank you so much for another great video. That´s my combo unfortunately. It´s very difficult - but ADHD mostly affects just memory and focus. To be honest yeah, the feeling goes I can´t get going anymore. I´ve gone 30 years without any help and now I have limited access to help - and yeah, the hopelessness kinda grows. Trying to be strong but squeezed as a lemon. Hoping to be able to get your book soon at least.
Femme Fatale hey girl, thanks for reaching out. Yes, but for me it looks like I need full 8 hrs and less than 50 hrs work I currently have. Exercise does help a LOT and one of workouts I would recommend in particular is Body Combat where you discharge all that negative aggressive energy and it keeps you on tips of your toes literally as well as figuratively: you get tired and you don’t get bored at all while at the same time training your focus cause the choreography is not easy.
SAME-IT GETS WORSE W/AGE FOR ME...MORE DISCONNECTED/NUMB/DEAD AS A DOORNAIL INSIDE/FORGOTTEN/INADEQUATE.......CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHY SUICIDE IS BAD WHEN IT WILL CLEARLY ONLY GOT SO MUCH WORSE,SO MUCH LONELIER.........BPD IS A CURSE FROM GOD...GOD HAS ABANDONED US.
@
Alla Kitaeva I'm almost 70 yrs old, suffering from both of these disorders myself. After all of this time, going to therapist after therapist, I've come to the conclusion that aside from taking meds for bpd and adjusting to the adhd (which you have to do to avoid addiction), realizing 'the only one that can help me is myself, is important'. Dr. Phil says, "What's the payoff, what do you get in return", I thought these were great questions. You have to understand the problem in order to live with it, in fact hon, it'll always be with you, so you need to find productive ways to satisfy the need that's left, you need to get excited about something and let your disorder dive into it.
Curteous ADHD is a neurological disorder. I believe it’s the same for Autism.
@@meghancoppola8640 I think you're right in some cases, but I think each case unique, it's hard to pinpoint, for me anyways.
All my life I felt lonely because I was so different from my peers in so many ways yet so like them in so many others but still never able to fully connect. My symptoms isolated me and getting diagnosed with multiple disorders made me feel even more lonely. Even more like no one will ever see me or my uniqueness in a positive light. I have felt like I was on my own island away from everyone else but close enough to see what I was missing. Finding videos like this that seem tailored to what I thought was my own special brand of disorder is encouraging in breaking that feeling of aloneness. There ARE other people with my similar combination of struggles and there ARE medical professionals who can treat comorbidities like this. Thank you not only for this video but for the work you do in understanding complicated cases to help people like me.
for one who has both i've never found such an accurate video when it comes to describing the difference in the impulsivity aspects but also the aspect of how the panic and anxiety driven face of bpd combines with the impulsive outbursts. It's a blessing and i thank you very much for your much needed videos!
Raise your hand if you had to go back in the video multiple times because you kept losing focus. 🙋♀️
when you started talking about how bpd controls your pessimistic views of the future i felt so related to that. i am always trying to define what that feeling is, and you defined it for me!! thank you!!
I am diagnosed with both ADHD and borderline. My personality disorder developement has got to do with being raised by an autistic mother. My father is narcistic.
In my childhood it looked like I was the one with autism and my parents were fine. During my whole childhood I thought everything about me is wrong and I should be gratefull with having 'normal parents' who did their best to take care of me.
I am not angry anymore at my parents. I never was angry at my mother, because despite everything I always felt her true love towards me. I don't have contact with my father anymore because of self-protection - if I let him enter into my life again he will eventually start humiliating me on such a subtle way I will realise it afterwards.
But it is so lonely. My anger goes mainly towards other people. I cannot blame my mother she doesn't understand me, because she just can't. Other people CHOOSE not to understand me. They let me down and they let my mother down and they will continue doing so, because they are ignorant and they refuse to take me seriously.
The psychiatry is developing, however it doesn't matter because on this world nobody will help you. If you are weak then people are not interested in you.
I have to deal with extreme procrastination behaviour. I am so used to fail about everything.
I am sick and tired of people who say I should think more positively to gain self-esteem. People cannot force developing that by just saying they are fine.
It's more important to find out why one has a low self-esteem.
I understand how you feel ArticialSoul
Thank you so much Dr Fox! Please keep putting out your videos. I'm very well-read on the subject of BPD. Most other content on TH-cam is review. Your videos are different. You have an excellent understand of BPD, much more thorough than my therapists seem to be.
I love how easy it is to follow you talking. Not too fast, not too slow...perfect pitch. I am noise sensitive, especially voices and I am impatient so I really enjoyed this video. And you were animated enough to keep me interested, but not overly animated to the point of annoying. I actually sat and listened for about 5 min without getting distracted once.
Can you do a video on paranoia and BPD? I’ve been having a lot of paranoid thoughts and I believe them even if others tell me they aren’t true. I’ve been having a hard time with this lately! Thanks for all your helpful videos!
Yes!!!
Consider schizoaffective disorder
Try getting more sleep practice mindfulness eat healthy drink more water less sugary drinks deep breathing practice observing your thoughts with emotional detachment . Observe without engaging with them
I have both and I've been diagnosed 3 days ago. Honestly the diagnosis made everything so much brighter to me. I have had problems in school, but I was always able to manage them and help everything on a decent level, which made me literally proud when I got diagnosed, since I didn't hit the exact behavioral criteria for bpd, less for adhd, because of my hard work that I put into being a healthy person towards myself and others. I struggle a lot with inattentiveness, have struggled with addictions, but I've been able to manage them (I don't take anything anymore) and gosh my whole life, every romantic relationship has been a disaster in the end. I'm currently managing even that!!! I feel like I've really worked hard all my life against this diagnosis, not even knowing it was there and always thought about myself in terms of being different, but right now I am aware of just how much effort I've put to it...
How did it effect your relationships? Can you be more specific? Maybe with some examples?
@@alouise3557 I become tiring and exhausting, I have a tendency to pass the responsibility for my emotions and my well-being onto my romantic partner. Things that made perfect sense to me, for example I could be super angry at some point and then just casually dissociate and not even remember that, indicating that it wasn’t this much of a deal and I don’t understand why she is shocked or doesn’t understand my behavior. I would plan to do one thing and feel like it very deeply and strongly to just casually forget about it as if I never cared. I would try to fit in the needs of my partner, completely ignoring mine ones and not even being able to see them, then when I found out about them I would struggle communicating them, bursting out with anger at her only to apologize literally 2 seconds after that and say that I didn’t know what was happening with me. Well in the end I end up being a burden, not an autonomous entity, completely reliable on the other person to the point where she’s exhausted. That’s what she told me when she broke up with me. We’re friends now and receiving the diagnosis really helped either her and me understand what was happening. I think the worst thing that would be happening to me were the said outbursts of anger and dissociating afterwards. It made it really difficult to accept the responsibility for the uncontrolled behavior since it really didn’t seem real and didn’t feel like being me during the outbursts. I would apologize and not be able to understand what truly happened with me as I watched my partner still processing the situation from 30 seconds ago that I have struggle remembering and felt like it was not even me who did it.
Ty Dr. fox. I forget my obsessive thoughts are my bpd and not me. Watching this twice over. 💚
I agree with everything in this video, coming from a place of ADHD, depression, and severe mood swings (but with any other symptoms of BPD that can't be explained by ADHD), but my lord dr fox you are very handsome please continue to exist I appreciate you, in and out.
Two questions #1 would you agree that consistent despair & giving up on life is a form of self harm like cutting? #2 How would you differentiate between BPD & ADHD once you understand the RSD aspect in ADHD? Thanks a lot.
This is interesting. A few days ago I have found in myself that somehow my extended despair, self-abandonment and giving up on my life seem to me as a way of self harm. It feels like a way punishing myself and my life.
I was officially diagnosed with ADHD.. I had all the tell tale signs but I grew up when ADHD wasn't really a thing and if it was it was a boy thing. I am a BPD, ADHD, PTSD, severe anxiety and depression, and impulse control issue sufferer. It can be so hard. But I have a great therapist and psychiatrist that work with me. And I am leaps and bounds better than even a year ago.
As a kid I was diagnosed with adhd? And for a long time I internalized everything. I attacked myself in my head almost everyday. I was very angry and violent around 11-15 years of age. I get hyperactive too. I’m not so violent now at 17, but when I’m losing people in my life I feel like I’m forced to keep it quiet. I watch how people around me behave I just don’t think it’s safe to tell anyone, no one in my life has acted how I needed them to.
When I’m angry I self harm. I start to hate myself and I try to think less of me, is there a chance I have….both?
I’d be interested in understanding what comorbid adhd and bpd looks like and how it differs from comorbid bpd and autism, if that’s something you’re open to exploring. It seems to me like the social hindrances of being neurodivergent could contribute substantially to the development of bpd, and there are a lot of overlapping traits that probably influence presentation of each disorder in interesting ways, but I’ve never seen the dynamics covered in much depth.
I'm diagnosed with both. Wow I can't get enough of your videos, your insight is amazing just watching these helps calm and slow me down. Can't wait for the next one😊
+Alex Mercado 🦊👍
I have both also.
same ✌🏻
I am a comorbid mess🙄 Been a challenging life.
This channel is wonderfully educational and helps speed the healing.
This video helped me confirm that I don’t have BPD! I have ADHD and I went to a psychiatrist for the first time and within my half hour of meeting her she diagnosed me with BPD and prescribed me lithium. I’ve been through extremely through phych testing and they found no sign of a mood or personality disorder. I now am on a hunt for another psychiatrist yet again
So glad you found it helpful.
I feel more confused [about myself] after this video. Hmm. The symptoms sound very similar still. I am a million percent positive that I have ADHD. However, my mother has BPD and I see similar traits (regarding relationships) in myself, but I am outgrowing the need for drama. I still blow up in angry episodes but it is usually related to my poor executive functioning causing anxiety and then someone/something triggers me at the most inopportune moment. Thank you for this video; I have had difficulty finding videos comparing these 2 disorders, even though (in my opinion) they seem to overlap the most (as opposed to other psych disorders).
I’m so glad it was helpful. Be well.
Could you possibly also make a video about why some people with bpd dont want to grow up? I'm at a very confusing part of my life and will be 20 this thursday, but i dont want to get older and i feel very emotional the closer it gets.
This actually reminds me more of Asperger's.... Which I guess they technically changed to Autism Spectrum Disorder.
!!!! This is me too, I don’t want to at all but also I wasn’t supposed to exist past 2017, so I didn’t plan further and now I’m like ?? So I keep getting older and I’m supposed to know things and how to exist etc???? Didn’t sign up for it!!! :(
shit same I keep going into my childhood I can’t grow up I just can’t I feel like the most childlike yet most mature person I know.
@@theafterparty726 At least we aren’t alone :(
Turned 19 last month and while the years go by, birthdays come...
Mentally, I feel stuck at 15.
I love your videos, truly.. As a woman who went undiagnosed with adhd until 4 months ago, I need to point out that your description of adhd impulsivity is correct except that the bpd impulsivity content especially substance abuse and spending sprees are also very typical of adhd. I think what you are getting at is where it comes from, bpd more of a bottle up of emotions/anxiety and impulsive reaction vs adhd trait impulsivity, not emotion driven but driven by lack of stimulation. I guess it gets messy because adhd can also be emotionally impulsive. Apparently we have higher trait impulsivity and bpd has higher state impulsivity
Is it possible that they’re just a spectrum of the same thing? Same with procrastinstion and also some narcissistic tendencies they all seem to overlap with BPD in their own ways and ADHD and it’s like, why can’t we just call all of this “emotional dysregulation” or “emotional underdevelopment”
+Taylor Barnett yes, absolutely. It’s all dimensional.
Oh yay, I requested that video - thank you so much!! I can't wait to watch it!
I find it interesting, and beneficial to hear these things ! I had to learn about BPD, 'the very hard way ' , from the backwards forward, from the inside to the out, and not fun by any way one may look at it ! It was only after I had 'gone thru' so much complication in my own life ( due to others's issues), that I happened to find all these great helps !
Adderall + BDP: We know that there is no specific medicine prescribed to treat BPD, but many with ADHD are prescribed stimulants such as Adderall. These stimulants come with many adverse side effects similar to symptoms of BPD, especially anger outbursts and anxiety. The daily come-down from Adderall alone initiates a wave of bad thoughts, stress, emptiness, and impulsivity. How do you work with patients that deal with this combination?
I have both & bipolar. For me, the impulsivity in BPD is trigger-driven, my ADHD is not. Impulsivity in bipolar is always in the manic phase and like you say, it lasts longer, weeks even.
yeah i feel like he gets the impulsivity thing so wrong
You explained it in a way that was helpful. Thanks.
So i did not get my adhd diagnosis as expected. I have all the symptoms and have had them all my life, but my doctor thinks its just the autism i was diagnosed with as a child (theres a lot of autism symptoms i dont have, and the ones i had as a child i think is likely symtoms of my attachment issues to my parents) . I think i might have developed bpd (or at least i have traits of it). I tried taking adhd meds i got from a friend for a week and it reeeeally helped. i became calm (not an emotional rollercoaster as i always usually am) , i still felt the emotions but i could bear them they werent over bearing and i had less impulses to act on them , i had impulse control (!!!) , i was less hyper active and more patient and - the absolute best - I COULD THINK - I didnt have ten tabs open at once in my head but i was present in the moment and could think clearly - i became more productice and less distracted because of this. Can adhd meds have effect on bpd or autism as well ? or is this a sign i might have adhd ?
Great question. I'd thought ADHD stimulant meds would only be be balancing /regulating for ADHD, but I'm intrigued to learn more about the effects on other brains 😊xx
@@anne-louisegoldie I am still think I was misdiagnosed and that really I have ADHD as well as depression and BPD. Coffee makes me calm and Adhd meds real help. And there is just so many signs...
Have The BPD diagnosis now and have not been able to get a secondhand opinion on my Adhd diagnos (and they probably Will not give me since I have BPD). But I wisj i could get it.
@@ADevilFromHeaven You should definitely be able to have this conversation. A diagnosis of anything doesn't mean putting blinkers on to the rest of the person's lived experience. 🤗🤗xx
In Britain, everything gets lumped under anxiety and depression. It's impossible to get a diagnosis on the NHS and thus, extremely damaging
I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid but the way you described impulsivity I probably have BPD too.
After 2 years of therapy I m just learning to love myself for who I m. The war with myself is over. 😊
That’s terrific!! Be well.
Can't sleep so I'm watching Dr. Fox. Thanks Doc.🦋😊🌼
I haven't been sleeping for a week... worried about loosing my family due to my BPD symptoms ... Dr.Fox has been a wonderful help with my ability to communicate my wants/needs/thoughts which eases my thoughts of me being a burden on my wife and causing traumas to my children... and the information he gives helps me to communicate and understand my care providers better
I have a diagnosis of BPD but I think I have ADHD as well. Every time I ask my therapists about it, they won't even entertain it and just shut it down straight away. It's really frustrating.
I have the exact same thing but the other way around! I have ADHD but I think I could have BPD. All mental health professionals think it’s just because I want to have it (which I don’t). I feel your frustrations
Thank you for this video. I was diagnosed with ADHD early on in elementary school, but after really looking into BPD I fit that as well heavily. Always felt it was more than just ADHD, especially due to the dissociation that I've had all my life on and off...but never had a name for the dissociation until the last couple years. You feel crazy
Definitely will be going to talk with a professional at some point
Thank you for making me feel heard and seen. I’m struggling. Hope we can talk more, I’m so angry at my mind.
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
Can you talk about rejection sensitivity with ADHD vs BPD?
You are the BEST! Thank you for giving me the feeling that someone understands me. That feeling is priceless & empowering. ❣️❣️❣️
I am not 100% sure if I have BPD (I only found out about it today on TH-cam), but I am pretty sure I have some sort of disorder. I just can't seem to figure out what it is I have. However, BPD sounds like what I experience. I don't have the money for a therapist or psychologist and currently I am out of work due to the place I worked at closing. So, doing lots of research is all I have right now. That part about the coffee pot was spot on with my experience. I have a few different impulsive behaviors and when I don't do them, the pressure builds up. I have anxiety and depression often and I act on my impulsive/addictive behaviors to make me feel better, but then I feel worse shortly after and it is a cycle. Thanks for the videos. I have only watched a couple of videos of yours so far, but they are very informative.
Dr. Fox please address whether people with BPD really know that their behaviors/reactions are extreme and out of the norm. Or do they not actually see it? How do you approach a loved one who you believe has BPD if they believe that their behaviors are not abnormal? The angry reactions are so painful to recieve but watching them suffer through life is impossible when you love them. Clearly having knowledge and a proper diagnosis is essential for treatment. Doctors and psychologists often miss the diagnosis because they dont see the extreme emotional dysregulation in a typical 1 hour session. What can a loved one do to help get proper treatment for someone who so desperately needs it?
It really depends upon degree if impaired insight and severity of BPD.
Falling asleep to this dr lately and this has been on my mind lately
I found the description of Impulsivity as the driven by a motor feeling to be somewhat inaccurate. I find that is more an aspect of hyperactivity. Impulsivity for us seems to be more on the decision making and planning side. Those executive functions that guide our ability to think out all the steps of something and wait till its time to act
Also the description of ADHD was also very male orientated, which is that more gross hyperactivity
Thank you so much for another extremely enlightening video!
I’m so happy when I can read and listen to your explanations. Thank you for putting on screen words to go with your verbal explanations! ❤️
I have such a hard time concentrating and absorbing material. I can go back and listen again and again and hopefully it will sink in!
I gave up on antidepressants. I’m on mood stabilizer and Xanax. But I think I need to approach from adhd angle again. Tried one med. made it worse. So I didn’t pursue another choice.
I’m early 60’s, and as life and health issues get more complicated, I’m sinking more than treading.
You are great to share your knowledge and I love your delivery! All around #10 for me!
That is how I feel. When I think about a relational issue I feel this sense of urgency all the time, I did not know that this is not normal... No wonder my life feels like I am always on a roller coaster.
I'm also wondering what a differential diagnosis would look like for female symptoms of autism+ADHD vs. BPD vs. C-PTSD/PTSD of non-usa and non-uk cultures
yes !!!
I appreciate this. I've been diagnosed with BPD since I was 18, literally. Lately, I've been wondering if I have undiagnosed ADHD, but I can't get a mental health professional to take me seriously (since they think I'm just drug seeking) but this is very informative.
If you have insurance go to a private adhd clinic for a diagnosis.
I do have ADHD, I really relate to these traits more than the BPD ones. I think have some traits of BPD but not so so bad, I think it’s my neurodivergent brain who mirrors other peoples actions in these stressful moments because they been learnt from observation. But I’m really reflective on these things afterwards. I’m had been diagnosed with PTSD, with the acknowledgment of it being cPTSD.
You are great. love your videos!!
Talking about ADHD, you explain it with the observations of behaviour and not in a way that accurately conveys the actual experience/underlying behaviour - e.g. 'unable to wait your turn' is one effect, not the cause or key driver... if at all. I felt that it might be somewhat misleading in that the distinction wasn't clear if you intended to only describe observations or if you were attempting to describe the experience and drivers as well.
omg the anxiety coffee pot explanation is so good! Yes! I can relate so much to all the anxiety and fear being something that makes such a mess for me and sends me into unhealthy behaviours.
Also it's so weird, all the people closest to me have ADHD and I have BPD!
I have BPD and I really find your videos helpful! Thank you so much for what you do ❤️
I have ADHD and I have a friend with BPD who uses my adhd against to to make me feel lesser than him quite often. I had to stop being his friend because it ended up becoming very unhealthy for me for quite a while, which is very unfortunate.
That’s why they are part of the anti social Cluster B group together with psychopath, narcissist, and histrionics . No contact is the solution according to experts.
Could you do a video on distinguishing Rejection Sensitivity and Narcissism?
What I read is, Borderline is also called failed narcissist+ secondary psychopathy. it’s basically the same quality but on different dimensions or spectrum. Cluster B’s psychopathy, narcissist NPD, borderline BPD and histrionic, they are the same things on a spectrum or different dimension, and they interchange according to different situations and phases.
I would love to know what you think about the borderline and narcissistic couple. It seems that they attract each other in very unhealthy ways. For the Borderline this is hell on earth, and the narcissistic partner is just fine it seems. I love your videos. They are full of hope, patience and love. ❤️
+s vogti I did a video on the NPD and BPD couple.
@Dr. Daniel Fox Oh, i must have missed it! i will take a look now! Thank you! Greeting from Germany
I have both. I’m struggling with it. Really struggling. I was treated for BPD for 30 years with stabilizers and antidepressants but there was a hole in myself I couldn’t figure out.
As a kid I had ADD. I assumed when I went full blown BPD at 17 that that was all that I had, so for nearly 30 years I haven’t been treating my extremely bad attention and my inability to get up and do things.
It’s almost like depression when you want to do things but can’t.
Problem is that now that I’m taking add. I struggle with it with my mood swings, so I have to be _extremely_ careful how I take it. I’ve even learned to break 10 down to 1.5mm which helps me get off my seat, but doesn’t do anything for my inability to keep my attention on things.
I’m really struggling here. If I take add. too long, I get extreme burnout.
My body has to be finely grounded. I have to watch EVERYTHING. Moon phases affect me, rainy days, days that suddenly get cooler. I have to be careful with what I eat and that I get exercise.
It’s a complete tightrope for me or I spiral out of control.
Dr. Daniel Fox forever ❤
This was very helpful and reassuring. Thanks.
Glad it was helpful!
I have both and was diagnosed with ADHD when I was like 7-8 and diagnosed with borderline recently. For years I thought my dissociation was just me zoning out. Learning to separate some of the symptoms
That is a great strategy, to separate them out as it is likely to increase your level of insight and awareness. I wish you all the best.
4 years late to this video but I've been trying to make sense of everything. I know I'm adhd, but thought there was always more to it, and I've been looking into bpd because it explains a lot of things that I feel I have to constantly use brain power to monitor what I should or shouldn't do and sometimes even that disappears in anxious situations with too much to focus on. I've never directed anger at someone but it seems to be the worst when I'm driving, or stubbing a toe or accidently hurting myself somehow, or those small instances where you're doing something simple but it doesn't work the first 3-4 times. Get that little outburst of like "OMFG" for a few seconds and then after I scold myself for that little outburst. There's way more but it's not coming to mind.
Thank you, Dr. Daniel!
Thank you for all your videos!! I cant thank you enough!! You videos help me be brave in a way I never thought was possible!
I have both of these. Also OCD and memory problems with ahantasia. I can't remember any of my past. No memories. I do work on myself daily, build myself up then I get teared down from 100 to 0 multiple times a day. Takes me so long working on myself then go down like a teeter twitter or a roller coaster except stuck at bottom and get less don'e. I really need to talk to you Dr. Fox.
To learn more about this you can check out my book complex personality disorder. I’m sorry but I’m not taking new clients at this time. I wish you all the best.
Of course you'd have videos on this lol it's very validating that one could have a hard time discerning the two .... I have a borderline diagnosis and as a kid had a adhd diagnosis and since then I've been so unsure to even make sure I dint also have adhd .... as I have every hyperactive symptom including the one you stated about interrupting as my partner and I have noticed I start talking before I even enter the room and interrupted him Watching a show or reading ect ..... but I also have the anxious issues where I'm impulsive do to in the moment things like when I shot up meth for the sec time I went to hook up with someone not planing for meth he had it so I did some then he offered I said sure and dident even care to see how much he was giving me ..... Soni know I have bpd but really I have every adhd on the hyper list of symptoms and have since before school..... I'm trying to talk to my theprist about this cuz I'm not sold yet as when they put me in ritlan I had worse anxiousness so I flapped my hands and made sounds since they ked did that I've kind of been under the impression that it couldn't have been adhd .... but since my partner got his asd1 diagnosis it's been brought up alot from him .... I even talk fast and loud lol my whole life lol 😆
My view for what’s it’s worth is that ADHD left untreated / not properly managed develops into what looks much more like BPD. Especially if there is added trauma, high stress or an addiction battle going on.
Whereas BPD early onset has more trauma going on it early life. Are they totally separate conditions. That’s debatable. Diagnosis proliferate. Look at how many new conditions there are.
Another relevant, and well presented video. Thanks, Doc!
+mysterywhiteboy72 🦊👍
I would say the impulsivity and focusing issues seem to be driven by external factors in BPD and more episodic, whereas in ADHD it's there pretty much all the time. Also even ADDers without the hyperactivity component do tend to wriggle or fidget some when sitting for any length of time. I don't think this is the case with BPD from what I've seen.
I'd love some more tips about this combination!
You got it!
@@DrDanielFox 😍 Thank you!
@@DrDanielFox Another suggestion as I work my way through your invaluable videos. A follow up to BPD in the workplace, it would be really helpful to learn more about when to disclose BPD or ADHD, potential risks, possible benefits, and to hear any anecdotes you may have on this. Or even how to discuss it with those close to you.
Not being able to afford professional advice, I can't thank you enough for these videos, but it made me realise what a great community you could build, have you considered something like discord to bring together your viewers?
Dr. Daniel Fox, I understand so many of these people in the moments. I hope you get the chance to read my comments I have left in other videos. Thank you. I know you are very appreciated.
Thanks for this! It really helped me clear some things up. Great video.
Ex Girlfriend claims shes adhd which I agree, but also says she was miss diagnosed about being bi-polar. I dont think shes that but I feel shes BPD. She hasnt been to a doc in a while but our 4 yr relationship came to an end. She was arrested for physical abuse out in public, non stop beating on me until the cops came.(Cop shook my hand saying he never saw someone have the restraint I did) She also physically destroyed my property(smashed my phones, hid my expensive car keys in un-findable places) and had no recollection of it, until last fight of the relationship she had a realization. Sad because I wasnt the one who ended it, even though I should haVe wayyy sooner. I feel BPD is all over her
Wow this was huge . Thank you for this awesome video. Also I feel like your talking to me not just making a video.
my greatest thanks!
SO helpful thank you Dr. Fox
I feel like ADHD describes outward behavior while bpd describes your emotional state so it's hard to compare the two.
Very well explained 👍
Thanks 😊